January 26, 2024 • 14 mins
Ever felt like your imperfections are glaringly front and center? This episode is a heartening reminder that through those very flaws, the warmth of divine love and human connection can shine brightest. I'm Lisa Barry, and I'll regale you with stories where imperfection and loss give way to beauty and laughter. You'll hear about a bride's precious remembrance of her father on her wedding day and chuckle along with my dinner party disaster - damp chairs and all! Plus, I've got whimsical tips to keep your spirits buoyant through the gloom of winter, from Christmas lights that linger to the bright promise of happy lamps.
Eric Arnold, CEO and father to four dynamic kids advocates for a counterintuitive approach to parenting: teaching children the value of failure. Drawing from Eric's personal odyssey of career pitfalls that paved his path to success, we examine the indispensable lessons learned from setbacks. Discover how embracing the unexpected twists and turns of life can lead to growth, and why sometimes, the best way forward involves a step back. So, grab your favorite mug of coffee, and let's connect over these life-affirming insights.
Click here to hear The Lisa Barry Show on your computer or smartphone. Pick the times that work for you.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lisa Barry (00:02):
Hi, it's Lisa Barry.
You're welcome to the LisaBarry Show podcast, where I
share highlights from my radioshow during the week.
And some of the things you'llhear are I don't know what God
thinks of you, how to figure outwhat to say when you have no
idea what to say, and the beef Ihave with Neil Diamond.
And if you'd like to figure outhow to hear the show on the
(00:23):
radio, I'll tell you at the veryend.
Stick around.
Hey, there, it's Lisa Berry.
I've got a question.
Have you ever wondered how Godfeels about you?
You try to do the right thingmost days, but you also know
you're inconsistent.
You lose your temper, you'vegot a few bad habits that you
just can't shake and you thinkif God grades on a curve, you're
(00:46):
maybe at a C.
But now let me ask you thishave you ever had one of your
kids surprise you with breakfastin bed when they were about
four years old?
This is probably what went down.
You heard a lot of clanking andcrashing in the kitchen, then
little footsteps coming up thestairs and they walk into your
(01:10):
room, unable to hide their sheerdelight with this brilliant
idea.
When the tray gets to you, younotice that the toast is burnt
to a crisp and on top of that alukewarm egg white that's still
clear in spots, and then there'sthe orange juice that spilled
(01:30):
over onto the tray, because youknow well it's hard to balance.
Coming upstairs Now, when yourchild presented you the worst
breakfast in the history ofbreakfasts, what did you say?
Did you point out the disaster?
Not a chance, because you knewthe heart that made the offering
was genuine, the effort wasstellar and the outcome
(01:55):
irrelevant.
You took that little face inyour hands and you kissed those
chubby cheeks that tasted likemaple syrup and you said this is
the best breakfast I have everhad.
I can't believe you did thisfor me.
Okay, now that is how God feelsabout you.
(02:16):
Death has the worst timing,isn't it?
Hey, there it's Lisa Berry.
It makes you rearrangeeverything.
You have to rewrite the future.
You have to get out your eraserand erase that person out of
anything that you hoped theywould be a part of.
(02:37):
Natalie felt that because shewas getting married in a few
months and her dad had passedaway the year before and she
always thought that he wouldwalk her down the aisle.
So there she is being a goodsport, she's trying on her dress
and all of a sudden she feltsomething kind of scratchy by
her ankle, and so she lifted upthe hem of her dress and started
(02:58):
looking around.
And pretty soon she sees thisblue heart made of fabric sewn
into the inside of the dress.
And her mom said honey, that'syour something blue.
She looked at it and it said Ilove you, natalie.
Daddy, she burst into tears.
She's like Mom.
How did you do this, natalie?
(03:20):
Mom had taken something he hadwritten in your yearbook, had
that transferred onto one of hisblue t-shirts and then cut out
the shape of a heart.
