How do you set a narcissist off and make them expose themselves to other people?
Check out my courses "Understanding the 7 Stages of a Narcissistic Relationship" and "Finding Your W.H.Y!" at https://mentalhealness.net
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I'm Lee & I've been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder ( NPD ). I've been in therapy since 2017 & It has definitely changed my life because without it, I would have lost everything. My platform is dedicated to giving you the WHYs behind the things that Narcissists do. I'm not here to diagnose ANYONE or to tell you to leave your relationship. I'm just trying to give you the information to make your own informed decisions
1 on 1's and all my links - https://beacons.page/mentalhealness
Remember, It's not your fault - https://a.co/d/2WNtdKJ
Episode Transcript
Have you ever just wanted to seta narcissist off?
Like in all the times of you dealing with a toxic
narcissistic person, has it everjust crossed your mind?
Like how do I piss this person off?
How do I get under their skin? How do I take my power back and
stop reacting? That's what we talked about
(00:21):
today, y'all. Of course, if you're new here,
I'm Lee Hammock. I'm a diagnosed narcissist here
to give you the inside look at the mind of narcissists and
other toxic people, and we're gonna hop right into it.
Y'all Seriously, how do you set a narcissist out?
So let me let me stop you right there.
Hold your little empathetic britches.
Hold your empathetic horses. Hold them.
Hold up, use discretion because as you some of you might know,
(00:46):
some narcissists will snap, someof them will absolutely get
violent, some of them will lose their damn minds and threaten
you and actually bring harm to you.
So just get that out the way first.
Is it out the way? Got it good.
OK, perfect. So the number one way to set a
narcissist ass off is to simply agree with them.
(01:10):
Oh, you thought you thought it was going to be something like
you thought it was going to be some type of master plan digging
deep beneath the surface? No.
Narcissist, including myself, are fragile.
We are fragile people. We are fragile human beings.
It does not take much at all to set us off it.
Yeah, literally. It just does not right If I'm
(01:32):
insulting you, if I'm trying to hurt your feelings, if I'm
trying to bring pain and it hurtand disarm you and just bring,
just just do all this type of stuff to you.
I want the reaction from you. I want you to hurt.
I want you to cry. I want you to beg me to stop.
I want you to be like, please stop talking about me like that.
(01:54):
I told you not to say that aboutme.
I told you to not do that again.I want that.
If I'm trying to set you off, I want that from you.
So if you're not giving that to me, what happens?
I you set me off, you get under my skin.
If I'm calling you fat or too skinny and you just say, Yep,
(02:18):
I'm as fat as I can be. Yep, I'm skinny as hell.
You too stupid. Yep, I'm a I'm dumb as a sack of
bricks. You're slow as hell.
Well, I can't. I wish I would.
Just wish I could be slower. You're just uneducated.
Yep, I'm just dumb as hell. No education.
No, nothing. No, nothing.
(02:39):
I can't even talk straight. Yeah, that will send them off.
It will, of course, like I stated previously, you need to
use discretion when you're trying to use any of these
tactics because like I stated previously, they can snap and
lose their damn minds. Like not all narcissists are out
(03:00):
here like just cool, calm and collected.
You might be dealing with a covert narcissist that never
screams, but some people are notdealing with that.
Some people are dealing with thescreamers, the yellers, the
beaters, the heaters, the hitters, right?
Some of y'all are dealing with them, so if if you're dealing
with them, use discretion. I know sometimes you like you
want to get it under their skins.
This is the quickest, most efficient way.
(03:21):
Y'all seriously, It just is likeSir, if they're trying to get
under your skin that I know somebody just thought I I just
had it. I just had this thought, so I
know some of y'all might be thinking it.
Woolly isn't just agree with them and just being bland and
plain. Isn't that just Gray rocking?
It's a form of it, Absolutely. It's a form of Gray rocking
(03:43):
because you know, if you don't know what Gray rocking is, Gray
rocking is when you become boring to that narcissistic
person. You remove all emotional
reactions to this person. You stop giving them emotional
energy. You're giving them
straightforward, bland responses.
Yes, you're right. Uh huh.
You got it. Yeppers, that's correct.
(04:06):
Couldn't be writer, right? You're removing the emotional
energy that you normally would be attributing to this person.
