July 31, 2025 • 50 mins
“You're the only person that spends the entire day with you—own it.”
Christopher McFadden brings the heat in this candid conversation about what it really takes to lead yourself, your team, and your business with intention.
From emotional intelligence and burnout recovery to feedback culture and Gen Z expectations, this episode pulls back the curtain on what leadership actually looks like in hospitality today.
🔍 What We Cover:
- The shift from hitting metrics to owning the moment
- Self-awareness vs. self-management—and why both matter
- How Gen Z gives more feedback than you think (and how to use it)
- Rebuilding team trust after burnout
- Leadership lessons from the floor, the classroom, and the stage
🎙 Guest: Christopher McFadden
Founder, The McFadden Group
🌐 https://tmg-hospitality.ca
🔗 Christopher on LinkedIn
🎧 Host: Jason E. Brooks
Leadership Coach | Keynote Speaker | Hospitality Strategist
🌐 https://www.jasonebrooks.com/podcast
📌 The Leadership Table is a podcast for hospitality operators, executives, and emerging leaders who believe growth begins with the way we lead.
🔔 Subscribe and leave a review to help more leaders find this show.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Welcome to the Leadership Table, where
conversations inspire, lead andelevate.
I'm your host, jason E Brooks,bringing you insights from top
leaders who are reshapingindustries through purpose,
leadership and culture, andtoday I'm joined by Christopher
McFadden, a restaurantoperations veteran turned
(00:26):
hospitality consultant andspeaker.
As the founder of the McFaddenGroup, christopher works with
leaders and teams to buildcultures rooted in empathy,
ownership and personal growth.
His message is clear In today'shospitality landscape,
leadership isn't about hittingmetrics.
It's about owning the moment,the mindset and the impact you
(00:50):
have on others.
But before we dive in, don'tforget to subscribe and share
this episode with someonebuilding culture in our industry
Now.
Christopher, thank you so much.
We met in person for the veryfirst time at Bar and Restaurant
Expo in Las Vegas.
(01:12):
I think that we talked viaonline a few times, but thank
you for joining me on the show.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
What an amazing invitation to have, jason.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, bar and Restaurant Expointroduction.
It was a neat moment for bothof us because we knew each other
and then got to know each other, which was great.
So, yeah, this is an amazingopportunity, so thank you again
for it.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Well, thank you for coming to the table Now.
You've walked the walk from VPof operations to building your
own consulting group.
What inspired you to start theMcFadden group and what have you
learned about leadership sincemaking that leap?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
You know, I think a big, a big thing for me was 25
years in restaurants.
I love this industry, I lovethis business, I love the nature
of taking care of people, andCOVID was a tricky moment for
all of us, but I think a bigthing that really shifted as I
was still in the business and wewere now reopening our doors,
(02:20):
if you will, with half capacityand just actually a little bit
less for what we could fit.
And it was this moment of youknow if we're going to do this
again, how are we going to do it.
We've seen what the corporatemodel looks like for COVID and
again, none of us knew what todo and we went up a little bit
more with some more steam on it.
But our number one thing I wasa partner and general manager
(02:42):
and director of the designrestaurants just outside
Vancouver and the tone weshifted with was let's put the
guests after our staff, becauseif we don't have our staff
walking in the door feeling safeand sound, then it doesn't make
any sense for pushing moreguests in the door that are
compromising the health andsafety of our team and that if
somebody walks in the door as astaff member, there should never
(03:04):
be a worry of anything, thatthey should feel like we're just
going to get greedy with howmany covers we're putting in the
book and how much money we'reputting in the bank, but rather,
if we do this in a differentway, we can't have guests unless
we have our staff.
Unless our staff are happy,we're not going to be pushing
our finances up in the marketshare that we need it to be.
We're not going to be pushingour finances up in the market
(03:26):
share that we need it to be, andvery successfully.
In September of that year 2020,we ended up doing 1,000 more
covers and 100,000 more inrevenue.
We didn't have a single COVIDcase and this was with 64 seats
instead of 143 seats in ouroriginal budget and we were a
powerhouse and I was superblessed.
As the BC Restaurant Foundationhad said.
The president said you were theexample that everybody should
(03:47):
have followed and I was likeholy cow, like the genuineness
to that.
But as that was all happening,I forgot that I should have
probably taken care of myselffirst and that I could always
put the light on and the sparkon, but inside, inside, it
wasn't good for really what Iknew and how I looked outside
(04:10):
and at the end of December 2021,I knew I had to step away.
I just wasn't in a healthyspace anymore.
I quit drinking about eightyears ago.
I got tagged as the sober song.
I started tasting wine again,thinking I had control over it,
and I didn't.
I went into a lost spiral andmy biggest thing was that if I'm
not leading myself intomaintaining a healthy and
(04:33):
confident and very structuredand organized life, then it
doesn't make any sense for me toreally be continuing to lead
people for this moment that I'min, and that I knew that I had
to back up for myself.
And end of December 2021, I leftmy partnership and that's when
I connected with my dear friend,edwin Kumar.
So it's been three years thatwe had launched Restaurant
(04:53):
Leadership 101.
And the two of us sat down andrealized that nobody talked
about emotional intelligence andsoft skill development in
restaurant leaders.
So we built a program and itwas interesting, because AI
wasn't really a thing I was evenaware of back then.
So it was a 10 month study onemotional intelligence and
building a program based uponthe foundations of what was out
(05:13):
there.
And then I went after gettingmy coaching certifications in
emotional intelligence withmaster class certifications as
well.
And then I got hospitality,leadership certification and
addiction recovery actually,because now I've been eight
years without a drop of hardalcohol and beer and almost
three years without a sip ofwine.
So, my pivot.
Everything in me had to comefirst in order for me to be the
(05:33):
best I could be for my teams.
And I did and I worked my tailoff at it.
But I realized how much moreinwardness I had to do to expose
myself on the outside.
So, yeah, the pivot happenedand the McFadden group
originally had launched throughwhat I was doing a restaurant
leadership, one-on-one withEdwin, but doing more one-to-one
(05:53):
coaching with leaders acrossrestaurants, still just more
one-to-one.
You know more of the hour longsessions or you know a few
different single sessions.
And then it was last summer thatI said I've been a professor
for the last couple of years inour college system up here in
Ontario.
I was watching a lot ofstudents have this gap between
(06:17):
international students,specifically domestic students
as well, but this gap betweeneducation and career and how do
I fill that centerpiece to it?
Well, but this gap betweeneducation and career and how do
I fill that centerpiece to it?
And I started helping themthrough career changes that they
were looking at or careerdirection that they were looking
at.
But I was doing it as a fullexploration of their core values
and developing their Russianintelligence to get them there.
(06:37):
And Edwin goes to me, he goes,you realize you're doing career
coaching, and I said, well, no,bless you sir.
I said no, I guess not, and Isaid my.
My attribute is what ifleadership we can look at as an
actionable state rather thanjust a positional state?
And if we're and I and I loveworking with management teams?
But what about everybody else?
What about the ones that wantto start growing in this
(06:59):
business?
What about the hostess that'sjust having a tough day and that
that has to be there?
But rather, what if she wantedto be there?
And creating that environmentwhere, if you can find more of
yourself to be a better versionof yourself for yourself first,
is it automatically translatesinto the people that are around
you and the guests that are withyou.
(07:21):
I think teams sing when you cansee them happy and I think it
changes the guest aspect ofthings.
So my entire position was let'sdo career coaching from here to
here and help people on thosesteps, on how to get there.
So, whether or not it's careertransition, whether or not it's
looking for the leveling up inthe business, whether it's
maintaining the same role thatthey're doing I've got waiters
that have worked for me for 50years because they never wanted
(07:44):
to manage but they were theleaders of the bunch.
So I think everybody in thespace needs to have an
opportunity to show what kind ofleadership that they can do
actionably.
So the McFadden group now hasbeen about a year focused on
career coaching with aleadership as an action kind of
tone to it my mic was actuallyoff, so it was off and I wasn't
(08:44):
sure if I was.
I'm not sure if it was a thingto say or not, because I was
like maybe we can cut that part.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
I'll bring it back Now.
There is definitely quite a bitfor our listeners to unpack in
that, and every single piece ofthat was all golden nuggets.
Now, even going back to theCOVID times, whenever you were
viewed as that shining examplefrom your brand owner of what
(09:14):
you can do within your locationsto not only overcome the
challenges by putting the teamfirst in order to be more
effective with your customers,to to have better culture with
your customers, but to alsoincrease covers by over a
(09:35):
thousand covers during that timeframe for the year through
COVID into September.
Now, a lot of that, though,does cause burnout.
A lot of that does cause stress, and you took from that
different ways of how to view.
(09:56):
What am I doing?
What is my personal life goingthrough?
How is that connected with whatI'm doing at work?
And now, how can I take what Ijust went through and teach
others, have them skip thatburnout phase that a lot of
people within our industry goesthrough?
(10:16):
You speak openly about mentalhealth and burnout, which a lot
of leaders avoid.
Why is this a crucialconversation in hospitality
right now?
Speaker 2 (10:31):
I think my biggest shift was not so much of the
what but the why, why, why,what's our why and our what?
What is it that makes us dowhat we do, but why?
What's our why and our what?
What is it that makes us dowhat we do, but why?
Why does it make us do that?
And I think I I just I'm anadvocate for transparency and I
(10:52):
think transparency is the onething that really empowers
individuals on your team.
It empowers teams is that itshifts the tone.
When you're fully trusting of anindividual that works with you
Um, I don't like saying for you,but with you and I think when
you build that trust, it allowsthat empowerment.
But you have to trust yourselfand knowing what you're doing is
(11:15):
in the best light of yourself.
Because if you're at the top ofthe pedestal, even if you're at
the starting point of yourleadership, positionally, as a
role in management roles Gosh,you really got to be good at
what you do, based upon what youlove to do, because you
understand exactly why you wantto do it.
