September 29, 2025 • 30 mins
What happens when you decide to completely rewrite your life story in midlife? At 48, I've transformed from weighing 390 pounds and drowning in debt to losing over 150 pounds, becoming debt-free, and discovering a passion for wellness that I never knew existed.
This episode dives into the mindset shift that changed everything: recognizing that we are the writers, directors, and main actors in our own stories. When you don't like how your story is playing out, you have the power to change it—regardless of your age or past experiences. The future truly is a clean slate waiting for your reinvention.
After hitting a frustrating 45-day weight loss plateau, I share exactly how I broke through with strategic changes to my routine. From increasing fiber intake to 25 grams daily and restructuring my eating schedule to front-load calories earlier in the day, these practical adjustments yielded immediate results. My 5 AM gym sessions, lunchtime walks, and morning stretching routine might sound ambitious, but I'll explain how they've become non-negotiable anchors in my transformation journey.
Beyond physical changes, we explore the concept of "romanticizing" everyday life in midlife—playing French jazz while cooking or placing fresh flowers in unexpected places to create moments of joy and beauty in ordinary routines. These small yet powerful practices remind us that life is meant to be savored at every age.
Perhaps most importantly, we tackle the often misunderstood concept of boundaries. Rather than walls that push people away, boundaries are actually love notes to ourselves that honor our needs and protect our peace. Learn the critical difference between trying to control others versus clearly communicating how you'll respond to certain behaviors, and why following through on boundaries is an essential act of self-respect.
Whether you're looking to transform your health, relationships, or simply rediscover joy in midlife, this episode offers both inspiration and practical strategies to help you protect your glow and step confidently into your next chapter. Your midlife reinvention starts now!
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Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_00 (01:01):
Well, hello.
It's episode 19 of the MidlightGlow Report.
I'm Jax, your host.
So happy to be here today andthis week with you.
Um, so today is going to be alittle bit of a shorter uh
podcast episode.
I'm going to touch on somethings.
And um, so I was a little bitout of a time crunch this past
(01:22):
week putting this episodetogether, but we will make do
with what we have.
Um, today I'll be giving yousome Monday mindset um idea, and
then I will be discussing myweight loss journey and how I
have recently broken a plateau,a long-standing plateau.
(01:44):
Um, and then um how I'm uh twonew ways on romanticizing my
life now at 48 years old, andthen um some items I've bought
recently from Amazon that I wantto highlight and I'll link in
the show notes, and finally justa quick life coaching chat about
boundaries.
(02:05):
So, yeah, we'll get started hereright now.
So, this is the Monday mindsetfor today.
Rewriting your story.
The first time I came acrossthis um idea was about three and
a half years ago.
This was my lowest point inlife, really, when I weighed
about 390 pounds.
(02:26):
I was in debt over my head,living paycheck to paycheck.
I had just gotten laid off froman amazing position as an
underwriter that I workedremotely for a while.
And so this is the concept.
You are the writer, director,and main actor of your story.
(02:50):
So if you don't like how thestory is playing out, change it.
It doesn't matter what happenedin your past, the future is a
clean slate, you can reinventyourself.
Every day brings with it theopportunities to start a new
life.
You get to choose your identityat each and every moment.
(03:14):
So who are you going to be?
It's up to you to decide whoyou're going to be from this day
on.
What are you going to do?
So now at 48 years old, I canliterally say I love the gym.
I love wellness.
I love healthy nutrition.
I have dropped over 150 pounds.
(03:35):
I love mindset.
I love well-being.
I have always loved skincare,but now I see the importance of
it.
I always have loved style, butnow I have the confidence to
wear it.
I am no longer in debt.
I have paid over$32,000 in debt.
Um, and I no longer have hardlyany credit card debt.
(03:58):
I am in a good place.
It took me three years to get tothis point, and I still have
more to go on this journey.
I still have weight to lose.
I still have some certificationsI want to get.
I want to get my coachingbusiness um all up and ready.
I want to get retreats in thefuture, and I want to get this
(04:18):
as a full-time gig.
So this is something I'm workingon on my journey.
And this is why I show up onlineto keep myself accountable and
to help other women like me,like you, who are looking to
reinvent or improve themselves,you know, 40 or over in midlife,
and glow up and make positivechanges in their life, that it
(04:41):
is possible, that it's never toolate.
It's not going to be easy, andyou will need discipline,
patience, and persistence.
But the results will come.
It is your time to make someeffort and persist, persist and
persist.
You cannot give up.
You need to fasten yourseatbelts and have some fun.
(05:04):
It is time to glow up andreinvent yourself if you are
looking to make changes.
So that is what I wanted to talkabout Monday mindset that you
are the main character and it'snever too late to reinvent
yourself.
I am an example of that.
So, next we will talk about um aplateau that I've been on for
(05:29):
the last 45 days or so.
It broke last week.
Um, I'm so excited.
I know it sounds so, you know,minor, but I lost three pounds
last week, which is huge whenyou're just flatlining for
about, you know, over a monthand you're doing everything
you're supposed to do.
But I did do make some changesand I'll let you know what they
(05:50):
what I'm doing right now andwhat's working.
So I did increase my fiberintake.
I was doing about 15, 20 grams,and now I'm doing about 25 grams
of fruit and vegetable fiber.
So um it really has made such adifference, I think.
I think that is a huge, hugebenefit.
You know, fiber is is not ashighlighted.
(06:12):
Everyone talks about the macros,carbs, fats, proteins, but fiber
is so important, especially inmidlife.
Fruits and vegetable fiber.
Um, so I've increased that.
And that was about 10 days ago.
Um, so that really maybe kickedit in gear, I'm thinking, to
help me lose the three poundsthis past week.
(06:33):
Um, I'm going to the gymconsistently four days a week.
I use the weight machines forabout 30, 35 minutes.
I will do hit for 20 minutes.
Um, and then I will sit in thesauna, which I absolutely love.
And uh I'll do that for 15minutes.
Sometimes I have to scoot outthere early because I have my
(06:53):
phone in there with me and itoverheats.
So I have to be careful withthat.
