March 4, 2024 • 22 mins
Ever felt like you're juggling a million things and the balls just keep getting thrown at you? Well, you're not alone. Welcome to the Melanin Unicorn Podcast, where this week, I, Kerry, become your guide through the storm of life's challenges. We tackle the critical theme of perseverance, peeling back the layers on what it truly means to 'Stay the Course'. Our conversation is a deep dive into the necessity of self-prioritization, the art of refilling your own cup, and the empowerment that comes from learning to say 'no'. It's not selfish to put yourself first; it's essential for powering through towards your aspirations unapologetically.
Wrapping up this empowering session, we pause to extend a heartfelt thank you. Your unwavering support fuels this journey, and as we look ahead, get ready for our next episode's Black Woman moment—a segment dedicated to inspiring and affirming your unique strength and beauty. Keep the love, excellence, and individuality affirmations we shared close to your heart, and let them be the wind beneath your wings until we meet again. Don't forget to connect with us on social media and check the show notes for all the golden nuggets from today's episode. Stay strong, stay focused, and keep shining like the melanin unicorns you are!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kerry (00:00):
Hello and welcome to the Melanin Unicorn Podcast, a
weekly podcast that is dedicatedto the empowerment and
upliftment of black women.
If you are feeling stuck, I amgoing to help you get unstuck,
so you will no longer want tosit on the side of the road, but
instead get up and startrunning towards your dreams and
(00:22):
goals in life.
Plus, we are going to hold eachother accountable.
My name is Kerry and you arelistening to the Melanin Unicorn
Podcast.
Let's start the show.
Welcome back everyone.
(00:47):
We have a new and excitingepisode today and I'm so glad to
be able to really get into thistopic.
And if I'm sounding a littlecongested, it is because I am on
the tail end of a cold.
That's why there was no episodelast week, because I felt like
(01:10):
I was battling for my life.
I don't know what happened.
I am someone who is alwaysmasked up Lysol spray, lysol
wipes, and I still wind upgetting taken down.
So listen, it happens to thebest of us.
(01:31):
So if you hear me pause to takea sip of water, it is because
there's still a little drynessand there's still a little cough
.
But, like I said, I'm on thetail end of this cold, praise
God.
So we are going to start thisepisode, so today's episode is
(01:57):
called Stay the Course.
So stay the course means keepgoing strong till the end,
pursue to the end, To continuedoing something until it is
finished or until you achievesomething you have planned to do
(02:23):
Dictionarycom, okay.
So let's just get right into it.
Staying the course is not easy,and all depending on what the
(02:44):
course is, you'll find yourselfmaybe starting and stopping, or
your start and you just keepgoing until you cross the finish
line.
But because staying the courseisn't always easy, we become
(03:05):
distracted, right.
So at times, our mind wandersor we remember that there's a
thousand and one things we needto do which could actually wait.
That is procrastination, okay.
And if you want to accomplishyour goals, whatever they may be
(03:29):
, we have to learn how to focus,and I understand that it is
very hard in a world that isloud, chaotic and frantic.
Take outside of my window, forexample, because it goes from
place to place in a matter ofseconds.
(03:50):
So how do we learn how to staythe course?
Well, let's get into it.
Here is a quote from GabrielleUnion.
She said if you prioritizeyourself, you are going to save
yourself.
Let me tell you something thatis powerful, especially because
(04:21):
us women, we have a very hardtime prioritizing ourselves.
Some of us are married, some ofus have children, some of us
have demanding careers, some ofus are running our own
businesses.
So it's hard, when you'recompeting against all of that,
(04:45):
to try to prioritize yourselfBecause, in our minds,
prioritizing ourselves meanswe're being selfish and in
actuality it means that you'rebeing self list, that you are
coming first.
So in staying the course, weneed to learn how to put
(05:12):
ourselves first.
So, again, like I said, puttingyourself first does not mean
you are selfish.
It means that you deem you as apriority.
And again, the reason why manyof us don't stay this course is
because, once again, we puteverybody else in front of us
(05:35):
and by the time we come backaround to ourselves, our course
has been derailed.
