June 12, 2025 • 34 mins
Meet today's guest, Helen Valleau, beloved Hoffman teacher and coach. Helen completed the Hoffman Process in March 1992 and began teaching the Process in November 1995. Now, three decades later, Helen sits down with Drew for a beautiful conversation about how the Process changed both her and the trajectory of her life.
Growing up in Edmonton, Alberta, Helen's childhood was very different from the other kids she knew. Her parents were corporate bush pilots who flew in the Arctic. Helen's mother loved to fly, daring to dream and follow her passion. She was the first woman inducted into Canada's Aviation Hall of Fame and was a recipient of the Amelia Earhart award. When Helen was 13, her mother was diagnosed with cancer and started on a long healing journey. Eventually, Helen lost her mother when Helen was nearing her 20th birthday. She shares what an incredible experience it was to witness her mother's fierce determination and strength, but also how hard it was to miss out on a softer, warmer experience of her mother.
Her mother's imprinting left her with a lot of pain and confusion, as well as the determination to emulate her mother. But as we know from doing the Process, that doesn't work. When Helen came to the Process at 32, she was "ready to lay it all out and be done with it." She knew she was messing up her life because of her patterns. At the Process, Helen realized she had "this Essence of eternal love and grace and wisdom and peace within her." She knew, beyond a doubt, that the trajectory of her life had changed.
Helen is a light-filled force of nature full of inspiration, positivity, and profound wisdom. We hope you enjoy this rich, vibrant, and tender conversation with Helen and Drew.
More about Helen Valleau:
As a certified HeartMath facilitator and long-standing Supervising Teacher with the Hoffman Institute, Helen helps others shed old stories, heal emotional wounds, and awaken to a more vibrant, heart-aligned life. Her inspirational books, A Year of Possibilities and 100 Minutes of Inspiration, offer daily nourishment for the soul—reminders that every stage of life holds the potential for joy, creativity, and reinvention. Her forthcoming work, Inner Power Aging, promises to deepen this journey, guiding readers to discover the strength, freedom, and fulfillment that come with embracing age as a sacred evolution.
Rooted in Toronto, Helen shares her voice through writing, teaching, and social media—inviting others to walk boldly into each new chapter with passion, purpose, and self-love. Her work is a call to live fully, love deeply, and age elegantly—from the inside out.
Follow Helen on Instagram.
As mentioned in this episode:
Edmonton, Alberta
Corporate Pilots/Bush Pilots
Canada's Aviation Hall of Fame
Tim Laurence, Hoffman UK founder and teacher
• Listen to Tim on the Hoffman Podcast
Emerson Theological Institute
Quantum Physics
Hoffman Expression Work
Hoffman Process - Compassion
Homeopathy
Science of Mind, or Religious Science
• New Thought
• Center for Spiritual Living
Affirmative Prayer
HeartMath Training
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
The idea of it is obvious and it's
everywhere. Right? People talk about loving themselves.
Be kind to yourself, self care, all this
stuff. But until you actually tap into that
place within yourself
that is eternally
loving
unconditionally
and you feel it and embody it, you
(00:23):
don't know what it feels like.
Welcome, everybody. My name is Drew Horning, and
this podcast is called Love's Everyday Radius.
It's brought to you by the Hoffman Institute,
and it's stories and anecdotes
and people we interview
about their life post process and how it
lives in the world radiating love.
(00:50):
Hey, everybody. Welcome to the Hoffman Podcast
special guest today. Welcome, Helen.
Thank you for having me, Drew.
Helen Vello, Hoffman teacher extraordinaire.
Helen,
what is
this anniversary coming up here in the fall?
Oh, in November, it will be thirty years
of me teaching the Hoffman process.
(01:11):
Wow.
I know. Who stays in a position for
thirty years anymore?
You've got some wisdom, some perspective.
What has it been like to be a
Hoffman Process teacher
for thirty
years?
I mean, it's an honor. It's a privilege.
It's
a lifelong calling of service.
(01:32):
I love the people I teach with. I'm
inspired and learn
from not only the other teachers, but from
every single participant that walks through the door.
You know, it's a little bit quirky. It's
a little bit
different than your normal
career and position
of work.
(01:54):
It is kind of a unique thing to
shepherd people through this experience.
It is.
You know, the one thing about the process,
I'm always in awe of the power of
spirit and
how people heal, what they glean from the
process, and what they do with their lives
afterwards.
(02:14):
Yeah. You know, I was thinking about this.
Like, we're so lucky that the people who
come to the process
are ready. They're committed.
You know, maybe they've tried other things that
haven't worked well, but by the time they
come to Hoffman, we really have a group
of dedicated students week after week, don't we?
We do. And I think that's changed actually
(02:34):
over the years because when I started teaching,
there wasn't a lot of professional or personal
development.
So people came in a little more guarded
and
with a prove it to me attitude,
really wanting to
to get the healing, but still skeptical. Whereas
(02:54):
now, because there's so many modalities of healing
and people have done a lot of different
things, by the time they come to Hoffman,
they're ready to dive in deep to their
childhood patterns and really take a look at
that. Wow. That is interesting.
The different types
available to people,
it's almost made what we do at Hoffman
(03:16):
more normal. A lot more normal
and palatable.
You know, I'm also
always
impressed
and surprised
by
how
people who've done all these different modalities
are still
walking away from Hoffman going,
I had no idea.
(03:36):
This is incredible.
This is what I was looking for. Not
to diss other modalities because they're awesome. But
Yeah. It's almost like this is what I've
been looking for, but there's also this sense
sometimes that, oh my god. I didn't even
know this was available.
I had someone,
a daughter of a friend,
say to my daughter,
(03:57):
I had no idea that that kind of
self love was even available.
It was cool. It is. It's inspiring.
So how did you get to the process?
You live in Toronto. You've taught in Canada.
And then over the last couple of years,
you've come down to The US. Now you're
a US faculty member as well.
And how did you get to the process
(04:18):
some thirty plus years ago?
Through a friend.
He told me he was going to do
this big process, and I went, great. That's
good. You really need to do something for
yourself.
I'd been in therapy. I thought I had
it all together.
And then
when he came back from the process, I
spoke to him on the phone. He was
(04:39):
so
different.
And I said to him, how can I
do this?
So
he did his process in February of ninety
two.
I
signed up for March of ninety two.
Wow.
There was no Zoom, so you could just
hear it in his voice. I could hear
it in his voice.