I don't want to break my phone.
But um I have the sauna, andthat is how I start my mornings.
I go early in the morning.
I leave my house at 4:30, 4:45.
I am in the gym by 5 or 10 to 5,and I'm out of the gym by 6
o'clock, uh, 6, 6.15.
(07:13):
I am home and I'm ready toshower, wash my face, get my
makeup on, dress, um, have aquick breakfast, pack my lunch,
grab my water and coffee, andout the door to work by 7:50.
So that is how I work it in themornings.
And on non-work days, I may go alittle bit later, maybe between
five and six, but I really loveworking out in the morning.
(07:35):
It sets my whole day and I justfeel so accomplished by the time
six, seven o'clock a.m.
rolls around.
I mean, I've done so much and itfeels amazing.
Um, so I'm going to the gymconsistently.
I am walking every day at lunchduring work days.
I walk, uh, I'll either walk apark or I'll walk to Target and
(07:55):
I'll walk walk the plaza therebecause we're in a plaza, my
bank.
Um, so I will walk around.
You know, weather's been reallygood lately.
If weather turns bad, I willwalk TJ Maxx or Target and or
Sephora, which is right down theway.
And I'll I did that that toothis past week.
I browsed um Sephora, which wasso fun, you know, to see what's
(08:18):
new and what's out.
Um, I did not bring my wallet,so I did not, I was on a
spending spree, which is so easyto do at Sephora.
But um I did browse, and there'sa lot of good things out there
right now and some things I dowant to try.
Um, so I do my walking every dayum for about 30 to 40 minutes,
(08:41):
um, even on gym days.
Um, and I uh startedincorporating stretching in the
mornings.
I wake up, I get my water, uh,tongue scrape, get my water, get
my coffee, and um I do mystretches.
I use an app called the Bendapp, and I do some stretches
from this app.
Um, I do it for about 15 minutesand I feel so good afterwards.
(09:05):
I feel alive and awake.
This really awakens me, and mybody is so flexible, it's
getting better and better.
I've been doing that for abouttwo weeks, and that is so
important, especially whenyou're over 40, to keep your
body flexible and moving.
So I'm doing the Bend app.
Um, I have switched my eatinghabits.
(09:25):
Uh, before I was fasting fromlike seven or eight o'clock at
night till one o'clock the nextPM the next day.
I am no longer doing that.
I am eating a large, healthybreakfast.
I'm either having eggs andvegetables or I'm having protein
coffee and fruit.
And so I'm getting enoughprotein.
Um, when I have the eggs andvegetables, I may throw in some
(09:47):
chicken sausage as well.
So I'm getting about 20 to 30grams of protein plus fiber.
And um I eat that before I go towork.
And then I have a medium-sizedlunch, you know, a protein and a
vegetable, and um, and then asmaller dinner, a protein, some
vegetable and fruit, smallerthan I was used to eating.
(10:10):
So I've I've I've heavied theload in the morning and
diminished by dinner time comes.
And so at 6 o'clock p.m., I amdone eating, and then I won't
eat till 715 a.m.
the next day.
And so yeah, that's what I'mdoing regarding my eating
habits.
Um, I only drink water, blackcoffee, unsweetened green tea,
(10:32):
and low sodium beef bone broth.
That's all I drink.
That's it.
Um, and I do have a ton ofwater.
Um, I'm gonna cut back on thecoffee.
I went for blood work yesterday,just um uh semi-annual follow-up
blood work, and I had to fastbecause my blood work
appointment was not till uh 4 or4:30 p.m.
in the afternoon.
(10:53):
So I did have to fast, um, whichwas difficult, but I'm telling
you how dependent I am oncaffeine.
I did not realize I had aheadache all day, and then I
literally had some green teawhen I got home after the blood
work appointment and my headachedisappeared.
I am so dependent on green tea,and I have to wean myself off of
that.
(11:13):
So that is something I'mstarting this weekend.
I'm going to drink less and lesscoffee and green tea.
Green tea doesn't have as muchcaffeine, but it does have some.
It doesn't have as much ascoffee.
But the coffee I've beendrinking does have a lot of
caffeine, the cold brew, and Ineed to wean myself off of it
and diminish some of it.
So that's something I'm startingthis weekend.
(11:35):
I I'm really dependent on it andthat's not healthy.
Um, I am eating between 1,400and 1,500 calories per day.
Um, so that's my calorie intake.
I do take supplementssupplements every morning.
Um, and um I take it with my mybreakfast, and I use a stand-up
desk at work.
I am in a sit-down positionoffice environment, and um I
(12:01):
every 45 minutes I have a timeron my phone.
It dings.
I stand, I lift my stand-updesk, and I I move.
I stretch, I move, I twist, Itouch my toes, and I I kind of
like um uh set step side to sideum while I'm listening to music
in one ear or podcast, waitingto speak to a client.
(12:24):
So yeah, I have used thestand-up desk for about every 45
minutes, I stand for 15 minutesand do some movement.
So that is what I've beenincorporating lately.
So yeah, something I'm startingnew this week.
I'm gonna be doing it everythree months for five days, is
the Proloan reset.
(12:44):
Uh, Proloan P-R-O-L-O-N.
I don't know if any of you heardof that.
It's been out for a while.
Um, it's a reset uhnutritionally uh with uh your
cellular cells.
Um I'm really excited to try it.
This will be my first time.
It's supposed to come in theshipment today.
Um, I'm a big believer of thehealth benefits regarding
(13:07):
fasting and what it causes isautophagy, which is kind of a
cleaning, a spring cleaning ofyour cells, your cellular uh
makeup.
Um, it clears out waste, itboosts energy, it supports
longevity and improvesresilience.
Uh, when you experienceautophagy, it's usually when
(13:29):
you're fasting or when you'reexercising, or of course when
you sleep.
That's why sleep is soimportant.
It really cleans out all thosedead cells, those zombie cells.
Um, so it really is beneficialuh for health.
Um, so this will rejuvenate mycells for five days and uh reset
(13:49):
my body.
It is science-backed and itactivates cellular cleansing
through the process again ofautophagy.