And it's derailed because we'reexhausted, we are angry,
because we feel like, oh, Ishould have done this, I should
have done that.
We become resentful, we becomebitter and we have to learn we
(06:06):
have to learn how to putourselves first and that it is
detrimental to everything elsearound us if we do not put
ourselves first.
So you have to learn to fillyour own cup.
(06:27):
Right, I have to learn to fillmy own cup, and which?
I am learning that?
Because oftentimes we make themistake of looking for other
people to fill our cup and weare steady, pouring, pouring,
pouring, pouring, pouring forothers.
We are not refilling our owncup.
(06:47):
So if your cup is empty, thenyou have nothing to give to
yourself.
Your course has derailed itself.
Learn to pour back intoyourself.
It is a must.
(07:08):
It is a must.
It is a must Right For yoursanity, for your health, for
your wealth, for your abundance,for your prosperity.
You must learn how to pour intoyourself.
You must learn how to fill yourcup until it overflows, because
(07:28):
let me tell you something, thefull cup is for you, the
overflow is for everyone else.
Okay, you must learn how toblock out all of the unnecessary
noise.
This will help us concentrateand stay on par with ourselves.
(07:49):
Again, the world is a very loudplace, right.
There's loudness everywhere.
There's loudness in our homes,there's loudness on our jobs,
there's loudness.
Even, again, if you're anentrepreneur, there is loudness.
We have to learn to block outall of the unnecessary noise,
(08:15):
because a lot of this noise isunnecessary and when it's
unnecessary, it's chaotic andit's a mess.
So we must learn how to blockout all of the unnecessary noise
.
It's doubly, doubly important.
(08:40):
You must and let me repeat thisyou must learn how to say no.
You must learn how to say no.
Stop saying yes to everything,because everything does not need
a yes to Learn to say no.
(09:01):
You're saying yes to thingsthat you know in your heart is
not going to keep you on thecourse that you are on.
Learn to say no and shut itdown with finality.
And it's okay, because guesswhat?
(09:22):
The person that's on the otherside of you saying no, they're
going to be all right, they willsurvive, okay.
When you don't stay that course, let me tell you something that
resentment and bitterness willcreep in like a thief in the
(09:48):
night, because you have a coursethat you have for yourself,
meaning you have your dreams andyou have your goals that you
have for yourself.
So staying that course helpsyou reach your dreams, helps you
(10:12):
reach your goals.
When you derail, as I saidbefore, and you allow other
things to come in to your circle, should not be there why people
are off doing whatever, livingtheir lives and you are not
(10:33):
living your life, living yourdreams and your goals.
You become resentful becauseyou're looking around and you're
saying, oh, everybody's offdoing their own thing.
And here I am, you knowstruggling.
You know trying to make it.
People are just poo-pooing onwhat I'm trying to do.
(10:56):
So first remove the word fromyour vocabulary struggling,
because when you're struggling,going towards our dreams and
goals, we're doing it.
We're doing it In the name ofJesus.
We are doing it.
But again, no means no.
(11:21):
If someone asks you to dosomething and you clearly see
that it will take you off yourcourse, the answer is no.
No.
I'm sorry, I cannot do thisbecause I am working on my own
(11:41):
stuff.
I'm working on my own things,period.
Staying that course is for youand not for anyone else.
When you stay that course foryou, you hit a hundred.
You hit it straight out of thepark because you know what your
(12:10):
goals look like.
You know what that in-gamelooks like for you.
Your in-game may be, you knowwhat.
I'm starting my own businessand, yes, I may be working a
nine to five.
You use that nine to five tofund your business.
(12:31):
You use that nine to five tofund your companies, because
after a while, once your companytakes off, it's time for you to
take off.
You can't get caught up withthis nine to five that you know
(12:53):
it's time for you to leavebecause your company has taken
off and you need to be 100%focused on building your brand,
on building your empire.
Stay the course and remember ittakes time, right.
(13:14):
If you've always startedsomething and never finished it,
give yourself grace, be kindand gentle with yourself, focus
and begin again Right.
So that's what that means,because many of us have started
(13:39):
something and we didn't finishit Right.
Or we say, oh, I'm going to dothis Right, and it starts off
hot.
