July 21, 2025 • 65 mins
#150 Rob Innes from Rybuild shares his powerful journey through debilitating construction-related anxiety and how he eventually learned to manage it. His raw account provides insight into the hidden mental health challenges that plague the construction industry, particularly for high-performing perfectionists who shoulder immense responsibility.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
But yeah, I don't know how many nights I lay on
that couch at night because Icouldn't sleep.
I didn't want to wake my wife.
I'd go and sit on the couch andI'd be shaking and I just
couldn't sleep and every nightI'd say I'm going to get up and
I'm going to work, I'm going tofix my problems, but I just it's
like a brick wall is in frontof you.
You cannot get off that couch.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
G'day guys.
Welcome back to another episodeof Level Up.
We are back in the shed thisafternoon for another cracking
episode.
Looking forward to this onebecause we're going to talk
about a few things that wehaven't gone into depth on the
podcast before.
So just stay tuned and we'llsee where it gets to.
But I guarantee if you stickaround, you're in for a cracking
episode Today.
(00:45):
We've got Rob from Rybuild withus.
How are you, buddy, for acracking episode?
Today we've got Rob fromRyebuild with us.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
How are you buddy?
Yeah, good, Good, Dwayne.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Mate.
I am looking forward to thisconversation because we're going
to dive down the anxiety rabbithole a little bit.
But before we get into that,you and I we've spoken for a
long time, I think on instagramthere's been a few questions
backwards and forwards, but then, um, like face to face, we've
(01:13):
probably only really caught upin the last what six months yeah
, pretty much yeah um actually.
No, it'd be long, it's probablyeight months yeah well, I
started.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
I started with the launchpad.
What's that?
Three or four months ago?
Five months ago?
But yeah, I've been messagingyou before that.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yeah, but then before that you reached out because
we've got one of your guysworking for us now.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
That's correct, yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
So yeah, Rob's also now a member of Live, Life Build
an Elevate program.
He's definitely kicking somegoals there, yeah.
I love it, it's good Mate, takeus back.
How did you get in the industry?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Okay, so I've been around construction and building
industry all my life prettymuch.
My dad was a developer Beforethat.
He actually was in real estatein the early days of Brisbane.
I originally come from Roma,yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
We were farmers Country boy.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Pardon Country boy.
Yeah, born and bred country boy, but I pretty much grew up in
the city and the old man was.
He was in real estate for acompany called Dalgety's.
They were developers and thenfrom there he ended up being the
managing director of a bigdevelopment company here in
Brisbane who pretty well shapeda lot of Brisbane's landmark
(02:27):
icon landmarks around town.
Yeah, probably the most famousone that everyone will know
about, it's the Fortitude Valley.
He's the guy who pretty wellkicked off what it is today.
Yeah, and I actually worked onsome of the buildings in
Fortitude Valley back when I wasan apprentice.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Yeah, awesome, yeah.
And, man, that place haschanged a lot back when I was an
apprentice.
Yeah awesome and, man, thatplace has changed a lot.
I remember growing up we weretold you do not go there.
It was a wild joint.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
You went there to buy drugs and if you're a homeless
mate or you wanted to find alady for the night, that's what
it was like.
Yeah, Apparently, the councilwent to him and said, listen, we
want to do something with thevalley.
What's your idea?
And he came up with her foodand restaurant and entertainment
precinct.
And what have we gotten, almost40 years later there?
Speaker 2 (03:08):
look at it now yeah, and now you're throwing the mix.
You got all those sort ofmulti-res buildings that they
got bloody restaurants on top ofthem and all sorts of things
going on well, that's.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Yeah.
I was actually on one of themrecently, looked down on it and
I saw what he created and I waspretty proud of that and thought
, well, you know, if I couldaspire to be like him as forward
thinking, well, yeah, great.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah, awesome mate.
And then.
So how did you go from workingfor a development company to so?
Speaker 1 (03:39):
I was a child of Sorry, I went through I think it
was the 90s recession, um, theone that we didn't have to have.
So basically his business wentelsewhere around australia, um.
And back in those daysapprentices couldn't go work in
a state, they had to stay in intheir state.
So I had to find I think I wasmy third year I had to find work
(04:01):
.
So then I actually hooked upwith a builder who worked in the
same company.
He got retrenched and then Igot into domestic construction
that way and then from there Ifound my way into high-end
construction, and that cameabout because I rang, I wanted
to get my builder's license butyou had to do your two-year
(04:23):
supervision and I heard of abuilder called Wally Williams
back in those days who wanted asupervisor, and I put my hand up
.
He took me on and Wally used tobe one of the big builders in
town that built the high-endstuff.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
He was one of the best mate.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
Look I've never met the guy, but when?
Speaker 2 (04:41):
I was during my time and when I started subbing, like
his name would come upeverywhere.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I got my start with himand I thank him for that, and
that's where I really developedmy passion for that kind of work
, and I'm still doing it today.
I've been into other sectors ofconstruction which I found out,
which we're going to get tolater on.
That's not for me, and I'veended up finding my way back
(05:11):
into my own business doing thatsort of thing for clients who
want that kind of or caliber ofhome.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
Yeah, you do nice work.
The um, I kind of met you atone of your jobs at milton.
Yeah, whatever, a few monthsago the um, like the backyard on
that place, like the detail,like bloody hanging columns and
suspended steel work andoff-form concrete around it all
like it's pretty pretty full-onyeah, it is my kind of work's
not, it's not something you rush.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Uh, clients say to me when you're going to be
finished.
I'll say to them look, I don'tknow, it'll be finished when I.
When I'm finished, um, I'llgive them an indication, um, but
it's very detailed, like thatparticular one, we had off-form
concrete seats that wereactually a footing on ground
that you sat on, and the wholehouse is propped up by suspended
suspended posts, sidecantilevering posts.
(05:57):
Yeah to.
To work out how to do that tookme days, days and days yeah, no
, it was super impressive, mate.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
as soon as you walked down the side of that house and
around to that backyard youwere still building it while I
was there I was like holy shit,this is pretty serious.
Like you turn over to the frontof that place and it just
looked like a bit of an oldcottage and yeah, you get around
the back of it like holy shit,there's some work going on here.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
It is my passion.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
And I find here it is my passion, um, and I find it
very rewarding.
Now, yeah, I'm saying now so,but you, so you've recently
taken the leap to to getcranking on your own stuff.
Yeah, um, what, what'sencouraged that like I needed a
career change, but it wasn't a?
Speaker 1 (06:40):
career change.
But it wasn't a career changefrom changing what I do.
I needed to change directionwith what I do.
So I learned a lot from WallyWilliams' days and then from him
I went on and worked foranother guy that worked for
Wally as well.
He does the same kind of work.
I finished with RamConstructions.
(07:04):
I was like, well, well, I thinkI've had enough of this, this
kind of work.
I want to go and look at thecommercial stuff, which I did.
I actually got poached by oneof the big players in town, tier
I think they're tier two ortier three builder, I won't say
who they are.
Um, I got poached to build oneof their big clients houses in
ashgrove.
Coached to build one of theirbig clients' houses in Ashgrove.
(07:26):
So I don't know.
If you know Ashgrove, it'spretty well built on granite.
The job site the site was 600square metres, average slope 30
degrees, and the project managerthat I was reporting to missed
a line in the soil report thatsaid non-excavatable rock, 300
down.
(07:46):
And it was the first thing Iread when I started on day one.
What are we doing here?
He said, oh, you'll be done intwo weeks, 12 months, and one
week later I poured the blindinglayer for the slab oh, sorry
for the lift slab.
Yeah, um, and the pressure whenyou're in that space in
commercial, you know you've gotto reach your targets.
(08:08):
They want you to perform, youneed to have your slab down by
this date.
And I started to build thatpressure.
In the end I just went to themsaid, look, I I don't know when
I'm going to have thisexcavation finished.
And dead set took us 12 monthsso what?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
just on rock sores, it was pure granite 300 mpa rock
it always amazed me in thosesituations because you would
think from the soil tests, thatthe engineer and the architect
would have designed the housearound that.
Because, yeah, when you'retrying to excavate that sort of
ground and that quantity ofground, like it's just, it feels
(08:47):
like you're just throwing moneydown the drain yeah, you can't,
you can't excavate it, so wehad to.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
We ended up, the civil contractor and I put their
hands up and said we can'tbreak it, so the deal's off.
So look, the whole thing wasdone.
So their client was a majordeveloper, industrial developer,
and obviously they got us tobuild their house.
I don't know what deals werebeing done there, but I was just
told keep going yeah don'tworry about your schedule, we'll
(09:14):
worry about that when you startto build.
So, yeah, we, we got throughthat stage.
Um, I reckon it cost themnearly seven or eight hundred
thousand.
This is back in 2016, yeah, sowhat it would be now I don't
know.
Um, so as soon as I start tobuild, yeah, the pressure was on
and tight site, split level,road, power lines everywhere.
(09:37):
So, logistical nightmareeverything had to be craned in
by um small crane.
We couldn't have slew cranesbecause you just too much stuff
around.
Yeah, um, and they were superhigh end on their safety.
So I had to do all the safetyevery day.
And, yeah, you just had allthis pressure all the time.
And if you didn't do it, whyhaven't you done this?
(09:58):
And you know it all built up.
Yeah, anyway, six months later,I go to pour the top floor slab.
So it's a four-story house, topfloor is concrete and I'm about
five meters out from the lastsupport point in a suspended
slab and, mind you, we're 12meters in the air.
And, oh, that's right.
The, the enclave that we're in,had a 200 a 20 ton weight
(10:22):
limited bridge to get in.
That was the only way in, theonly way out, so I had to factor
all my concrete trucks as tohow much concrete was in them.
And it was a late pour.
We didn't start pouring thatuntil about 9 30 in the
afternoon, so I had time againstme to get it in.
So it occurred it was winter aswell.
So I had it all stacked upanyway.
(10:43):
And the concrete, the pump,starts breaking down and we're
five metres out from the lastsupport point.
We've got another five to goand, as you know, concrete's
only got a two-hour life.
It starts to go off and I'vegot trucks down the street
because the pump's broken downand I think I waved through two
trucks.
So what's that?
(11:03):
$1,800 with the concrete, yeah,and we're still nowhere near
the support point and I'veprobably got 15 or 20 minutes to
go before she's buggered andwe've got to stop.
And, thank God, the pumpstarted again and we're away
again.
And I remember the end of thatday, all the management coming
(11:24):
out to me and saying whathappened?
Why did this happen?
Why didn't you think of this?
And I just felt this massiveweight.
Anyway, that was the first timeI went home one night and I had
the shakes and I thought thisis pretty hectic.
Yeah, anyway, I got throughthat.
We finished that project.
There was a lot of incidenceshappened in that house, so that
(11:49):
didn't really rock my boat or Igot away from them.
I didn't hurt me too much.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
But the next really bad anxiety attack I got so at
this point in time, like becausethis is all part of your story
and your journey, but at thispoint in time you didn't know
that you're dealing with anxiety.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
No, I knew I was a pretty nervy person.
I used to worry a lot aboutthings.
People used to say you worrytoo much.
But in my mind I was goingthrough the scenarios.
I actually used to tell myselfbe prepared for the worst,
because then I'll have control.
And that's apparently a verytypical anxiety sufferer
mentality.
Be prepared for that worst incase scenario, so you know what
(12:32):
to do yeah um, yeah.
So then I decided I didn'treally want to work in that
environment because they wouldjust put too much pressure on
you and I'm not built for that.
And I realized that, uh.
So then I ended up going andworking for another company who
did multi-res, and my first job,um, was a bunch of townhouses,
(12:56):
12 townhouses.
I had to build them in 10months and, like I'm the only
guy it's just me and our crew ofchippies, young chippies um, I
got the job done, but you can'tbuild that quick, that well,
yeah, and every day I'd beworried about what I hadn't done
or what I hadn't controlled, orwhat mistakes have been made
(13:17):
and who'd done what you know.
So I'd lie in bed and I think,oh crap, I haven't organized
that.
I got that coming tomorrow andI've got concrete booked for the
next day and I haven't orderedsteel.
There's all that stuff in theair.
It's just too much.
Yeah, too much.
But me I'd go.
No, I'll take this challenge on, I'm going to do it.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
It's a lot for.
So what were you?
Were you a project manager?
Speaker 1 (13:46):
I project manager.
I was project manager, yeah, Iwas project manager and foreman
and head of safety on a 12million dollar bill.
Yeah, it was nuts.
Yeah, but me I'd take it all on.
So, yeah, no, I don't wantanyone to judge me and say, oh,
he can't do the job, because Ithink in industry too, there's a
lot of ego definitely a lot ofego and that ego becomes
competitive.
And if, if you, I felt, if Icouldn't do it, I was being
(14:10):
judged, and if I'm being judged,then that led to failure for me
.
Um, but I didn't know this atthe time.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
I'm just plugging along, just satisfying the
people that I had to answer tothere's a lot of pressure in
that, that space in there, likewith um, the bigger builders and
project managers and stuff likethey get a lot of weight on
their shoulders well, it comesfrom the top.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
So the developer puts the pressure on the builder.
Developer's got his own set ofpressures so he just pushes that
downhill.
That goes to the company owner.
Then the company owner justkeeps funneling it down and the
guy on the job he's the one thatcollects.
I reckon the site manager andthe site foreman on those jobs
has got the harvest job oh,definitely, definitely yeah, I
know because I've been there.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Yeah, I used to see it when I um, when I finished my
time and went out subbing andlike we'll work for a lot of
those big developer builders anddoing lots of tilt up
commercial sort of developments.
We did a lot of large unitdevelopment blocks and like
multi-rise up to sort of fiveand six stories and like I was
(15:16):
under pressure taking on all thecarpentry work on the jobs.
