May 15, 2025 • 32 mins
Tattoo needles aren't just tools for self-expression—they can be instruments of profound healing. Kelsie Shriver, owner of Luminary Tattoo in Lincoln, Nebraska, demonstrates this transformative power through her work covering self-harm scars and mastectomy sites with beautiful artwork.
Drawing from eight years of tattoo experience and her background as a portrait artist, Kelsie offers affordable $50 flat-rate cover-up sessions for self-harm survivors—services that would normally cost around $600. What began as a simple TikTok offer blossomed into something greater when community members like her neighbor Dan stepped up to sponsor free sessions. "It gives people an option to rewrite their story," Kelsie explains, shifting the narrative from painful memories to artistic expression.
The conversation delves deeply into understanding self-harm as a maladaptive coping mechanism for overwhelming emotions, where physical pain temporarily drowns out emotional suffering. For those carrying these visible reminders, daily life becomes a minefield of unwanted questions and judgments that perpetuate shame and isolation. Through Kelsie's compassionate approach, clients transform these painful markers into conversation pieces of their choosing—beautiful images that celebrate resilience rather than trauma. Beyond self-harm work, Kelsie also creates 3D nipple tattoos for mastectomy patients, marking celebratory final steps in cancer recovery journeys.
Here are the details for the scar cover-up.
“The $50 scar coverup offer will be a monthly drawing, where a name will be drawn out of a hat for that month after signing up via email.
To enter for the drawing, please email shriver.kelsie.tattoos@gmail.com with the subject line “Scar Covers”.
Ideally, this will be a 4 hour tattoo or less, retail-valued at $600, and is only for one day of tattooing. Winners will be notified via email and have 3 days to reply with the requested information to schedule.”
If you're struggling with thoughts of self-harm, contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by phone or text. And if you're ready to transform your scars into something beautiful, artists like Kelsie stand ready to help you reclaim your story. Share this episode with someone who might benefit from hearing that healing comes in many forms—sometimes through art permanently etched on the skin.
This podcast is a proud member of the Mayday Media Network. If you have an idea for a podcast and need some production assistance or have a podcast and are looking for a supportive network to join, check out maydaymedianetwork.com.
Like what you hear on the podcast? Follow our social media for more uplifting, inspirational and feel-good content.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well, hello there and welcome.
You are listening to theKindness Matters podcast and I
am your host, mike Rathbun.
What is this podcast all about?
It's about kindness.
It's a pushback againsteverything negative that we see
in the news and on social mediatoday, and it's a way to
(00:20):
highlight people, organizationsthat are simply striving to make
their little corner of theworld a little better place.
If you want to join in on theconversation, feel free Go ahead
and follow us on all of yoursocial media feeds.
We're on Facebook, instagram,tiktok.
We're even on LinkedIn underMike Rathbun.
(00:42):
Check us out.
We're even on LinkedIn underMike Rathbun.
Check us out and, in themeantime, sit back, relax, enjoy
and we'll get into the KindnessMatters podcast.
Hey, welcome everybody to theshow.
Thank you so much for taking 30minutes of your time today to
(01:04):
join us.
I have an amazing guest for youtoday.
As a reminder, if you seeanything or hear anything on
this podcast that you findinspiring or motivational or
uplifting, please make sure toshare it with your friends and
family, coworkers, completestrangers on the street, whoever
(01:26):
.
It would mean the world to meto have you share that with them
.
An important note here we wantto inform you that this episode
of the Kindness Matters podcastwill discuss sensitive topics,
including self-harm, mentalhealth issues and possibly
(01:47):
suicide.
These subjects may betriggering for some individuals.
Please, please, please, takecare of your emotional
well-being and consider whetheryou are in a safe space to
listen to this content.
If you find these topicsdistressing, you may wish to
skip this episode or listen witha trusted friend or a mental
health professional.
(02:08):
Your mental health is importantto us.
We encourage you to seeksupport if you need it.
Thank you for yourunderstanding.
My guest today is KelseyShriver, an incredibly talented
artist.
Shriver, an incredibly talentedartist and the owner of
(02:28):
Luminary Tattoo.
She's just opened her owntattoo shop in Lincoln, nebraska
, and welcome to the show,kelsey.
Thanks so much for being here.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Thank you so much for having me, Mike.
It's gosh you're just such ablast to talk to.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Um, so are you?
Thank you, uh, and, and thereason?
Well, first of all, let's talkabout tattoo, because that's a
nice, calming, um, non heavysubject.
Right, because and I say you'rean artist, because tattoo is
(03:08):
artistry, right, you're just,instead of working with paints
and canvases, you're workingwith ink and a different kind of
canvas a body.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Yes, we all go into it with some form of artistic
background.
I was a portrait artist foryears before I started tattooing
, just kind of as like a littleside hustle outside of like
(03:42):
full-time jobs, and then got waymore serious around the time
that I started approaching mymentor for an apprenticeship.
Ah All of us have some sort oflike art background.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Okay, and we all have mentors at some point or
another right.
Speaker 2 (03:59):
In theory.
There are some people that doget into it like self-taught,
just kind of picking things uplike out of their house.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
But a lot of us did go through like a formal
apprenticeship under a mentor.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
Yeah, I'm just saying I don't think I could find a
YouTube video about tattooingand do any kind of good work.
It takes a long time to reallystart to get it down.
I mean, I've been doing iteight years and there are
artists, that I look at theirstuff and I'm like, oh, am I
ever going to hit that level?
