January 14, 2024 • 20 mins
In this episode we dissect the radical concept that our life's journey is, in fact, our greatest ally—even when shrouded in adversity. Life's meandering roads are purposefully steering us towards growth, offering repeated chances to make choices for our greater good.
More info: https://www.thejourneyblueprint.com/
Contact: Julie@thejourneyblueprint.com
Read the book: https://www.amazon.com/Journey-Blueprint-Following-Heros-Control/dp/0692132562/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Julie (00:08):
Hello everyone and welcome back.
I'm so glad you're here.
I want to tell you about aconversation I had recently with
the writing group and before Iget too far into it, I can
already tell I feel reallystrongly about the topic that
came up through thisconversation and sometimes, as I
talk about things that I feelpretty strongly about, it comes
out in my voice.
(00:28):
I can tell that I speak alittle differently when I talk
about it, but it's important andit's going to touch on some
pretty tender things for somepeople.
I think it does for me anyway,as I talk about this.
So I just want to mention thatbefore we get started.
This conversation was with awriting group.
It was a group of authors and Iwas talking to them about ways
(00:50):
that they can use the journeymodel as a way to bring
authenticity into their writing.
It was a lovely discussion andthere were a lot of fun
connections that could be made,as I invited these authors to
use their own experiences of thedifferent steps in the journey,
especially their emotionalexperiences, to create
characters that are believable,that resonate with the reader,
and during the presentation Imentioned in almost an offhand
(01:13):
and a comment that the journeyhas our backs.
And when I said that, and thenlater in the discussion that we
had at the end, there was oneauthor in particular that caught
hold of that statement, and Icould tell that he was actually
struggling with it, and the morethat he shared with the group,
the more it became clear that hejust couldn't believe it.
For him, if the journey had hisback, then he would have had
(01:36):
the success that he had beenlooking for.
The people who could launch hiscareer would have shown up if
the journey had his back.
If the journey had his back,things would be working the way
he wanted, and they weren't.
Therefore, the journey couldn'thave his back because things
were different than the way hewanted them to be, and it was
really difficult for him toaccept this idea that the
(01:57):
journey is looking out for us,and I think, especially if we're
experiencing a lot of reallyhard things, it can feel very
much like the journey doesn'thave our backs, that the
opposite is actually true.
However, I feel very stronglythat not only does the journey
have our back, but it actuallyhas our backs better than we do,
(02:19):
and I'll explain what I mean bythat, but that's what we're
going to talk about today, andagain I'm going to talk about
the journey as though it hasintelligence, because I believe
it does, and I think giving thejourney the qualities of an
intelligent entity can give usthe ability to relate to it in a
way that allows us to have arelationship or insight with it.
(02:41):
And that may not work foreveryone, and I totally
understand that, but it might bean interesting thought
experiment if you're willing tocome with me for the next few
minutes.
So when I say that the journeyhas our backs, what exactly does
that mean?
Well, practically speaking, oneway that it shows up is by
(03:01):
guaranteeing that we have to goall the way through the journey.
It in fact, in some ways leavesus no other choice.
Each of the steps in thejourney process is deliberate
and it's necessary it's includedto ensure that we actually
change and become better Now ashuman beings and so much of this
(03:22):
is human behavior and humanthought processes versus the
journey.
But as humans, we actuallyoften want to skip steps.
We want to jump over the hardparts and given our opportunity,
we probably would.
But the journey knows that ifwe skip steps, it would deprive
(03:43):
us of the experiences that weneed.
But the journey knows thatdoing so would deprive us of the
experiences that we actuallyneed.
It knows that this is the way,and that's not the only way.
Another way that the journeyhas our back is that in our fear
(04:03):
and our weakness and ourfrustration.
If we choose to continue down apath that is not for our
greater good, by refusing thechange in the abyss, or refusing
to learn during the trials andtemptations, the journey will
continue to bring theopportunity to us to choose
differently, over and over andover, even, and maybe especially
(04:28):
, when we don't want it to.
Another way that it shows upfor us is that it appears to
know the end from the beginning.
It knows the bigger picture ofthe best version of ourselves,
and that's a vision that wedon't have.
And I want to dig in just alittle bit deeper into what
having our backs can look likewith that lens, because, when it
(04:48):
comes to journeys, we have toremember that the journey exists
as a mechanism for becoming thebest possible version of
ourselves, and the ebb and theflow of building up and breaking
down the pathway to being ourgenuine selves comes through
these experiences, theseexperiences that change us
(05:10):
permanently.