(04:59):
I could
feel the shift in him. There was a
calmness of presence, a clarity
that,
wait a minute. I've been doing therapy.
I've been traveling all over the world. I've
been giving myself all these experiences
looking for that.
I want it. Fantastic.
(05:20):
And so you go to your process
and you digest some of your childhood stuff.
Share a little bit about the unique experiences
you grew up under and how the process
sorta helped you navigate that.
So I grew up in Edmonton, Alberta, and
my parents were
in their early forties when they had me.
(05:40):
They were both known as
corporate pilots and bush pilots, so they did
a lot of flying in the Arctic under
extreme positions. And I was the only child
in the sixties and seventies who had a
mother who had a career.
She loved
to fly. She was
one of the few women that really
(06:01):
dared to dream really big and follow her
heart and her passion,
which is, you know, what she imprinted on
me, absolutely.
She always said to me, think for yourself.
Don't follow the crowd. You can be anything
you wanna be. Follow your heart.
And she modeled it, and she was very
accomplished in what she did. She was the
(06:24):
woman to be invested in Canada's Aviation Hall
of Fame and a recipient of the of
the Amelia Earhart award and
very, very esteemed as one of the Canadian
female pilots back in the sixties and seventies.
So, yeah, it was a very different childhood.
She was really tough. We fought a lot.
You know, I wanted the more feminine side.
(06:46):
She was like, no. You're gonna be tough
and strong. And
so, you know, we were at loggerheads. And
then, you know, when I was 13,
she was diagnosed with inoperable
colon cancer.
So my dad came home and said she's
not going to make it through the night,
and I didn't believe him.
(07:07):
She did make it through the night, but
she didn't only just survive.
She went on to do some experimental
cancer treatments, which back in the seventies, not
many people had cancer the way it's so
prolific in our society now.
And then she decided she was going to
do a lot of alternative healing.
So she did acupuncture
(07:28):
and nutrition and threw out all of the
refined food in our house, and we went
very organic and clean.
Yeah. She just embraced everything alternative.
And so she went on this healing journey,
and she actually
did get her pilot's license back when I
was 16, which is
a phenomenal feat because you have to have
(07:50):
a very clean bill of health in order
to get your license back. So it was
an incredible
experience to witness her
determination
in
firstly getting back to flying. I mean, that
that was her number one goal for sure.
She loved to fly. Absolutely.
It was about three years later when I
(08:12):
was just about 18, 19.
She had some calcium deposits that grew around
her spinal cord, and it left her as
a paraplegic.
She refused to accept it. She kept
looking for ways to heal, looking for ways
to walk again. You know? She wanted to
get back to flying. And
then I remember a pivotal moment
(08:34):
just before my twentieth birthday where she said,
that's it. I'm done. I want to die.
She had a
she started throwing everything out of the dishwasher,
and she was done. She got angry and
said, I can't do this anymore.
I remember thinking,
are we not enough for you to live
for?
(08:54):
That really struck me. It was like, oh
my god. I'm not enough
for you to want to live.
And I remember
she had gone to a room, and she
was in a wheelchair by that point, and
she got herself into bed. And
I remember lying there with her, and I'm
thinking,
God, if I'm just like you, mom, maybe
(09:14):
then maybe then I'm enough for you to
live for. Maybe I'll get to hear the
words I love you.
I'll be just like you.
Of course, I never did hear those words.
Right?
You know, she died a few months later,
and two things from that was,
one, I saw the power of choice. I
mean, she really made that choice. She was
(09:35):
she was done. She was ready to die.
Number two, it was
she was done with suffering, which was a
great thing, but but we weren't enough.
And so I think
that imprinting
left me with a tremendous amount of pain,
a tremendous amount of
(09:56):
confusion,
and
the
determination
to try to emulate her.
But it didn't work, of course. In my
twenties, I was so dysfunctionally
independent,
tough, scrappy,
fighting with everyone and everything.
(10:16):
And so I think by the time I
got to the process, I was 32,
I was ready. I was ready to just
lay it all out and be done with
it
because I knew I was messing up my
life. I knew I was messing up relationships.
I knew that instinctively
and through therapy that there was a lot
of pain there.
(10:36):
Such a clear timeline and understanding
of life
preprocess,
and then you step into the process. And
what did the Hoffman process experience do
that therapy
couldn't or wasn't doing for you? Well, of
all, the expression work.
I hyperventilated
(10:58):
for the few rounds of the expression work
of the bashing.
I couldn't get that energy moving.
I remember
Tim Lawrence coming up to me. He was
a teacher in my process, and he just
looked at me and he said, Helen,
breathe.
I I just sort of let go, and
that was it. I had
(11:18):
so many
bottled up emotions
that I needed to let go and express.
And so the expression work was amazing for
that.
The compassion
work was
interesting
and different for me. of all, I wasn't
used to opening up my heart, that was
a little jolting for me and a little
(11:39):
bit of a push pull, am I really
gonna open up my heart?
And then by the time
it was over and I was processing everything,
I realized I was feeling a peace around
my parents that I hadn't felt before, and
a peace within myself.
One of the things about the process is,
you know, healing isn't always graceful.
(12:00):
It's raw,
it's those
breathless songs.
It's sadness, it's grief, it's fear,
roaring through the body.
You know, I was willing to let it
all rise and let it all go.
From
that, I knew I was on a different
trajectory in my life.
That's beautiful. And you can still remember it
(12:23):
now some
thirty one years later, can't you? Yeah. It's
thirty three years, Drew.
Thirty three years.
Yes. Yes. I can take myself back to
specific moments
in my process. I can remember who was
there. I remember the faces.
I remember the energy of the group. I
remember where I was, what it looked like.
(12:46):
It's etched in my heart. That's for sure.
And why do you think that kind of
thing gets etched in your heart
33
later? Like, what is it that makes it
so memorable?
Well, it really did
shift me into this place of I can
love myself for who I am.
I didn't have to live up to my
(13:07):
parents' expectations.
I didn't have to live up to who
they were and their accomplishments.
I could be myself.
I could start to enjoy myself, I could
let go
and laugh and have fun.
I was pretty intense and focused and
determined and tough. So
(13:27):
to let that go is a huge relief.
Absolutely.
But also,
I think there's something that aligned
at that time
in my life that brought me to the
process
that
gave me the experience it gave me
to then move me into
(13:50):
really changing my life,
opening up to love and receiving love from
others,
and then moving into teaching the process.