Because that is amazing.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Yeah, for sure.
So you started about eightyears ago as an intern.
Is that correct?
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Yes.
Oh sorry, go on.
No, you're fine, Go ahead.
Yeah, I started gettingtattooed by Cody Schneider that
owns Scarlet Raven Tattoo, alsoin Lincoln, nebraska, pretty
close by where I just openedluminary.
Um, I got my first tattoo fromhim when I was 17.
My mom signed off for it andover the course of the next like
(05:15):
six years, um, I just wouldbring my art portfolio to him,
get his advice and his feedback,try to learn from it, and then
eventually, in 2017, I thinkthat was June of 2017, started
pre-apprenticing, which was kindof just going into the shop,
(05:37):
answering phones, cleaning,watching how he would set up for
tattoos, watching him dotattoos, and then we made it
official about a month later.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Nice, I was going to say.
What does an intern tattoo?
What does that look like?
You're basically learningeverything about the shop right
and the art.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Yeah.
So my apprenticeship which Ithink from what I understand
everybody's is a little bitdifferent Mine was, yeah,
helping set up, talking toclients that would come in the
cleaning, taking trash out, allthat kind of stuff, but then
(06:21):
also he gave me like a stack ofreading materials to kind of go
through and for as poorly as Idid in high school, just because
I was one of those kids thatwas like, man, I don't care
about anything that I have tolearn right now if I care.
I am such an overachiever aboutit and I still have my little
(06:42):
composition book where I likehave diagrams of tattoo machines
with notes on like how to takethem apart, put them back
together, all of the bloodbornepathogens, information for like
the testing and study course forthat.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
First aid and still have that and I think I've got
it in the shop right now as aresource for the apprentice that
I have.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
And now you have your own apprentice.
Yes, it's come full circle.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
It has.
That's so fun, but yeah, theneventually kind of got into
tattooing on like practice skinsunder guidance of my mentor and
graduated to real people.
After getting all of my likestate and county licensing
figured out and just kind ofthat.
(07:35):
I knew for a while be likehuman guinea pigs to see how it
went on real skin okay, becauseyou had you said something there
and I immediately froze and Istopped listening.
Practice skins yeah, they'relike this weird rubbery kind of
material and they just come inlike flat pieces.
(07:57):
They also have things called uhthe brand is pound of flesh and
they're like synthetic bodyparts, which that's really
interesting.
I had clear drawers in my roomat Scarlet Raven and just a
forearm wrapped in plastic thatwas for practicing tattooing and
(08:17):
I was like I probably look likea serial killer right now you
know, like do people call youdexter?
thankfully not oh, good, goodlook at it and be like, uh, what
is that why?
Why do you have an arm in aplastic drawer?
Speaker 1 (08:37):
and now I'm just like wondering if, years and years
and years ago, before they hadpractice skins, did they like go
down to the morgue and ask touse a corpse?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I don't know so you actually uh fruits, a lot of
fruits that have skins, likeoranges, bananas, melons and
things like that.
You can practice on those and Ihave not, but from what I've
heard, it's pretty comparable.
There also are people that havegone to like butchers and asked
for pigskin fair enough, yeahalso similar from what I've
(09:16):
heard.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
Yeah, I yep, that seems more, much more reasonable
yeah we are not going into themorgue.
It might be an option, I don'tknow.
So, and the reason, the reasonI'm talking to you today is
(09:39):
because I saw a post that youhad on on Facebook not Facebook
TikTok, I believe it was yes,and it had a lot to deal with
mental health and,coincidentally, may is mental
health awareness month, so itwas oh, let me see if I can pull
(09:59):
a big word out of my fortuitousthat I should see your, your,
your, tiktok, um, because we'retalking about you.
Do something for people who haveself-harm yes and when we talk
(10:22):
about self-harm, um, I had and Iis, I don't know, is this
fairly recent, I mean likewithin the last 50 years that
people have started doing this?
Speaker 2 (10:38):
I honestly don't know .
Um, I know that it's been likeit's been a thing that people
have used as a maladaptivecoping mechanism.
For longer than I've been aliveI've covered scars for people
that are older than I am.
Like the scars are older than Iam and more obviously faded in
(11:04):
those cases and a little easierto cover up.
But I do feel like specificallyin the last maybe 20 years, it
kind of became a more commonthing.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Yeah, oh yeah, I mean because self-harm comes from
anxiety, depression.
What are some of the Hellokitty?
Speaker 2 (11:35):
Sorry, that's probably Dutch.
He likes to yell.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
So and you said something, you said maladaptive,
and I was looking up the causesof self-harm and one of the
things, one of the definitions Igot was it's a Usually the
result of an inability to copein healthy ways with stress and
emotional pain.
Yeah, Does that ring true foryou?
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Okay, and then there was two actually.
And the other one said having ahard time controlling,
expressing or understandingemotions may lead to self-injury
.
The mix of emotions thattrigger self-injury is complex.
For example, there may befeelings of worthlessness,
lowliness, panic, anger, guilt,rejection, self-hatred, being
(12:39):
bullied or having questionsabout your sexual identity may
all be part of that mix ofemotions.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
And I found it interesting because oftentimes
when people will self-harm andwe'll get into what that looks
like in a second but they'll seethose scars and then that will
make them feel regret or ashamed, which may trigger another
(13:09):
self-harm episode.
Is that right?
