August 6, 2024 • 45 mins
Our host and action actress Cindy Claes has been on an intense Krav Maga (self-defense) journey. Initially training to perfect her fighting skills for the camera, it soon evolved into a transformative experience of emotional resilience. Many questions started to arise. She experienced tears in the training sessions, as well as a huge amount of love.
Join our conversation with Sergej Krivoruchko as we unravel the profound and unexpected connections between his Krav Maga journey and his new life in Bulgaria: a quest of calming the nervous system. How can Krav Maga and self-defense go beyond physical safety to become a journey of emotional healing and personal growth?
Sergej, founder of Authentic Bulgaria, shares his compelling story of finding security and safety within, first through Krav Maga and then by moving to Bulgaria. After running a Krav Maga club in Knokke, he left the busy bubbling cities of Belgium (or the concrete jungles as he calls it), and is now on a mission to create safe environments by taking people on tours in the wonders of Bulgaria.
Our conversation focuses on the calming of the nervous system, the finding of a community we belong to, and our body sensations when getting out of our comfort zones. Krav Maga and Sergej's new life in Bulgaria share this importance of needing to feel secure both physically and emotionally. Sergej's journey of belonging in a new society is a very special and mindful one.
Contact guest:
@sergej_bulgaria
@authentic.bulgaria.tours
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Loud Whisper Takeover podcast.
Today we will talk about KravMaga, which is a self-defense
practice, and have a specialguest with me because I want to
actually explore what Krav Magahas to do with love, compassion
and personal development.
I give you a little bit ofcontext.
I started Krav Maga as anaction actress, thinking I will
(00:22):
learn some self-defense things,because there are elements of
boxing, brazilian jiu-jitsu welearn to defend ourselves
against weapons and as an actionactress, those are great skills
to have.
However, during training,you'll learn things that go
against your instinct of notwanting to harm other people.
I started crying many times inclass.
(00:45):
I did not expect that, andanother journey began.
I became aware that there wasphysical healing that was taking
place on a cellular level.
I became present to.
I was learning about giving andreceiving love and being in the
presence of supportivemasculine energy.
I met an amazing human being inBulgaria.
(01:07):
He is organizing outdoorsurvival in Krav Maga camps in
forests and mountains themountains of Bulgaria.
He's dedicated to creating safespaces for groups that he takes
with him on these journeys.
He is really dedicated tocreate spaces where there is
respect, responsibility,integrity.
There's a lot ofself-reflection going on.
(01:30):
He is the founder of AuthenticBulgaria.
Sergei Bulgaria.
Welcome.
Welcome, sergei.
How are you doing?
Speaker 2 (01:39):
That's a great introduction.
We can stop the podcast now.
It was the great, the greatestintroduction.
Yeah, I cannot any add anything.
So, yeah, my name is sergeybulgaria.
I'm currently a tour guide inbulgaria and organize
small-scale tours in ruralbulgaria for people who are fed
(02:01):
up with, uh, you know, the masstourism and when they go on a
holiday they don't want to betreated like a number.
So I bring them to places offthe beaten track so they can
feel seen and welcome.
And currently I don't teachKrav Maga because I'm injured,
(02:26):
injured, but sometimes there aresome Krav Maga elements in the
tours that are organized,because it's only sightseeing is
sometimes a bit boring, sopeople can can let the let off
the steam awesome, and so wewill talk about your tours in
Bulgaria as well, becausethere's something very beautiful
about it.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
But first, maybe for listeners that don't really know
what Krav Maga is, can we givethem a little bit of an
explanation of how you see whatKrav Maga is.
Can we give them a little bitof an explanation of how you see
what Krav Maga is?
Because, also, you are that guythat loves cuddling cats.
You are a cuddler, you lovekindness, you're a very
compassionate human being.
Yet you became a Krav Magapractitioner.
(03:00):
You had a Krav Maga club aswell in Belgium when you used to
live in Belgium.
Yeah, how do you see Krav Magaand you know its relationship to
violence, perhaps, and how you,as a very kind guy, got
involved into that yeah, I thinkmaybe people can relate.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
I grew up in a small village at the seaside, very,
very cozy, in Belgium, and thenI, when I turned 18, 19, I had
to study in a big city, antwerpand antwerp is a very noisy city
.
A lot of things are happeningat the same time and me I went
with my naive personality.
I went into the big city and Ididn't know what a university
(03:40):
was because I had to go to myfirst day and I looked around
and I wanted to ask people, butI didn't feel safe and I never
had this feeling like why Idon't, why I don't feel safe.
And then I see all these people,loud, outgoing, and and yeah,
not so polite or friendly thanin cozy village, where I grew up
(04:02):
.
I experienced a lot of unsafetyin my body and I didn't want to
have this.
I wanted to feel safe again.
So then I started the journeylike, okay, what should you do
when you don't feel safe?
Maybe you should do some boxing, whatever, I want to do some
taekwondo.
But I feel like I felt like ina realistic situation on the
(04:22):
streets, when there's a big guycoming up to you, what should
you do?
I really wanted to know what Ishould do, what I could do in
this kind of situation.
So then came Krav Maga, and KravMaga was for me, the right
(04:44):
thing to learn at that timebecause I really wanted to know
like things that are common,handy, like very useful,
effective on the streets.
So no, blah, blah.
And okay, I subscribed in myfirst class and I was a bit
intimidated by the big guys,obviously, because they were
like they weren't talking a lotand they were like very big and
(05:06):
my first class like hello, harry, nate, hello, how are you?
And there was some guys,ukrainian guys, and they say
hello, you know hello.
And they just did the exercise.
We did the exercise, but theywere not nice to me, they were
just it was you know howKramagai.
It's very realistic.
It depends which which Kramaga.
It's very realistic, it dependswhich Kramaga class you're
attending to.
But it was full contact, sothat meant half the class, a lot
(05:35):
of blueses, pain, aches.
But I said to myself like Ireally like this.
And then my journey started andafter 10 years I decided to
start my own club in Knokke.
But now I moved to Bulgaria somy club doesn't exist anymore.
But yeah, the hands-on thingwhat to do in a situation where
(05:58):
you don't feel safe it should betaught in school.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
Actually, that's my opinion, opinion, and so you
were talking about the fact thatyou didn't feel safe in the big
city.
Was it a true sense of notfeeling physically safe, or was
it both emotional and physical?
What did you?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
think.
I think it's both.
It's an end story due topersonal.
Everyone has his own story.
Traumas, blah, blah, blah.
It's a big thing now, but somethings are true about trauma and
, yeah, as well, physicallynever did, only did some soccer,
played some soccer, but neverwas into this.
(06:40):
It's a small world, thismartial art world.
Maybe I'm generalizing, buteveryone has tattoos, has a bald
head, a haircut and looksaggressive.
Yeah, like you that's me.
You don't look aggressive.
But, yeah, the big tough guy,typical tough guy and yeah, I'm
(07:00):
not that guy, but I still wantedto learn how to defend myself
and it didn't stop with thecrowd maga did some wrestling,
did some bjj boxing, so it's.
But that's what's crowd magaall about.
You don't want to um, you knowyou don't want to to show off
what your skills.
You want to show to the outsideworld that you know you.
(07:24):
You're not a fighter.
But when they make a problem,then, yeah, they feel it inside
that they feel this calm energy,and so they don't want pick you
as a victim on the streets orwhatever.
It's very important, it's aboutenergy as well.
They, yeah, they choose theprey, the what do you call?
Speaker 1 (07:43):
called someone who's yeah, the prey their target but
the one who is hunting, thehunter yeah, the bad guy, I
don't know that's called the badguy.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
They have, like a sensor, microseconds.
They can see whether you're aneasy victim or not and they
check everything.
It's based upon microseconds.
They can see whether you're aneasy victim or not and they
check everything.
It's based upon microseconds.
Where they have this sensor andit's okay, okay, no, this is a
not so easy target.
This is a crazy woman.
This is a crazy girl.
Oh, let's find another one.
(08:17):
So it starts with that and Ifelt that back in the days like
I was easy target.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
I want to just bounce back on a few things that
you've said.
So, first of all, would youagree if I summarize what Krav
Maga could be for those thathave never really seen it in
action?
Number one is self-defense, soit's not about attacking.
It's if a threat is coming toyou, you know how to respond.
Number two it's aboutde-escalating first.
(08:43):
If you can avoid any problems,you avoid it at all costs.
Number three is it's not aboutfighting and staying in the
fight for minutes or hours.
It's how can I basically giveone punch, two punches, but how
can I, as fast as possible,learn a technique where I
(09:04):
neutralize or hit my opponentand I have just the time to run
away?
Would that be something thatsummarizes it well?
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Yeah, that's correct, and nowadays you see a lot of
YouTube videos which are quitespectacular, but that's not the
case.
I attended the school, europeanKrav Maga Academy in Antwerp,
and the owner, luc van Laar, isa very no-nonsense guy, so he
doesn't care about stripes,about anything, he just wants to
.
You know, he just wants to getthe deal done and the deal is to
(09:36):
come out of safe, out of apotential threatening situation.