And with that understanding, wealso have to remember that at
the beginning of the journey wehave our limited, lacking
understanding.
As the call comes to us, we seein front of us possibilities
based on what we can currentlysee.
So let me give you an exampleto see if I can demonstrate this
(05:30):
.
We'll take Harry Potter when hiscall comes at the beginning of
his journey.
We're talking about the verybeginning of the first book.
All Harry knows is that he isbeing invited to come to a
wizarding school.
That's what the invitation says.
He doesn't really know whatthat means.
(05:51):
All he knows is that it will beaway from the miserable home
life he's used to.
He knows nothing about magic.
He knows nothing about wizards.
He didn't know there was aschool.
He just knows it will be awayfrom where he is and where he
has been unhappy.
The path that he can see aheadof him is to go to a school and
(06:14):
supposedly become a wizard Again, not that he even knows what
that means, but that's what'sgiven to him.
That's what he can see Now, atthis point.
If someone had told Harry thathis journey would be to defeat
Lord Voldemort and the DeathEaters through destroying
Horcruxes and castingExpelliarmus, ejecting the wand
(06:35):
from Voldemort's hand into hisown as the killing curse
rebounded off his body.
He would have no clue what theywere talking about None.
The actual end of his journeywas literally incomprehensible
for him.
He didn't have the ability tounderstand what was coming, what
(06:57):
lay ahead of him.
He knew nothing of magic, hedidn't know specific spells, he
had no idea who Voldemort was.
The knowledge and theexperience that he was going to
need were going to come throughthe journey, and he had no way
of knowing that.
And this happens to us so often.
(07:17):
There's an opportunity thatcomes up and we see a potential
outcome that we think is notonly the most likely but also
the best possible outcome, andwe embark on the journey
believing that we can see theend from the beginning.
This could be in applying for ajob, it could be in starting a
relationship, it could be inhaving children, it could be
(07:37):
going to school.
There's all sorts of ways thatwe think this journey should end
.
The problem is we can't see theend from the beginning.
We have no clue what ourjourney holds for us Because,
just like Harry, we don't haveany way to comprehend that which
(08:01):
we have no experience with,that which we've never
encountered, that which we canonly understand after the
journey is over, andunfortunately, we tend to anchor
ourselves on the way that weperceive at the beginning that
the journey should play out,before we know any of the things
that we're going to need toknow.
But I want to talk aboutanchoring for just a second.
(08:23):
If you've never heard ofanchoring before, it's really
worth taking a moment to talkabout what it means, because it
actually affects us a lot in ourday-to-day living.
Anchoring in terms of acognitive bias because that's
what it is describes people'stendency to rely too heavily on
the first piece of informationthat they receive on a topic.
(08:44):
So, whether or not thatinformation is accurate, people
use it as a reference point oranchor that's why it's called
anchoring to make subsequentjudgments about that situation.
So let's say, for example, thatyou are wanting to buy a
certain car and let's say thatthe first price that you hear
for that car is $10,000.
This number let's just say itcame from a friend that was
(09:07):
guessing how much the car mightbe worth.
Now you have no idea if thisnumber is realistic at all, but
each time you hear a subsequentnumber about how much that car
would cost, the tendency will beto compare it to $10,000.
Anything under $10,000 willseem like a deal.
Anything over $10,000 will seemtoo expensive.
(09:29):
Now, this is true even if theactual value of the car is,
let's say, $15,000, where$12,000 compared to $15,000
seems like a deal.
If you are anchored at $10,000,it will be hard to feel like
$12,000 is a deal.
Hopefully that makes sense.
(09:50):
Wherever we anchor ourselves, wewill compare that at any given
moment to new information thatcomes in.
That becomes the baseline thatwe compare things to.
So when we stand at thebeginning of our journeys, we
anchor ourselves in whatever wethink the outcome should be.
At that moment it becomes ourgauge for success.
(10:12):
But what we were thinking thejourney should be is totally
different than what it'sactually about.
Anything else might actuallyseem disappointing because of
where we're anchored.
If we don't get that job, if wedon't write a bestseller, if we
don't get the investment money,whatever it is, we feel like
(10:35):
we've somehow been let down.