The process has so many sacred moments in
it. I don't think anybody can walk away
and
forget
those profound moments
(14:11):
of healing and the richness of self love
and compassion and peace and joy
and the lightness of being.
It wasn't an intellectual journey. It was emotional,
and it was energetic
and physical.
You know? So it it gets in our
bones.
It gets into us on a cellular level.
(14:33):
Wow. I got goosebumps.
So you come out of the process,
and what happens? Like, what did the process
lead you towards in your life? Teaching, but
wasn't there partnership as well in there?
Literally, the Monday after my process,
(14:54):
Derek, my now husband of thirty one years,
walks into my office, we had been friends,
he had been in a relationship,
he was not my type so to speak,
but he walks into my office and he
says, I'm single. And I looked at him
and I said,
I'm ready.
I knew that I was ready for a
(15:15):
relationship.
I knew that he is one of the
kindest,
most
respectful people of human beings that I've ever
met. I witnessed that in him and how
he treated people,
which I deeply appreciated and loved in him.
Yeah. Our date was 04/01/1992.
(15:37):
April Foothills' Day. Yeah. And we've been together
ever since. So
Wow. And there is a correlation between being
ready
to be with Derek, being ready for partnership,
and what transpired in the process that helped
you be ready?
Absolutely.
Because I had been
pushing away relationships
(15:59):
or
being attracted to unavailable people
because I couldn't get close I couldn't get
close to myself I couldn't get close to
anybody else
I would pick up and move I would
move you know from Montreal to Toronto to
Vancouver to back to Edmonton I was I'm
like, here, take my stuff. I don't care.
Yeah. I'm moving.
(16:19):
I'm off on a new adventure, and then
I was off on travels. I was, like,
doing everything
to not be in relationship with myself
or with anybody else.
You know, and I think back on that
with also some guilt and some shame because
I think I also hurt people who really
loved and cared about me and they're like,
(16:41):
why is she leaving?
I I didn't care. I sabotaged everything.
So to know that
I could
stand in the fullness of myself and receive
receive intimacy from other people, receive friendship, receive
relationship
because I have this new relationship with myself,
(17:03):
and I knew I was worth having it.
Yeah. I mean, I could tell you or
someone could tell you before the process,
really, what you're gonna get out of this
is a better, more loving relationship with yourself.
So just go ahead and love yourself.
That wouldn't work, would it? We'd have to
go through the process to actually get that
(17:23):
loving relationship with ourselves even though the idea
of it
is obvious.
The idea of it is obvious, and it's
everywhere.
Right? People talk about loving themselves.
You know, be kind to yourself, self care,
all this stuff. But until you actually tap
into
that place within yourself,
(17:44):
that is eternally
loving,
unconditionally,
and you feel it and embody it,
you don't know what it feels like.
It's impossible.
And I mean, that's what the process gave
me. I had no idea.
Just like your friend's daughter
said, I had no idea. I had no
(18:05):
idea that I had this
essence of eternal love and grace and wisdom
and peace
within me.
And so you married Derek, you have a
daughter Mahala,
and you become a process teacher. Like, take
us through these next chapters in your life.
(18:26):
Yeah. That was crazy. I did a lot
at once, which is part of my personality
anyways, as you know, Drew. But, yes, I
had this baby.
I was actually in homeopathy
school.
I was doing teacher training
and then being part of a relationship
all at once. So it was a bit
of a juggling act. I was really blessed
(18:47):
that Derek's parents
were able to
be present and
be available when I was away during training
and later on teaching.
It was crazy, but you know what? That's
what healing does. It opens the door to
things that you would never imagine
that, you know, new possibilities.
That's interesting. Healing opens the door to things
(19:10):
that you would never have imagined
prior to the healing.
Absolutely.
Uh-huh.
And you kept opening doors, and then later
on, you became
a minister. Can you just talk about that
journey?
Yes. So
when Mahala turned 13,
I realized
(19:30):
that I didn't have a mom when I
was 13.
She was fighting for her life.
I thought, oh my gosh. I don't want
Mahala
to experience the same loss in her teenage
years that I did. I should stay home
and be a mom.
And it lasted seven months.
(19:50):
I drove her crazy. She said, please go
back to work, mom. I'm not used to
you being home all the time.
But during that time, I also found some
classes
in science of mind, new thought. And I
remember
because I needed to do something.
I walked into this place in Toronto called
the Center for Spiritual Living
(20:11):
and the minister
spoke affirmative prayer and I
I felt something go through me and I
went okay I need to understand this. I
was not raised in religion.
I
don't
know much about it, but I knew that
this form of prayer was something that I
(20:31):
could
feel inside of me. So I wanted to
know. So I started taking classes. I became
a licensed spiritual practitioner,
went on to ministerial
school, became a licensed minister.
I eventually
ran the center for three years and then
just after COVID I said,
my time is done, I need to pass
it on to somebody else.
(20:53):
But it was
one of the greatest learning experiences
of
how healing
happens
and understanding
that we are such powerful beings if we
open ourselves up to our own inner power.
So I loved it. I think that the
teachings have enhanced my own teaching at Hoffman,
(21:14):
in my faith and trust in the power
of spirit.
I went on to get my doctorate in
consciousness studies at the Emerson Theological Institute,
which was really understanding
also quantum physics and how the universe works,
so which I love. It's all connected.
There's no separation from what we do at
Hoffman to what happens
(21:37):
in the, power of healing and other modalities.
It's all one. It's just how we approach
it.
So I was busy.
Alan, jeez.
I'm I had no idea of some of
this stuff. That's incredible.
Lots of energy, lots of motion,
and Mahala gets a little break from an
(21:57):
intense mom.
Yeah.
She does.
She actually went on to do the process
in The UK
about three years ago.
And
she lives with you now, so you guys
have a beautiful relationship.
We do. We do. Our our family is
very important to us, and
we feel very blessed that we have the
(22:19):
family we do for sure. We'll add a
bunch of this stuff in the show notes
and put some links for people to check
out some of these things you talked about.
But there's something I just wanna go back
to, this idea of affirmative prayer,
and that being kind of the doorway for
you into this
deeper exploration of religion and science of mind.
(22:42):
So can you just help us understand
what is affirmative prayer,
and how might people do it in their
lives?