And this isn't about puttingyou in a spotlight to say, well,
(11:37):
you know, I'm the manager ofthis room.
This is well.
No, it's the action of whatwe're doing, and I think the
mental health conversation is sopowerful in our entire culture
today, but it's the littlethings that we do with it.
It's the simple thing.
When a staff member walks inthe door and it was how are you?
I would say to my team ifyou're not having a good day,
(11:58):
send me a note.
I don't need to know why, justif today's not your day, take it
.
We can figure out the section.
I have to take a section for anight.
I'll take a section for a night, but the best thing that can be
done is where you're at inwanting to come here because you
feel like you're in a goodplace.
(12:19):
I was having a conversation witha client yesterday and I said
how are you with your emotionswhen it comes to heading into
work?
And it was.
It was interesting because shesaid um, well, I'm really good
at, you know, not having outsideinfluences affect me, you know,
when I come into the workplace.
And I said what's funny is thatI used to catch people off
(12:41):
guard in interviews where firstI would catch them off guard by
flipping their resume over andpushing it to the side and
they'd go oh, do you not want totalk about my resume Like
that's what got you here.
I know you can do the job.
What'd you have for breakfastthis morning?
Do you have any pets?
What do your parents do for aliving?
What was your schooling like?
How did you like going to thiscollege?
And and they were like I didn'texpect an interview to be like
(13:08):
this.
I said the first thing, that'sthe most important part to this
is are we right for you?
And she goes, but shouldn't mebe right for you?
And I said we'll get there Ifthis doesn't seem like the right
fit for you.
No grudges, no like.
I understand that this is how Ilike to do things.
Is that let's just have aconversation.
Taking care of people is thestarting point of having and
building relationships.
Selling is relationships.
It's easy to sell when you'renot selling.
(13:30):
It's easy to sell when you'vecreated a trustworthiness with
your guests and with you, withyour team, to feel fully
protected and taken care of.
And then I said at the end ofthe interview and that sales
pitch that every and I'm surewe've, I know I've done it and
you've probably done it too isthat that last sentiment of
trying to get the job is just tolet you know I don't bring my
(13:51):
outside problems in and Ireplied back and I said, sure
you do.
And they went what?
And I was like of course you do, you're a human being, there's
absolutely everything rightabout that.
But the difference is how youare able to manage those to be
able to provide the service thatwe'd like to for our guests,
(14:12):
and you know the level that we'dlike to be at.
But if I don't recognize thatwhen you walk in the door and
just expect you to do the grind,then I haven't done my job as
the leader at the top of thetier with my team by recognizing
what's going on with my teamand that if I'm not aware of
that and paying attention to it,then I've completely deflated
(14:34):
what the purpose of what we'redoing in hospitality is.
Hospitality is the gesture oftaking care of somebody.
I watched something the otherday where it was a documentary
and somebody said thanks foryour hospitality and it was
great because I was watching andthis was a new message that I
put on LinkedIn was thathospitality is a thing that we
provide.
Service is a thing that we do.
Hospitality isn't just food andbeverage, it's not just hotels.
(15:00):
It's not just accommodations,it's not just tourism, it's the
act of looking after people.
It's not just accommodations,it's not just tourism, it's the
act of looking after people.
So if we do better at that butif myself as the director of the
restaurant, as a partner of therestaurant or a junior manager,
senior manager, it doesn'treally matter or the lead server
on the team, it's all about howwe salute our team members,
knowing that they're taken careof when they walk in the door
(15:20):
and that we have interest inthem, and I think that changes
the complete tone and that'swhat allowed for the success
with BC Restaurant Foundation'spresident to say you're setting
the tone, you know you've donevery well through this, like
great.
We were also very lucky too.
We had a vaccination centerthat was attached to us that a
dear friend of ours had set up.
So if there was any sparevaccines at the end of the day
(15:41):
we got offered them.
So my restaurant team inBritish Columbia restaurants got
put beside first responders.
So it went first responders toget vaccines and then restaurant
and my team was the first fullyvaccinated staff in all of
British Columbia and it wasfunny enough because I was
quality checking tables andactually offering vaccines to
(16:01):
guests.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Were you administering them yourself or
were you just sitting next?
Speaker 2 (16:08):
door.
I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'mkidding.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
You're going to take this right, yeah.
Take this shot and take thisshot.
Take this shot, no.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
It's a whole difference of just, you know, we
did it, we just, and it's notthat it was just there, it's now
.
What I'm doing as a coach isand a consultant is helping
teams see past just the roleit's positions is incredibly
important, but if your peoplearen't built properly for it,
we're satisfied or happy right.
There's always a struggle inwhat we're doing in service
(16:42):
because the industry still isgrowing back, if you will, and
especially in different parts ofour continent and where we see
it more actively with you knowbeing, you know, border partners
here and understanding what weboth do in our industry to help.
But you know, I think it startswith transparency and the more
honest we are with what'shappening in front of us and
that thing that's just in frontof us instead of down the road,
(17:06):
allows the down the road easierto get to.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
So tell us.
You know there are a lot oflisteners from the US, quite a
few from Canada and across thepond as well.
But how is?
How is the environment rightnow in British Columbia, when it
(17:28):
comes down to the team, when itcomes you seeing in your area,
when it comes down to bridgingthat generational gap within
Canada?
Speaker 2 (18:00):
You know, what's interesting is that I and it's
great because I bounce back andforth to BC quite a bit because
I do have clients there but mywife and I had moved to Southern
Ontario where I grew up becauseand I said this on video the
other day was sometimes you haveto reprioritize your priorities
, and it was about me being here, because of a lot of family
illness that came upon my family, that I needed to be here for.
My wife worked excessively toPrince Edward Island and it's
(18:21):
interesting especially bringingup the British Columbia point is
being removed from it as acitizen, but still being
involved with it as a consultant.
It's neat to now see it outsideof the province because it
doesn't become as personalanymore, so you have an
(18:41):
opportunity to view it with asecond set of eyes, because I
know Vancouver so well I livedthere for 13 years and I know
the feeling of the city.
It's a very relaxed city andwhen you see a relaxed city
start to build emotions upbecause of the shifts that are
happening and you see moreanxiety, more stress, more
(19:04):
burnout.
Drinking is still a problem inrestaurants, right, whether or
not we want to talk about it asheavily as we used to talk about
it.
So, seeing it, I think nowthere's more of a whether or not
we want to talk about it asheavily as we used to talk about
it.
So, seeing it, I think nowthere's more of a.
The hardest part was people justtrying to convince themselves
to stay in the business basedupon the fact that technology
has become super heavy.
(19:24):
Ai has become incredibly heavy.
We've been able to have theseadvancements in how fast we can
make things operate, but we'restill in the people component of
the industry.
We're still this person toperson and that's still a
requirement of what we do, and Ithink people feel safer today
because of the shifts that arehappening.
But more so is that we're stillgrowing and learning, because
(19:45):
if something happened againtomorrow in our world, are we
prepared for going in and stickhandling it again, or do we
remember exactly what we did,going in and stick handling it
again, right, or do we rememberexactly what we did?
Um, and now seeing in ontariowhen I moved back to here in
2022 was now seeing downtowntoronto, which is much bigger
than vancouver, and seeing whatcovid repair looked like in now,
(20:08):
a city that's got three timesthe amount of citizens, and
trying to pay attention to that,as I understood how it was
there at the time, and I thinkour growth is coming along and I
think there's moreopportunities for people to
trust how businesses and howmanagement teams and how
directorship teams and ownershipteams are taking care of their
teams directly.
(20:30):
Is that there's more of aninspiration for people to
realize how important the peopleare that work with you and not
just the customers that arewalking in the door, and I think
that's been a huge strive inhow we're growing in our
industry again.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Do you think that our industry right now is probably
the most battlefield tested whenit comes to emotional
intelligence and to things thatare going on within the economy?
Does it because I know.
(21:06):
When this first happened,everyone, every study, viewed
the effects of COVID ontoeveryone from age 10 up to age
20, even 30.
And during that first threeyears of what that did not only
(21:28):
to people in school but to work,to people in school but to work
, especially the hospitalityindustry Do you feel that they
are the most battle ready forthe next big thing to happen, or
does that emotionalintelligence now?
Has it been fractured some?
(21:48):
Has the culture been fractured,and can they withstand
something else similar to thatif it were to happen again
sometime soon?
Speaker 2 (22:00):
I question, I think I think I mean the first part of
emotional intelligence isself-awareness and getting to
know yourself more.
It's when you get to the secondpart of managing that that it's
a.
It's a, it's a process.
It took three years of studyfor me to understand who I am
(22:21):
today, because of knowing what,what wall I hit.
And then the speed bumps thatshowed up even in those early
times.
And then me hitting a wall, andnow, when speed bumps show up,
the wall doesn't show up anymore, because I know exactly how to
walk myself to the fork in theroad If I head down the wrong
(22:42):
way and I'm like, ah, I know howto back myself up and do it the
right way.
Now it takes work.
It's not that I'm perfectly puttogether, but the emotionalness
of really becoming aware ofyour why and to create your what
.
But once you get theself-awareness part and I think
(23:03):
we're pretty confidently gettingthere with people is the
managing part of it is where Isee it happen with clients,
where that's where the break isstarting.
But they're very empathetic andthey're super motivated and
energized and they love beingout and about within the social
skills department.
But I was like but why?
(23:24):
What happened.
You missed the management partof it.
You've got all this and thisfigured out and it's that I'm
stuck in understanding exactlywhere I'm going with things.
I'm fully aware of what's goinginto our industry and the
emotions that are behind it andhow I have to drive myself for
it, but I'm having a problemmanaging it, and I think that's
where the emotional intelligencehas.
(23:46):
The most tricky part for peopleis now that you've discovered
all these things about yourselfand sometimes things that you go
wow, this is oh okay.