So it's not only the physicalpart, it is as well
de-escalation and that's a lotof.
That's verbally as well andpsychologically as well, because
you have to, you have to actunder pressure, and this is you
(09:56):
have to train this in arealistic way.
You cannot only talk about it,and that's why a lot of people
don't want to go to a Krav Magaclass because, yeah, they want
to learn the stuff, but in avery innocent way.
If the club, the Karmagak club,is a safe environment, that
means that the instructor shouldalways check every person if
(10:25):
they are training, because it'sfull contact.
If someone's hit or someone hasa trauma reaction or whatever,
they should stop the class.
You can push yourself a littlebit, that's true, but it has a
lot to do with the traumareactions of the body as well
and, in my opinion, a lot ofinstructors in the past.
(10:46):
They don't take into this intoconsideration.
They only want to have the yeah, the Superman badass.
It's not only about that.
It's maybe 30, 40%.
It's about the physical partand about the legal part of the
role.
What if, if you hit someone onthe head and you run away and
(11:09):
this person is injured for therest of her life, you should pay
, whatever the cameras did youhit first.
So these are all serious thingsto take into consideration and
that's why it's not only hittingon a ball or on a pad.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, because we learn techniques that literally,
like you say, can harm or hurtpeople for life, or they could
be blind forever, or even, likeKrav Maga, can teach you these
tools as well.
It's to be taken veryprecautiously and there's a lot
of responsibility that comeswith it.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah.
So that's why, if you're intoself-defense, go to a Krav Maga
club.
However, always stay true toyourself and feel whether you
feel safe enough, intuitively,with the instructor and the
atmosphere, and it should berealistic.
There are a couple of bulletpoints, criteria for a decent
(12:06):
Krav Maga, and it doesn't stopwith the Krav Maga.
If I would have done only KravMaga without at least have some
wrestling or BJJ experience, youhave to know what's going on
nowadays with the young people.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
And I just want to clarify the jargon for people
that maybe are less familiarwith martial arts.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
So BJJ is Brazilian jiu-jitsu in case some listeners
don't know it yeah, sometimeswe call like if you see two men
cuddling on the mat, it'sprobably bjj women.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Yeah yeah, I would not bounce back on the fact that
you were talking about traumareactions of the body because,
as I said, I started krav magaas an actress, wanting to learn
stuff for my action actingmovies.
I've started crying many timesin class and it's especially
sparring, so freestyle fightingright.
(12:57):
So all of a sudden the teachersays, okay, here we go for one
minute or 30 seconds, let's go.
It's soft sparring, but still Ihave my reaction Like there was
something on a cellular levelthat I cannot control, that came
out, that I had to become awareof, and so now there's a new
journey of healing that isstarting with it.
Have you had to overcome anychallenges on the beginning of
(13:22):
your journey or when you hadyour club in knokke?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
in belgium.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
Have you seen or experienced something alike with
students, maybe that you couldshare or want?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
to share.
A lot of times people freeze ora lot.
Most of the times people saythe people my niche, the, my
target audience were the peoplewere more a bit more shy,
introverted and people whothought that they would never
learn a martial art in theirlife because they're like
nothing for me and they're onlythe tough guys.
(13:56):
This was my target audience.
And then most of the timepeople said yeah, but I don't
want to hurt the other person.
But then I emphasized that okay, this is a safe environment,
you don't have to hit the person, but at least train your memory
muscle to hit the person ortouch the person when you hit,
and hitting should be on placeswhich are affected.
(14:20):
If I hit a wrestler in hisstomach, 100 kilograms BJJ or a
wrestler in his stomach, hewould just laugh and he would
say, oh, that's nice, but if Igo with my hands or fingers into
the ice which, by the way, youcan't train or go to the groin
hit to the groin to his groin,that's a different story.
(14:42):
And most of the times women aswell, like I'm not a woman, so I
cannot talk for a woman.
But a lot of times women said,told me like yeah, I can't do
anything because I'm, you know,one meter 60 and 50 kilograms.
What can I do to this, to this,to the aggressor, but believe
me, using the go with your nailsin my eyes?
(15:04):
it's over yeah, what would I do?
What would be my reaction?
So it would my natural reactionwould go to with my hands to
the ice and maybe have sometears and two or three minutes I
can't see anything recently,but that gives you time to run
away and these kind of stuff.
You should just train and when,but they don't teach you.
(15:25):
This is cool, and a lot oftimes you, we should decondition
ourselves because we're taughtnot to hurt anyone and which is
good.
But as you know, the world isnot only, doesn't only exist out
of a good guy.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
There are bad guys as well yeah, and, like you said,
hitting another person is soconfronting.
So, first of all, inspiring thefreestyle fighting, that's when
I get triggered.
But also when I have to.
You don't hit the other personbut you go as close as to
reality possible without hurtingthem.
(16:01):
But even that, tears arefalling down my cheeks.
And there is something elsethat I've experienced in Krav
Maga.
I've been talking about women.
I felt so held by masculineenergy in Krav Maga classes,
because my friends that don't doKrav Maga, they imagine that
(16:21):
it's a lot of tough guys that goto Krav Maga and actually it's
a lot of teddy bears that arefull of kindness that just learn
these techniques as well,because maybe they were
introverts or they absolutelyknow the fighting guys.
But then what's happening in theclasses?
They have to be the bad guysfor us, the women, so that we
can practice, because if I fighta woman that is 50 kilograms, I
(16:46):
will never actually be ready ifsomething was to happen in the
street.
But the guy with the big armsin class is going to have to do
as if he's attacking me, and Iknow it's confronting for them.
They don't want to do that to awoman, even in a class
environment.
It's challenging for them, butthey have to do it in order to
serve us, the feminine energy inthe space.
(17:09):
And there, for me, there islike beauty behind it.
You know, and that's the firsttime I experienced such a thing,
you know, like it, it's sort ofyeah, it's very interesting
yeah, it's very, because thatdepends as well on which society
you grew up in.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
For instance, in bulgaria, if you talk about
masculine or or feminine energy,they would look, they would
like.
What are you talking about?
Because here the conservative,these traditional values, where
the guy, the man, protects thewoman, is quite normal.
And it's normal because whenyou live in a rural country, in
the rural countryside, it'sabout sometimes the guys, the
(17:50):
men, is just better at doing theheavy work and if they see a
bear or whatever, normally theguy should go first and not the
woman to protect the woman, notthe other way around.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
We're going to talk about these bears in Bulgaria
when we're going to startaddressing the camps you
organized, because there is alsoa whole thing around that.
So let's talk about Krav Magateachers first.
First, because you wereemphasizing on the fact that we
should find a good teacher.
Like I actually started, Iactually tried nine krav maga
clubs wow I tried seven inperson and two I had a phone
(18:25):
call with, and it's when I metmy teacher in Barcelona.
I was like he's my maestro.
He is an incredible man with,so he has a very high level of
emotional intelligence.
He knows how to create safespaces.
He's incredible in terms oftechnique.
But there is so much morehappening in the class technique
(18:51):
, but there is so much morehappening in the class.
So can you talk a little bitmore about having and still,
you're still a teacher becausethere are still some krav maga
in your retreats right now buthaving had your club, what is
for you or what was for you veryimportant as a krav maga
teacher that you're like, I hadto bring that to the space.
That is non-negotiable.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
You talked about acting before in the Chroma
Class.
This is very important, people,and this comes in handy for you
Because, people, if you imitatea scenario, you play a scenario
where you have a scenario wherea woman is walking along the
(19:31):
alley and there are two guys whoare asking her for some money,
and you know how it goes, likewhat time is it and it's 9 pm,
it's dark, it's winter time,it's maybe in barcelona or
antwerp and we start the, theplay.
So this play, this scenario,it's very important to to play
it realistically and be seriousabout that.
(19:55):
No, you cannot say oh so no,it's worse, for it was laughing.
I was like no, you should playseriously to have a good
training.
So that's very important.
And the question about theteacher was the instructor, what
should?
Speaker 1 (20:07):
be what is a non-negotiable for you as a
teacher.
Like that you really shouldbring to the space, so that you
are a good teacher or that youare the best support for your
students possible yeah, ofcourse.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
First of all, it's not about me.
I don't have to prove anything.
I'm not the strongest guys inthe world, I will never be, so
it's about the ego thing, firstof all.
And second, realism.
It should be very realistically, and that means pressure, full
contact and no nonsense.
So sometimes it's not.
You have to yeah, just alwaysbe in tune with with the group,
(20:49):
because you can say, like now wehave a class where it's only
combatives and you really haveto hit.
Yeah, but if you see thatpeople don't feel safe or
they're like, oh, it's not forme, then okay, maybe you can
push them a little bit.
But if they say like we don'twant this, then you should
listen to that as well.
It's not always combatives ortechniques, but it's about other
(21:11):
stuff as well.
Yeah, like the pre-assault cuesof a potential aggressor.
What are the signs where youshould look for when there's a
threat?
A lot of people are not in tunewith their body, so they don't
see the potential threats.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
The pre-assault cues, yeah, you were talking about
actually the fact thataggressors have micro-sensors.