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Yeah, and then I mean you walk around out in public
with them visibly on display andoccasionally people will ask
about it or like, specifically,what I've seen a lot of is like
a lot of young kids that justdon't understand that will
acknowledge it.
(13:33):
Um, I had one of my emails.
Actually, there was anindividual that was talking
about having scars acknowledgedby a small kid and being like,
yeah, I want to fight with atiger, um, but you, yeah, having
to like either deflect oracknowledge that publicly as
(13:55):
well, to like strangers orpeople that you know yeah, and
then having to like walk backthrough that is something that
also can be triggering for a lotof people.
Yeah, and then having to likewalk back through that is
something that also can betriggering for a lot of people.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Yeah, so it's like a self-perpetuating kind of thing.
Yeah, and the types ofself-harm I know I think a
fairly common one is cuttingright.
Yes, I think a fairly commonone is cutting right.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
Okay, and what is?
Do you know what that lookslike?
I mean, are you, you'refamiliar with it?
Did you engage in that?
Speaker 2 (14:42):
That was the form that I used when I was younger,
but no other people as well thateither like, did that in
conjunction with orindependently, um would burn or
hit or things like that as wellnow is this something like
hitting a wall when we say hitlike hitting themselves oh I've
(15:05):
encountered a handful of peoplethat, like that was kind of
their form of it, which I feellike leaves a more obvious um
visibility in the moment buttends to have less of the
long-term visibility in the waythat, like cutting or burning
(15:26):
does.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Right, but now a lot of times, not a lot of times.
Sometimes, self-harm can be away of signaling that you are
trying to reach out for help,can it not?
Speaker 2 (15:42):
Oh, it absolutely can .
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Kind of that like silent cry for help, can it not?
Oh, it absolutely can.
Kind of that like silent cryfor help?
Yeah, for sure.
Um, and I, I was wondering why.
You know why?
What?
What does what does the act ofburning yourself or cutting,
what does that is?
(16:08):
Does it bring a relief?
Does it bring a what?
Speaker 2 (16:13):
in the days where that was a coping mechanism that
I was using.
Um, it was a lot of like what Iam feeling emotionally is so
overwhelming and unbearable thatlike this will.
This is a feeling that isn'temotional.
(16:35):
That's going to distract mefrom that.
Um, and yeah, did kind of havelike a little bit of a sense of
relief in just even if it wasfor like a couple minutes not
thinking about what else wasgoing on.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
Right.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
Like almost kind of a and this is maybe a poor
comparison to make, but I hadseen something on I think it was
Facebook a few days ago talkingabout like kind of the
grounding in like gettingtattooed and how it's something
that's like a physical thing,that like brings you back to
(17:20):
your body almost.
Interesting but it's like againthe most in the sense of
self-harm, like the worst waythat you can do that.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Yeah, yeah.
And I saw one again with whypeople do it.
And somebody said to feelsomething, anything, even if
it's physical pain, when they'refeeling emotionally empty.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
Wow, I can't imagine.
I mean I just I struggle withthat, but the feeling I have
never.
I don't think I've ever engagedin self-harm.
I've known people who neveradmitted it to me, but I know
(18:15):
that they did.
Speaker 2 (18:16):
Yeah, I've found that a lot of people don't really
like to talk about it, and it'ssomething that they just kind of
bury down and hope that otherpeople don't bring up, which,
again, having like those visiblescars makes it something that
gets brought up, which is why Idecided to kind of reach out and
(18:41):
offer the scar cover-ups inthat TikTok video.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
Yeah, that is so cool and I wasn't quite ready to go
there yet, but you did, so let'stalk about it.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You're fine Because really youknow what it's like to walk
around literally with thosescars.
Yes, Literally with those scars.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
And the fact that you're offering this service is
kind.
I mean, you charge for it, butit's a lot less than a regular
tattoo would cost.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yes, I am offering them for a $50 flat rate once a
(19:49):
month, typically, sohypothetically, if it's a four
hour tattoo, my in shop rate is150 an hour, so that's like a
$600 tattoo for $50 to make thatmore affordable.
Um, and the 50 is really justkind of covering my supplies and
everything that I'm going touse, although something that I
thought was super awesome andwas not anticipating when I made
that video is the number ofpeople that reached out and
asked if they could donate andpay that $50 cover for it, and I
actually it was a couple daysafter I had uploaded the video
(20:12):
my neighbor Dan, who is just afantastic person, clearly.
Yeah, we had talked in, I thinkMarch, about doing like 40
bucks a month for lawn carestuff at my house and he
approached me a couple daysafter I had uploaded the video,
(20:32):
told me that he watched it andthat he had everything covered
all summer long not to worryabout it and just to take that
and apply it to those scar covertattoos.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
And so like all summer pretty much, those are
just on my neighbor Dan for free.
Thanks, dan, dan is awesome.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
That's so cool and I mean okay, because back to
cutting for a second.
Oh yeah, I apologize.
Typically, the place you dothat is like an arm.
Is that correct?
Because back to cutting for asecond.
Oh yeah, I apologize.
Typically, the place you dothat is like an arm, Is that
correct?
It varies, thighs, I thinkthighs sometimes.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Yeah, I've seen a lot on like the arms and the thighs
, but I've also seen it ontorsos, like really everywhere
calves.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Wow, wow, okay so, and I guess maybe I'm struggling
to figure out how big of anarea we're talking about here,
and obviously it depends on howlong they were cutting right.
Yes, okay about here, andobviously it depends on how long
(21:48):
they were cutting.
