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Narcissists Don't want you to go to therapy. Matter of fact, they hate it. They want you to remain delusional and ignorant to their behaviors so that they can take advantage of you. In this video you get the POV of a diagnosed narcissist and a look inside how narcissists minds work.
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I'm Lee & I've been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder ( NPD ). I've been in therapy since 2017 & It has definitely changed my life because without it, I would have lost everything. My platform is dedicated to giving you the WHYs behind the things that Narcissists do. I'm not here to diagnose ANYONE or to tell you to leave your relationship. I'm just trying to give you the information to make your own informed decisions
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Episode Transcript
Why don't narcissist want you togo to therapy?
I know a lot of times you see people making videos about why
narcissist don't go to therapy, but today we flipping it on his
head. We're flipping it upside down
and answering the question, why don't they want you as a
survivor or thriver to go to therapy?
(00:22):
Of course, if you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock.
I'm a diagnosed narcissist, and welcome to another episode of
The Narcissist Code, y'all. Let's get into it.
Straight into it, y'all. The Narcissist Code is also
going to become the Mental Illness Podcast, or I've just
started recording for the actualpodcast, so that's coming soon,
y'all. But let's hop right into it.
(00:43):
Narcissistic people hate therapyunless they can benefit from it,
right? But most times they don't
benefit from it unless the therapist is on their side.
In this scenario, do we talk about today, right.
This scenario we talk about today, they don't benefit from
it. So they don't want you to go.
And one of the main reasons thatthey don't want you to go to
(01:04):
therapy is because they want to keep lying.
They want to keep you in their world of delusion.
They want to keep you right where you are.
Right narcissistic people do notlike it when other people are
(01:25):
telling you what is going on. They want to keep you in their
delusional world because they benefit directly from your
delusions. They do.
They absolutely do. They benefit from your delusion.
They benefit from you not understanding what exactly is
going on. They absolutely benefit from it
(01:46):
like they benefit from you living in their reality.
They do. I feel like so many people have
to understand it right there. Narcissistic people directly
benefit from you not going to therapy and from you continuing
to live in the world of their delusions continue for you to
continue to live in their crazy,just twisted ass world.
(02:10):
They benefit directly from it. Why would yeah, think about this
right here. Why would they want you to go
get help for somebody a qualified therapist to just say
hey look, you're in a toxic relationship.
They've been lying to you that them them cheating on you is not
your fault. You haven't done anything wrong
to this person to make them beatyour ass or for them to threaten
(02:32):
to take your life or whatever the case may be.
They're lying to you. They don't want somebody that's
more qualified than they are or smarter than they are to give
you better advice. And that y'all, the fact that
they don't want do to get a, a, an alternative perspective lets
you know. It should let you know that they
(02:53):
know what they're doing. It should let you know that they
know what they're doing is not good.
They know that it's abusive. They know that it's
manipulative. They absolutely do.
So I feel like that's one thing you have to start to understand
is they really, really, truly doknow what they're doing.
That's why they want to hide it.That's why they don't want you
(03:14):
to go to therapy. They want you to sit in their
delusional world and just be twisted all up.
What is going on, Charisse? Hope you're having a good day.
That's what they want. They want you to be twisted all
up and zooted and all of that other good stuff, y'all?
Absolutely. The next reason that they don't
want you to go to therapy is because they don't want to be
(03:35):
exposed and feel that shame. They really don't.
They don't want to go to therapyor marriage counseling for the
therapist or the counselor or the coach or whoever it is to
just expose them for their toxicity.
They don't want to feel the shame of exposure.
(03:57):
They want to keep that mask on. They want to be able to do
whatever they want to do. They want to keep the toxicity
going. They want to keep the illusions
up. They don't want anybody else to
know what they've been doing. So if you go to therapy and a
therapist exposes them, they don't benefit from it.
(04:17):
They, it, they don't help them. It absolutely does not help them
and what not. And I saw somebody said Sarah
says my therapist actually love my narcissistic ex.
It was more of a me thing I suppose.
Other than that she was great. She just didn't understand
narcissism which is absolutely important.
See this type of therapy that Sarah just described would
benefit a narcissist most times.Right?
(04:39):
Because if you don't and this isnot me trying to down therapy,
I'm a therapy advocate. Go take your ass to therapy.