Affirmative prayer is
affirming
that there is this infinite presence of
light and love that is omniscient, omnipotent,
(23:02):
omnipresent,
and that that is what we are.
We are this light, we are this love
from that place, opening up just as we
set intentions in the process, we do visioning
in the process,
it's
then affirming,
yes.
I am
this abundant being who is creating
(23:26):
a life that is filled with presence and
grace and love,
peace, whatever it is we want.
And knowing that as we set our intention,
as we focus our mind on it, and
as we speak it, it is done.
It's done. We have put that out into
the universe.
And so it is.
(23:47):
Yeah.
And when people do that, they can begin
to breathe in
and be that abundance. Is that part of
what happens?
That's the idea is you are embodying this.
You are
this idea breathing it in so that it
becomes a living vibration
(24:07):
within your own system,
which is fantastic. I mean, it's still aligned
to what we teach.
Who wouldn't want that? A living vibration
within your own system.
Yes.
Beautiful teachings.
They're considered new thought teachings. They pull from
all the religions.
That
one belief that is done unto you is
(24:28):
you believe
you are love, you are light, you are
power, that sense of being you want to
embody.
So that's wonderful. So do you still attend
occasionally?
No. I'll watch online sometimes.
I'll watch different people around the world that
I like to tune into, but
I kind of went, okay. I'm done. And
(24:49):
when I'm done, I'm done. And I'm back
in Hoffman full time, so that's
a big part of my life. I also
went on to do heart math training,
which is also weaved and integrated into my
teachings. It's part of my life.
Wow. How does Derek keep up with you?
He's busy in his own business, so
(25:11):
I don't think he needs to keep up
to me. He just rolls with it. So
you did talk about going back to full
time, and we're growing so much now. So
all teachers on deck, so to speak.
But what is it like for you? I'm
kinda curious.
Here's my question. What do you notice
inside you
(25:32):
as you lead people through the process? Can
you feel
your own inner life
being affected
by this process experience and by the students
in that process experience?
I don't know if it's so much affected
as opposed to affirmed.
(25:52):
It affirms
my faith and trust in
our own spirit,
the the presence of the universe, the goodness
of the universe,
and also
the goodness
of human beings.
I love human beings. They're fascinating,
(26:14):
Complex,
annoying sometimes, but fascinating.
You know, essentially, I do believe that we
all have this goodness within us.
You know? It gets covered over by patterns.
And that can be a radical idea. I
mean, there's some people who believe that
at our core, we are evil or
the idea of original sin.
(26:36):
All we see in people are those patterns,
so we have a hard time seeing the
goodness underneath them or the goodness underneath ourselves.
But you're really saying that that's not true,
that that goodness is there.
Yes. I believe it is. Yeah.
Absolutely. I've I've so much faith in that.
I think that's our work to do is
(26:57):
to get beyond the seeing people and their
patterns.
And not to say it's not challenging, Drew.
It can be very challenging.
But life is a mirror, so whatever I'm
seeing in somebody else is a reflection of
me and what what do I need to
look at within myself?
Because we're multidimensional.
We're not just made up of one or
(27:18):
two qualities.
We have everything within us.
It's all
there. It's what do we choose to focus
on.
For the next chapter, Helen,
you
are
starting yet another business. Can you share a
little bit about what's next for you in
this aging
journey?
Yes. I'm starting
(27:39):
getting there.
Launching Elegant Aging, which
again
is
as I also turned 65 in November,
I look at my life and I go,
okay, well, I'm not done yet. I'm not
done with Hoffman, but I'm also not done
creating.
For me, aging is also an inside job.
It's a time to really deepen connection to
(28:01):
spirit.
Maybe about twenty years ago, somebody said to
me, it was someone who was
older than me and with a lot of
bitterness that this too will happen to you.
And I thought, I don't want to feel
bitterness.
I don't want to feel resentful
in my life
or feel invisible
(28:21):
because
I'm aging.
It's like, wait a minute here.
We don't stop
at a certain age. We don't stop expanding.
We don't stop exploring, we don't stop living
until we actually leave our bodies on this
earth plane. So I just thought okay I
want
to create something that's
(28:42):
a movement,
a conscious choice
to embrace the fullness of life while we
age with grace, vitality,
purpose,
and deepen
into our wisdom
and radiate beauty from the inside out.
Yeah.
To do aging differently than that kind of
stereotypical
(29:03):
bitterness
that creeps in as people come towards the
last chapters of their lives.
I want to challenge the traditional beliefs about
aging.
I don't think they have to be the
guiding force in our life.
You feel like teaching the process keeps you
young?
Absolutely.
I love it. Because what again, I meet
(29:26):
all kinds of people, I learn,
I stay open and curious,
I love our colleagues
because they're all different ages,
nationalities
and they come with different skill sets and
different ways of thinking and being,
so I get to learn from them.
(29:47):
Yeah. And staying open and curious and being
open to learning is
key in terms of aging.
Yeah. That's maybe what keeps people young, that
openness and curiosity.
Yeah. Not buying into the traditional belief that
I have to retire at a certain age
and that I'm no longer relevant
and I have nothing left to give.
(30:09):
Oh,
yeah.
Helen, what's it like to
reflect
on your life? You started with your mom
and her story and your parents as Bush
Pilots and sort of took us through to
your process and Derek and your marriage
and teaching
and then on up to the work you're
doing now. What do you notice in the
(30:31):
sharing of all that? Oh, that's an interesting
question, Drew.
What do I notice? I notice a fullness
and richness of life
and an embracing
of life and saying yes to it. I'm
always up for the adventure.
It's like, okay, give me a new adventure.
I'll say yes to it. Absolutely.
(30:52):
You are I have to say, in my
experience over the years teaching with you, you
are a yes.
Like, when I see your face, when I
see your energy,
you have this, like, yes on your face.
What are we doing next?
Yeah. I think I actually get that from
my dad.
My dad was very much that way and
was always doing something new,
always learning, always growing
(31:14):
right up until he passed. Imagine that's a
good way to go. It is. Yeah.
Well, Helen, I'm grateful for this conversation. Thank
you.
Oh, you're welcome. I'm grateful
for
you nudging me
to do this.
We can share that this has been many
years in the making, hasn't it?
(31:37):
It has. It has. And I want to
say that the integration
of Canada
with The US
is one of the most joyful things for
me right now
to have this cross pollination.
