March 7, 2025 • 17 mins
Mike runs his mouth on if we should treat LinkedIn like other types of social media platforms, and how birthday weeks/funerals seemingly come across as more selfish than anticipated.
If you would like to share your opinion, send an email to lnbemedia@gmail.com and don't forget to follow me on Instagram and TikTok @thelnbepodcast.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
all right.
So, continuing on with podcastroulette, I am posting this
episode on friday.
So this is kind of like oldtimes.
I was gonna try for wednesdayor thursday but shit just kept
coming up and I really didn'twant to not post anything.
So I guess Friday it is andthis also actually might be a
good experiment for you guys too, just to kind of let me know
(00:32):
what you like and to let me know.
Hey, you know, we were kind ofliking it on this day or,
honestly, maybe you like beingsurprised, I don't know.
But if you want to tell me, youcan email me at lmbemedia at
gmailcom, or you could just DMme on my socials, on Instagram
and TikTok, at the LNBE podcast.
(00:53):
Oh, but you know, speaking ofsocials, I was scrolling through
LinkedIn because I was jobhunting and it kind of got me
thinking what would happen if westarted treating linkedin like
instagram and facebook like I.
I was scrolling through and Isaw a post from a company that I
worked for and I'm just likewhat would happen if I just
started throwing shade andairing out some dirty laundry?
(01:15):
Look, imagine you get laid offor fired from a job and you see
a post saying happy, happy work,anniversary, so-and-so, and
underneath you just comment, wow, you still work for that dump.
Oh my God.
My specialty in marketing wasorganic SEO, but one company
(01:36):
that I worked for also wanted meto do their social media, which
, as we all know, is not myforte.
But what do you do in corporateAmerica?
You say yes, master, or elseyou get labeled as difficult to
work with.
So I did it.
And do you know how hard it isto write positive posts about
(01:58):
people that you can't stand, bro?
I can't even stand myself 90%of the time time, and you expect
me to say something nice aboutyou, like congrats on not
getting fired despite beingpainfully incompetent.
Oh yeah, talking to you makesme want to take a fork to the
(02:19):
eye.
But sure, let me post aboutyour strong leadership skills.
But you know, as I wasscrolling through the socials, I
was going through Reddit and Isaw this thread about nicknames
for useless coworkers, and onethat I remember was Lantern,
(02:42):
because they weren't very brightand they had to be carried
through everything, and thatjust got me thinking like we
should just start calling ourco-workers corn, because as
people, they're not easilydigestible and they just always
seem to be found in shit.
Oh my God, I really have waytoo much time on my hands.
But speaking of people who thinkthat they're more important
than they are, let's talk aboutbirthdays.
(03:04):
So, as I mentioned, the lastepisode that I put out whenever
that was that it was my birthdayat the end of February, and I
think there's something to besaid about the company who still
lets you take your birthday off, though I do think that that's
becoming more of an outdatedpractice now, because, good,
(03:28):
you're growing up and yourealize that your birthday is
just another fucking day and theonly person who cares about it
is you and or maybe your parents, like hell.
It's not even like you were theone who put in any of the work
so that you could be here onthis glorious day.
I can't stand the absolutenarcissists who need a full week
(03:49):
to celebrate their birthdays.
Honestly, if you need a fullweek to celebrate one day,
that's all about you.
What does that actually sayabout you?
Like, even Jesus only gets oneday for us to reminisce and
celebrate, yet you need a wholeweek.
So, in essence, you're tellingme that you think that you're
(04:11):
better than the son of Godhimself?
Huh, and why is it always thesame type of person who needs a
birthday week, like I've neverseen a dude named Gary demand a
five-day celebration, but everychick named Emily has a full
itinerary, color-coded at all.
And these people who havedestination birthdays, why do
(04:33):
you feel like you're thatimportant?
Do us all a favor go to yourdestination and just fucking
stay there like you are justliving proof as somebody that I
don't want to deal with, becausethat just proves how needy or
high maintenance you are.
Like, let's be real here.
Birthdays stop mattering afterthe age of 17.
(04:56):
By 18, the only one keepingtrack is the IRS.
I'll give some leniency to amiracle baby that had like a
crazy stat line with like a 10%chance of being conceived, a 30%
chance of surviving thebirthing process, a 90% chance
that they won't see their 32ndbirthday.
