238. Limiting Beliefs vs Capability

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Have you ever told yourself "I can't do this" based solely on past failures? That moment when your mind convinces you something is impossible despite how much stronger, smarter, or more capable you've become?

During a recent Strive Elite workout, I witnessed a member reach her breaking point while attempting an exercise she believed was beyond her capabilities. Tears welled up as she repeatedly told herself she couldn't do it. What followed was a powerful lesson about how our limiting beliefs—often based on outdated experiences—can create artificial barriers to our potential.

The breakthrough came from a simple pattern interrupt: standing up, taking a breath, and listening with fresh perspective. After resetting her mindset, this member not only completed the exercise but performed three full sets. The limitation existed solely in her mind, not her physical capabilities.

Sometimes we need to borrow belief from others who see potential in us that we don't yet recognize. As a coach, I frequently tell my clients: "I'm not going to ask you to do anything I don't believe you can do." This external confidence can bridge the gap between self-doubt and self-belief until you prove it to yourself through action.

This principle applies universally. My entrepreneurial journey includes what I call my "graveyard of businesses"—failed ventures that could have reinforced the belief that success wasn't possible. Instead, I maintained that success was inevitable; it wasn't a question of if, but when. Strive 11 emerged after five years of ups and downs, demonstrating that persistence eventually overcomes temporary failure.

Whatever goal you're pursuing, remember that your past performance is not your permanent truth. Set mini-milestones, celebrate small wins, and be willing to step back up to the plate and swing again. Your breakthrough is waiting on the other side of that limiting belief.

Have you been holding yourself back based on outdated beliefs about your capabilities? Share your experience or ask questions in the comments—I read every one!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Yeah, it's mindset cafe.
Today's give me another soloepisode.
I want to talk about somethingthat happened this past weekend
During one of our our striveelite workouts.
Right, the elite workouts arefor members that are doing the

(00:37):
elite challenge.
It's a level week challenge,but Something happened.
It made me realize that, youknow, this is more common than
not in my experience as apersonal trainer, and it was
something I felt that wasimportant, because we all go
through this at some point right, in one shape form or another,

(00:58):
and that is the fact that justbecause you couldn't do
something at a certain pointdoesn't mean you can't do it now
.
Right, you're working at things, you're getting better, you're
getting stronger, right, and soyour next attempt at it, you
have that limiting belief fromyour previous experience with it

(01:19):
that may hold you back, right?
So this all stemmed from aconversation I had with a member
.
She was doing an exercise andshe was getting really
frustrated with herself becauseshe was telling herself that she
can't do it Right.
I told her to do an exerciseand I saw a tear starting to

(01:40):
come up and I was like you cando it, you know.
Push through, let's go.
And she gave it one moreattempt, you know, not even a
full, really attempt to kind ofjust put her feet on the thing
and, you know, just let herknees hit the ground and she
already was defeated in her ownmind.
Right, she was going to doeverything that she could to

(02:00):
make it a, to make it true thatshe couldn't do it, because
that's what she believed.
And so I told her to stand up,right, and if you guys don't
know from, you know thesepodcast episodes, I'm not a
super rah, rah, you know, cuddlykind of you know person or
trainer, or motivator, leader oranything like that.

(02:21):
And so I told her to stand upand I was like, look, at the end
of the day, I'm not going tomake you do anything that you I
don't believe you can do, right,because that does no good for
anyone.
Right, the things I'm going tohave you do, I believe you can
do them.
Right, with my whole heart.
Right, whether you're able todo it or not, it really dictates

(02:45):
your effort put towards it.
And she was like I can't do this.
And I was like, yes, you can,right, I just saw you do a few
reps of it.
You're telling yourself causeyou can't do it, because you
weren't able to do in the past.
But how long ago was that Right?
Just because we couldn't dosomething at a certain point

(03:06):
doesn't mean you can't do it now.
Like, think about how muchstronger you've gotten, think
about how much you put in andhow much your body has changed.
You're not the same person thatattempted it back then, but
you're telling yourself youcan't do it because you weren't
able to do it then.
Right, I was like, just becauseyou can't go at the same speed