But you would see, like thosejobs generally had a side office
and like the, the sitesupervisor and the construction
manager, like they'd be thefirst ones there they'd be,
they'd be there till late mostnights and like all day, every
day, all you saw was them on thephone arguing with people,
(15:36):
putting putting more pressure onon everyone else on site, like
it was just a mess well, I cansay to you honestly, I did 55
incoming phone calls in an hourand those were the ones that I
answered yeah so the phone wasjust constantly ringing,
constantly beeping, and I hadmessages after that.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
Yeah, that was just the typical morning around about
eight, between sort of seveno'clock to ten o'clock.
That was a typical day yeah andthen you got to breathe it
because they all had smoke.
Oh, and then you get to go toyour office in the afternoon.
Put your head between you.
What's next?
Yeah, yeah so then where did it?
go from, so from after then thenext big, the one that really
(16:17):
rocked my boat and I realized Iwell, I actually didn't realize
I had a problem, but it reallyrocked me was I did another
block of units so I went fromthat job, did a couple little
jobs for that guy.
Then I had a big block of unitsin brisbane and it was an
unlevel site so I had to build atwo and a half meter wall down
the back and then we had tobackfill it, bring it up two and
(16:39):
a half to nothing at the front.
It's a small cut at the front.
And I remember during thedesign and quoting stage we
quoted the backfill and ourclient came along and said no, I
don't want to pay that, that'stoo much.
The engineering was all spessedout.
It all said that we had to have200 kpa compaction.
(16:59):
Um, I learned a lot with thisone, so I won't go, I'll just
move on with this.
Anyway.
He, um, he took over that startpart of contract and found a
cheaper guy and I actually saidin the pre-start meeting I don't
want to be on site when he doesit.
Um, and then someone else saidno, as a builder we have to have
(17:19):
a presence, you need to bethere.
So this guy brought starts tobackfill.
We did a pre-start program withhim.
He said oh yeah, I'll take acouple days, I'm going okay,
something like this probablyneeds five or six days because
if you know you've got to do itin layers, yeah, it's got to be
sprayed, rolled, tested, sprayed, rolled till you get up.
This guy did it in a day, likeit was, I think, 70 trucks uh,
(17:44):
came in, dumped and go and thenthe roller would just roll it in
.
The water truck broke down andI'm going this ain't good, this
isn't good.
Where's your water truck?
Where's your geo tester?
Where's this?
And I was literally told tofuck off, get off site.
You don't know what you'redoing.
And I said well, I'm not, I'mhere to supervise you.
I sent an email saying this iswrong.
(18:05):
That went out.
Anyway, the other thing wasyou'll get your compaction
certificate at the end, whichthey gave me a compaction
certificate, but it was toiletpaper really.
Who did it?
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Well, I don't know names, but did they get a
company in too?
Speaker 1 (18:21):
They had it.
Well, it turns out that thecivil company were dodgy.
They went bankrupt not longafterwards, run by a young biker
I don't think he was, I thinkhe was 27.
It was his business, and thegeotech company stitched up with
him were also being chased byother geocompanies because they
were doing the wrong thing.
Yeah, that all happened behindme.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Yeah, but that's another perfect example.
But like I bang on about allthe time in this industry you
have to have experience.
You can't just do a few jobsand then think that you can do
everything well, see again, herecomes the arrogance in it and
the and the ego.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
So I was told, don't worry about it, it's fine.
But I knew in my heart, no,it's not.
My gut feeling was like no,this isn't right.
And I made a bit of noise, butnot enough.
And now I know, when I feelthat strongly about something,
make a heap of noise.
Yeah.
Anyway, yeah, we got it done.
(19:21):
We started to build.
I started putting in the padfootings for all the columns.
Like the pad footings werethree meters square, 800 deep,
um strip footings were 600 by600, and I did that.
I was on.
I set myself a target to get itall in before the wet season
hit.
And sure enough it hit.
It hit hard and all that.
That's right.
(19:42):
We put footings in and putwalls up, so basement walls, and
then we got rain and then Ibrought in the civil guys to
start doing the drainage.
Different contractor and heopens the ground up to put his
pipes and his stormwater and hiswater oozing out of the ground
and I'm looking at it going,this isn't good, but still
(20:04):
didn't say I told my superiorsand said oh, you'll be right,
keep going.
We filled it in, cleaned thejob up.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
So what was your?
Because I think this sort oftalking about this stuff on the
podcast will be educating a lotof people.
Explain why you were worriedthat water was oozing out of the
ground.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Because it meant the ground wasn't hard enough.
Yeah, yeah, it hadn't compactedit enough and it was like a
sponge just sucked it in yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
So for those that haven't done a lot of this type
of work like that, the wholeidea of putting it in in layers,
like most engineers will uh andlook, I'm definitely no expert,
you need to talk to yourengineers about this.
But um, you might agree, rob,like most engineers generally
will state in their paperwork,or they'll come to site, you
might do a pre-start on thesetypes of jobs and they'll tell
you a process, and generallythat process will be like
(20:52):
pushing the soil out with a drotor some sort of machine in in
100 to 200 mil layers, yep, acertain amount of times rolled
over with a sheep's foot rollerwater on top of it and then just
keep going in layers and theytest it.
They test each layer and they'vegot to get their compaction at
that layer so then, they knowthey've got solid compaction all
the way to the top yeah, and if, if you get compaction like the
(21:15):
heart of the ground, the lesswater it absorbs.
So like that's that, yeah, likethe and this is the thing, like
people in the industry don'tknow and like obviously those
other contractors didn't know,like when you've seen the water
oozing out of the ground, likethat's just a sign of shit work.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
Yep, it is, mind you, my pressure's, my anxiety's
building when I'm seeing this.
And I had a really good machineoperator that kept telling me
daily, rob, there's somethingwrong with this ground.
But in back of my head I hadmore voices you'll be right,
(21:53):
keep going.
And I had the completion dateof that job because my client
was saying I got buyers whobought to want to move in.
Right, so that's coming in onyou.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
So this isn't just to go back.
This isn't your job.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
No, no, I'm running it, so I'm working for a guy
here, Anyway, and then we moveon and we clean the job up and
I'm still sus.
I'm walking out the job.
This is where it really hits.
And I look down my job and Ilook down all my perp lines and
my block work and the back ofthe job is dropping.
I could see it dropping off andI know my block lay was not bad
(22:24):
, not that bad.
So I went home that night andI'm edgy, like I feel this sort
of nervousness which everyonegets.
But then I went back the nextday with my laser level and I
checked every footing down theback and she's 25 mil lower than
everything else, and I don'tmake 25 mil mistakes like that
and then I felt this wave ofjust sheer anxiety go through my
(22:49):
body.
My legs went weak.
I had to sit down.
I felt sick because I knew whatwas going on.
I knew she was sinking and I'mlike, oh crap, what do I do?
I think I took and this is inthe morning and I've probably
got 20 guys on site block, blocklayers, civil guys, just
tradies, and they're all comingat me.
(23:09):
What do you want to have in?
I'm trying to deal with thatand this, yeah.
So then I eventually got myselftogether and I rang my boss and
I said look, I need a meetingthis afternoon with you and the
construction manager.
Oh, yeah, sure, what's wrong?
I've got a problem.
Oh, it'll be right, come on in.
So that night I went in.
We say, I said boys, we've gota problem.
I've got footings at a 25 millower than they were four weeks
(23:32):
ago when I put them in.
Okay, how do we fix it?
We'll just, we'll attachanother footing to it, put a
pier down, attach a footing toit, be right.
So we rang the engineer, toldthem they come to site a couple
days later and they're lookingat us.
They're all gray, so they'vegot a problem.
It's a gentleman.
We can't fix this easily.
To do this fix, we've got todig under every footing and put
(23:57):
more concrete down to where weget 200 kpa in ground compaction
, which was natural, which wasabout 200 below where I started
four months ago yeah some of theholes were nearly three meters
deep under the footing, yeah.
So we had to prop everything upand then pour concrete in up to
the underside of the footing andyou had to vibrate in such a
(24:18):
way that the concrete camearound.
So you knew you were completelylike, supported yeah, and it
took six months and cost 200k.
Holy shit, yeah.
And I'm like, oh, my god, am Igoing to send everyone broke?
Oh, it all went to court.
I didn't go to court, it wentlaw legal.
So both parties were goinglegal, you know, getting legal
advice, and all the legal legalspointed to me and said he's the
(24:43):
problem.
He allowed concrete to bepoured, yeah, when in actual
fact, I didn't want to pour it,but I got told to pour it yeah,
shit, mate.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
How's that buddy go down?
Speaker 1 (24:53):
um, yeah, that's what really destroyed me.
That's when I real, that's whenI really had anxiety.
I didn't I every night, I justcouldn't sleep.
I um, I didn't want to go towork, I still got.
I finished the building, I got,I got help too.
I went.
At that point I went to aneighbor, that's right.
My neighbor was a psych nurseand I went down to him and said
(25:17):
Trevor, I think I'm having aheart attack.
And he said well, what's wrong?
I said I can't breathe and I'vegot pain in my, in my heart.
I thought I had it's actuallyassociated pain.
And he said you're having amental breakdown, an anxiety
attack, sorry.
And I said, oh, that wouldexplain why I'm not sleeping.
(25:38):
He goes yeah, yeah, somethingmay just happen.
What is it?
And I told him he said, yeah,you're gonna have to go and get
help with that because you can'tfix it.
Yeah, and that's when Irealized, okay, well, I'll go
and get help.
So I did.
I went and saw a psychiatristand they said, yeah, that major
(25:59):
event has caused this to happen.
We don't want to do medicationbecause I don't believe in it.
Um, we'll just fix it.
We went through all thecognitive exercises and stuff
and it worked for a little while.
I tried some tablets, but theywere terrible.
They just couldn't function.
So I went natural and I triedto just get through that level
(26:19):
of doubt that I had in my mind.
I'd tell myself, no, I'm I'mgood at what I do, but then egos
would kick in and bash you backdown again, like external egos.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
Um, and the whole time too, I hid this from my
wife but I'm just sitting herelike um, I take my hat off to
you like.
This is a lot to share yeah, soI reckon there'd be a lot of
people in our industry that areprobably going through what
you're talking about right nowwell, this is why I wanted to do
this.
Speaker 1 (26:46):
So if I can just reach out to one person on this
podcast and they hear my storyand assimilate and go, well, he
fit, he beat it, so can I.
But yeah, I don't know how manynights I lay on that couch at
night couldn't sleep, I didn'twant to wake my wife.
I'd go and sit on the couch andI'd be shaking and I just
couldn't sleep.
And every night I'd say Ididn't want to wake my wife.
I'd go and sit on the couch andI'd be shaking and I just
(27:07):
couldn't sleep.
And every night I'd say I'mgoing to get up and I'm going to
work, I'm going to fix myproblems, but I just it's like a
brick wall is in front of youcannot get off that couch and
move, to go and do somethingelse.
It just you can't do it.
People say we used to say to mewhy don't you get up and go and
do some work?
You just can't do it.
It's a mental thing.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
So what's happening?
What's going on in your head?
Are you watching telly?
Speaker 1 (27:33):
No, just sitting in the dark, couldn't turn TV on.
I'd turn it on and it wouldjust start negative thoughts
racing.
I could be watching Days of OurLives and I'd already start.
I'd go back to the job thinkingwhy did I, why didn't I argue
more that day?
And, holy crap, have I madethat thing wrong?
(27:54):
You start to doubt yourself.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
Question other work you have built.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
What's going to go wrong next?
You know what haven't I coveredproperly?
What's going to fall down?
And nothing's ever fallen downfor me, nothing.
We fixed that job.
Like that job.
I still drive past it.
It's five years, six years oldnow and there's not one crack in
it.
You know it's done.
Developer made good money outof it and we all moved on.
(28:20):
And that's the thing withanxiety you get really down and
out about the bad stuff.
You don't look back at what thegood stuff is.
So I keep going with the.
I hid this from my wife for fiveyears and it actually caused a
bit of trouble.
And I've got to say my wiferealised that there was a
(28:45):
problem with with me.
Um, she's one of these peoplethat doesn't understand mental
health, but she does now.
Um, she realized that, like Ithink.
I questioned her and I said,look, I'm not well, there's
something wrong.
I need you to help me.
So yeah, she did.
She said we'll go and get help.
So that's when I realized, well, I really need to fix this, um,
(29:11):
and I went and got more help.
This is years later because yougot kids as well, yeah I got
three daughters and here's theweird thing about it my eldest
had anxiety problems because shetransitioned from primary
school to high school by herselfand I'd have to pick her up in
the mornings.
Get her out of bed, honey, it'sgoing to be all right.
(29:32):
Face your fears and go toschool.
It'll be all right when you getthere.
And just last week, when I wasthinking about this podcast, I
realized hang on a minute.
That's exactly what I had to doto get out of it was face my
fears and just get myself towork, because I did that for
five years.
I put myself off that couch.
(29:53):
Go and have a shower, have acup of tea, get in that truck,
drive to the job.
As soon as I opened the gateand the boys started to walk in,
the fears would go go.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Yeah, so how are you functioning, mate, if you're?
Up all night just sitting thereI don't know.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
So another telling point was I woke up one morning.
I had to do a Bunnings run andI woke up in the middle of the
intersection with my foot on thebrake, because I was only
getting two hours sleep a nightand had been like that for a
couple of years, on and off.
And that's when, when, yeah, mywife and I decided it was
pretty serious.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
We've got to fix this .
So sorry, just go back to you.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
You went to bunnings and you fell asleep in an
intersection so I was at the endof a job and you know so I
could have a job.
You're constantly on thehardware store picking up stuff.
Actually, I think that day Ineeded a break.
I need to get off the job.
So, boys, I'm going to go toBunnings and pick up the stuff
we need for this job over hereand I literally sitting at the
lights in the turn right laneindicator on and then next thing
(30:54):
, you know, I wake up in themiddle of the intersection,
slowly creeping forward, so I'dprobably moved 20 metres.
It's a major intersection inBrisbane too.
No one had tooted me oranything, and then holy shit,
that's pretty serious.
There's other ones like that.
There's Ricketts Road Bridgedown in the bay in the Redlands.
It's probably I don't know 150metres long.
(31:17):
I've crossed that a couple oftimes, Don't remember it, Just
had a nano nap, yeah.