I'll give you that.
Then, yeah, celebrate yourbirthday, because at that point
(05:20):
you're literally racing againstthe clock.
But, newsflash, we're all gonnadie someday.
So technically, no matter what,I feel like we're all kind of
in the same boat, miracle statline or not, and it's just not
my fault that some people'stimers run out faster than
others.
But that's why I also feel likewe have funerals.
(05:42):
Like, yeah, it's sad whensomebody dies, just because it's
also, I feel like, justaccepted to be so, just due to
the thought that it's a loss oflife.
But I feel like even funeralsare kind of selfish to a degree.
Like you ever notice, when yougo to a funeral, everybody's sad
(06:03):
and the whole thought processis just like I won't get to talk
to them again or I won't get todo xyz with them again.
Like, yeah, you're sad, but alsonotice how every thought you
just said starts with I just sayand it's funny because whenever
(06:24):
you talk to couples orsomething, you always hear this
argument.
Not like I've ever been in arelationship long enough to have
this argument or love somebodyenough to have this argument.
Like couples always say to eachother they're just like I hope
I die first, I couldn't livewithout you.
But that's also just anotherway of saying like I love you so
(06:47):
much, I hope that you're theone that has to suffer horribly
in my absence.
Look, that is such a sweetsentiment.
Yeah, that's not selfish at all.
Like I want to go first so Idon't have to suffer, because
being without you would just betoo much for me.
Oh yeah, fuck your feelings.
(07:07):
I don't care how you would feelwhen I go first.
All I know is I'm the one thatdoesn't want to handle it.
I don't know, though.
I feel like there would be somebenefit to one person going
first, though, because then, allof a sudden, it's like yeah,
you might miss the snoring oryou might miss the arguments,
for about like maybe six monthsto a year, but as time goes on,
(07:32):
you'll get more comfortable like, oh shit, no more arguing about
what we're going to watch on TV, no more arguing about what
we're going to make for dinner.
Oh my God, I couldn't rememberthe last time I had this much
room in the bed.
Get up here, sparky, let'ssnuggle.
Trust me, I think you'd be ableto make, do?
I don't know, man, it's justfunny to me that with birthdays,
(07:56):
we celebrate the year that wejust had around the sun.
So, like, you turn 30 becausethat's technically because you
lived your 30th year.
So, if you think about it,birthdays are weirdly about
celebrating the past, butfunerals, on the other, we oddly
(08:19):
think about them in a futuresense, like, oh, we won't be
able to do this with this personanymore.
Or I remember when we used todo this.
But now we can't, like you,think about the person in a past
tense but you think about whatyou could have done with the
person in a future tense.
I don't know if that's makingsense, but hopefully you guys
are following me.
I don't know if that's makingsense, but hopefully you guys
(08:39):
are following me.
But what I think that we shoulddo when it comes to funerals is
we should think about thepositives of life that we lived
with that person and celebratethe accomplishments that they
had, just like we kind of dowith birthdays, right?
Because with birthdays you'recelebrating the year that you
had, so you're also celebratingall the accomplishments that you
(09:03):
had in that previous year.
Trust me, at my funeral, firstof all, I would be shocked if
anybody showed up, but for thehandful that do, I don't want
anybody sad.
I want you to play all thefuneral hits stairway to heaven
knocking on heaven's door.
Not the bob dylan version,though that dude sounds like
fucking dial up internet.
But yeah, dude, I don't know, Idon't want people upset at my
(09:26):
funeral.
Wakes are sad because, oh mygod, who the fuck actually wants
to go to a wake?
You go out of respect for thepeople who you know for the
person that they lost, but it'sjust like, oh my god, I'm so
sorry for your loss.
And then they're all sad andeverybody else is all sad.
Oh my god, they were such agreat person, dude.
(09:47):
I didn't fucking know him.
I know you, and now I'msubjected to seeing this dead
person just lying there in thiscasket, like dude.
This is not my idea of a goodtime.
Like, honestly, and the idea ofopening caskets.
Whose bright idea was that?
Like, does anybody actuallywant to see the fucking body?
(10:07):
Or the worst is when the makeupis just god awful, they all
look like the fucking joker.