Right, yes, okay, so whathelped you?
What helped you to stop cutting?
Speaker 2 (21:53):
honestly, I got into therapy pretty intensely back in
I think that was 2019, if Iremember right.
That helped a lot, but so didjust in my case.
I was like I don't want thathigh visibility.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
And I don't want people to like look at me, see
this and make assumptions basedon what they're seeing.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
Yeah, because they will right.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
I mean, that's how we are right.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Yeah, oh, that person's xyz yeah, it's
something that, like, I feellike leads to a lot of judgment
from others, which then kindkind of perpetuates the cycle of
self-hatred and things likethat.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Then you go back into the shame and the regret.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Yeah, it kind of leads to this vicious vicious
cycle.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
Yeah, for sure.
Now and I mean we've all hadour dealings with the medical
care in this country before.
Yes, and maybe somebody doesn'thave access to mental health
treatment.
What would you say to somebodythat you knew was cutting?
(23:21):
What can you do?
Just on a personal level?
Speaker 2 (23:25):
Yeah, I think on a personal level, really just
letting people know that likeyou're there and you care about
them and like you want goodthings for them, Like they've
got a support system and thatthe world is a better place with
them in it.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
Yes, don't give up.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Yeah, for sure, okay, but you didn't really stop at
cutting cover-ups, becauseyou've also done work with
mastectomy scars.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
Talk about that.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
I go, which I've taken a little bit of a break
from it this year since I'vebeen opening the shop, but I
have worked with Cody Schneiderat Scarlet Raven at Brian West
Hospital um doing 3d effectnipple tattoos for breast cancer
patients that have had to havefull mastectomies and are kind
(24:35):
of at the end of their cancertreatment journey.
It's sort of the last step inlike image recovery.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
So usually everybody is just having a great time on
those days because our patientsare like woohoo, we're done.
This is the last thing.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Yeah, you said.
Did you say soul mastectomies?
Maybe, not, maybe not.
I might have misheard.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
I may have misspoken something and said something
that sounded like that.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
Oh, I thought you said full mastectomy.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
Full.
Yes, that's exactly what it was.
Yeah, and so we're talking bothbreasts.
Yes, Now is this.
This is just for people whohave, who've had, reconstructive
surgery right.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Yes, that is the majority of patients that we see
and work with um and it kind of, from what I understand,
because we just show up intattoo but it's covered by their
insurance and everything.
Um, it is we at the beginning,and I think something in the
(25:52):
insurance industries likechanged in what they would cover
for people undergoing like topsurgeries for gender
reassignment and things likethat as well, where individuals
opted to just have everything,including the nipple removed, or
(26:14):
they would replace it and wewould repigment around it.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Okay, I was going to.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Oh sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you, no no,
keep going.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
I interrupted you.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I haven't gotten to do as many of those cases at the
hospital anymore, since theinsurance issues have become a
thing, but I've still taken afew of those at the shop as well
had the full mastectomy but notthe reconstruction.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Or, as you mentioned, gender reassignment surgery,
where they've had mastectomy andI mean, if you're going one way
, you don't really want to do areconstruction, but yeah, that's
.
And I was going to ask if youhad done any of that type of
(27:12):
work as well, because it's justthe chest right.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Yes, I haven't gotten to do one of like the full
chest scar covers yet for those.
I have done a lot of scarcovers that are more like kind
of in that vein for like breastreduction implants, other
surgical scars, even some likepeople that have gone through
(27:39):
surgeries for skin cancer andthings like that where they've
got big scars left behind.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Never even thought of that one.
Melanomas, or what have you Wow, or what have you Wow.
And it's just such anopportunity to create something
beautiful.
Where once there was somethingI don't want to say ugly,
because I mean that's part ofwho they were, but you know
(28:05):
where once there was a reminder,and maybe not a very happy
reminder.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Yeah, I feel like the scar cover work in general just
kind of gives people an optionto like rewrite their story and
instead of people looking atthat part of their body and
being like, oh, what happenedthere yeah, you get to be like
oh what a pretty, a prettytattoo yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
Is that the south of France, a unicorn?
Speaker 2 (28:36):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Nice, Nice.
Well, we want to.
Both Kelsey and I would like toremind you that if you are
feeling like harming yourself,or if you're feeling destitute
or like there are no otheroptions, please make sure to
reach out and call 988.
(28:59):
That's the new suicideprevention hotline.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I think yes, and I believe they have a text line.
Oh, it's that same number, if Iremember right.
I have cards at the shop thathave the text line on it as well
, for people that hate talkingon the phone.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
Okay, no, I'm not going to do that.
I'm on the 988 website and Iwanted to look and see if I
could find the text line, textline, and there's a link here
that says text, and I started toclick it and it's like, okay,
(29:48):
what do you need?
Are you feeling helpless?
But, yes, 988 for sure.
If you're feeling in that kindof place, it was so awesome to
talk to you today, kelsey.
I really, really, reallyappreciate your time and what
you're doing for people who needit.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Yes, I appreciate you having me on and trying to help
me spread that reach to people.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
So many people need the services that you're
providing and I mean it's sadthat they need that or that
there are that many people thatneed it, but thankfully there
are people.
If you're in the Lincoln,nebraska area, omaha, grand
Island, worms, nebraska I had tothrow that one in.
(30:33):
You know what it's not that far.
Go see Kelsey and she can getyou hooked up.
