The Long Take

The Long Take

Another movie podcast by two know-it-all guys—Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar—killing their careers and burning bridges in Bollywood one review at a time. New episodes weekly.

Episodes

December 22, 2025 32 mins

Avatar: Fire and Ash is the weakest instalment of James Cameron’s trilogy.

We discuss the many ways in which the movie betrays the franchise’s core values, the illogical directions that Cameron sends Jake Sully in, and the loose ends that the film ends with.

We also talk about the lack of humour and self-awareness, the poor dialogue, and the incomprehensible third act action sequences.

Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar, The Long...

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You cannot separate a film’s politics from its craft—you cannot separate your own politics from your opinion. To do so would be like judging a Dal Makhani on the basis of presentation but not taste.

Dhurandhar is vile propaganda whose influence will spread beyond even its target audience of unemployed youth and WhatsApp uncles. We discuss how objectionable every scene involving R. Madhavan is, how abrupt the climax feels, and why di...

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December 5, 2025 17 mins

The Girlfriend seems like a direct response to the widespread misogyny of Indian cinema, but it feels disingenuous because it stars someone who has defended that very misogyny.

We discuss the unintelligent character that Rashmika Mandanna has been saddled with, and wonder if the only path towards feminism that Indian filmmakers know involves taking a detour via humiliation.

We also talk about the film’s on-the-nose storytelling, whic...

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December 1, 2025 19 mins

Sunny Sanskari Ki Tulsi Kumari is more like a sitcom written by a Dharma committee than a proper movie.

We discuss Varun Dhawan’s seemingly stagnant evolution as an actor, Janhvi Kapoor moving in the opposite direction, and Sanya Malhotra and Rohit Saraf happily accepting the paycheque.

We also talk about the film’s incoherent narrative, unimaginative plot, and strange lack of confidence.

Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar, The L...

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November 24, 2025 20 mins

Nishaanchi: Part 2 features arguably the best climax that Anurag Kashyap has ever orchestrated.

We discuss the two-part experience as a whole, Kashyap’s modern update to old-school Bollywood tropes, and the magnetism of Monika Panwar’s Manjari.

We also discuss the film’s broader themes of revenge, the stylistic influences, and welcome Kashyap’s long-awaited return to form.


Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar, The Long Take is ...

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November 18, 2025 21 mins

Anurag Kashyap’s Nishaanchi: Part 1 is a welcome return to form, and the long-awaited spiritual successor to Gangs of Wasseypur that his fans have been waiting for.

We discuss the film’s complex approach to classic themes of revenge, betrayal, and jealousy, while also praising the central performances. Along the way, we commend Kashyap’s inimitable writing and inherent sympathy for the devil.

Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar, ...

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November 10, 2025 17 mins

Lokah Chapter 1: Chandra is perhaps the most overrated Indian movie of the year.

We discuss the film’s inert narrative, jarring action, and inelegant world-building that includes an unnecessary detour into Kantara territory.

We also talk about where the franchise could head next, and why it would immediately be better if merged with the Minnal Murali universe.

Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar, The Long Take is fully bootstrappe...

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October 28, 2025 21 mins

Param Sundari, the new film starring Janhvi Kapoor and Sidharth Malhotra, seems to make things up as it goes along.

We discuss the offensive cultural appropriation in every frame of the film, the odd motivations of its protagonists, and the film’s reliance on cultural stereotypes.

We also talk about Janhvi Kapoor’s wardrobe, a potentially incendiary scene set inside a church, and how Bollywood filmmakers continue to fail upwards.

Hos...

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October 11, 2025 23 mins

Homebound, Neeraj Ghaywan’s second feature film in a decade, is well worth the wait.

Already selected as India’s official entry for the 2026 Oscars, Homebound is just as moving as Ghaywan’s widely admired debut film, Masaan. We discuss its poetic storytelling, deeply empathetic eye, and the fabulous central performances of Vishal Jethwa and Ishaan Khatter. 

We also talk about its daring, humanist approach to spotlighting minority com...

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September 10, 2025 19 mins

Inspector Zende, the new spoof movie starring Manoj Bajpayee and Jim Sarbh, succeeds as a concept but fails in execution.

What could’ve been a homegrown homage to The Naked Gun comes across as a first draft in need of clever rewrites.

