Should the United States Take Over Greenland?

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Anxious to display their recently acquired knowledge about all things Greenland, Adam and Jeff address whether the United States should take over Greenland and the means by which it should do so. They talk about the fact that Greenland is heavily subsidized by Denmark and that if the United States should take it over, it will inherit that same open-ended obligation to keep the Greenlandic economy, afloat for years and years to come. They also talk about past efforts by the United States to buy Greenland outright from Denmark for cash. However, Jeff points out that this approach (which has been rejected repeatedly by Denmark) does not have any appeal to the Greenlanders themselves because the money would be going to the Danish government.. Adam and Jeff discuss a more innovative approach whereby the United States would bribe every man, woman and child in Greenland with large sums of cash to persuade them to switch sides and  join the United States.  They even offer to oversee the money transfers in person by taking trunks full of cash to the various Greenlandic settlements and obtaining proxy votes in favor of joining the United States.