I will have links to yourwebsite and all of your social
media on the show notes, and Ihope you have a fantastic week.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
Awesome, thank you so much.
I hope you have a great week.
Awesome, thank you so much.
I hope you have a great weektoo.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
I will Take care, kelsey.
We'll talk again soon.
I want to thank you for takingthis time to listen to this
episode with my guest, kelseySchreiber.
Please make sure to check outthe show notes, where you'll
find additional information onher offer to cover up self-harm
scars.
I hope you're able to takesomething positive from the time
(31:18):
that you spent with us.
Maybe you'll be inspired, maybeyou'll be motivated, maybe
you'll be moved.
If you experienced any of thosepositive feelings, please
consider sharing this podcastwith your friends and family.
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Email me, leave me a message onthe socials.
(31:41):
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You've been listening to theKindness Matters Podcast.
I'm your host, mike Rathbun.
Have a fantastic week.
Well, hello there and welcome.
You are listening to theKindness Matters podcast and I
am your host, mike Rathbun.
What is this podcast all about?
It's about kindness.
It's a pushback againsteverything negative that we see
in the news and on social mediatoday, and it's a way to
(00:20):
highlight people, organizationsthat are simply striving to make
their little corner of theworld a little better place.
If you want to join in on theconversation, feel free Go ahead
and follow us on all of yoursocial media feeds.
We're on Facebook, instagram,tiktok.
We're even on LinkedIn underMike Rathbun.
(00:42):
Check us out.
We're even on LinkedIn underMike Rathbun.
Check us out and, in themeantime, sit back, relax, enjoy
and we'll get into the KindnessMatters podcast.
Hey, welcome everybody to theshow.
Thank you so much for taking 30minutes of your time today to
(01:04):
join us.
I have an amazing guest for youtoday.
As a reminder, if you seeanything or hear anything on
this podcast that you findinspiring or motivational or
uplifting, please make sure toshare it with your friends and
family, coworkers, completestrangers on the street, whoever
(01:26):
.
It would mean the world to meto have you share that with them
.
An important note here we wantto inform you that this episode
of the Kindness Matters podcastwill discuss sensitive topics,
including self-harm, mentalhealth issues and possibly
(01:47):
suicide.
These subjects may betriggering for some individuals.
Please, please, please, takecare of your emotional
well-being and consider whetheryou are in a safe space to
listen to this content.
If you find these topicsdistressing, you may wish to
skip this episode or listen witha trusted friend or a mental
health professional.
(02:08):
Your mental health is importantto us.
We encourage you to seeksupport if you need it.
Thank you for yourunderstanding.
My guest today is KelseyShriver, an incredibly talented
artist.
Shriver, an incredibly talentedartist and the owner of
(02:28):
Luminary Tattoo.
She's just opened her owntattoo shop in Lincoln, nebraska
, and welcome to the show,kelsey.
Thanks so much for being here.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Thank you so much for having me, Mike.
It's gosh you're just such ablast to talk to.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Um, so are you?
Thank you, uh, and, and thereason?
Well, first of all, let's talkabout tattoo, because that's a
nice, calming, um, non heavysubject.
Right, because and I say you'rean artist, because tattoo is
(03:08):
artistry, right, you're just,instead of working with paints
and canvases, you're workingwith ink and a different kind of
canvas a body.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Yes, we all go into it with some form of artistic
background.
I was a portrait artist foryears before I started tattooing
, just kind of as like a littleside hustle outside of like
(03:42):
full-time jobs, and then got waymore serious around the time
that I started approaching mymentor for an apprenticeship.
Ah All of us have some sort oflike art background.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Okay, and we all have mentors at some point or
another right.
Speaker 2 (03:59):
In theory.
There are some people that doget into it like self-taught,
just kind of picking things uplike out of their house.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
But a lot of us did go through like a formal
apprenticeship under a mentor.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
Yeah, I'm just saying I don't think I could find a
YouTube video about tattooingand do any kind of good work.
It takes a long time to reallystart to get it down.
I mean, I've been doing iteight years and there are
artists, that I look at theirstuff and I'm like, oh, am I
ever going to hit that level?
Because that is amazing.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Yeah, for sure.
So you started about eightyears ago as an intern.
Is that correct?
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Yes.
Oh sorry, go on.
No, you're fine, Go ahead.
Yeah, I started gettingtattooed by Cody Schneider that
owns Scarlet Raven Tattoo, alsoin Lincoln, nebraska, pretty
close by where I just openedluminary.
Um, I got my first tattoo fromhim when I was 17.
My mom signed off for it andover the course of the next like
(05:15):
six years, um, I just wouldbring my art portfolio to him,
get his advice and his feedback,try to learn from it, and then
eventually, in 2017, I thinkthat was June of 2017, started
pre-apprenticing, which was kindof just going into the shop,
(05:37):
answering phones, cleaning,watching how he would set up for
tattoos, watching him dotattoos, and then we made it
official about a month later.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Nice, I was going to say.
What does an intern tattoo?
What does that look like?
You're basically learningeverything about the shop right
and the art.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Yeah.
So my apprenticeship which Ithink from what I understand
everybody's is a little bitdifferent Mine was, yeah,
helping set up, talking toclients that would come in the
cleaning, taking trash out, allthat kind of stuff, but then
(06:21):
also he gave me like a stack ofreading materials to kind of go
through and for as poorly as Idid in high school, just because
I was one of those kids thatwas like, man, I don't care
about anything that I have tolearn right now if I care.