Yeah so what are a few examplesyou could give about us
becoming aware?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
oh, this is making me a target if I behave this way
or show this side of myself, orwhatever yes, first of all, you
have to acknowledge that younever would hurt a person like
that never, for no reason.
But there are crazy people whodo this and this is the first
realization that that there's abig difference in this mentality
(22:03):
.
So you should acknowledge that,okay, okay, I would never do
that, but there are people thatwould do this, so that's very
important to acknowledge that sowhat are the micro sensors that
they have and what are themicro behaviors maybe that we
portray, that make us a target?
(22:25):
Yeah, so have you ever feltuncomfortable in a fitness, in a
gym or in an elevator?
You have this veryuncomfortable feel when there's
a new person or coming passingby.
Have you ever felt?
Speaker 1 (22:40):
no, but I do have that very often when I walk in
the streets of brussels yes,okay.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
So we have an example .
Okay, it's not the fitness, butyou okay this kind of feeling.
When you have thisuncomfortable feeling, we often
tend to and we are angry atourselves, like why do I feel
this?
I don't want to feel this.
Oh no, it's not true.
And this person is justfollowing me and maybe it's not.
He's just looking for a vet forhis cat or whatever.
(23:07):
And we always try to in ourhead, try to downplay, downsize
our intuition, what our body istelling us.
But it should be the opposite.
We should listen to it insteadof just it's, it's fine, I trust
it.
The guy is he's fine, he's fine, but your body is like red flag
, red flag, he's like no.
So first of all, yeah, listento your, to the body, when it's
(23:28):
giving signals which, if it'snot okay for you and you can run
away from the situation, andthese kind of things are not.
I don't know whether it'sdeliberate, they are not taught
to us.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
Yeah, we are on the loud whisper takeover podcast.
It's all about intuition.
Nourish it, listen to it.
It is giving signals that wecannot ignore correct.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
Yeah, and it's not rocket science, it's just.
But nowadays it's all abouttherapy and words and but if I'm
on the streets and if I see twoguys and I don't trust it, I
just cross the street.
And it's not because I'm a KravMaga guy, like I see those two
guys, I can handle them.
No, I just cross over thestreet.
I don't want to have anytrouble, I don't want to have a
(24:10):
potential trouble, I just wantto go.
Yeah, I want to be safe and gohome.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
So Krav maga, self-defense, surviving in
hostile environments that couldbe a city, a country, a
particular moment.
You're also organizing outdoorsurvival camps and that's
another kind of survival.
Can you tell us more about whatwe actually do in those camps?
So it was our trips in bulgariaand how you also add some, or
sprinkle some Krav Maga in it.
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Yeah, so the tours that I organized in Bulgaria,
they are not really outdoorsurvival.
I mainly organized these campsin Belgium.
So it was a combo Krav Maga andoutdoor survival which is, in
my opinion, a very synergeticcombination.
And yeah, now in Bulgaria I'mplanning to organize these trips
(25:01):
, but I'm still because bulgariais a very wild country, very
untouched nature, a lot ofnature.
So first of all, I want to getto know the place better first
if I want to start organizingthese, these camps.
But I do organize for expat,digital nomads or just
(25:22):
Bulgarians here, workshops fortwo, three hours how to make a
fire, how to?
Just an introduction of KravMaga.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Did I also see on your Instagram something about
bears.
Are there bears in Bulgaria,right?
Speaker 2 (25:37):
There are currently more than a thousand bears in
Bulgaria and most of the timethey're more scared of humans
than we are scared of.
We should be scared of them.
Most of the times when theyhear us they run away.
But if they're hungry and theyshould feed the cubs and you
(26:01):
should meet them, then it's nota pleasant situation.
But yeah, you have more riskfor getting in a car accident,
to die in a car accident, thanto die from a bear attack.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
So we should not be scared to come on your tours and
your trips, because bears aredefinitely not a threat.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
No, no, no.
But there are some things whichwhich you can take into
consideration, like if you wantto go wild camping, yeah, if you
have like 10 sausages in yourcamp, don't you be surprised
that maybe there are like wildboars or wolves in your tent and
maybe a bear?
Speaker 1 (26:35):
it's about common sense, actually, and so you
sprinkle some krav magaactivities sometimes in in your
tent and maybe a bear.
It's about common sense,actually, and so you sprinkle
some Krav Maga activitiessometimes in your current trips,
but you're using it for fun.
You told me how are youincorporating it for fun, Like?
How is it like a team buildingexercise or what are you doing
with it?
Speaker 2 (26:51):
I go in Bulgaria, we visit places which are off the
beaten track and a lot of theseplaces are archaeological tombs
or from the traitions or fromancient civilizations, and these
kind of places are veryoverwhelming and it takes time
to process them, and sometimes Igive like a pat and people can
(27:14):
hit on the pat just to let offsome steam.
I don't know if you say this inenglish, but in dutch you say
this a storm of latin, but doyou say yeah, and I think this
is perfect combination, that youhave some moment for yourself,
you have downtime, you can be onyour own, you can, yeah,
contemplate, you can gaze intothe wild, and sometimes it's a
(27:39):
mix, in my opinion, of all thesedifferent kinds of activities
which makes it a full circle forthe experience.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Yeah, I love how you present that, because going into
another country there is a lotof new stimulus, new language,
new culture, culture, things totake in being outside of your
comfort zone and I am a bigmeditator, but you're right,
like there are moments, actuallysomething that is very physical
that makes you sweat.
It's also a way of processingand digesting information, or
(28:13):
yeah, that's, that's.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
That was only like.
Now they call it holisticallyto be like an holistic way, but
I always I'm not into one thing.
I think life should be exploredin many different ways.
I like to play music, I like todance, I like to, I mean fight,
I mean train how to defendmyself.
That maybe that's a betterexplanation.
And enjoy nature and yeah, thesekind of things are affecting in
(28:39):
my my trips.
Yeah it that it shouldn't befocused only mainly on one thing
, or like only on the trations,or only bulgaria it's about yeah
, we can.
It's about being together, thefood, it's about everything, and
uh, that's why, and and thisway, people feel more safe,
because nothing is required ofthem, it's nothing.
(28:59):
We can let go of all theseroles that we play, and that's
why people love these kind oftrips, because they feel like,
wow, they feel themselves, firstof all, and then second, they
feel accepted just the way theyare.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
In your Instagram posts.
It's like undeniable how yoursoul and your heart is vibrating
and is being touched bybulgarian culture, bulgarian
people, bulgarian nature.
Why did you move to bulgariaand what was that moment where
you thought you know what that'sit.
(29:33):
I gotta pack my bags andbulgaria it is.
I have to move.
I cannot stay in belgium.
I have to move.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
Yeah my name is.
I have different backgrounds Iknow I have canadian roots,
romanian roots, ukrainian orrussian, whatever.
Belgium, dutch, everything fromnorway.
I always knew from a kid, fromwhen I was little, yeah, that I
(29:58):
wanted to move to anothercountry because belgium for me
was a bit too boring, it was toosmall and and there was not a
lot of nature in belgium.
So and I always thought that,okay, I want to move to spain,
because spain was for me, like,yeah, I want to be like a don,
like a don on a finca and havemy oranges and my, my olive
(30:21):
trees and vineyard, whatever.
But then this pandemic hit andthings started to change and I
want to have more peace, more abit more freedom.
I want to experience morenature untouched, which is like
wild nature, not just some parksor whatever, but wild nature
(30:43):
and mountains, and where you canfeel lost and feel human again
and where the human, the naturalelements, are still in command.
And I booked a ticket for Spainin 2022, and five days prior,
(31:04):
something I don't know what,maybe YouTube, like promoting
Bulgaria, whatever and then Ibooked a ticket for Bulgaria
instead of Spain.
I went first three days inBulgaria.
I was like what the hell?
These people are very cold andlike typical Balkan people when
(31:24):
you ask them something, they'rejust like it's there.
You ask them something, it'sthere.
They don't laugh.
Then when you start to knowthem, you see that actually
they're very warm, they're verygenuine, they're very authentic
and I like this more than themore general american like, hi,
how are you?
And I'm generalizing, of course.
(31:45):
But the bulgarians, like they,have a very it's a crossroad.
It's crossroad from east, westand all different kind of
culture, and I think that's areflection of who I'm actually.
I'm not.
You cannot pinpoint me for onenationality.
And I went to bond school fivedays after I took the train from
burgos.
That's a reflection of who I amActually.
I'm not.
You cannot pinpoint me for onenationality.
And I went to Bansko five daysafter I took the train from
(32:06):
Burgas.
That's a seaside.
And then, yeah, I fell in lovewith Bansko.
On the first day that arrived Isaid, okay, I'm going to move
here, I'm going to live here,and then I went back, took my
car.
In three days I drove toBulgaria and I started without a
(32:27):
plan, which is not advisable.
But, yeah, I started even myown business.
But I was so scared in thebeginning because I didn't know
anything, I did not know anyone,I didn't know how to start a
business, especially in Bulgaria.
Come on, it's a serial alphabetand no network, no business
(32:50):
idea plan.
