144. Are You Fueling Your Child’s Anxiety?

What if the most powerful way to help your anxious child isn’t to fix them—but to change you? In this episode of the OCD Whisperer podcast, host Kristina Orlova welcomes licensed therapist and anxiety expert Robyn Isman to discuss the SPACE protocol (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions). Robyn, certified in SPACE, explains how this evidence-based approach helps reduce childhood anxiety by focusing solely on parents' behaviors rather than direct child intervention. She breaks down the SPACE framework, emphasizing how parental accommodations—such as avoiding triggers or providing excessive reassurance—unintentionally reinforce anxiety cycles.

 

Robyn highlights key steps in SPACE, including educating parents about anxiety as an interpersonal dynamic, identifying accommodations, and creating targeted plans to reduce them. She stresses the importance of "supportive language," which validates a child's fears while expressing confidence in their ability to cope. The conversation also tackles common challenges, such as managing meltdowns during the process and reframing accommodation reduction as an act of love. Robyn shares inspiring success stories and teases her upcoming membership program for parents seeking guidance.

 

Listeners will gain practical insights into fostering resilience in anxious children by stepping back—with compassion—to let them grow..

 

The 3 things you’ll learn in  today’s episode:

• Why reducing accommodations—not increasing them—is key to helping your anxious child.
• How to shift from "fixing your kid" to examining your own role in the anxiety cycle.
• Actionable tools from the SPACE method: mapping accommodations, supportive language, stress testing, and more.

 

In This Episode

• [00:00] Introduction and free OCD resources
• [00:45] Meet Robyn Iseman, SPACE-certified therapist
• [01:10] What is the SPACE method and how does it work?
• [02:20] Understanding anxiety as interpersonal
• [04:30] Parental accommodations: what they are and why they matter
• [07:50] Mapping accommodations and setting target behaviors
• [10:20] How to handle meltdowns and anger using SPACE
• [14:00] Emotional regulation—for parents
• [17:50] How to respond when your child gets upset
• [20:30] Supportive language and delayed response techniques
• [23:30] Creating distance from anxiety through externalization
• [25:50] Addressing safety, stress-testing, and tapping out as parents
• [28:45] The power of the “announcement” and doing this with love
• [33:00] Real-life results: How SPACE transforms family dynamics
• [35:11] Robyn’s upcoming membership and where to find her

Our Guest

Robyn Isman is a licensed therapist and anxiety expert certified in the SPACE method, with over a decade of experience working with children, teens, and families. Through her private practice and upcoming membership platform, Robyn equips parents with tools to confidently support their anxious children—without reinforcing the anxiety itself. She offers education, strategy, and compassion in equal measure.

 

Resources & Links

 

Kristina Orlova, LMFT

• Instagram
•  YouTube
•  OCD CBT Journal Tracker and Planner
•  Website

 

Robyn Isman 

• Website
• LinkedIn
• Instagram
• Facebook
• Parenting The Anxious Child Membership

Please note, while our host is a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in OCD and anxiety disorders in the state of California, this