I am such an overachiever aboutit and I still have my little
(06:42):
composition book where I likehave diagrams of tattoo machines
with notes on like how to takethem apart, put them back
together, all of the bloodbornepathogens, information for like
the testing and study course forthat.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
First aid and still have that and I think I've got
it in the shop right now as aresource for the apprentice that
I have.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
And now you have your own apprentice.
Yes, it's come full circle.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
It has.
That's so fun, but yeah, theneventually kind of got into
tattooing on like practice skinsunder guidance of my mentor and
graduated to real people.
After getting all of my likestate and county licensing
figured out and just kind ofthat.
(07:35):
I knew for a while be likehuman guinea pigs to see how it
went on real skin okay, becauseyou had you said something there
and I immediately froze and Istopped listening.
Practice skins yeah, they'relike this weird rubbery kind of
material and they just come inlike flat pieces.
(07:57):
They also have things called uhthe brand is pound of flesh and
they're like synthetic bodyparts, which that's really
interesting.
I had clear drawers in my roomat Scarlet Raven and just a
forearm wrapped in plastic thatwas for practicing tattooing and
(08:17):
I was like I probably look likea serial killer right now you
know, like do people call youdexter?
thankfully not oh, good, goodlook at it and be like, uh, what
is that why?
Why do you have an arm in aplastic drawer?
Speaker 1 (08:37):
and now I'm just like wondering if, years and years
and years ago, before they hadpractice skins, did they like go
down to the morgue and ask touse a corpse?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
I don't know so you actually uh fruits, a lot of
fruits that have skins, likeoranges, bananas, melons and
things like that.
You can practice on those and Ihave not, but from what I've
heard, it's pretty comparable.
There also are people that havegone to like butchers and asked
for pigskin fair enough, yeahalso similar from what I've
(09:16):
heard.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
Yeah, I yep, that seems more, much more reasonable
yeah we are not going into themorgue.
It might be an option, I don'tknow.
So, and the reason, the reasonI'm talking to you today is
(09:39):
because I saw a post that youhad on on Facebook not Facebook
TikTok, I believe it was yes,and it had a lot to deal with
mental health and,coincidentally, may is mental
health awareness month, so itwas oh, let me see if I can pull
(09:59):
a big word out of my fortuitousthat I should see your, your,
your, tiktok, um, because we'retalking about you.
Do something for people who haveself-harm yes and when we talk
(10:22):
about self-harm, um, I had and Iis, I don't know, is this
fairly recent, I mean likewithin the last 50 years that
people have started doing this?
Speaker 2 (10:38):
I honestly don't know .
Um, I know that it's been likeit's been a thing that people
have used as a maladaptivecoping mechanism.
For longer than I've been aliveI've covered scars for people
that are older than I am.
Like the scars are older than Iam and more obviously faded in
(11:04):
those cases and a little easierto cover up.
But I do feel like specificallyin the last maybe 20 years, it
kind of became a more commonthing.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Yeah, oh yeah, I mean because self-harm comes from
anxiety, depression.
What are some of the Hellokitty?
Speaker 2 (11:35):
Sorry, that's probably Dutch.
He likes to yell.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
So and you said something, you said maladaptive,
and I was looking up the causesof self-harm and one of the
things, one of the definitions Igot was it's a Usually the
result of an inability to copein healthy ways with stress and
emotional pain.
Yeah, Does that ring true foryou?
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Okay, and then there was two actually.
And the other one said having ahard time controlling,
expressing or understandingemotions may lead to self-injury
.
The mix of emotions thattrigger self-injury is complex.
For example, there may befeelings of worthlessness,
lowliness, panic, anger, guilt,rejection, self-hatred, being
(12:39):
bullied or having questionsabout your sexual identity may
all be part of that mix ofemotions.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
And I found it interesting because oftentimes
when people will self-harm andwe'll get into what that looks
like in a second but they'll seethose scars and then that will
make them feel regret or ashamed, which may trigger another
(13:09):
self-harm episode.
Is that right?
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Yeah, and then I mean you walk around out in public
with them visibly on display andoccasionally people will ask
about it or like, specifically,what I've seen a lot of is like
a lot of young kids that justdon't understand that will
acknowledge it.
(13:33):
Um, I had one of my emails.
Actually, there was anindividual that was talking
about having scars acknowledgedby a small kid and being like,
yeah, I want to fight with atiger, um, but you, yeah, having
to like either deflect oracknowledge that publicly as
(13:55):
well, to like strangers orpeople that you know yeah, and
then having to like walk backthrough that is something that
also can be triggering for a lotof people.
Yeah, and then having to likewalk back through that is
something that also can betriggering for a lot of people.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Yeah, so it's like a self-perpetuating kind of thing.
Yeah, and the types ofself-harm I know I think a
fairly common one is cuttingright.
Yes, I think a fairly commonone is cutting right.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
Okay, and what is?
Do you know what that lookslike?
I mean, are you, you'refamiliar with it?
Did you engage in that?
Speaker 2 (14:42):
That was the form that I used when I was younger,
but no other people as well thateither like, did that in
conjunction with orindependently, um would burn or
hit or things like that as wellnow is this something like
hitting a wall when we say hitlike hitting themselves oh I've
(15:05):
encountered a handful of peoplethat, like that was kind of
their form of it, which I feellike leaves a more obvious um
visibility in the moment buttends to have less of the
long-term visibility in the waythat, like cutting or burning
(15:26):
does.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Right, but now a lot of times, not a lot of times.