I give so much credit to Peter Maureen
Colossa for bringing Hoffman Canada to Canada,
(32:00):
but now to see it
so
grounded,
solid, steady,
embraced
in the love
that
the US team
and organization
supports The US but supporting Canada in the
same way
(32:20):
just warms my heart to no end. It's
so good for our graduates,
it's so good for new participants
coming in
to feel that love and care and nurturance
from the institute. So I just wanna say
I'm thankful for that. Yeah. And Hoffman Canada
is adding
weeks every year, aren't they? You're humming along
(32:41):
up there, aren't you? We are, and I
think we are now actually booked
until the end of the year.
It's a fullness that is
really
solid and
steeped in
love and care. So I'm I'm very happy
about that. I think you speak to something
that's interesting behind the scenes, which is the
(33:03):
institute
that supports the process
is really important. The people that work for
it, the organization,
the structure
that undergirds
this whole process experience
needs to be
a functioning positive organization, doesn't it? It does,
and it is. And I feel very honored
(33:24):
to be a part of that. Thank you,
Helen. Thank you, Drew.
Thank you for listening to our podcast. My
name is Liza Ingrassi. I'm the CEO and
president of Hoffman Institute Foundation.
And I'm Razi Ingrassi,
(33:44):
Hoffman teacher and founder of the Hoffman Institute
Foundation.
Our mission is to provide people greater access
to the wisdom and power of love. In
themselves, in each other and in the world.
To find out more, please go to hompaninstitute.org.
The idea of it is obvious and it's
everywhere. Right? People talk about loving themselves.
Be kind to yourself, self care, all this
stuff. But until you actually tap into that
place within yourself
that is eternally
loving
unconditionally
and you feel it and embody it, you
(00:23):
don't know what it feels like.
Welcome, everybody. My name is Drew Horning, and
this podcast is called Love's Everyday Radius.
It's brought to you by the Hoffman Institute,
and it's stories and anecdotes
and people we interview
about their life post process and how it
lives in the world radiating love.
(00:50):
Hey, everybody. Welcome to the Hoffman Podcast
special guest today. Welcome, Helen.
Thank you for having me, Drew.
Helen Vello, Hoffman teacher extraordinaire.
Helen,
what is
this anniversary coming up here in the fall?
Oh, in November, it will be thirty years
of me teaching the Hoffman process.
(01:11):
Wow.
I know. Who stays in a position for
thirty years anymore?
You've got some wisdom, some perspective.
What has it been like to be a
Hoffman Process teacher
for thirty
years?
I mean, it's an honor. It's a privilege.
It's
a lifelong calling of service.
(01:32):
I love the people I teach with. I'm
inspired and learn
from not only the other teachers, but from
every single participant that walks through the door.
You know, it's a little bit quirky. It's
a little bit
different than your normal
career and position
of work.
(01:54):
It is kind of a unique thing to
shepherd people through this experience.
It is.
You know, the one thing about the process,
I'm always in awe of the power of
spirit and
how people heal, what they glean from the
process, and what they do with their lives
afterwards.
(02:14):
Yeah. You know, I was thinking about this.
Like, we're so lucky that the people who
come to the process
are ready. They're committed.
You know, maybe they've tried other things that
haven't worked well, but by the time they
come to Hoffman, we really have a group
of dedicated students week after week, don't we?
We do. And I think that's changed actually
(02:34):
over the years because when I started teaching,
there wasn't a lot of professional or personal
development.
So people came in a little more guarded
and
with a prove it to me attitude,
really wanting to
to get the healing, but still skeptical. Whereas
(02:54):
now, because there's so many modalities of healing
and people have done a lot of different
things, by the time they come to Hoffman,
they're ready to dive in deep to their
childhood patterns and really take a look at
that. Wow. That is interesting.
The different types
available to people,
it's almost made what we do at Hoffman
(03:16):
more normal. A lot more normal
and palatable.
You know, I'm also
always
impressed
and surprised
by
how
people who've done all these different modalities
are still
walking away from Hoffman going,
I had no idea.
(03:36):
This is incredible.
This is what I was looking for. Not
to diss other modalities because they're awesome. But
Yeah. It's almost like this is what I've
been looking for, but there's also this sense
sometimes that, oh my god. I didn't even
know this was available.
I had someone,
a daughter of a friend,
say to my daughter,
(03:57):
I had no idea that that kind of
self love was even available.
It was cool. It is. It's inspiring.
So how did you get to the process?
You live in Toronto. You've taught in Canada.
And then over the last couple of years,
you've come down to The US. Now you're
a US faculty member as well.
And how did you get to the process
(04:18):
some thirty plus years ago?
Through a friend.
He told me he was going to do
this big process, and I went, great. That's
good. You really need to do something for
yourself.
I'd been in therapy. I thought I had
it all together.
And then
when he came back from the process, I
spoke to him on the phone. He was
(04:39):
so
different.
And I said to him, how can I
do this?
So
he did his process in February of ninety
two.
I
signed up for March of ninety two.
Wow.
There was no Zoom, so you could just
hear it in his voice. I could hear
it in his voice.
(04:59):
I could
feel the shift in him. There was a
calmness of presence, a clarity
that,
wait a minute. I've been doing therapy.
I've been traveling all over the world. I've
been giving myself all these experiences
looking for that.
I want it. Fantastic.
(05:20):
And so you go to your process
and you digest some of your childhood stuff.
Share a little bit about the unique experiences
you grew up under and how the process
sorta helped you navigate that.
So I grew up in Edmonton, Alberta, and
my parents were
in their early forties when they had me.
(05:40):
They were both known as
corporate pilots and bush pilots, so they did
a lot of flying in the Arctic under
extreme positions. And I was the only child
in the sixties and seventies who had a
mother who had a career.
She loved
to fly. She was
one of the few women that really
(06:01):
dared to dream really big and follow her
heart and her passion,
which is, you know, what she imprinted on
me, absolutely.
She always said to me, think for yourself.
Don't follow the crowd. You can be anything
you wanna be. Follow your heart.
And she modeled it, and she was very
accomplished in what she did. She was the
(06:24):
woman to be invested in Canada's Aviation Hall
of Fame and a recipient of the of
the Amelia Earhart award and
very, very esteemed as one of the Canadian
female pilots back in the sixties and seventies.
So, yeah, it was a very different childhood.
She was really tough. We fought a lot.
You know, I wanted the more feminine side.
