November 2, 2023 • 49 mins
Have you ever felt a yearning to stray from the path society has laid out for you? Do you feel a need to redefine your life on your own terms? Our guest today, Trang Nova, knows exactly what that feels like. He bravely ventured off the beaten path, experiencing a quarter-life crisis, leaving his norm, and making the bold decision to start his own business and live life on his terms. Follow us as we unpack his inspiring journey and discover the power of embracing change and growth.
As we traverse the landscape of Trang's life, we uncover how societal norms can box us in, dimming our ability to see the multitude of choices within our reach. Trang's story demonstrates the dissatisfaction that can arise from following these expected paths and the awakening realization that we may not be living our true lives. Tune in as we navigate this complex world of societal expectations and learn how to break free and steer toward the life we truly desire.
Transitioning towards the close of our conversation, we venture into Trang's career switch. We discuss the importance of not letting our past anchor us but using it as a springboard toward our future. He emphasizes that changing course is not a waste of time, but a valuable opportunity to apply past knowledge to new pursuits. The focus shifts to the invaluable power of seeking support during such transitions and the importance of granting ourselves the freedom to take risks and carve our own life paths. Listen in and embolden your journey towards breaking barriers and achieving success.
ABOUT Trang:
Trang Nova is a mentor and speaker for women who are hungry to pivot careers and build their dream business, so they can live out their potential and purpose with freedom and fulfillment.
In her mid-20s, Trang experienced a quarter-life crisis that led her to leave the sports industry so she could help women not just as athletes, but as human beings.
Now, Trang is determined to help others step into their greatest power and thrive in their lives of impact. Ultimately, she believes that when enough individuals are thriving, then humanity will thrive. And when humanity thrives, then the world can thrive for all forms of life and future generations.
FREE GIFT from Trang:
WEEKLY CREATION METHOD 3-step guide to creating mind-blowing weeks of productivity, alignment, and fulfillment! Get it here.
CONNECT with Trang:
Instagram | Facebook | LinkedIn | Website | Podcast
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But before we get into that,let me introduce you to Trang
Nova.
Thanks, trang, for being here.
I really appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Hey, Christina.
Thank you so much for having meon the show.
I am delighted to be here andhaving this conversation that I
think so many more of us need tobe talking about and hearing.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
Yeah, so before we start, just tell us a bit about
who you are and who it is thatyou help.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Yeah, absolutely so.
Hello everyone.
My name is Trang Nova.
It's already introduced, andhow I would describe myself is I
am a mentor and speaker forwomen who are hungry to pivot
and to build their dreambusinesses of impact so that,
ultimately, you can fulfill yourpurpose and potential and
(01:20):
create your dream life offreedom and fulfillment.
And, like there's so manydifferent ways I can talk about
how I've landed here, but for me, I really went on this journey
myself as well, because I hadthe straightforward upbringing
of you've got to work hard,you've got to go to university,
(01:44):
you can have a stable job forlife and then you can enjoy the
reward of a good life.
So then I went to universityand then, after working as a
physiotherapist or physicaltherapist, as it's called over
there for a few years, I wentthrough a quarter life crisis.
I was just 24 years old andthat's when I essentially asked
(02:10):
myself the question is this, itfor the rest of my life?
Like am I like?
Is this all I'm going to do andto contribute to the world and
all I'm going to be for the restof my life?
What do I want to do for therest of my life?
And it's funny, because I'd askmyself that question so many
(02:30):
times, already growing up.
You know when you're growing upand you're constantly asked
what do you want to do when yougrow up?
Right, so I don't alwaysthought about it.
But this time I could thinkabout this and question this
from a different lens andessentially I realized that the
path I was on now was what Ithought I should be doing, based
(02:52):
on what everyone else around mewas suggesting, but it wasn't
what was true to my heart in theway that I wanted to contribute
and in the way that I wanted tolive my life.
So then I went through thatcareer change, I started my
business and since then I canonly hope that my impact has
grown.
But what I can say for sure isI am living my dream life and
(03:16):
I'm more fulfilled than I'veever been before.
So it was a journey, it was afull journey and I describe it
in like two minutes, but it wasquite a few years of ups and
downs and twists and unexpectedturns.
So I want to share that, likeit is possible and, on the other
side of the clouds, it is themost liberating and empowering
(03:40):
existence that we could lead.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Hmm, I love that so much because a similar thing
happened to me, but I wasn'tquite such an early start.
Mine probably happened around35.
And I had checked all the boxesright.