Sometimes, self-harm can be away of signaling that you are
trying to reach out for help,can it not?
Speaker 2 (15:42):
Oh, it absolutely can .
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Kind of that like silent cry for help, can it not?
Oh, it absolutely can.
Kind of that like silent cryfor help?
Yeah, for sure.
Um, and I, I was wondering why.
You know why?
What?
What does what does the act ofburning yourself or cutting,
what does that is?
(16:08):
Does it bring a relief?
Does it bring a what?
Speaker 2 (16:13):
in the days where that was a coping mechanism that
I was using.
Um, it was a lot of like what Iam feeling emotionally is so
overwhelming and unbearable thatlike this will.
This is a feeling that isn'temotional.
(16:35):
That's going to distract mefrom that.
Um, and yeah, did kind of havelike a little bit of a sense of
relief in just even if it wasfor like a couple minutes not
thinking about what else wasgoing on.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
Right.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
Like almost kind of a and this is maybe a poor
comparison to make, but I hadseen something on I think it was
Facebook a few days ago talkingabout like kind of the
grounding in like gettingtattooed and how it's something
that's like a physical thing,that like brings you back to
(17:20):
your body almost.
Interesting but it's like againthe most in the sense of
self-harm, like the worst waythat you can do that.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Yeah, yeah.
And I saw one again with whypeople do it.
And somebody said to feelsomething, anything, even if
it's physical pain, when they'refeeling emotionally empty.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
Wow, I can't imagine.
I mean I just I struggle withthat, but the feeling I have
never.
I don't think I've ever engagedin self-harm.
I've known people who neveradmitted it to me, but I know
(18:15):
that they did.
Speaker 2 (18:16):
Yeah, I've found that a lot of people don't really
like to talk about it, and it'ssomething that they just kind of
bury down and hope that otherpeople don't bring up, which,
again, having like those visiblescars makes it something that
gets brought up, which is why Idecided to kind of reach out and
(18:41):
offer the scar cover-ups inthat TikTok video.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
Yeah, that is so cool and I wasn't quite ready to go
there yet, but you did, so let'stalk about it.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You're fine Because really youknow what it's like to walk
around literally with thosescars.
Yes, Literally with those scars.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
And the fact that you're offering this service is
kind.
I mean, you charge for it, butit's a lot less than a regular
tattoo would cost.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yes, I am offering them for a $50 flat rate once a
(19:49):
month, typically, sohypothetically, if it's a four
hour tattoo, my in shop rate is150 an hour, so that's like a
$600 tattoo for $50 to make thatmore affordable.
Um, and the 50 is really justkind of covering my supplies and
everything that I'm going touse, although something that I
thought was super awesome andwas not anticipating when I made
that video is the number ofpeople that reached out and
asked if they could donate andpay that $50 cover for it, and I
actually it was a couple daysafter I had uploaded the video
(20:12):
my neighbor Dan, who is just afantastic person, clearly.
Yeah, we had talked in, I thinkMarch, about doing like 40
bucks a month for lawn carestuff at my house and he
approached me a couple daysafter I had uploaded the video,
(20:32):
told me that he watched it andthat he had everything covered
all summer long not to worryabout it and just to take that
and apply it to those scar covertattoos.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
And so like all summer pretty much, those are
just on my neighbor Dan for free.
Thanks, dan, dan is awesome.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
That's so cool and I mean okay, because back to
cutting for a second.
Oh yeah, I apologize.
Typically, the place you dothat is like an arm.
Is that correct?
Because back to cutting for asecond.
Oh yeah, I apologize.
Typically, the place you dothat is like an arm, Is that
correct?
It varies, thighs, I thinkthighs sometimes.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Yeah, I've seen a lot on like the arms and the thighs
, but I've also seen it ontorsos, like really everywhere
calves.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Wow, wow, okay so, and I guess maybe I'm struggling
to figure out how big of anarea we're talking about here,
and obviously it depends on howlong they were cutting right.
Yes, okay about here, andobviously it depends on how long
(21:48):
they were cutting.
Right, yes, okay, so whathelped you?
What helped you to stop cutting?
Speaker 2 (21:53):
honestly, I got into therapy pretty intensely back in
I think that was 2019, if Iremember right.
That helped a lot, but so didjust in my case.
I was like I don't want thathigh visibility.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
And I don't want people to like look at me, see
this and make assumptions basedon what they're seeing.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
Yeah, because they will right.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
I mean, that's how we are right.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Yeah, oh, that person's xyz yeah, it's
something that, like, I feellike leads to a lot of judgment
from others, which then kindkind of perpetuates the cycle of
self-hatred and things likethat.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Then you go back into the shame and the regret.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Yeah, it kind of leads to this vicious vicious
cycle.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
Yeah, for sure.
Now and I mean we've all hadour dealings with the medical
care in this country before.
Yes, and maybe somebody doesn'thave access to mental health
treatment.
What would you say to somebodythat you knew was cutting?
(23:21):
What can you do?
Just on a personal level?
Speaker 2 (23:25):
Yeah, I think on a personal level, really just
letting people know that likeyou're there and you care about
them and like you want goodthings for them, Like they've
got a support system and thatthe world is a better place with
them in it.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
Yes, don't give up.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Yeah, for sure, okay, but you didn't really stop at
cutting cover-ups, becauseyou've also done work with
mastectomy scars.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
Talk about that.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
I go, which I've taken a little bit of a break
from it this year since I'vebeen opening the shop, but I
have worked with Cody Schneiderat Scarlet Raven at Brian West
Hospital um doing 3d effectnipple tattoos for breast cancer
patients that have had to havefull mastectomies and are kind
(24:35):
of at the end of their cancertreatment journey.
