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April 11, 2025 • 17 mins

What happens when 54% of churchgoers secretly battle pornography while churches remain silent? This eye-opening episode tackles the epidemic of pornography affecting 75% of Christian men and brings crucial conversations out of the shadows. We explore the power of accountability as your breakthrough secret weapon. When isolation breeds addiction, connection creates transformation. Discover how vulnerability becomes your pathway to freedom when you stop hiding and start healing. The journey to purity isn't walked alone - find out how the right accountability partnerships provide the encouragement, prayer, and honest feedback that make lasting change possible.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Chris Grainger (00:03):
Welcome to the Lion Within Us, a podcast
serving Christian men who arehungry to be the leaders God
intends you to be.
I'm your host, chris Granger.
Let's jump in.
All right, fellas, on Fridaytime, I don't know, I'm just
pumped up, let's go.
Okay, so we're in the book ofPhilippians this week, guys,
chapter 3, verse 7.
But whatever were gains to me,I now consider loss.

(00:23):
For the sake of Christ.
Beautiful little verse rightthere to Philippians Go back,
listen to the spiritual kickoff,unpack that at length to help
you simplify and apply that toyour life.
And then the last episode, guys.
That's where I had our friend,nick Stumbo, on really unpacking
the dangers of pornography, howto address it.
What does a pure life look like?
How you can be equipped if youhave.
Maybe you're struggling withpornography in your life and you

(00:45):
don't know how to address it.
You don't know where to start.
Okay, we'll give you someinsights here.
Maybe you're thinking aboutokay, maybe I need to talk to my
wife about this and actually goahead and just bring it out.
Before you do that, listen tothat conversation.
I'm not saying don't do that,I'm just saying get equipped
right.
Get equipped first so thatyou'll be ready to have that

(01:07):
conversation in a meaningful way, because if you just go to her
and you just dump all this stuffon her, you just confess
everything, she may not be readyto handle all that.
So you need to be to getprepared, and Nick and I went
through some tremendous stepsthat you can take to equip
yourself or equip others to beable to combat this pornography
issue head on.

(01:27):
And we know it's such a bigdeal.
75% of guys, 50 somethingpercent of girls, it ended up
being like 52% overall.
54% overall people Christiansin the church who are struggling
with pornography.
Now you tell me that's that.
And then you walk into a churchand basically just split it in
half.
It's like, okay, this halfisn't, this half is right, and

(01:50):
just start thinking about that.
And then, not to mention,churches aren't equipped.
They don't know how to havethese conversations, they're
just not doing it.
Pastors, run from this stuff.
We can't run anymore.
We just cannot run anymore.
We've got to lean in.
If they're not going to getequipped, then we're going to
equip you.
This is what the land within usis all about.

(02:10):
We're going to help lean intothese hard conversations, these
hard areas that you need helpwith.
The one pastor I know thattalks about this stuff pretty
openly is Pastor Joby Martin.
He's one of the rare diamondsin the rough who talks about
this stuff.
It helps you understand abiblical stance on what this
means, how we can move forward.

(02:32):
So I really enjoyed theconversation with Nick and
hopefully you will too.
So go back and check that oneout.
Okay, all right For our funFriday.
Guys, you know what we do.
We're going to do a health,wealth and a self tip.
Okay, the line within us isabout those three pillars.
Health is how do we buildstronger minds and bodies?
Because it's not just aboutbeing physically fit, but we
have to be mentally fit as well.
Okay.
Wealth is all about stewardshipbeing better stewards of our

(02:55):
finances in general as well asour careers.
So we'll mix some stuff in.
Now.
The selfip is what can we do toequip ourselves to be more
effective husbands and fathersGot to be both.
Maybe you're not a father.
We talk about lots of tips thatare just being better husbands.

(03:15):
Okay.
Now, from a health tip, and lotsof these things are really tied
into this idea of breaking freefrom these destructive habits.
Health tip I'm just going tokeep this one super simple.
You got to have someaccountability in your life.
You just do, because that isthe key to breakthrough.
If you have destructivetendencies or habits, yes, you

(03:36):
need a support system, and thatisolation is the enemy of
excellence.
You guys heard me say that overand over and over, and anytime
you isolate, that's just like abreeding ground for addiction.
Accountability is where itbreaks the cycle.
It just does.
Maybe it's a mentor or friendor a community like the Lion
Within Us who will help you,journey alongside you in that

(04:00):
whole pursuit of purity, ofbreaking free, because what that
accountability partner can dofor you guys is what we find in
our discipleship masterminds.
We see this all the time.
You'll find that encouragement.
You'll also find prayer anddirect and honest feedback
that's going to help you staylocked in on your goals, because

(04:22):
there's so many tools out therethat you can use.
But I'm telling you, if youjust lean in and use tools like
the Lionel Dennis aroundaccountability, it's going to be
right there to be ready toequip you.
Because if you confess thosestruggles the way James tells us
to, you're going to find thatGod's grace is going to start
flowing and that's going to bepart of the healing process,
because accountability doggoneit is not a sign of weakness,

(04:47):
it's a step forward towardsstrength and restoration and we
have to know that, we have tobelieve that.
We have to cling to that.
Then we have to seek that inour life.
I also just want to say lots ofpeople you know want to talk
about accountability, want togive accountability, but no one
wants to receive it.
Right, just be real for asecond.