But I told myself, okay, if Iwant to really integrate in this
country, I should do thingsdifferently than the average
expat, which means avoidingspeaking English.
Now I speak English withBulgarian accent, which is quite
(33:12):
normal because I only speakDutch or Bulgarian nowadays, but
I do it on purpose, because Idon't want to.
Yeah, I want to reallyintegrate, which means learning
the language, and Geren is adifferent, difficult language,
but as well, yeah, networkingwith local, with the local
population.
And what I see a lot of peopledo is that they yeah the comfort
(33:35):
zones and say they see peoplewho speak English and they and
they, they, they stay and theyspeak english, or they go to the
expert community, which is verynormal because it's safety.
It's about safety again, andpeople want to feel safe and
they want to feel they want tosee familiar things.
So what I did is I went intothe fear, into the combats, like
you did on training, and, yeah,nowadays I can communicate with
(34:00):
the people.
I started to like a madman.
I started to study Bulgarianevery day, like at least for an
hour, and I look like, go toYouTube buying a lot of
different books, the best onlineclasses.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
So it's that's the other thing that I'm doing yeah,
but you had this intuition,like literally the first day you
arrived in bulgaria.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
You were like, yeah, I'm gonna move here yeah, and
not the first day, first twodays like these are weird people
.
They are so cold and warm in inin the same, at the same, in
the same way.
A lot of people, I think, havethis first impression of
bulgarians that are quitedistant and a bit weird.
They're not the best, theydon't have this typical western
(34:53):
service oriented way of doingthings, but they're quite
service oriented in, but intheirs, in their way, in their
authentic way.
Yeah, like the local market inbansko.
The local markets with like thefresh fruit and like people are
super gentle and kind and yeahit's like they're almost sharing
(35:14):
, like the vegetables from theirgarden in the market and they,
they don't talk, but you giveyou a present or one of their
vegetables that they grew intheir own garden, and this, this
, these things are for me they,they represent more than, uh,
just words.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Yeah and also the love for animals.
Like barnsco is full of streetdogs, full of street cats, but
they somehow belong to everyone,like they will feed them as
well, and there is like a senseof community around that as well
.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Yeah, the street animals and the stray dogs and
stray cats, Well yeah, theynourish, they replenish your
soul and, like a therapy, youdon't need to pay a therapist,
you can just uh hang around inthe city square and then you can
just uh hang around in the citysquare and you can just hang
around with the stray dogs andstray cats anybody who's
(36:05):
listening.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
If you're gonna follow sergi on instagram, you
will always see an instagramstory where he found a new cat
friend that just like, snuggledinto his lab and spent the
afternoon there, which isabsolutely so cute yeah, and it
calms, it soothes down yournervous system, and in the west
we're continuously, we are,we're overstressed, we, we are,
(36:27):
we are hurrying just to havesome rest.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah, so this kind of society wasn't for me and
that's why I'm here in bulgaria,which everything is more laid
back, relaxed and my immunesystem can relax here more, and,
which is for me one of the mostimportant things to feel safe
and safety.
When there is safety, you canlive again.
You don't have to go intosurvival mode every day, like I
(36:52):
was in the west.
I was continuously in survivalmode and I rushed back to home
just to have some peace of mindand rest.
Speaker 1 (37:01):
Yeah, so you would say that bulgaria offers you
both a physical safe space andalso a more emotionally safe
space yes, here the that's true.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
The people are, they are, they don't care.
They don't care what you do,how you look like and and
therefore there's less.
Uh, ego is a good thing, butnot the ego which is I don't
know how you call it which islike a blown up ego.
How do you call it Blown up?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
Yeah, yeah, like a big ego, like we're inflated, an
inflated ego.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Yeah, an inflated ego just to, yeah, just to hide
their insecurities, this kind ofego, and you don't have that.
Obviously, you have thateverywhere, but here it's less.
And yeah, just to hide theirinsecurities, this kind of ego,
and here you don't have that.
Obviously, you have thateverywhere, but here is less and
there are less people.
So you have more space and yeah, and I just wish that for
everyone.
This safety, it's veryimportant, because it's not all
(37:55):
about the universe and this, andthat it's about reality as well
.
In Krav Maga as well, youcannot wish when there's an
aggressor, you cannot wish thisperson away when he's attacking
you.
You have to do something.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
You're learning Bulgarian, you're running your
own business.
Now you want to integrate insociety.
You do everything to integratein society, not to be just and
only with the expat community.
I've moved countries many times.
Also loud whisper intuitionsaying may cindy pack your bags
and you go.
I think a lot of people fromthe outside always look at it oh
(38:30):
my god, it's amazing and theyromanticize the idea of moving
country.
But it actually comes with alot of challenges and those
challenges are both andprofessional and just personal,
like finding a new group offriends and stuff.
Can we first talk about youfinding new friends and a circle
of people that you feel like?
Oh, you know what?
I'm becoming closer and closerwith these people and they
(38:53):
they're becoming my local tribehere yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
So the famous uh gabber mate psychotherapist,
gamut gamut day is talking abouttwo very important instincts.
So the first instinct is tobelong in a group, yeah.
And the second importantinstinct is to be authentic in
your own way.
And most of the times insociety, they, they, they clash.
(39:19):
So what a lot of people do.
They give up their ownindividuality, their identity,
their authenticity to belong ina group, but that doesn't make
you happy in the end.
So what a lot of people do,just to belong, they go where.
Yeah, they go where when.
If there's people speakingenglish, they just automatically
(39:39):
go there, which is not a badthing, but they do that most of
the times subconsciously, justto belong.
And I realized this like, okay,but I want to learn bulgarian as
well, I want to integrate, so Iwant to be authentic to myself.
So I said to myself okay, somaybe you're going to be back in
the days.
Was was like a couple of wordsand sentences and that was it.
(40:24):
So I felt I didn't have a likea very in-depth conversation in
the beginning, and that's, youfeel lonely too.
Sometimes you just want to talkin your own native language.
Uh, but I knew I, I I putthrough and I said to myself,
okay, I, I the word.
The rewards of the languagewe're learning, the bulgarian,
will be amazing after a coupleof months, at least a couple, a
(40:48):
half a year.
And I can give you an example I,I, I saw, I, I saw, when I
passed by the, the town hall, Isaw a, a lot of people dancing
in the town hall and I was like,oh, they're doing folk dancing.
I want to do that too, but I'mscared.
I don't know where to go.
I don't understand where I haveto find this kind of
(41:09):
information.
Who should I ask?
Everything is Bulgarian and noexpat or nomad have done these
dances, these classes.
So I went just in the town andI just spoke to anyone and like,
asked them like, hey, where canI learn how to dance?
And they were looking at melike you're a foreigner and it's
(41:30):
you're the first one who wasasking you.
It's weird.
So I felt a bit awkward.
But then in the end I found theteacher and she said to me like
, unfortunately there are nobeginners classes, but they are
intermediate classes and you canjoin and you can see.
I'm like, oh, okay, I thoughtbeginners, okay, I can handle
that, but now intermediate.
So I went to the firstintermediate class and everyone
(41:53):
was looking like what is thisBlanca guy doing here?
He's not Bulgarian, it's veryobvious.
So I felt everyone is lookingat me, I felt uncomfortable and
I thought that's normal.
I have to scan my environment.
It's the first time that I wasthere in this group and will
they accept me?
You know all these basic fearsand I said to myself I just will
(42:17):
shut up, I will just learn thedance, just attend the classes.
And yeah, now I'm like in my15th class and some people say
like now you can lead the classfor a joke because I am like.
They say like hey, you're likeBulgarian, dance like a
Bulgarian.
So I created this safety, thissafe space for myself and I I
(42:41):
think most of the time people,when they move to another
country, they're looking for,for a safe space and then they,
they look good, they go for thefamiliar things, the, the
western culture where I grew upin and you grew up in.
So everything that is yeah, notthat culture is like strange
and scared of the unknown.
(43:03):
Yeah, that's uh, I, Iintuitively know these kind of
things, but sometimes you haveto.
It's too much and you have tobuild in safe spaces like for
yourself.
Maybe there's some advice forpeople want to move and want to
integrate.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Yeah, and for me that's such a beautiful story
because obviously I am a dancer,I have a background as a dancer
and dance allowed me to buildmany friendships around the
world and obviously you notbeing a professional dancer at
all but dance is a way toconnect to another human being
on a soul level and for methat's also a magnificent story
(43:43):
of how powerful just dance isyeah, you don't have to use
words, right yeah, exactly, oh,it's, uh, yeah yeah, it's things
I can recommend if you want to.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
Most of the times, like this typical western way
like, yeah, I should go to aclassroom and and go attend to a
class, and that, and and and.
This way I can, I can integrate, and that's it.
But no, it's about this kind ofthing as well.
Yeah, but you have to gothrough the fear bubble and yeah
, sometimes it's too much, andthen you go to your safe space
(44:16):
and then you can go back, notalways pushing yourself, because
there's like a toxic resiliencymovement going on as well.
Like, yeah, you should push andpush.
Yes, that's true, but sometimesyou have to listen to yourself.