Um, you also will lose weight.
Um, it clears out cellular wastewhile protecting your muscles
and supports your overall healthwhile nourishing your body.
So it's it's a I got the NextGenpackage, which is 100% organic
(14:12):
pre-made soups and bars,crackers and olives.
That's all you eat for fivedays.
Um, organic tree or tea, and Idrink to preserve muscle.
So it comes with organic tea uhthat preserves muscle.
Uh the cost was$215 uh for thefive-day uh supplement plan, the
(14:33):
food plan.
Um so I obviously bought veryless in groceries this past week
or for this coming week.
I just bought from my son.
Um so uh there was a discount.
I got 20% off.
Um I'm really excited to trythis.
You know, of course, I'll seethe scale moved, but just uh the
reset of my cellular healthreally will do uh, I think a
(14:57):
drastic improvement.
Um so I'm I'm excited aboutthis.
I know many women here onlinehave tried it and documented it.
Um I will uh let you know nextweek how it went and what the
results were, obviously with thescale, but how I felt, how I
did, you know, if it if I was atall full or if I struggled.
(15:18):
But it is a sense of fasting forfive days, but you are getting
nourishment from the food andteas and bars and crackers and
olives.
They are, you know, you know,nutritionally designed to give
you enough nutrients and proteinto preserve that muscle and keep
you going, but to alsoexperience autophagy, which is
(15:38):
that cellular reset.
So, yep, I'm trying prolongreset uh starting uh probably
today or tomorrow, once theshipment comes in.
So that's something new I'mtrying.
Um, next, uh, I'm gonna talkabout romanticizing your life in
midlife.
Yes, all the young girlies doit, and you know, I'm doing it
(15:59):
too.
I hope you give it a try.
Um, I mentioned it last week, acouple things I did, and I did
something uh new this past week,two new things.
So in my kitchen, when I'mcooking or getting ready,
putting the dishes away,cleaning up, setting the table
for dinner, um, you know,cleaning, um, just in there in
(16:20):
general, or when I'm doinglaundry or um, you know, uh
cleaning, dusting the house,things like that.
Um, I'm playing French jazzmusic in the background.
Isn't that different?
It kind of projects anatmosphere of elegance, you
know, it's timeless French jazzmusic.
(16:42):
It's a romantic quality.
Um when it fills up the room, itfeels like you've transported
yourself to a cozy Parisiancafe.
Uh suddenly your kitchen isn'tjust a kitchen, right?
So that's something else I'vebeen doing.
It boosts joy and energy, theupbeat rhythms.
Um, it kind of is a playfulmelody that activates your brain
(17:05):
dopamine pathways, makingroutine chores feel lighter,
right?
Feel fun.
You have fun energy, fun music.
Um, the other thing I'veincorporated is I bought some
fresh flowers and I put them inuh different, different areas of
my home.
I put a vase with fresh flowersin my foyer, and I also put a
(17:26):
vase of flowers in my mainbathroom.
So I thought that would be kindof surprise and delight in the
everyday, right?
It's different places to see andsmell fresh flowers.
It's unexpected.
Um, it creates a little momentof surprise.
Um, so that's something else Idid.
It um, you know, when you're inthe foyer um and you come into
(17:50):
the house, it kind of sets thetone of when you leave and come
into the home by seeing andsmelling these fresh flowers.
It engages the senses, thefragrance and the color and the
texture of the flowers.
So yeah, in short, flowers inyour foyer and your bathroom
transform routine moments, youknow, like walking in the door,
(18:11):
brushing your teeth intooccasions that whisper life is
meant to be savored.
So yeah, that's how I've beenromanticizing my light, fresh
flowers in my foyer andbathroom, and then playing
French jazz music as I cook andclean in the house.
So those are two things youcould try something fun and
romantic and light and reallybring some joy to yourself in
(18:35):
the everyday tasks.
So yeah, that's that's somethingI've been doing.
So I think I mentioned last weekthat I became an Amazon-approved
influencer.
So I'm gonna throw out theresome products I recently
purchased this past week, and Iam like thoroughly impressed.
Uh, I mean, the prices are soreasonable compared to other
stores.
It's shipped right to your housein a couple days, and the
(18:58):
quality isn't really not bad.
So I bought bought a wool beltedcoat from Peace Glad.
Um, it's a winter trench coatfor women.
It's long, double-breasted,belted pea coat in camel, and it
is so cozy and it looks so goodwith jeans or with trouser
pants, and um, it's so cute, andit's like a darker camel color.
(19:21):
So I will link that in the shownotes, as well as a fall vest, a
puffer by Dakota Women'sOversized Chocolate Brown Puffer
Vest with a stand-up collar.
It's so fun, so cute.
I think all the young girliesare wearing it, and why can't I
wear it too, right?
And I love the color chocolatebrown.
I love browns, I love blacks andcreams, but browns is such a
(19:44):
rich color.
I really love it.
And then uh speaking of brown, Ibought Sam Edelman Women's Talus
Sneakers in Cafe Noir andAntique White.
So these are brown sneakers witha gum uh base, you know, that
gum-colored base with some uhantique white highlights.
They're super cute.
(20:05):
I think a lot of them are soldout, but you can get them at
like Nordstrom's or whatnot.
But I think they were like$90 or$110 on Amazon.
So I will link that and the fallvest and the wool coat in the
show notes.
Super cute, super fun.
All the fall vibes, and you'vegot to check them out.
Um, I'm getting my Amazoninfluencer shop um page already.
(20:29):
I've been adding all myfavorites that I literally
owned.
This is stuff I own and love,and that I am highlighting on my
page and suggesting that youcheck out and possibly buy if it
fits your needs.
Um, so I am putting that shoppage together.
It does take some time becausethere's a lot of thought with
(20:50):
it, right?
I want to make sure I'm doingthings that I know and love and
that are worth the money.
Um, I don't want to representmyself incorrectly or the
products that I suggest.
And I want to encourage ifyou're looking for a puffer and
I found one, check out my site.
So that should be up and runningwithin the next couple weeks.
(21:13):
But um, yeah, um, so I will linkthese three items in the show
notes.