My mother had told me when yougo to college, you'll be happy.
When you graduate, you'll behappy.
When you get that first job,when you have the husband in the
(04:02):
house and the children, you'llbe happy.
And at 35, I had all of thosethings and I don't think I was
more miserable than that time inmy life, because all I kept
thinking was I'm supposed to behappy.
This does not feel happy, right?
And I, similarly to you, like Ithought I was creating my path
(04:24):
on the way to getting thatreally great job.
And basically I was given twooptions doctor or lawyer.
Those are the paths that youshouldn't be on, because you're
smart and so you should just dothe things that are successful.
And although I didn't go to lawschool, I had really thought
about it.
And then I was like, why am Inot happy?
(04:47):
And I realized because I wasliving someone else's life.
I was living this life of whatI should do, not what I actually
wanted to do.
Because, even though they askyou that question what do you
want to be when you grow up?
There seems to be very limitedcorrect answers to that in my
family, like open your ownbusiness.
(05:10):
That was not it, because thatwas unsafe and they were.
You know, my mother is firstimmigrant, first born here from
her family, and so when you haveimmigrants you often have this
you just work for someone elseand you get your paycheck and
you just get really happy thatsomebody has employed you and
(05:33):
that's it Like.
So when I chose to have my ownbusiness, I mean it took my mom
up to eight years to stopsending me one ads because she
was sure that I was messing upmy life.
So that brings us to the one ofthe first permissions I was
(05:55):
thinking about.
When I was thinking about youknow what are the permissions I
had to give myself?
And one was to thinkdifferently than everybody else
and be okay with that, and thatone can be really hard because
it's so ingrained in us that wedon't even notice.
I'm guessing you didn't evennotice that you weren't doing
what you wanted.
(06:15):
You were just kind of on thispath and you're doing the next
right thing.
Is that right?
Speaker 2 (06:20):
Yes, Hold on and you know, I really resonate with
what you're sharing as well, andI'm sure that many of the
listeners do, because, like, wedon't know what we don't know
From the moment that we are bornand as we grow up, we only
absorb what we are told and whatwe observe.
So when we are told that theseare the options, like doctor,
(06:44):
lawyer or failure, then that isall we know, right?
So then we are led into thisfalse sense of freedom that, oh,
we have choice.
We can choose doctor, we canchoose lawyer.
We get to choose.
Like you know, we have thatability to write our story, but
(07:04):
we don't actually see thegreater picture that we're still
choosing options within lines.
There are still these invisiblelines, these invisible
boundaries, you could say thatwe don't recognize and we're
operating within thoseboundaries.
And that's what I recognizedwhen I once I had gone through
(07:29):
this quarter life process and Ilooked at my entire career
pathway.
You know like I thought that Ihad choice and like I could
choose all these differentoptions.
But really there was thisimplicit expectation that these
were the acceptable options andthese were the non acceptable
options.
And it was implicit because notlike my parents ever said, you
(07:52):
can't do this, you can do that.
It was just through passingcomments that might be like oh
yeah, like you know, auntieMaisie, she does this job and
yeah, she, she doesn't reallywork very hard because that job
is easy or whatever it is.
And it's just like passingcomments that then become
ingrained in our paradigm of howwe perceive different career
(08:15):
options.
And I know that we're talkingabout career a lot right now.
But this can be for anything.
This can be for relationships,this can be for just lifestyle,
it can be for any decision thatwe make in our life.
So, yeah, like doctor, lawyer,accountant, like anything in the
health field.
So I chose physiotherapy and Ifelt like that was the best
(08:38):
option based on what theexpectations were.
But in hindsight I look backand I'm like there were so many
other pathways that I firstlydidn't even know existed as an
18 year old.
And even you know, even as wego through our 20s, even as we
go through our 30s, there isstill going to be more that
(09:00):
we're not aware of.
And then, also based on therelative safety of what everyone
else around us is sailing anddoing and what's considered
normal and what's considered,you know, a secure pathway like
we want to blend in.
It's literally a survivalinstinct that we want to blend
(09:20):
in.
We don't want to be completelyoutcasted, so we're going to
choose like what we feel isnormal and within acceptable,
within an acceptable range ofour environment.
So from the moment we are born,we have been absorbing
(09:43):
information from our environment.
Now our parents might say thatthis is acceptable and this
isn't acceptable.
Don't cry like be a good girl,be a strong girl.
You know, auntie Maisie hasthis job.
She doesn't work very hardbecause this job is really easy.
