Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Do you ever wake up
feeling like there's something
missing in your life?
Do you ever feel the need toescape your business?
Are you running your life or isyour life running you?
I'm Mike Kitko and I'll helpyou design and create a life so
authentic and aligned with whoyou really are that you'll get
excited just to wake up.
I'll help you create realwealth, success and freedom from
the inside out.
(00:23):
Welcome to the Inner WealthPodcast, where we learn and
choose to live inspired each andevery day.
I once had a speaking engagement, but I didn't know I was going
to have a speaking engagement.
I went to a meetup and one ofmy friends was having an
(00:48):
entrepreneur meetup and therewas going to be 100, 150 people
there and he was doing thismonthly and I went to support my
friend and when I walked in, Ijust walked up to him, gave him
a hug and I said, hey, man, I'mhere to support, let me know if
I can help.
And he goes.
He said, oh, you're, you'regoing to help, all right, you're
(01:09):
going to help and uh, and I'lllet you know when, when I need
you.
So I just like everybody elsethere, I went and grabbed the
seat and my wife was sittingnext to me and there's a good
group of people 100, 150 peopleprobably and he started the
conversation and he opened upthe dialogue this way.
(01:31):
He said you know, authenticityis a superpower, like the energy
of authenticity is the mostattractive quality and the most
attractive trait that anybody,the energy that anybody can
bring, like the frequency ofauthenticity, will dominate
(01:54):
anything that's not real andcrush it.
So tonight, our topic ofauthenticity, to make sure that
we are demonstrating the highestlevel of authenticity.
The speaker that I'm going tohave come speak with me doesn't
even know that he's going tospeak, but we're going to get up
(02:17):
here and we're going to jam andI guarantee you you're going to
be better off for it.
And that's when he called me up, called me up on the stage.
I stood up and I had literallyno idea I was going to be
walking up on the stage.
And I got up there and he saidall right, mike, tell everybody
the background and the backstoryand the recovery, like the
(02:40):
death and the rebirth of MikeKitko.
And I set out in that I thinkwe talked for probably an hour
and a half.
I set out and I talked about thenear suicide, I talked about
being controlled by alcohol.
I talked about the collapsefrom Fortune 500 America.
(03:01):
I talked about the almostcollapse of my marriage, of my
health, of my family, thephysical, mental and emotional
abuse that was inside of myhouse and sometimes the sexual
abuse of my wife.
I talked about all of thefreaking garbage and all of the
(03:21):
shadows garbage and all of theshadows and I just wanted to let
them know who I was, let themsee me.
But there was another aspect ofwhat people got out of that
speaking engagement and whatthey took away.
(03:42):
And after the speakingengagement, there was a line to
speak with me and just aboutevery person in that line said
something along the lines of Ifeel more adequate, I feel more
significant and I feel morevaluable in some way, shape or
form.
(04:02):
They might not use these words,but in some way, shape or form.
They said that they feel morecomplete and more whole because
of my story, because oftentimeswe compare our back office to
other people's front office.
If you look on social media,people people share their wins
(04:24):
easily.
They share all theiraccomplishments.
I closed this deal, I boughtthis business.
Here's my portfolio, here's theamount that I have in my rental
portfolio and I'm worth Xnumber of dollars.
And you see influencers gettingon planes and flying and
(04:47):
sitting on Lambos and you seeall of the highlight reels for
everybody, but very rarely doesanyone share their deepest,
darkest shit, the garbage, theshadows, the pain that they've
been mired in or maybe thatthey've transcended, or maybe
(05:08):
that has them in a strangleholdor a chokehold or a headlock
right there in that moment.
Maybe they're probably notsharing that, but they're
probably having some sense ofstruggle or suffering in that
moment and they're just notletting anyone know.
They're just.
They keep sharing their winsand what that does is, first of
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all, it's inauthentic as fuck,but second of all, it causes
people who are in a state ofstruggle, who are in a state of
pain, who aren't courageousenough to share even their wins
or their challenges.
It's making them feel even morebroken, even more devalued,
(05:51):
even more incomplete, even morejust inadequate.
One of the greatest things thatwe can do is practice radical
transparency, and what I mean bythat is share all of it, share
the good, share the bad, becausewhen we share the good and we
(06:14):
share the bad, everybody can seethat there might be some wins
in our lives, but it's not.
Those wins don't come with anabsence of pain, of some sense
of being bruised and batteredand beaten up a little bit.