So anxiety in that condition isdangerous, and the sooner I
realised I had something wrongthe better.
And I think to talk about whatI did to get out of it.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
Have you spoken about ?
Speaker 1 (31:39):
this before.
No, no.
This is why I wanted to do this.
I haven't spoken publicly aboutit.
I've spoken to my family, mygirls, my daughters.
I've told them because they allsaw the issues that I had.
I told them when I realisedthat I had a problem.
It's like it's exactly the sameas being an alcoholic.
(32:01):
It's like it's exactly the sameas being an alcoholic.
If you admit that you're analcoholic, you know, then you've
got it.
You know what you've got to doto fix it.
So I admitted that I sufferanxiety.
So I decided to just ignore thearrogance in the industry and
that whole beef.
I'll get over it.
So I tell people now withstrong personalities hang on,
(32:23):
back off.
I actually suffer anxiety.
You're giving it to me.
I need five minutes, um, andyou'd be surprised if I'm if
being straight up and in theirface about it.
They back off.
Yeah, because I know that I cando what they want me to do.
Yeah, but I just need time toprocess it yeah, mate, that's
(32:46):
like, this is that's huge.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Like yeah, good on you.
Like um, so what was the hell?
Like where did you go to dealwith this?
Like is it?
Speaker 1 (32:55):
um, I just I started out well.
The first thing I had to do is,yeah, admit it, just
acknowledge it.
So, yeah, I'm not, I've gotsuffering anxiety, right.
Then I went to my GP, told himabout it he actually had
experience with it himself, myGP and he then put me on the
right steps to fix it.
(33:16):
So we went and got apsychiatrist this time it was a
lady who I wasn't really.
I don't want to be sexist aboutthis at all, but you want
blokes?
Want to go see women?
Uh, blokes about this stuff?
No, the ladies, I think, areprobably more across it than the
boys are the men doctors I'vebeen to a couple of male doctors
didn't like them.
(33:38):
So that process of gettingpsychological help you've
actually got to feel comfortablewith that, with your therapist,
you've got to actually feel aconnection.
Yeah, um, and I found this ladyand she started to step me
through it and I think I'd seenthree psychiatrists my third by
the stage, over 10 years and sheactually said to me I think it
(34:01):
was last session, rob, you'renever, ever going to get rid of
this, you're always going tohave it.
What you need to do is get itunder control.
And I thought you know whatthat makes sense?
Yeah, because I'd talked to herabout changing careers and that
sort of stuff.
She said don't change careersbecause it's going to come back
in the next one.
You just need to get it undercontrol.
(34:29):
So then I went on a rampage ofgoogle what is it?
What is it?
And I found it.
I'm normal.
I'm like everybody else outthere most people who suffer it,
uh, either very highfunctioning, they're
perfectionists and they thinkabout the worst case scenario
instead of the best.
So then I started to change mymentality.
I did get medication, so I'm ona very low dose drug that helps
(34:51):
me sleep.
So my brain?
When I wake up with a panicattack, everything kicks in.
All the chemicals kick in, thebrain fires up.
That's what was stopping mefrom sleeping.
They're giving me a mask, adrug that helps me sleep.
Yeah, it doesn't stop theanxiety, it just helps me sleep.
It's not a drug that you knocksyou out.
Speaker 2 (35:12):
I don't know how it works, it just controls the
chemical in my mind you weresaying before we started talking
about it, because so rob and Ihave had a few chats over the
last couple of months and whenRob started telling me about
this a couple of weeks ago, Iwas like man, like, if you're
comfortable, I'd love to get youon the podcast and share this,
because a lot of people on thepodcast, including myself, have
(35:36):
spoken about anxiety, but not inthis sort of detail.
So I definitely admire you fortelling me your story, but you
were saying that one of thehardest parts is like 50 of
people know about it, 50 ofpeople don't.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
yeah, say in my I don't know what the real numbers
are, but in for me to level itin my head, 50 of people
understand anxieties, have gotit, and the other 50% of people
don't.
Those people to me now are veryobvious.
I know them straight away byshaking their hand or talking to
them.
They're usually highlymotivated people.
(36:16):
Some of them, a lot of them,are bosses and they don't really
have the space to understand it.
And that's what I think themodern world now needs to do is
educate that person.
Hey, this is actually an illness.
We know a lot more about it.
It's not going to go away.
You need to accept that some ofyour staff, your friends, your
(36:39):
family have it and learn aboutit so you can support them.
Because I mean me, hiding itfrom my wife was probably the
worst thing I could have done.
We would have fixed this yearsago.
If we'd have had that row backthen I wouldn't have gone
through what I've gone through.
But I guess I've gone throughwhat I've gone through to learn
(37:00):
about it and then hopefully sithere and tell someone else to
realise they have anxiety andthen go and here and tell
someone else to realize theyhave anxiety and then go and get
it fixed because um it's likeit affects your whole family
life, doesn't it?
yeah, I wasn't present.
Yeah, yeah, I'd be.
Yeah, when I was in a badattack, some of my attacks would
(37:21):
go for weeks, some months.
Yeah, yeah, I was justconstantly on edge.
I wouldn't sleep for five orsix weeks, probably two, three
hours a night.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Weeks and weeks and weeks on end and was it always
to do with work?
Like something that washappening at work always work,
always work.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
And then work was fear of failure, which then
leads to off and judgment, whichthen I thought, oh, I'm gonna
lose my job, you know, because Iobviously I'm showing to these
people I can't do it, they'regonna get rid of me and get
someone else.
They, they can do it.
But I've since learned there'sno one out there.
Speaker 2 (37:58):
That's like that but you, um yeah, like I'm just
thinking about everything you'resaying and then thinking about
my like what?
I think I've got anxiety andI've got a lot of the signs that
you are talking about like I'mthe worst I'm the worst fucking
sleeper ever, and what you justsaid is exactly why I don't
sleep like I wake up and, likeyou said, everything just turns
(38:20):
on and I'm wide awake and I'mthinking and my uh, I think
about failure all the time whenI do posts on socials and that
sometimes I talk about I've gotto fight my demons.
That's what I'm talking aboutit is your demons.
I feel like there's someonesitting on my shoulder.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
You've got a name for yours.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
I do now Bob.
Speaker 1 (38:40):
Yeah, yeah, I actually took that.
I should name mine, but mine'spretty quiet now.
Yeah, I actually took that as a.
Yeah, I should name mine, butmine's pretty quiet now.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Yeah, but I definitely feel there's going to
be a lot of people listening tothis podcast that are sitting
there listening and thinking,fuck, this is what I'm going
through, this is what I'mdealing with.
But I'm actually sitting herethinking, too, about some of my
team members and thinking like,this is them, this is what
they're doing.
Speaker 1 (39:10):
Yeah, bashing themselves up?
Yeah, because they don't wantto disappoint.
They don't want to disappointyou, but they won't.
Um, they probably, theyprobably would, because they get
themselves so wound up.
Um, because this is what washappening to me.
I'd'd get so wound up and sotired I wouldn't stop and think
about a major decision and thenlater a problem would come out
(39:33):
and I'd just go oh, that'sbecause I rushed it that day.
I didn't stop because I'm tired.
Do you know what I mean?
So we get so wound up with whatwe do, trying to trying to get
to the end of the day or amilestone or something on a job
site, um, and we forget to takea breath, stop and look at what
(39:56):
we're doing before we jump intoit.
So I do.
I'm, I'm bad at it, yeah, um,but I'm.
I'm getting on top of that now,where I take a deep breath,
three deep breaths, and then Ithink about what I'm doing
before I commit to it, and ninetimes out of ten that three deep
breaths, I'll realize I'veforgotten something.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Yeah, I can't remember where I picked it up
from, but something that I'vedone for a while now, for a few
years and I definitely thinkit's helped with my anxiety is I
realized that to to moveforward with anything, you've
got to slow down slow down tospeed up.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
Yeah, ask my boys, you ask leon.
Yeah, I say that to my guysevery day slow down to speed up,
fellas yeah and like so I applythat to everything in my life.
Speaker 2 (40:41):
So, uh, it can be whether camille and I are
thinking about doing adevelopment or an investment, or
even if we're doing somethingat home with the girls, or like
I definitely do it on site, likeI tell the boys all the time
like don't just rush into it,take 10 minutes in the morning,
have a thing about what you gotto do, slow down and then move
forward, and I think that makes,if you apply that to everything
(41:04):
in your life, it it does make abig difference.
And that was one of my biggestproblems was I was just always
flat out, and I think my beingflat out was my way of, I guess,
trying to push it to the side.
Maybe.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
Yeah, that's exactly what it is.
Yeah, you go fast, it's like aboat.
You're going fast, you'repushing everything to the.
It's like a boat.
You're going fast.
You're pushing everything tothe side to get to the, get to
where you're going to, and thenyou deal with what's behind you
later.
But, in actual fact, if you slow, I find, if you slow down
here's another one of myanalogies I use.
Some people like to race up toa gate and smash it over and
(41:42):
walk through it, and then theteam behind them fixes it.
Or you can go up to the gate,open it, walk through and close
it with no damage.
Yeah, yeah, that one works aswell.
That's a country one, that's mycountry boy coming out, but, um
, for me to fix it, that'sprobably that's the next step
(42:02):
that I had to do.
So I had to fix the problem, ifI can talk about that.
Yeah.
So step one was to realize,yeah, I have an issue and I'm
not sleeping, I'm not healthy,and I need to fix that.
So then I went down the Googletrap and started to research
what was wrong and what anxietyis, and the psychiatrist's
(42:25):
feedback as well, and it allcome down to me focusing on the
negative and the what-ifs, thebad what-ifs.
So I turn that around prettyquick.
I um, I walk as much as I cannow in the mornings I wake up.
I just if it's pitch black atthe moment, I just walk the dog
to the park which is at the endof the street, and back, and I
actually have a cup of tea in myhand and think about all the
(42:47):
good things that are going tohappen today.
If something's on my mind whenI wake up, I've got this saying
I'm going to go get in front ofit.
That came from a show onNetflix Ozark.
Yeah, I don't know if you knowthat.
No, that show was about.
It was Jason Bateman.
He was a criminal organizationsaccountant and he was in charge
(43:08):
of the money laundering.
So he had a lot of pressure,that guy.
He started just saying I've gotto get in front of this.
And I did the same thing.
If something's worrying me orI'm getting anxious from it, I
actually go for it.
I go for it.
I get in front of it to findout what is the problem here.
(43:29):
Why am I anxious?
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Yeah, so is that like it's your routine?
So has routine helped you dealwith this?
Speaker 1 (43:38):
Yes, so every day now I get up and have a cup of tea.
It depends.
Some days I don't always walkto the park, but I'll always sit
with the dog.
It'll either be out the back inthe garden or I'll go for a
walk with her and I'll thinkabout what's on my mind and what
I'm doing today.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
Yeah, yeah, and that helps settle the nerves yeah and
prepare you for what you'regoing to get up to.
Yeah, the um mate, I think,yeah, I definitely think it's in
.
It's incredible that you cansit here.
And yeah, I definitely thinkit's incredible that you can sit
here and talk openly about it,because it's going to help
people like guarantee it, Iguess, for anyone that's
listening to the podcast orwatching the podcast and thinks
(44:15):
that you may have anxiety orsomething going on like, I guess
, reach out, I'm sure you canreach out to Rob and have a chat
.
Or, as you know, we're bigsupporters of the TX boys.
Give, give the TX hotline acall if you need to.
But, um, a lot of people in ourindustry have this say yeah,
like it's.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
I see it every day, yeah all right and I, when I was
in my worst, I said I washelping my kids, I was helping
blokes on site having breakdowns.
I'd have to go up and give thema hug and say, yeah, okay, mate
, you know, like, take a breath.
You know, go and go and grab adrink of water or go and sit in
my shed for five minutes.
I'll come and have a chat toyou.
And I've talked them through it.
And it's amazing too.
(44:55):
The other thing too is don't beafraid to talk about it.
So this whole perception thatyou know you got anxiety or
you're weak, you're not, not,you're not, you're normal, and I
started to talk about it toowith people.
People I would never haveexpected to suffer it.
I'd tell them, yeah, I'm just abit anxious or I've got, maybe,
(45:16):
a panic attack.
I'd tell them that I wasn'tcomfortable and they'd start to
talk to me about them and whatthey do to get through it.
So I mentioned medication before, say, um, a gentleman that I
worked with I still do very,very, very successful
(45:36):
businessman uh, I found out hehad chronic, uh, depression and
anxiety.
I never had the depression, buthe then said how he beat it?
Uh, he ended up being a gymjunkie, gotta do.
He's a crossfit maniac, yeah,so he'd go and do crossfit in
the mornings and then he'd goand do his business thing during
the day like big business.
(45:58):
Yeah, like what he does ispretty crazy.
Um, and he said as for thesleeping, you got to try this.
It it won't knock you out, itjust helps you go to sleep,
releases the sleep chemical inyour brain and off you go and
you wake up the next day freshand it does it's I'll have to
get some of that off you mateI'll let you know what it is.
It's fully legal, um.
But yeah, talking to otherpeople, don't be afraid to to
(46:21):
bring it up, you know yeah youdon't?
Some people just go oh yeah,and that's the 50% that don't
want to know about it or don'tunderstand it.
But the other 50 that do,they'll start talking to you.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
And talking is everything.
Isn't it Like?
People need to talk more.
Speaker 1 (46:36):
It is You've got to talk.
Speaker 2 (46:37):
Yeah, Like you say it's hard, Like it's a bloke.
Do you think it's a blokeything?
Speaker 1 (46:43):
Blokes are worse.
Women talk stuff through.
They just do so, men.
I think it's changing, dwayne.
I think it's changing becausewe know more about it.
Boys are starting to say, yeah,okay, maybe I do have a problem
.
I honestly do think it alsostems to domestic violence,
because blokes don't know how toreact with it.
(47:05):
They're probably sleep deprived, they're worried about their
jobs.
So then that aggression iscoming out at home, you know, or
in their personal lives.