Like I go through 60 differentcore values in four different
places, you know, in a workspace, if you will.
And it's amazing when we'regoing through them is that all
(24:09):
of a sudden, everyone's stillout.
You get somebody who goes huh,I don't know.
And I had a client yesterdaythat public service was not very
important to them and I waslike what?
And as soon as they said it, Isaid why?
Because every other core valuethat you had a moment ago that
was important and very importantis the basis point for why you
do public service.
Where's that gap?
(24:30):
What's happening?
Why don't you think that that'simportant?
And funny enough, as we workthrough, the entire thing went
back to the personal SWOTanalysis to measure their
strengths, weaknesses,opportunities and threats.
They didn't have anyopportunities put in there.
Now their opportunities startedshowing up in the conversation
and then we went back toquestions that I had had for
them in their first session twoweeks before, and there was
three questions that they didn'tanswer and this this time
(24:53):
around, they answered them, butanswered them with confidence,
certainty, fully understandingwhere they had gotten themselves
to and held on to understandingthat.
That it allowed the entireconversation just to bloom and
by the end of it it was oh, andI said, manage that you got to
hold it.
This is you.
(25:19):
You're the only person thatspends an entire day with
yourself, so own it and whenyou're having a tricky part of
the day, figure out how you'regoing to best manage that for
yourself.
Everything else becomes simpler, not easy.
Simpler Because you're startingto understand it in a different
way, because you understandyourself more.
So I think the emotionalintelligence spectrum and
(25:40):
conversation is super importantand I think more people are apt
to understanding it now becausepeople have to come first and
when we reprioritize that, thefirst people to the table needs
to be yourself, and then yourteam, and then your guests.
You'll have more guests, you'llhave more staff and you'll have
a better presence as the leaderin the room.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
It sounds like that conversation was one of those
really breaking down the wallnot even breaking down the wall,
because breaking down the wallis a very harsh treatment that
takes a hammer or explosives butit it does sound like there was
a little bit of chiseling andthen removing of bricks and
(26:23):
getting down to the barefoundation and then building
that back up the way that theyunderstood why each brick was
laid the way that it is.
And, speaking of laying bricks,it does take a lot for the
growth aspect for that to happen.
(26:43):
I know we just spoke throughhow do we think that the teams
these days, how they dopost-COVID, going through that,
from teenagers to young adults,even to middle-aged adults as
well.
But there still has to be,there has to be a growth period.
(27:07):
Even if we think we've stoppedor we've paused or we're going
through challenges, that causesus not to growth, there is still
growth that is going on as aperson.
So what are your thoughts onhow people grow from here
(27:28):
internally, not just with theirbusiness, not just to make their
business more healthy?
How do they grow themselves?
Speaker 2 (27:39):
One thing that I and I'm going to relate this
actually to working with youngerteams was when I was a kid.
I loved it when we were hostingdinner with family over and my
parents were like we're going toopen the dining room and I was
like great, and we had theseblack and white show plates and
napkin rings to make yournapkins look fancy on a table.
And I used to obsessively loveto set the dining room table at
(28:01):
10 years old and I never paidattention to that.
Being so vivid in why theintention of making something
perfect in a visual componentwas why I drove restaurants the
way I did.
But I also came fromrestaurants where you line
tables up with a string.
Every glass and piece ofcutlery couldn't be a quarter of
an inch off.
(28:22):
But now getting to see theyounger generations coming into
the business, a lot moreopenness and voices, a lot more
being heard or hoping to beheard, it's that old guard
leadership and young guard thatthey're coming in and that it's
about bringing bringing your son45 yesterday and it's about
(28:43):
bringing myself down to ayounger generation.
Understand how they're thinkingcompared to how I was just yes,
boss, sure, that's what theboss says, that's what you do.
So I started paying attentionto the visual component that
everybody's on their phones.
People are so visually heavynow and I thought what if I was
to start showing them examplesof how table settings needed to
be based upon setting oneflawlessly and one just a little
(29:06):
off, and then presenting thesame dishes of food to them,
serve to them perfectly on oneperfect table and just a little
off on the other one, just tosee how an 18-year-old was going
to understand why that was soimportant.
And when I started payingattention to that, I started
realizing how much more visual Ithink the world has become and
(29:27):
what it's trying to see andhopefully have.
I think the connection point iseverything right.
If you've got a yesterday and atoday, well, it's those two
things that are going to helpyour tomorrow.
And the visual component hasbeen a big thing that I learned
that younger generations neededto have in order to succeed, and
(29:48):
that alone inspired me to nowdoing things in different ways
of how I manage myself through aday, how I make notes around my
house on little post-it notes,right, just to do little
reminders for myself.
It's the visual component thatI had learned that the younger
generation was doing really wellin their development.
I thought you know what?
Maybe I can continue my owndevelopment by shifting a little
(30:09):
bit of my daily, my dailiness,in order to continue my own
growth.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
I'll tell you what.
They've not only mastered thevisual aspect, because they're
always looking at the finerdetails when it comes down to
short form content and long formcontent, but another thing that
they've done well is that theyhave really grown to giving
(30:38):
automatic feedback.
Yes, it's digital, and theystill have growth to do when it
comes down to person to personfeedback being given.
But if you think about, I justdid a keynote in Dayton, ohio
yesterday, and one of the thingsthat we talked about was how we
(31:02):
look at Gen Z and how Gen Z isso accustomed to telling people
how they feel, or ranking howinexperienced was automatically.
If you think about Facebook alike, a love, a support think
about LinkedIn.
(31:22):
If you think about Twitter, x,instagram it doesn't matter
TikTok, everything, music,netflix, you name it If you
think about how much feedbackthey give, they give more
feedback in this generationright now, all the way down to
(31:45):
alpha and beta.
They give so much more feedbackthan any other generation has
given, except they do itdigitally.
And then we talked about now wethen bring in these people,
these amazing people, into ourbusinesses, and how much
opportunity do you give them togive you feedback about the
(32:08):
business, about the shift, aboutwhat works well, about what
does not, and everyone got quietlike, wow, I actually don't.
And I said, think about this.
Think about if we gave them thespace and the opportunity to
give feedback.
Not feedback that changes yourwhole brand, all the blood,
(32:30):
sweat and tears that you putinto how you do business, but
just feedback on what's goingwell.
Do you realize how much moregrowth, how much more
opportunity and insight that wecan have and then how much more
we will connect with them forthem to truly be a part of our
business?
So I definitely feel everythingyou slung right there.
(32:55):
So a few more questions, a fewmore questions.
Now you've been sharing.
Speaker 2 (33:00):
If I may say, I love what you said and it's I used to
have.
Um, I created a front of housemanual that was just every role
that was in front of house, theresponsibilities,
responsibilities.
What an open to a closetheoretically looked like in
that position.
And it was funny because forservers, I had put their yes as
(33:21):
your role, but not limited to,so that they understood that you
still had to answer the guestsand you know, no, no, I'm a
server, I don't do that.
We got rid of that.
But the difference was when I,when we, when we bring somebody
onto our team, we know what therole is that we're looking for
to be filled.
However, I had a 17-year-oldgirl best interview ever when
(33:47):
she walked in the door just shyof turning 16.
And by 17, I made her my leadhostess.
And she goes, oh, and I saidrun the door, you know what we
do, but now let's keep growingit.
And she was you're the one thatruns the restaurant.
I said but I'm not running thedoor.
Hey, expo, right, expo was ourfront of house position.
(34:09):
And I said what do we need todo to grow this through, now
that we're doing takeout anddelivery?
And now guests are back in therestaurant.
How are we going to make thisstronger so that the flow
doesn't get interrupted?
And it was like, well, butyou're the GM.
And I was like, but you're theexpo.
I know what we should be doing,but if I just bring you things
(34:32):
versus you having theopportunity to bring me things,
the idea of growth doesn't existanymore, because now you're
just listening to autocraticness, which I believe needs to exist
, based upon me runningfinancials.
You don't need to know that.
However, when it comes to theservant side of the leadership
the difference in havingsomebody go, you know what?
I bet you we could save a bitof time and provide a better
(34:55):
guest experience and an easierteam atmosphere if we were to do
it this way.
Great, let's give it a shot.
And I think opening that doorfor your team to have the
opportunity to think on theirown with what they're doing
allows for the growth aspect ofthings to scale quite quickly,
because it can't just be ledfrom the top down right, bottom,
bottom up is a great way to atleast open up that door of
(35:17):
conversation to go how do youfeel about this?
And it catches them off guard.
They're like, uh, I didn'texpect to get asked that.
Well, you've been working herefor a while, or you just joined
here after six months.
How do you feel?
Like?
What are we doing?
Right, but the shift of makingpeople think out their positions
so that they can grow.
It's great, especially with theyounger generation wanting to
(35:39):
have that feedback andconversation.
And hey, can you just hear meout for a minute?
Sure, not a problem, right?
Is that it changes everythingand it just makes a smoother
service, because you have onegoal at the end of the day, and
that's taking care of yourguests.
That's what we're doing as abusiness.
But when the team knows thatthey're taking care of each
other, the guest relationshipsbloom.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
It shifts the whole human connection in every
direction, Absolutely.
Now you've been sharing yourmessage more from stages across
the industry.
What has that experience taughtyou about leadership, how to
(36:21):
communicate, and even yourself?
Speaker 2 (36:26):
leadership, how to communicate and even yourself.
We've become so digital thatZoom and the world of Teams has
allowed for us to grow.
But the moment of shakingsomebody's hand and saying hello
(36:49):
in person is everything to me.
I love my extrovertedness.
My wife is super introverted.
We were at church when we firstmoved back to Burlington and
the pastor's, like you know,shake somebody's hand and Joe's
like, do it, go for a walk?