Okay, so this is how we're gonnaend the episode with a life
coaching chat.
We're going to be, it's gonna bea little bit serious, but not
really.
I'll keep it as light aspossible.
This life coaching chat today isabout boundaries and creating
boundaries out of love foryourself and others.
(21:35):
So this is some real talk, andboundaries are one of the most
misunderstood but powerful toolswe have in midlife to protect
our peace, create healthyrelationships, and step into our
reinvention with confidence.
So we're gonna touch onboundaries.
For many of us, boundaries soundscary.
(21:56):
We think of them as that willpush people away, cause
conflict, and make it seem thatmake us seem difficult.
But here's the truth (22:05):
boundaries aren't walls.
They're love notes to ourselves,they're how you honor your
needs, your values, and yourworth.
So, what are boundaries reallyand what they aren't?
Boundaries aren't aboutcontrolling other people.
That is not what they're about.
Um, how you can't make anyonebehave in a certain way.
(22:28):
Instead, boundaries are clearguidelines you set for yourself
what you will and won't allow inyour life.
Think of it like this (22:37):
a boundary is saying, here's how I
will respond if this happens.
It's not saying you must do thisor else.
That's not what a boundary is.
An example, um, you a manualcontrol.
You can't ever raise your voiceat me.
Um, that is a manual.
(22:58):
That is not healthy.
A boundary, which is a self-careum item, a practice, is if you
raise your voice, I will leavethe room.
That is a correct way, and thatis a boundary.
Do you see the difference?
You're not telling someone notto raise their voice.
You're saying if they raisetheir voice, I am going to leave
the room.
(23:19):
So you're not trying to controlthem, you're giving your
response.
And um, so that is what acorrect boundary is.
Uh, why we struggle withboundaries?
Many women um that I've spokento, um, especially in my
coaching training, uh, theystruggle to set and keep
boundaries.
(23:39):
And the reason why is they'reafraid of conflict.
We as women are usually afraidof conflict.
We don't want to hurt anyone'sfeelings.
We seriously hope people willjust know what we need.
We worry we'll lose therelationship if we speak our
truth.
But here's the catch (23:57):
when you don't set boundaries, resentment
builds up.
You end up frustrated, drained,and even angry because people
keep crossing invisible linesthat don't that they don't even
know exist.
So that is uh some of theboundaries.
(24:18):
Um boundaries are how you showpeople where your lines are.
Without them, intimacy suffers.
With them, relationships becomeclearer, healthier, and more
real.
So that's why boundaries are soimportant.
From a neuroscience perspectiveregarding boundaries, um, they
(24:38):
help regulate your nervoussystem.
When you're clear about whatyou'll tolerate, your brain
doesn't have to stay consistentin a fight or flight mode, um,
scanning for threats ordisappointments.
Boundaries give your brainpredictability and safety.
And when your nervous systemfeels safe, you have more
energy, focus, and creativityfor things you actually want in
(25:02):
midlife, whether that's wellnessstyle, relationships, or
rediscovering your passions.
Boundaries are healthy, even ina neuroscience perspective.
Um, the hard part is thefollowing through, right?
Here's where it gets tricky,tricky.
It's one thing to say, if you doX, I'll do Y.
(25:23):
It's another to actually followthrough.
This is where most of us getstuck.
We think, well, I don't want toupset them, or maybe they didn't
mean it.
And so we back down.
But when you don't followthrough, you teach yourself and
others that boundaries aren'treal.
That's when resentment, drama,and anger really starts bubbling
(25:44):
up.
So following through is an actof self-love.
It says, I matter, my peacematters, my truth matters.
So in truth, boundaries are anact of love.
The most powerful boundariescome not from anger, but from
love.
When you work through yourfeelings until you feel calm and
say, Here's my truth.
(26:04):
You set boundaries in a way thatinvites deeper connection.
Boundaries set with love soundlike I care about you, and this
is what I need to take care ofmyself.
I love our relationship too muchto stay quiet, too much to stay
quiet when I hurt, when I feelhurt.
This is what I will do to honormyself, these boundaries.
(26:27):
And yes, sometimes you have tobe willing to sacrifice the
relationship if boundaries areviolated repeatedly.
That's not selfish.
That is a sense of self-respect.
So those people who who who areyour triggers are actually your
teachers.
Ever notice how certain peoplepush all your buttons?
Those are often your greatestteachers.
(26:49):
Why?
Because they show you exactlywhere you need boundaries.
Instead of spiraling infrustration, you ask yourself,
what boundary would protect mypeace here?
What truth am I afraid to speak?
What am I tolerating that I nolonger want to tolerate?
Every time you set an honor aboundary, you grow in courage
(27:13):
and authenticity.
So here are some ways to flexthat boundary muscle or those
muscles.
This is a way to practice yourboundaries.
You can use a journal prompt,write down one area where you
feel resentment or frustration.
Ask yourself, what boundarywould release this?
You could practice saying it outloud in the mirror, rehearse
(27:35):
boundary statements calmly andlovingly as an example.
If you cancel last minute, Iwon't reschedule.
That is a boundary you couldpractice in the mirror.
You could do a boundary audit,list three situations where you
often feel drained.
What clear requests andconsequence can you create?
(27:56):
You can have a boundary buddy,share a boundary with a trusted
friend or family member who canlovingly hold you accountable.
And then you could do aself-compassion ritual every
time you follow through on aboundary, celebrate it with a
small act of love, a walk, ajournal entry, or a simple
acknowledgement of your courageto act.
(28:17):
So, as a closing, boundariesaren't about pushing people
away.
They're about drawing closer toyourself, your truth, your
values, your peace.
When you love yourself enough toset boundaries, you invite
others to love you moreauthentically too.
So this midlife is your seasonto awaken, to step into
reinvention and to stoptolerating anything that dims
(28:40):
your glow.
Boundaries of how you protectyour glow.
You don't have to shout, fight,or control.
You just have to stand in love,courage, and clarity.
That's when midlife becomes themost beautiful chapter in your
life.
So keep glowing and honor yourboundaries.