So I think people need to lookat that.
It didn't with me, but I knowother people, other blokes I
know, that had issues on site.
I question their homerelationships, yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
So yeah, I, I can see that, yeah, through some of the
people on site, like, I think,because we've got to sleep well,
that was.
Speaker 1 (47:36):
That's a big thing.
Sleep so as soon as you.
I get six hours a night now,which is enough for me, yeah,
but without that you can'tfunction.
Speaker 2 (47:43):
Yeah, just can't yeah , and I think it's important,
like what you said, you've gotto find a way to deal with.
Deal with it like um, becauseif you're not dealing with these
things and it does build up andwho knows where it can end up
get in front of it.
You don't want to be um fallingasleep in a major intersection,
that's for sure yeah, that was.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
Um, yeah, that was interesting that day.
That was, yeah, that actuallydid frighten me that day because
it was the day that I'd I thinkI'd I'd had a bad.
I was having a bad time on ajob site.
I was on top of the job, that'sright.
I remember now it was a fewyears ago I was on a project
(48:23):
that just won a bucket load ofawards and we were hit with all
that rain.
Remember we got a lot of rainand I had ground open everywhere
.
Speaker 2 (48:32):
Don't tell me about rain.
It's been fucking raining foreight months now.
Speaker 1 (48:35):
Another footings and rain story.
I was doing a job in one of thecanal estates and the whole
house is propped up byscrewpeers.
Thank God All this rain cameand the whole embankment started
to go and we actually hadexposed groupies, clients
freaking out hey, it's gonnafall over.
I can't mate.
(48:55):
You got 130, 140 screw peersunder your house.
It's not going to fall over andwe must have vacuumed those
footings three times I, I reckon.
So how much is a vac truck now?
A lot.
A lot.
So I reckon I did it threetimes.
In the end we poured blindinglayers and then it happened
again, so it was easier to vacthe blinding layer and
(49:16):
eventually I got the footing inand eventually I got retaining
wall up.
Here's the other thing.
With anxiety too, you stressand you're so wound up about one
thing.
But that one thing will getfixed.
You know, I used to stressabout my programs, my building
programs.
If it rained it'd knock me backa month and then how am I going
(49:38):
to get that month back?
And I'd get really wound upabout it.
But you know what?
I'd tick away at it, chip awayat it and eventually you'd look
back and there's that wall.
Speaker 2 (49:46):
it's built, finished yeah, well, mate, I, I, we could
definitely keep talking aboutthis, but we need to move on,
because you've got a lot ofother good stuff to share as
well.
So, um you, you work, you'reworking through all that.
Now you're on top of it, andnow you've decided to get stuck
in.
You're going to do your ownthing yeah.
Speaker 1 (50:06):
So that was that's when the psychiatrist said to me
you're not going to get rid ofit, you need to just work with
it, go and do something youreally wanted to do.
So I got myself in such a badstate too.
I hated my job, didn't want tobuild anymore, just didn't like
it.
Um, I'd lost my passion, I'dlost my fire, and I think that
(50:26):
that did also fuel the anxiety,because I didn't know what I
wanted to do.
What am I going to do that paysthis much money that I can
sustain my family?
And then I thought you knowwhat?
I've had a business registeredfor 15 years.
I've never done anything with itand my current close mate and
(50:46):
the owner of that house that youwent to the other day.
He came to me because I rentedI've rented that house twice now
.
He said I want you to renovate.
This is four years ago.
I said no, I'll get amd to doit.
He goes no, you want you to doit.
Um, and anyway, I ended updoing it.
So he said you're doing it forother people, you're good at it,
do it for yourself.
So, yeah, I decided to have ago and, to be honest, scary as
(51:11):
anything, but I love it.
Yeah, I love it.
It's a whole new challenge.
I get to choose how muchpressure I put on myself.
So if I don't pour concretetomorrow, it doesn't matter,
I'll pour it the next day.
Do you know what I mean?
So that's just an exampleyou're in control.
I'm in control of my stress andmy pressure, uh, and it's turned
out to be the way to go.
Speaker 2 (51:32):
So and then, yeah, you reached out three or four
months ago and jumped on boardwith elevate and you're, um,
you're kicking, like, you'rekicking goals with that.
Like you, you're reaching outall the time saying, man, I've
learned this.
Oh, this is fantastic.
Like so I look, mate, it reallyinspires me because and I'm more
inspired now that I know moreabout your background, because
(51:55):
and I actually think, when youwere just talking about that, I
think you actually you reachedout to me when you were tossing
up whether you should give it ago or not on your own.
It was one of the messages wehad on Instagram.
Speaker 1 (52:09):
I was very hesitant Should I do this, should I not?
And yeah, you gave me the right, the right push to do it.
Your, your program, what you do, I mean it's, it's very, it's
very.
It gives you a lot ofconfidence.
You know, and a lot of buildersout there, younger fellows,
younger than me, should jumponto it and and look into it.
(52:31):
I wish I, because a lot of thestuff that you do as well I
already know.
But when I read, you know whatyou're saying, or see what
you're doing on your podcast, itjust cements in my head.
I already know that and, okay,I'm not the only person that
thinks that that's the directionI'm going to go.
Speaker 2 (52:47):
Yeah, you're, you're surrounded like one of the most
powerful parts of of uh elevateis the community oh, the
community is unbelievable.
Speaker 1 (52:55):
I love that.
I love my band of brothers,mate, we're it's so good we just
when there's probably chats onmy phone now.
Yeah, we just talk all the timeyeah, because I'm.
Speaker 2 (53:05):
I have no doubt there's a lot of members in
elevate that have anxiety and uhyeah you're sharing this story
is definitely going to help helpthem a lot as well well, just
as I said to would be started.
Speaker 1 (53:16):
I hope someone just listens to me and you know if
it's, if they've got the samething, even remotely the same
thing going on, just yeah, juststart talking about it, look
into it so you were sayingbefore that you can pick it a
mile away.
Speaker 2 (53:31):
So like for people that are listening.
If they think there's someonein their team or one of their
contractors or something like,how would you approach it?
Speaker 1 (53:39):
um, okay, so you're talking about like.
I've been in the industry for37 years now.
I've dealt with a lot of egosmore in the last few years.
But if I go up to someone now,say a contractor walks onto my
job and they're a confidentperson, um, and I tell them, I
(54:01):
talk to them about what I'mdoing and what I want them to do
, I can pretty well judge bytheir body language.
Um, the way they look at me eyesis a big thing.
If they look you in the eyes,you know that they're going to
respect you.
If they don't, you knowstraight away they're not
interested in you.
That's how I judge that.
Um, you can usually tell to, ifyou give them a list of
(54:22):
instructions, that it ain'tfollow you.
No, they're.
They're an arrogant person or aperson that they've got a
strong personality.
They're going to do what theywant to do and they probably
don't have interest in peoplethat have an anxious nature.
Does that make sense?
Yeah, um, you can.
Normally.
You normally work it out bybody language and particularly
(54:43):
eyes.
Yeah, yeah, I'm a big advocateof that in fact, last week I met
a potential client.
This guy's well, you probablyworked out of work in the
wealthy realm.
He's got a big business inBrisbane.
He is a country boy.
I put my hand out and hedrilled my eyes.
(55:04):
I've never felt so muchintensity ever from shaking
someone's hand and being staredat.
Anyway, I got this contactthrough a mutual subcontractor.
They rang me an hour later andsaid you got the job.
He likes you, he's judged youstraight away and that would be
from that.
Yeah, that, straight away, thatcontact.
Speaker 2 (55:25):
Yeah, well, that's a lot of country people.
Country people judged by the.
Body language by when you putyour hand out to shake him.
You've got to be staring him inthe eyes, and how hard you, how
firm your handshake is and howmuch how you stare in the eyes
we um do you know what ahandshake means.
Speaker 1 (55:43):
No, you come without weapons because you've got to
put your hand out.
There's no weapon in your handso you come in peace.
Yeah, yeah, someone I think myold man told me that man years
ago.
That's how he was a wise fellayeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (55:57):
We, um, we're at the farm, uh, he might have been at
christmas time and uh, we'vejust become really good mates
with this guy out there, glenn.
That helps us look after theplace a bit and, like, I've just
learned so much off him.
He's a thoroughbred country boyand, um, we had the two girls
up there and, um, I'm not surehow it come about, but we was
(56:21):
either we were either sayinghello or saying goodbye and like
I put my hand out and gave hima handshake and I think I must
have said to the girls okay,I'll give, give glenn a
handshake, and he, um, I'm goodon you and then you, and then
they've shaken his hand.
But then he's held their hand.
He's like do you know how tolike look me in the eyes?
If you shake my hand, you'vegot to look me in the eyes.
So he's giving them a lesson onhandshaking.
Speaker 1 (56:42):
It is a very respectful thing to do.
And you ask how I judge someonethat doesn't or haven't got the
capacity to under.
It's not the capacity, but theydon't want to understand what
mental health is you just knowby their presence.
Well, I do, it's kind of hardto.
It's a hard one to answer,actually.
Yeah, they.
Speaker 2 (57:05):
There's a lot of people out there like I see it
now.
There's a lot of people outthere that as soon as you start
to talk about mental health,they roll their head down that's
, and that's the person that's.
Speaker 1 (57:16):
Well, there you go, there's.
That is that person.
Speaker 2 (57:18):
You see their face just drop yeah, or they turn
their head away, or they, they,they.
Well, like you said, they, they, they don't look at you.
Speaker 1 (57:27):
Yeah, that's um you see, they're just, they're not
focused.
Speaker 2 (57:30):
Yeah, and they're the ones you probably need to be
reaching out the most.
Speaker 1 (57:33):
Well, how I deal with that person is I am not afraid
of them.
I, straight away, then go intowell, don't really care what you
think, it's not a mental thing,it's not a competition either.
You're not trying to beat theirpersonality, you just know.
(57:58):
I know straight away, straightaway.
Well, it's a different way thatI'm going to talk to them, yeah
, and deal with them, um, butI'm not afraid of them.
One of my best mates, he's oneof those 50 percenters.
He does not believe it, hedoesn't want to know about it.
Yet he's got people around himthat have serious problems and
I've told him you need to get onboard because there's nothing
you can do to get rid of it.
It's there, yeah, but he's soarrogant about it.
That's his problem.
Speaker 2 (58:19):
It's his problem so what's next for Rybuild?
What's on the cards?
Speaker 1 (58:23):
okay.
So growing my business isprobably what is exactly where I
want to go.
We've we've started off thebusiness now and people know who
I am.
A lot of my old clients knowI'm out there.
They're telling their friends.
We've opened up a smallbusiness where we're going to
specialise in wine galleriesbecause I've done enough of them
.
Now I know how to do them.
(58:44):
Builders get them now in theirhouses.
They don't know what to do.
They think it's well.
It is actually quite astrategic process.
So we're going to offer aservice where we come in and we
build it for them and they don'thave to worry about it.
I've got contacts that supplyit, and I've just recently
opened up a development arm aswell, where a friend of mine and
I are just going to go and havea go at building stuff and
(59:06):
seeing if we can make a dollar,because I don't think you can
lose from now to the Olympics.
Speaker 2 (59:10):
Yeah, I'm the same mate In southeast Queensland.
Here it's well, I shouldn't sayyou can't, you can.
Speaker 1 (59:17):
You've got to be smart about things, oh yeah, but
but if you do Exactly, there'snot a lot.
Speaker 2 (59:22):
if you do a good product, you buy in the right
location, there's a lot of moneyto be made.
Speaker 1 (59:37):
Well, I'm lucky.
I've got a lot, of, a lot ofpeople around me that are
successful in business, a lot ofmates, uh, and now they're
they're all in their 50s andearly 60s and their businesses
run themselves.
They're looking for anotherchallenge, yeah.
So I've kind of said, hey, well, I want something to do
different.
How about we go together?
So I've lined that up.
Yeah, um, and I think I've gotthis is I've kind of considered
I might, I might have adhd.
I said this to my kids theother day and I laughed.
(59:58):
I said, dad, it's a given mate,what do you want to get told by
a doctor?
But I just want to know,because I have a lot of trouble
concentrating and I think italso contributes to the anxiety.
So that's the next step getthat under control.
Yeah, uh, yeah, and then justparticularly grow my business.
Really no good on you, mate.
Look to the anxiety.
Speaker 2 (01:00:14):
So that's the next step get that under control,
yeah, yeah, and then justparticularly grow my business
really Well, good on you, mate.
Look, I take my hat off to you.
I appreciate you coming onhaving a chat.
Speaker 1 (01:00:20):
No worries.
Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
I definitely think that you've touched a lot of
people by putting this out thereand telling your story.
So, mate, how can people get intouch with you that they want
to reach out to you telling yourstory?
So, mate, how can people get intouch with you that they?
Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
want to reach out to you Email or just if they jump
online and look up Rybuild it'sry underscore build on Insta and
just DM me there and I'll getback to them, or they can get me
on robertrybuildcomau.
Speaker 2 (01:00:46):
Yeah, awesome mate.
Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
But yeah, I'm there to help.
If anyone wants to know how Idid it, I'm happy to have a chat
.
Speaker 2 (01:00:51):
But yeah, I'm there to help.
If anyone wants to know how Idid it, I'm happy to have a chat
.
Yeah, awesome.
Well, like I said, I definitelyappreciate you sharing your
story.
It's huge and it's going tohelp some people.
So, guys, look, if you'veenjoyed this podcast and, yeah,
you want to share it with yourfriends or whatever, make sure
you like, share, subscribe allthose things and, yeah, we'll
see you on the next one.
Speaker 1 (01:01:16):
Are you ready to build smarter, live better and
enjoy life?
Then head over to live likebuildcom forward slash elevate
to get started.
Speaker 4 (01:01:26):
Everything discussed during the level up podcast with
me, duane pierce, is basedsolely on my own personal
experiences and thoseexperiences of my guests.
The information, opinions andrecommendations presented in
this podcast are for generalinformation only, and any
reliance on the informationprovided in this podcast is done
at your own risk.