It's sort of the last step inlike image recovery.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
So usually everybody is just having a great time on
those days because our patientsare like woohoo, we're done.
This is the last thing.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Yeah, you said.
Did you say soul mastectomies?
Maybe, not, maybe not.
I might have misheard.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
I may have misspoken something and said something
that sounded like that.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
Oh, I thought you said full mastectomy.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
Full.
Yes, that's exactly what it was.
Yeah, and so we're talking bothbreasts.
Yes, Now is this.
This is just for people whohave, who've had, reconstructive
surgery right.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Yes, that is the majority of patients that we see
and work with um and it kind of, from what I understand,
because we just show up intattoo but it's covered by their
insurance and everything.
Um, it is we at the beginning,and I think something in the
(25:52):
insurance industries likechanged in what they would cover
for people undergoing like topsurgeries for gender
reassignment and things likethat as well, where individuals
opted to just have everything,including the nipple removed, or
(26:14):
they would replace it and wewould repigment around it.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Okay, I was going to.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Oh sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you, no no,
keep going.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
I interrupted you.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
I haven't gotten to do as many of those cases at the
hospital anymore, since theinsurance issues have become a
thing, but I've still taken afew of those at the shop as well
had the full mastectomy but notthe reconstruction.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Or, as you mentioned, gender reassignment surgery,
where they've had mastectomy andI mean, if you're going one way
, you don't really want to do areconstruction, but yeah, that's
.
And I was going to ask if youhad done any of that type of
(27:12):
work as well, because it's justthe chest right.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Yes, I haven't gotten to do one of like the full
chest scar covers yet for those.
I have done a lot of scarcovers that are more like kind
of in that vein for like breastreduction implants, other
surgical scars, even some likepeople that have gone through
(27:39):
surgeries for skin cancer andthings like that where they've
got big scars left behind.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Never even thought of that one.
Melanomas, or what have you Wow, or what have you Wow.
And it's just such anopportunity to create something
beautiful.
Where once there was somethingI don't want to say ugly,
because I mean that's part ofwho they were, but you know
(28:05):
where once there was a reminder,and maybe not a very happy
reminder.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Yeah, I feel like the scar cover work in general just
kind of gives people an optionto like rewrite their story and
instead of people looking atthat part of their body and
being like, oh, what happenedthere yeah, you get to be like
oh what a pretty, a prettytattoo yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
Is that the south of France, a unicorn?
Speaker 2 (28:36):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Nice, Nice.
Well, we want to.
Both Kelsey and I would like toremind you that if you are
feeling like harming yourself,or if you're feeling destitute
or like there are no otheroptions, please make sure to
reach out and call 988.
(28:59):
That's the new suicideprevention hotline.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I think yes, and I believe they have a text line.
Oh, it's that same number, if Iremember right.
I have cards at the shop thathave the text line on it as well
, for people that hate talkingon the phone.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
Okay, no, I'm not going to do that.
I'm on the 988 website and Iwanted to look and see if I
could find the text line, textline, and there's a link here
that says text, and I started toclick it and it's like, okay,
(29:48):
what do you need?
Are you feeling helpless?
But, yes, 988 for sure.
If you're feeling in that kindof place, it was so awesome to
talk to you today, kelsey.
I really, really, reallyappreciate your time and what
you're doing for people who needit.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Yes, I appreciate you having me on and trying to help
me spread that reach to people.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
So many people need the services that you're
providing and I mean it's sadthat they need that or that
there are that many people thatneed it, but thankfully there
are people.
If you're in the Lincoln,nebraska area, omaha, grand
Island, worms, nebraska I had tothrow that one in.
(30:33):
You know what it's not that far.
Go see Kelsey and she can getyou hooked up.
I will have links to yourwebsite and all of your social
media on the show notes, and Ihope you have a fantastic week.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
Awesome, thank you so much.
I hope you have a great week.
Awesome, thank you so much.
I hope you have a great weektoo.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
I will Take care, kelsey.
We'll talk again soon.
I want to thank you for takingthis time to listen to this
episode with my guest, kelseySchreiber.
Please make sure to check outthe show notes, where you'll
find additional information onher offer to cover up self-harm
scars.
I hope you're able to takesomething positive from the time
(31:18):
that you spent with us.
Maybe you'll be inspired, maybeyou'll be motivated, maybe
you'll be moved.
If you experienced any of thosepositive feelings, please
consider sharing this podcastwith your friends and family.
I'm always striving to offer youa better podcast, so give me
some feedback, let me know howyou think I'm doing.
Email me, leave me a message onthe socials.
(31:41):
It would mean the world.
We'd also be honored if youwould follow us on our social
media accounts like Facebook,instagram, linkedin and TikTok.
This podcast is part of theMayday Media Network.
If you have an idea for apodcast and need some production
assistance, or have a podcastalready and are looking for a
(32:03):
supportive network to join,check out maydaymedianetworkcom
and check out the many differentshows, like Afrocentric.
Back again next week with abrand new episode and we would
(32:28):
be honored if you would join us.
You've been listening to theKindness Matters Podcast.
I'm your host, mike Rathbun.
Have a fantastic week.
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