(03:28):
or finish as fast, as you know,the next person that doesn't
matter, it is you versus you.
Always in life.
Right, yes, competition is goodand and so forth.
Like, don't be wrong, differenttopic but in the terms of
personal growth and personaldevelopment, like it is you
versus you.
So the past event of you notachieving it is holding you back

(03:52):
from achieving it now.
Right, you can.
You can tear up, you can cry orwhatever.
You're going to do thisexercise.
I know you can do it.
I'm going to push you Right,and that's what I want to kind
of talk about today is, you know, sometimes we have to have that
breakthrough moment, right, andfor this event that I'm

(04:15):
referring to, the breakthroughmoment was almost her standing
up, right, that it gets her outof the current physical position
that she's in and it takes heraway from the situation for a
second, which allows me to getthe same message I was, you know
, conveying to her while she wasdown in the plank and trying to

(04:36):
do the the ab exercise.
So she stood up.
Basically it's almost like areset and then having her take a
breath and listen to what I'msaying, right, allows it to sink
in.
So sometimes we need thatbreakthrough moment which is
just stepping away for a secondright.
Go for a little walk, right,you know, change tasks for a

(04:57):
second right.
Get your mind off for a splitsecond.
Then you can start to breakdown that limiting belief and
come back to it Right.
The other thing is, sometimesyou have a coach, you have a
mentor, you have a family member, a spouse, whatever the case
may be who believes in you morethan you believe in yourself.

(05:19):
Right, and I can say that'seven true for me in business.
Right, fitness, the whole thing.
Right, sometimes you have toborrow their belief in you until
you prove to yourself that youcan do it, and then you have
your own self-belief right whensomeone else is telling you that

(05:41):
they believe you can do it,they might see something that
you don't see, and you'reletting emotions become data,
and that's not how it works.
Emotions are emotions right.
Facts are facts.
That's not how it works.
Emotions are emotions right,facts are facts.
So the fact of the matter isyour body has changed.
Your emotion is telling youthat I can't do it because I

(06:02):
wasn't able to do it once.
Okay, well, let's take thatthought process.
You know and go.
You know, to the extreme.
As a baby, you weren't able towalk until you were right, and
then you weren't able to rununtil you were right.
Now, think about you know,growing up, you didn't know how

(06:26):
to drive until you did.
It's a skill that you builtright.
So that same thing applies toanything in life.
Though, just because youcouldn't lift a certain weight

(06:46):
today doesn't mean in a year,after training for a year, that
you won't be able to lift thatsame weight.
No-transcript.
So I think that it's just ahuge thing that you know.

(07:10):
A lot of us experience, you know, even for myself.
You know I'll shift gears fromfitness right from business.
I have a graveyard ofbusinesses that didn't work
right.
That's just the name of thegame of an entrepreneur, of
being an entrepreneur, right,you, you try something.
It doesn't work.
And you know they say you can'tfail if you don't give up.
Well, sometimes it's not givingup, it's pivoting, right.
And some things, some events,even before Strive 11 was built,

(07:32):
happened right With failedbusiness partners, with, you
know, failed investors and soforth.
Each of those events could havestopped me, and let me set in
my own mind and be like wow,this, you know it's not going to
work.
Like the next person is goingto say the same thing, like it's
.
This is not for me.
I can't do this.

(07:53):
Or you just try again.
Right, you can't hit a home runIf you don't step back up to
the plate.
You strike out the first time,but it doesn't mean you're going
to strike out every time youstep up to the plate and you
swing.
You don't give it a half ass,swing and be like I'm going to

(08:14):
strike out anyways, and justkind of half-ass.
Well then, you're aligningyourself to strike out.
Right, If you've already toldyourself you're going to strike
out, you're going to try toprove to yourself that that's
what's going to happen, right?
How many times have we done thator have you done that right?
You tell yourself you knowsomething's not going to work

(08:36):
and then, looking back on it,there was things you probably
could have done, or you know youdid that made it so that it
didn't work, when, if you wouldhave changed something or had a
conversation with someone, itprobably would have had a
different outcome.
Cause I know I'm guilty of thatas well.
Whether it's you're frustratedwith something, whether you're
just skeptical about it,whatever the case may be, we

(09:00):
start to prove to ourselves thatwe're right in whatever we say.
If you believe you can achievesomething, then you can.
Maybe not today, maybe nottomorrow, but it will happen.
That's why one of my favoritesayings is it's not a matter of
if, it's just a matter of when.
I always knew I was going toopen a gym and always knew I was
going to open a business.