You know, you come in hot andthen you fizzle out.
Don't take that as a failure.
(14:00):
Take that as okay.
Maybe that what you were tryingto do isn't what drives you.
Maybe you wanted to dosomething because you see
everyone else doing it andthat's fine.
(14:20):
But if that is not for you,then you're going to just like
drop it and say, oh, you know, Idon't know, I it started off
great, and then I just like lostinterest.
Do yourself a favor and makesure that whatever it is that
(14:47):
you are doing, that is what youshould be doing and not because
everyone else is doing it, andthat's what I mean about.
Just the world is noisy, youknow, because we see these, we
see these people and they andthey get these really great
(15:07):
results X, y and Z and then youwant to get on that bandwagon
too, but then you see that, oh,it's not going the way for me,
like I see is going for everyoneelse.
That's because that is not foryou, and that's okay.
Okay, and so, again, it's aboutgiving yourself grace, being
(15:33):
kind and gentle with yourself,focus and begin again.
Okay, this is a great time toget out your notebook and start
writing down ideas and seeing,and in writing them down, you're
(15:55):
doing a brain dump, right?
You don't have to be specific.
You do not have to be specific.
Just get everything on paperand then start to go through it
and see which one causes yourheart to race, right?
So the, the things that youhave written down and the ones
(16:18):
that you and you're reading overand there are certain things
that are causing your heart torace those things are going to
help you stay your course.
Trust me when I tell you youwill stay your course and you
will be locked in, and then youwill start to expand and grow
(16:41):
these ideas and they will, inturn, turn into your business.
Okay, and remember, this isabout you, right?
It's not about anybody else.
This is about you.
You have your own dreams andgoals that aren't about other
(17:04):
people.
Do not allow anyone to give youfor wanting to pursue your
passions by trying to call youselfish.
Let it roll off your back likewater.
Just let it roll off.
Being selfish for yourselfallows you to grow, because
(17:29):
we're in the season of growth.
Remember, this is it's more in2024.
Okay, do not broadcast what youare doing.
Journal it and do the work tomake things happen for you.
Because let me tell you whatI've learned when you broadcast
(17:52):
and when I say broadcast, Idon't mean you know like, oh,
you know like you're bragging orwhatever.
Or you know you get my gist ofwhat I'm saying.
Because let me tell yousomething you got dream killers
out there.
They will pretend like they arewith you when in reality, they
(18:18):
are against you and they will dowhatever it takes on their part
to sabotage your dreams.
So be very careful.
Move in silence.
That's my motto.
Move in silence and you don'towe anybody an explanation.
(18:40):
You really don't as to whyyou're putting yourself first
and staying the course.
You don't owe nobody anexplanation, but yourself.
Period, point blank, bottomline.
If they have a problem withthat, remember that's their
problem and not yours.
(19:01):
So you stay the course and youkeep your eyes forward and you
keep working on your dreams andyour goals.
Okay, because I believe in you.
I believe in you, queen, and Ilove you, my sisters.
Okay, and as I get ready toclose out this episode, I want
(19:31):
to leave you with this quotefrom Rihanna, aka Bad Gal Riri,
and she said the minute youlearn to love yourself, you
won't want to be anyone else.
So when you are loving onyourself, you will stay in your
(19:57):
course.
You are working on your dreamsand your goals, bringing them
into reality.
You won't want to be anybodyelse but you, queen.
You won't want to be anybodyelse but you.
(20:20):
Okay, you got this, you gotthis, and I believe in you, and
just like I believe in me.
Okay.
So our inspiring quote for todaycomes from Angela Yvonne Davis,
(20:45):
born 1944.
She is an advocate forprisoners' rights.
She is a founding member ofCritical Resistance, a national
organization dedicated toabolishing the prison industrial
complex.
She writes and lectures onsocial injustice, social
(21:08):
movements and the intersectionsof race, gender and class.
And here is what Ms Davis hadto say I am no longer accepting
the things I cannot change.
I am changing the things Icannot accept.
(21:31):
Let me say that again I am nolonger accepting the things I
cannot change.
I am changing the things Icannot accept.
And that is for you, queen.