Just lying there, man or woman,you're just like jesus.
Oh seriously, does anybodyactually want to go to a wake?
Stop inviting me to themHonestly, and I'll put out an
olive branch.
We may get that far.
Don't even go to mine, just goto my funeral.
(10:28):
Like that's all I care about.
Like go celebrate my life.
You don't need to fucking seeme.
You saw me when you were alive.
Then you should have a prettygood sense of what I look like
when I'm no longer with us.
But also if I am no longer withus and you never bothered to
call me or hang out when I wasalive, then don't bother coming
to see me when I'm dead.
If you don't have time for mewhen I'm alive, then you
(10:48):
definitely don't have time forme when I'm dead.
Go fuck yourself.
I don't need no fake friends atmy funeral, but what I will say
is if you were an avid hater ofme, or even are an avid hater of
me, or even are an avid haterof me, and you find out that I
pass away, you are more thanwelcome to come to my funeral
and celebrate the life that Ilived, because, number one, I'm
(11:09):
still petty and I got you to dothe one thing that you didn't
want to do, which is celebrateme.
But also, number two, if youwant to come by just to trash me
, go right, the fuck ahead.
The hell do I care, I'm dead.
I give a shit what you say atthat point.
It is also kind of funny,though, that, no matter what, at
a funeral, the eulogy is alwaysspun, no matter what kind of
(11:32):
life you live, to be positive,because nobody wants to be
remembered negatively, as if theperson in the casket is
listening to what you're sayinganyways.
So I don't know.
One thing that I ask is can wejust start making eulogies a
little bit more honest?
Like, can we do that?
There's only five of us here.
(11:53):
I think we all know why.
Yeah, dude, steve was kind of aprick man.
Dude took my lawnmower tenyears ago.
I only came because I wasthinking now I'd be able to
finally get it back.
Motherfucker never paid histaxes, but where was that $200 I
lent him two years ago?
I don't know man.
(12:14):
I don't know man.
I feel like corporate America,birthdays and funerals all have
a little bit more in common thanyou would think.
Because at work you gottapretend to care about somebody's
team building skills onLinkedIn and acknowledge
somebody's good, becausecorporations want to pretend
that they care like, hey, thanksfor all you do.
(12:35):
Here's a LinkedIn post ratherthan a raise, as if that post
even matters to anyone exceptwho the post is for.
Just like when you have topretend that it's Emily's
birthday week, as if thatmatters to anybody but her.
And for what?
Survival In corporate America.
If you don't play along, you'redifficult to work with in life.
(12:57):
If you don't acknowledgesomebody's birthday month,
you're an asshole.
But either way, if you don'tacknowledge either, you'll be
celebrating the death of afriendship or a termination with
a company, like I'm sorry thatI don't care, that you care that
I don't care, but I meanthrowing shade is kind of fun.
(13:20):
I just wish we could do it inmore inappropriate areas.
I mean, hell, kendrick Lamarthrew shade at Drake during
arguably the most televisedevent in America, during the
Super Bowl.
So why is there always thislevel of professionalism that we
all need to have?
If you can't take the heat,stay out of the kitchen and look
(13:41):
.
I'm not saying go up toeveryone that you know or
dislike and just start being anasshole.
You got to pick and choose yourbattles.
But how much more entertainingwould LinkedIn be or funerals
would be If we treated thosethings like more fun social
platforms like Instagram orFacebook or whatever, where
(14:03):
Emily posts about her B-Day weekand somebody under it goes oh,
wow, seven days for the sevenyears old that you're still
acting.
Oh, disney theme Well, I mean,you are a little bit goofy, got
him.
But it is kind of funny too howLinkedIn bios are essentially
(14:24):
like a funeral eulogy, like oh,I'm always helpful.
Looking to improve in insertfield, I would give the shirt
off my back to help improve yourROI or whatever your department
is or in life or whatever thefuck Like.
Shut up, greg.
I worked with you and the factthat you even lasted this long
is a miracle in itself, eitheron LinkedIn or in life in
(14:46):
general.
Yeah, but that really isn't theChristian thing to do, is it?
You always got to turn theother cheek and do right unto
those that have not done rightunto you, and all that shit,
cause I know what you guys arethinking, mike, isn't all this
talk of throwing shade Kind of Idon't know, maybe un-Christian?