(09:21):
It wasn't a matter of if it wasjust a matter of when.
I mean, strive 11, before itwas built, was five years of ups
and downs.
If you are dead set on achievinga goal, like I talked in the
last episode, regardless of howyou feel, you do it anyways

(09:45):
right.
You have to put in so much workand try so many times that it
is undeniable it is inevitablefor you to achieve success on
whatever you're trying toachieve.
That's just how life works.
Very rare, it's very rare whensomething works first time.

(10:06):
Does it happen?
Yeah, but it's trial and errorwith everything in life.
It's trial and error witheverything in life.
So, if you have tried toaccomplish a goal, whether it's
this, even we're almost donewith the year right, did you
accomplish your new year'sresolution this year?
Think about that.
January came around I know thetime this year has flown by, for

(10:28):
me at least.
January came.
You had new year's resolutions.
Did you accomplish them?
Were your new year'sresolutions the same as last
year?
What are your New Year'sresolutions going to be next
year?
Are they going to be the sameas this year?
Just because you didn'taccomplish it last year doesn't
mean you can't accomplish itthis year, right?

(10:49):
And if it was something that isalready you know you were
supposed to do something for theyear long, well, it doesn't
mean you can't accomplish itnext year.
But you have to have thatmindset of I am going to
accomplish this right and thatis, without a doubt, the number
one reframe that you need tohave.
Your past performance is not apermanent truth.
Your past performance is thatpast.

(11:12):
It's in the rear view mirror,it's your past performance, it's
not your current performance.
You can always change what'shappening.
Right, this second right.
So realize that.
You know you may not be able todo it as well as someone else or
as fast as someone else or asgood as someone else, but it
takes time and through therepetitions of whether it's

(11:35):
lifting, whether it's business,whether it's whatever the case
may be, it takes time to buildthat skill.
It takes time to build thatstrength.
It takes discipline for you todo what you need to do so that
you get to the level you want toget to.
And I mean, I think that evenwith those with that point, you

(11:58):
need to almost set minimilestones within it.
Like you couldn't for example,this member couldn't do an
exercise.
Then her achieving one rep ofit is a mini milestone.
Then achieving more than onerep let's say five reps that's a
mini milestones, right.
So those mini milestones wereskipped with her and she went

(12:19):
from not being able to do it tobeing able to do three sets of
20, right.
Once we got that mindset kind ofreset.
It was three sets of 20.
Oh, my goodness, I could do it.
Was it easy?
No, did you struggle?
Yes, but did she do it?
Yes, right.
So it's those mini milestonesand those micro wins that allow

(12:39):
you to start building thatself-confidence so you can try
again and improve your, yourpast performance.
So I hope that helps you knowwith with something that you may
have going on in your life,whether it's a goal, whether
it's something that you've triedin the past and you're scared
to try again.
But realize that again, yourpast performance is not a

(13:01):
permanent truth.
You can turn something that youweren't able to achieve in the
past into something that is anotch on the belt of your
successes.
You just have to be willing tostep back up to that plate and
swing.
But with that being said, guys,I love you, guys, I appreciate
you.
Make sure you guys share thisepisode with a friend and leave

(13:24):
a review.
It really does help spread theword.
But if you guys need anything,you can always message me, DM me
on Instagram, the Mindset Cafeor even mine, devin Gonzalez.
But with that, guys, Iappreciate all you guys Love you
all.
See you on the next one.

(13:48):
Can't be distracted.
I stay on my mind no time to beslackin.
I hustle harder.
I go against the current cause.
I know my mind is rich to becollected.