The Messy Parts

In this re-release of one of our favorite episodes, Gary Vaynerchuk opens up to Maryam about fear, self-esteem, forgiveness, AI, leadership, and what he believes is a growing crisis of “late adulthood.” Gary shares why so many professionals feel stuck — not because of burnout, but because of insecurity and unresolved resentment. He breaks down his philosophy on kind candor vs. radical candor, why fear is the real ...

What happens when you walk away from the career everyone expected you to have? Chef Ayesha Nurdjaja was on a path toward law school, working at a prestigious law firm and doing everything “right.” But something was missing. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Ayesha shares with Maryam how she left a promising legal career to pursue cooking, even when her parents stopped speaking to her and everyone around her thought sh...

"No just means not right now." That's the philosophy that kept writer and Oldster founder Sari Botton going through decades of rejection before building one of Substack's most beloved magazines — at age 60. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Sari gets honest with Maryam about the messy middle: the identity searching, the failed attempts, the mean girls that never quite went away, and the moment she finally stopped contorting...

Bonnie Hammer ran 10 networks and two studios at NBCUniversal — but her career didn't start in a corner office. It started cleaning up dog poop on a kids' TV set. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Bonnie gets radically honest with Maryam about the moments that actually shaped her career: being passed over for the top job at NBC, negotiating her way into her own studio, saying yes to WWE when every instinct said no, and buil...

What does it take to build one of New York City's most recognizable social media brands — from scratch, in secret, while working a day job? Subway Creatures founder Rick McGuire tells Maryam the whole story: from working at VH1 and MTV while quietly building Subway Creatures on the side to Pizza Rat, Ed Sheeran, and a very public account hack that brought him to tears and nearly took everything. Rick gets honest about the cha...

Kerry Docherty is a co-founder of Faherty, the surf lifestyle brand she built alongside her husband, his identical twin brother, and her mother-in-law. But behind the sun-soaked brand was a woman quietly carrying the weight of secrets — from childhood, from marriage, and from a business that nearly broke her. In this episode, Kerry opens up to Maryam about growing up in an Irish Catholic household where hard things went unspo...

What if the hardest parts of your life were actually setting you up for something bigger? Assia Grazioli-Venier’s story is a powerful reminder that your worst moments don’t define you — what you do next does. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Assia shares with Maryam her journey through dyslexia, cancer, infertility, and major career pivots — and how she turned every setback into fuel. She opens up about b...

Belle Burden was raised in a family where you simply did not talk about the messy parts. So when her husband left without explanation during COVID lockdown — and then asked her to tell people it was amicable — something in her snapped. In this episode, the New York Times bestselling author of “Strangers” tells Maryam about the moment she chose radical honesty over a managed narrative, and why that single dec...

What does it take to walk away from a six-figure career with no plan, go broke, and come out the other side with a Bravo show, an Amazon Prime series, and a Broadway stage credit? In this episode of The Messy Parts, the one and only Bevy Smith tells Maryam about growing up in Central Harlem, cutting her teeth in luxury fashion advertising, landing at Vibe and Rolling Stone, and then walking away from all of it to start over —...

Joanna Coles built one of the most storied careers in media — from editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan to running The Daily Beast. So when she says feminism got it wrong, people listen. In this episode, Joanna challenges assumptions about ambition, motherhood, and what a successful life actually looks like. She reveals why curiosity — not ambition — drove every major career move she made, what she wishes someone had t...

Today we're dropping something a little different into your feed: a conversation from our friends at the Rapid Response podcast. Maryam was a guest on the show recently with host Bob Safian, but in the episode you’re about to hear, Bob sits down with David Ko, the CEO of Calm — the mental health and wellness app with more than 180 million downloads — right as he's announcing he's stepping down. Ko unpacks why he m...

Parul Somani was 31 years old, holding her one-week-old newborn, when her phone rang. It was her breast surgeon. On a Saturday. She knew it wasn't good news. What followed — cancer treatment, chemotherapy, a layoff she never saw coming, and a years-long search for work that actually meant something — would have broken most people. Instead, it rebuilt her. In this episode, Parul tells Maryam about growing up with immigra...

What does it take to walk away from everything you thought you wanted? Artist C. Finley knows. She was pre-law, headed for the Supreme Court, until one semester cracked her wide open and changed the entire trajectory of her life. Today she's a renowned muralist, large-scale painter, and the force behind the Every Woman Biennial — but the path here was anything but straight. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Finley gets hone...

What does it take to walk into a failing company with zero experience and turn it around? Patrick Steel — former CEO of Politico — did exactly that. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Patrick shares with Maryam how he navigated multiple career pivots: from the Clinton White House to investment banking to leading one of Washington's most powerful media brands. We cover imposter syndrome, recovering from public failure, ...

​​What happens when a high-achieving executive loses everything — and has to start over? Shelley Huff spent decades climbing the corporate ladder, from merchant at Walmart to Fortune's Most Powerful Women list, to CEO of Serta Simmons Bedding. Then came bankruptcy, betrayal, and a firing she never got to say goodbye from. In this raw and honest conversation, Shelly opens up to Maryam about panic disorder in the workplace, the...

This is the world Kim Hastreiter built: Paper Magazine. Stuff. Joey Arias. Salvador Dali. Barbara Streisand. Nora Ephron. Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis. Andy Warhol. Keith Haring. Bill Cunningham. Soho Weekly News. Michael Musto. Sex Pistols. Michael Stipe. Larry Kramer. And on and on. She is one of one, a cultural trailblazer in New York City and beyond. In this enlightening conversation, Kim gets honest with Maryam about the moments...

What happens when a high-powered career hits unexpected turns? In this deeply personal episode of The Messy Parts, host Maryam Banikarim flips the script as her sister, award-winning journalist Susie Banikarim, interviews her about the defining — and messy — moments behind her remarkable journey. Maryam shares stories of growing up between cultures, navigating grief after losing her father, and building a bold career ac...

Katrina Markoff built a globally successful chocolate empire, only to lose it all in a devastating corporate and personal betrayal. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Katrina gets real with Maryam about burnout, identity loss, and the fear of starting over. From staying too long in “safe” situations to learning how to trust her instincts again, Katrina shares the messy in-between moments most people hide. She and Marya...

What happens 48 hours after you get fired? For Melissa Ben-Ishay, it was the beginning of Baked by Melissa. But this isn’t just a startup success story — it’s a conversation about rejection, imposter syndrome, and learning to own your voice. Melissa reveals to Maryam how she built a cupcake brand from her apartment, rode the subway making deliveries, and still didn’t believe she deserved to be CEO of the com...