BEST OF SEASON 3: Forgiveness is a Choice: A Kandid Chat on the Illusion of Mandatory Forgiveness w/Michelle Agopsowitz

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Have you ever felt the heavy weight of being told to forgive when your heart wasn't ready? Join me, as I engage in an enlightening conversation with  Counselor, Reiki Master, and the Founder of Illuminated Path Counseling, Michelle Agopsowicz. 
Together, we get kandid about toxic forgiveness and how societal norms rush us into a reconciliation that may not serve our healing. 

 The Stats:
In a poll conducted in the Kandidly Speaking Facebook group, participants were asked if they felt pressured to forgive someone before they were emotionally ready. The results showed that:
 67% answered "Yes," 
32% answered "No, I only forgive when I am ready," 
1% responded, "Maybe, not sure what that means."

Key Takeaways:

• Toxic forgiveness occurs in relationships where individuals feel pressured or manipulated to forgive
• Forgiveness is a personal and organic process and there should be NOshame in not forgiving
• Some events may be unforgivable and sacred anger is a natural response to them such as racism, misogyny, war, sexual abuse, and physical abuse.
• Forgiveness is not always necessary to move forward, and one is not a lesser person for not forgiving
• Toxic positivity can result in denying one's feelings and negative physical and emotional effects such as depression, anxiety, anger, and bitterness.
• Healthy forgiveness is found on an individual's terms,  it may take time to reach, and is different for everyone
• Setting boundaries and communication is important in forgiveness
• Forgiveness can come in unexpected ways 
• The importance of holding space for people instead of offering advice and trying to fix their problems.

This isn't just about letting go; it's about understanding when holding on to 'sacred anger' is valid and justified. 
We discuss the importance of recognizing our own trauma responses and why forgiveness is not always a prerequisite for moving on.  
Michelle reminds us that forgiveness is not an obligation, nor does it quantify our kindness or spiritual growth. 
For those working to overcome toxic forgiveness, focus on grounding yourself, reclaiming your energy through breathing, and setting boundaries in a gentle and empathetic manner. 
If you're trying to help someone learn to support them on their journey without imposing your own timeline or discomfort by creating a safe space for the person and acknowledging their pain!
This episode is a powerful affirmation that your healing is yours alone, and it's perfectly okay for it to unfold on your terms, with or without forgiveness!

Guest Contact information:

https://www.facebook.com/IlluminatedPathCounselling/
https://youtube.com/@illuminatedpathcounselling
https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-agopsowicz-a74672219
https://www.illuminatedpathcounselling.com/

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Intro Music by: Anthony Nelson aka BUSS
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