We recommend that you obtainyour own professional advice in
(01:01:49):
respect to the topics discussedduring this podcast.
But yeah, I don't know how many nights I lay on
that couch at night because Icouldn't sleep.
I didn't want to wake my wife.
I'd go and sit on the couch andI'd be shaking and I just
couldn't sleep and every nightI'd say I'm going to get up and
I'm going to work, I'm going tofix my problems, but I just it's
like a brick wall is in frontof you.
You cannot get off that couch.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
G'day guys.
Welcome back to another episodeof Level Up.
We are back in the shed thisafternoon for another cracking
episode.
Looking forward to this onebecause we're going to talk
about a few things that wehaven't gone into depth on the
podcast before.
So just stay tuned and we'llsee where it gets to.
But I guarantee if you stickaround, you're in for a cracking
episode Today.
(00:45):
We've got Rob from Rybuild withus.
How are you, buddy, for acracking episode?
Today we've got Rob fromRyebuild with us.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
How are you buddy?
Yeah, good, Good, Dwayne.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Mate.
I am looking forward to thisconversation because we're going
to dive down the anxiety rabbithole a little bit.
But before we get into that,you and I we've spoken for a
long time, I think on instagramthere's been a few questions
backwards and forwards, but then, um, like face to face, we've
(01:13):
probably only really caught upin the last what six months yeah
, pretty much yeah um actually.
No, it'd be long, it's probablyeight months yeah well, I
started.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
I started with the launchpad.
What's that?
Three or four months ago?
Five months ago?
But yeah, I've been messagingyou before that.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yeah, but then before that you reached out because
we've got one of your guysworking for us now.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
That's correct, yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
So yeah, Rob's also now a member of Live, Life Build
an Elevate program.
He's definitely kicking somegoals there, yeah.
I love it, it's good Mate, takeus back.
How did you get in the industry?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Okay, so I've been around construction and building
industry all my life prettymuch.
My dad was a developer Beforethat.
He actually was in real estatein the early days of Brisbane.
I originally come from Roma,yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
We were farmers Country boy.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Pardon Country boy.
Yeah, born and bred country boy, but I pretty much grew up in
the city and the old man was.
He was in real estate for acompany called Dalgety's.
They were developers and thenfrom there he ended up being the
managing director of a bigdevelopment company here in
Brisbane who pretty well shapeda lot of Brisbane's landmark
(02:27):
icon landmarks around town.
Yeah, probably the most famousone that everyone will know
about, it's the Fortitude Valley.
He's the guy who pretty wellkicked off what it is today.
Yeah, and I actually worked onsome of the buildings in
Fortitude Valley back when I wasan apprentice.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Yeah, awesome, yeah.
And, man, that place haschanged a lot back when I was an
apprentice.
Yeah awesome and, man, thatplace has changed a lot.
I remember growing up we weretold you do not go there.
It was a wild joint.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
You went there to buy drugs and if you're a homeless
mate or you wanted to find alady for the night, that's what
it was like.
Yeah, Apparently, the councilwent to him and said, listen, we
want to do something with thevalley.
What's your idea?
And he came up with her foodand restaurant and entertainment
precinct.
And what have we gotten, almost40 years later there?
Speaker 2 (03:08):
look at it now yeah, and now you're throwing the mix.
You got all those sort ofmulti-res buildings that they
got bloody restaurants on top ofthem and all sorts of things
going on well, that's.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Yeah.
I was actually on one of themrecently, looked down on it and
I saw what he created and I waspretty proud of that and thought
, well, you know, if I couldaspire to be like him as forward
thinking, well, yeah, great.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah, awesome mate.
And then.
So how did you go from workingfor a development company to so?
Speaker 1 (03:39):
I was a child of Sorry, I went through I think it
was the 90s recession, um, theone that we didn't have to have.
So basically his business wentelsewhere around australia, um.
And back in those daysapprentices couldn't go work in
a state, they had to stay in intheir state.
So I had to find I think I wasmy third year I had to find work
(04:01):
.
So then I actually hooked upwith a builder who worked in the
same company.
He got retrenched and then Igot into domestic construction
that way and then from there Ifound my way into high-end
construction, and that cameabout because I rang, I wanted
to get my builder's license butyou had to do your two-year
(04:23):
supervision and I heard of abuilder called Wally Williams
back in those days who wanted asupervisor, and I put my hand up
.
He took me on and Wally used tobe one of the big builders in
town that built the high-endstuff.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
He was one of the best mate.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
Look I've never met the guy, but when?
Speaker 2 (04:41):
I was during my time and when I started subbing, like
his name would come upeverywhere.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I got my start with himand I thank him for that, and
that's where I really developedmy passion for that kind of work
, and I'm still doing it today.
I've been into other sectors ofconstruction which I found out,
which we're going to get tolater on.
That's not for me, and I'veended up finding my way back
(05:11):
into my own business doing thatsort of thing for clients who
want that kind of or caliber ofhome.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
Yeah, you do nice work.
The um, I kind of met you atone of your jobs at milton.
Yeah, whatever, a few monthsago the um, like the backyard on
that place, like the detail,like bloody hanging columns and
suspended steel work andoff-form concrete around it all
like it's pretty pretty full-onyeah, it is my kind of work's
not, it's not something you rush.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Uh, clients say to me when you're going to be
finished.
I'll say to them look, I don'tknow, it'll be finished when I.
When I'm finished, um, I'llgive them an indication, um, but
it's very detailed, like thatparticular one, we had off-form
concrete seats that wereactually a footing on ground
that you sat on, and the wholehouse is propped up by suspended
suspended posts, sidecantilevering posts.
(05:57):
Yeah to.
To work out how to do that tookme days, days and days yeah, no
, it was super impressive, mate.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
as soon as you walked down the side of that house and
around to that backyard youwere still building it while I
was there I was like holy shit,this is pretty serious.
Like you turn over to the frontof that place and it just
looked like a bit of an oldcottage and yeah, you get around
the back of it like holy shit,there's some work going on here.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
It is my passion.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
And I find here it is my passion, um, and I find it
very rewarding.
Now, yeah, I'm saying now so,but you, so you've recently
taken the leap to to getcranking on your own stuff.
Yeah, um, what, what'sencouraged that like I needed a
career change, but it wasn't a?
Speaker 1 (06:40):
career change.
But it wasn't a career changefrom changing what I do.
I needed to change directionwith what I do.
So I learned a lot from WallyWilliams' days and then from him
I went on and worked foranother guy that worked for
Wally as well.
He does the same kind of work.
I finished with RamConstructions.
(07:04):
I was like, well, well, I thinkI've had enough of this, this
kind of work.
I want to go and look at thecommercial stuff, which I did.
I actually got poached by oneof the big players in town, tier
I think they're tier two ortier three builder, I won't say
who they are.
Um, I got poached to build oneof their big clients houses in
ashgrove.
Coached to build one of theirbig clients' houses in Ashgrove.
(07:26):
So I don't know.
If you know Ashgrove, it'spretty well built on granite.
The job site the site was 600square metres, average slope 30
degrees, and the project managerthat I was reporting to missed
a line in the soil report thatsaid non-excavatable rock, 300
down.
(07:46):
And it was the first thing Iread when I started on day one.
What are we doing here?
He said, oh, you'll be done intwo weeks, 12 months, and one
week later I poured the blindinglayer for the slab oh, sorry
for the lift slab.
Yeah, um, and the pressure whenyou're in that space in
commercial, you know you've gotto reach your targets.
(08:08):
They want you to perform, youneed to have your slab down by
this date.
And I started to build thatpressure.
In the end I just went to themsaid, look, I I don't know when
I'm going to have thisexcavation finished.
And dead set took us 12 monthsso what?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
just on rock sores, it was pure granite 300 mpa rock
it always amazed me in thosesituations because you would
think from the soil tests, thatthe engineer and the architect
would have designed the housearound that.
Because, yeah, when you'retrying to excavate that sort of
ground and that quantity ofground, like it's just, it feels
(08:47):
like you're just throwing moneydown the drain yeah, you can't,
you can't excavate it, so wehad to.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
We ended up, the civil contractor and I put their
hands up and said we can'tbreak it, so the deal's off.
So look, the whole thing wasdone.
So their client was a majordeveloper, industrial developer,
and obviously they got us tobuild their house.
I don't know what deals werebeing done there, but I was just
told keep going yeah don'tworry about your schedule, we'll
(09:14):
worry about that when you startto build.
So, yeah, we, we got throughthat stage.
Um, I reckon it cost themnearly seven or eight hundred
thousand.
This is back in 2016, yeah, sowhat it would be now I don't
know.
Um, so as soon as I start tobuild, yeah, the pressure was on
and tight site, split level,road, power lines everywhere.
(09:37):
So, logistical nightmareeverything had to be craned in
by um small crane.
We couldn't have slew cranesbecause you just too much stuff
around.
Yeah, um, and they were superhigh end on their safety.
So I had to do all the safetyevery day.
And, yeah, you just had allthis pressure all the time.
And if you didn't do it, whyhaven't you done this?
(09:58):
And you know it all built up.
Yeah, anyway, six months later,I go to pour the top floor slab.
So it's a four-story house, topfloor is concrete and I'm about
five meters out from the lastsupport point in a suspended
slab and, mind you, we're 12meters in the air.
And, oh, that's right.
The, the enclave that we're in,had a 200 a 20 ton weight
(10:22):
limited bridge to get in.
That was the only way in, theonly way out, so I had to factor
all my concrete trucks as tohow much concrete was in them.
And it was a late pour.
We didn't start pouring thatuntil about 9 30 in the
afternoon, so I had time againstme to get it in.
So it occurred it was winter aswell.
So I had it all stacked upanyway.
(10:43):
And the concrete, the pump,starts breaking down and we're
five metres out from the lastsupport point.
We've got another five to goand, as you know, concrete's
only got a two-hour life.
It starts to go off and I'vegot trucks down the street
because the pump's broken downand I think I waved through two
trucks.
So what's that?
(11:03):
$1,800 with the concrete, yeah,and we're still nowhere near
the support point and I'veprobably got 15 or 20 minutes to
go before she's buggered andwe've got to stop.
And, thank God, the pumpstarted again and we're away
again.
And I remember the end of thatday, all the management coming
(11:24):
out to me and saying whathappened?
Why did this happen?
Why didn't you think of this?
And I just felt this massiveweight.
Anyway, that was the first timeI went home one night and I had
the shakes and I thought thisis pretty hectic.
Yeah, anyway, I got throughthat.
We finished that project.
There was a lot of incidenceshappened in that house, so that
(11:49):
didn't really rock my boat or Igot away from them.
I didn't hurt me too much.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
But the next really bad anxiety attack I got so at
this point in time, like becausethis is all part of your story
and your journey, but at thispoint in time you didn't know
that you're dealing with anxiety.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
No, I knew I was a pretty nervy person.
I used to worry a lot aboutthings.
People used to say you worrytoo much.
But in my mind I was goingthrough the scenarios.
I actually used to tell myselfbe prepared for the worst,
because then I'll have control.
And that's apparently a verytypical anxiety sufferer
mentality.
Be prepared for that worst incase scenario, so you know what
(12:32):
to do yeah um, yeah.
So then I decided I didn'treally want to work in that
environment because they wouldjust put too much pressure on
you and I'm not built for that.
And I realized that, uh.
So then I ended up going andworking for another company who
did multi-res, and my first job,um, was a bunch of townhouses,
(12:56):
12 townhouses.
I had to build them in 10months and, like I'm the only
guy it's just me and our crew ofchippies, young chippies um, I
got the job done, but you can'tbuild that quick, that well,
yeah, and every day I'd beworried about what I hadn't done
or what I hadn't controlled, orwhat mistakes have been made
(13:17):
and who'd done what you know.
So I'd lie in bed and I think,oh crap, I haven't organized
that.
I got that coming tomorrow andI've got concrete booked for the
next day and I haven't orderedsteel.
There's all that stuff in theair.
It's just too much.
Yeah, too much.
But me I'd go.
No, I'll take this challenge on, I'm going to do it.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
It's a lot for.
So what were you?
Were you a project manager?
Speaker 1 (13:46):
I project manager.
I was project manager, yeah, Iwas project manager and foreman
and head of safety on a 12million dollar bill.
Yeah, it was nuts.
Yeah, but me I'd take it all on.
So, yeah, no, I don't wantanyone to judge me and say, oh,
he can't do the job, because Ithink in industry too, there's a
lot of ego definitely a lot ofego and that ego becomes
competitive.
And if, if you, I felt, if Icouldn't do it, I was being
(14:10):
judged, and if I'm being judged,then that led to failure for me
.
Um, but I didn't know this atthe time.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
I'm just plugging along, just satisfying the
people that I had to answer tothere's a lot of pressure in
that, that space in there, likewith um, the bigger builders and
project managers and stuff likethey get a lot of weight on
their shoulders well, it comesfrom the top.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
So the developer puts the pressure on the builder.
Developer's got his own set ofpressures so he just pushes that
downhill.
That goes to the company owner.
Then the company owner justkeeps funneling it down and the
guy on the job he's the one thatcollects.
I reckon the site manager andthe site foreman on those jobs
has got the harvest job oh,definitely, definitely yeah, I
know because I've been there.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Yeah, I used to see it when I um, when I finished my
time and went out subbing andlike we'll work for a lot of
those big developer builders anddoing lots of tilt up
commercial sort of developments.
We did a lot of large unitdevelopment blocks and like
multi-rise up to sort of fiveand six stories and like I was
(15:16):
under pressure taking on all thecarpentry work on the jobs.
But you would see, like thosejobs generally had a side office
and like the, the sitesupervisor and the construction
manager, like they'd be thefirst ones there they'd be,
they'd be there till late mostnights and like all day, every
day, all you saw was them on thephone arguing with people,
(15:36):
putting putting more pressure onon everyone else on site, like
it was just a mess well, I cansay to you honestly, I did 55
incoming phone calls in an hourand those were the ones that I
answered yeah so the phone wasjust constantly ringing,
constantly beeping, and I hadmessages after that.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
Yeah, that was just the typical morning around about
eight, between sort of seveno'clock to ten o'clock.