And then we just start tosubconsciously sort information
into categories of what'sacceptable and what isn't.
(10:05):
So we know what we are told byour environment and we may feel
like we have like dominion andchoice, but it's still often
within invisible lines andinvisible boundaries.
Because, yeah, like I canchoose between, I can choose
(10:27):
between lawyer, a canton orsomething in a health field.
That was it for me.
So I'm like cool, I can choose,but really it's still within a
bubble of options Based on theenvironment and what that has.
What that has told me isacceptable.
But what I've realized inhindsight, when I look back, is
(10:53):
I would have loved to been ableto see beyond these invisible
lines.
I know it's challenging because, yeah, we're within those lines
.
So sometimes it's hard to seethat we're even within those
lines in the first place.
But that's why it's so great totake space and to really
question our reality.
(11:14):
You know, like our perceptionis reality in the eye of the
beholder.
So really question ourperception, really question our
reality.
Take it not as fact, not as theonly option, not as a given,
but as one pathway out of many,one pathway out of many.
(11:34):
I look back and I had chosenphysiotherapy because that was
the best option.
I see that there could havebeen so many other pathways I
could have chosen that.
I didn't even consider becauseI just wasn't aware of that,
aware of it at the time.
And I know that we're talkingabout career right now.
But this will go for anydecision that we make in our
(11:57):
life.
This goes for relationships,this goes for lifestyle, this
goes for any paradigm that weperceive is okay.
You know, this is the, this isa given, this is how things are
done, but options beyond what wecurrently feel like there is
within our own.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
I love that so much because I think that that's so
true.
Like every time I do something,I always wonder why do I do it
this way?
Where did that come from?
Or why am I making this choice?
Where did that come from?
And that leads me into like oldbeliefs that we have.
Like, like you said, there'ssome ingrained messages that
we're getting from.
You know, aunt Susie does this,and well, that's not really
(12:42):
acceptable.
You want to go to college soyou can do something better than
that, right, or whatever thetalking in was.
But one of my old beliefs thatheld me back for a really long
time, even after I opened my ownbusiness, was hard work equals
success.
And that did a couple of thingsfor me.
(13:03):
One, I have a hard time havingfun before I do my work right.
Like there's something in methat tells me I have to earn
right, I have to earn it, and ifI'm going to earn it, it has to
be hard.
So, you know, we all start ourbusiness as thinking I'm gonna
work for myself.
(13:24):
That means like I could go fora hike during the day if I
wanted, or I could go shoppingif that's what I wanted, or I
could go to the spa.
You know how many times I'vedone that during like work hours
I mean very few and it's onlybeen in the last couple of years
that I've given myselfpermission to take a break
(13:44):
because I had this really haveto work hard and that equals
success.
And in my brain the way Iinterpreted that was you have to
do all your work first.
It should be really hard workso you feel really good about
accomplishing it.
And I was like I really broughtit down to you I'm only worthy
(14:06):
if I'm working really hard andI'm not gonna be successful if
the work isn't hard.
So even in my own business, Iwould make myself do all the
hard stuff first, not the stuffI really loved and why I was
doing my business in the firstplace, but like all of the
really hard stuff so that Icould feel like I was earning my
worth, because it's a verycultural thing in the United
(14:28):
States that we have to earn oursuccess.
And even though, like, some ofthe things were easy for me,
like the best parts of mybusiness, like coaching and
listening to women and askinggood questions, that's all stuff
that's really easy.
So I would go and make thingshard or find hard things just in
(14:52):
order to earn that.
And I had to start looking atthat and go.
Why am I not allowing myself togo for a hike on a Friday
morning instead of going rightto the computer?
Why am I not?
And that was the belief.
So we have permission to changeour beliefs.
I no longer use that.
Hard work equals success.
It's just what, if it's easy,like I even ask myself the
(15:15):
opposite, which I think is agood way of getting out of that,
what you were saying, like thatrut of just those limited
options within those invisiblelines, like in the path of what
is okay, and what we mean iswhat is okay by other people,
right, like what is okay thatwe've learned that other people
are expecting us to show up in acertain way.
(15:38):
And so there's that permissionof allowing myself to change
beliefs and really question someof those old beliefs, cause, as
we can see, like our youngergenerations my stepdaughter I'm
so proud of her, like she justmanifests jobs, like it's
amazing exactly how she wantsthem I'm like that's not gonna
(15:58):
work out and surely it does, andso they have, like this really
fresh look at the way that we dothings, rather than, like me,
as a Gen X or it's like it wasvery much like this is how you
do it, and once you have yourcollege degree and you get all
these places, you are gonna loveit.