(05:07):
Can't be that way.
You're going to be a leaderdoing what God's called you to
do.
You got to have people in yourlife that are holding your feet
to the fire.
Just do it, or else nothing'sgoing to get done.
All right Now, wealth tip thisis more of a moral thing to

(05:28):
consider here as you moveforward with your finances.
But integrity the integrity youhave as a man is non-negotiable.
Okay, your work is an extensionof your faith, totally get.
You should know that by now.
So you better not compromiseany integrity at work.
I'm telling you this.
When I did this in my past, itjust blew up every time.

(05:50):
Okay, this could be.
This is what this could looklike, fellas, let's see if this
stuff resonates.
Dishonesty, just not lying.
How about cutting corners.
Okay, how about this one?
You tolerate unethical behavior.
I mean, let's just be real.
There's lots of unethicalbehavior.

(06:11):
I used to be a big part of itinside our break room, outside,
on our shop floor, guys wouldpull up stuff and guys would
talk about stuff or show mepictures of stuff and stuff I
shouldn't see.
Let's be real.
I didn't say anything about it.
Not doing something is, ineffect, doing something, fellas,

(06:33):
and the Colossians is right andwe believe it to be true.
Whatever you do, work heartilyas for the Lord and not for man.
No-transcript.
You know, we can't, guys, Ican't even express this enough.
You have to be extremelydiligent around what you

(06:57):
tolerate and what you allow infrom a content standpoint or
distractions.
Okay, that stuff doesn't honorGod, fellas.
You can't allow it.
You can't allow it.
You have to strive to make yourworkplace the place that you're
earning your career, yourministry, where Christ is

(07:19):
driving every one of yourdecisions, and integrity, fellas
, kind of going back to the mainthing, this is how you have to
lead, and when you do that, youhonor God, you inspire others
and you build a legacy thatlasts long beyond.
When you do that, you honor God, you inspire others and you
build a legacy that lasts longbeyond when you stop collecting
paychecks at this organization.
No, you're making a biggerimpact.

(07:39):
So just keep that in mind.
Maybe do a littleself-reflection today.
Where are you compromising yourintegrity at work and what are
you going to do to self-correctthat?
All right, now self-tip, kindof go to the home front you need
to be focusing on, or youshould be building, a fortress

(08:01):
of trust inside your home.
Let's just be real.
Home should be sanctuary, safeplace where you can kick your
shoes off, sit back, chill out.
It should not be a place wherepeople are on edge, and you do
this by creating vulnerabilityand growth through open

(08:23):
communication about thechallenges that we all face in
life.
So maybe you need to initiatesome conversations, as nick and
I talked about, about technologyor temptations or just hey,
what's been going on lately youthink you want to talk about,
because if you know, rather ifyour people on your house know,

(08:43):
that they can come to you aboutanything and they ain't gonna
get some big judgment speech, no, or you can project your ideals
on them.
You're just gonna going toactually listen, bro.
You realize that's going to dofor you.
It's going to open upconversations and opportunities
you've never dreamed aboutbefore.
It's going to help you createsome boundaries right, that will

(09:06):
be in place, for that willactually be leaned into, because
the conversations you've hadbuilt up to that point, and if
you lean in to building atrust-filled home, you're
equipping your family directlyto fight the world's challenges.
You just are, and you're doingit by keeping Christ at the

(09:31):
center.
But see, I can't do this foryou, no one can do this for you.
You can't outsource it, fellas.
Unfortunately, it has to be allon you.
You can't hire some dude tocome in and build trust in your
home.
No, bro, that's your job, yougot to do that.
So how are you going to standup or start showing up, rather

(09:54):
to be that leader that theydesperately need you to be?
So hopefully, those three tipshelped this week, fellas Health,
wealth, self.
That health you need thataccountability, let's just be
real.
You need that accountability tobuild a stronger mind as well
as a stronger body.
Wealth tip you need to rememberthat.
Integrity, that's anon-negotiable.
And that self tip build thatfortress of trust at your home.

(10:15):
Okay, all right.
Book of the week, guys, this isone of Nick's books I definitely
want to bring it up.
It's called Setting Us Free AnUnexpected Journey of Grace, by
Nick.
Again, it talks a lot about hisstruggles and things he went
through with pornography, how italmost ruined his marriage and
completely wrecked it.
It was a 10-year journeyworking through this with his
wife and he was very open andtransparent about it.