That was a typical day yeah andthen you got to breathe it
because they all had smoke.
Oh, and then you get to go toyour office in the afternoon.
Put your head between you.
What's next?
Yeah, yeah so then where did it?
go from, so from after then thenext big, the one that really
(16:17):
rocked my boat and I realized Iwell, I actually didn't realize
I had a problem, but it reallyrocked me was I did another
block of units so I went fromthat job, did a couple little
jobs for that guy.
Then I had a big block of unitsin brisbane and it was an
unlevel site so I had to build atwo and a half meter wall down
the back and then we had tobackfill it, bring it up two and
(16:39):
a half to nothing at the front.
It's a small cut at the front.
And I remember during thedesign and quoting stage we
quoted the backfill and ourclient came along and said no, I
don't want to pay that, that'stoo much.
The engineering was all spessedout.
It all said that we had to have200 kpa compaction.
(16:59):
Um, I learned a lot with thisone, so I won't go, I'll just
move on with this.
Anyway.
He, um, he took over that startpart of contract and found a
cheaper guy and I actually saidin the pre-start meeting I don't
want to be on site when he doesit.
Um, and then someone else saidno, as a builder we have to have
(17:19):
a presence, you need to bethere.
So this guy brought starts tobackfill.
We did a pre-start program withhim.
He said oh yeah, I'll take acouple days, I'm going okay,
something like this probablyneeds five or six days because
if you know you've got to do itin layers, yeah, it's got to be
sprayed, rolled, tested, sprayed, rolled till you get up.
This guy did it in a day, likeit was, I think, 70 trucks uh,
(17:44):
came in, dumped and go and thenthe roller would just roll it in
.
The water truck broke down andI'm going this ain't good, this
isn't good.
Where's your water truck?
Where's your geo tester?
Where's this?
And I was literally told tofuck off, get off site.
You don't know what you'redoing.
And I said well, I'm not, I'mhere to supervise you.
I sent an email saying this iswrong.
(18:05):
That went out.
Anyway, the other thing wasyou'll get your compaction
certificate at the end, whichthey gave me a compaction
certificate, but it was toiletpaper really.
Who did it?
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Well, I don't know names, but did they get a
company in too?
Speaker 1 (18:21):
They had it.
Well, it turns out that thecivil company were dodgy.
They went bankrupt not longafterwards, run by a young biker
I don't think he was, I thinkhe was 27.
It was his business, and thegeotech company stitched up with
him were also being chased byother geocompanies because they
were doing the wrong thing.
Yeah, that all happened behindme.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Yeah, but that's another perfect example.
But like I bang on about allthe time in this industry you
have to have experience.
You can't just do a few jobsand then think that you can do
everything well, see again, herecomes the arrogance in it and
the and the ego.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
So I was told, don't worry about it, it's fine.
But I knew in my heart, no,it's not.
My gut feeling was like no,this isn't right.
And I made a bit of noise, butnot enough.
And now I know, when I feelthat strongly about something,
make a heap of noise.
Yeah.
Anyway, yeah, we got it done.
(19:21):
We started to build.
I started putting in the padfootings for all the columns.
Like the pad footings werethree meters square, 800 deep,
um strip footings were 600 by600, and I did that.
I was on.
I set myself a target to get itall in before the wet season
hit.
And sure enough it hit.
It hit hard and all that.
That's right.
(19:42):
We put footings in and putwalls up, so basement walls, and
then we got rain and then Ibrought in the civil guys to
start doing the drainage.
Different contractor and heopens the ground up to put his
pipes and his stormwater and hiswater oozing out of the ground
and I'm looking at it going,this isn't good, but still
(20:04):
didn't say I told my superiorsand said oh, you'll be right,
keep going.
We filled it in, cleaned thejob up.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
So what was your?
Because I think this sort oftalking about this stuff on the
podcast will be educating a lotof people.
Explain why you were worriedthat water was oozing out of the
ground.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Because it meant the ground wasn't hard enough.
Yeah, yeah, it hadn't compactedit enough and it was like a
sponge just sucked it in yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
So for those that haven't done a lot of this type
of work like that, the wholeidea of putting it in in layers,
like most engineers will uh andlook, I'm definitely no expert,
you need to talk to yourengineers about this.
But um, you might agree, rob,like most engineers generally
will state in their paperwork,or they'll come to site, you
might do a pre-start on thesetypes of jobs and they'll tell
you a process, and generallythat process will be like
(20:52):
pushing the soil out with a drotor some sort of machine in in
100 to 200 mil layers, yep, acertain amount of times rolled
over with a sheep's foot rollerwater on top of it and then just
keep going in layers and theytest it.
They test each layer and they'vegot to get their compaction at
that layer so then, they knowthey've got solid compaction all
the way to the top yeah, and if, if you get compaction like the
(21:15):
heart of the ground, the lesswater it absorbs.
So like that's that, yeah, likethe and this is the thing, like
people in the industry don'tknow and like obviously those
other contractors didn't know,like when you've seen the water
oozing out of the ground, likethat's just a sign of shit work.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
Yep, it is, mind you, my pressure's, my anxiety's
building when I'm seeing this.
And I had a really good machineoperator that kept telling me
daily, rob, there's somethingwrong with this ground.
But in back of my head I hadmore voices you'll be right,
(21:53):
keep going.
And I had the completion dateof that job because my client
was saying I got buyers whobought to want to move in.
Right, so that's coming in onyou.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
So this isn't just to go back.
This isn't your job.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
No, no, I'm running it, so I'm working for a guy
here, Anyway, and then we moveon and we clean the job up and
I'm still sus.
I'm walking out the job.
This is where it really hits.
And I look down my job and Ilook down all my perp lines and
my block work and the back ofthe job is dropping.
I could see it dropping off andI know my block lay was not bad
(22:24):
, not that bad.
So I went home that night andI'm edgy, like I feel this sort
of nervousness which everyonegets.
But then I went back the nextday with my laser level and I
checked every footing down theback and she's 25 mil lower than
everything else, and I don'tmake 25 mil mistakes like that
and then I felt this wave ofjust sheer anxiety go through my
(22:49):
body.
My legs went weak.
I had to sit down.
I felt sick because I knew whatwas going on.
I knew she was sinking and I'mlike, oh crap, what do I do?
I think I took and this is inthe morning and I've probably
got 20 guys on site block, blocklayers, civil guys, just
tradies, and they're all comingat me.
(23:09):
What do you want to have in?
I'm trying to deal with thatand this, yeah.
So then I eventually got myselftogether and I rang my boss and
I said look, I need a meetingthis afternoon with you and the
construction manager.
Oh, yeah, sure, what's wrong?
I've got a problem.
Oh, it'll be right, come on in.
So that night I went in.
We say, I said boys, we've gota problem.
I've got footings at a 25 millower than they were four weeks
(23:32):
ago when I put them in.
Okay, how do we fix it?
We'll just, we'll attachanother footing to it, put a
pier down, attach a footing toit, be right.
So we rang the engineer, toldthem they come to site a couple
days later and they're lookingat us.
They're all gray, so they'vegot a problem.
It's a gentleman.
We can't fix this easily.
To do this fix, we've got todig under every footing and put
(23:57):
more concrete down to where weget 200 kpa in ground compaction
, which was natural, which wasabout 200 below where I started
four months ago yeah some of theholes were nearly three meters
deep under the footing, yeah.
So we had to prop everything upand then pour concrete in up to
the underside of the footing andyou had to vibrate in such a
(24:18):
way that the concrete camearound.
So you knew you were completelylike, supported yeah, and it
took six months and cost 200k.
Holy shit, yeah.
And I'm like, oh, my god, am Igoing to send everyone broke?
Oh, it all went to court.
I didn't go to court, it wentlaw legal.
So both parties were goinglegal, you know, getting legal
advice, and all the legal legalspointed to me and said he's the
(24:43):
problem.
He allowed concrete to bepoured, yeah, when in actual
fact, I didn't want to pour it,but I got told to pour it yeah,
shit, mate.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
How's that buddy go down?
Speaker 1 (24:53):
um, yeah, that's what really destroyed me.
That's when I real, that's whenI really had anxiety.
I didn't I every night, I justcouldn't sleep.
I um, I didn't want to go towork, I still got.
I finished the building, I got,I got help too.
I went.
At that point I went to aneighbor, that's right.
My neighbor was a psych nurseand I went down to him and said
(25:17):
Trevor, I think I'm having aheart attack.
And he said well, what's wrong?
I said I can't breathe and I'vegot pain in my, in my heart.
I thought I had it's actuallyassociated pain.
And he said you're having amental breakdown, an anxiety
attack, sorry.
And I said, oh, that wouldexplain why I'm not sleeping.
(25:38):
He goes yeah, yeah, somethingmay just happen.
What is it?
And I told him he said, yeah,you're gonna have to go and get
help with that because you can'tfix it.
Yeah, and that's when Irealized, okay, well, I'll go
and get help.
So I did.
I went and saw a psychiatristand they said, yeah, that major
(25:59):
event has caused this to happen.
We don't want to do medicationbecause I don't believe in it.
Um, we'll just fix it.
We went through all thecognitive exercises and stuff
and it worked for a little while.
I tried some tablets, but theywere terrible.
They just couldn't function.
So I went natural and I triedto just get through that level
(26:19):
of doubt that I had in my mind.
I'd tell myself, no, I'm I'mgood at what I do, but then egos
would kick in and bash you backdown again, like external egos.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
Um, and the whole time too, I hid this from my
wife but I'm just sitting herelike um, I take my hat off to
you like.
This is a lot to share yeah, soI reckon there'd be a lot of
people in our industry that areprobably going through what
you're talking about right nowwell, this is why I wanted to do
this.
Speaker 1 (26:46):
So if I can just reach out to one person on this
podcast and they hear my storyand assimilate and go, well, he
fit, he beat it, so can I.
But yeah, I don't know how manynights I lay on that couch at
night couldn't sleep, I didn'twant to wake my wife.
I'd go and sit on the couch andI'd be shaking and I just
couldn't sleep.
And every night I'd say Ididn't want to wake my wife.
I'd go and sit on the couch andI'd be shaking and I just
(27:07):
couldn't sleep.
And every night I'd say I'mgoing to get up and I'm going to
work, I'm going to fix myproblems, but I just it's like a
brick wall is in front of youcannot get off that couch and
move, to go and do somethingelse.
It just you can't do it.
People say we used to say to mewhy don't you get up and go and
do some work?
You just can't do it.
It's a mental thing.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
So what's happening?
What's going on in your head?
Are you watching telly?
Speaker 1 (27:33):
No, just sitting in the dark, couldn't turn TV on.
I'd turn it on and it wouldjust start negative thoughts
racing.
I could be watching Days of OurLives and I'd already start.
I'd go back to the job thinkingwhy did I, why didn't I argue
more that day?
And, holy crap, have I madethat thing wrong?
(27:54):
You start to doubt yourself.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
Question other work you have built.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
What's going to go wrong next?
You know what haven't I coveredproperly?
What's going to fall down?
And nothing's ever fallen downfor me, nothing.
We fixed that job.
Like that job.
I still drive past it.
It's five years, six years oldnow and there's not one crack in
it.
You know it's done.
Developer made good money outof it and we all moved on.
(28:20):
And that's the thing withanxiety you get really down and
out about the bad stuff.
You don't look back at what thegood stuff is.
So I keep going with the.
I hid this from my wife for fiveyears and it actually caused a
bit of trouble.
And I've got to say my wiferealised that there was a
(28:45):
problem with with me.
Um, she's one of these peoplethat doesn't understand mental
health, but she does now.
Um, she realized that, like Ithink.
I questioned her and I said,look, I'm not well, there's
something wrong.
I need you to help me.
So yeah, she did.
She said we'll go and get help.
So that's when I realized, well, I really need to fix this, um,
(29:11):
and I went and got more help.
This is years later because yougot kids as well, yeah I got
three daughters and here's theweird thing about it my eldest
had anxiety problems because shetransitioned from primary
school to high school by herselfand I'd have to pick her up in
the mornings.
Get her out of bed, honey, it'sgoing to be all right.
(29:32):
Face your fears and go toschool.
It'll be all right when you getthere.
And just last week, when I wasthinking about this podcast, I
realized hang on a minute.
That's exactly what I had to doto get out of it was face my
fears and just get myself towork, because I did that for
five years.
I put myself off that couch.
(29:53):
Go and have a shower, have acup of tea, get in that truck,
drive to the job.
As soon as I opened the gateand the boys started to walk in,
the fears would go go.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Yeah, so how are you functioning, mate, if you're?
Up all night just sitting thereI don't know.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
So another telling point was I woke up one morning.
I had to do a Bunnings run andI woke up in the middle of the
intersection with my foot on thebrake, because I was only
getting two hours sleep a nightand had been like that for a
couple of years, on and off.
And that's when, when, yeah, mywife and I decided it was
pretty serious.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
We've got to fix this .
So sorry, just go back to you.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
You went to bunnings and you fell asleep in an
intersection so I was at the endof a job and you know so I
could have a job.
You're constantly on thehardware store picking up stuff.
Actually, I think that day Ineeded a break.
I need to get off the job.
So, boys, I'm going to go toBunnings and pick up the stuff
we need for this job over hereand I literally sitting at the
lights in the turn right laneindicator on and then next thing
(30:54):
, you know, I wake up in themiddle of the intersection,
slowly creeping forward, so I'dprobably moved 20 metres.
It's a major intersection inBrisbane too.
No one had tooted me oranything, and then holy shit,
that's pretty serious.
There's other ones like that.
There's Ricketts Road Bridgedown in the bay in the Redlands.
It's probably I don't know 150metres long.
(31:17):
I've crossed that a couple oftimes, Don't remember it, Just
had a nano nap, yeah.
So anxiety in that condition isdangerous, and the sooner I
realised I had something wrongthe better.
