173: The 80% Rule: How Leaders Can Overcome Fear, Stress, and Self-Doubt | Derek Sloan

Why does stress feel so normal in the workplace? Why does our mind default to the worst case scenario? And what’s the cost of this being our normal day to day life? 

In this episode, Damon sits down with Derek Sloan, who’s a licensed therapist, executive coach, and founder of Abridge Leadership to explore why so many professionals silently battle negativity and self-doubt, and what leaders can do to break the cycle. 

Whether you're navigating organizational change, dealing with anxious thoughts, or trying to model vulnerability in a remote workplace, this episode offers practical tools backed by psychology and made for the real world. 

In this episode you’ll learn: 

• What The 80% Rule is—and how it can transform how you lead 
• The hidden cost of “normalized” workplace stress 
• Why vulnerability is a leadership superpower (when done right) 
• The difference between confidence and self-efficacy 
• How to spot fear-based thinking on your team 
• Practical ways leaders can create clarity, safety, and connection 
• And so much more! 

Timestamps: 

00:21 – Why our brains default to negativity (60,000 thoughts, 80% negative) 

01:53 – The thought-emotion-behavior chain: how negativity spreads 

03:42 – What happens when dysfunction is normalized at work 

05:45 – Breaking down The 80% Rule (3 surprising stats) 

09:00 – Addressing real pain vs. future-focused fear 

10:25 – The traps leaders fall into under stress 

12:23 – A case study: when a promotion becomes a source of burnout 

16:05 – What leaders can do during times of uncertainty 

18:45 – The power of focusing on controllables 

19:24 – 3 controllables: showing up as your best, staying hopeful, being transparent 

22:30 – Why vulnerability matters more than ever 

25:15 – Healthy vs. unhealthy vulnerability: where leaders get it wrong 

29:09 – Understanding fear: how our brains exaggerate the future 

33:27 – Self-efficacy vs. confidence—and why both matter 

36:05 – How to give better feedback (that actually develops talent) 

39:14 – Recognizing negativity loops in your team 

41:39 – Why listening—not fixing—is your leadership edge 

44:00 – The post-COVID shift: employees expect to be cared for 

45:32 – Can remote work ever match in-person connection? 

48:21 – Why loneliness is a hidden workplace epidemic 

50:15 – Final takeaway: Take inventory. Where are you now—and how long have you been there? 

 

About the Guest: 

Derek Sloan is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC), Certified Clinical Trauma Professional (CCTP), and National Certified Counselor (NCC), He has experience in providing mental health and behavioral health services to individuals, couples, and groups. He founded and continues to operate a private practice in Kentucky. 

Derek is also a Certified Executive Coach and has a passion for leadership development. This has been a lifelong pursuit through his graduate degree in organizational leadership, building businesses, and leadership coaching/consulting. He works with executive leaders in top-level and industry-leading organizations, helping them enhance their emotional intelligence, communication skills, and decision-making abilities. His mission is to help organizations achieve their goals by prioritizing both leadership and mental health. 

Resources & Mentions: 

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