(10:35):
But, guys, lots and lots ofinsights in here that can help
set you free no-transcript, andyou don't know the steps to take
to move forward.
This is a great, great resourcefor you.
So you can go tothelionwithinus, check on the
free tools and then you'll findBook of the Week.

(10:57):
It's all right there.
It's a great way to add to yourlibrary.
Okay, all right.
So dad jokes let's get into ourdad jokes, fellas.
First dad joke this week is whydon't fish ever get caught up
in some shady business?
Hmm, well, because they alwayskeep their scales balanced.
All right, I know that got afew eye rolls.

(11:17):
Okay, don't shoot me.
That's just I deliver it right.
Number two why was the calendaralways stressed out?
Because it always because itfelt like it was on too many
dates.
There you go, fellas.
I don't know.
Number one, number one, numbertwo maybe they both aren't good
this week.
Don't shoot me, just hey.
If you got some good ones, sendthose in to support at the line

(11:39):
within that us, okay?
The number one is why don'tfish ever get caught up in shady
business?
Because they always keep theirscales balanced.
And number two, why was thecalendars always stressed out?
Because it felt like it was ontoo many dates.
I don don't know.
The more you say them, thefunnier it gets.
Maybe this is a couple you justneed to say a few times over and
over and over, okay, but anyway, fellas, question of the week
this week is what are youclinging to that?

(12:00):
God is calling you to surrender, and I know so many guys out
there.
There's something, there'ssomething in our life that we're
holding on to, maybe withsomething in our life that we're
holding on to, maybe with thosefingernail grip, I'm just
encouraging you guys.
Whatever that is, if it'sdrawing, if it's pulling you
away from Christ, we have to bebold and courageous enough to
surrender it.
Just surrender it to Him andlet the power of Christ remove

(12:25):
that from you.
So, fellas, if you need helpwith that I can't emphasize this
enough Go to thelionwithinus,click over.
I'm going to go here right nowand tell you exactly how to do
it.
Offerings the very first thingunder offerings is Lion's Den
Community.
You click that, okay?
And when you click that, it'sgoing to take you to a page

(12:47):
where you can join our community.
Get started today.
Take you to a page where youcan join our community.
Get started today.
You're going to find a group ofmen who are here helping each
other grow to be the leadersthat God intends us to be.
You're also going to find abunch of sinners who haven't
figured this thing out yet, whoare striving every day to get
better, who have lots ofquestions, who need support,

(13:07):
need a safe place, want to askthese questions in an
environment where they're notgoing to feel judged.
Guys, this is what we've built.
We have our discipleshipmastermind groups.
We have our Friday Forge, wehave our Lion Lunches.
We have our Bible studies.
Guys, can you see Couplesnights, all the things that
we've built to help you lean inand just truly be that leader

(13:29):
that God intends you to be, in asafe environment with no
judgment, no condemnation.
So, again, thelionwithinus clickon offerings.
Drop down the very first oneLion's Den Community.
Get started today.
All right, guys have a greatweekend.
Thank you so much for listening.
If you have any questions, ifwe can support you in any way,
please, please, please, reachout.

(13:50):
We're here to support.
We're here to support, we'rehere to serve, we're here to
help.
We can't do that if you do notbring it to us.
So again, it's thelionwithinus.
If you click on the free toolsas well, you get the weekly roar
, the Christian leaderassessment, our Bible reading
plans Again, the book of theweek that we talk about, the
podcast, guys, articles, allthat stuff, fun, fun, fun stuff.
All the stuff's there for atyour disposal, guys.

(14:12):
Once you lean in, once you'regoing to take advantage of that
stuff, you can go ahead andstart using some of that to grow
as the leader that God isdefinitely calling you to be.
All right, guys, get after it.
Have a great weekend.
Thank you so much for listeningand remember to keep unleashing
the lion within.

(14:35):
I don't know about you, but Iused to find Mondays really
rough.
I would find myself trying toreset for work, trying to get my
bearing on the family calendar,trying to find time for my own
spiritual growth and development, and often I found myself
overwhelmed or just flatlyignoring aspects of my life that
I know are meaningful to me.
What I learned was that if I hadimmediate access to important

(14:58):
and impactful spiritual topicsand reflections to start my week
well, after the allure of aSunday sermon has passed, I
would set my whole week up to bemore meaningful and for the
opportunity to make a trueimpact.
If you think that getting sucha boost would help your week to
get started on the right foot,we would love for you to sign up

(15:19):
for the Weekly Roar, which isour newsletter that is produced
by the Lion Within Us.
Each week will deliver apowerful reflection and
practical steps to help youapply Scripture with clarity and
purpose, all being rooted inlight and truth.
So in just a few minutes, wehope to arm you with insights

(15:42):
for living out biblicalleadership with confidence and
strength, and maybe even have alittle extra bounce in your step
.
If that sounds sounds useful,head over to thelionwithinus
slash ROAR to sign up today.
That's thelionwithinus slashROAR to get your weekly ROAR

(16:04):
today.
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