(29:01):
So that's it.
That's a wrap of episode 19 withthe Midlife Glow report report.
Um, I'm Jax, and I thank you forsticking along for this entire
episode.
If you did, um, if this episodespoke to you, I would be kind
enough to leave a review.
It helps other women like youfind this podcast.
(29:24):
Um, so if you'd be kindly toleave a review, you can find me
on social media at jax styles, JA X S T Y S on Instagram, uh,
Facebook, uh, TikTok, threads,uh, even Pinterest, which I'm
starting to create new boards.
Um, so you can find me on if youhave questions or suggestions of
(29:47):
what I should cover orquestions, you could DM me.
Um, you could text me throughthis podcast as well.
So check out the show notes.
I thank you for listening.
I thank you for your time.
I hope you have an amazing weekahead.
And I will check in next week.
Thanks again.
Love Jax.
Well, hello.
It's episode 19 of the MidlightGlow Report.
I'm Jax, your host.
So happy to be here today andthis week with you.
Um, so today is going to be alittle bit of a shorter uh
podcast episode.
I'm going to touch on somethings.
And um, so I was a little bitout of a time crunch this past
(01:22):
week putting this episodetogether, but we will make do
with what we have.
Um, today I'll be giving yousome Monday mindset um idea, and
then I will be discussing myweight loss journey and how I
have recently broken a plateau,a long-standing plateau.
(01:44):
Um, and then um how I'm uh twonew ways on romanticizing my
life now at 48 years old, andthen um some items I've bought
recently from Amazon that I wantto highlight and I'll link in
the show notes, and finally justa quick life coaching chat about
boundaries.
(02:05):
So, yeah, we'll get started hereright now.
So, this is the Monday mindsetfor today.
Rewriting your story.
The first time I came acrossthis um idea was about three and
a half years ago.
This was my lowest point inlife, really, when I weighed
about 390 pounds.
(02:26):
I was in debt over my head,living paycheck to paycheck.
I had just gotten laid off froman amazing position as an
underwriter that I workedremotely for a while.
And so this is the concept.
You are the writer, director,and main actor of your story.
(02:50):
So if you don't like how thestory is playing out, change it.
It doesn't matter what happenedin your past, the future is a
clean slate, you can reinventyourself.
Every day brings with it theopportunities to start a new
life.
You get to choose your identityat each and every moment.
(03:14):
So who are you going to be?
It's up to you to decide whoyou're going to be from this day
on.
What are you going to do?
So now at 48 years old, I canliterally say I love the gym.
I love wellness.
I love healthy nutrition.
I have dropped over 150 pounds.
(03:35):
I love mindset.
I love well-being.
I have always loved skincare,but now I see the importance of
it.
I always have loved style, butnow I have the confidence to
wear it.
I am no longer in debt.
I have paid over$32,000 in debt.
Um, and I no longer have hardlyany credit card debt.
(03:58):
I am in a good place.
It took me three years to get tothis point, and I still have
more to go on this journey.
I still have weight to lose.
I still have some certificationsI want to get.
I want to get my coachingbusiness um all up and ready.
I want to get retreats in thefuture, and I want to get this
(04:18):
as a full-time gig.
So this is something I'm workingon on my journey.
And this is why I show up onlineto keep myself accountable and
to help other women like me,like you, who are looking to
reinvent or improve themselves,you know, 40 or over in midlife,
and glow up and make positivechanges in their life, that it
(04:41):
is possible, that it's never toolate.
It's not going to be easy, andyou will need discipline,
patience, and persistence.
But the results will come.
It is your time to make someeffort and persist, persist and
persist.
You cannot give up.
You need to fasten yourseatbelts and have some fun.
(05:04):
It is time to glow up andreinvent yourself if you are
looking to make changes.
So that is what I wanted to talkabout Monday mindset that you
are the main character and it'snever too late to reinvent
yourself.
I am an example of that.
So, next we will talk about um aplateau that I've been on for
(05:29):
the last 45 days or so.
It broke last week.
Um, I'm so excited.
I know it sounds so, you know,minor, but I lost three pounds
last week, which is huge whenyou're just flatlining for
about, you know, over a monthand you're doing everything
you're supposed to do.
But I did do make some changesand I'll let you know what they
(05:50):
what I'm doing right now andwhat's working.
So I did increase my fiberintake.
I was doing about 15, 20 grams,and now I'm doing about 25 grams
of fruit and vegetable fiber.
So um it really has made such adifference, I think.
I think that is a huge, hugebenefit.
You know, fiber is is not ashighlighted.
(06:12):
Everyone talks about the macros,carbs, fats, proteins, but fiber
is so important, especially inmidlife.
Fruits and vegetable fiber.
Um, so I've increased that.
And that was about 10 days ago.
Um, so that really maybe kickedit in gear, I'm thinking, to
help me lose the three poundsthis past week.
(06:33):
Um, I'm going to the gymconsistently four days a week.
I use the weight machines forabout 30, 35 minutes.
I will do hit for 20 minutes.
Um, and then I will sit in thesauna, which I absolutely love.
And uh I'll do that for 15minutes.
Sometimes I have to scoot outthere early because I have my
(06:53):
phone in there with me and itoverheats.
So I have to be careful withthat.
I don't want to break my phone.
But um I have the sauna, andthat is how I start my mornings.
I go early in the morning.
I leave my house at 4:30, 4:45.
I am in the gym by 5 or 10 to 5,and I'm out of the gym by 6
o'clock, uh, 6, 6.15.
(07:13):
I am home and I'm ready toshower, wash my face, get my
makeup on, dress, um, have aquick breakfast, pack my lunch,
grab my water and coffee, andout the door to work by 7:50.
So that is how I work it in themornings.
And on non-work days, I may go alittle bit later, maybe between
five and six, but I really loveworking out in the morning.
(07:35):
It sets my whole day and I justfeel so accomplished by the time
six, seven o'clock a.m.
rolls around.
I mean, I've done so much and itfeels amazing.
Um, so I'm going to the gymconsistently.
I am walking every day at lunchduring work days.