(06:46):
She was like, no. You're gonna be tough
and strong. And
so, you know, we were at loggerheads. And
then, you know, when I was 13,
she was diagnosed with inoperable
colon cancer.
So my dad came home and said she's
not going to make it through the night,
and I didn't believe him.
(07:07):
She did make it through the night, but
she didn't only just survive.
She went on to do some experimental
cancer treatments, which back in the seventies, not
many people had cancer the way it's so
prolific in our society now.
And then she decided she was going to
do a lot of alternative healing.
So she did acupuncture
(07:28):
and nutrition and threw out all of the
refined food in our house, and we went
very organic and clean.
Yeah. She just embraced everything alternative.
And so she went on this healing journey,
and she actually
did get her pilot's license back when I
was 16, which is
a phenomenal feat because you have to have
(07:50):
a very clean bill of health in order
to get your license back. So it was
an incredible
experience to witness her
determination
in
firstly getting back to flying. I mean, that
that was her number one goal for sure.
She loved to fly. Absolutely.
It was about three years later when I
(08:12):
was just about 18, 19.
She had some calcium deposits that grew around
her spinal cord, and it left her as
a paraplegic.
She refused to accept it. She kept
looking for ways to heal, looking for ways
to walk again. You know? She wanted to
get back to flying. And
then I remember a pivotal moment
(08:34):
just before my twentieth birthday where she said,
that's it. I'm done. I want to die.
She had a
she started throwing everything out of the dishwasher,
and she was done. She got angry and
said, I can't do this anymore.
I remember thinking,
are we not enough for you to live
for?
(08:54):
That really struck me. It was like, oh
my god. I'm not enough
for you to want to live.
And I remember
she had gone to a room, and she
was in a wheelchair by that point, and
she got herself into bed. And
I remember lying there with her, and I'm
thinking,
God, if I'm just like you, mom, maybe
(09:14):
then maybe then I'm enough for you to
live for. Maybe I'll get to hear the
words I love you.
I'll be just like you.
Of course, I never did hear those words.
Right?
You know, she died a few months later,
and two things from that was,
one, I saw the power of choice. I
mean, she really made that choice. She was
(09:35):
she was done. She was ready to die.
Number two, it was
she was done with suffering, which was a
great thing, but but we weren't enough.
And so I think
that imprinting
left me with a tremendous amount of pain,
a tremendous amount of
(09:56):
confusion,
and
the
determination
to try to emulate her.
But it didn't work, of course. In my
twenties, I was so dysfunctionally
independent,
tough, scrappy,
fighting with everyone and everything.
(10:16):
And so I think by the time I
got to the process, I was 32,
I was ready. I was ready to just
lay it all out and be done with
it
because I knew I was messing up my
life. I knew I was messing up relationships.
I knew that instinctively
and through therapy that there was a lot
of pain there.
(10:36):
Such a clear timeline and understanding
of life
preprocess,
and then you step into the process. And
what did the Hoffman process experience do
that therapy
couldn't or wasn't doing for you? Well, of
all, the expression work.
I hyperventilated
(10:58):
for the few rounds of the expression work
of the bashing.
I couldn't get that energy moving.
I remember
Tim Lawrence coming up to me. He was
a teacher in my process, and he just
looked at me and he said, Helen,
breathe.
I I just sort of let go, and
that was it. I had
(11:18):
so many
bottled up emotions
that I needed to let go and express.
And so the expression work was amazing for
that.
The compassion
work was
interesting
and different for me. of all, I wasn't
used to opening up my heart, that was
a little jolting for me and a little
(11:39):
bit of a push pull, am I really
gonna open up my heart?
And then by the time
it was over and I was processing everything,
I realized I was feeling a peace around
my parents that I hadn't felt before, and
a peace within myself.
One of the things about the process is,
you know, healing isn't always graceful.
(12:00):
It's raw,
it's those
breathless songs.
It's sadness, it's grief, it's fear,
roaring through the body.
You know, I was willing to let it
all rise and let it all go.
From
that, I knew I was on a different
trajectory in my life.
That's beautiful. And you can still remember it
(12:23):
now some
thirty one years later, can't you? Yeah. It's
thirty three years, Drew.
Thirty three years.
Yes. Yes. I can take myself back to
specific moments
in my process. I can remember who was
there. I remember the faces.
I remember the energy of the group. I
remember where I was, what it looked like.
(12:46):
It's etched in my heart. That's for sure.
And why do you think that kind of
thing gets etched in your heart
33
later? Like, what is it that makes it
so memorable?
Well, it really did
shift me into this place of I can
love myself for who I am.
I didn't have to live up to my
(13:07):
parents' expectations.
I didn't have to live up to who
they were and their accomplishments.
I could be myself.
I could start to enjoy myself, I could
let go
and laugh and have fun.
I was pretty intense and focused and
determined and tough. So
(13:27):
to let that go is a huge relief.
Absolutely.
But also,
I think there's something that aligned
at that time
in my life that brought me to the
process
that
gave me the experience it gave me
to then move me into
(13:50):
really changing my life,
opening up to love and receiving love from
others,
and then moving into teaching the process.
The process has so many sacred moments in
it. I don't think anybody can walk away
and
forget
those profound moments
(14:11):
of healing and the richness of self love
and compassion and peace and joy
and the lightness of being.
It wasn't an intellectual journey. It was emotional,
and it was energetic
and physical.
You know? So it it gets in our
bones.
It gets into us on a cellular level.
(14:33):
Wow. I got goosebumps.
So you come out of the process,
and what happens? Like, what did the process
lead you towards in your life? Teaching, but
wasn't there partnership as well in there?
Literally, the Monday after my process,
(14:54):
Derek, my now husband of thirty one years,
walks into my office, we had been friends,
he had been in a relationship,
he was not my type so to speak,
but he walks into my office and he
says, I'm single. And I looked at him
and I said,
I'm ready.
I knew that I was ready for a
(15:15):
relationship.
I knew that he is one of the
kindest,
most
respectful people of human beings that I've ever
met. I witnessed that in him and how
he treated people,
which I deeply appreciated and loved in him.
Yeah. Our date was 04/01/1992.
(15:37):
April Foothills' Day. Yeah. And we've been together
ever since. So
Wow. And there is a correlation between being
ready
to be with Derek, being ready for partnership,
and what transpired in the process that helped
you be ready?
Absolutely.