While Bajpayee is going full ham in the central role, matching the movie’s energy, Sarbh seems to have been told to tone it down. The result is a tonally uneven ride that could’ve been worse, but also b...

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September 4, 2025 16 mins

Songs of Paradise is like a 1950s movie that has time-traveled to the present day.

We discuss the film’s old-fashioned narrative and undemanding themes, the chasm of quality between Saba Azad and Sheeba Chaddha’s performances, and the limited ambition of writer-director Danish Renzu.

Songs of Paradise could’ve worked as a metaphor for post-Independence Kashmir, but instead, it’s like a bedtime story for five-year-olds.

Hosted by Akhi...

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August 27, 2025 17 mins

In the Tamil-language film Maareesan, the plot twist comes not at the end, but midway through. 

We talk about the sudden change in tone, and how the film handles it. We also discuss Fahadh Faasil’s comedic performance, and wonder why the film is presented through the perspective of his character.

But mainly, we talk about the film’s shady morality, which seems to champion extrajudicial killings if the cause is perceived as noble enou...

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August 19, 2025 18 mins

Tehran—the new John Abraham political action thriller—literally cannot identify the country of Georgia on the map.

The movie also goes out of its way to make its protagonist an apolitical man who somehow annoys the governments of three nations, including his own.

We discuss the film’s muddled messaging, its bizarre third act, and the arrogance with which it thinks it can get away with claiming Scotland is Iran.

Hosted by Akhil Arora ...

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August 6, 2025 20 mins

Sitaare Zameen Par—marketed as the spiritual sequel to Aamir Khan’s 2007 hit Taare Zameen Par—is a shoddily made, preachy, borderline insensitive film with a noble mission.

However, just because it aims to raise awareness about an admirable cause doesn’t excuse its cringeworthy tone, Khan and Genelia Deshmukh’s subpar performances, and its casual othering of the neurodivergent community.

We discuss the film’s many problems before fin...

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July 24, 2025 22 mins

Is Dharma trying to actively sabotage Ibrahim Ali Khan’s career? After the unwatchable Nadaaniyan, the studio has released the equally inept Sarzameen, a feature-length debut for director Kayoze Irani.

We discuss the film’s unintelligent characters and confusing narrative, and wonder if most of it was left on the cutting room floor. We also talk about some of its more harebrained twists and the unintentional political statements it ...

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June 19, 2025 22 mins

The Malayalam-language sports comedy film Alappuzha Gymkhana has no stakes, no villain, and no classic structure. This could either have been a bold decision or an act of self-sabotage. It’s somewhere in the middle.

We talk about the film’s underdeveloped characters, its over-reliance on flashy camerawork, and its overlong second half. We also discuss its cultural specificity, its zero-stakes narrative, and its refreshing idea of ma...

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June 11, 2025 22 mins

After producing two movies about a hyper-masculine cop who literally lynches people, Nikkhil Advani has attached himself as an executive producer to Stolen, the new survival thriller on Prime Video.

In addition to Advani, the movie needed the support of heavy hitters such as Anurag Kashyap, Kiran Rao, and Vikramaditya Motwane in order to get a release after a festival run that began in 2023. Fortunately, it did, because it’s one of ...

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Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning may or may not be Tom Cruise’s final time playing IMF agent Ethan Hunt, but the movie is certainly not worthy of taking on sendoff responsibilities.

We discuss its two standout action set pieces, convoluted plot, and how it compares to its predecessor, Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning.

We also talk about Cruise’s portrayal as a mythic god and the movie’s over-reliance on exposition.

Hoste...

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May 12, 2025 18 mins

No diplomacy takes place in the new John Abraham film The Diplomat, which is now streaming on Netflix after a theatrical run earlier this year.

While Abraham doesn’t throw any punches in the film, The Diplomat is hardly a toned-down drama for adults.

We discuss the film’s odd narrative choices, unnecessary non-linear writing, and the absolute miscasting of Abraham. We also talk about the film’s problematic perspective, which reduces ...

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April 29, 2025 21 mins

Weeks after Nadaaniyan that starred his son, Saif Ali Khan’s Jewel Thief: The Heist Begins—inexplicably—further lowers the bar for Netflix India. 

We struggle to talk meaningfully about the heist movie and instead find ourselves discussing Netflix’s terrible track record in India.

We wonder why an actor of Jaideep Ahlawat’s talent would put himself through this, and eventually get around to poking holes in the film’s plot and questio...

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