I walk, uh, I'll either walk apark or I'll walk to Target and
(07:55):
I'll walk walk the plaza therebecause we're in a plaza, my
bank.
Um, so I will walk around.
You know, weather's been reallygood lately.
If weather turns bad, I willwalk TJ Maxx or Target and or
Sephora, which is right down theway.
And I'll I did that that toothis past week.
I browsed um Sephora, which wasso fun, you know, to see what's
(08:18):
new and what's out.
Um, I did not bring my wallet,so I did not, I was on a
spending spree, which is so easyto do at Sephora.
But um I did browse, and there'sa lot of good things out there
right now and some things I dowant to try.
Um, so I do my walking every dayum for about 30 to 40 minutes,
(08:41):
um, even on gym days.
Um, and I uh startedincorporating stretching in the
mornings.
I wake up, I get my water, uh,tongue scrape, get my water, get
my coffee, and um I do mystretches.
I use an app called the Bendapp, and I do some stretches
from this app.
Um, I do it for about 15 minutesand I feel so good afterwards.
(09:05):
I feel alive and awake.
This really awakens me, and mybody is so flexible, it's
getting better and better.
I've been doing that for abouttwo weeks, and that is so
important, especially whenyou're over 40, to keep your
body flexible and moving.
So I'm doing the Bend app.
Um, I have switched my eatinghabits.
(09:25):
Uh, before I was fasting fromlike seven or eight o'clock at
night till one o'clock the nextPM the next day.
I am no longer doing that.
I am eating a large, healthybreakfast.
I'm either having eggs andvegetables or I'm having protein
coffee and fruit.
And so I'm getting enoughprotein.
Um, when I have the eggs andvegetables, I may throw in some
(09:47):
chicken sausage as well.
So I'm getting about 20 to 30grams of protein plus fiber.
And um I eat that before I go towork.
And then I have a medium-sizedlunch, you know, a protein and a
vegetable, and um, and then asmaller dinner, a protein, some
vegetable and fruit, smallerthan I was used to eating.
(10:10):
So I've I've I've heavied theload in the morning and
diminished by dinner time comes.
And so at 6 o'clock p.m., I amdone eating, and then I won't
eat till 715 a.m.
the next day.
And so yeah, that's what I'mdoing regarding my eating
habits.
Um, I only drink water, blackcoffee, unsweetened green tea,
(10:32):
and low sodium beef bone broth.
That's all I drink.
That's it.
Um, and I do have a ton ofwater.
Um, I'm gonna cut back on thecoffee.
I went for blood work yesterday,just um uh semi-annual follow-up
blood work, and I had to fastbecause my blood work
appointment was not till uh 4 or4:30 p.m.
in the afternoon.
(10:53):
So I did have to fast, um, whichwas difficult, but I'm telling
you how dependent I am oncaffeine.
I did not realize I had aheadache all day, and then I
literally had some green teawhen I got home after the blood
work appointment and my headachedisappeared.
I am so dependent on green tea,and I have to wean myself off of
that.
(11:13):
So that is something I'mstarting this weekend.
I'm going to drink less and lesscoffee and green tea.
Green tea doesn't have as muchcaffeine, but it does have some.
It doesn't have as much ascoffee.
But the coffee I've beendrinking does have a lot of
caffeine, the cold brew, and Ineed to wean myself off of it
and diminish some of it.
So that's something I'm startingthis weekend.
(11:35):
I I'm really dependent on it andthat's not healthy.
Um, I am eating between 1,400and 1,500 calories per day.
Um, so that's my calorie intake.
I do take supplementssupplements every morning.
Um, and um I take it with my mybreakfast, and I use a stand-up
desk at work.
I am in a sit-down positionoffice environment, and um I
(12:01):
every 45 minutes I have a timeron my phone.
It dings.
I stand, I lift my stand-updesk, and I I move.
I stretch, I move, I twist, Itouch my toes, and I I kind of
like um uh set step side to sideum while I'm listening to music
in one ear or podcast, waitingto speak to a client.
(12:24):
So yeah, I have used thestand-up desk for about every 45
minutes, I stand for 15 minutesand do some movement.
So that is what I've beenincorporating lately.
So yeah, something I'm startingnew this week.
I'm gonna be doing it everythree months for five days, is
the Proloan reset.
(12:44):
Uh, Proloan P-R-O-L-O-N.
I don't know if any of you heardof that.
It's been out for a while.
Um, it's a reset uhnutritionally uh with uh your
cellular cells.
Um I'm really excited to try it.
This will be my first time.
It's supposed to come in theshipment today.
Um, I'm a big believer of thehealth benefits regarding
(13:07):
fasting and what it causes isautophagy, which is kind of a
cleaning, a spring cleaning ofyour cells, your cellular uh
makeup.
Um, it clears out waste, itboosts energy, it supports
longevity and improvesresilience.
Uh, when you experienceautophagy, it's usually when
(13:29):
you're fasting or when you'reexercising, or of course when
you sleep.
That's why sleep is soimportant.
It really cleans out all thosedead cells, those zombie cells.
Um, so it really is beneficialuh for health.
Um, so this will rejuvenate mycells for five days and uh reset
(13:49):
my body.
It is science-backed and itactivates cellular cleansing
through the process again ofautophagy.
Um, you also will lose weight.
Um, it clears out cellular wastewhile protecting your muscles
and supports your overall healthwhile nourishing your body.
So it's it's a I got the NextGenpackage, which is 100% organic
(14:12):
pre-made soups and bars,crackers and olives.
That's all you eat for fivedays.
Um, organic tree or tea, and Idrink to preserve muscle.
So it comes with organic tea uhthat preserves muscle.
Uh the cost was$215 uh for thefive-day uh supplement plan, the
(14:33):
food plan.
Um so I obviously bought veryless in groceries this past week
or for this coming week.
I just bought from my son.
Um so uh there was a discount.
I got 20% off.
Um I'm really excited to trythis.
You know, of course, I'll seethe scale moved, but just uh the
reset of my cellular healthreally will do uh, I think a
(14:57):
drastic improvement.
Um so I'm I'm excited aboutthis.