Because I had been
pushing away relationships
(15:59):
or
being attracted to unavailable people
because I couldn't get close I couldn't get
close to myself I couldn't get close to
anybody else
I would pick up and move I would
move you know from Montreal to Toronto to
Vancouver to back to Edmonton I was I'm
like, here, take my stuff. I don't care.
Yeah. I'm moving.
(16:19):
I'm off on a new adventure, and then
I was off on travels. I was, like,
doing everything
to not be in relationship with myself
or with anybody else.
You know, and I think back on that
with also some guilt and some shame because
I think I also hurt people who really
loved and cared about me and they're like,
(16:41):
why is she leaving?
I I didn't care. I sabotaged everything.
So to know that
I could
stand in the fullness of myself and receive
receive intimacy from other people, receive friendship, receive
relationship
because I have this new relationship with myself,
(17:03):
and I knew I was worth having it.
Yeah. I mean, I could tell you or
someone could tell you before the process,
really, what you're gonna get out of this
is a better, more loving relationship with yourself.
So just go ahead and love yourself.
That wouldn't work, would it? We'd have to
go through the process to actually get that
(17:23):
loving relationship with ourselves even though the idea
of it
is obvious.
The idea of it is obvious, and it's
everywhere.
Right? People talk about loving themselves.
You know, be kind to yourself, self care,
all this stuff. But until you actually tap
into
that place within yourself,
(17:44):
that is eternally
loving,
unconditionally,
and you feel it and embody it,
you don't know what it feels like.
It's impossible.
And I mean, that's what the process gave
me. I had no idea.
Just like your friend's daughter
said, I had no idea. I had no
(18:05):
idea that I had this
essence of eternal love and grace and wisdom
and peace
within me.
And so you married Derek, you have a
daughter Mahala,
and you become a process teacher. Like, take
us through these next chapters in your life.
(18:26):
Yeah. That was crazy. I did a lot
at once, which is part of my personality
anyways, as you know, Drew. But, yes, I
had this baby.
I was actually in homeopathy
school.
I was doing teacher training
and then being part of a relationship
all at once. So it was a bit
of a juggling act. I was really blessed
(18:47):
that Derek's parents
were able to
be present and
be available when I was away during training
and later on teaching.
It was crazy, but you know what? That's
what healing does. It opens the door to
things that you would never imagine
that, you know, new possibilities.
That's interesting. Healing opens the door to things
(19:10):
that you would never have imagined
prior to the healing.
Absolutely.
Uh-huh.
And you kept opening doors, and then later
on, you became
a minister. Can you just talk about that
journey?
Yes. So
when Mahala turned 13,
I realized
(19:30):
that I didn't have a mom when I
was 13.
She was fighting for her life.
I thought, oh my gosh. I don't want
Mahala
to experience the same loss in her teenage
years that I did. I should stay home
and be a mom.
And it lasted seven months.
(19:50):
I drove her crazy. She said, please go
back to work, mom. I'm not used to
you being home all the time.
But during that time, I also found some
classes
in science of mind, new thought. And I
remember
because I needed to do something.
I walked into this place in Toronto called
the Center for Spiritual Living
(20:11):
and the minister
spoke affirmative prayer and I
I felt something go through me and I
went okay I need to understand this. I
was not raised in religion.
I
don't
know much about it, but I knew that
this form of prayer was something that I
(20:31):
could
feel inside of me. So I wanted to
know. So I started taking classes. I became
a licensed spiritual practitioner,
went on to ministerial
school, became a licensed minister.
I eventually
ran the center for three years and then
just after COVID I said,
my time is done, I need to pass
it on to somebody else.
(20:53):
But it was
one of the greatest learning experiences
of
how healing
happens
and understanding
that we are such powerful beings if we
open ourselves up to our own inner power.
So I loved it. I think that the
teachings have enhanced my own teaching at Hoffman,
(21:14):
in my faith and trust in the power
of spirit.
I went on to get my doctorate in
consciousness studies at the Emerson Theological Institute,
which was really understanding
also quantum physics and how the universe works,
so which I love. It's all connected.
There's no separation from what we do at
Hoffman to what happens
(21:37):
in the, power of healing and other modalities.
It's all one. It's just how we approach
it.
So I was busy.
Alan, jeez.
I'm I had no idea of some of
this stuff. That's incredible.
Lots of energy, lots of motion,
and Mahala gets a little break from an
(21:57):
intense mom.
Yeah.
She does.
She actually went on to do the process
in The UK
about three years ago.
And
she lives with you now, so you guys
have a beautiful relationship.
We do. We do. Our our family is
very important to us, and
we feel very blessed that we have the
(22:19):
family we do for sure. We'll add a
bunch of this stuff in the show notes
and put some links for people to check
out some of these things you talked about.
But there's something I just wanna go back
to, this idea of affirmative prayer,
and that being kind of the doorway for
you into this
deeper exploration of religion and science of mind.
(22:42):
So can you just help us understand
what is affirmative prayer,
and how might people do it in their
lives?
Affirmative prayer is
affirming
that there is this infinite presence of
light and love that is omniscient, omnipotent,
(23:02):
omnipresent,
and that that is what we are.
We are this light, we are this love
from that place, opening up just as we
set intentions in the process, we do visioning
in the process,
it's
then affirming,
yes.
I am
this abundant being who is creating
(23:26):
a life that is filled with presence and
grace and love,
peace, whatever it is we want.
And knowing that as we set our intention,
as we focus our mind on it, and
as we speak it, it is done.
It's done. We have put that out into
the universe.
And so it is.
(23:47):
Yeah.
And when people do that, they can begin
to breathe in
and be that abundance. Is that part of
what happens?
That's the idea is you are embodying this.
You are
this idea breathing it in so that it
becomes a living vibration
(24:07):
within your own system,
which is fantastic. I mean, it's still aligned
to what we teach.
Who wouldn't want that? A living vibration
within your own system.
Yes.
Beautiful teachings.
They're considered new thought teachings. They pull from
all the religions.
That
one belief that is done unto you is
(24:28):
you believe
you are love, you are light, you are
power, that sense of being you want to
embody.
So that's wonderful. So do you still attend
occasionally?
No. I'll watch online sometimes.
I'll watch different people around the world that
I like to tune into, but
I kind of went, okay. I'm done. And
(24:49):
when I'm done, I'm done. And I'm back
in Hoffman full time, so that's
a big part of my life. I also
went on to do heart math training,
which is also weaved and integrated into my
teachings. It's part of my life.