You know, I feel like that'swhat God does for you and me.
He's not going to preventeverything sad from happening in
our lives, but he can make itspecial and meaningful, and that
(03:43):
is one of the bajillion reasonsI fall on Jesus.
Hey, there it's.
Lisa Berry.
You know how, when you havepeople over, you want everything
to go perfect.
You don't want any catastrophes.
Well, you know, it alwayshappens, right?
Maybe you had guests over toyour house over the weekend.
(04:04):
We did too Well.
In anticipation of companycoming over, a few days ago, my
husband used some upholsterycleaner on the chairs when they
looked marvelous.
Well, we're eating and likethree quarters of the way
through the meal, I realize Ithink my chairs wet.
I think I'm wet and so Inonchalantly ask everybody okay,
(04:27):
by the way, is anybody's chairwet?
Two out of the three said no,but one said actually I think it
is here once again.
The hostess with the most isnow has one of her guests trying
to figure out how he's going todry his pants.
Now see, I tell you thesethings so you either know what
happened to you wasn't that bad,or you have company on the wall
(04:50):
of shame.
Did you hear about the guy whowent to the doctor because he
had a skin rash?
The doctor ran a few tests andsaid I know what the problem is.
You're allergic to your dog.
After his exam was over, theguy's walking out and the doctor
(05:11):
says well, are you going togive your dog away or sell it?
The guy said no, I'm going toget another opinion.
It's a lot easier to find adoctor than it is to find a good
hunting dog.
Oh my god, I laughed becauseyou know what.
That's the way I read the Biblesometimes, like, if I don't like
what one verse says, well, I'lljust go find another verse that
(05:32):
it's more palatable.
You know, in this year of 2024,I don't want to be the one
that's going to hunt for theverse that I want, because if we
do that, neither of us aregoing to grow.
But I know one thing listeningto these songs really helps.
One of my friends maybe feelsthe way you do.
She said is work fun?
No, but does it pay the bills?
(05:53):
Also no.
Do you know?
There's one city in Alaska thatin the winter months has 67 days
of darkness, like the sun justdoes not come up for that many
days.
Wouldn't you think it would beso depressing?
I would have a hard time withthat.
But actually the people thereare quite happy.
(06:14):
They keep their Christmaslights up until the end of
January, they eat vitamin D andthey use those happy lamps.
So you know what you just gotto have a strategy.
So if winter is getting alittle too long for you, just
make a little list two, three,four things about what would
make it more tolerable for you.
Now there's a fun project.
(06:38):
If today you're in one of thosedownward spirals of anxiety and
you're wondering why, you knowwhat somebody said to me God's
not in a hurry, you are.
It's why you're tired, it's whyyou're anxious, it's why you're
frustrated, stressed anddisappointed.
Hmm, that's something to thinkabout.
You know what's cool God lovesyou simply because he chose to.
(07:04):
Others might abandon you,divorce you, ignore you, but God
will love you always, no matterwhat.
So remember that friend I toldyou about a little while ago,
whose husband passed away just afew months ago, and people keep
telling her she's strong andshe wants to say back to them
(07:25):
which she doesn't, but she'slike I'm not strong.
This happened to me and I haveno control over it and I don't
feel strong at all.
So I asked her.
I said well, instead of that,what is something that would be
helpful for people to say?
And you know what she respondedand said I think I get the most
comfort right now being toldthat God is with me.
I think any kind words are nice, but people don't know what to
(07:48):
say, so they're silent andthat's actually worse.
I'm just feeling very aloneright now.
So being reminded that God iswith me is nice.
About to tell you could be themost important thing you hear
today.
Hey, there, it's Lisa Berry.
So yesterday I told you about myfriend, lisa, whose husband
passed away three months ago andshe wishes people wouldn't tell
her she's strong, because shesaid I'm not strong, I'm just
(08:12):
surviving in a situation that Ihave no control over.