And I think to talk about whatI did to get out of it.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
Have you spoken about ?
Speaker 1 (31:39):
this before.
No, no.
This is why I wanted to do this.
I haven't spoken publicly aboutit.
I've spoken to my family, mygirls, my daughters.
I've told them because they allsaw the issues that I had.
I told them when I realisedthat I had a problem.
It's like it's exactly the sameas being an alcoholic.
(32:01):
It's like it's exactly the sameas being an alcoholic.
If you admit that you're analcoholic, you know, then you've
got it.
You know what you've got to doto fix it.
So I admitted that I sufferanxiety.
So I decided to just ignore thearrogance in the industry and
that whole beef.
I'll get over it.
So I tell people now withstrong personalities hang on,
(32:23):
back off.
I actually suffer anxiety.
You're giving it to me.
I need five minutes, um, andyou'd be surprised if I'm if
being straight up and in theirface about it.
They back off.
Yeah, because I know that I cando what they want me to do.
Yeah, but I just need time toprocess it yeah, mate, that's
(32:46):
like, this is that's huge.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Like yeah, good on you.
Like um, so what was the hell?
Like where did you go to dealwith this?
Like is it?
Speaker 1 (32:55):
um, I just I started out well.
The first thing I had to do is,yeah, admit it, just
acknowledge it.
So, yeah, I'm not, I've gotsuffering anxiety, right.
Then I went to my GP, told himabout it he actually had
experience with it himself, myGP and he then put me on the
right steps to fix it.
(33:16):
So we went and got apsychiatrist this time it was a
lady who I wasn't really.
I don't want to be sexist aboutthis at all, but you want
blokes?
Want to go see women?
Uh, blokes about this stuff?
No, the ladies, I think, areprobably more across it than the
boys are the men doctors I'vebeen to a couple of male doctors
didn't like them.
(33:38):
So that process of gettingpsychological help you've
actually got to feel comfortablewith that, with your therapist,
you've got to actually feel aconnection.
Yeah, um, and I found this ladyand she started to step me
through it and I think I'd seenthree psychiatrists my third by
the stage, over 10 years and sheactually said to me I think it
(34:01):
was last session, rob, you'renever, ever going to get rid of
this, you're always going tohave it.
What you need to do is get itunder control.
And I thought you know whatthat makes sense?
Yeah, because I'd talked to herabout changing careers and that
sort of stuff.
She said don't change careersbecause it's going to come back
in the next one.
You just need to get it undercontrol.
(34:29):
So then I went on a rampage ofgoogle what is it?
What is it?
And I found it.
I'm normal.
I'm like everybody else outthere most people who suffer it,
uh, either very highfunctioning, they're
perfectionists and they thinkabout the worst case scenario
instead of the best.
So then I started to change mymentality.
I did get medication, so I'm ona very low dose drug that helps
(34:51):
me sleep.
So my brain?
When I wake up with a panicattack, everything kicks in.
All the chemicals kick in, thebrain fires up.
That's what was stopping mefrom sleeping.
They're giving me a mask, adrug that helps me sleep.
Yeah, it doesn't stop theanxiety, it just helps me sleep.
It's not a drug that you knocksyou out.
Speaker 2 (35:12):
I don't know how it works, it just controls the
chemical in my mind you weresaying before we started talking
about it, because so rob and Ihave had a few chats over the
last couple of months and whenRob started telling me about
this a couple of weeks ago, Iwas like man, like, if you're
comfortable, I'd love to get youon the podcast and share this,
because a lot of people on thepodcast, including myself, have
(35:36):
spoken about anxiety, but not inthis sort of detail.
So I definitely admire you fortelling me your story, but you
were saying that one of thehardest parts is like 50 of
people know about it, 50 ofpeople don't.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
yeah, say in my I don't know what the real numbers
are, but in for me to level itin my head, 50 of people
understand anxieties, have gotit, and the other 50% of people
don't.
Those people to me now are veryobvious.
I know them straight away byshaking their hand or talking to
them.
They're usually highlymotivated people.
(36:16):
Some of them, a lot of them,are bosses and they don't really
have the space to understand it.
And that's what I think themodern world now needs to do is
educate that person.
Hey, this is actually an illness.
We know a lot more about it.
It's not going to go away.
You need to accept that some ofyour staff, your friends, your
(36:39):
family have it and learn aboutit so you can support them.
Because I mean me, hiding itfrom my wife was probably the
worst thing I could have done.
We would have fixed this yearsago.
If we'd have had that row backthen I wouldn't have gone
through what I've gone through.
But I guess I've gone throughwhat I've gone through to learn
(37:00):
about it and then hopefully sithere and tell someone else to
realise they have anxiety andthen go and here and tell
someone else to realize theyhave anxiety and then go and get
it fixed because um it's likeit affects your whole family
life, doesn't it?
yeah, I wasn't present.
Yeah, yeah, I'd be.
Yeah, when I was in a badattack, some of my attacks would
(37:21):
go for weeks, some months.
Yeah, yeah, I was justconstantly on edge.
I wouldn't sleep for five orsix weeks, probably two, three
hours a night.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Weeks and weeks and weeks on end and was it always
to do with work?
Like something that washappening at work always work,
always work.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
And then work was fear of failure, which then
leads to off and judgment, whichthen I thought, oh, I'm gonna
lose my job, you know, because Iobviously I'm showing to these
people I can't do it, they'regonna get rid of me and get
someone else.
They, they can do it.
But I've since learned there'sno one out there.
Speaker 2 (37:58):
That's like that but you, um yeah, like I'm just
thinking about everything you'resaying and then thinking about
my like what?
I think I've got anxiety andI've got a lot of the signs that
you are talking about like I'mthe worst I'm the worst fucking
sleeper ever, and what you justsaid is exactly why I don't
sleep like I wake up and, likeyou said, everything just turns
(38:20):
on and I'm wide awake and I'mthinking and my uh, I think
about failure all the time whenI do posts on socials and that
sometimes I talk about I've gotto fight my demons.
That's what I'm talking aboutit is your demons.
I feel like there's someonesitting on my shoulder.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
You've got a name for yours.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
I do now Bob.
Speaker 1 (38:40):
Yeah, yeah, I actually took that.
I should name mine, but mine'spretty quiet now.
Yeah, I actually took that as a.
Yeah, I should name mine, butmine's pretty quiet now.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Yeah, but I definitely feel there's going to
be a lot of people listening tothis podcast that are sitting
there listening and thinking,fuck, this is what I'm going
through, this is what I'mdealing with.
But I'm actually sitting herethinking, too, about some of my
team members and thinking like,this is them, this is what
they're doing.
Speaker 1 (39:10):
Yeah, bashing themselves up?
Yeah, because they don't wantto disappoint.
They don't want to disappointyou, but they won't.
Um, they probably, theyprobably would, because they get
themselves so wound up.
Um, because this is what washappening to me.
I'd'd get so wound up and sotired I wouldn't stop and think
about a major decision and thenlater a problem would come out
(39:33):
and I'd just go oh, that'sbecause I rushed it that day.
I didn't stop because I'm tired.
Do you know what I mean?
So we get so wound up with whatwe do, trying to trying to get
to the end of the day or amilestone or something on a job
site, um, and we forget to takea breath, stop and look at what
(39:56):
we're doing before we jump intoit.
So I do.
I'm, I'm bad at it, yeah, um,but I'm.
I'm getting on top of that now,where I take a deep breath,
three deep breaths, and then Ithink about what I'm doing
before I commit to it, and ninetimes out of ten that three deep
breaths, I'll realize I'veforgotten something.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Yeah, I can't remember where I picked it up
from, but something that I'vedone for a while now, for a few
years and I definitely thinkit's helped with my anxiety is I
realized that to to moveforward with anything, you've
got to slow down slow down tospeed up.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
Yeah, ask my boys, you ask leon.
Yeah, I say that to my guysevery day slow down to speed up,
fellas yeah and like so I applythat to everything in my life.
Speaker 2 (40:41):
So, uh, it can be whether camille and I are
thinking about doing adevelopment or an investment, or
even if we're doing somethingat home with the girls, or like
I definitely do it on site, likeI tell the boys all the time
like don't just rush into it,take 10 minutes in the morning,
have a thing about what you gotto do, slow down and then move
forward, and I think that makes,if you apply that to everything
(41:04):
in your life, it it does make abig difference.
And that was one of my biggestproblems was I was just always
flat out, and I think my beingflat out was my way of, I guess,
trying to push it to the side.
Maybe.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
Yeah, that's exactly what it is.
Yeah, you go fast, it's like aboat.
You're going fast, you'repushing everything to the.
It's like a boat.
You're going fast.
You're pushing everything tothe side to get to the, get to
where you're going to, and thenyou deal with what's behind you
later.
But, in actual fact, if you slow, I find, if you slow down
here's another one of myanalogies I use.
Some people like to race up toa gate and smash it over and
(41:42):
walk through it, and then theteam behind them fixes it.
Or you can go up to the gate,open it, walk through and close
it with no damage.
Yeah, yeah, that one works aswell.
That's a country one, that's mycountry boy coming out, but, um
, for me to fix it, that'sprobably that's the next step
(42:02):
that I had to do.
So I had to fix the problem, ifI can talk about that.
Yeah.
So step one was to realize,yeah, I have an issue and I'm
not sleeping, I'm not healthy,and I need to fix that.
So then I went down the Googletrap and started to research
what was wrong and what anxietyis, and the psychiatrist's
(42:25):
feedback as well, and it allcome down to me focusing on the
negative and the what-ifs, thebad what-ifs.
So I turn that around prettyquick.
I um, I walk as much as I cannow in the mornings I wake up.
I just if it's pitch black atthe moment, I just walk the dog
to the park which is at the endof the street, and back, and I
actually have a cup of tea in myhand and think about all the
(42:47):
good things that are going tohappen today.
If something's on my mind whenI wake up, I've got this saying
I'm going to go get in front ofit.
That came from a show onNetflix Ozark.
Yeah, I don't know if you knowthat.
No, that show was about.
It was Jason Bateman.
He was a criminal organizationsaccountant and he was in charge
(43:08):
of the money laundering.
So he had a lot of pressure,that guy.
He started just saying I've gotto get in front of this.
And I did the same thing.
If something's worrying me orI'm getting anxious from it, I
actually go for it.
I go for it.
I get in front of it to findout what is the problem here.
(43:29):
Why am I anxious?
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Yeah, so is that like it's your routine?
So has routine helped you dealwith this?
Speaker 1 (43:38):
Yes, so every day now I get up and have a cup of tea.
It depends.
Some days I don't always walkto the park, but I'll always sit
with the dog.
It'll either be out the back inthe garden or I'll go for a
walk with her and I'll thinkabout what's on my mind and what
I'm doing today.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
Yeah, yeah, and that helps settle the nerves yeah and
prepare you for what you'regoing to get up to.
Yeah, the um mate, I think,yeah, I definitely think it's in
.
It's incredible that you cansit here.
And yeah, I definitely thinkit's incredible that you can sit
here and talk openly about it,because it's going to help
people like guarantee it, Iguess, for anyone that's
listening to the podcast orwatching the podcast and thinks
(44:15):
that you may have anxiety orsomething going on like, I guess
, reach out, I'm sure you canreach out to Rob and have a chat
.
Or, as you know, we're bigsupporters of the TX boys.
Give, give the TX hotline acall if you need to.
But, um, a lot of people in ourindustry have this say yeah,
like it's.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
I see it every day, yeah all right and I, when I was
in my worst, I said I washelping my kids, I was helping
blokes on site having breakdowns.
I'd have to go up and give thema hug and say, yeah, okay, mate
, you know, like, take a breath.
You know, go and go and grab adrink of water or go and sit in
my shed for five minutes.
I'll come and have a chat toyou.
And I've talked them through it.
And it's amazing too.
(44:55):
The other thing too is don't beafraid to talk about it.
So this whole perception thatyou know you got anxiety or
you're weak, you're not, not,you're not, you're normal, and I
started to talk about it toowith people.
People I would never haveexpected to suffer it.
I'd tell them, yeah, I'm just abit anxious or I've got, maybe,
(45:16):
a panic attack.
I'd tell them that I wasn'tcomfortable and they'd start to
talk to me about them and whatthey do to get through it.
So I mentioned medication before, say, um, a gentleman that I
worked with I still do very,very, very successful
(45:36):
businessman uh, I found out hehad chronic, uh, depression and
anxiety.
I never had the depression, buthe then said how he beat it?
Uh, he ended up being a gymjunkie, gotta do.
He's a crossfit maniac, yeah,so he'd go and do crossfit in
the mornings and then he'd goand do his business thing during
the day like big business.
(45:58):
Yeah, like what he does ispretty crazy.
Um, and he said as for thesleeping, you got to try this.
It it won't knock you out, itjust helps you go to sleep,
releases the sleep chemical inyour brain and off you go and
you wake up the next day freshand it does it's I'll have to
get some of that off you mateI'll let you know what it is.
It's fully legal, um.
But yeah, talking to otherpeople, don't be afraid to to
(46:21):
bring it up, you know yeah youdon't?
Some people just go oh yeah,and that's the 50% that don't
want to know about it or don'tunderstand it.
But the other 50 that do,they'll start talking to you.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
And talking is everything.
Isn't it Like?
People need to talk more.
Speaker 1 (46:36):
It is You've got to talk.
Speaker 2 (46:37):
Yeah, Like you say it's hard, Like it's a bloke.
Do you think it's a blokeything?
Speaker 1 (46:43):
Blokes are worse.
Women talk stuff through.
They just do so, men.
I think it's changing, dwayne.
I think it's changing becausewe know more about it.
Boys are starting to say, yeah,okay, maybe I do have a problem
.
I honestly do think it alsostems to domestic violence,
because blokes don't know how toreact with it.
(47:05):
They're probably sleep deprived, they're worried about their
jobs.
So then that aggression iscoming out at home, you know, or
in their personal lives.
So I think people need to lookat that.
It didn't with me, but I knowother people, other blokes I
know, that had issues on site.
