August 2, 2025 • 52 mins
Have you ever wondered what those first tentative messages that spark a lifelong connection actually look like? In this deeply personal episode, we pull back the curtain on our relationship's origin story as we celebrate a decade together.
The year was 2015. A chance nightclub sighting at the Town Crier in Tri-Cities, Washington. A determined Facebook message the morning after. And just like that, our journey began. What makes this episode special is that we actually read our original Facebook messages from August 2, 2015—preserved exactly as they were written. You'll hear our authentic first impressions, the careful dance of getting to know someone new, and those moments of vulnerability that laid the foundation for everything that followed.
We go beyond just telling our "how we met" story to explore what's kept us together through ten years of growth, challenges, and change. From breaking down gender role expectations (yes, he does laundry and cooks!) to the years-long process of learning to communicate effectively with each other, we share the raw truth about building a partnership that works. As Tino reveals his journey to better emotional awareness through journaling, and Erika considers therapy for her communication challenges, we discuss how creating safe spaces for vulnerability has strengthened our bond.
Whether you're single, newly dating, or decades into a partnership, this conversation offers honest insights about what it means to truly grow together. Because sometimes the path to a solid relationship isn't finding someone perfect—it's finding someone willing to work through the imperfections alongside you. Have a question about relationships or a topic for a future episode? Drop it in the comments below and don't forget to subscribe to join us on this journey.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
hi guys hola been a minute since we've been back
tell them where you've been I'vejust been busy with life and
then now I'm sick, so I'mactually not that great today,
but I showed up you're gonnawant me to touch my mic, so let
me touch my mic, right now.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
So the challenge for today's podcast is going to be,
first of all, no touching of themic my gosh.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Okay, where's the love?
Speaker 1 (00:36):
where's the?
Speaker 2 (00:37):
love.
Anyways, since she ain't bringus in, right, allow me.
This is the other half podcast.
I'm your boy, tino.
You feel me big?
Tino, that's what they call mein the streets.
This is, um.
Who are you?
Erica okay, erica, what ledge?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
okay period the boss you tell them, girl, you tell
them anyways, all right, so youcan say what our video is going
to be for today um, first of all, we're going to start with our
icebreakers.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I don't know why erica's trying to jump the gun
and rush me into something I'mnot ready for, but that's why I
don't start it, because you tryto correct me all the time
anyways, all right.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
So I so well I pulled a few just because they're
going to be kind of part of ourrelationship in our podcast
today.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Part of our topic.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Yeah, and then they're also going to be.
I can't think of the word, butit's like it keeps the
conversation going.
Okay, well, the first one ispretty much our podcast today.
Hold on, let me get it.
Let me get it right.
Tell a story.
How did you and your partnermeet?
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Are you serious?
I look Erica's stressing me outtoday I see what's going on
here, you don't want to do thatone.
It says tell a story about howyou and your partner met.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
I told her before this, our topic for today was
how we met.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
Hey, how you going to pull a card.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Okay, fine, alright, okay, this is the one that's
already the topic.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Okay, so the first one that I found.
It says what is something yourpartner wants you to be more
thoughtful about?
Speaker 2 (02:20):
What?
Why did you pick this card?
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Because I already know there's something.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
You got something on your mind?
No, I was thinking that youwould have something on your
mind?
Speaker 1 (02:31):
What?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
More thoughtful about .
I don't know If I had to say Idon't know right now.
I need a couple seconds tothink about that because I gotta
get in my bag what's somethingthat you always tell me.
I tell you a lot that I couldwork on you know what's
(02:56):
something you could work on.
You could smile a little more.
Sometimes you come in the houseand you just be very
unapproachable, like you're justabout to beat the skin off one
of us how, okay, wait, how,almost 10 years in, you want to
(03:17):
tell me I should smile more.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
You sound like everybody else.
I don't know you right now.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Do it.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
That is my biggest pet peeve.
I don't understand why my facebothers other people.
I'm not Okay.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
Okay, if you wake up in the morning or you come home
from work and I say, hey, how'sit going?