But then her Facebook friend,jessica, said this strength
isn't always a confident bravery.
Strength is showering, eating,doing house chores and caring
for your pets, despiteeverything in you that wishes
life would just give you a break.
(08:33):
Strength is shoveling yourdriveway in tears.
There are so many ways you canexude strength in spite of the
heartbreak you weren't given achoice in.
I know the pain is immeasurable, but I assure you you're doing
so much better than you giveyourself credit for.
Strength is the way youcontinue to show up for yourself
(08:57):
every day, while trusting Godhas plans of happiness and grace
in store for you.
Hey, there, I'm Lisa Berry.
I'm not sure if this everhappens to you, but I was
telling my friend about thisquote that I had taken a picture
of and I had it on mysmartphone and I was like just a
minute, let me find it, I'llfind it here.
And then I'm scrolling with mythumb, scrolling, scrolling like
(09:20):
two hours later Not quite, butit felt like that.
It's like I can't find it.
So I just thought, if you havethat same thing too, you know
what we could do this weekend.
That's Uber productive.
Put a lot of those pictures inalbums on our phones.
It's going to make stuff somuch easier to find.
(09:41):
Did you know Neil Diamond justcelebrated a birthday?
You know how old he is?
What would you guess If youguessed 83, you're right, that's
an older, I guess, than I wouldhave thought.
Isn't it funny how his songSweet Caroline has become iconic
.
It's at all wedding receptions,it's in all major stadiums, but
(10:04):
there's only one beef I wouldhave with him, I guess, if I had
to be honest.
I feel like his songs were likethis I don't know if I want to
talk or sing and I can't decide,so I'll do both.
(10:25):
Here's me last night.
Does this ever happen to you?
I'm like good night brain.
A few minutes later, my brainresponds what disease do you
think we have?
You may be trying to eathealthier by juicing.
I took raw carrot and kale andginger and lime and celery and
juiced it all.
Gave one to my husband and oneto me.
You know what my husband does.
(10:46):
He goes to the fridge, takes acan of whipped cream and, yep,
he did.
Hey, there it's, lisa Berry.
So think about the times whenpeople ask you to do something
Maybe be involved in a committeeor to help out in the
children's nursery my firstreaction is inner turmoil.
(11:07):
Do you do that too?
Because on the one hand, myschedule is already very busy,
but on the other hand, a lot ofpeople say no and somebody's got
to do it.
So here's this person standingin front of me waiting for my
answer, and here's me, dear inthe headlights, because I'm
trying to come up with the bestanswer.
I don't have one.
(11:29):
It's like I really want to sayno, but I really should say yes.
But then I learned about threequestions Lisa Turkers asked
herself before saying yes toanything that she's asked to do.
Number one would I be sayingyes to prove something?
Number two am I saying yes toimpress someone?
(11:49):
And number three have I countthe cost of saying yes?
Those are so good.
No more deer in the headlights.
Well, here's a little bit offinancial advice.
I learned by personalexperience If you want to be
financially stable, don't getinto crafts the end.
(12:12):
I'm not sure if you've seenthis picture or not, but it's of
a huge eagles nest completelycovered in snow, and right in
the center there's the eagleshead, and the eagle is sitting
patiently keeping the eggs warmup to its neck in snow, not
complaining, not flying away toa more comfortable situation,
(12:34):
yet probably very aware of howuncomfortable this situation is.
That's parenting.
That's what you do.
You could choose greenerpastures if you wanted to.
You could put your foot downand say that's enough, I'm
working too hard, but you don't.
You're mindful of yourresponsibility and you don't
complain, even when it's hard.
Good on you.
(12:59):
Is it really believable that adad would want his kids to fail?
Are you kidding me?
Hey there, lisa Berry.
Well, here's a dad.
His name is Eric Arnold.
He's a father of four and a CEOof a financial planning
business.
He really wants his kids tofail.