I know many women here onlinehave tried it and documented it.
Um I will uh let you know nextweek how it went and what the
results were, obviously with thescale, but how I felt, how I
did, you know, if it if I was atall full or if I struggled.
(15:18):
But it is a sense of fasting forfive days, but you are getting
nourishment from the food andteas and bars and crackers and
olives.
They are, you know, you know,nutritionally designed to give
you enough nutrients and proteinto preserve that muscle and keep
you going, but to alsoexperience autophagy, which is
(15:38):
that cellular reset.
So, yep, I'm trying prolongreset uh starting uh probably
today or tomorrow, once theshipment comes in.
So that's something new I'mtrying.
Um, next, uh, I'm gonna talkabout romanticizing your life in
midlife.
Yes, all the young girlies doit, and you know, I'm doing it
(15:59):
too.
I hope you give it a try.
Um, I mentioned it last week, acouple things I did, and I did
something uh new this past week,two new things.
So in my kitchen, when I'mcooking or getting ready,
putting the dishes away,cleaning up, setting the table
for dinner, um, you know,cleaning, um, just in there in
(16:20):
general, or when I'm doinglaundry or um, you know, uh
cleaning, dusting the house,things like that.
Um, I'm playing French jazzmusic in the background.
Isn't that different?
It kind of projects anatmosphere of elegance, you
know, it's timeless French jazzmusic.
(16:42):
It's a romantic quality.
Um when it fills up the room, itfeels like you've transported
yourself to a cozy Parisiancafe.
Uh suddenly your kitchen isn'tjust a kitchen, right?
So that's something else I'vebeen doing.
It boosts joy and energy, theupbeat rhythms.
Um, it kind of is a playfulmelody that activates your brain
(17:05):
dopamine pathways, makingroutine chores feel lighter,
right?
Feel fun.
You have fun energy, fun music.
Um, the other thing I'veincorporated is I bought some
fresh flowers and I put them inuh different, different areas of
my home.
I put a vase with fresh flowersin my foyer, and I also put a
(17:26):
vase of flowers in my mainbathroom.
So I thought that would be kindof surprise and delight in the
everyday, right?
It's different places to see andsmell fresh flowers.
It's unexpected.
Um, it creates a little momentof surprise.
Um, so that's something else Idid.
It um, you know, when you're inthe foyer um and you come into
(17:50):
the house, it kind of sets thetone of when you leave and come
into the home by seeing andsmelling these fresh flowers.
It engages the senses, thefragrance and the color and the
texture of the flowers.
So yeah, in short, flowers inyour foyer and your bathroom
transform routine moments, youknow, like walking in the door,
(18:11):
brushing your teeth intooccasions that whisper life is
meant to be savored.
So yeah, that's how I've beenromanticizing my light, fresh
flowers in my foyer andbathroom, and then playing
French jazz music as I cook andclean in the house.
So those are two things youcould try something fun and
romantic and light and reallybring some joy to yourself in
(18:35):
the everyday tasks.
So yeah, that's that's somethingI've been doing.
So I think I mentioned last weekthat I became an Amazon-approved
influencer.
So I'm gonna throw out theresome products I recently
purchased this past week, and Iam like thoroughly impressed.
Uh, I mean, the prices are soreasonable compared to other
stores.
It's shipped right to your housein a couple days, and the
(18:58):
quality isn't really not bad.
So I bought bought a wool beltedcoat from Peace Glad.
Um, it's a winter trench coatfor women.
It's long, double-breasted,belted pea coat in camel, and it
is so cozy and it looks so goodwith jeans or with trouser
pants, and um, it's so cute, andit's like a darker camel color.
(19:21):
So I will link that in the shownotes, as well as a fall vest, a
puffer by Dakota Women'sOversized Chocolate Brown Puffer
Vest with a stand-up collar.
It's so fun, so cute.
I think all the young girliesare wearing it, and why can't I
wear it too, right?
And I love the color chocolatebrown.
I love browns, I love blacks andcreams, but browns is such a
(19:44):
rich color.
I really love it.
And then uh speaking of brown, Ibought Sam Edelman Women's Talus
Sneakers in Cafe Noir andAntique White.
So these are brown sneakers witha gum uh base, you know, that
gum-colored base with some uhantique white highlights.
They're super cute.
(20:05):
I think a lot of them are soldout, but you can get them at
like Nordstrom's or whatnot.
But I think they were like$90 or$110 on Amazon.
So I will link that and the fallvest and the wool coat in the
show notes.
Super cute, super fun.
All the fall vibes, and you'vegot to check them out.
Um, I'm getting my Amazoninfluencer shop um page already.
(20:29):
I've been adding all myfavorites that I literally
owned.
This is stuff I own and love,and that I am highlighting on my
page and suggesting that youcheck out and possibly buy if it
fits your needs.
Um, so I am putting that shoppage together.
It does take some time becausethere's a lot of thought with
(20:50):
it, right?
I want to make sure I'm doingthings that I know and love and
that are worth the money.
Um, I don't want to representmyself incorrectly or the
products that I suggest.
And I want to encourage ifyou're looking for a puffer and
I found one, check out my site.
So that should be up and runningwithin the next couple weeks.
(21:13):
But um, yeah, um, so I will linkthese three items in the show
notes.
Okay, so this is how we're gonnaend the episode with a life
coaching chat.
We're going to be, it's gonna bea little bit serious, but not
really.
I'll keep it as light aspossible.
This life coaching chat today isabout boundaries and creating
boundaries out of love foryourself and others.
(21:35):
So this is some real talk, andboundaries are one of the most
misunderstood but powerful toolswe have in midlife to protect
our peace, create healthyrelationships, and step into our
reinvention with confidence.
So we're gonna touch onboundaries.
For many of us, boundaries soundscary.
(21:56):
We think of them as that willpush people away, cause
conflict, and make it seem thatmake us seem difficult.
But here's the truth (22:05):
boundaries aren't walls.
They're love notes to ourselves,they're how you honor your
needs, your values, and yourworth.
So, what are boundaries reallyand what they aren't?