Wow. How does Derek keep up with you?
He's busy in his own business, so
(25:11):
I don't think he needs to keep up
to me. He just rolls with it. So
you did talk about going back to full
time, and we're growing so much now. So
all teachers on deck, so to speak.
But what is it like for you? I'm
kinda curious.
Here's my question. What do you notice
inside you
(25:32):
as you lead people through the process? Can
you feel
your own inner life
being affected
by this process experience and by the students
in that process experience?
I don't know if it's so much affected
as opposed to affirmed.
(25:52):
It affirms
my faith and trust in
our own spirit,
the the presence of the universe, the goodness
of the universe,
and also
the goodness
of human beings.
I love human beings. They're fascinating,
(26:14):
Complex,
annoying sometimes, but fascinating.
You know, essentially, I do believe that we
all have this goodness within us.
You know? It gets covered over by patterns.
And that can be a radical idea. I
mean, there's some people who believe that
at our core, we are evil or
the idea of original sin.
(26:36):
All we see in people are those patterns,
so we have a hard time seeing the
goodness underneath them or the goodness underneath ourselves.
But you're really saying that that's not true,
that that goodness is there.
Yes. I believe it is. Yeah.
Absolutely. I've I've so much faith in that.
I think that's our work to do is
(26:57):
to get beyond the seeing people and their
patterns.
And not to say it's not challenging, Drew.
It can be very challenging.
But life is a mirror, so whatever I'm
seeing in somebody else is a reflection of
me and what what do I need to
look at within myself?
Because we're multidimensional.
We're not just made up of one or
(27:18):
two qualities.
We have everything within us.
It's all
there. It's what do we choose to focus
on.
For the next chapter, Helen,
you
are
starting yet another business. Can you share a
little bit about what's next for you in
this aging
journey?
Yes. I'm starting
(27:39):
getting there.
Launching Elegant Aging, which
again
is
as I also turned 65 in November,
I look at my life and I go,
okay, well, I'm not done yet. I'm not
done with Hoffman, but I'm also not done
creating.
For me, aging is also an inside job.
It's a time to really deepen connection to
(28:01):
spirit.
Maybe about twenty years ago, somebody said to
me, it was someone who was
older than me and with a lot of
bitterness that this too will happen to you.
And I thought, I don't want to feel
bitterness.
I don't want to feel resentful
in my life
or feel invisible
(28:21):
because
I'm aging.
It's like, wait a minute here.
We don't stop
at a certain age. We don't stop expanding.
We don't stop exploring, we don't stop living
until we actually leave our bodies on this
earth plane. So I just thought okay I
want
to create something that's
(28:42):
a movement,
a conscious choice
to embrace the fullness of life while we
age with grace, vitality,
purpose,
and deepen
into our wisdom
and radiate beauty from the inside out.
Yeah.
To do aging differently than that kind of
stereotypical
(29:03):
bitterness
that creeps in as people come towards the
last chapters of their lives.
I want to challenge the traditional beliefs about
aging.
I don't think they have to be the
guiding force in our life.
You feel like teaching the process keeps you
young?
Absolutely.
I love it. Because what again, I meet
(29:26):
all kinds of people, I learn,
I stay open and curious,
I love our colleagues
because they're all different ages,
nationalities
and they come with different skill sets and
different ways of thinking and being,
so I get to learn from them.
(29:47):
Yeah. And staying open and curious and being
open to learning is
key in terms of aging.
Yeah. That's maybe what keeps people young, that
openness and curiosity.
Yeah. Not buying into the traditional belief that
I have to retire at a certain age
and that I'm no longer relevant
and I have nothing left to give.
(30:09):
Oh,
yeah.
Helen, what's it like to
reflect
on your life? You started with your mom
and her story and your parents as Bush
Pilots and sort of took us through to
your process and Derek and your marriage
and teaching
and then on up to the work you're
doing now. What do you notice in the
(30:31):
sharing of all that? Oh, that's an interesting
question, Drew.
What do I notice? I notice a fullness
and richness of life
and an embracing
of life and saying yes to it. I'm
always up for the adventure.
It's like, okay, give me a new adventure.
I'll say yes to it. Absolutely.
(30:52):
You are I have to say, in my
experience over the years teaching with you, you
are a yes.
Like, when I see your face, when I
see your energy,
you have this, like, yes on your face.
What are we doing next?
Yeah. I think I actually get that from
my dad.
My dad was very much that way and
was always doing something new,
always learning, always growing
(31:14):
right up until he passed. Imagine that's a
good way to go. It is. Yeah.
Well, Helen, I'm grateful for this conversation. Thank
you.
Oh, you're welcome. I'm grateful
for
you nudging me
to do this.
We can share that this has been many
years in the making, hasn't it?
(31:37):
It has. It has. And I want to
say that the integration
of Canada
with The US
is one of the most joyful things for
me right now
to have this cross pollination.
I give so much credit to Peter Maureen
Colossa for bringing Hoffman Canada to Canada,
(32:00):
but now to see it
so
grounded,
solid, steady,
embraced
in the love
that
the US team
and organization
supports The US but supporting Canada in the
same way
(32:20):
just warms my heart to no end. It's
so good for our graduates,
it's so good for new participants
coming in
to feel that love and care and nurturance
from the institute. So I just wanna say
I'm thankful for that. Yeah. And Hoffman Canada
is adding
weeks every year, aren't they? You're humming along
(32:41):
up there, aren't you? We are, and I
think we are now actually booked
until the end of the year.
It's a fullness that is
really
solid and
steeped in
love and care. So I'm I'm very happy
about that. I think you speak to something
that's interesting behind the scenes, which is the
(33:03):
institute
that supports the process
is really important. The people that work for
it, the organization,
the structure
that undergirds
this whole process experience
needs to be
a functioning positive organization, doesn't it? It does,
and it is. And I feel very honored
(33:24):
to be a part of that. Thank you,
Helen. Thank you, Drew.
Thank you for listening to our podcast. My
name is Liza Ingrassi. I'm the CEO and
president of Hoffman Institute Foundation.
And I'm Razi Ingrassi,
(33:44):
Hoffman teacher and founder of the Hoffman Institute
Foundation.
Our mission is to provide people greater access
to the wisdom and power of love. In
themselves, in each other and in the world.
To find out more, please go to hompaninstitute.org.
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