And yeah, probably Could alsobe just my other despair for
(15:11):
corporate America, consideringI'm just being saltier than the
Dead Sea With my situation rightnow.
After all, it's also not likeJesus was out here, considering
I'm just being saltier than theDead Sea with my situation right
now.
After all, it's also not likeJesus was out here subtweeting
the Pharisees or leavingpassive-aggressive comments on
LinkedIn like Wow, stillscamming people in the temple.
Bold move, cotton.
I don't know.
That's the thing, though.
It's not about being perfect.
(15:33):
I feel like it's just abouttrying to be better than you
were the day before, and maybethat means me resisting the urge
to comment oh, you still workfor that dump on a former
co-worker's post.
Maybe it means not tellingEmily that she's not more
important than the son of God,even if she does have a full
birthday itinerary for a fullfucking week.
(15:55):
I mean, jesus did say to loveyour neighbor, but he didn't say
that you have to like theirLinkedIn posts.
So, yeah, I mean throwing shadeis fun, but at the end of the
day, maybe we all should justchill a little.
Focus less on fake corporatepleasantries, stop expecting the
world to care about ourbirthday and maybe and maybe
(16:18):
maybe just be honest at funerals, like, yes, steve might not
have been the best guy, but atleast I don't gotta track him
down for my stuff anymore.
And look, I know some of youmight say that it's wrong to
joke about funerals or religion.
But also also, if you don'tthink that god has a sense of
(16:39):
humor, you're crazy.
I mean, he made me.
You think this was an accident.
God looked at me and was like,yeah, let's see how this one
plays out.
And if you like how this episodeplayed out, make sure that you
share it with a friend.
Send it to a co-worker to wastetheir time.
(16:59):
I don't care what you do, butplease also rate it, comment,
subscribe, because any activitythat you guys do really helps
boost this to the top.
I appreciate all the supportthat you guys give me and also
feel free to check me out on mysocials.
You can find me on instagramand tiktok at the lmbe podcast,
or, if you guys want to write in, you can email me at lmbemedia
(17:20):
at gmailcom.
Thank you guys so much forlistening.
I hope you all have a fantasticweek and I'll catch up with you
when I catch up.
Thank you.
all right.
So, continuing on with podcastroulette, I am posting this
episode on friday.
So this is kind of like oldtimes.
I was gonna try for wednesdayor thursday but shit just kept
coming up and I really didn'twant to not post anything.
So I guess Friday it is andthis also actually might be a
good experiment for you guys too, just to kind of let me know
(00:32):
what you like and to let me know.
Hey, you know, we were kind ofliking it on this day or,
honestly, maybe you like beingsurprised, I don't know.
But if you want to tell me, youcan email me at lmbemedia at
gmailcom, or you could just DMme on my socials, on Instagram
and TikTok, at the LNBE podcast.
(00:53):
Oh, but you know, speaking ofsocials, I was scrolling through
LinkedIn because I was jobhunting and it kind of got me
thinking what would happen if westarted treating linkedin like
instagram and facebook like I.
I was scrolling through and Isaw a post from a company that I
worked for and I'm just likewhat would happen if I just
started throwing shade andairing out some dirty laundry?
(01:15):
Look, imagine you get laid offor fired from a job and you see
a post saying happy, happy work,anniversary, so-and-so, and
underneath you just comment, wow, you still work for that dump.
Oh my God.
My specialty in marketing wasorganic SEO, but one company
(01:36):
that I worked for also wanted meto do their social media, which
, as we all know, is not myforte.
But what do you do in corporateAmerica?
You say yes, master, or elseyou get labeled as difficult to
work with.
So I did it.
And do you know how hard it isto write positive posts about
(01:58):
people that you can't stand, bro?
I can't even stand myself 90%of the time time, and you expect
me to say something nice aboutyou, like congrats on not
getting fired despite beingpainfully incompetent.
Oh yeah, talking to you makesme want to take a fork to the
(02:19):
eye.
But sure, let me post aboutyour strong leadership skills.