I question their homerelationships, yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
So yeah, I, I can see that, yeah, through some of the
people on site, like, I think,because we've got to sleep well,
that was.
Speaker 1 (47:36):
That's a big thing.
Sleep so as soon as you.
I get six hours a night now,which is enough for me, yeah,
but without that you can'tfunction.
Speaker 2 (47:43):
Yeah, just can't yeah , and I think it's important,
like what you said, you've gotto find a way to deal with.
Deal with it like um, becauseif you're not dealing with these
things and it does build up andwho knows where it can end up
get in front of it.
You don't want to be um fallingasleep in a major intersection,
that's for sure yeah, that was.
Speaker 1 (48:02):
Um, yeah, that was interesting that day.
That was, yeah, that actuallydid frighten me that day because
it was the day that I'd I thinkI'd I'd had a bad.
I was having a bad time on ajob site.
I was on top of the job, that'sright.
I remember now it was a fewyears ago I was on a project
(48:23):
that just won a bucket load ofawards and we were hit with all
that rain.
Remember we got a lot of rainand I had ground open everywhere
.
Speaker 2 (48:32):
Don't tell me about rain.
It's been fucking raining foreight months now.
Speaker 1 (48:35):
Another footings and rain story.
I was doing a job in one of thecanal estates and the whole
house is propped up byscrewpeers.
Thank God All this rain cameand the whole embankment started
to go and we actually hadexposed groupies, clients
freaking out hey, it's gonnafall over.
I can't mate.
(48:55):
You got 130, 140 screw peersunder your house.
It's not going to fall over andwe must have vacuumed those
footings three times I, I reckon.
So how much is a vac truck now?
A lot.
A lot.
So I reckon I did it threetimes.
In the end we poured blindinglayers and then it happened
again, so it was easier to vacthe blinding layer and
(49:16):
eventually I got the footing inand eventually I got retaining
wall up.
Here's the other thing.
With anxiety too, you stressand you're so wound up about one
thing.
But that one thing will getfixed.
You know, I used to stressabout my programs, my building
programs.
If it rained it'd knock me backa month and then how am I going
(49:38):
to get that month back?
And I'd get really wound upabout it.
But you know what?
I'd tick away at it, chip awayat it and eventually you'd look
back and there's that wall.
Speaker 2 (49:46):
it's built, finished yeah, well, mate, I, I, we could
definitely keep talking aboutthis, but we need to move on,
because you've got a lot ofother good stuff to share as
well.
So, um you, you work, you'reworking through all that.
Now you're on top of it, andnow you've decided to get stuck
in.
You're going to do your ownthing yeah.
Speaker 1 (50:06):
So that was that's when the psychiatrist said to me
you're not going to get rid ofit, you need to just work with
it, go and do something youreally wanted to do.
So I got myself in such a badstate too.
I hated my job, didn't want tobuild anymore, just didn't like
it.
Um, I'd lost my passion, I'dlost my fire, and I think that
(50:26):
that did also fuel the anxiety,because I didn't know what I
wanted to do.
What am I going to do that paysthis much money that I can
sustain my family?
And then I thought you knowwhat?
I've had a business registeredfor 15 years.
I've never done anything with itand my current close mate and
(50:46):
the owner of that house that youwent to the other day.
He came to me because I rentedI've rented that house twice now
.
He said I want you to renovate.
This is four years ago.
I said no, I'll get amd to doit.
He goes no, you want you to doit.
Um, and anyway, I ended updoing it.
So he said you're doing it forother people, you're good at it,
do it for yourself.
So, yeah, I decided to have ago and, to be honest, scary as
(51:11):
anything, but I love it.
Yeah, I love it.
It's a whole new challenge.
I get to choose how muchpressure I put on myself.
So if I don't pour concretetomorrow, it doesn't matter,
I'll pour it the next day.
Do you know what I mean?
So that's just an exampleyou're in control.
I'm in control of my stress andmy pressure, uh, and it's turned
out to be the way to go.
Speaker 2 (51:32):
So and then, yeah, you reached out three or four
months ago and jumped on boardwith elevate and you're, um,
you're kicking, like, you'rekicking goals with that.
Like you, you're reaching outall the time saying, man, I've
learned this.
Oh, this is fantastic.
Like so I look, mate, it reallyinspires me because and I'm more
inspired now that I know moreabout your background, because
(51:55):
and I actually think, when youwere just talking about that, I
think you actually you reachedout to me when you were tossing
up whether you should give it ago or not on your own.
It was one of the messages wehad on Instagram.
Speaker 1 (52:09):
I was very hesitant Should I do this, should I not?
And yeah, you gave me the right, the right push to do it.
Your, your program, what you do, I mean it's, it's very, it's
very.
It gives you a lot ofconfidence.
You know, and a lot of buildersout there, younger fellows,
younger than me, should jumponto it and and look into it.
(52:31):
I wish I, because a lot of thestuff that you do as well I
already know.
But when I read, you know whatyou're saying, or see what
you're doing on your podcast, itjust cements in my head.
I already know that and, okay,I'm not the only person that
thinks that that's the directionI'm going to go.
Speaker 2 (52:47):
Yeah, you're, you're surrounded like one of the most
powerful parts of of uh elevateis the community oh, the
community is unbelievable.
Speaker 1 (52:55):
I love that.
I love my band of brothers,mate, we're it's so good we just
when there's probably chats onmy phone now.
Yeah, we just talk all the timeyeah, because I'm.
Speaker 2 (53:05):
I have no doubt there's a lot of members in
elevate that have anxiety and uhyeah you're sharing this story
is definitely going to help helpthem a lot as well well, just
as I said to would be started.
Speaker 1 (53:16):
I hope someone just listens to me and you know if
it's, if they've got the samething, even remotely the same
thing going on, just yeah, juststart talking about it, look
into it so you were sayingbefore that you can pick it a
mile away.
Speaker 2 (53:31):
So like for people that are listening.
If they think there's someonein their team or one of their
contractors or something like,how would you approach it?
Speaker 1 (53:39):
um, okay, so you're talking about like.
I've been in the industry for37 years now.
I've dealt with a lot of egosmore in the last few years.
But if I go up to someone now,say a contractor walks onto my
job and they're a confidentperson, um, and I tell them, I
(54:01):
talk to them about what I'mdoing and what I want them to do
, I can pretty well judge bytheir body language.
Um, the way they look at me eyesis a big thing.
If they look you in the eyes,you know that they're going to
respect you.
If they don't, you knowstraight away they're not
interested in you.
That's how I judge that.
Um, you can usually tell to, ifyou give them a list of
(54:22):
instructions, that it ain'tfollow you.
No, they're.
They're an arrogant person or aperson that they've got a
strong personality.
They're going to do what theywant to do and they probably
don't have interest in peoplethat have an anxious nature.
Does that make sense?
Yeah, um, you can.
Normally.
You normally work it out bybody language and particularly
(54:43):
eyes.
Yeah, yeah, I'm a big advocateof that in fact, last week I met
a potential client.
This guy's well, you probablyworked out of work in the
wealthy realm.
He's got a big business inBrisbane.
He is a country boy.
I put my hand out and hedrilled my eyes.
(55:04):
I've never felt so muchintensity ever from shaking
someone's hand and being staredat.
Anyway, I got this contactthrough a mutual subcontractor.
They rang me an hour later andsaid you got the job.
He likes you, he's judged youstraight away and that would be
from that.
Yeah, that, straight away, thatcontact.
Speaker 2 (55:25):
Yeah, well, that's a lot of country people.
Country people judged by the.
Body language by when you putyour hand out to shake him.
You've got to be staring him inthe eyes, and how hard you, how
firm your handshake is and howmuch how you stare in the eyes
we um do you know what ahandshake means.
Speaker 1 (55:43):
No, you come without weapons because you've got to
put your hand out.
There's no weapon in your handso you come in peace.
Yeah, yeah, someone I think myold man told me that man years
ago.
That's how he was a wise fellayeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (55:57):
We, um, we're at the farm, uh, he might have been at
christmas time and uh, we'vejust become really good mates
with this guy out there, glenn.
That helps us look after theplace a bit and, like, I've just
learned so much off him.
He's a thoroughbred country boyand, um, we had the two girls
up there and, um, I'm not surehow it come about, but we was
(56:21):
either we were either sayinghello or saying goodbye and like
I put my hand out and gave hima handshake and I think I must
have said to the girls okay,I'll give, give glenn a
handshake, and he, um, I'm goodon you and then you, and then
they've shaken his hand.
But then he's held their hand.
He's like do you know how tolike look me in the eyes?
If you shake my hand, you'vegot to look me in the eyes.
So he's giving them a lesson onhandshaking.
Speaker 1 (56:42):
It is a very respectful thing to do.
And you ask how I judge someonethat doesn't or haven't got the
capacity to under.
It's not the capacity, but theydon't want to understand what
mental health is you just knowby their presence.
Well, I do, it's kind of hardto.
It's a hard one to answer,actually.
Yeah, they.
Speaker 2 (57:05):
There's a lot of people out there like I see it
now.
There's a lot of people outthere that as soon as you start
to talk about mental health,they roll their head down that's
, and that's the person that's.
Speaker 1 (57:16):
Well, there you go, there's.
That is that person.
Speaker 2 (57:18):
You see their face just drop yeah, or they turn
their head away, or they, they,they.
Well, like you said, they, they, they don't look at you.
Speaker 1 (57:27):
Yeah, that's um you see, they're just, they're not
focused.
Speaker 2 (57:30):
Yeah, and they're the ones you probably need to be
reaching out the most.
Speaker 1 (57:33):
Well, how I deal with that person is I am not afraid
of them.
I, straight away, then go intowell, don't really care what you
think, it's not a mental thing,it's not a competition either.
You're not trying to beat theirpersonality, you just know.
(57:58):
I know straight away, straightaway.
Well, it's a different way thatI'm going to talk to them, yeah
, and deal with them, um, butI'm not afraid of them.
One of my best mates, he's oneof those 50 percenters.
He does not believe it, hedoesn't want to know about it.
Yet he's got people around himthat have serious problems and
I've told him you need to get onboard because there's nothing
you can do to get rid of it.
It's there, yeah, but he's soarrogant about it.
That's his problem.
Speaker 2 (58:19):
It's his problem so what's next for Rybuild?
What's on the cards?
Speaker 1 (58:23):
okay.
So growing my business isprobably what is exactly where I
want to go.
We've we've started off thebusiness now and people know who
I am.
A lot of my old clients knowI'm out there.
They're telling their friends.
We've opened up a smallbusiness where we're going to
specialise in wine galleriesbecause I've done enough of them
.
Now I know how to do them.
(58:44):
Builders get them now in theirhouses.
They don't know what to do.
They think it's well.
It is actually quite astrategic process.
So we're going to offer aservice where we come in and we
build it for them and they don'thave to worry about it.
I've got contacts that supplyit, and I've just recently
opened up a development arm aswell, where a friend of mine and
I are just going to go and havea go at building stuff and
(59:06):
seeing if we can make a dollar,because I don't think you can
lose from now to the Olympics.
Speaker 2 (59:10):
Yeah, I'm the same mate In southeast Queensland.
Here it's well, I shouldn't sayyou can't, you can.
Speaker 1 (59:17):
You've got to be smart about things, oh yeah, but
but if you do Exactly, there'snot a lot.
Speaker 2 (59:22):
if you do a good product, you buy in the right
location, there's a lot of moneyto be made.
Speaker 1 (59:37):
Well, I'm lucky.
I've got a lot, of, a lot ofpeople around me that are
successful in business, a lot ofmates, uh, and now they're
they're all in their 50s andearly 60s and their businesses
run themselves.
They're looking for anotherchallenge, yeah.
So I've kind of said, hey, well, I want something to do
different.
How about we go together?
So I've lined that up.
Yeah, um, and I think I've gotthis is I've kind of considered
I might, I might have adhd.
I said this to my kids theother day and I laughed.
(59:58):
I said, dad, it's a given mate,what do you want to get told by
a doctor?
But I just want to know,because I have a lot of trouble
concentrating and I think italso contributes to the anxiety.
So that's the next step getthat under control.
Yeah, uh, yeah, and then justparticularly grow my business.
Really no good on you, mate.
Look to the anxiety.
Speaker 2 (01:00:14):
So that's the next step get that under control,
yeah, yeah, and then justparticularly grow my business
really Well, good on you, mate.
Look, I take my hat off to you.
I appreciate you coming onhaving a chat.
Speaker 1 (01:00:20):
No worries.
Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
I definitely think that you've touched a lot of
people by putting this out thereand telling your story.
So, mate, how can people get intouch with you that they want
to reach out to you telling yourstory?
So, mate, how can people get intouch with you that they?
Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
want to reach out to you Email or just if they jump
online and look up Rybuild it'sry underscore build on Insta and
just DM me there and I'll getback to them, or they can get me
on robertrybuildcomau.
Speaker 2 (01:00:46):
Yeah, awesome mate.
Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
But yeah, I'm there to help.
If anyone wants to know how Idid it, I'm happy to have a chat
.
Speaker 2 (01:00:51):
But yeah, I'm there to help.
If anyone wants to know how Idid it, I'm happy to have a chat
.
Yeah, awesome.
Well, like I said, I definitelyappreciate you sharing your
story.
It's huge and it's going tohelp some people.
So, guys, look, if you'veenjoyed this podcast and, yeah,
you want to share it with yourfriends or whatever, make sure
you like, share, subscribe allthose things and, yeah, we'll
see you on the next one.
Speaker 1 (01:01:16):
Are you ready to build smarter, live better and
enjoy life?
Then head over to live likebuildcom forward slash elevate
to get started.
Speaker 4 (01:01:26):
Everything discussed during the level up podcast with
me, duane pierce, is basedsolely on my own personal
experiences and thoseexperiences of my guests.
The information, opinions andrecommendations presented in
this podcast are for generalinformation only, and any
reliance on the informationprovided in this podcast is done
at your own risk.
We recommend that you obtainyour own professional advice in
(01:01:49):
respect to the topics discussedduring this podcast.
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