And I was like, yes, right, andall of a sudden I'm touring the
church to say, hey, chrisMcFadden, the back of the city,
(37:11):
kind of a moment.
I really want us just tounderstand how important people
are to what we do.
But very much so as just ahuman being, is that I like to
go out and enjoy evenings out.
I like to go out for lunch.
I like to go out like we all do, right.
But being on the servicecomponent of it, in the actual
industry of it, and now helpinglarger amounts of teams and now
having this message to anaudience that I've never met
(37:33):
before, it's the same, it's thesame conversation, it's just
perspective of how it's ingested.
And that moment of somebody tocome up to me after the show's
done or the conversation's doneto say hey, that really hit a
mark for me, like thanks formentioning that.
I just appreciate that and Ithink the more we open up
(38:05):
conversation you know and veryblessed that we can still do
this very heavily through all ofthe technology channels but
when you see a room filled andyou see an expo filled and a
convention filled with peoplethat are all getting back into
the, isn't it nice to be back inthe people side of what we're
doing.
It's brilliant.
And the guest speaking spots forme is it gives me an
opportunity to meet a bunch ofpeople I've never met before and
maybe not shake their hands butat least to look them in the
(38:27):
face.
And I'm one of those peoplethat I kind of I grabbed at
Gordon Ramsay.
You know, nice to see you.
Every time in KitchenNightmares when he walks into a
room and I started doing thatall the time and people go have
we met?
I'm like no, but we've juststarted the conversation.
And they go, oh, oh, okay.
I'm like, hey, nice to see you.
(38:47):
They're like we've never metbefore.
I'm like I know, but now right,and I would do that in the
restaurant, now that I'm doingthat when I'm at conventions and
expos to say, hey, nice to seeyou.
People are like what Doesn'tmatter, right, is that it shifts
your mindset for a second,because all I did was make you
think have we met before youlook familiar?
(39:07):
No, right, but I just wanted tokind of catch you off guard
with a different introduction.
Speaker 1 (39:11):
That shapes the energy for that conversation to
move forward in ways that peoplecannot imagine.
I love that and I'm going tohave to use that as well,
Absolutely so.
Now I have two questions that Iask every single guest at the
leadership table.
(39:32):
Now, if you could sit at aleadership table with three
others, alive or from history,who would you choose and why?
Speaker 2 (39:48):
You know, what's interesting is I was thinking
about this as I began my daytoday and I think I taught
restaurant leadership atCentennial College a couple, a
few semesters ago and that was aquestion for our students was
you know who is who's yourleader that you would want to
sit at a table with?
And you know, for me, I love, Ilove watching the.
(40:09):
You know, the hierarchy ofthese celebrities that exist in
the world are those verypowerful people that made these,
made these fantasticdiscoveries and decisions and
growth aspects for all of us tobe able to get where we are
today, and decisions and growthaspects for all of us to be able
to get where we are today.
But I think a big differencefor me is we've gone through a
(40:30):
big shift of what's happened inour education system up here in
Canada.
Professor jobs, academic roles,admin roles are all being lost
within our country because ofour international student shift
and I'm going to actually put myprogram directors and deans on
my list of leadership teams thatI would actually like to sit
down and be at that table tounderstand what they actually
(40:53):
went through when thisannouncement got made.
I know what it felt like as aprofessor, but the associate
dean, the deans, the programcoordinators, the program
directors.
If I could sit down with my teamfrom Fanshawe, toronto and
Centennial College, all in thesame room, to say what did this
(41:14):
shift look like as the top ofthe food chain in these schools,
to be able to hopefully keepthe hospitality and tourism
programs alive, how pivots weregoing to happen.
To hopefully keep thehospitality and tourism programs
alive, how pivots were going tohappen.
So my shout-outs go out to mywheelhouse of Damien Holborn,
michelle Kane, kristen Straneyfrom Centennial College and Nora
(41:37):
Kuder and our Dean, tanya fromFanshawe, toronto.
Those would be the five leadersthat I would like to sit in a
room with and hear them walkthrough what they had to go
through that allowed for theschools of hospitality to
continue what they're doing forthe betterness of our businesses
(41:58):
and our industries and oureducation out there.
So, yeah, it's the people thatinspired me to give and gave me
the opportunity to become aprofessor in hospitality schools
.
Those are the five that I wouldlove to sit down and say what
did this feel like going throughin the level of your roles
(42:23):
within these educationalinstitutes?
So those are my leaders.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
That's incredible, and your why is very impactful,
because it's not just about youwanting to be there at the table
for your own gain, it's for allof the professors, all of those
that want to learn or that wantto teach.
So that's a very powerfulanswer to that question.
(42:50):
I do have one more question aswell.
You know, we we we have lots ofconversations that shape, shift
and move us.
Some of those conversations arenegative ones that even we
still learn from, about how wewant to be like or not want to
be like, and then we have thosethat the words are just put in
(43:13):
place in just the right way,that it also helps to reshape
how we think about leadership.
So what's one conversation Iknow you've had many, but what's
one conversation that reshapedhow you show up as a leader?
Speaker 2 (43:35):
I love when conversations show up and you
take them.
It's the ingesting ingestingwhat is being said instead of
looking, instead of the hamsterin your mind, just running and
going oh, I got an answer.
For that is, it's the pause.
And, um, it was interesting.
And I I had this conversationwith somebody yesterday um,
(43:57):
edwin and I, when we had createdrestaurant leadership 101, we
had done a whole section on onthe fight freeze, um, fear and
fawn moment, and one day, I meanwe had been teaching it and I
think I had always lived in fear, in in just moments and always
worst case scenario.
I was one of those people thattried to write the last chapter
(44:19):
before I started the firstchapter and it was always like,
wow, this is probably going tohappen, right, and um, when I
had quit drinking, I startedbecoming quite confident in
conversations with people andmaybe a little over, a little
overzealous on the questionsthat I was asking, and I had
said out loud one day to my wifejoanne, I said I've realized
(44:43):
and learned something recentlywas that always ask a question?
And she goes what?
And I said I realized that youshould always ask a question.
Don't sit on something.
I said it'll make me strongerat what I'm doing and how I'm
growing in the changes that I'mseeing in my own life, the
mistakes that I had made, goingback to tasting wine and it
(45:03):
becoming irresponsible of me,the mistakes that I had made
going back to tasting wine andit becoming irresponsible of me.
But my one thing that I hadsaid was always ask a question
because there's a 50, 50 shot.
You're going to get the answerthat you want and if you don't
get the answer that you want,that means you still have 50% of
a chance to reframe it and askit a different way after you
think it out, to potentially getthe answer that you wanted.
(45:25):
And my wife throws this in myface every once in a while.
She's, like you know, a wise manonce told me when we were, when
I started seeing that more, um,just more in my years of the
last few years since I reallybrought that up, um more so in
conversations with people, therewas a day that edwin I was
(45:45):
doing a coaching.
I was sitting in one of edwin'sexecutive coaching things just
to watch how he was doing hiscoaching and it was a great
invitation that he had sent mein and we he brought up in this
coaching session with theseexecutives and not restaurant.
Uh, about the fear and fightmodel, and um, and I, I wrote so
he says how are you doing withthe whole amygdala hijack?
(46:06):
And this is where I actuallywrote.
I said I'm noticing now thatI'm not fighting as much is that
I'm more freezing.
And he wrote back to me and hegoes you, you can't say that
like it's not a thing that youknow, right, it's just something
(46:27):
that happened, like it's ahijack, it happens to you.
And I said okay, and he goes,so just reframe, kind of how you
thought that.
And a few minutes later I saidI got it.
And I said I'm cognitively awareof the motions that I'm going
through and it's not that all ofa sudden I'm like, oh, I'm in
freeze mode, it's just I'mpaying attention to what I'm
(46:48):
doing differently, because ithappened through my own
discovery of what I needed towork on that these other things
started allowing for myleadership to grow because I was
able to reframe my thinking bypausing more.
And he goes, that's it, he goes.
You have no idea how powerfulit is to be cognitively aware of
(47:08):
what is emotionally becoming apart.
You're now cognitively aware ofyour emotions in a much
different light Changedeverything.
It's that now it's a reminderto slow down, that tomorrow's
going to come, but smaller stepswill create a better tomorrow.
If I rush things and I said thisagain the other day is that if
(47:29):
you go up six and fall down four, that's a jump and it's a hard
hit down.
But if you go up two and falldown one, things will be fine
and that if something doesn'thappen, it's okay.
Don't put so much into thatthought as all right, let's
maybe ask a question again tosee if we can get the answer
(47:49):
that we want, or maybe we canactually realize that we should
just turn the page and startstart a different direction.
Um, and I and absolutely it wasa moment with edwin that I had
I had thought more things outthere to become more cognitively
aware of my emotions, andthat's what's allowed my
leadership bloom was thatconversation and the
(48:10):
conversation with my wife everyonce in a while, where she goes
always ask a question, you'llget more out of knowing what you
need to learn, based uponasking things that you need to
learn and not sitting on themand then just bearing it down.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
Well, you are very lucky to have Edwin as a
business partner to help in yourgrowth personally and with your
business, and then your wife aswell to help you on both sides.
Now, before we wrap up, thisconversation has been amazing.
Where can listeners connectwith you and learn more about
the work you're doing?
Through the McFadden Group.
Speaker 2 (48:52):
Oh, that's great.
So my website istmg-hospitalityca.
My email address ischristopher-hospitalitycom.
You can find me on LinkedIn,christopher McFadden.
I'm more active with myChristopher McFadden account and
then tie my McFadden Groupaccount into that because I like
(49:12):
the personalness coming from merather than just the mentality
coming from my company and onFacebook Instagram.
So the McFadden Group onFacebook and TMG the McFadden
Group on Instagram as well.
Speaker 1 (49:28):
Well, christopher, thank you for sharing your story
, your lessons and yourleadership with us, to everyone
tuning in.