That is for you.
Thank you so much.
(21:55):
Thank you, thank you so much.
I am so very, very grateful andappreciative for each and every
one of you for downloading thisepisode and listening and show
notes will be available onBuzzsprout.
(22:15):
You can follow the show onInstagram at the Melanin Unicorn
podcast and I will see everyonenext week for our Black Woman
moment.
And remember you are loved, youare excellent, you are
(22:36):
beautiful, you are well, you aresafe and, most importantly, you
are you.
I will talk with you soon.
Be safe wherever you are.
Hello and welcome to the Melanin Unicorn Podcast, a
weekly podcast that is dedicatedto the empowerment and
upliftment of black women.
If you are feeling stuck, I amgoing to help you get unstuck,
so you will no longer want tosit on the side of the road, but
instead get up and startrunning towards your dreams and
(00:22):
goals in life.
Plus, we are going to hold eachother accountable.
My name is Kerry and you arelistening to the Melanin Unicorn
Podcast.
Let's start the show.
Welcome back everyone.
(00:47):
We have a new and excitingepisode today and I'm so glad to
be able to really get into thistopic.
And if I'm sounding a littlecongested, it is because I am on
the tail end of a cold.
That's why there was no episodelast week, because I felt like
(01:10):
I was battling for my life.
I don't know what happened.
I am someone who is alwaysmasked up Lysol spray, lysol
wipes, and I still wind upgetting taken down.
So listen, it happens to thebest of us.
(01:31):
So if you hear me pause to takea sip of water, it is because
there's still a little drynessand there's still a little cough
.
But, like I said, I'm on thetail end of this cold, praise
God.
So we are going to start thisepisode, so today's episode is
(01:57):
called Stay the Course.
So stay the course means keepgoing strong till the end,
pursue to the end, To continuedoing something until it is
finished or until you achievesomething you have planned to do
(02:23):
Dictionarycom, okay.
So let's just get right into it.
Staying the course is not easy,and all depending on what the
(02:44):
course is, you'll find yourselfmaybe starting and stopping, or
your start and you just keepgoing until you cross the finish
line.
But because staying the courseisn't always easy, we become
(03:05):
distracted, right.
So at times, our mind wandersor we remember that there's a
thousand and one things we needto do which could actually wait.
That is procrastination, okay.
And if you want to accomplishyour goals, whatever they may be
(03:29):
, we have to learn how to focus,and I understand that it is
very hard in a world that isloud, chaotic and frantic.
Take outside of my window, forexample, because it goes from
place to place in a matter ofseconds.
(03:50):
So how do we learn how to staythe course?
Well, let's get into it.
Here is a quote from GabrielleUnion.
She said if you prioritizeyourself, you are going to save
yourself.
Let me tell you something thatis powerful, especially because
(04:21):
us women, we have a very hardtime prioritizing ourselves.
Some of us are married, some ofus have children, some of us
have demanding careers, some ofus are running our own
businesses.
So it's hard, when you'recompeting against all of that,
(04:45):
to try to prioritize yourselfBecause, in our minds,
prioritizing ourselves meanswe're being selfish and in
actuality it means that you'rebeing self list, that you are
coming first.
So in staying the course, weneed to learn how to put
(05:12):
ourselves first.
So, again, like I said, puttingyourself first does not mean
you are selfish.
It means that you deem you as apriority.
And again, the reason why manyof us don't stay this course is
because, once again, we puteverybody else in front of us
(05:35):
and by the time we come backaround to ourselves, our course
has been derailed.
And it's derailed because we'reexhausted, we are angry,
because we feel like, oh, Ishould have done this, I should
have done that.
We become resentful, we becomebitter and we have to learn we
(06:06):
have to learn how to putourselves first and that it is
detrimental to everything elsearound us if we do not put
ourselves first.
So you have to learn to fillyour own cup.
(06:27):
Right, I have to learn to fillmy own cup, and which?
I am learning that?
Because oftentimes we make themistake of looking for other
people to fill our cup and weare steady, pouring, pouring,
pouring, pouring, pouring forothers.
We are not refilling our owncup.