And, yeah, cuddle with cats andgo to take a warm bath instead
of a cold bath, which is finetoo, to do that.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
Thank you so much, ser sergi, for sharing your
story, your thoughts.
If people want to know moreabout your tours in bulgaria or
want to be coached because Iknow that you coach people as
well on how to go and live there, where can they find you on
instagram so my instagram handleis sergey underscore bulgaria
(44:58):
and the website is wwwauthenticslash bulgaria dot com.
I'll definitely share it in theepisode notes as well.
Thank you so much, sergei, forthis beautiful interview.
Speaker 2 (45:12):
Thank you for the space of giving me the space to
talk.
Welcome to the Loud Whisper Takeover podcast.
Today we will talk about KravMaga, which is a self-defense
practice, and have a specialguest with me because I want to
actually explore what Krav Magahas to do with love, compassion
and personal development.
I give you a little bit ofcontext.
I started Krav Maga as anaction actress, thinking I will
(00:22):
learn some self-defense things,because there are elements of
boxing, brazilian jiu-jitsu welearn to defend ourselves
against weapons and as an actionactress, those are great skills
to have.
However, during training,you'll learn things that go
against your instinct of notwanting to harm other people.
I started crying many times inclass.
(00:45):
I did not expect that, andanother journey began.
I became aware that there wasphysical healing that was taking
place on a cellular level.
I became present to.
I was learning about giving andreceiving love and being in the
presence of supportivemasculine energy.
I met an amazing human being inBulgaria.
(01:07):
He is organizing outdoorsurvival in Krav Maga camps in
forests and mountains themountains of Bulgaria.
He's dedicated to creating safespaces for groups that he takes
with him on these journeys.
He is really dedicated tocreate spaces where there is
respect, responsibility,integrity.
There's a lot ofself-reflection going on.
(01:30):
He is the founder of AuthenticBulgaria.
Sergei Bulgaria.
Welcome.
Welcome, sergei.
How are you doing?
Speaker 2 (01:39):
That's a great introduction.
We can stop the podcast now.
It was the great, the greatestintroduction.
Yeah, I cannot any add anything.
So, yeah, my name is sergeybulgaria.
I'm currently a tour guide inbulgaria and organize
small-scale tours in ruralbulgaria for people who are fed
(02:01):
up with, uh, you know, the masstourism and when they go on a
holiday they don't want to betreated like a number.
So I bring them to places offthe beaten track so they can
feel seen and welcome.
And currently I don't teachKrav Maga because I'm injured,
(02:26):
injured, but sometimes there aresome Krav Maga elements in the
tours that are organized,because it's only sightseeing is
sometimes a bit boring, sopeople can can let the let off
the steam awesome, and so wewill talk about your tours in
Bulgaria as well, becausethere's something very beautiful
about it.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
But first, maybe for listeners that don't really know
what Krav Maga is, can we givethem a little bit of an
explanation of how you see whatKrav Maga is.
Can we give them a little bitof an explanation of how you see
what Krav Maga is?
Because, also, you are that guythat loves cuddling cats.
You are a cuddler, you lovekindness, you're a very
compassionate human being.
Yet you became a Krav Magapractitioner.
(03:00):
You had a Krav Maga club aswell in Belgium when you used to
live in Belgium.
Yeah, how do you see Krav Magaand you know its relationship to
violence, perhaps, and how you,as a very kind guy, got
involved into that yeah, I thinkmaybe people can relate.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
I grew up in a small village at the seaside, very,
very cozy, in Belgium, and thenI, when I turned 18, 19, I had
to study in a big city, antwerpand antwerp is a very noisy city
.
A lot of things are happeningat the same time and me I went
with my naive personality.
I went into the big city and Ididn't know what a university
(03:40):
was because I had to go to myfirst day and I looked around
and I wanted to ask people, butI didn't feel safe and I never
had this feeling like why Idon't, why I don't feel safe.
And then I see all these people,loud, outgoing, and and yeah,
not so polite or friendly thanin cozy village, where I grew up
(04:02):
.
I experienced a lot of unsafetyin my body and I didn't want to
have this.
I wanted to feel safe again.
So then I started the journeylike, okay, what should you do
when you don't feel safe?
Maybe you should do some boxing, whatever, I want to do some
taekwondo.
But I feel like I felt like ina realistic situation on the
(04:22):
streets, when there's a big guycoming up to you, what should
you do?
I really wanted to know what Ishould do, what I could do in
this kind of situation.
So then came Krav Maga, and KravMaga was for me, the right
(04:44):
thing to learn at that timebecause I really wanted to know
like things that are common,handy, like very useful,
effective on the streets.
So no, blah, blah.
And okay, I subscribed in myfirst class and I was a bit
intimidated by the big guys,obviously, because they were
like they weren't talking a lotand they were like very big and
(05:06):
my first class like hello, harry, nate, hello, how are you?
And there was some guys,ukrainian guys, and they say
hello, you know hello.
And they just did the exercise.
We did the exercise, but theywere not nice to me, they were
just it was you know howKramagai.
It's very realistic.
It depends which which Kramaga.
It's very realistic, it dependswhich Kramaga class you're
attending to.
But it was full contact, sothat meant half the class, a lot
(05:35):
of blueses, pain, aches.
But I said to myself like Ireally like this.
And then my journey started andafter 10 years I decided to
start my own club in Knokke.
But now I moved to Bulgaria somy club doesn't exist anymore.
But yeah, the hands-on thingwhat to do in a situation where
(05:58):
you don't feel safe it should betaught in school.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
Actually, that's my opinion, opinion, and so you
were talking about the fact thatyou didn't feel safe in the big
city.
Was it a true sense of notfeeling physically safe, or was
it both emotional and physical?
What did you?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
think.
I think it's both.
It's an end story due topersonal.
Everyone has his own story.
Traumas, blah, blah, blah.
It's a big thing now, but somethings are true about trauma and
, yeah, as well, physicallynever did, only did some soccer,
played some soccer, but neverwas into this.
(06:40):
It's a small world, thismartial art world.
Maybe I'm generalizing, buteveryone has tattoos, has a bald
head, a haircut and looksaggressive.
Yeah, like you that's me.
You don't look aggressive.
But, yeah, the big tough guy,typical tough guy and yeah, I'm
(07:00):
not that guy, but I still wantedto learn how to defend myself
and it didn't stop with thecrowd maga did some wrestling,
did some bjj boxing, so it's.
But that's what's crowd magaall about.
You don't want to um, you knowyou don't want to to show off
what your skills.
You want to show to the outsideworld that you know you.
(07:24):
You're not a fighter.
But when they make a problem,then, yeah, they feel it inside
that they feel this calm energy,and so they don't want pick you
as a victim on the streets orwhatever.
It's very important, it's aboutenergy as well.
They, yeah, they choose theprey, the what do you call?
Speaker 1 (07:43):
called someone who's yeah, the prey their target but
the one who is hunting, thehunter yeah, the bad guy, I
don't know that's called the badguy.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
They have, like a sensor, microseconds.
They can see whether you're aneasy victim or not and they
check everything.
It's based upon microseconds.
They can see whether you're aneasy victim or not and they
check everything.
It's based upon microseconds.
Where they have this sensor andit's okay, okay, no, this is a
not so easy target.
This is a crazy woman.
This is a crazy girl.
Oh, let's find another one.
(08:17):
So it starts with that and Ifelt that back in the days like
I was easy target.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
I want to just bounce back on a few things that
you've said.
So, first of all, would youagree if I summarize what Krav
Maga could be for those thathave never really seen it in
action?
Number one is self-defense, soit's not about attacking.
It's if a threat is coming toyou, you know how to respond.
Number two it's aboutde-escalating first.
(08:43):
If you can avoid any problems,you avoid it at all costs.
Number three is it's not aboutfighting and staying in the
fight for minutes or hours.
It's how can I basically giveone punch, two punches, but how
can I, as fast as possible,learn a technique where I
(09:04):
neutralize or hit my opponentand I have just the time to run
away?
Would that be something thatsummarizes it well?
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Yeah, that's correct, and nowadays you see a lot of
YouTube videos which are quitespectacular, but that's not the
case.
I attended the school, europeanKrav Maga Academy in Antwerp,
and the owner, luc van Laar, isa very no-nonsense guy, so he
doesn't care about stripes,about anything, he just wants to
.
You know, he just wants to getthe deal done and the deal is to
(09:36):
come out of safe, out of apotential threatening situation.
So it's not only the physicalpart, it is as well
de-escalation and that's a lotof.
That's verbally as well andpsychologically as well, because
you have to, you have to actunder pressure, and this is you
(09:56):
have to train this in arealistic way.
You cannot only talk about it,and that's why a lot of people
don't want to go to a Krav Magaclass because, yeah, they want
to learn the stuff, but in avery innocent way.
If the club, the Karmagak club,is a safe environment, that
means that the instructor shouldalways check every person if
(10:25):
they are training, because it'sfull contact.
If someone's hit or someone hasa trauma reaction or whatever,
they should stop the class.
You can push yourself a littlebit, that's true, but it has a
lot to do with the traumareactions of the body as well
and, in my opinion, a lot ofinstructors in the past.