If you found this episodevaluable, be sure to subscribe,
leave a review and share it withsomeone leading people first
change in hospitality.
And visit, of course, jason EBrooks dot com for more insights
(49:53):
, tools and resources to growyour leadership.
Until next time, keep showingup, Stay grounded in empathy and
remember, manage, lead, coach,repeat.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Christopher.
Thank you so much, Mr Brooks,thank you for your time.
Speaker 1 (50:11):
I appreciate this, sir, very much so Excellent, and
I will see you on the road.
I look forward to it, my friend.
Excellent, thank you, sir.
Welcome to the Leadership Table, where
conversations inspire, lead andelevate.
I'm your host, jason E Brooks,bringing you insights from top
leaders who are reshapingindustries through purpose,
leadership and culture, andtoday I'm joined by Christopher
McFadden, a restaurantoperations veteran turned
(00:26):
hospitality consultant andspeaker.
As the founder of the McFaddenGroup, christopher works with
leaders and teams to buildcultures rooted in empathy,
ownership and personal growth.
His message is clear In today'shospitality landscape,
leadership isn't about hittingmetrics.
It's about owning the moment,the mindset and the impact you
(00:50):
have on others.
But before we dive in, don'tforget to subscribe and share
this episode with someonebuilding culture in our industry
Now.
Christopher, thank you so much.
We met in person for the veryfirst time at Bar and Restaurant
Expo in Las Vegas.
(01:12):
I think that we talked viaonline a few times, but thank
you for joining me on the show.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
What an amazing invitation to have, jason.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, bar and Restaurant Expointroduction.
It was a neat moment for bothof us because we knew each other
and then got to know each other, which was great.
So, yeah, this is an amazingopportunity, so thank you again
for it.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Well, thank you for coming to the table Now.
You've walked the walk from VPof operations to building your
own consulting group.
What inspired you to start theMcFadden group and what have you
learned about leadership sincemaking that leap?
Speaker 2 (01:57):
You know, I think a big, a big thing for me was 25
years in restaurants.
I love this industry, I lovethis business, I love the nature
of taking care of people, andCOVID was a tricky moment for
all of us, but I think a bigthing that really shifted as I
was still in the business and wewere now reopening our doors,
(02:20):
if you will, with half capacityand just actually a little bit
less for what we could fit.
And it was this moment of youknow if we're going to do this
again, how are we going to do it.
We've seen what the corporatemodel looks like for COVID and
again, none of us knew what todo and we went up a little bit
more with some more steam on it.
But our number one thing I wasa partner and general manager
(02:42):
and director of the designrestaurants just outside
Vancouver and the tone weshifted with was let's put the
guests after our staff, becauseif we don't have our staff
walking in the door feeling safeand sound, then it doesn't make
any sense for pushing moreguests in the door that are
compromising the health andsafety of our team and that if
somebody walks in the door as astaff member, there should never
(03:04):
be a worry of anything, thatthey should feel like we're just
going to get greedy with howmany covers we're putting in the
book and how much money we'reputting in the bank, but rather,
if we do this in a differentway, we can't have guests unless
we have our staff.
Unless our staff are happy,we're not going to be pushing
our finances up in the marketshare that we need it to be.
We're not going to be pushingour finances up in the market
(03:26):
share that we need it to be, andvery successfully.
In September of that year 2020,we ended up doing 1,000 more
covers and 100,000 more inrevenue.
We didn't have a single COVIDcase and this was with 64 seats
instead of 143 seats in ouroriginal budget and we were a
powerhouse and I was superblessed.
As the BC Restaurant Foundationhad said.
The president said you were theexample that everybody should
(03:47):
have followed and I was likeholy cow, like the genuineness
to that.
But as that was all happening,I forgot that I should have
probably taken care of myselffirst and that I could always
put the light on and the sparkon, but inside, inside, it
wasn't good for really what Iknew and how I looked outside
(04:10):
and at the end of December 2021,I knew I had to step away.
I just wasn't in a healthyspace anymore.
I quit drinking about eightyears ago.
I got tagged as the sober song.
I started tasting wine again,thinking I had control over it,
and I didn't.
I went into a lost spiral andmy biggest thing was that if I'm
not leading myself intomaintaining a healthy and
(04:33):
confident and very structuredand organized life, then it
doesn't make any sense for me toreally be continuing to lead
people for this moment that I'min, and that I knew that I had
to back up for myself.
And end of December 2021, I leftmy partnership and that's when
I connected with my dear friend,edwin Kumar.
So it's been three years thatwe had launched Restaurant
(04:53):
Leadership 101.
And the two of us sat down andrealized that nobody talked
about emotional intelligence andsoft skill development in
restaurant leaders.
So we built a program and itwas interesting, because AI
wasn't really a thing I was evenaware of back then.
So it was a 10 month study onemotional intelligence and
building a program based uponthe foundations of what was out
(05:13):
there.
And then I went after gettingmy coaching certifications in
emotional intelligence withmaster class certifications as
well.
And then I got hospitality,leadership certification and
addiction recovery actually,because now I've been eight
years without a drop of hardalcohol and beer and almost
three years without a sip ofwine.
So, my pivot.
Everything in me had to comefirst in order for me to be the
(05:33):
best I could be for my teams.
And I did and I worked my tailoff at it.
But I realized how much moreinwardness I had to do to expose
myself on the outside.
So, yeah, the pivot happenedand the McFadden group
originally had launched throughwhat I was doing a restaurant
leadership, one-on-one withEdwin, but doing more one-to-one
(05:53):
coaching with leaders acrossrestaurants, still just more
one-to-one.
You know more of the hour longsessions or you know a few
different single sessions.
And then it was last summer thatI said I've been a professor
for the last couple of years inour college system up here in
Ontario.
I was watching a lot ofstudents have this gap between
(06:17):
international students,specifically domestic students
as well, but this gap betweeneducation and career and how do
I fill that centerpiece to it?
Well, but this gap betweeneducation and career and how do
I fill that centerpiece to it?
And I started helping themthrough career changes that they
were looking at or careerdirection that they were looking
at.
But I was doing it as a fullexploration of their core values
and developing their Russianintelligence to get them there.
(06:37):
And Edwin goes to me, he goes,you realize you're doing career
coaching, and I said, well, no,bless you sir.
I said no, I guess not, and Isaid my.
My attribute is what ifleadership we can look at as an
actionable state rather thanjust a positional state?
And if we're and I and I loveworking with management teams?
But what about everybody else?
What about the ones that wantto start growing in this
(06:59):
business?
What about the hostess that'sjust having a tough day and that
that has to be there?
But rather, what if she wantedto be there?
And creating that environmentwhere, if you can find more of
yourself to be a better versionof yourself for yourself first,
is it automatically translatesinto the people that are around
you and the guests that are withyou.
(07:21):
I think teams sing when you cansee them happy and I think it
changes the guest aspect ofthings.
So my entire position was let'sdo career coaching from here to
here and help people on thosesteps, on how to get there.
So, whether or not it's careertransition, whether or not it's
looking for the leveling up inthe business, whether it's
maintaining the same role thatthey're doing I've got waiters
that have worked for me for 50years because they never wanted
(07:44):
to manage but they were theleaders of the bunch.
So I think everybody in thespace needs to have an
opportunity to show what kind ofleadership that they can do
actionably.
So the McFadden group now hasbeen about a year focused on
career coaching with aleadership as an action kind of
tone to it my mic was actuallyoff, so it was off and I wasn't
(08:44):
sure if I was.
I'm not sure if it was a thingto say or not, because I was
like maybe we can cut that part.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
I'll bring it back Now.
There is definitely quite a bitfor our listeners to unpack in
that, and every single piece ofthat was all golden nuggets.
Now, even going back to theCOVID times, whenever you were
viewed as that shining examplefrom your brand owner of what
(09:14):
you can do within your locationsto not only overcome the
challenges by putting the teamfirst in order to be more
effective with your customers,to to have better culture with
your customers, but to alsoincrease covers by over a
(09:35):
thousand covers during that timeframe for the year through
COVID into September.
Now, a lot of that, though,does cause burnout.
A lot of that does cause stress, and you took from that
different ways of how to view.
(09:56):
What am I doing?
What is my personal life goingthrough?
How is that connected with whatI'm doing at work?
And now, how can I take what Ijust went through and teach
others, have them skip thatburnout phase that a lot of
people within our industry goesthrough?
(10:16):
You speak openly about mentalhealth and burnout, which a lot
of leaders avoid.
Why is this a crucialconversation in hospitality
right now?
Speaker 2 (10:31):
I think my biggest shift was not so much of the
what but the why, why, why,what's our why and our what?
What is it that makes us dowhat we do, but why?
What's our why and our what?
What is it that makes us dowhat we do, but why?
Why does it make us do that?
And I think I I just I'm anadvocate for transparency and I
(10:52):
think transparency is the onething that really empowers
individuals on your team.
It empowers teams is that itshifts the tone.
When you're fully trusting of anindividual that works with you
Um, I don't like saying for you,but with you and I think when
you build that trust, it allowsthat empowerment.
But you have to trust yourselfand knowing what you're doing is
(11:15):
in the best light of yourself.
Because if you're at the top ofthe pedestal, even if you're at
the starting point of yourleadership, positionally, as a
role in management roles Gosh,you really got to be good at
what you do, based upon what youlove to do, because you
understand exactly why you wantto do it.
And this isn't about puttingyou in a spotlight to say, well,
(11:37):
you know, I'm the manager ofthis room.
This is well.
No, it's the action of whatwe're doing, and I think the
mental health conversation is sopowerful in our entire culture
today, but it's the littlethings that we do with it.
It's the simple thing.
When a staff member walks inthe door and it was how are you?
I would say to my team ifyou're not having a good day,
(11:58):
send me a note.
I don't need to know why, justif today's not your day, take it
.
We can figure out the section.