(16:18):
So what is some otherpermissions that you think that
we need to allow ourselves inorder to even consider a career
change?
Cause I know that I have a lotof women who they want to change
careers, but they're in their40s or their 50s and they're
like, is it too late?
I should probably just staywhere I am because it's the path
(16:39):
of least resistance.
Right, it's just to keep movingon the path that I am on, and
what does that mean aboutletting go of all of this
experience and this way thatI've worked up to this?
And so what do we need to giveourselves permission to do in
order to really be open to that?
Speaker 2 (17:03):
The first one that I'd like to share is one that I
really struggled with, andthat's the then we're going to
waste all of the years and thetime and energy that we have put
into creating this success thatwe currently have, or getting
to where we are now.
So we are reluctant to changecourse because of what we have
(17:30):
already put into this particularreality that we're now
experiencing.
And I thought this, you know,for me, even as a 24 year old
right, even as a 24 year old, Ihad that thought oh my God, it's
too late to change.
Now.
This is who I am now, this iswhat I've got a name for.
And, yeah, like I had a name asa physiotherapist, I was
getting called out to do talksand I was at conferences.
(17:53):
Even then, I was alreadythinking that, let alone 10
years later, 20 years later.
But this is what I say to thatnow.
You know, back then I hadaccumulated four years of
university plus four years ofwork under my belt, so it was
eight years in total, and at thestart I was like that's a waste
(18:14):
.
You know, I don't want to wasteeight years of my life, but
here's the thing what is more ofa waste Eight years of the past
that is now already done andtotally doesn't exist anymore,
or the next 30, 40, 50 years ofyour life.
(18:35):
What's more of a waste?
Wasting the eight years thathave already gone, or the next
few decades of your life thatare very real and is yet to come
and like?
When I saw it like that, Irealized that what counts is
what is yet to come.
(18:56):
No, that is the only thing thatwe really have in the present
moment and what we are yet to beable to create for ourselves.
So that is what we really wantto be putting out energy and our
focus towards Not the past, butwhat is yet to come, because
that is what we're going to beexperiencing for the rest of our
(19:18):
life, like we're going to bewaking up and that is the life
we're going to be living.
So I'd much rather changecourse now, take the time to
build up that business, pivotcareers into my dream pathway,
serving my mission, living mybest life, and I don't mind how
(19:39):
long it takes, because that timeis going to pass anyway.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Yeah, I love this for so many reasons.
Because one, we were saying howthis applies like regular life.
Well, I get midlife women who,if it's not their career, it
might also be like well, myhusband and I have had this
really miserable relationshipfor 20 years and but you know,
we've been married and I don'twanna just chip in like and I'm
(20:07):
not saying that once we getupset, we should like be like,
oh, we're just gonna get adivorce.
That's not what I'm saying.
But do you wanna spend another20 years being miserable?
Like, is that better thanactually shifting?
And sometimes it's just thatfear within us, of course, of
shifting that thing.
But what I also love aboutcareers or even relationships is
(20:30):
it wasn't for nothing.
Right Like you, being a physiowasn't for nothing.
There was.
You went to college which gaveyou skills beyond physio.
Right Like you learned how toaccomplish tasks on time and
deadlines and you know likebuild recall, like yeah, it's
all of that stuff.
So, no matter what skills, likewhat we're moving into in the
(20:52):
future, we're not starting fromzero because we have all of this
experience.
Maybe some of the morepractical parts of it doesn't
seem like it fits, but I was inthe corporate world before and
marketing well, marketing skillshelped me.
Now, right, learning how toreach out to people and get
(21:12):
guests for events that stillhelps me now.
So I don't think I think thatwe have to remember that we're
not starting from zero.
We're starting with a differentset of experience is all it is
just to reassure you.
So, and what I heard waspermission to toss it if it's
not working, like yeah,permission just to let it go
(21:36):
right, and whatever that role is.
I remember we had a doctor onthe summit and she came from an
immigrant family as well, and soshe worked so hard to become a
doctor first person in yourfamily to go to college, to go
get her doctorate, and when shecame home and was telling them
like, oh well, I just I don'twanna be a doctor anymore, like
(21:58):
there was a lot of resistance.
Let's say to that.