Boundaries aren't aboutcontrolling other people.
That is not what they're about.
Um, how you can't make anyonebehave in a certain way.
(22:28):
Instead, boundaries are clearguidelines you set for yourself
what you will and won't allow inyour life.
Think of it like this (22:37):
a boundary is saying, here's how I
will respond if this happens.
It's not saying you must do thisor else.
That's not what a boundary is.
An example, um, you a manualcontrol.
You can't ever raise your voiceat me.
Um, that is a manual.
(22:58):
That is not healthy.
A boundary, which is a self-careum item, a practice, is if you
raise your voice, I will leavethe room.
That is a correct way, and thatis a boundary.
Do you see the difference?
You're not telling someone notto raise their voice.
You're saying if they raisetheir voice, I am going to leave
the room.
(23:19):
So you're not trying to controlthem, you're giving your
response.
And um, so that is what acorrect boundary is.
Uh, why we struggle withboundaries?
Many women um that I've spokento, um, especially in my
coaching training, uh, theystruggle to set and keep
boundaries.
(23:39):
And the reason why is they'reafraid of conflict.
We as women are usually afraidof conflict.
We don't want to hurt anyone'sfeelings.
We seriously hope people willjust know what we need.
We worry we'll lose therelationship if we speak our
truth.
But here's the catch (23:57):
when you don't set boundaries, resentment
builds up.
You end up frustrated, drained,and even angry because people
keep crossing invisible linesthat don't that they don't even
know exist.
So that is uh some of theboundaries.
(24:18):
Um boundaries are how you showpeople where your lines are.
Without them, intimacy suffers.
With them, relationships becomeclearer, healthier, and more
real.
So that's why boundaries are soimportant.
From a neuroscience perspectiveregarding boundaries, um, they
(24:38):
help regulate your nervoussystem.
When you're clear about whatyou'll tolerate, your brain
doesn't have to stay consistentin a fight or flight mode, um,
scanning for threats ordisappointments.
Boundaries give your brainpredictability and safety.
And when your nervous systemfeels safe, you have more
energy, focus, and creativityfor things you actually want in
(25:02):
midlife, whether that's wellnessstyle, relationships, or
rediscovering your passions.
Boundaries are healthy, even ina neuroscience perspective.
Um, the hard part is thefollowing through, right?
Here's where it gets tricky,tricky.
It's one thing to say, if you doX, I'll do Y.
(25:23):
It's another to actually followthrough.
This is where most of us getstuck.
We think, well, I don't want toupset them, or maybe they didn't
mean it.
And so we back down.
But when you don't followthrough, you teach yourself and
others that boundaries aren'treal.
That's when resentment, drama,and anger really starts bubbling
(25:44):
up.
So following through is an actof self-love.
It says, I matter, my peacematters, my truth matters.
So in truth, boundaries are anact of love.
The most powerful boundariescome not from anger, but from
love.
When you work through yourfeelings until you feel calm and
say, Here's my truth.
(26:04):
You set boundaries in a way thatinvites deeper connection.
Boundaries set with love soundlike I care about you, and this
is what I need to take care ofmyself.
I love our relationship too muchto stay quiet, too much to stay
quiet when I hurt, when I feelhurt.
This is what I will do to honormyself, these boundaries.
(26:27):
And yes, sometimes you have tobe willing to sacrifice the
relationship if boundaries areviolated repeatedly.
That's not selfish.
That is a sense of self-respect.
So those people who who who areyour triggers are actually your
teachers.
Ever notice how certain peoplepush all your buttons?
Those are often your greatestteachers.
(26:49):
Why?
Because they show you exactlywhere you need boundaries.
Instead of spiraling infrustration, you ask yourself,
what boundary would protect mypeace here?
What truth am I afraid to speak?
What am I tolerating that I nolonger want to tolerate?
Every time you set an honor aboundary, you grow in courage
(27:13):
and authenticity.
So here are some ways to flexthat boundary muscle or those
muscles.
This is a way to practice yourboundaries.
You can use a journal prompt,write down one area where you
feel resentment or frustration.
Ask yourself, what boundarywould release this?
You could practice saying it outloud in the mirror, rehearse
(27:35):
boundary statements calmly andlovingly as an example.
If you cancel last minute, Iwon't reschedule.
That is a boundary you couldpractice in the mirror.
You could do a boundary audit,list three situations where you
often feel drained.
What clear requests andconsequence can you create?
(27:56):
You can have a boundary buddy,share a boundary with a trusted
friend or family member who canlovingly hold you accountable.
And then you could do aself-compassion ritual every
time you follow through on aboundary, celebrate it with a
small act of love, a walk, ajournal entry, or a simple
acknowledgement of your courageto act.
(28:17):
So, as a closing, boundariesaren't about pushing people
away.
They're about drawing closer toyourself, your truth, your
values, your peace.
When you love yourself enough toset boundaries, you invite
others to love you moreauthentically too.
So this midlife is your seasonto awaken, to step into
reinvention and to stoptolerating anything that dims
(28:40):
your glow.
Boundaries of how you protectyour glow.
You don't have to shout, fight,or control.
You just have to stand in love,courage, and clarity.
That's when midlife becomes themost beautiful chapter in your
life.
So keep glowing and honor yourboundaries.
(29:01):
So that's it.
That's a wrap of episode 19 withthe Midlife Glow report report.
Um, I'm Jax, and I thank you forsticking along for this entire
episode.
If you did, um, if this episodespoke to you, I would be kind
enough to leave a review.
It helps other women like youfind this podcast.
(29:24):
Um, so if you'd be kindly toleave a review, you can find me
on social media at jax styles, JA X S T Y S on Instagram, uh,
Facebook, uh, TikTok, threads,uh, even Pinterest, which I'm
starting to create new boards.
Um, so you can find me on if youhave questions or suggestions of
(29:47):
what I should cover orquestions, you could DM me.
Um, you could text me throughthis podcast as well.
So check out the show notes.
I thank you for listening.
I thank you for your time.
I hope you have an amazing weekahead.
And I will check in next week.
Thanks again.
Love Jax.
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