(10:46):
They don't take into this intoconsideration.
They only want to have the yeah, the Superman badass.
It's not only about that.
It's maybe 30, 40%.
It's about the physical partand about the legal part of the
role.
What if, if you hit someone onthe head and you run away and
(11:09):
this person is injured for therest of her life, you should pay
, whatever the cameras did youhit first.
So these are all serious thingsto take into consideration and
that's why it's not only hittingon a ball or on a pad.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, because we learn techniques that literally,
like you say, can harm or hurtpeople for life, or they could
be blind forever, or even, likeKrav Maga, can teach you these
tools as well.
It's to be taken veryprecautiously and there's a lot
of responsibility that comeswith it.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah.
So that's why, if you're intoself-defense, go to a Krav Maga
club.
However, always stay true toyourself and feel whether you
feel safe enough, intuitively,with the instructor and the
atmosphere, and it should berealistic.
There are a couple of bulletpoints, criteria for a decent
(12:06):
Krav Maga, and it doesn't stopwith the Krav Maga.
If I would have done only KravMaga without at least have some
wrestling or BJJ experience, youhave to know what's going on
nowadays with the young people.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
And I just want to clarify the jargon for people
that maybe are less familiarwith martial arts.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
So BJJ is Brazilian jiu-jitsu in case some listeners
don't know it yeah, sometimeswe call like if you see two men
cuddling on the mat, it'sprobably bjj women.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Yeah yeah, I would not bounce back on the fact that
you were talking about traumareactions of the body because,
as I said, I started krav magaas an actress, wanting to learn
stuff for my action actingmovies.
I've started crying many timesin class and it's especially
sparring, so freestyle fightingright.
(12:57):
So all of a sudden the teachersays, okay, here we go for one
minute or 30 seconds, let's go.
It's soft sparring, but still Ihave my reaction Like there was
something on a cellular levelthat I cannot control, that came
out, that I had to become awareof, and so now there's a new
journey of healing that isstarting with it.
Have you had to overcome anychallenges on the beginning of
(13:22):
your journey or when you hadyour club in knokke?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
in belgium.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
Have you seen or experienced something alike with
students, maybe that you couldshare or want?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
to share.
A lot of times people freeze ora lot.
Most of the times people saythe people my niche, the, my
target audience were the peoplewere more a bit more shy,
introverted and people whothought that they would never
learn a martial art in theirlife because they're like
nothing for me and they're onlythe tough guys.
(13:56):
This was my target audience.
And then most of the timepeople said yeah, but I don't
want to hurt the other person.
But then I emphasized that okay, this is a safe environment,
you don't have to hit the person, but at least train your memory
muscle to hit the person ortouch the person when you hit,
and hitting should be on placeswhich are affected.
(14:20):
If I hit a wrestler in hisstomach, 100 kilograms BJJ or a
wrestler in his stomach, hewould just laugh and he would
say, oh, that's nice, but if Igo with my hands or fingers into
the ice which, by the way, youcan't train or go to the groin
hit to the groin to his groin,that's a different story.
(14:42):
And most of the times women aswell, like I'm not a woman, so I
cannot talk for a woman.
But a lot of times women said,told me like yeah, I can't do
anything because I'm, you know,one meter 60 and 50 kilograms.
What can I do to this, to this,to the aggressor, but believe
me, using the go with your nailsin my eyes?
(15:04):
it's over yeah, what would I do?
What would be my reaction?
So it would my natural reactionwould go to with my hands to
the ice and maybe have sometears and two or three minutes I
can't see anything recently,but that gives you time to run
away and these kind of stuff.
You should just train and when,but they don't teach you.
(15:25):
This is cool, and a lot oftimes you, we should decondition
ourselves because we're taughtnot to hurt anyone and which is
good.
But as you know, the world isnot only, doesn't only exist out
of a good guy.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
There are bad guys as well yeah, and, like you said,
hitting another person is soconfronting.
So, first of all, inspiring thefreestyle fighting, that's when
I get triggered.
But also when I have to.
You don't hit the other personbut you go as close as to
reality possible without hurtingthem.
(16:01):
But even that, tears arefalling down my cheeks.
And there is something elsethat I've experienced in Krav
Maga.
I've been talking about women.
I felt so held by masculineenergy in Krav Maga classes,
because my friends that don't doKrav Maga, they imagine that
(16:21):
it's a lot of tough guys that goto Krav Maga and actually it's
a lot of teddy bears that arefull of kindness that just learn
these techniques as well,because maybe they were
introverts or they absolutelyknow the fighting guys.
But then what's happening in theclasses?
They have to be the bad guysfor us, the women, so that we
can practice, because if I fighta woman that is 50 kilograms, I
(16:46):
will never actually be ready ifsomething was to happen in the
street.
But the guy with the big armsin class is going to have to do
as if he's attacking me, and Iknow it's confronting for them.
They don't want to do that to awoman, even in a class
environment.
It's challenging for them, butthey have to do it in order to
serve us, the feminine energy inthe space.
(17:09):
And there, for me, there islike beauty behind it.
You know, and that's the firsttime I experienced such a thing,
you know, like it, it's sort ofyeah, it's very interesting
yeah, it's very, because thatdepends as well on which society
you grew up in.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
For instance, in bulgaria, if you talk about
masculine or or feminine energy,they would look, they would
like.
What are you talking about?
Because here the conservative,these traditional values, where
the guy, the man, protects thewoman, is quite normal.
And it's normal because whenyou live in a rural country, in
the rural countryside, it'sabout sometimes the guys, the
(17:50):
men, is just better at doing theheavy work and if they see a
bear or whatever, normally theguy should go first and not the
woman to protect the woman, notthe other way around.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
We're going to talk about these bears in Bulgaria
when we're going to startaddressing the camps you
organized, because there is alsoa whole thing around that.
So let's talk about Krav Magateachers first.
First, because you wereemphasizing on the fact that we
should find a good teacher.
Like I actually started, Iactually tried nine krav maga
clubs wow I tried seven inperson and two I had a phone
(18:25):
call with, and it's when I metmy teacher in Barcelona.
I was like he's my maestro.
He is an incredible man with,so he has a very high level of
emotional intelligence.
He knows how to create safespaces.
He's incredible in terms oftechnique.
But there is so much morehappening in the class technique
(18:51):
, but there is so much morehappening in the class.
So can you talk a little bitmore about having and still,
you're still a teacher becausethere are still some krav maga
in your retreats right now buthaving had your club, what is
for you or what was for you veryimportant as a krav maga
teacher that you're like, I hadto bring that to the space.
That is non-negotiable.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
You talked about acting before in the Chroma
Class.
This is very important, people,and this comes in handy for you
Because, people, if you imitatea scenario, you play a scenario
where you have a scenario wherea woman is walking along the
(19:31):
alley and there are two guys whoare asking her for some money,
and you know how it goes, likewhat time is it and it's 9 pm,
it's dark, it's winter time,it's maybe in barcelona or
antwerp and we start the, theplay.
So this play, this scenario,it's very important to to play
it realistically and be seriousabout that.
(19:55):
No, you cannot say oh so no,it's worse, for it was laughing.
I was like no, you should playseriously to have a good
training.
So that's very important.
And the question about theteacher was the instructor, what
should?
Speaker 1 (20:07):
be what is a non-negotiable for you as a
teacher.
Like that you really shouldbring to the space, so that you
are a good teacher or that youare the best support for your
students possible yeah, ofcourse.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
First of all, it's not about me.
I don't have to prove anything.
I'm not the strongest guys inthe world, I will never be, so
it's about the ego thing, firstof all.
And second, realism.
It should be very realistically, and that means pressure, full
contact and no nonsense.
So sometimes it's not.
You have to yeah, just alwaysbe in tune with with the group,
(20:49):
because you can say, like now wehave a class where it's only
combatives and you really haveto hit.
Yeah, but if you see thatpeople don't feel safe or
they're like, oh, it's not forme, then okay, maybe you can
push them a little bit.
But if they say like we don'twant this, then you should
listen to that as well.
It's not always combatives ortechniques, but it's about other
(21:11):
stuff as well.
Yeah, like the pre-assault cuesof a potential aggressor.
What are the signs where youshould look for when there's a
threat?
A lot of people are not in tunewith their body, so they don't
see the potential threats.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
The pre-assault cues, yeah, you were talking about
actually the fact thataggressors have micro-sensors.
Yeah so what are a few examplesyou could give about us
becoming aware?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
oh, this is making me a target if I behave this way
or show this side of myself, orwhatever yes, first of all, you
have to acknowledge that younever would hurt a person like
that never, for no reason.
But there are crazy people whodo this and this is the first
realization that that there's abig difference in this mentality
(22:03):
.
So you should acknowledge that,okay, okay, I would never do
that, but there are people thatwould do this, so that's very
important to acknowledge that sowhat are the micro sensors that
they have and what are themicro behaviors maybe that we
portray, that make us a target?
(22:25):
Yeah, so have you ever feltuncomfortable in a fitness, in a
gym or in an elevator?