If that person is not is not well versed in manipulative
behaviors or narcissistic people, it could set you up for
failure. Let's just keep it hot and ready
like a Little Caesar's pizza, right?
It could absolutely set you up for failure if your person just
(05:04):
does not understand toxic manipulative behavior.
It just doesn't help you out right there.
And OGNC says do fat, do, do therapy alone, separate.
Yeah, I, I truly believe that right there.
I truly believe that you should,if you, if you going to go to
therapy in a toxic relationship when you're dealing with a
narcissistic person, it's betterthat you go by yourself most
times, right? The only benefit that I could
(05:26):
see in the going to couples counseling with a narcissist is
for them to for them to just show you exactly who they are in
front of somebody else. It's for them to just validate
you by being manipulative, by being dismissive, by cussing out
the therapist that just validates you more and that.
But that's a rarity. That happens right there, y'all?
That's a rarity. Do not go to the marriage.
(05:48):
I'm the Yeah, hold on. I got to do this right here.
Do not go to marriage counselingwith a narcissist based on what
I just said. Well, Lee told me to go to
therapy because go to counselingbecause they would help me.
No, that's not what I said. I didn't say that, I said that
some narcissist you can benefit from marriage conscious
sometimes because they expose themselves by being abusive and
(06:12):
manipulative to the therapist. That's what I said.
I didn't say the other stuff. No.
Another reason why they don't want to want you to go to
therapy. But this is probably the main
reason why narcissists don't want to go to therapy right
here. Y'all is because they don't want
(06:34):
you to leave. They do not want you to leave.
We'll leave. How?
If I go to therapy, why did they?
Why would they think that I would leave them just by going
to therapy? Because they know that they're
doing wrong. They know what they've put you
through. They know that they've hurt you
(06:56):
or harmed you or just bring sometype of toxicity into your life.
They know that they've been horrible.
They don't want the therapist tojust say you should leave.
You need to leave them. They already have it in their
head that they know that if you told somebody else what they are
doing to you or what they have done to you that you will
probably leave. So that's why they don't want
(07:16):
you to go to therapy because they assume, assume ASS oom that
you're going to leave based on what they've done.
Oh, Bailey, I don't think you need to go talk to that
therapist because then you goingto come home and you going to
leave me. You don't want to leave.
You go to therapy and then you come home and you don't want to
(07:37):
leave me. Why would babe look, I'm I don't
want to leave you, but like, whywould you worry about that?
Why would you worry about the therapist telling me to to leave
you? If you haven't done anything
wrong, if you ain't done nothingwrong, you got nothing to worry
about, right, Right. You see what I'm saying?
(07:57):
That's, that's how it should look, right?
That's how it should go right there.
They know that they're doing youwrong.
They know that they're putting you through BS.
They know that they are hurting you or harming you.
You know, that's what they do. They, they do absolutely know.
(08:22):
And so they, they know. So they assume that the
therapist or your friends or whoever it is will tell you to
leave them. Absolutely.
The guilt is thick with eight KS.
Lisa 8 KS thick. It's so thick you got to it's
(08:43):
hard to even say it thick. But that's what goes right
there. Y'all.
That literally is it is you, Jerry.
It is absolutely shameful toxic behavior.
This is what goes on right here.This is what ends up happening.
And Angela says some therapists can be narcissists and defend
their narcissistic patients. Absolutely true.
(09:05):
In this situation right here, that would benefit the
narcissist though. That would benefit the
narcissist to go in there and put on an act.
The cross stay little toxic ass narcissistic legs and just
pretend to be pretend to be the non to to pretend to be the
victim and understanding they'llbe looking at the third like
this. I'm like you're right.
(09:25):
Yeah, I understand that Yeah, the the emotions need to we need
to we need to be here. We're here, but we need to be
here. I get you.
You over there pissed off you like what the hell?
You understand them and then youlook crazy.
You see what I'm saying? So that absolutely does happen
right here. Advice.
My wife, who has now reverse discarded me by telling me God
(09:47):
wants her separate from me for six months to have us grow.
Meanwhile, she has manipulated me the whole time I ghosted her
and now she's waiting for the six months to be over to seem
like the victims. Oh, hell no.