You know why he said becausewithout all the failures in his
(13:20):
life, he would never be CEOtoday.
So here's a post that he shared.
He goes I failed at ninestartups, got fired from two
companies, quit three jobswithout notice, failed out of
college, lost a ton of money ona bad investment.
Let me be clear those memoriesdon't fade.
If you'd like to listen to myradio show, there's a lot of
different ways you can do it.
I can raise millions intoBerryShowcom.
(13:42):
Click on how to Listen andwhile you're there, you might
even discover how I could buyyou a cup of coffee.
Thanks for listening.
This program, yay).
Hi, it's Lisa Barry.
You're welcome to the LisaBarry Show podcast, where I
share highlights from my radioshow during the week.
And some of the things you'llhear are I don't know what God
thinks of you, how to figure outwhat to say when you have no
idea what to say, and the beef Ihave with Neil Diamond.
And if you'd like to figure outhow to hear the show on the
(00:23):
radio, I'll tell you at the veryend.
Stick around.
Hey, there, it's Lisa Berry.
I've got a question.
Have you ever wondered how Godfeels about you?
You try to do the right thingmost days, but you also know
you're inconsistent.
You lose your temper, you'vegot a few bad habits that you
just can't shake and you thinkif God grades on a curve, you're
(00:46):
maybe at a C.
But now let me ask you thishave you ever had one of your
kids surprise you with breakfastin bed when they were about
four years old?
This is probably what went down.
You heard a lot of clanking andcrashing in the kitchen, then
little footsteps coming up thestairs and they walk into your
(01:10):
room, unable to hide their sheerdelight with this brilliant
idea.
When the tray gets to you, younotice that the toast is burnt
to a crisp and on top of that alukewarm egg white that's still
clear in spots, and then there'sthe orange juice that spilled
(01:30):
over onto the tray, because youknow well it's hard to balance.
Coming upstairs Now, when yourchild presented you the worst
breakfast in the history ofbreakfasts, what did you say?
Did you point out the disaster?
Not a chance, because you knewthe heart that made the offering
was genuine, the effort wasstellar and the outcome
(01:55):
irrelevant.
You took that little face inyour hands and you kissed those
chubby cheeks that tasted likemaple syrup and you said this is
the best breakfast I have everhad.
I can't believe you did thisfor me.
Okay, now that is how God feelsabout you.
(02:16):
Death has the worst timing,isn't it?
Hey, there it's Lisa Berry.
It makes you rearrangeeverything.
You have to rewrite the future.
You have to get out your eraserand erase that person out of
anything that you hoped theywould be a part of.
(02:37):
Natalie felt that because shewas getting married in a few
months and her dad had passedaway the year before and she
always thought that he wouldwalk her down the aisle.
So there she is being a goodsport, she's trying on her dress
and all of a sudden she feltsomething kind of scratchy by
her ankle, and so she lifted upthe hem of her dress and started
(02:58):
looking around.
And pretty soon she sees thisblue heart made of fabric sewn
into the inside of the dress.
And her mom said honey, that'syour something blue.
She looked at it and it said Ilove you, natalie.
Daddy, she burst into tears.
She's like Mom.
How did you do this, natalie?
(03:20):
Mom had taken something he hadwritten in your yearbook, had
that transferred onto one of hisblue t-shirts and then cut out
the shape of a heart.
You know, I feel like that'swhat God does for you and me.
He's not going to preventeverything sad from happening in
our lives, but he can make itspecial and meaningful, and that
(03:43):
is one of the bajillion reasonsI fall on Jesus.
Hey, there it's.
Lisa Berry.
You know how, when you havepeople over, you want everything
to go perfect.
You don't want any catastrophes.
Well, you know, it alwayshappens, right?
Maybe you had guests over toyour house over the weekend.
(04:04):
We did too Well.
In anticipation of companycoming over, a few days ago, my
husband used some upholsterycleaner on the chairs when they
looked marvelous.