And you say, good, you see howthat sounds Like.
Don't bother me.
I'm not in the mood for thisright now.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I probably don't want to be bothered, okay.
That's the one thing.
What did you think You've beenmaking me look bad?
People are already roasting meall the dang time.
What did you think the onething would be?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
What did you think the one thing would be?
Speaker 1 (04:06):
More affectionate.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
I already tell you that enough.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
I know.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
I need to do something different.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Anyways, it's fine, you guys, we just let you enter
our whole relationship.
It's cool.
No, I don't know.
Anyways, I don't know somethingthat hold on, let me think.
Actually, actually, you'rewhere you're actually doing
better at it.
I think it's just being likethoughtful for me with you, like
(04:40):
you're pretty much alreadyperfect it, it's fine.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
But don't lie.
I want to hear what you sayabout me.
When you at work, are youtalking to your friends?
Y'all talking trash about y'allmen.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
I do not talk trash, okay, is that what y'all do in
the shop?
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Of course, Well, that's really rude.
I'm just playing Dang.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
I would say this is going to go into another
question, though, too.
So I feel like I always this ismy biggest thing Cause food.
I don't know about you women,but food is the way to my heart.
It really is.
I'm like the man.
I feel like I always make surethat he is fed.
I feed everybody before me, Imake sure he ate.
(05:25):
You know what I mean.
So we don't have gender roles.
So he does cook food for mesometimes, when he knows I'm
gonna have a long day and I comehome and eat.
But sometimes he doesn't.
Okay, and sometimes he wants tocook, cook, but then he'll cook
(05:47):
and it's like 10 o'clock atnight and I literally said to
him I want to try to eat before8 pm because you know I probably
need to.
No, he still sometimes waits.
What's a man do when he getshome?
He gets on the game.
Right, sure you know.
Home, he gets on the game rightSure do.
You know they don't stay on thegame for an hour or two.
(06:08):
They're on the game for atleast five, six hours.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
And this man gets home early, he's on that game
for about eight hours.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Why are you lying?
Because he started cooking.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Erica, do you know the math of eight?
Speaker 1 (06:18):
hours, don't forget.
We have a ring camera.
I can see when you get home.
If I get home at 6, 8 hours.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It's 2 am.
I be asleep by 2 am.
That is a lie.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Sometimes you're not in bed till 1 after the game.
That's still not, I don't evencare that he plays the game I'm
just saying 6 hours.
If you say you're going to makefood make it in time.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Be thoughtful, because I always make that you
eat at a right at a good time.
Okay, that's it all.
Right, let me tell my story.
Let me tell my side.
Right, I gotta eat late.
I'm gonna tell you why, why youthink I gotta eat late, doesn't
matter I gotta eat late becauseif it's a certain time and I'm
hungry again, I don't want tofeel hungry again.
All right, if I eat too early, Iget hungry by the end of the
night, then I wake again.
I don't want to feel hungryagain.
All right, if I eat too early,I get hungry by the end of the
(07:08):
night, then I wake up and Idon't always eat in the morning
and I'm hungry again.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
I understand that, but that's about you See.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Oh, you got to put your hand in my face.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
You're thinking about you again, all right, so that
was the first one, so Can'tbelieve this dog.
What's today's video about?
Go ahead?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Today's video since she ruined the mood is about the
first time we met.
All right, so we're going totell the story of the first time
we met.
I'm going to let you tell itwhy.
Because I feel like you justknow everything.
(07:52):
I just want to know yourperspective.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Well, I mean the first time we met or the first
time we saw each other, becauseI don't feel like we had a first
time.
I mean actually yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
First time we saw each other.
And then we met later, ofcourse, but you know, first time
, first time you laid eyes onthe big fella.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
First time I met Avery was I had been single for
six months.
My friends dragged me out toTown Crier Shout out to Town
Crier in Tri-Cities, washington.
I did not want to go I'm not aclubber and anyway so I was
sitting there.