(06:47):
So if your cup is empty, thenyou have nothing to give to
yourself.
Your course has derailed itself.
Learn to pour back intoyourself.
It is a must.
(07:08):
It is a must.
It is a must Right For yoursanity, for your health, for
your wealth, for your abundance,for your prosperity.
You must learn how to pour intoyourself.
You must learn how to fill yourcup until it overflows, because
(07:28):
let me tell you something, thefull cup is for you, the
overflow is for everyone else.
Okay, you must learn how toblock out all of the unnecessary
noise.
This will help us concentrateand stay on par with ourselves.
(07:49):
Again, the world is a very loudplace, right.
There's loudness everywhere.
There's loudness in our homes,there's loudness on our jobs,
there's loudness.
Even, again, if you're anentrepreneur, there is loudness.
We have to learn to block outall of the unnecessary noise,
(08:15):
because a lot of this noise isunnecessary and when it's
unnecessary, it's chaotic andit's a mess.
So we must learn how to blockout all of the unnecessary noise
.
It's doubly, doubly important.
(08:40):
You must and let me repeat thisyou must learn how to say no.
You must learn how to say no.
Stop saying yes to everything,because everything does not need
a yes to Learn to say no.
(09:01):
You're saying yes to thingsthat you know in your heart is
not going to keep you on thecourse that you are on.
Learn to say no and shut itdown with finality.
And it's okay, because guesswhat?
(09:22):
The person that's on the otherside of you saying no, they're
going to be all right, they willsurvive, okay.
When you don't stay that course, let me tell you something that
resentment and bitterness willcreep in like a thief in the
(09:48):
night, because you have a coursethat you have for yourself,
meaning you have your dreams andyou have your goals that you
have for yourself.
So staying that course helpsyou reach your dreams, helps you
(10:12):
reach your goals.
When you derail, as I saidbefore, and you allow other
things to come in to your circle, should not be there why people
are off doing whatever, livingtheir lives and you are not
(10:33):
living your life, living yourdreams and your goals.
You become resentful becauseyou're looking around and you're
saying, oh, everybody's offdoing their own thing.
And here I am, you knowstruggling.
You know trying to make it.
People are just poo-pooing onwhat I'm trying to do.
(10:56):
So first remove the word fromyour vocabulary struggling,
because when you're struggling,going towards our dreams and
goals, we're doing it.
We're doing it In the name ofJesus.
We are doing it.
But again, no means no.
(11:21):
If someone asks you to dosomething and you clearly see
that it will take you off yourcourse, the answer is no.
No.
I'm sorry, I cannot do thisbecause I am working on my own
(11:41):
stuff.
I'm working on my own things,period.
Staying that course is for youand not for anyone else.
When you stay that course foryou, you hit a hundred.
You hit it straight out of thepark because you know what your
(12:10):
goals look like.
You know what that in-gamelooks like for you.
Your in-game may be, you knowwhat.
I'm starting my own businessand, yes, I may be working a
nine to five.
You use that nine to five tofund your business.
(12:31):
You use that nine to five tofund your companies, because
after a while, once your companytakes off, it's time for you to
take off.
You can't get caught up withthis nine to five that you know
(12:53):
it's time for you to leavebecause your company has taken
off and you need to be 100%focused on building your brand,
on building your empire.
Stay the course and remember ittakes time, right.
(13:14):
If you've always startedsomething and never finished it,
give yourself grace, be kindand gentle with yourself, focus
and begin again Right.
So that's what that means,because many of us have started
(13:39):
something and we didn't finishit Right.
Or we say, oh, I'm going to dothis Right, and it starts off
hot.
You know, you come in hot andthen you fizzle out.
Don't take that as a failure.
(14:00):
Take that as okay.
Maybe that what you were tryingto do isn't what drives you.
Maybe you wanted to dosomething because you see
everyone else doing it andthat's fine.
(14:20):
But if that is not for you,then you're going to just like
drop it and say, oh, you know, Idon't know, I it started off
great, and then I just like lostinterest.
Do yourself a favor and makesure that whatever it is that
(14:47):
you are doing, that is what youshould be doing and not because
everyone else is doing it, andthat's what I mean about.