But I think what we need to letgo of here is like this
external validation that onceand I love that you called it a
quarter life crisis, becausemidlife crisis is the thing that
so many if you look up, midlifecrisis is like the first word
after it and I like to see it asa midlife calling or a quarter
(22:21):
life calling.
Because there's like somethingwithin us that's saying please
listen to me, this isn't right,something's not right here, and
so giving ourselves permissionto listen to that tiny voice
inside of us that's like hey,hey, yeah.
I might be right.
Maybe not everybody else isright, but I know what's going
(22:41):
on for us.
If that makes sense for you,yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
Yeah, absolutely Like permission to let go, because
life is not linear.
There doesn't have to be aparticular sequence of how we go
through life and the milestonesthat we hit.
In fact, I see it as why notlive multiple lifetimes in one
(23:08):
life?
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Why do?
Speaker 2 (23:09):
we have to just have one tap on of who we are and
this is how we do things andthat is our entire life.
Why not live a chapter of ourlife, so a decade of our life,
where we are in one career, weare in maybe one relationship
that served us at the time?
We were happy at the time, wegot to experience all of the
(23:32):
things at the time and thenmaybe for the next decade of our
life, we get to experience acompletely different chapter,
completely different lifetime,and that's.
I went through this morerecently.
So I've spoken about my quarterlife crisis, but I have been
speaking openly about how thisyear I actually did separate
from a decade long relationshipand it was scary.
(23:56):
You know, that was tough.
It's been one of the mostchallenging years of my life.
But there's a beautiful quote, Ibelieve, by Seneca.
That is we often suffer more inour imagination than in reality
.
We often suffer more in ourimagination than in reality,
meaning the way that we build upthe image of how our life will
(24:21):
look when we let go and when wechange, like how scary it will
be, what other people wouldthink about and how hard are we
gonna have to work because, like, our mind tells us that we're
starting from grand up, eventhough we are not as we just
spoke about before.
It makes it seem so scary, sounrealistic, but what I've
(24:43):
learned through the multiplemajor life changes that I've
gone through we will always beokay, we will make it work,
because it's just one day at atime and if we were okay before,
we will be okay again.
And I think that has reallyhelped me because, yeah, like
(25:08):
when we're standing at thebottom of Mount Everest and
we're looking at the summit andthat's where we wanna go, it
just seems so far away, it seemsso intimidating.
But every journey of a thousandmiles starts with just the
first step and when we do takethat first step, we're like,
okay, cool, this is actuallydoable, I am doing okay.
(25:29):
So taking that step, one at atime, means that we will make it
.
We are ready and we will makeit Because I also do believe
that we won't.
It's any challenges in life.
We are ready for it and likethat sounds a little bit woo-woo
, but in terms of examples,think about a three-year-old
(25:53):
toddler.
Think about a three-year-old.
What are their biggestchallenges they're gonna face?
They're gonna face challengesof, like how to kick a ball, how
to run making friends atkindergarten, like that's going
to be their biggest challenges.
Right, they're not gonna havechallenges related to finances,
they're not gonna havechallenges related to mortgage,
because they are literally notat that stage of their life
(26:14):
where they are ready and capableto navigate that challenge.
But if we are a woman, apowerful, intelligent woman in
our 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, and weare dealing with this new,
looming decision to changecareers, to change relationships
, to start a new life in a newcountry even right, like I lived
(26:37):
abroad this year for the firsttime in my life and that means
we are ready for that challengewe are mentally, emotionally,
physically, ready to navigateand rise up through this
challenge.
So, like, have that faith inourselves because we can do it,
(26:58):
we'll be okay.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Like a permission to believe in ourselves, right, a
permission to believe that ifthere is a voice calling, if we
do have this midlife calling orwhatever is happening, that it's
valid, that we can actuallylisten to it.
And I also heard thispermission to almost, like, feel
the fear and do it anyway.
Understand that, yeah, this isscary, I might fail, might have
(27:23):
to pick myself back up and tryagain.
I might, you know, learn somelessons.
I'm not really keen on learning, but this permission just to
allow ourselves to fail, allowourselves to have the fear and I
love the way that you explainthat.
Yeah, because if we're imaginingit, there is part of our brain
(27:45):
that is like dreaming of it,even if it feels scary, like for
you and your relationship, likeit had to feel scary to be.
Like am I tossing 10 years outthe door or is this, you know?
But what would be better if infive or 10 years, that I had the
exact right relationship?
That was better for me, ratherthan just staying because I'm
(28:10):
supposed to or I've put in thetime or whatever.