Today, on this episode and Ithink this started off
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powerfully, talking about thepower of radical transparency
and radical honesty and sharing,and inside the Inner Wealth
Mastermind, we share our winsand we honesty and sharing.
And inside the InterwealthMastermind, we share our wins
and we share our challenges.
We share all of it so that wecan all understand where we're
winning and where we'rechallenged, so we can pitch in
and we can celebrate the wins,but also so we can bond together
(06:58):
and unify and help peopleovercome those challenges,
because if we don't know about achallenge, then we can't help
people overcome those challenges, because if we don't know about
a challenge, then we can't help.
The reason I'm sharing thistoday and the reason I started
this today is because I want totell you about a personality
quality that I've demonstratedthat has a shadow aspect, and I
(07:20):
want to help you understand whatI'm working through right now.
So maybe by sharing what I'mworking through, maybe it'll
help you feel a little morecomplete, feeling a little more
whole, feeling a little moreadequate and being willing to
share not just your wins withpeople, but also being able to
(07:41):
share something from a state ofvulnerability to help somebody
else feel more valuable, morecomplete, more whole.
You see, I like to say that I'mnot a real people-y person and
I don't love peopling a lot.
Now I do love people.
I do love working with peoplewithin the Interwealth
(08:04):
Mastermind, my inner wealthcommunity, my one-on-one clients
.
I love speaking on a stage.
I love helping people.
I do I legitimately,authentically, absolutely head
over heels, love helping people.
There's a guy that Angie, mywife Angie, and I go when we go
to a certain pub and whenthere's a bartender, and we got
(08:26):
to know this guy and got to hangout with him a little bit.
You know sitting sitting therehaving a pint.
But we got to know this guy andand there's something about him
, he's charismatic and there wasjust he's a, he's younger I was
going to say he's a kid, butcause I'm 52, but he just turned
30.
And there's something really,really cool about this guy and
(08:46):
something like powerful that Ijust wanted to unlock and I
started asking him questionswhen we were at, when we were at
the, at the pub, and he's inthe middle of a career
transition and when I starteddigging into tapping into his
soul a little bit.
I have some assessments that Iuse to help people understand
(09:06):
themselves and their path andkind of what's right for them,
what's correct for them and Ishared this with him and when I
saw the results, this guy wasthis guy's a superstar, he's a
powerhouse.
And I told him this and then Iinvited him over to my house to
talk about the assessment, totalk about his path, and you
know what?
(09:26):
There was nothing in it for me.
I didn't ask anything from thekid.
All I wanted to do was help.
All I wanted to do was leavehim better.
I legitimately love helpingpeople.
I'm a selfless servant and Iloved our session together and I
know he left better than whenhe arrived.
I don't love peopling, but Ilove helping people.
(09:47):
Now, if we ever go, if you evergo to a big event and I'm there
I want you to watch becauseyou're probably going to see me
on the outskirts of the event.
I don't love being in themiddle of the room.
I love being in the front ofthe room, but I don't love being
in the middle of the room.
I would rather be an observeragainst the wall or in front of
the room, commanding the roomand teaching the room, and
(10:10):
there's a certain element of methat would rather be home than
in that room.
I love my alone time.
I love my aloneness.
I love my alone time.
I love my aloneness.
I love my solitude.
It's medicine for me, it's verycalming.
I get to choose my peace, I getto connect with my peace and I
(10:31):
get to honor my peace and itfeels really good to be me when
I'm in a state of solitude.
That wasn't always the case,and if you look at my natal
astrology chart, I have threeplanets in the fourth house and
that's that's the the house of,of peace, of solitude, of home,
of being home.
So, anyway, I do love to bealone and I I feel a lot of
(11:13):
times I feel insecure aroundpeople.
I don't love engaging in smalltalk.
I don't love the get to know youconversation.
I don't love that.
I don't love the getting toknow your favorite sports teams
and I don't enjoy doing life onthe surface.
I love getting really, reallydeep into the mire and into the
(11:37):
muck of pain and suffering andstruggle and all the hidden
places that people like to keeppeople out of.
I love to get into that so thatwe can do something with it, so
that we can make something outof it, so we can heal it, so we
can resolve it.
I love getting into those messyspaces.
But knowing your favorite colorand knowing how many kids you
(12:01):
have and knowing you know ifyou're married, those things
they're not very interesting tome and I find myself, when I'm
out and about, that there's alot of people that engage in
really really shallowconversation.