And the solution here isactually to recognize our
anchors, to look at where we'refeeling disappointed or like
we're not getting the best dealand see if we can tell where
those anchors are and, ifpossible, re-anchor to more
realistic, more reliable or morecorrect information.
(10:59):
So back to the journey here.
One of the reasons people thinkthat the journey doesn't have
their back is because of thatinitial anchor.
They think they know what thejourney is supposed to be about
and, honestly, chances are verygood that they don't.
They don't have any idea whatthe journey is about Because
(11:20):
they can't, not until thejourney's over.
And yet they judge the journeyagainst this anchor and they
feel like they've been let downor, even worse, that the journey
itself has abandoned them.
What we're really saying inthose moments is that if the
journey doesn't turn out the waywe think it should, that means
that the journey doesn't haveour back, and that's where I
(11:42):
want us to be careful Again.
I understand when it's hard.
It can be very difficult to seethis, but we put such rigid
boundaries around what we see asa singular, acceptable outcome
that we see everything else asfailure and can feel abandoned.
If the journey really caredabout me, it would make sure I
(12:04):
get what I want, and I am not inany way chastising or judging
these thoughts.
They are totally normal andthey follow absolutely the way
our brains work.
But hopefully you can see howthese thoughts can be very
limiting and they cansignificantly alter our
(12:26):
willingness to partner with thejourney.
Because, you see, the journeywants the best for us, the
actual best, the real best, thebest that will take us closer to
the person we're capable ofbecoming.
It's a kind of love that runsvery deep and with it the
(12:47):
understanding that sometimeswhat we want will keep us stuck,
stuck in our patterns, stuck inour habits, stuck in our fears.
The journey wants so much morefor us.
And to bring in a little from myyoga studies, there is a Hindu
god named Kali that demonstratesthis kind of love.
(13:10):
One of my teachers, as Istudied to become a yoga
therapist, spoke of Kali in thisway and it really resonated
with me.
So, with all respect toward thetraditions and lore of Kali,
this version is the one that I'mgoing to be using today, the
one that this teacher taught me.
In this interpretation of thisgoddess, we look at her as an
archetype, a core myth thatrepresents some deep and
(13:33):
universal truths.
In this case, kali is fierce.
Her visage is frightening.
She has 10 arms that she usesto kill and to destroy.
Her eyes are red like fire.
Her tongue is extended,although she's exuding a breath
of fire and to look at her canbe frightening.
(13:54):
In fact she is never notfrightening, and that fear only
debins when you come tounderstand the destruction that
she's capable of.
But Kali's archetype is not justdestruction.
It's also transformation andtranscendence.
She is the goddess of love andprotection.
(14:15):
You see, she loves us sofiercely and so deeply that she
is unwilling to allow us to stayin our self-deceptions, in our
limiting beliefs.
It's with her 10 arms that shecomes to slay our demons, and
she does not pull her punches Tobring to light.
(14:39):
That which holds us down whenshe would have us rise is
exactly where she lives.
She fearlessly takes what weare afraid to let go of,
destroying our old selfviolently if that's what it must
be so that the new self can beborn, and I love this idea.
(15:00):
It's so much like the journeythat I've come to know.
The journey knows and sees thebest of us.
It is committed to seeing thatbest come to its realization,
even if it means that we must gothrough a difficult, painful,
transformative process to getthere.
The journey will ask of usthose things that we hold most
(15:26):
tightly, especially if thosethings are holding us back.
It will provide the samelessons over and over and over
again.
As long as we refuse to learnthem, the journey will continue
to bring them back.
In fact, pema Children talksabout this in such a beautiful
way In her book when Things FallApart.
She said nothing ever goes awayuntil it has taught us what we
(15:47):
need to know.
If we run 100 miles an hour tothe other end of the continent
in order to get away from theobstacle, we find the very same
problem waiting for us when wearrive.
It just keeps returning withnew names, forms, manifestations
, until we learn whatever it hasto teach us about where we are
(16:10):
separating ourselves fromreality, how we are pulling back
instead of opening up, closingdown instead of allowing
ourselves to experience fullywhatever we encounter, without
hesitating or retreating intoourselves.
I was so struck when I firstread that nothing ever goes away
until it's taught us what weneed to know, that we do have
(16:35):
multiple opportunities to learnthe lessons that the journey has
for us.
This is, I think, one of thedifficult truths of journeys.
There's more than one, but thisis most certainly one of them.
