The Julie Bender Show

It's Time To Get (More) Consistent (Without Being Too Hardcore)

I found myself craving more consistency because I know it makes me feel more confident and at peace in life, but I also didn't feel the need to launch an intense program (read, 75Hard, or the like). Was there a way to set some goals without becoming too overwhelmed? I created one. I share a simple tracker tool I created to help me be more consistent in the key ...

Is your friend newly widowed? There are some things to do and say, and several to avoid.

I have been asked countless times how to help a friend who was suddenly widowed. My heart aches remembering the pain I experienced and know there are some practical things that truly do help and many that cause more pain than good. I include wisdom from four of my friends who were also widowed (young), hoping to offer insight into this hard lif...

Welcome to my birthday party episode!

In celebration of my 39th birthday, I took a personal inventory of lessons I've learned that have served and continue to serve me, and I hope to not forget as I close out my thirties this year! They cover all areas of my life and hopefully will serve to encourage, entertain and maybe even challenge you, too!

Get the full show notes with the full list, ALL the links, books, and resources he...

Every Relationship Has Conflict—But Is it Healthy?

If you’re going to be married, you’re going to have conflict. It’s a nice way of saying, you will fight. But can you learn to do it fairly? With respect? Can your conflicts actually build into instead of breaking down your marriage? With prayer and intention, yes. I give several steps that this requires and then we pray for God to show us the way (end empower us to walk in it!).

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Relax and Reset With These Faves
With the kickoff to summer happening N O W I wanted to drop some recommendations in your feed for books, podcasts, bible reading plans, and TV shows I love. Perfect for those travel or lazy days we all hope to get in this much-anticipated season.

For this episode, you need to click to get the full show notes with ALL the links, books, and resources here.

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What If You Had to Advocate For Your Spouse's Life?

I know what it's like to stand at your husband's bedside, preparing for him to leave this earth. Karen Wilkinson has experienced the stress and pressure of fighting for her husband through a medical crisis, advocating for what he wanted, and they have both lived to tell the story. Her desire is to encourage us to be prepared to face a trial of this kind, while also...

Sex Isn't Just For Him. You Deserve Pleasure, Too.

In my first marriage (straight out of purity culture!) I didn't enjoy sex. I thought it was my duty, but I wasn't very good at it and didn't desire it. But then I found excitement and passion in my new marriage, so I know (from experience!) that a woman's sex drive can be transformed. We just need education and encouragement to learn and try new things. I interv...

You Can’t Pray For Him ‘Til You Pray For Yourself

We’re going back to the basics of #prayingforyourhusbanddaily. As much as I strongly encourage you to fervently and faithfully pray for your husband, none of it will be effective unless you pray this prayer for yourself, first. Get ready, this one hits deep, but oh, how freeing it will be. Well, at least it was for me. In this episode, you will hear a truly vulnerable prayer I n...

It's Time To Lower the Bar

Hear me out. Your expectations are far too high, so it's time to lower the bar. You deserve the chance to step back, review all the roles you play and the hats you wear, and reassess how you're showing up. It's likely time to give yourself some grace, lowering your standards to an achievable level and simultaneously acknowledging your incredible wins and contributions in countless places. ...

Maybe it's just a funk, maybe it's more.

In this vulnerable episode, I reveal how I've been feeling "off", taking my personal reflections to the mic to process. Am I dealing with depression? Just a hard season? More importantly, what am I doing to take care of myself during it, and what can you try, too? I share practical ways I'm facing my funk, and what I'm vowing to avoid from here on out as well. I...

His Work-Life Needs Prayer

Now #prayingforyourhusbanddaily comes to your earbuds! First, we will talk about the many reasons you should pray for your husband's work, and then we will actually spend time praying for him. This is the first of forthcoming episodes for the wifey (or wanna-be-wifey) who wants to intentionally invest in her husband and marriage but needs a little guidance and encouragement for how.

Don't miss the previou...

Don't You Love a Good Story?

You've heard me encourage you to "go all in on your story." In this episode, I talk to author Bob Wheatley about how all stories are pointing back to one grand narrative, and why that is a good thing. We also discuss how our individual stories relate to the best one ever told.

More about Bob

Bob is an author, podcaster, and former professional athlete. He serves as a co-host o...

People like birth stories, right?

I rope D into "testing my mic" and then going back in time to tell our birth story and what it's been like adjusting to life with a new baby in the family. We talk labor, delivery, early challenges, and more in this candid convo. We also tease what might be coming in future episodes with my favorite person!

Don't miss the previous episodes I mentioned:

Hear me and D share our love story he...

We're BACK!

I'm so excited to be in your feed after taking a break to welcome and adjust to life with my new baby girl, Reverie. In this short episode, we catch up and look ahead to what you can expect on Season 2 of #thejuliebendershow.

Find the #prayingforyourhusbandaily video I mentioned here. 

Grab the book I mentioned on codependency here.
Find the full show archive on my website here or in apple podcasts, he...

We’re counting down to our baby joining the Bender fam! Before I take an undetermined amount of time off with our new babe, I  sat down with my two fav dudes to record our thoughts and feelings as we wait. Lincoln tells us what he’s looking forward to about being a brother, and D and I talk candidly about some of the struggles and challenges we’ve experienced in our marriage during pregnancy. This one is sentimental and real. I hop...

Your Past Is Not Your Prison, It's Your University

The affirmation "My Past Does Not Define Me" is one I'm begging you to embrace, while fully acknowledging I am needing to heed this advice! When you live life as though you are a victim of your past, you're running from it or doing everything in your power to hide or cover it, you are not truly living. Certainly, you're not embracing my hope for you, #beboldandjustbeyou. I...

Have you ever been affected by toxic positivity?

Do you have past trauma that you cover with "I'm fine", "it made me stronger" or other cliché phrases that aren't actually true of you, because healing hasn't yet been found? My guest Marissa Baker can relate. If you're on TikTok, you may have heard of the Life Coach who was being discredited for being divorced twice by the age of 30. Well, she's here to share the full story and how ...

What if it's wonderful?

Do you struggle to rejoice with those who rejoice, especially when you're mourning or dealing with loss?
Does it seem hard or scary to celebrate at times? Many of us have felt that—myself included. That's why I wanted to chat with therapist and author Nicole Zasowski about her newest book and how she learned to ask this question which changed the way she interacted within community and in her own relatio...

Being > Doing

The affirmation "I am enough, so I don't have to perform" is one I am still practicing believing. And that's okay. Many women struggle to trust that their value isn't derived from their performance but instead, it’s bestowed on them by their creator and doesn’t have to be “earned.” So much of our stress, insecurity, and relational conflict comes from this struggle so I invite you to consider applying this ...