Just the world is noisy, youknow, because we see these, we
see these people and they andthey get these really great
(15:07):
results X, y and Z and then youwant to get on that bandwagon
too, but then you see that, oh,it's not going the way for me,
like I see is going for everyoneelse.
That's because that is not foryou, and that's okay.
Okay, and so, again, it's aboutgiving yourself grace, being
(15:33):
kind and gentle with yourself,focus and begin again.
Okay, this is a great time toget out your notebook and start
writing down ideas and seeing,and in writing them down, you're
(15:55):
doing a brain dump, right?
You don't have to be specific.
You do not have to be specific.
Just get everything on paperand then start to go through it
and see which one causes yourheart to race, right?
So the, the things that youhave written down and the ones
(16:18):
that you and you're reading overand there are certain things
that are causing your heart torace those things are going to
help you stay your course.
Trust me when I tell you youwill stay your course and you
will be locked in, and then youwill start to expand and grow
(16:41):
these ideas and they will, inturn, turn into your business.
Okay, and remember, this isabout you, right?
It's not about anybody else.
This is about you.
You have your own dreams andgoals that aren't about other
(17:04):
people.
Do not allow anyone to give youfor wanting to pursue your
passions by trying to call youselfish.
Let it roll off your back likewater.
Just let it roll off.
Being selfish for yourselfallows you to grow, because
(17:29):
we're in the season of growth.
Remember, this is it's more in2024.
Okay, do not broadcast what youare doing.
Journal it and do the work tomake things happen for you.
Because let me tell you whatI've learned when you broadcast
(17:52):
and when I say broadcast, Idon't mean you know like, oh,
you know like you're bragging orwhatever.
Or you know you get my gist ofwhat I'm saying.
Because let me tell yousomething you got dream killers
out there.
They will pretend like they arewith you when in reality, they
(18:18):
are against you and they will dowhatever it takes on their part
to sabotage your dreams.
So be very careful.
Move in silence.
That's my motto.
Move in silence and you don'towe anybody an explanation.
(18:40):
You really don't as to whyyou're putting yourself first
and staying the course.
You don't owe nobody anexplanation, but yourself.
Period, point blank, bottomline.
If they have a problem withthat, remember that's their
problem and not yours.
(19:01):
So you stay the course and youkeep your eyes forward and you
keep working on your dreams andyour goals.
Okay, because I believe in you.
I believe in you, queen, and Ilove you, my sisters.
Okay, and as I get ready toclose out this episode, I want
(19:31):
to leave you with this quotefrom Rihanna, aka Bad Gal Riri,
and she said the minute youlearn to love yourself, you
won't want to be anyone else.
So when you are loving onyourself, you will stay in your
(19:57):
course.
You are working on your dreamsand your goals, bringing them
into reality.
You won't want to be anybodyelse but you, queen.
You won't want to be anybodyelse but you.
(20:20):
Okay, you got this, you gotthis, and I believe in you, and
just like I believe in me.
Okay.
So our inspiring quote for todaycomes from Angela Yvonne Davis,
(20:45):
born 1944.
She is an advocate forprisoners' rights.
She is a founding member ofCritical Resistance, a national
organization dedicated toabolishing the prison industrial
complex.
She writes and lectures onsocial injustice, social
(21:08):
movements and the intersectionsof race, gender and class.
And here is what Ms Davis hadto say I am no longer accepting
the things I cannot change.
I am changing the things Icannot accept.
(21:31):
Let me say that again I am nolonger accepting the things I
cannot change.
I am changing the things Icannot accept.
And that is for you, queen.
That is for you.
Thank you so much.
(21:55):
Thank you, thank you so much.
I am so very, very grateful andappreciative for each and every
one of you for downloading thisepisode and listening and show
notes will be available onBuzzsprout.
(22:15):
You can follow the show onInstagram at the Melanin Unicorn
podcast and I will see everyonenext week for our Black Woman
moment.
And remember you are loved, youare excellent, you are
(22:36):
beautiful, you are well, you aresafe and, most importantly, you
are you.
I will talk with you soon.
Be safe wherever you are.
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy And Charlamagne Tha God!
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.