The journey is not content toleave us in our weaknesses, in
(16:55):
our deceptions in our fears.
It cares about us too much forthat to happen.
It will hold these lessons forus, painfully and brutally, if
that's what it takes in orderfor us to finally be free of
what's holding us back, nomatter how blind we are, how
(17:15):
desperately we hold onto thatwhich harms us, the journey does
not give up on us.
It will bring us these lessonsover and over and over and over,
giving us chance after chanceafter chance after chance to be
truly and finally free ofeverything that is not us.
(17:41):
So when I say that the journeyhas our back, I say it with a
reverence for all the thingsthat our limited perspective
prevents us from seeing.
I know that, left to my own, Iwould, because of my human
nature, choose to stay in mycomfort zone.
I would choose to take the easyroute that doesn't require
(18:02):
change.
But if that happens, I reallynever have a chance to become
the best version of myself,because it isn't in my nature
for most of us as well to do iton my own.
There's so much I would miss,so much I wouldn't be able to
(18:23):
experience, so much that couldhave changed me, freed me, if
only I had been able to let it.
And with that same reverence, Iacknowledge how hard this is.
It's easy for me to say thisfrom this point in my life where
I'm able to see certain thingsrelatively clearly.
(18:44):
But I know it's hard.
I know how deeply and painfullyand terribly hard that these
journeys can be.
And the fact that the journeyhas our back is little comfort.
When we grieve, when weexperience loss, when our very
identity is shattered into amillion pieces, I know, I
(19:08):
promise I know, and in no waywould I want to try to dismiss
any of those things, becauseit's often in those tender,
vulnerable, soul-searing momentsthat we're able to see the
world and ourselves as we trulyare.
But maybe, just maybe, havingthat knowing somewhere in the
(19:30):
back of our minds as we suffercan give us the strength to hold
on just a little longer, tobreathe once more, and then once
more, and then once more.
Journeys are not for the fate ofheart, my friends.
They will require everything ofus.
But knowing that this is thesacrifice for becoming our true,
(19:53):
amazing, wonderful,world-changing selves, at some
point we'll be able to look backand see the divine hand of the
journey picking us up, carryingus, comforting us and believing
in us, even as it demandseverything of us.
The journey has our backs, myfriends, even and especially
(20:18):
when we don't want it to, evenmore than we do, and that felt
important to share today.
Life is a journey, my friends,and that journey has our backs.
It's time to start living likeit.
Thanks again for being here.
Please send any questions thatyou have to info at
thejournibluprintcom and I willsee you in the next podcast.
Hello everyone and welcome back.
I'm so glad you're here.
I want to tell you about aconversation I had recently with
the writing group and before Iget too far into it, I can
already tell I feel reallystrongly about the topic that
came up through thisconversation and sometimes, as I
talk about things that I feelpretty strongly about, it comes
out in my voice.
(00:28):
I can tell that I speak alittle differently when I talk
about it, but it's important andit's going to touch on some
pretty tender things for somepeople.
I think it does for me anyway,as I talk about this.
So I just want to mention thatbefore we get started.
This conversation was with awriting group.
It was a group of authors and Iwas talking to them about ways
(00:50):
that they can use the journeymodel as a way to bring
authenticity into their writing.
It was a lovely discussion andthere were a lot of fun
connections that could be made,as I invited these authors to
use their own experiences of thedifferent steps in the journey,
especially their emotionalexperiences, to create
characters that are believable,that resonate with the reader,
and during the presentation Imentioned in almost an offhand
(01:13):
and a comment that the journeyhas our backs.
And when I said that, and thenlater in the discussion that we
had at the end, there was oneauthor in particular that caught
hold of that statement, and Icould tell that he was actually
struggling with it, and the morethat he shared with the group,
the more it became clear that hejust couldn't believe it.
For him, if the journey had hisback, then he would have had
(01:36):
the success that he had beenlooking for.
The people who could launch hiscareer would have shown up if
the journey had his back.
If the journey had his back,things would be working the way
he wanted, and they weren't.
Therefore, the journey couldn'thave his back because things
were different than the way hewanted them to be, and it was
really difficult for him toaccept this idea that the
(01:57):
journey is looking out for us,and I think, especially if we're
experiencing a lot of reallyhard things, it can feel very
much like the journey doesn'thave our backs, that the
opposite is actually true.