Well, we're eating and likethree quarters of the way
through the meal, I realize Ithink my chairs wet.
I think I'm wet and so Inonchalantly ask everybody okay,
(04:27):
by the way, is anybody's chairwet?
Two out of the three said no,but one said actually I think it
is here once again.
The hostess with the most isnow has one of her guests trying
to figure out how he's going todry his pants.
Now see, I tell you thesethings so you either know what
happened to you wasn't that bad,or you have company on the wall
(04:50):
of shame.
Did you hear about the guy whowent to the doctor because he
had a skin rash?
The doctor ran a few tests andsaid I know what the problem is.
You're allergic to your dog.
After his exam was over, theguy's walking out and the doctor
(05:11):
says well, are you going togive your dog away or sell it?
The guy said no, I'm going toget another opinion.
It's a lot easier to find adoctor than it is to find a good
hunting dog.
Oh my god, I laughed becauseyou know what.
That's the way I read the Biblesometimes, like, if I don't like
what one verse says, well, I'lljust go find another verse that
(05:32):
it's more palatable.
You know, in this year of 2024,I don't want to be the one
that's going to hunt for theverse that I want, because if we
do that, neither of us aregoing to grow.
But I know one thing listeningto these songs really helps.
One of my friends maybe feelsthe way you do.
She said is work fun?
No, but does it pay the bills?
(05:53):
Also no.
Do you know?
There's one city in Alaska thatin the winter months has 67 days
of darkness, like the sun justdoes not come up for that many
days.
Wouldn't you think it would beso depressing?
I would have a hard time withthat.
But actually the people thereare quite happy.
(06:14):
They keep their Christmaslights up until the end of
January, they eat vitamin D andthey use those happy lamps.
So you know what you just gotto have a strategy.
So if winter is getting alittle too long for you, just
make a little list two, three,four things about what would
make it more tolerable for you.
Now there's a fun project.
(06:38):
If today you're in one of thosedownward spirals of anxiety and
you're wondering why, you knowwhat somebody said to me God's
not in a hurry, you are.
It's why you're tired, it's whyyou're anxious, it's why you're
frustrated, stressed anddisappointed.
Hmm, that's something to thinkabout.
You know what's cool God lovesyou simply because he chose to.
(07:04):
Others might abandon you,divorce you, ignore you, but God
will love you always, no matterwhat.
So remember that friend I toldyou about a little while ago,
whose husband passed away just afew months ago, and people keep
telling her she's strong andshe wants to say back to them
(07:25):
which she doesn't, but she'slike I'm not strong.
This happened to me and I haveno control over it and I don't
feel strong at all.
So I asked her.
I said well, instead of that,what is something that would be
helpful for people to say?
And you know what she respondedand said I think I get the most
comfort right now being toldthat God is with me.
I think any kind words are nice, but people don't know what to
(07:48):
say, so they're silent andthat's actually worse.
I'm just feeling very aloneright now.
So being reminded that God iswith me is nice.
About to tell you could be themost important thing you hear
today.
Hey, there, it's Lisa Berry.
So yesterday I told you about myfriend, lisa, whose husband
passed away three months ago andshe wishes people wouldn't tell
her she's strong, because shesaid I'm not strong, I'm just
(08:12):
surviving in a situation that Ihave no control over.
But then her Facebook friend,jessica, said this strength
isn't always a confident bravery.
Strength is showering, eating,doing house chores and caring
for your pets, despiteeverything in you that wishes
life would just give you a break.
(08:33):
Strength is shoveling yourdriveway in tears.
There are so many ways you canexude strength in spite of the
heartbreak you weren't given achoice in.
I know the pain is immeasurable, but I assure you you're doing
so much better than you giveyourself credit for.
Strength is the way youcontinue to show up for yourself
(08:57):
every day, while trusting Godhas plans of happiness and grace
in store for you.