I have to take a section for anight.
I'll take a section for a night, but the best thing that can be
done is where you're at inwanting to come here because you
feel like you're in a goodplace.
(12:19):
I was having a conversation witha client yesterday and I said
how are you with your emotionswhen it comes to heading into
work?
And it was.
It was interesting because shesaid um, well, I'm really good
at, you know, not having outsideinfluences affect me, you know,
when I come into the workplace.
And I said what's funny is thatI used to catch people off
(12:41):
guard in interviews where firstI would catch them off guard by
flipping their resume over andpushing it to the side and
they'd go oh, do you not want totalk about my resume Like
that's what got you here.
I know you can do the job.
What'd you have for breakfastthis morning?
Do you have any pets?
What do your parents do for aliving?
What was your schooling like?
How did you like going to thiscollege?
And and they were like I didn'texpect an interview to be like
(13:08):
this.
I said the first thing, that'sthe most important part to this
is are we right for you?
And she goes, but shouldn't mebe right for you?
And I said we'll get there Ifthis doesn't seem like the right
fit for you.
No grudges, no like.
I understand that this is how Ilike to do things.
Is that let's just have aconversation.
Taking care of people is thestarting point of having and
building relationships.
Selling is relationships.
It's easy to sell when you'renot selling.
(13:30):
It's easy to sell when you'vecreated a trustworthiness with
your guests and with you, withyour team, to feel fully
protected and taken care of.
And then I said at the end ofthe interview and that sales
pitch that every and I'm surewe've, I know I've done it and
you've probably done it too isthat that last sentiment of
trying to get the job is just tolet you know I don't bring my
(13:51):
outside problems in and Ireplied back and I said, sure
you do.
And they went what?
And I was like of course you do, you're a human being, there's
absolutely everything rightabout that.
But the difference is how youare able to manage those to be
able to provide the service thatwe'd like to for our guests,
(14:12):
and you know the level that we'dlike to be at.
But if I don't recognize thatwhen you walk in the door and
just expect you to do the grind,then I haven't done my job as
the leader at the top of thetier with my team by recognizing
what's going on with my teamand that if I'm not aware of
that and paying attention to it,then I've completely deflated
(14:34):
what the purpose of what we'redoing in hospitality is.
Hospitality is the gesture oftaking care of somebody.
I watched something the otherday where it was a documentary
and somebody said thanks foryour hospitality and it was
great because I was watching andthis was a new message that I
put on LinkedIn was thathospitality is a thing that we
provide.
Service is a thing that we do.
Hospitality isn't just food andbeverage, it's not just hotels.
(15:00):
It's not just accommodations,it's not just tourism, it's the
act of looking after people.
It's not just accommodations,it's not just tourism, it's the
act of looking after people.
So if we do better at that butif myself as the director of the
restaurant, as a partner of therestaurant or a junior manager,
senior manager, it doesn'treally matter or the lead server
on the team, it's all about howwe salute our team members,
knowing that they're taken careof when they walk in the door
(15:20):
and that we have interest inthem, and I think that changes
the complete tone and that'swhat allowed for the success
with BC Restaurant Foundation'spresident to say you're setting
the tone, you know you've donevery well through this, like
great.
We were also very lucky too.
We had a vaccination centerthat was attached to us that a
dear friend of ours had set up.
So if there was any sparevaccines at the end of the day
(15:41):
we got offered them.
So my restaurant team inBritish Columbia restaurants got
put beside first responders.
So it went first responders toget vaccines and then restaurant
and my team was the first fullyvaccinated staff in all of
British Columbia and it wasfunny enough because I was
quality checking tables andactually offering vaccines to
(16:01):
guests.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Were you administering them yourself or
were you just sitting next?
Speaker 2 (16:08):
door.
I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'mkidding.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
You're going to take this right, yeah.
Take this shot and take thisshot.
Take this shot, no.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
It's a whole difference of just, you know, we
did it, we just, and it's notthat it was just there, it's now
.
What I'm doing as a coach isand a consultant is helping
teams see past just the roleit's positions is incredibly
important, but if your peoplearen't built properly for it,
we're satisfied or happy right.
There's always a struggle inwhat we're doing in service
(16:42):
because the industry still isgrowing back, if you will, and
especially in different parts ofour continent and where we see
it more actively with you knowbeing, you know, border partners
here and understanding what weboth do in our industry to help.
But you know, I think it startswith transparency and the more
honest we are with what'shappening in front of us and
that thing that's just in frontof us instead of down the road,
(17:06):
allows the down the road easierto get to.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
So tell us.
You know there are a lot oflisteners from the US, quite a
few from Canada and across thepond as well.
But how is?
How is the environment rightnow in British Columbia, when it
(17:28):
comes down to the team, when itcomes you seeing in your area,
when it comes down to bridgingthat generational gap within
Canada?
Speaker 2 (18:00):
You know, what's interesting is that I and it's
great because I bounce back andforth to BC quite a bit because
I do have clients there but mywife and I had moved to Southern
Ontario where I grew up becauseand I said this on video the
other day was sometimes you haveto reprioritize your priorities
, and it was about me being here, because of a lot of family
illness that came upon my family, that I needed to be here for.
My wife worked excessively toPrince Edward Island and it's
(18:21):
interesting especially bringingup the British Columbia point is
being removed from it as acitizen, but still being
involved with it as a consultant.
It's neat to now see it outsideof the province because it
doesn't become as personalanymore, so you have an
(18:41):
opportunity to view it with asecond set of eyes, because I
know Vancouver so well I livedthere for 13 years and I know
the feeling of the city.
It's a very relaxed city andwhen you see a relaxed city
start to build emotions upbecause of the shifts that are
happening and you see moreanxiety, more stress, more
(19:04):
burnout.
Drinking is still a problem inrestaurants, right, whether or
not we want to talk about it asheavily as we used to talk about
it.
So, seeing it, I think nowthere's more of a whether or not
we want to talk about it asheavily as we used to talk about
it.
So, seeing it, I think nowthere's more of a.
The hardest part was people justtrying to convince themselves
to stay in the business basedupon the fact that technology
has become super heavy.
(19:24):
Ai has become incredibly heavy.
We've been able to have theseadvancements in how fast we can
make things operate, but we'restill in the people component of
the industry.
We're still this person toperson and that's still a
requirement of what we do, and Ithink people feel safer today
because of the shifts that arehappening.
But more so is that we're stillgrowing and learning, because
(19:45):
if something happened againtomorrow in our world, are we
prepared for going in and stickhandling it again, or do we
remember exactly what we did,going in and stick handling it
again, right, or do we rememberexactly what we did?
Um, and now seeing in ontariowhen I moved back to here in
2022 was now seeing downtowntoronto, which is much bigger
than vancouver, and seeing whatcovid repair looked like in now,
(20:08):
a city that's got three timesthe amount of citizens, and
trying to pay attention to that,as I understood how it was
there at the time, and I thinkour growth is coming along and I
think there's moreopportunities for people to
trust how businesses and howmanagement teams and how
directorship teams and ownershipteams are taking care of their
teams directly.
(20:30):
Is that there's more of aninspiration for people to
realize how important the peopleare that work with you and not
just the customers that arewalking in the door, and I think
that's been a huge strive inhow we're growing in our
industry again.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Do you think that our industry right now is probably
the most battlefield tested whenit comes to emotional
intelligence and to things thatare going on within the economy?
Does it because I know.
(21:06):
When this first happened,everyone, every study, viewed
the effects of COVID ontoeveryone from age 10 up to age
20, even 30.
And during that first threeyears of what that did not only
(21:28):
to people in school but to work,to people in school but to work
, especially the hospitalityindustry Do you feel that they
are the most battle ready forthe next big thing to happen, or
does that emotionalintelligence now?
Has it been fractured some?
(21:48):
Has the culture been fractured,and can they withstand
something else similar to thatif it were to happen again
sometime soon?
Speaker 2 (22:00):
I question, I think I think I mean the first part of
emotional intelligence isself-awareness and getting to
know yourself more.
It's when you get to the secondpart of managing that that it's
a.
It's a, it's a process.
It took three years of studyfor me to understand who I am
(22:21):
today, because of knowing what,what wall I hit.
And then the speed bumps thatshowed up even in those early
times.
And then me hitting a wall, andnow, when speed bumps show up,
the wall doesn't show up anymore, because I know exactly how to
walk myself to the fork in theroad If I head down the wrong
(22:42):
way and I'm like, ah, I know howto back myself up and do it the
right way.
Now it takes work.
It's not that I'm perfectly puttogether, but the emotionalness
of really becoming aware ofyour why and to create your what
.
But once you get theself-awareness part and I think
(23:03):
we're pretty confidently gettingthere with people is the
managing part of it is where Isee it happen with clients,
where that's where the break isstarting.
But they're very empathetic andthey're super motivated and
energized and they love beingout and about within the social
skills department.
But I was like but why?
(23:24):
What happened.
You missed the management partof it.
You've got all this and thisfigured out and it's that I'm
stuck in understanding exactlywhere I'm going with things.
I'm fully aware of what's goinginto our industry and the
emotions that are behind it andhow I have to drive myself for
it, but I'm having a problemmanaging it, and I think that's
where the emotional intelligencehas.
(23:46):
The most tricky part for peopleis now that you've discovered
all these things about yourselfand sometimes things that you go
wow, this is oh okay.
Like I go through 60 differentcore values in four different
places, you know, in a workspace, if you will.
And it's amazing when we'regoing through them is that all
(24:09):
of a sudden, everyone's stillout.
You get somebody who goes huh,I don't know.
And I had a client yesterdaythat public service was not very
important to them and I waslike what?
And as soon as they said it, Isaid why?
Because every other core valuethat you had a moment ago that
was important and very importantis the basis point for why you
do public service.
Where's that gap?
(24:30):
What's happening?
Why don't you think that that'simportant?