You're taking it back. You're removing it so it's not
getting. So it's giving you power and
taking the power away from them.You see what I'm saying?
So that's a piece of what goes on here.
So we're dealing with this toxic, manipulative, horrible
ass person. This is who you're going to be
(04:26):
dealing with. This is the type of stuff that
you have to master, the type of person that you have to master
when you're dealing with them, right?
So that's how you get into the mindset right here.
That's how you dig deeper into their minds.
Like you have to master their mindsets in any circumstance.
Yeah, my mind went blank right there.
I'm so sorry. But as you continue to have to
deal with this person, you have to learn them because they're
(04:49):
trying to bring pain to you. They hate grey rocket.
They absolutely do. So if you master grey rocket
becoming boring to them, sometimes they'll leave you
alone, other times they won't. So if you're saying, Yep, I'm
stupid, I'm dumb, I'm just ridiculous, I'm fat, I'm lazy,
(05:11):
I'm dumb, I'm bald headed, my teeth are messed up.
I nobody's going to you, right? Nobody is ever going to want me.
You're just so absolutely correct.
No one on this planet is going to want me.
You're right, that's Gray rocking, but that's giving them
some energy, right? That's not giving them the
energy that they want. That's giving them a form of
energy though, right? Am I right?
(05:31):
You're giving them something, but it ain't it's not full form
of Gray rocking. Gray rocking is you're boring,
right? Narcissists love energy and they
love taking energy from you. Yeah, I hate my officers.
Are everybody police officers? It's safe.
It's safe. Provides their safety.
Right. But it's also like every few
minutes, you mean? But great.
(05:52):
Like I said, it could be it's a form of Gray rocking, but it's
just a little bit more antagonistic because you know,
you're trying to antagonize themwhen you just blend, when you
just regularly agreeing with them, you're they're going to
take it as antagonistic. They're going to take you as an
enemy combatant and some of themwill snap on your ass.
I promise you. Some of them will snap on you
because they feel like you beingantagonistic.
They feel like you just why you?Why you talking like that?
(06:15):
Uh huh. You are dumb.
Yeah, I'm dumb. This this is how we go.
Y'all, You are you dumb as hell.You're right.
I am dumb, you know. Yeah, Yeah, you, you is dumb.
Thank you for agreeing with me. No problem.
I'll agree with you all the time.
You see, dumb people would agreewith me.
You call me dumb. I agree with you.
I'm dumb. You see, dumb, dumb people don't
even know that they're dumb a lot of times.
(06:36):
Well, I I don't know. I'm done either sometimes,
right? I'm just so stupid.
I'm just so dumb. You're right.
Why the hell you talking like that?
Talking like what? I'm just agreeing with you.
Why you agreeing with me? So you you just going to admit
that? You dumb?
What the heck? I always see what's going on
here. See, this is dumb.
This is ridiculous. I'm about to get mad at itself.
I'm going to lose my mind on you.
I'm about to snap on you now they're going to snap on you
(06:57):
because you're not giving them energy.
You're not giving them that emotional energy.
What sense does that make? Y'all?
You have to look at it from the through that lens right there.
What sense does it make when you're dealing with somebody who
thinks like this, who act like this, who talks like this?
What sense does it make? You got to do it like seriously.
(07:19):
They will become antagonistic towards you or get angry or
upset upset with you at you because you're not getting upset
and antagonistic towards them like they want you to.
They will argue with you becausethey they will argue with you or
get angrier because you're refusing to argue with them
(07:39):
because you're refusing to push back on them.
And yes, again, I know how ridiculously stupid this sounds,
but you have to understand, thisis how the mind of a lot of
narcissists work. We want energy.
We, we want to know that we matter.
We want to know that we have some type of control over you.
And the easiest, most efficient way to prove that we have some
(07:59):
type of control over you is to get you to snap on us, is to get
you to react. If we can make you cry because
we're bored, if we can make you scream at us because we're
bored, if we can find some way to victimize ourselves through
you because you we're bored, guess what?
We're going to continue to do that.
That means we have power. That means we have control.
But now you're just agreeing with me.
(08:20):
Now you're just telling me what I want you.
Now you're just, you're taking the power away from my insults.