However, I feel very stronglythat not only does the journey
have our back, but it actuallyhas our backs better than we do,
(02:19):
and I'll explain what I mean bythat, but that's what we're
going to talk about today, andagain I'm going to talk about
the journey as though it hasintelligence, because I believe
it does, and I think giving thejourney the qualities of an
intelligent entity can give usthe ability to relate to it in a
way that allows us to have arelationship or insight with it.
(02:41):
And that may not work foreveryone, and I totally
understand that, but it might bean interesting thought
experiment if you're willing tocome with me for the next few
minutes.
So when I say that the journeyhas our backs, what exactly does
that mean?
Well, practically speaking, oneway that it shows up is by
(03:01):
guaranteeing that we have to goall the way through the journey.
It in fact, in some ways leavesus no other choice.
Each of the steps in thejourney process is deliberate
and it's necessary it's includedto ensure that we actually
change and become better Now ashuman beings and so much of this
(03:22):
is human behavior and humanthought processes versus the
journey.
But as humans, we actuallyoften want to skip steps.
We want to jump over the hardparts and given our opportunity,
we probably would.
But the journey knows that ifwe skip steps, it would deprive
(03:43):
us of the experiences that weneed.
But the journey knows thatdoing so would deprive us of the
experiences that we actuallyneed.
It knows that this is the way,and that's not the only way.
Another way that the journeyhas our back is that in our fear
(04:03):
and our weakness and ourfrustration.
If we choose to continue down apath that is not for our
greater good, by refusing thechange in the abyss, or refusing
to learn during the trials andtemptations, the journey will
continue to bring theopportunity to us to choose
differently, over and over andover, even, and maybe especially
(04:28):
, when we don't want it to.
Another way that it shows upfor us is that it appears to
know the end from the beginning.
It knows the bigger picture ofthe best version of ourselves,
and that's a vision that wedon't have.
And I want to dig in just alittle bit deeper into what
having our backs can look likewith that lens, because, when it
(04:48):
comes to journeys, we have toremember that the journey exists
as a mechanism for becoming thebest possible version of
ourselves, and the ebb and theflow of building up and breaking
down the pathway to being ourgenuine selves comes through
these experiences, theseexperiences that change us
(05:10):
permanently.
And with that understanding, wealso have to remember that at
the beginning of the journey wehave our limited, lacking
understanding.
As the call comes to us, we seein front of us possibilities
based on what we can currentlysee.
So let me give you an exampleto see if I can demonstrate this
(05:30):
.
We'll take Harry Potter when hiscall comes at the beginning of
his journey.
We're talking about the verybeginning of the first book.
All Harry knows is that he isbeing invited to come to a
wizarding school.
That's what the invitation says.
He doesn't really know whatthat means.
(05:51):
All he knows is that it will beaway from the miserable home
life he's used to.
He knows nothing about magic.
He knows nothing about wizards.
He didn't know there was aschool.
He just knows it will be awayfrom where he is and where he
has been unhappy.
The path that he can see aheadof him is to go to a school and
(06:14):
supposedly become a wizard Again, not that he even knows what
that means, but that's what'sgiven to him.
That's what he can see Now, atthis point.
If someone had told Harry thathis journey would be to defeat
Lord Voldemort and the DeathEaters through destroying
Horcruxes and castingExpelliarmus, ejecting the wand
(06:35):
from Voldemort's hand into hisown as the killing curse
rebounded off his body.
He would have no clue what theywere talking about None.
The actual end of his journeywas literally incomprehensible
for him.
He didn't have the ability tounderstand what was coming, what
(06:57):
lay ahead of him.
He knew nothing of magic, hedidn't know specific spells, he
had no idea who Voldemort was.
The knowledge and theexperience that he was going to
need were going to come throughthe journey, and he had no way
of knowing that.
And this happens to us so often.
(07:17):
There's an opportunity thatcomes up and we see a potential
outcome that we think is notonly the most likely but also
the best possible outcome, andwe embark on the journey
believing that we can see theend from the beginning.
This could be in applying for ajob, it could be in starting a
relationship, it could be inhaving children, it could be
(07:37):
going to school.
There's all sorts of ways thatwe think this journey should end
.
The problem is we can't see theend from the beginning.