And I also loved how you saidabout living different,
different lifetimes in onelifetime.
Like permission to change ourroles right, permission to
change our own identity overlike you know, am I a corporate
(28:32):
marketing person?
or what if I could think of morethan that and really permission
to dream?
Because I think sometimes Italk about this in one of my
courses.
I think sometimes we just dreamto the shoreline, like you said
, like here's the path that waslaid out, and we wanna dream in
a way where, like, let me justget rid of the problems, but
(28:54):
then we just get to wanna thrive.
We have to have this permissionto dream bigger, to allow
ourselves to dream bigger, tojust imagine what else could be
out there, rather than just like, oh well, here's the
professions that were presentedto me as okay, but you know,
there's a million professions.
(29:15):
Not only that.
Every day it seems like withtechnology and the way that the
world changes, there's newprofessions starting every day.
There was no such thing as aninfluencer 20 or 30 years ago.
Like, that's a new thing, thatgot so like I couldn't have
grown up and been like, oh, I'mgonna be an influencer when I
grow up still not my goal, butjust the idea of like.
(29:39):
Of course there's so many pathsthat we don't know.
There's paths that haven't evenbeen invented yet, that maybe
is waiting for you to be the onethat invents it, yeah yes, I'm
adding on to that, christina.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
The US Department of Labor actually estimates that
the average person will have 14jobs by the time they are 38
years old, like that is thereality of this fast paced world
that we live in now.
As you say, the best job todaymay not even exist in five years
time, and jobs that don't existtoday could be the next best
(30:17):
opportunity in five years time.
We don't know that.
That is the reality of ourworld.
Yet there is that implicitnarrative that we are going to
be married to one profession andone identity for our life.
So this is where we've gottagive ourselves that permission
to not just operate within thelines but to abolish the lines
(30:40):
completely.
Let's change the paradigm ofwhat we can and can't do and do
whatever we wanna do.
Like we have the pen to our ownbook, we get to write whatever
book we wanna write, how manyother chapters we wanna write,
how adventurous and contrastingeach chapter gets to be.
(31:01):
And it makes it fun, you know,like it makes life fun when we
kind of let go of the rigidgrasp that we have on what we
have to be and where our pathneeds to go.
It really gives us that sense ofinner peace and I know it's
(31:23):
easier said than done, but itall starts with listening to
this conversation and startingto question ourselves what do we
really want?
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Like when was the?
Speaker 2 (31:34):
last time we got to ask ourselves that question
right Like what do we actuallyreally?
Speaker 1 (31:38):
want, right, and it's like I always hear, like, well,
which path do I take?
Well, sometimes we got tobulldoze a new one, right, I
mean?
And so it's not just permissionto take a path, but it's also
permission to create one if theone that you want isn't there,
and that's completely viable.
(31:59):
And I think, with what you saidabout having 14 jobs or
whatever, before we're 38, thatis actually to me seems really
beautiful, because now you havethese 14 slightly different
skillsets, probably, and thatmakes you unique, right?
It makes each of us unique.
The different combination ofskills that we have and desires
(32:23):
that we have and ways that wewant to be able to use those
skills.
It all makes us unique to havethat different combination.
And so I think that, like I said, the permission is sometimes we
just need to create a new pathand that's okay.
(32:43):
But in order to do that, what Ihad to do was let go I had to
give myself permission to let goof external validation, of
people pleasing, because, let metell you, when you decide to do
something against what otherpeople are doing, not only will
they fear for you, but there'salso sometimes people who are
(33:05):
like jealous that you giveyourself permission to really
explore rather than just conform, cause that's really, I believe
, like what Gen X was kind oftaught was just like here,
you're gonna conform, you'regonna go to college, you're
gonna get a job, you're gonna goto college, you're gonna get a
job.
And I'm not saying that collegeis bad, I'm just saying that we
(33:30):
didn't really get a chance tocreate our own path, as you said
.
We really, somehow the messagesthat we got was like okay,
maybe there's four paths or eventen paths, but which path do I
choose?
Rather than like, well, what isit that I actually want, and
how we can listen to that innervoice that's really asking us to
(33:53):
do something different.
I mean, I think that that isreally our connection to spirit,
or connection, and not with itWithout going to woo-woo, but
like a connection to our ownsoul path, I guess.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Yeah, yeah, and here's one as well that I really
think needs a mentionpermission to make a lot of
money.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
Ooh, ooh, I got chills yeah.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Honorable, honorable mention because how many of us
are told that.