And then of course, I know hisbrother, cedric.
So obviously, if I see Cedric,cedric was somebody that all my
(08:39):
friends knew.
He was a pretty popular guy,and then this guy was standing
next to him.
I think even like what rome,derome or whatever his name was
there there's a couple of theirfriends, yeah so it was kind of
one of those things where, like,I saw him, but honestly I
wasn't looking, I didn't reallypay attention and she seen me.
You're that yeah, because I sawhis brother and I was never
(09:02):
ever interested in in hisbrother like everybody else, so
kind of like one of those Lookturn, that's funny.
And then what happened?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
What happened, Erica?
Speaker 1 (09:16):
No.
What's your version of when youno?
Speaker 2 (09:19):
you got to tell the rest, you got to tell your story
.
So then I can double back.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
OK, so well then after that.
So we left early.
I don't remember why.
I think we just rest.
You got to tell your story, sothen I can double back.
Okay, so well then after that.
So we left early.
I don't remember why, I thinkwe just wanted to leave.
We left early.
Um, next morning I get amessage on facebook from avery
and basically he was, you know,trying to talk to me and at
first I was like who's this guy?
I honestly didn't know who youwere.
(09:43):
At first I was like who's thisguy?
I honestly didn't know who youwere.
At first I didn't piece the twotogether that you were the guy
standing next to your brother.
Then I looked at his Facebookpage.
Obviously I realized he hadmutual friends with my friends.
And then his brother, and thenwe ended up meeting back at the
(10:04):
same place, I remember, becauseyou were wearing a red long
sleeve kind of hoodie shirt andthen we just, yeah, we met there
and we hung out with one of myother friends and just started
talking and then we starteddating all right, I'm gonna say
this erica, don't got no friends, no more so old friends.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
You know what I'm saying.
You know she had some friendsthat didn't like that she was
dating me.
Yeah, I said, girl, you bettercut them off I don't have those
friends anymore I ain't tellingher to cut them off, but no, he
didn't, it'd be like that.
All right, this is what happened.
Right, I'm out with my brotheroutside, outside, like like a
(10:44):
little ratchet, you know, I'msaying out in these streets and
uh, I had just moved towashington like a couple months
before, right, I moved towashington in april.
The day I seen erica was august1st, see, I remember like it
was yesterday.
So I seen her august 1st it was.
(11:08):
Uh, was that a saturday, Ithink?
Yep, sound about right, soundabout right then.
Um, so we went out.
I was like who is?
that my brother got this lamefriend.
He's a a clown.
All right, I'll tell you rightnow.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Clown, he's a fan actually.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
So I'll tell him hey, who is that?
Like you know her?
No, but I'm going to go talk toher.
What?
All right, he goes, talks toher, gets shut down.
Cool, I'm like, well, youruined that for me.
So then I'm like, well, youruined that for me.
So then I'm trying to build upmy confidence to go holler,
right, I'll turn around, shegone.
(11:50):
But the first time I seen herit was like God was like hey, my
boy, this for you, my boy, youfeel me, I got you.
I was like, for sure, you feelme.
Who am I to be disobedient?
Come on now, come on now.
So yeah, you know, so, she wasgone I was like dang.
But I knew who she was withbecause my brother introduced me
(12:12):
to one of her friends thecouple weeks before.
So I went to her friend'sFacebook profile you know I was
a Facebook detective, you feelme Went to her friend's profile
I said that's her right there,click Add a friend Message.
Come on, man.
That was the next day.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
I was talking to her the whole day.
You feel me Dang.
You remember a lot.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
I asked her for her number when I was.
What's that?
It's a highway.
George Washington Way turnedinto a highway to go by the mall
.
I was right there, past theexit of the mall, when she gave
me her number.
Come on, dog Dang.
Come on, dog, come on.
You know what I said to her.
Hold on, let me pull up themessage.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
You still have it.
You're lying, you're lying.
You literally still have ourmessages from.
That's crazy.