See, in this situation right here, you got to, you got to cut
that. You got to cut that loose right
there. Because six months like such a
specific time God told me I needed, we needed six months
apart. I need I, I, I need y'all
(10:13):
sidebar, sidebar. I hate, I hate when people just
say God told them to do some shit.
I'm sorry that just I don't it'sthat type of stuff be pissing me
off. Like prove to me that God said
you can't. I can't prove it to you.
God said it though. Then you just making shit up.
(10:36):
God ain't told you to do this. God, you just want it.
Just be real. Don't put that shit on God.
Just say you want this. You just won't.
You want to be together. You don't want to be together.
They say you want to go out hereand do something else.
You want you want to be single. Don't you just say put God into
this. God.
Look, God looking down God like I ain't say that shit.
(10:58):
Archangel Gabrielle, bring me mybring me my cell phone.
This woman down here tell me I take.
I told her to this woman down here telling her husband that I
told her she needs six months separation.
Bring me my phone. God going through the God going
through his messages. I ain't text that What the hell
I ain't that. I ain't even text nothing but no
(11:18):
her leave she be lying. She lying on my name.
That's what God said. That's what God looking like
God. God looking down like that God.
God ain't say that, the guy said.
(11:42):
God said love does not boast. Oh my goodness, I'm telling
y'all. My husband has been cheating on
me for years and I called him out.
He spit on me, pushed me, told me to unlock myself and won't
talk to me now because he needs space.
Ash, you need some space from that relationship or you're
going to end up losing your life.
Because if you confront him about cheating and he spit on
(12:02):
you, hell no, I'm going to tell you.
I'm going to tell you my prediction what happens here.
You give him another, you give him another chance.
You go back to him because you're trauma bonded or whatever
the case may be. He is just bidding his time and
then eventually he leaves you for somebody else and then you
you're left picking up the pieces.
You're left picking up the pieces and having so much.
(12:23):
You're so right about God is looking down God, God like God,
stop lying on me. God told me God, I I ain't say
that I've been giving him chances for 18 years.
So now you give him enough chances, you how many more
chances you got in you 18 years that look, you don't raise your
your the, the years right there.You're 18 years.
(12:44):
The chances, the chances you've given him can vote right now in
America, the chances that you'vegiven him can vote in the in the
2026 primary, right? That's too old.
That's too many chances. That's too much time right
there, you know, you see what I'm saying?
That love don't do that. That's not love no more.
That's trauma. That's that's not love.
That's trauma. You see what it feels, It looks,
(13:05):
look, it looks like love. It smells like love, but that's
trauma. That's love adjacent.
That's like, it's not, that's not sugar, that's sucrose,
that's split, that's splendor. That's splendor.
It looks like sugar, tastes likesugar, but it's not sugar.
It's splendor. That's splendor love.
That's not real love. You know what I'm saying?
But now you have to make a plan.You have to make a plan right
(13:26):
here in this situation. Yeah.
But yeah, I do got to hop off this thing.
I have to do like this little haunted house or whatever with
my kids. I do my, my coaching, my
courses. Everything is at
mentalillness.net. My, my coaching, my courses.
If you like I said, mental illness.net for my one on ones
and whatnot, But I also not justalso enter the code mothers and
(13:48):
fathers, mothers or fathers for 50% off my courses.
So mental illness.net for all things Lee Hammock, y'all, I got
to hop off here. I got to drive through the
little haunted house or whateverin in North Carolina.
I think it's in Oxford or somewhere.
So I got to hit this road. Y'all, I just had to go live for
a few minutes. Appreciate y'all being here.
Hit the subscribe button if you haven't already.
(14:09):
And as always, y'all, as always,as always, mental illness is out
where my stuff go. This is crazy.
I used to have a an exit. I used to have an exit thing.
Mental is out. Peace.
Thank you so much for making it to the end of my video.
I am extremely grateful for you.Have no idea.
If you haven't already, make sure you go ahead and subscribe
(14:30):
to the channel, help us reach more people and click on the
screen to watch another video orto browse through another
playlist. There's also a link on the
screen to check out my courses and my support groups to help
you heal and understand what you've been through.
Thank you so much again. I will see you in the next
video. Peace.
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