You have this veryuncomfortable feel when there's
a new person or coming passingby.
Have you ever felt?
Speaker 1 (22:40):
no, but I do have that very often when I walk in
the streets of brussels yes,okay.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
So we have an example .
Okay, it's not the fitness, butyou okay this kind of feeling.
When you have thisuncomfortable feeling, we often
tend to and we are angry atourselves, like why do I feel
this?
I don't want to feel this.
Oh no, it's not true.
And this person is justfollowing me and maybe it's not.
He's just looking for a vet forhis cat or whatever.
(23:07):
And we always try to in ourhead, try to downplay, downsize
our intuition, what our body istelling us.
But it should be the opposite.
We should listen to it insteadof just it's, it's fine, I trust
it.
The guy is he's fine, he's fine, but your body is like red flag
, red flag, he's like no.
So first of all, yeah, listento your, to the body, when it's
(23:28):
giving signals which, if it'snot okay for you and you can run
away from the situation, andthese kind of things are not.
I don't know whether it'sdeliberate, they are not taught
to us.
Speaker 1 (23:38):
Yeah, we are on the loud whisper takeover podcast.
It's all about intuition.
Nourish it, listen to it.
It is giving signals that wecannot ignore correct.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
Yeah, and it's not rocket science, it's just.
But nowadays it's all abouttherapy and words and but if I'm
on the streets and if I see twoguys and I don't trust it, I
just cross the street.
And it's not because I'm a KravMaga guy, like I see those two
guys, I can handle them.
No, I just cross over thestreet.
I don't want to have anytrouble, I don't want to have a
(24:10):
potential trouble, I just wantto go.
Yeah, I want to be safe and gohome.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
So Krav maga, self-defense, surviving in
hostile environments that couldbe a city, a country, a
particular moment.
You're also organizing outdoorsurvival camps and that's
another kind of survival.
Can you tell us more about whatwe actually do in those camps?
So it was our trips in bulgariaand how you also add some, or
sprinkle some Krav Maga in it.
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Yeah, so the tours that I organized in Bulgaria,
they are not really outdoorsurvival.
I mainly organized these campsin Belgium.
So it was a combo Krav Maga andoutdoor survival which is, in
my opinion, a very synergeticcombination.
And yeah, now in Bulgaria I'mplanning to organize these trips
(25:01):
, but I'm still because bulgariais a very wild country, very
untouched nature, a lot ofnature.
So first of all, I want to getto know the place better first
if I want to start organizingthese, these camps.
But I do organize for expat,digital nomads or just
(25:22):
Bulgarians here, workshops fortwo, three hours how to make a
fire, how to?
Just an introduction of KravMaga.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Did I also see on your Instagram something about
bears.
Are there bears in Bulgaria,right?
Speaker 2 (25:37):
There are currently more than a thousand bears in
Bulgaria and most of the timethey're more scared of humans
than we are scared of.
We should be scared of them.
Most of the times when theyhear us they run away.
But if they're hungry and theyshould feed the cubs and you
(26:01):
should meet them, then it's nota pleasant situation.
But yeah, you have more riskfor getting in a car accident,
to die in a car accident, thanto die from a bear attack.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
So we should not be scared to come on your tours and
your trips, because bears aredefinitely not a threat.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
No, no, no.
But there are some things whichwhich you can take into
consideration, like if you wantto go wild camping, yeah, if you
have like 10 sausages in yourcamp, don't you be surprised
that maybe there are like wildboars or wolves in your tent and
maybe a bear?
Speaker 1 (26:35):
it's about common sense, actually, and so you
sprinkle some krav magaactivities sometimes in in your
tent and maybe a bear.
It's about common sense,actually, and so you sprinkle
some Krav Maga activitiessometimes in your current trips,
but you're using it for fun.
You told me how are youincorporating it for fun, Like?
How is it like a team buildingexercise or what are you doing
with it?
Speaker 2 (26:51):
I go in Bulgaria, we visit places which are off the
beaten track and a lot of theseplaces are archaeological tombs
or from the traitions or fromancient civilizations, and these
kind of places are veryoverwhelming and it takes time
to process them, and sometimes Igive like a pat and people can
(27:14):
hit on the pat just to let offsome steam.
I don't know if you say this inenglish, but in dutch you say
this a storm of latin, but doyou say yeah, and I think this
is perfect combination, that youhave some moment for yourself,
you have downtime, you can be onyour own, you can, yeah,
contemplate, you can gaze intothe wild, and sometimes it's a
(27:39):
mix, in my opinion, of all thesedifferent kinds of activities
which makes it a full circle forthe experience.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Yeah, I love how you present that, because going into
another country there is a lotof new stimulus, new language,
new culture, culture, things totake in being outside of your
comfort zone and I am a bigmeditator, but you're right,
like there are moments, actuallysomething that is very physical
that makes you sweat.
It's also a way of processingand digesting information, or
(28:13):
yeah, that's, that's.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
That was only like.
Now they call it holisticallyto be like an holistic way, but
I always I'm not into one thing.
I think life should be exploredin many different ways.
I like to play music, I like todance, I like to, I mean fight,
I mean train how to defendmyself.
That maybe that's a betterexplanation.
And enjoy nature and yeah, thesekind of things are affecting in
(28:39):
my my trips.
Yeah it that it shouldn't befocused only mainly on one thing
, or like only on the trations,or only bulgaria it's about yeah
, we can.
It's about being together, thefood, it's about everything, and
uh, that's why, and and thisway, people feel more safe,
because nothing is required ofthem, it's nothing.
(28:59):
We can let go of all theseroles that we play, and that's
why people love these kind oftrips, because they feel like,
wow, they feel themselves, firstof all, and then second, they
feel accepted just the way theyare.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
In your Instagram posts.
It's like undeniable how yoursoul and your heart is vibrating
and is being touched bybulgarian culture, bulgarian
people, bulgarian nature.
Why did you move to bulgariaand what was that moment where
you thought you know what that'sit.
(29:33):
I gotta pack my bags andbulgaria it is.
I have to move.
I cannot stay in belgium.
I have to move.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
Yeah my name is.
I have different backgrounds Iknow I have canadian roots,
romanian roots, ukrainian orrussian, whatever.
Belgium, dutch, everything fromnorway.
I always knew from a kid, fromwhen I was little, yeah, that I
(29:58):
wanted to move to anothercountry because belgium for me
was a bit too boring, it was toosmall and and there was not a
lot of nature in belgium.
So and I always thought that,okay, I want to move to spain,
because spain was for me, like,yeah, I want to be like a don,
like a don on a finca and havemy oranges and my, my olive
(30:21):
trees and vineyard, whatever.
But then this pandemic hit andthings started to change and I
want to have more peace, more abit more freedom.
I want to experience morenature untouched, which is like
wild nature, not just some parksor whatever, but wild nature
(30:43):
and mountains, and where you canfeel lost and feel human again
and where the human, the naturalelements, are still in command.
And I booked a ticket for Spainin 2022, and five days prior,
(31:04):
something I don't know what,maybe YouTube, like promoting
Bulgaria, whatever and then Ibooked a ticket for Bulgaria
instead of Spain.
I went first three days inBulgaria.
I was like what the hell?
These people are very cold andlike typical Balkan people when
(31:24):
you ask them something, they'rejust like it's there.
You ask them something, it'sthere.
They don't laugh.
Then when you start to knowthem, you see that actually
they're very warm, they're verygenuine, they're very authentic
and I like this more than themore general american like, hi,
how are you?
And I'm generalizing, of course.
(31:45):
But the bulgarians, like they,have a very it's a crossroad.
It's crossroad from east, westand all different kind of
culture, and I think that's areflection of who I'm actually.
I'm not.
You cannot pinpoint me for onenationality.
And I went to bond school fivedays after I took the train from
burgos.
That's a reflection of who I amActually.
I'm not.
You cannot pinpoint me for onenationality.
And I went to Bansko five daysafter I took the train from
(32:06):
Burgas.
That's a seaside.
And then, yeah, I fell in lovewith Bansko.
On the first day that arrived Isaid, okay, I'm going to move
here, I'm going to live here,and then I went back, took my
car.
In three days I drove toBulgaria and I started without a
(32:27):
plan, which is not advisable.
But, yeah, I started even myown business.
But I was so scared in thebeginning because I didn't know
anything, I did not know anyone,I didn't know how to start a
business, especially in Bulgaria.
Come on, it's a serial alphabetand no network, no business
(32:50):
idea plan.
But I told myself, okay, if Iwant to really integrate in this
country, I should do thingsdifferently than the average
expat, which means avoidingspeaking English.
Now I speak English withBulgarian accent, which is quite
(33:12):
normal because I only speakDutch or Bulgarian nowadays, but
I do it on purpose, because Idon't want to.
Yeah, I want to reallyintegrate, which means learning
the language, and Geren is adifferent, difficult language,
but as well, yeah, networkingwith local, with the local
population.
And what I see a lot of peopledo is that they yeah the comfort
(33:35):
zones and say they see peoplewho speak English and they and
they, they, they stay and theyspeak english, or they go to the
expert community, which is verynormal because it's safety.