(12:27):
I get, I'm not entertained, I'mnot amused, I don't enjoy it and
I often find myself verysocially awkward in those
situations.
Now, if we're in a room and Ishake your hand and I say what's
your deepest, darkest pain, andyou start to share, I'm with
you, I'm in the mix.
But man, if somebody like whenI first meet somebody, it's,
it's, it's a struggle for me, Ifeel socially awkward, it causes
(12:48):
me to feel really really offoffset, off balance inside and I
can't describe.
It just gives me these feelingsthat that aren't enjoyable.
It just gives me these feelingsthat aren't enjoyable.
And although I am electric in aroom and I am, my presence is.
(13:15):
It brings peace and it bringspower and it brings purpose to
people's lives.
Those first moments, meetingpeople, it's very, very awkward
and it's just easier to be anintrovert.
Meeting people, it's very, veryawkward and it's just easier to
be an introvert.
Now, in my business, the moreI'm in rooms, the more I'm with
people, the more I interact withpeople, the easier it is for my
business to grow.
People get to know me, they getto trust me, they get to like
me.
(13:36):
They get to see that this toughmarine exterior it's it doesn't
match what's really inside, theooey gooey like helper, servant
person that loves to, loves tohelp people heal and resolve
their shit.
See, the outside of me doesn'tmatch the inside.
(13:59):
The inside's all gooey andmushy.
The outside of me doesn't matchthe inside.
The inside's all gooey andmushy.
The outside, yeah, it lookslike it's tough and it looks
like it's intense and I amintense.
But the outside looks like it'stough and it's rugged, but
inside it doesn't feel that way.
And especially when I'm in aroom and I'm introducing myself
(14:22):
to somebody that I don't know,now when it there's times there
have been times and it'shappening more frequently where
when I'm in a room, people knowwho I am, especially in the St
Louis area, especially in the StLouis area, I go to real estate
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meetups and my wife is knownand my wife has a presence and I
have a presence and I've helpeda lot of companies and I've
helped a lot of people.
And people tend to know me andthey will approach me and it's
obvious that they'reuncomfortable.
But what they don't know is I'mas equally uncomfortable as
they are.
But I wouldn't say.
I had one guy one time say,well, you're famous, and I'm
(15:08):
like I'm not famous.
I'm known.
I'm definitely known,especially in the St Louis area,
but I'm not famous by any means.
And when someone feels uneasyto meet me, I just want them to
know that they're not the onlyuneasy person that's engaged in
(15:29):
that conversation.
Now, there's a couple things Ican do with this.
One is I can keep saying that Iprefer my solitude over being
in a room, which is true, prefermy solitude over being in a
room, which is true.
Or I can start to put myself inthe room and start to show up
and start to find freedom in theinsecurity instead of freedom
(15:52):
from the insecurity, and that'swhere magic lives.
It's when we feel theinsecurity, we feel the
inadequacy, we feel theinsignificance and we continue
to put ourselves into placeswhere that feeling might be
present, but we still do thething anyway.
When we're feeling these things, we've got choices to make.
(16:14):
We can either pretend thatthey're going to go away at some
point, or we can lean forwardin them and bring forth all the
messiness into the world.
The more we share what we'reactually feeling, the more we
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share what's going on in ourbody.
When we share what's going onin our life, not only do we feel
better, we feel more valuable,we feel more seen, but so will
everybody else too.
Guys, I am in August, on August19th.
I am in August, on August 19th.
(17:09):
I've got a new book coming out.
It's called Inner World, outerWorld, and I should receive my
first author copies here in aweek or two.
And the last time I published ahard one publication day, I
woke up in a cold sweat and waslike what the fuck did I do?
Oh, my God, I was scared todeath.
And this one, this one's notquite as scary, but it's it's
also.
There's also some fear in there, there's also some insecurity,
(17:29):
there's also some inadequacy.
And I've distributed my book toall of my, all my students in
the mastermind and in thecommunity and and some, some of
my my closest allies.
I've given it to them and I'mgetting some really really good
feedback from this, unsolicited.
They don't have to give me thisfeedback, I'm not asking them,
(17:50):
but they're giving me backfeedback that's.
That's phenomenal.
And they're giving me backfeedback.
That's phenomenal.
And they're giving me backfeedback that didn't exist for
the first one, for the firstbook, the first hard copy
published book.
But this one I'm starting toget some really good feedback
and you know what?