Hey, there, I'm Lisa Berry.
I'm not sure if this everhappens to you, but I was
telling my friend about thisquote that I had taken a picture
of and I had it on mysmartphone and I was like just a
minute, let me find it, I'llfind it here.
And then I'm scrolling with mythumb, scrolling, scrolling like
(09:20):
two hours later Not quite, butit felt like that.
It's like I can't find it.
So I just thought, if you havethat same thing too, you know
what we could do this weekend.
That's Uber productive.
Put a lot of those pictures inalbums on our phones.
It's going to make stuff somuch easier to find.
(09:41):
Did you know Neil Diamond justcelebrated a birthday?
You know how old he is?
What would you guess If youguessed 83, you're right, that's
an older, I guess, than I wouldhave thought.
Isn't it funny how his songSweet Caroline has become iconic
.
It's at all wedding receptions,it's in all major stadiums, but
(10:04):
there's only one beef I wouldhave with him, I guess, if I had
to be honest.
I feel like his songs were likethis I don't know if I want to
talk or sing and I can't decide,so I'll do both.
(10:25):
Here's me last night.
Does this ever happen to you?
I'm like good night brain.
A few minutes later, my brainresponds what disease do you
think we have?
You may be trying to eathealthier by juicing.
I took raw carrot and kale andginger and lime and celery and
juiced it all.
Gave one to my husband and oneto me.
You know what my husband does.
(10:46):
He goes to the fridge, takes acan of whipped cream and, yep,
he did.
Hey, there it's, lisa Berry.
So think about the times whenpeople ask you to do something
Maybe be involved in a committeeor to help out in the
children's nursery my firstreaction is inner turmoil.
(11:07):
Do you do that too?
Because on the one hand, myschedule is already very busy,
but on the other hand, a lot ofpeople say no and somebody's got
to do it.
So here's this person standingin front of me waiting for my
answer, and here's me, dear inthe headlights, because I'm
trying to come up with the bestanswer.
I don't have one.
(11:29):
It's like I really want to sayno, but I really should say yes.
But then I learned about threequestions Lisa Turkers asked
herself before saying yes toanything that she's asked to do.
Number one would I be sayingyes to prove something?
Number two am I saying yes toimpress someone?
(11:49):
And number three have I countthe cost of saying yes?
Those are so good.
No more deer in the headlights.
Well, here's a little bit offinancial advice.
I learned by personalexperience If you want to be
financially stable, don't getinto crafts the end.
(12:12):
I'm not sure if you've seenthis picture or not, but it's of
a huge eagles nest completelycovered in snow, and right in
the center there's the eagleshead, and the eagle is sitting
patiently keeping the eggs warmup to its neck in snow, not
complaining, not flying away toa more comfortable situation,
(12:34):
yet probably very aware of howuncomfortable this situation is.
That's parenting.
That's what you do.
You could choose greenerpastures if you wanted to.
You could put your foot downand say that's enough, I'm
working too hard, but you don't.
You're mindful of yourresponsibility and you don't
complain, even when it's hard.
Good on you.
(12:59):
Is it really believable that adad would want his kids to fail?
Are you kidding me?
Hey there, lisa Berry.
Well, here's a dad.
His name is Eric Arnold.
He's a father of four and a CEOof a financial planning
business.
He really wants his kids tofail.
You know why he said becausewithout all the failures in his
(13:20):
life, he would never be CEOtoday.
So here's a post that he shared.
He goes I failed at ninestartups, got fired from two
companies, quit three jobswithout notice, failed out of
college, lost a ton of money ona bad investment.
Let me be clear those memoriesdon't fade.
If you'd like to listen to myradio show, there's a lot of
different ways you can do it.
I can raise millions intoBerryShowcom.
(13:42):
Click on how to Listen andwhile you're there, you might
even discover how I could buyyou a cup of coffee.
Thanks for listening.
This program, yay).
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