But you know, as I wasscrolling through the socials, I
was going through Reddit and Isaw this thread about nicknames
for useless coworkers, and onethat I remember was Lantern,
(02:42):
because they weren't very brightand they had to be carried
through everything, and thatjust got me thinking like we
should just start calling ourco-workers corn, because as
people, they're not easilydigestible and they just always
seem to be found in shit.
Oh my God, I really have waytoo much time on my hands.
But speaking of people who thinkthat they're more important
than they are, let's talk aboutbirthdays.
(03:04):
So, as I mentioned, the lastepisode that I put out whenever
that was that it was my birthdayat the end of February, and I
think there's something to besaid about the company who still
lets you take your birthday off, though I do think that that's
becoming more of an outdatedpractice now, because, good,
(03:28):
you're growing up and yourealize that your birthday is
just another fucking day and theonly person who cares about it
is you and or maybe your parents, like hell.
It's not even like you were theone who put in any of the work
so that you could be here onthis glorious day.
I can't stand the absolutenarcissists who need a full week
(03:49):
to celebrate their birthdays.
Honestly, if you need a fullweek to celebrate one day,
that's all about you.
What does that actually sayabout you?
Like, even Jesus only gets oneday for us to reminisce and
celebrate, yet you need a wholeweek.
So, in essence, you're tellingme that you think that you're
(04:11):
better than the son of Godhimself?
Huh, and why is it always thesame type of person who needs a
birthday week, like I've neverseen a dude named Gary demand a
five-day celebration, but everychick named Emily has a full
itinerary, color-coded at all.
And these people who havedestination birthdays, why do
(04:33):
you feel like you're thatimportant?
Do us all a favor go to yourdestination and just fucking
stay there like you are justliving proof as somebody that I
don't want to deal with, becausethat just proves how needy or
high maintenance you are.
Like, let's be real here.
Birthdays stop mattering afterthe age of 17.
(04:56):
By 18, the only one keepingtrack is the IRS.
I'll give some leniency to amiracle baby that had like a
crazy stat line with like a 10%chance of being conceived, a 30%
chance of surviving thebirthing process, a 90% chance
that they won't see their 32ndbirthday.
I'll give you that.
Then, yeah, celebrate yourbirthday, because at that point
(05:20):
you're literally racing againstthe clock.
But, newsflash, we're all gonnadie someday.
So technically, no matter what,I feel like we're all kind of
in the same boat, miracle statline or not, and it's just not
my fault that some people'stimers run out faster than
others.
But that's why I also feel likewe have funerals.
(05:42):
Like, yeah, it's sad whensomebody dies, just because it's
also, I feel like, justaccepted to be so, just due to
the thought that it's a loss oflife.
But I feel like even funeralsare kind of selfish to a degree.
Like you ever notice, when yougo to a funeral, everybody's sad
(06:03):
and the whole thought processis just like I won't get to talk
to them again or I won't get todo xyz with them again.
Like, yeah, you're sad, but alsonotice how every thought you
just said starts with I just sayand it's funny because whenever
(06:24):
you talk to couples orsomething, you always hear this
argument.
Not like I've ever been in arelationship long enough to have
this argument or love somebodyenough to have this argument.
Like couples always say to eachother they're just like I hope
I die first, I couldn't livewithout you.
But that's also just anotherway of saying like I love you so
(06:47):
much, I hope that you're theone that has to suffer horribly
in my absence.
Look, that is such a sweetsentiment.
Yeah, that's not selfish at all.
Like I want to go first so Idon't have to suffer, because
being without you would just betoo much for me.
Oh yeah, fuck your feelings.
(07:07):
I don't care how you would feelwhen I go first.
All I know is I'm the one thatdoesn't want to handle it.
I don't know, though.
I feel like there would be somebenefit to one person going
first, though, because then, allof a sudden, it's like yeah,
you might miss the snoring oryou might miss the arguments,
for about like maybe six monthsto a year, but as time goes on,
(07:32):
you'll get more comfortable like, oh shit, no more arguing about
what we're going to watch on TV, no more arguing about what
we're going to make for dinner.
Oh my God, I couldn't rememberthe last time I had this much
room in the bed.
Get up here, sparky, let'ssnuggle.
Trust me, I think you'd be ableto make, do?
I don't know, man, it's justfunny to me that with birthdays,
(07:56):
we celebrate the year that wejust had around the sun.