It's making me even morenervous?
And those nerves are about beingseen.
(18:12):
What I mean by nerves is thosefeelings, but it's about being
seen, it's about being known,it's about people understanding
me at a deeper level.
It's about people seeing thereal messiness and the real
beauty of what's happeninginside of my Kitco, in my mind,
(18:32):
in my body, in the containers ofknowledge and wisdom that I
have in there.
Because when you're seen, andyou're fully seen, then you're
exposed, right.
And when you're exposed, peoplecan use it against you.
Will they use it against me?
No, but we all have thesestories that if I let down my
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guard, then people will takeadvantage of me, and those
stories have started to creep in.
I've been doing spiritual workand healing work for nine years
now.
I started in March, rightaround the end of March, early
April of 2016.
And I've been doing thisspiritual work for nine years
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now and there's always work todo.
Every single successful andwealthy person that I know, they
they call me when, whensomething well, most of the
wealthy and successful peoplethat I know when there's
something that's not right intheir life, when there's
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something that they're facing,when there's an internal threat
that they're feeling, whenthere's this existential crisis,
they call me and we workthrough these things.
See, we're all working throughsomething, every single one of
us.
There's 8.22 billion people onthe face of the planet and every
single person that you see isworking through something has
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something internally that needsto be adjusted.
I call it spiritualchiropractic.
When people call me, we jump ona phone and we start to work
through something.
It's like doing a spiritualadjustment, an energetic
adjustment, and by the end ofthe phone call, the adjustments
made and they're back in action.
They're back in motion untilthey're triggered again and then
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I get another call Untilthere's something else that's
got them in a headlock or gotthem in a chokehold.
But don't confuse the fact thatevery single person you see on
the face of the planet isworking through something.
Don't feel like you're the onlyone that's incomplete or broken
(20:45):
or feels insecure or feelsinadequate, feels insignificant.
I work with some of the mostelite people in the, at least in
the St Louis metropolitan areaand from coast to coast, and
I'll tell you that they're alldealing with something.
They're all dealing inmessiness.
(21:06):
Everybody, every single person.
And the more we share ourmessiness not to get pity and
sympathy, not to be validated,but the more we share our
messiness, the more valuable,real, raw, the more
(21:27):
transformational your life willbecome, because we all, in some
way, shape or form, feelincomplete.
It's a lie, but it's a lie thatwe get to lean into by exposing
it to the world and exposing itto light, because darkness
(21:47):
doesn't doesn't stand a chancewhen it's exposed to light.
And that's what happens when wetell about all of our messiness
and all the shadows and all thethings that you're scared of
sharing with people.
That's what needs to be sharedmost and if you're looking for a
place to do that, lean into me,either me or one of my
(22:10):
containers.
The Interwealth Mastermind, theInterwealth community, my
retreats, my intensives.
I've got a container that canhelp you step into a room with
people doing the exact same work, sharing their shadows, sharing
their messiness, not to getpity and sympathy and all shucks
, but to just feel whole andcomplete in the messiness,
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knowing we're all messy togetherand no one has it all figured
out and there'll always be workto do, and the only time the
work ends is when you take yourlast exhale.
So here's what I'm calling youto task to do.
Number one first and foremost,connect to your completeness and
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connect to your wholeness.
Connect to your perfection, butthat perfection includes
everything imperfect about you,because we're all perfectly
imperfect together.
And if you allow theimperfections to feel perfect,
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if you accept your imperfections, if you embrace your
imperfections, you will find aperfection in who you are.
And that's when you'll realizethe miracle that you are.
And that miracle that you are.
It comes with some messiness andyou'll never rise above all of
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the messiness, but you canbecome a human in the messiness,
with all of us, and I'm callingyou forth into that place from
my messiness.
I'm calling you forth in yourmessiness to come and be messy
together so that we can continueto grow and evolve as spiritual
warriors and keep doing thework and keep growing and keep
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looking deep, deep, deep insideof ourselves for more messiness
that needs to be cleaned up,because the more messiness we
see, the more we can heal, andthe more we heal, the more
valuable, the more powerful, themore purposeful we'll feel.
Don't ignore the messiness anddon't pretend that it's not
(24:21):
there.
Allow it, accept it and embraceit, and that's where your true
power really lives.
Really lives.
If you enjoyed what you heardand you want to learn more, go
to wwwinnerwealthglobalcom formore tools and resources.