You know, money is the root ofall evil.
All rich people are jerks.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
They're all selfish and manipulative.
Speaker 2 (34:35):
That's why they are rich Money doesn't grow on trees
.
Make sure you save money and youdon't spend and enjoy the money
that you make, and especiallyas women right.
Times are changing, so we livein this beautiful, opportunistic
and abundant world for womentoday, but generationally the
(34:57):
narrative that women aren't theones that are in power or in
ownership of the money as well.
But, like I said, in today'sworld women have more
opportunities, more power, morefreedom, more voice than ever
before.
So giving ourselves permissionto hold a lot of money, because
(35:20):
if we're not holding that money,then someone else is.
And if someone else is holdingthat money, they might just be
spending it on private jets oryachts or drugs or something,
but if we hold that money, thenwe get to distribute that money
in a way that is meaningful tous.
So, maybe we get to live ourbest life and enjoy the luxuries
(35:42):
that we want to enjoy, but wethen also get to distribute that
money towards causes, towardsprogress, towards changing this
world that we believe isrighteous or is true to our
values, and that's how.
I've had to switch my mindsetaround because for a long time
in my business, at the start, Iwas literally repelling money.
(36:04):
I didn't want too much money.
I feel guilty, oh my gosh.
I don't want to take too muchmoney.
I don't want to charge too much.
I'm not good with money, so I'mnot going to have a lot of it,
because then I'll just squanderit.
But then I've had to change itaround that it's actually
aligned to my purpose and to myvalues, to direct money in my
way so that it can be utilizedfor positive change, for
(36:29):
positive impacts in this world.
Speaker 1 (36:32):
I completely forgot about that one that definitely
needs to mention, because I alsohave been like well, what's the
minimal that I need to charge?
Because I want to be able tohelp more people, and I had a
coach once that was like won'tyou be able to help more people
if you actually charge more?
Because you'd have moreresource to be able to go out
(36:54):
there and help people?
You could, like you said, giveto the causes that are important
to you.
If you say that these causesare important, don't you want to
raise money for them?
Don't you want to be able togive back and make sure that
these things survive?
And isn't that also part ofyour mission?
So I'm really understandingthat.
(37:17):
It's not about the greedy green.
It's about us resourcingourselves, and that is like
money is a resource, but it's nodifferent than energy or time
in that it's just one more waythat we use that resource and we
say, yes, actually make me moremoney so that I can really
(37:41):
carry out my mission, whateverthat is, whether that's helping
women or saving animals orsaving the earth in ways to
preserve yeah, yeah, there's somany and that would create the
shift to a more feminine way oflooking at resource right,
(38:01):
instead of men just raising itor people who just raise it and
just blow it all just to have agood time, which, if that's, you
do it, but for me what wouldmean more would be able to
really impact the mission that Ihave of supporting women and
(38:21):
loving them and getting them toempower themselves, and money is
just one more way that they canresource themselves, so lovely.
Is there one more mission thatyou want to talk about before we
go.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
The last one, I think I'm sure you have a full list
of things.
Speaker 1 (38:42):
Yeah, pick one so many, so many.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
I think that the last one is permission to be and
this is related to the moneyconversation the permission to
be super successful and worldclass in what we do.
And the reason why I want tofinish up with this is because
many of us desire that or maybenot all of us, but we may want
(39:07):
to be world class, we may wantto be extremely successful in
what it is that we do, but dueto our own sense of self and our
identity that we currently hold, we don't see ourselves as
being worthy of that or beingcapable of that.
So, you know, 80 up to 80% ofpeople experience imposter
(39:29):
syndrome.
8 out of 10 people experienceimposter syndrome, thinking that
we're not good enough, we arefraud, our current success is a
fluke.
But the thing is we are alwayscapable of more, because if we
see our potential as where it isright now, then we'll be a 20
(39:53):
year old for the rest of ourlife.
We'll never be learning moreskills, more experiences,
gaining more knowledge.
We'll just be like a 20 yearold in a 50 year old's body.
But that's not true.
We are constantly growing andevolving.
So remembering that, not justin hindsight, but like going
forward as well that justbecause where we are now with
(40:14):
our certain experiences, maybewith some setbacks up to date,
maybe some failures up to date,maybe some evidence up to date,
maybe there's been certainfeedback that clients or
colleagues or previous bosseshave told us that was not stuff
by last.
It does not define who we canyet to be, so giving us, giving
(40:40):
us those permission to be supersuccessful and that we are
worthy of that.