And funny enough, as we workthrough, the entire thing went
back to the personal SWOTanalysis to measure their
strengths, weaknesses,opportunities and threats.
They didn't have anyopportunities put in there.
Now their opportunities startedshowing up in the conversation
and then we went back toquestions that I had had for
them in their first session twoweeks before, and there was
three questions that they didn'tanswer and this this time
(24:53):
around, they answered them, butanswered them with confidence,
certainty, fully understandingwhere they had gotten themselves
to and held on to understandingthat.
That it allowed the entireconversation just to bloom and
by the end of it it was oh, andI said, manage that you got to
hold it.
This is you.
(25:19):
You're the only person thatspends an entire day with
yourself, so own it and whenyou're having a tricky part of
the day, figure out how you'regoing to best manage that for
yourself.
Everything else becomes simpler, not easy.
Simpler Because you're startingto understand it in a different
way, because you understandyourself more.
So I think the emotionalintelligence spectrum and
(25:40):
conversation is super importantand I think more people are apt
to understanding it now becausepeople have to come first and
when we reprioritize that, thefirst people to the table needs
to be yourself, and then yourteam, and then your guests.
You'll have more guests, you'llhave more staff and you'll have
a better presence as the leaderin the room.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
It sounds like that conversation was one of those
really breaking down the wallnot even breaking down the wall,
because breaking down the wallis a very harsh treatment that
takes a hammer or explosives butit it does sound like there was
a little bit of chiseling andthen removing of bricks and
(26:23):
getting down to the barefoundation and then building
that back up the way that theyunderstood why each brick was
laid the way that it is.
And, speaking of laying bricks,it does take a lot for the
growth aspect for that to happen.
(26:43):
I know we just spoke throughhow do we think that the teams
these days, how they dopost-COVID, going through that,
from teenagers to young adults,even to middle-aged adults as
well.
But there still has to be,there has to be a growth period.
(27:07):
Even if we think we've stoppedor we've paused or we're going
through challenges, that causesus not to growth, there is still
growth that is going on as aperson.
So what are your thoughts onhow people grow from here
(27:28):
internally, not just with theirbusiness, not just to make their
business more healthy?
How do they grow themselves?
Speaker 2 (27:39):
One thing that I and I'm going to relate this
actually to working with youngerteams was when I was a kid.
I loved it when we were hostingdinner with family over and my
parents were like we're going toopen the dining room and I was
like great, and we had theseblack and white show plates and
napkin rings to make yournapkins look fancy on a table.
And I used to obsessively loveto set the dining room table at
(28:01):
10 years old and I never paidattention to that.
Being so vivid in why theintention of making something
perfect in a visual componentwas why I drove restaurants the
way I did.
But I also came fromrestaurants where you line
tables up with a string.
Every glass and piece ofcutlery couldn't be a quarter of
an inch off.
(28:22):
But now getting to see theyounger generations coming into
the business, a lot moreopenness and voices, a lot more
being heard or hoping to beheard, it's that old guard
leadership and young guard thatthey're coming in and that it's
about bringing bringing your son45 yesterday and it's about
(28:43):
bringing myself down to ayounger generation.
Understand how they're thinkingcompared to how I was just yes,
boss, sure, that's what theboss says, that's what you do.
So I started paying attentionto the visual component that
everybody's on their phones.
People are so visually heavynow and I thought what if I was
to start showing them examplesof how table settings needed to
be based upon setting oneflawlessly and one just a little
(29:06):
off, and then presenting thesame dishes of food to them,
serve to them perfectly on oneperfect table and just a little
off on the other one, just tosee how an 18-year-old was going
to understand why that was soimportant.
And when I started payingattention to that, I started
realizing how much more visual Ithink the world has become and
(29:27):
what it's trying to see andhopefully have.
I think the connection point iseverything right.
If you've got a yesterday and atoday, well, it's those two
things that are going to helpyour tomorrow.
And the visual component hasbeen a big thing that I learned
that younger generations neededto have in order to succeed, and
(29:48):
that alone inspired me to nowdoing things in different ways
of how I manage myself through aday, how I make notes around my
house on little post-it notes,right, just to do little
reminders for myself.
It's the visual component thatI had learned that the younger
generation was doing really wellin their development.
I thought you know what?
Maybe I can continue my owndevelopment by shifting a little
(30:09):
bit of my daily, my dailiness,in order to continue my own
growth.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
I'll tell you what.
They've not only mastered thevisual aspect, because they're
always looking at the finerdetails when it comes down to
short form content and long formcontent, but another thing that
they've done well is that theyhave really grown to giving
(30:38):
automatic feedback.
Yes, it's digital, and theystill have growth to do when it
comes down to person to personfeedback being given.
But if you think about, I justdid a keynote in Dayton, ohio
yesterday, and one of the thingsthat we talked about was how we
(31:02):
look at Gen Z and how Gen Z isso accustomed to telling people
how they feel, or ranking howinexperienced was automatically.
If you think about Facebook alike, a love, a support think
about LinkedIn.
(31:22):
If you think about Twitter, x,instagram it doesn't matter
TikTok, everything, music,netflix, you name it If you
think about how much feedbackthey give, they give more
feedback in this generationright now, all the way down to
(31:45):
alpha and beta.
They give so much more feedbackthan any other generation has
given, except they do itdigitally.
And then we talked about now wethen bring in these people,
these amazing people, into ourbusinesses, and how much
opportunity do you give them togive you feedback about the
(32:08):
business, about the shift, aboutwhat works well, about what
does not, and everyone got quietlike, wow, I actually don't.
And I said, think about this.
Think about if we gave them thespace and the opportunity to
give feedback.
Not feedback that changes yourwhole brand, all the blood,
(32:30):
sweat and tears that you putinto how you do business, but
just feedback on what's goingwell.
Do you realize how much moregrowth, how much more
opportunity and insight that wecan have and then how much more
we will connect with them forthem to truly be a part of our
business?
So I definitely feel everythingyou slung right there.
(32:55):
So a few more questions, a fewmore questions.
Now you've been sharing.
Speaker 2 (33:00):
If I may say, I love what you said and it's I used to
have.
Um, I created a front of housemanual that was just every role
that was in front of house, theresponsibilities,
responsibilities.
What an open to a closetheoretically looked like in
that position.
And it was funny because forservers, I had put their yes as
(33:21):
your role, but not limited to,so that they understood that you
still had to answer the guestsand you know, no, no, I'm a
server, I don't do that.
We got rid of that.
But the difference was when I,when we, when we bring somebody
onto our team, we know what therole is that we're looking for
to be filled.
However, I had a 17-year-oldgirl best interview ever when
(33:47):
she walked in the door just shyof turning 16.
And by 17, I made her my leadhostess.
And she goes, oh, and I saidrun the door, you know what we
do, but now let's keep growingit.
And she was you're the one thatruns the restaurant.
I said but I'm not running thedoor.
Hey, expo, right, expo was ourfront of house position.
(34:09):
And I said what do we need todo to grow this through, now
that we're doing takeout anddelivery?
And now guests are back in therestaurant.
How are we going to make thisstronger so that the flow
doesn't get interrupted?
And it was like, well, butyou're the GM.
And I was like, but you're theexpo.
I know what we should be doing,but if I just bring you things
(34:32):
versus you having theopportunity to bring me things,
the idea of growth doesn't existanymore, because now you're
just listening to autocraticness, which I believe needs to exist
, based upon me runningfinancials.
You don't need to know that.
However, when it comes to theservant side of the leadership
the difference in havingsomebody go, you know what?
I bet you we could save a bitof time and provide a better
(34:55):
guest experience and an easierteam atmosphere if we were to do
it this way.
Great, let's give it a shot.
And I think opening that doorfor your team to have the
opportunity to think on theirown with what they're doing
allows for the growth aspect ofthings to scale quite quickly,
because it can't just be ledfrom the top down right, bottom,
bottom up is a great way to atleast open up that door of
(35:17):
conversation to go how do youfeel about this?
And it catches them off guard.
They're like, uh, I didn'texpect to get asked that.
Well, you've been working herefor a while, or you just joined
here after six months.
How do you feel?
Like?
What are we doing?
Right, but the shift of makingpeople think out their positions
so that they can grow.
It's great, especially with theyounger generation wanting to
(35:39):
have that feedback andconversation.
And hey, can you just hear meout for a minute?
Sure, not a problem, right?
Is that it changes everythingand it just makes a smoother
service, because you have onegoal at the end of the day, and
that's taking care of yourguests.
That's what we're doing as abusiness.
But when the team knows thatthey're taking care of each
other, the guest relationshipsbloom.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
It shifts the whole human connection in every
direction, Absolutely.
Now you've been sharing yourmessage more from stages across
the industry.
What has that experience taughtyou about leadership, how to
(36:21):
communicate, and even yourself?
Speaker 2 (36:26):
leadership, how to communicate and even yourself.
We've become so digital thatZoom and the world of Teams has
allowed for us to grow.
But the moment of shakingsomebody's hand and saying hello
(36:49):
in person is everything to me.
I love my extrovertedness.
My wife is super introverted.
We were at church when we firstmoved back to Burlington and
the pastor's, like you know,shake somebody's hand and Joe's
like, do it, go for a walk?
And I was like, yes, right, andall of a sudden I'm touring the
church to say, hey, chrisMcFadden, the back of the city,
(37:11):
kind of a moment.
I really want us just tounderstand how important people
are to what we do.
But very much so as just ahuman being, is that I like to
go out and enjoy evenings out.
I like to go out for lunch.
I like to go out like we all do, right.
But being on the servicecomponent of it, in the actual
industry of it, and now helpinglarger amounts of teams and now
having this message to anaudience that I've never met
(37:33):
before, it's the same, it's thesame conversation, it's just
perspective of how it's ingested.