We have no clue what ourjourney holds for us Because,
just like Harry, we don't haveany way to comprehend that which
(08:01):
we have no experience with,that which we've never
encountered, that which we canonly understand after the
journey is over, andunfortunately, we tend to anchor
ourselves on the way that weperceive at the beginning that
the journey should play out,before we know any of the things
that we're going to need toknow.
But I want to talk aboutanchoring for just a second.
(08:23):
If you've never heard ofanchoring before, it's really
worth taking a moment to talkabout what it means, because it
actually affects us a lot in ourday-to-day living.
Anchoring in terms of acognitive bias because that's
what it is describes people'stendency to rely too heavily on
the first piece of informationthat they receive on a topic.
(08:44):
So, whether or not thatinformation is accurate, people
use it as a reference point oranchor that's why it's called
anchoring to make subsequentjudgments about that situation.
So let's say, for example, thatyou are wanting to buy a
certain car and let's say thatthe first price that you hear
for that car is $10,000.
This number let's just say itcame from a friend that was
(09:07):
guessing how much the car mightbe worth.
Now you have no idea if thisnumber is realistic at all, but
each time you hear a subsequentnumber about how much that car
would cost, the tendency will beto compare it to $10,000.
Anything under $10,000 willseem like a deal.
Anything over $10,000 will seemtoo expensive.
(09:29):
Now, this is true even if theactual value of the car is,
let's say, $15,000, where$12,000 compared to $15,000
seems like a deal.
If you are anchored at $10,000,it will be hard to feel like
$12,000 is a deal.
Hopefully that makes sense.
(09:50):
Wherever we anchor ourselves, wewill compare that at any given
moment to new information thatcomes in.
That becomes the baseline thatwe compare things to.
So when we stand at thebeginning of our journeys, we
anchor ourselves in whatever wethink the outcome should be.
At that moment it becomes ourgauge for success.
(10:12):
But what we were thinking thejourney should be is totally
different than what it'sactually about.
Anything else might actuallyseem disappointing because of
where we're anchored.
If we don't get that job, if wedon't write a bestseller, if we
don't get the investment money,whatever it is, we feel like
(10:35):
we've somehow been let down.
And the solution here isactually to recognize our
anchors, to look at where we'refeeling disappointed or like
we're not getting the best dealand see if we can tell where
those anchors are and, ifpossible, re-anchor to more
realistic, more reliable or morecorrect information.
(10:59):
So back to the journey here.
One of the reasons people thinkthat the journey doesn't have
their back is because of thatinitial anchor.
They think they know what thejourney is supposed to be about
and, honestly, chances are verygood that they don't.
They don't have any idea whatthe journey is about Because
(11:20):
they can't, not until thejourney's over.
And yet they judge the journeyagainst this anchor and they
feel like they've been let downor, even worse, that the journey
itself has abandoned them.
What we're really saying inthose moments is that if the
journey doesn't turn out the waywe think it should, that means
that the journey doesn't haveour back, and that's where I
(11:42):
want us to be careful Again.
I understand when it's hard.
It can be very difficult to seethis, but we put such rigid
boundaries around what we see asa singular, acceptable outcome
that we see everything else asfailure and can feel abandoned.
If the journey really caredabout me, it would make sure I
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get what I want, and I am not inany way chastising or judging
these thoughts.
They are totally normal andthey follow absolutely the way
our brains work.
But hopefully you can see howthese thoughts can be very
limiting and they cansignificantly alter our
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willingness to partner with thejourney.
Because, you see, the journeywants the best for us, the
actual best, the real best, thebest that will take us closer to
the person we're capable ofbecoming.
It's a kind of love that runsvery deep and with it the
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understanding that sometimeswhat we want will keep us stuck,
stuck in our patterns, stuck inour habits, stuck in our fears.
The journey wants so much morefor us.
And to bring in a little from myyoga studies, there is a Hindu
god named Kali that demonstratesthis kind of love.
(13:10):
One of my teachers, as Istudied to become a yoga
therapist, spoke of Kali in thisway and it really resonated
with me.
So, with all respect toward thetraditions and lore of Kali,
this version is the one that I'mgoing to be using today, the
one that this teacher taught me.
In this interpretation of thisgoddess, we look at her as an
archetype, a core myth thatrepresents some deep and
(13:33):
universal truths.
In this case, kali is fierce.
Her visage is frightening.
She has 10 arms that she usesto kill and to destroy.
Her eyes are red like fire.
Her tongue is extended,although she's exuding a breath
of fire and to look at her canbe frightening.