So, like, you turn 30 becausethat's technically because you
lived your 30th year.
So, if you think about it,birthdays are weirdly about
celebrating the past, butfunerals, on the other, we oddly
(08:19):
think about them in a futuresense, like, oh, we won't be
able to do this with this personanymore.
Or I remember when we used todo this.
But now we can't, like you,think about the person in a past
tense but you think about whatyou could have done with the
person in a future tense.
I don't know if that's makingsense, but hopefully you guys
are following me.
I don't know if that's makingsense, but hopefully you guys
(08:39):
are following me.
But what I think that we shoulddo when it comes to funerals is
we should think about thepositives of life that we lived
with that person and celebratethe accomplishments that they
had, just like we kind of dowith birthdays, right?
Because with birthdays you'recelebrating the year that you
had, so you're also celebratingall the accomplishments that you
(09:03):
had in that previous year.
Trust me, at my funeral, firstof all, I would be shocked if
anybody showed up, but for thehandful that do, I don't want
anybody sad.
I want you to play all thefuneral hits stairway to heaven
knocking on heaven's door.
Not the bob dylan version,though that dude sounds like
fucking dial up internet.
But yeah, dude, I don't know, Idon't want people upset at my
(09:26):
funeral.
Wakes are sad because, oh mygod, who the fuck actually wants
to go to a wake?
You go out of respect for thepeople who you know for the
person that they lost, but it'sjust like, oh my god, I'm so
sorry for your loss.
And then they're all sad andeverybody else is all sad.
Oh my god, they were such agreat person, dude.
(09:47):
I didn't fucking know him.
I know you, and now I'msubjected to seeing this dead
person just lying there in thiscasket, like dude.
This is not my idea of a goodtime.
Like, honestly, and the idea ofopening caskets.
Whose bright idea was that?
Like, does anybody actuallywant to see the fucking body?
(10:07):
Or the worst is when the makeupis just god awful, they all
look like the fucking joker.
Just lying there, man or woman,you're just like jesus.
Oh seriously, does anybodyactually want to go to a wake?
Stop inviting me to themHonestly, and I'll put out an
olive branch.
We may get that far.
Don't even go to mine, just goto my funeral.
(10:28):
Like that's all I care about.
Like go celebrate my life.
You don't need to fucking seeme.
You saw me when you were alive.
Then you should have a prettygood sense of what I look like
when I'm no longer with us.
But also if I am no longer withus and you never bothered to
call me or hang out when I wasalive, then don't bother coming
to see me when I'm dead.
If you don't have time for mewhen I'm alive, then you
(10:48):
definitely don't have time forme when I'm dead.
Go fuck yourself.
I don't need no fake friends atmy funeral, but what I will say
is if you were an avid hater ofme, or even are an avid hater of
me, or even are an avid haterof me, and you find out that I
pass away, you are more thanwelcome to come to my funeral
and celebrate the life that Ilived, because, number one, I'm
(11:09):
still petty and I got you to dothe one thing that you didn't
want to do, which is celebrateme.
But also, number two, if youwant to come by just to trash me
, go right, the fuck ahead.
The hell do I care, I'm dead.
I give a shit what you say atthat point.
It is also kind of funny,though, that, no matter what, at
a funeral, the eulogy is alwaysspun, no matter what kind of
(11:32):
life you live, to be positive,because nobody wants to be
remembered negatively, as if theperson in the casket is
listening to what you're sayinganyways.
So I don't know.
One thing that I ask is can wejust start making eulogies a
little bit more honest?
Like, can we do that?
There's only five of us here.
(11:53):
I think we all know why.
Yeah, dude, steve was kind of aprick man.
Dude took my lawnmower tenyears ago.
I only came because I wasthinking now I'd be able to
finally get it back.
Motherfucker never paid histaxes, but where was that $200 I
lent him two years ago?
I don't know man.
(12:14):
I don't know man.
I feel like corporate America,birthdays and funerals all have
a little bit more in common thanyou would think.
Because at work you gottapretend to care about somebody's
team building skills onLinkedIn and acknowledge
somebody's good, becausecorporations want to pretend
that they care like, hey, thanksfor all you do.