Because I'm a dream, right,right, and that's why, actually,
I ran a retreat over theweekends, and one of the
exercises that is often quotedas the best exercise at the
(41:01):
retreat is getting the women towrite down a list of all the
things that they are most proudof themselves.
Speaker 1 (41:09):
And it doesn't end there.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
They then stand in front of the group and share
that list, owning themselves andowning their space.
And it's so scary becauseeveryone at the site is like, oh
my God, are we really going todo this?
And then by the end you knowthey're just like, yeah, and I
did this and I did that, and I'mso proud of myself and
everyone's like, yeah, you go,girl, like you do that and like
(41:33):
being able to own it, that weare so capable and simply the
fact that we are here, seeing it, dreaming it, wanting it, we
are ready and worthy to achievethat.
So giving us a solution toevolve beyond what we can
(41:53):
currently see.
Speaker 1 (41:55):
And really owning it.
And I love that because therewas a study done on men and
women.
When they go to interview andlike it's like some astronomical
number, like 70 to 80% of menwill over talk their
accomplishments, making themseem bigger than they really are
.
And women do the exact opposite.
(42:18):
They tend to play down theiraccomplishments, say, well, it
was part of the team, the teamhelped me, or yeah, you know, I
just did that like it'snonchalantly right.
They don't really claim as muchof their significance or
magnificence since then that mendo.
And it's just kind of grown inthere.
(42:41):
And I mean, I think back to mychildhood, especially in my age
generation, and it was alwayslike don't show off, don't boast
, don't you know, look like thecenter of attention and now I'm
like constantly asking myclients what are you celebrating
?
And they'll go well.
I'm grateful that I'm like no,what are you celebrating about
(43:03):
yourself?
Not what are you grateful forin your life?
That's great.
I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but it's more about it's so
much harder for us to go.
I made this choice and I'mreally proud of myself.
I move forward on this and I'mreally proud of myself for doing
that.
Pride seems to be something thatwe have to give ourselves
(43:25):
permission, you know, to beprideful, really celebrate
ourselves, but when we do that,we're also giving permission to
other women to celebratethemselves and celebrate each
other, rather than like gettingin this natural competition that
we can tend to get into.
Really, oh, beautiful, what abeautiful conversation today.
(43:45):
Hopefully it's been helpingsome of our audience really open
up to the idea that there'smany ways of thinking about
something and if you needpermission, you know reach out
to me or Trang, and we would behappy to pretend to give you
permission, because we can'tpossibly do that.
You have to give it to you.
But if you need a littleencouragement, we would be happy
(44:07):
to offer some of that.
I know that you have a freegift for us.
You want to share that with us?
Speaker 2 (44:14):
Yeah, absolutely.
So I am so big on us reallystepping into our highest power
and fulfilling our purpose andpotential.
So that can be through givingourselves permission, that can
be through like giving andbuilding our dream business.
And then part of that as wellis making sure that we you know
(44:38):
our fullest life.
So something that I like toshare is the weekly creation
method guide.
It's a three step process foryou to be as productive as
possible in your weeks, so thatyou have the first ability to
achieve all the things that youwant.
And then also, number two issee yourself in a different
(45:01):
light, because when we finishour weeks on a high, having done
all the things that we want todo, we have followed through
with our own commitment andpromises.
Then we now value ourselvesmore.
We actually, I believe, respectourselves more.
So it's all part of the biggerpicture, but I have a weekly
(45:21):
reflection and creation processCreation.
So we're not just managing ourweeks as they come up, but we
are creating our weeks andtherefore our life.
I have a process that hasworked so well for me over the
years.
It's worked really well for myclients and I have it for free,
so I'll give that link to you,christina.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
And then, yeah, anyone is going to utilize it.
Click on it, it's there.
Yeah, it'll be below, and allof Trang's contact information
will also be there.
So if she said something thatmade you think and you have a
question or you want to reachout for that support in you know
, allowing yourself permissionto change what you're thinking
(46:02):
and change the way that you'rethinking, or change your career,
trang is the person for you.
Thank you so much for beinghere today.
I really appreciate you.
This has been a lovelyconversation, thank you,
christina.
Speaker 2 (46:16):
Once again, it is such an honor to be on the show,
to share this conversation withyou and hopefully touch on the
lives of the women out there.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Yeah, and thank you shifters for tuning in.
I hope that you go out and findnew ways to give yourself
permission to really engage inyour life and to really expand
and explore.
Have a good week.
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