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In fact she is never notfrightening, and that fear only
debins when you come tounderstand the destruction that
she's capable of.
But Kali's archetype is not justdestruction.
It's also transformation andtranscendence.
She is the goddess of love andprotection.
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You see, she loves us sofiercely and so deeply that she
is unwilling to allow us to stayin our self-deceptions, in our
limiting beliefs.
It's with her 10 arms that shecomes to slay our demons, and
she does not pull her punches Tobring to light.
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That which holds us down whenshe would have us rise is
exactly where she lives.
She fearlessly takes what weare afraid to let go of,
destroying our old selfviolently if that's what it must
be so that the new self can beborn, and I love this idea.
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It's so much like the journeythat I've come to know.
The journey knows and sees thebest of us.
It is committed to seeing thatbest come to its realization,
even if it means that we must gothrough a difficult, painful,
transformative process to getthere.
The journey will ask of usthose things that we hold most
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tightly, especially if thosethings are holding us back.
It will provide the samelessons over and over and over
again.
As long as we refuse to learnthem, the journey will continue
to bring them back.
In fact, pema Children talksabout this in such a beautiful
way In her book when Things FallApart.
She said nothing ever goes awayuntil it has taught us what we
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need to know.
If we run 100 miles an hour tothe other end of the continent
in order to get away from theobstacle, we find the very same
problem waiting for us when wearrive.
It just keeps returning withnew names, forms, manifestations
, until we learn whatever it hasto teach us about where we are
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separating ourselves fromreality, how we are pulling back
instead of opening up, closingdown instead of allowing
ourselves to experience fullywhatever we encounter, without
hesitating or retreating intoourselves.
I was so struck when I firstread that nothing ever goes away
until it's taught us what weneed to know, that we do have
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multiple opportunities to learnthe lessons that the journey has
for us.
This is, I think, one of thedifficult truths of journeys.
There's more than one, but thisis most certainly one of them.
The journey is not content toleave us in our weaknesses, in
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our deceptions in our fears.
It cares about us too much forthat to happen.
It will hold these lessons forus, painfully and brutally, if
that's what it takes in orderfor us to finally be free of
what's holding us back, nomatter how blind we are, how
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desperately we hold onto thatwhich harms us, the journey does
not give up on us.
It will bring us these lessonsover and over and over and over,
giving us chance after chanceafter chance after chance to be
truly and finally free ofeverything that is not us.
(17:41):
So when I say that the journeyhas our back, I say it with a
reverence for all the thingsthat our limited perspective
prevents us from seeing.
I know that, left to my own, Iwould, because of my human
nature, choose to stay in mycomfort zone.
I would choose to take the easyroute that doesn't require
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change.
But if that happens, I reallynever have a chance to become
the best version of myself,because it isn't in my nature
for most of us as well to do iton my own.
There's so much I would miss,so much I wouldn't be able to
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experience, so much that couldhave changed me, freed me, if
only I had been able to let it.
And with that same reverence, Iacknowledge how hard this is.
It's easy for me to say thisfrom this point in my life where
I'm able to see certain thingsrelatively clearly.
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But I know it's hard.
I know how deeply and painfullyand terribly hard that these
journeys can be.
And the fact that the journeyhas our back is little comfort.
When we grieve, when weexperience loss, when our very
identity is shattered into amillion pieces, I know, I
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promise I know, and in no waywould I want to try to dismiss
any of those things, becauseit's often in those tender,
vulnerable, soul-searing momentsthat we're able to see the
world and ourselves as we trulyare.
But maybe, just maybe, havingthat knowing somewhere in the
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back of our minds as we suffercan give us the strength to hold
on just a little longer, tobreathe once more, and then once
more, and then once more.
Journeys are not for the fate ofheart, my friends.
They will require everything ofus.
But knowing that this is thesacrifice for becoming our true,
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amazing, wonderful,world-changing selves, at some
point we'll be able to look backand see the divine hand of the
journey picking us up, carryingus, comforting us and believing
in us, even as it demandseverything of us.
The journey has our backs, myfriends, even and especially
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when we don't want it to, evenmore than we do, and that felt
important to share today.
Life is a journey, my friends,and that journey has our backs.
It's time to start living likeit.
Thanks again for being here.
Please send any questions thatyou have to info at
thejournibluprintcom and I willsee you in the next podcast.
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