(12:35):
Here's a LinkedIn post ratherthan a raise, as if that post
even matters to anyone exceptwho the post is for.
Just like when you have topretend that it's Emily's
birthday week, as if thatmatters to anybody but her.
And for what?
Survival In corporate America.
If you don't play along, you'redifficult to work with in life.
(12:57):
If you don't acknowledgesomebody's birthday month,
you're an asshole.
But either way, if you don'tacknowledge either, you'll be
celebrating the death of afriendship or a termination with
a company, like I'm sorry thatI don't care, that you care that
I don't care, but I meanthrowing shade is kind of fun.
(13:20):
I just wish we could do it inmore inappropriate areas.
I mean, hell, kendrick Lamarthrew shade at Drake during
arguably the most televisedevent in America, during the
Super Bowl.
So why is there always thislevel of professionalism that we
all need to have?
If you can't take the heat,stay out of the kitchen and look
(13:41):
.
I'm not saying go up toeveryone that you know or
dislike and just start being anasshole.
You got to pick and choose yourbattles.
But how much more entertainingwould LinkedIn be or funerals
would be If we treated thosethings like more fun social
platforms like Instagram orFacebook or whatever, where
(14:03):
Emily posts about her B-Day weekand somebody under it goes oh,
wow, seven days for the sevenyears old that you're still
acting.
Oh, disney theme Well, I mean,you are a little bit goofy, got
him.
But it is kind of funny too howLinkedIn bios are essentially
(14:24):
like a funeral eulogy, like oh,I'm always helpful.
Looking to improve in insertfield, I would give the shirt
off my back to help improve yourROI or whatever your department
is or in life or whatever thefuck Like.
Shut up, greg.
I worked with you and the factthat you even lasted this long
is a miracle in itself, eitheron LinkedIn or in life in
(14:46):
general.
Yeah, but that really isn't theChristian thing to do, is it?
You always got to turn theother cheek and do right unto
those that have not done rightunto you, and all that shit,
cause I know what you guys arethinking, mike, isn't all this
talk of throwing shade Kind of Idon't know, maybe un-Christian?
And yeah, probably Could alsobe just my other despair for
(15:11):
corporate America, consideringI'm just being saltier than the
Dead Sea With my situation rightnow.
After all, it's also not likeJesus was out here, considering
I'm just being saltier than theDead Sea with my situation right
now.
After all, it's also not likeJesus was out here subtweeting
the Pharisees or leavingpassive-aggressive comments on
LinkedIn like Wow, stillscamming people in the temple.
Bold move, cotton.
I don't know.
That's the thing, though.
It's not about being perfect.
(15:33):
I feel like it's just abouttrying to be better than you
were the day before, and maybethat means me resisting the urge
to comment oh, you still workfor that dump on a former
co-worker's post.
Maybe it means not tellingEmily that she's not more
important than the son of God,even if she does have a full
birthday itinerary for a fullfucking week.
(15:55):
I mean, jesus did say to loveyour neighbor, but he didn't say
that you have to like theirLinkedIn posts.
So, yeah, I mean throwing shadeis fun, but at the end of the
day, maybe we all should justchill a little.
Focus less on fake corporatepleasantries, stop expecting the
world to care about ourbirthday and maybe and maybe
(16:18):
maybe just be honest at funerals, like, yes, steve might not
have been the best guy, but atleast I don't gotta track him
down for my stuff anymore.
And look, I know some of youmight say that it's wrong to
joke about funerals or religion.
But also also, if you don'tthink that god has a sense of
(16:39):
humor, you're crazy.
I mean, he made me.
You think this was an accident.
God looked at me and was like,yeah, let's see how this one
plays out.
And if you like how this episodeplayed out, make sure that you
share it with a friend.
Send it to a co-worker to wastetheir time.
(16:59):
I don't care what you do, butplease also rate it, comment,
subscribe, because any activitythat you guys do really helps
boost this to the top.
I appreciate all the supportthat you guys give me and also
feel free to check me out on mysocials.
You can find me on instagramand tiktok at the lmbe podcast,
or, if you guys want to write in, you can email me at lmbemedia
(17:20):
at gmailcom.
Thank you guys so much forlistening.
I hope you all have a fantasticweek and I'll catch up with you
when I catch up.
Thank you.
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