How dare you again. How dare you take away the power
from my insults? How dare you strip my power away
from me in these circumstances. That's how it goes, y'all.
I'm serious. I'm serious.
Is this 2 rat bow? It's another rat.
(08:42):
Yeah, I'm going to. That's another rat.
How stupid. It really is dumb, y'all?
It really is dumb of narcissistic people.
Yes, my mind works that same way.
I'm still, I still think very narcissistic, y'all.
I just don't behave that way because I understand that
because I've been in therapy foreight years and I've been able
to kind of curtail my emotions to get the results that I want
(09:06):
out of life. The positive results and not
always the negativity, not the negativity that I've been
involved in and whatnot. The positive results that I
enjoy, that I like that I, I feel, you know, I love that I
need that. I need the positive results.
So I've worked on myself. Most narcissists are not going
to do that. They love just being childish.
Yes, it's it's a childish ass mentality to try to set somebody
(09:29):
off, to try to antagonize somebody to get them to snap, to
try to make somebody cry on purpose, to just belittle
someone because you feel you feel at you've want to feel
superior to them. It's a very childish mindset.
And yes, no, narcissists never grow up unless they go get
unless they go get some help. I want narcissists go get help
y'all. Let's be real.
I, I, I, I know the vibe that I give off sometimes makes it seem
(09:52):
like I hate narcissists, but I don't hate narcissists.
Yeah, I'm a narcissist. I have a narcissistic
personality disorder. It doesn't go away.
I will always be a narcissist, just like an alcoholic will
always be an alcoholic for what they say.
Like I'm talking to a recoveringaddict.
They'll say I'm still an addict,I'm just for recovery even
though they they've been sober for 10 years, right?
That's how some people consider I could be wrong.
If y'all, if I'm wrong, just feel free to correct me
(10:14):
respectfully. But yeah, I, I just don't hate
narcissists. I want narcissists to get
better. I want narcissists to see this
video, realize the harm and damage that they've done to
people and correct the shit, notcontinue to perpetuate and play
the victim. We'll leave.
What about what they did to me? What about what about how I
feel? What about my hair?
What about my heart? What about all this stuff going
(10:34):
on? Why can't they just take
accountability? Why I always got to be me?
Well, I got to do you what I'm saying.
Get good at agreeing with you. I'm stripped and if you get good
at this tactic right here again,y'all, it would diffuse.
It would it could diffuse them. It could make them leave you
alone. But you know the other side of
things, it could make them snap and lose their damn minds,
(10:56):
right? It could make them snap beyond
belief, lose they rabbit ass minds and just keep acting
foolish towards you, keep being abusive towards you, keep being
manipulative, manipulative towards you because at that
core, this is who they are. You know, at their core, this is
exactly who they are. This is who they're going to be
and you can try to get in between that or get in the way,
but that doesn't help in a long run.
(11:17):
It doesn't help anybody out. Like they're going to continue
to be childish or just not grow up emotionally until they want
to, until they make the choice to be able to do that.
Y'all. So this is me wishing all
narcissists the ability to grow up.
If you don't want to grow up, hey, your partner's probably
going to leave your kids and I don't talk to you.
You have a very lonely victim blaming existence where at the
(11:37):
end of the at the end of your life, you like everybody hates
me and they because it's on them.
Sure pal, rest in peace anyway, anyway, y'all they they got to
make to the end of my video. The mental illness podcast is
recording right now. Y'all, I have about 4 episodes
recorded right now. I have three more interviews
this week, so it's going to be 7.
I'm going to be dropping them here on this channel of this
(11:58):
channel. The mental illness channel is
it's going to be still I'm stillbe talking about narcissist
y'all that I'm incorporating survivor stories.
I'm incorporating mental health therapist stories about how they
got to become therapists. I mean, if you're battling a
mental health issue or your mental illness or whatever the
case may be, if you have a survivor story that you want to
tell about growing up in toxic household, anything mental
health related or mental thriving related, like make sure
(12:21):
to check out the link in my description that apply to be on
the podcast virtually or in person.
You'll be sitting in person talking to me like so how, how
what brings you here to North Carolina?
ANYWAYS, y'all, I appreciate every single one of y'all.
Hit that subscribe button and I'm out please.
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