And that moment of somebody tocome up to me after the show's
done or the conversation's doneto say hey, that really hit a
mark for me, like thanks formentioning that.
I just appreciate that and Ithink the more we open up
(38:05):
conversation you know and veryblessed that we can still do
this very heavily through all ofthe technology channels but
when you see a room filled andyou see an expo filled and a
convention filled with peoplethat are all getting back into
the, isn't it nice to be back inthe people side of what we're
doing.
It's brilliant.
And the guest speaking spots forme is it gives me an
opportunity to meet a bunch ofpeople I've never met before and
maybe not shake their hands butat least to look them in the
(38:27):
face.
And I'm one of those peoplethat I kind of I grabbed at
Gordon Ramsay.
You know, nice to see you.
Every time in KitchenNightmares when he walks into a
room and I started doing thatall the time and people go have
we met?
I'm like no, but we've juststarted the conversation.
And they go, oh, oh, okay.
I'm like, hey, nice to see you.
(38:47):
They're like we've never metbefore.
I'm like I know, but now right,and I would do that in the
restaurant, now that I'm doingthat when I'm at conventions and
expos to say, hey, nice to seeyou.
People are like what Doesn'tmatter, right, is that it shifts
your mindset for a second,because all I did was make you
think have we met before youlook familiar?
(39:07):
No, right, but I just wanted tokind of catch you off guard
with a different introduction.
Speaker 1 (39:11):
That shapes the energy for that conversation to
move forward in ways that peoplecannot imagine.
I love that and I'm going tohave to use that as well,
Absolutely so.
Now I have two questions that Iask every single guest at the
leadership table.
(39:32):
Now, if you could sit at aleadership table with three
others, alive or from history,who would you choose and why?
Speaker 2 (39:48):
You know, what's interesting is I was thinking
about this as I began my daytoday and I think I taught
restaurant leadership atCentennial College a couple, a
few semesters ago and that was aquestion for our students was
you know who is who's yourleader that you would want to
sit at a table with?
And you know, for me, I love, Ilove watching the.
(40:09):
You know, the hierarchy ofthese celebrities that exist in
the world are those verypowerful people that made these,
made these fantasticdiscoveries and decisions and
growth aspects for all of us tobe able to get where we are
today, and decisions and growthaspects for all of us to be able
to get where we are today.
But I think a big differencefor me is we've gone through a
(40:30):
big shift of what's happened inour education system up here in
Canada.
Professor jobs, academic roles,admin roles are all being lost
within our country because ofour international student shift
and I'm going to actually put myprogram directors and deans on
my list of leadership teams thatI would actually like to sit
down and be at that table tounderstand what they actually
(40:53):
went through when thisannouncement got made.
I know what it felt like as aprofessor, but the associate
dean, the deans, the programcoordinators, the program
directors.
If I could sit down with my teamfrom Fanshawe, toronto and
Centennial College, all in thesame room, to say what did this
(41:14):
shift look like as the top ofthe food chain in these schools,
to be able to hopefully keepthe hospitality and tourism
programs alive, how pivots weregoing to happen.
To hopefully keep thehospitality and tourism programs
alive, how pivots were going tohappen.
So my shout-outs go out to mywheelhouse of Damien Holborn,
michelle Kane, kristen Straneyfrom Centennial College and Nora
(41:37):
Kuder and our Dean, tanya fromFanshawe, toronto.
Those would be the five leadersthat I would like to sit in a
room with and hear them walkthrough what they had to go
through that allowed for theschools of hospitality to
continue what they're doing forthe betterness of our businesses
(41:58):
and our industries and oureducation out there.
So, yeah, it's the people thatinspired me to give and gave me
the opportunity to become aprofessor in hospitality schools
.
Those are the five that I wouldlove to sit down and say what
did this feel like going throughin the level of your roles
(42:23):
within these educationalinstitutes?
So those are my leaders.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
That's incredible, and your why is very impactful,
because it's not just about youwanting to be there at the table
for your own gain, it's for allof the professors, all of those
that want to learn or that wantto teach.
So that's a very powerfulanswer to that question.
(42:50):
I do have one more question aswell.
You know, we we we have lots ofconversations that shape, shift
and move us.
Some of those conversations arenegative ones that even we
still learn from, about how wewant to be like or not want to
be like, and then we have thosethat the words are just put in
(43:13):
place in just the right way,that it also helps to reshape
how we think about leadership.
So what's one conversation Iknow you've had many, but what's
one conversation that reshapedhow you show up as a leader?
Speaker 2 (43:35):
I love when conversations show up and you
take them.
It's the ingesting ingestingwhat is being said instead of
looking, instead of the hamsterin your mind, just running and
going oh, I got an answer.
For that is, it's the pause.
And, um, it was interesting.
And I I had this conversationwith somebody yesterday um,
(43:57):
edwin and I, when we had createdrestaurant leadership 101, we
had done a whole section on onthe fight freeze, um, fear and
fawn moment, and one day, I meanwe had been teaching it and I
think I had always lived in fear, in in just moments and always
worst case scenario.
I was one of those people thattried to write the last chapter
(44:19):
before I started the firstchapter and it was always like,
wow, this is probably going tohappen, right, and um, when I
had quit drinking, I startedbecoming quite confident in
conversations with people andmaybe a little over, a little
overzealous on the questionsthat I was asking, and I had
said out loud one day to my wifejoanne, I said I've realized
(44:43):
and learned something recentlywas that always ask a question?
And she goes what?
And I said I realized that youshould always ask a question.
Don't sit on something.
I said it'll make me strongerat what I'm doing and how I'm
growing in the changes that I'mseeing in my own life, the
mistakes that I had made, goingback to tasting wine and it
(45:03):
becoming irresponsible of me,the mistakes that I had made
going back to tasting wine andit becoming irresponsible of me.
But my one thing that I hadsaid was always ask a question
because there's a 50, 50 shot.
You're going to get the answerthat you want and if you don't
get the answer that you want,that means you still have 50% of
a chance to reframe it and askit a different way after you
think it out, to potentially getthe answer that you wanted.
(45:25):
And my wife throws this in myface every once in a while.
She's, like you know, a wise manonce told me when we were, when
I started seeing that more, um,just more in my years of the
last few years since I reallybrought that up, um more so in
conversations with people, therewas a day that edwin I was
(45:45):
doing a coaching.
I was sitting in one of edwin'sexecutive coaching things just
to watch how he was doing hiscoaching and it was a great
invitation that he had sent mein and we he brought up in this
coaching session with theseexecutives and not restaurant.
Uh, about the fear and fightmodel, and um, and I, I wrote so
he says how are you doing withthe whole amygdala hijack?
(46:06):
And this is where I actuallywrote.
I said I'm noticing now thatI'm not fighting as much is that
I'm more freezing.
And he wrote back to me and hegoes you, you can't say that
like it's not a thing that youknow, right, it's just something
(46:27):
that happened, like it's ahijack, it happens to you.
And I said okay, and he goes,so just reframe, kind of how you
thought that.
And a few minutes later I saidI got it.
And I said I'm cognitively awareof the motions that I'm going
through and it's not that all ofa sudden I'm like, oh, I'm in
freeze mode, it's just I'mpaying attention to what I'm
(46:48):
doing differently, because ithappened through my own
discovery of what I needed towork on that these other things
started allowing for myleadership to grow because I was
able to reframe my thinking bypausing more.
And he goes, that's it, he goes.
You have no idea how powerfulit is to be cognitively aware of
(47:08):
what is emotionally becoming apart.
You're now cognitively aware ofyour emotions in a much
different light Changedeverything.
It's that now it's a reminderto slow down, that tomorrow's
going to come, but smaller stepswill create a better tomorrow.
If I rush things and I said thisagain the other day is that if
(47:29):
you go up six and fall down four, that's a jump and it's a hard
hit down.
But if you go up two and falldown one, things will be fine
and that if something doesn'thappen, it's okay.
Don't put so much into thatthought as all right, let's
maybe ask a question again tosee if we can get the answer
(47:49):
that we want, or maybe we canactually realize that we should
just turn the page and startstart a different direction.
Um, and I and absolutely it wasa moment with edwin that I had
I had thought more things outthere to become more cognitively
aware of my emotions, andthat's what's allowed my
leadership bloom was thatconversation and the
(48:10):
conversation with my wife everyonce in a while, where she goes
always ask a question, you'llget more out of knowing what you
need to learn, based uponasking things that you need to
learn and not sitting on themand then just bearing it down.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
Well, you are very lucky to have Edwin as a
business partner to help in yourgrowth personally and with your
business, and then your wife aswell to help you on both sides.
Now, before we wrap up, thisconversation has been amazing.
Where can listeners connectwith you and learn more about
the work you're doing?
Through the McFadden Group.
Speaker 2 (48:52):
Oh, that's great.
So my website istmg-hospitalityca.
My email address ischristopher-hospitalitycom.
You can find me on LinkedIn,christopher McFadden.
I'm more active with myChristopher McFadden account and
then tie my McFadden Groupaccount into that because I like
(49:12):
the personalness coming from merather than just the mentality
coming from my company and onFacebook Instagram.
So the McFadden Group onFacebook and TMG the McFadden
Group on Instagram as well.
Speaker 1 (49:28):
Well, christopher, thank you for sharing your story
, your lessons and yourleadership with us, to everyone
tuning in.
If you found this episodevaluable, be sure to subscribe,
leave a review and share it withsomeone leading people first
change in hospitality.
And visit, of course, jason EBrooks dot com for more insights
(49:53):
, tools and resources to growyour leadership.
Until next time, keep showingup, Stay grounded in empathy and
remember, manage, lead, coach,repeat.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Christopher.
Thank you so much, Mr Brooks,thank you for your time.
Speaker 1 (50:11):
I appreciate this, sir, very much so Excellent, and
I will see you on the road.
I look forward to it, my friend.
Excellent, thank you, sir.
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