It's about safety again, andpeople want to feel safe and
they want to feel they want tosee familiar things.
So what I did is I went intothe fear, into the combats, like
you did on training, and, yeah,nowadays I can communicate with
(34:00):
the people.
I started to like a madman.
I started to study Bulgarianevery day, like at least for an
hour, and I look like, go toYouTube buying a lot of
different books, the best onlineclasses.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
So it's that's the other thing that I'm doing yeah,
but you had this intuition,like literally the first day you
arrived in bulgaria.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
You were like, yeah, I'm gonna move here yeah, and
not the first day, first twodays like these are weird people
.
They are so cold and warm in inin the same, at the same, in
the same way.
A lot of people, I think, havethis first impression of
bulgarians that are quitedistant and a bit weird.
They're not the best, theydon't have this typical western
(34:53):
service oriented way of doingthings, but they're quite
service oriented in, but intheirs, in their way, in their
authentic way.
Yeah, like the local market inbansko.
The local markets with like thefresh fruit and like people are
super gentle and kind and yeahit's like they're almost sharing
(35:14):
, like the vegetables from theirgarden in the market and they,
they don't talk, but you giveyou a present or one of their
vegetables that they grew intheir own garden, and this, this
, these things are for me they,they represent more than, uh,
just words.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Yeah and also the love for animals.
Like barnsco is full of streetdogs, full of street cats, but
they somehow belong to everyone,like they will feed them as
well, and there is like a senseof community around that as well
.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Yeah, the street animals and the stray dogs and
stray cats, Well yeah, theynourish, they replenish your
soul and, like a therapy, youdon't need to pay a therapist,
you can just uh hang around inthe city square and then you can
just uh hang around in the citysquare and you can just hang
around with the stray dogs andstray cats anybody who's
(36:05):
listening.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
If you're gonna follow sergi on instagram, you
will always see an instagramstory where he found a new cat
friend that just like, snuggledinto his lab and spent the
afternoon there, which isabsolutely so cute yeah, and it
calms, it soothes down yournervous system, and in the west
we're continuously, we are,we're overstressed, we, we are,
(36:27):
we are hurrying just to havesome rest.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah, so this kind of society wasn't for me and
that's why I'm here in bulgaria,which everything is more laid
back, relaxed and my immunesystem can relax here more, and,
which is for me one of the mostimportant things to feel safe
and safety.
When there is safety, you canlive again.
You don't have to go intosurvival mode every day, like I
(36:52):
was in the west.
I was continuously in survivalmode and I rushed back to home
just to have some peace of mindand rest.
Speaker 1 (37:01):
Yeah, so you would say that bulgaria offers you
both a physical safe space andalso a more emotionally safe
space yes, here the that's true.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
The people are, they are, they don't care.
They don't care what you do,how you look like and and
therefore there's less.
Uh, ego is a good thing, butnot the ego which is I don't
know how you call it which islike a blown up ego.
How do you call it Blown up?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
Yeah, yeah, like a big ego, like we're inflated, an
inflated ego.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Yeah, an inflated ego just to, yeah, just to hide
their insecurities, this kind ofego, and you don't have that.
Obviously, you have thateverywhere, but here it's less.
And yeah, just to hide theirinsecurities, this kind of ego,
and here you don't have that.
Obviously, you have thateverywhere, but here is less and
there are less people.
So you have more space and yeah, and I just wish that for
everyone.
This safety, it's veryimportant, because it's not all
(37:55):
about the universe and this, andthat it's about reality as well
.
In Krav Maga as well, youcannot wish when there's an
aggressor, you cannot wish thisperson away when he's attacking
you.
You have to do something.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
You're learning Bulgarian, you're running your
own business.
Now you want to integrate insociety.
You do everything to integratein society, not to be just and
only with the expat community.
I've moved countries many times.
Also loud whisper intuitionsaying may cindy pack your bags
and you go.
I think a lot of people fromthe outside always look at it oh
(38:30):
my god, it's amazing and theyromanticize the idea of moving
country.
But it actually comes with alot of challenges and those
challenges are both andprofessional and just personal,
like finding a new group offriends and stuff.
Can we first talk about youfinding new friends and a circle
of people that you feel like?
Oh, you know what?
I'm becoming closer and closerwith these people and they
(38:53):
they're becoming my local tribehere yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
So the famous uh gabber mate psychotherapist,
gamut gamut day is talking abouttwo very important instincts.
So the first instinct is tobelong in a group, yeah.
And the second importantinstinct is to be authentic in
your own way.
And most of the times insociety, they, they, they clash.
(39:19):
So what a lot of people do.
They give up their ownindividuality, their identity,
their authenticity to belong ina group, but that doesn't make
you happy in the end.
So what a lot of people do,just to belong, they go where.
Yeah, they go where when.
If there's people speakingenglish, they just automatically
(39:39):
go there, which is not a badthing, but they do that most of
the times subconsciously, justto belong.
And I realized this like, okay,but I want to learn bulgarian as
well, I want to integrate, so Iwant to be authentic to myself.
So I said to myself okay, somaybe you're going to be back in
the days.
Was was like a couple of wordsand sentences and that was it.
(40:24):
So I felt I didn't have a likea very in-depth conversation in
the beginning, and that's, youfeel lonely too.
Sometimes you just want to talkin your own native language.
Uh, but I knew I, I I putthrough and I said to myself,
okay, I, I the word.
The rewards of the languagewe're learning, the bulgarian,
will be amazing after a coupleof months, at least a couple, a
(40:48):
half a year.
And I can give you an example I,I, I saw, I, I saw, when I
passed by the, the town hall, Isaw a, a lot of people dancing
in the town hall and I was like,oh, they're doing folk dancing.
I want to do that too, but I'mscared.
I don't know where to go.
I don't understand where I haveto find this kind of
(41:09):
information.
Who should I ask?
Everything is Bulgarian and noexpat or nomad have done these
dances, these classes.
So I went just in the town andI just spoke to anyone and like,
asked them like, hey, where canI learn how to dance?
And they were looking at melike you're a foreigner and it's
(41:30):
you're the first one who wasasking you.
It's weird.
So I felt a bit awkward.
But then in the end I found theteacher and she said to me like
, unfortunately there are nobeginners classes, but they are
intermediate classes and you canjoin and you can see.
I'm like, oh, okay, I thoughtbeginners, okay, I can handle
that, but now intermediate.
So I went to the firstintermediate class and everyone
(41:53):
was looking like what is thisBlanca guy doing here?
He's not Bulgarian, it's veryobvious.
So I felt everyone is lookingat me, I felt uncomfortable and
I thought that's normal.
I have to scan my environment.
It's the first time that I wasthere in this group and will
they accept me?
You know all these basic fearsand I said to myself I just will
(42:17):
shut up, I will just learn thedance, just attend the classes.
And yeah, now I'm like in my15th class and some people say
like now you can lead the classfor a joke because I am like.
They say like hey, you're likeBulgarian, dance like a
Bulgarian.
So I created this safety, thissafe space for myself and I I
(42:41):
think most of the time people,when they move to another
country, they're looking for,for a safe space and then they,
they look good, they go for thefamiliar things, the, the
western culture where I grew upin and you grew up in.
So everything that is yeah, notthat culture is like strange
and scared of the unknown.
(43:03):
Yeah, that's uh, I, Iintuitively know these kind of
things, but sometimes you haveto.
It's too much and you have tobuild in safe spaces like for
yourself.
Maybe there's some advice forpeople want to move and want to
integrate.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Yeah, and for me that's such a beautiful story
because obviously I am a dancer,I have a background as a dancer
and dance allowed me to buildmany friendships around the
world and obviously you notbeing a professional dancer at
all but dance is a way toconnect to another human being
on a soul level and for methat's also a magnificent story
(43:43):
of how powerful just dance isyeah, you don't have to use
words, right yeah, exactly, oh,it's, uh, yeah yeah, it's things
I can recommend if you want to.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
Most of the times, like this typical western way
like, yeah, I should go to aclassroom and and go attend to a
class, and that, and and and.
This way I can, I can integrate, and that's it.
But no, it's about this kind ofthing as well.
Yeah, but you have to gothrough the fear bubble and yeah
, sometimes it's too much, andthen you go to your safe space
(44:16):
and then you can go back, notalways pushing yourself, because
there's like a toxic resiliencymovement going on as well.
Like, yeah, you should push andpush.
Yes, that's true, but sometimesyou have to listen to yourself.
And, yeah, cuddle with cats andgo to take a warm bath instead
of a cold bath, which is finetoo, to do that.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
Thank you so much, ser sergi, for sharing your
story, your thoughts.
If people want to know moreabout your tours in bulgaria or
want to be coached because Iknow that you coach people as
well on how to go and live there, where can they find you on
instagram so my instagram handleis sergey underscore bulgaria
(44:58):
and the website is wwwauthenticslash bulgaria dot com.
I'll definitely share it in theepisode notes as well.
Thank you so much, sergei, forthis beautiful interview.
Speaker 2 (45:12):
Thank you for the space of giving me the space to
talk.
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