I'm gonna tell you what I said.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
I said, hey, I don't know you, but I think you're
gorgeous.
I was going to speak to you,but when I saw you last night my
friend got into a littlealtercation and when I looked up
you were gone.
I just want to know if I canget to know you what?
Speaker 1 (13:26):
What did I?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
say what did the young people say, riz?
What did the young people sayRiz?
Speaker 1 (13:30):
What did I say back?
Speaker 2 (13:32):
This is what she said back Hello, dot dot dot.
Lol, yeah, I think I rememberseeing you a few times.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Were you standing by, said and thank you, smiling
face times were you standing bysaid and thank you, smiling face
girl, you better quit it.
That's crazy.
I cannot how did you not tellme you had those this whole time
?
You're so annoying.
I never knew that you had thosemessages.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah I say, yeah, that's my brother, she's there.
Oh, I see.
Okay, cool, cool.
You want to read the rest?
Speaker 1 (14:09):
Yeah, here read the rest.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
That is so wild.
That's how you slide on a youngtenderoni that's older than you
.
You feel me?
Fellas, take notes, all right.
Guy, take notes, all right.
I don't hear nothing.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
I don't hear nothing, okay, okay okay, I said well, I
just moved back home, which isback to Washington.
I said I was raised here, wentto school here, family and
friends here.
I'm not really a club person.
See, I've always been true tomyself.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
See, and I knew it because she wasn't really
drinking and I don't reallydrink.
When I go out, I don't drink atall.
I don't know why I said when Igo out I don't drink.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
So yeah, I've never been drunk in my life yeah, and
I've never been the fun friendbecause I just I don't like
clubs, I don't dance, I don'treally like to drink, so I mean
I have drink, but I don't like,like drink like that.
So then I said um, but I likehaving fun with my friends and I
hang at bars and I'll hang atbars.
(15:12):
The one, what, like that one, Iguess.
Um, I'm pretty chill, laid back, you won't really hear much
about me or see me out often,cause, honestly, like yeah, I
just I was already in arelationship previously and like
just in that one in arelationship previously and like
just in that one, so I wasn'taround, like that, and then he
goes it seems like he knowseverybody out here, which he did
(15:35):
, yeah, and then you said wheredid I move from?
And you, you said yeah, Ifigure that honestly, that's why
I messaged you.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
Hey, mind you, this is the morning after.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
This is so weird.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Keep reading.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
Keep reading.
You want me to read the wholething.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Oh my God, Do you want?
Speaker 2 (15:59):
me to say his name.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Who?
I already said his name.
So then I said ha ha, yeah, Idon't know, said like that, but
I've heard of him because,honestly, I didn't know cedric
like that at all, I just knewabout him.
I said I moved from kansas andthen he made a little face and
said you heard good things orbad things as uh.
He said why did you move here?
(16:21):
And yeah, I moved here threemonths ago.
I'm from iowa.
My brother convinced me to movehere.
I said, honestly, I just know hedoes music or something because
I can sing and that a lot offemales want him, not including
me, lol I repeat not I put in otshe tried to make that like a
big thing because, becauseeverybody did, lol, I moved here
(16:47):
because my relationship of fouryears didn't work out, so I
decided to move back home, here,where my support was.
I said, oh, lol, yeah,tri-cities is pretty lame
compared to other places, butthat's because I'm a busy city
woman.
See, I'm still the same.
And then you just say, yeah,I'm aware of that.
Four years is a pretty longtime.
It's not that bad.
It's definitely nothing likewhere I'm from, but it's not
(17:07):
that bad, which you are so rightabout.
Then he asked me the bigquestion how old am I?
I said yeah, it's not bad.
If you're a real chill person,then you'll be fine.
I said this is 2015.
Yeah, no way.
(17:29):
Yeah, you know it.
What do you mean?
I said I'll be 27 in october.
I'm old, I know.
He said it's all right, you'renot that old.
Everybody is older than me outhere, though, I turned 23 this
month I was 22 mackins.
I don't keep going, you want meto read all my business, yeah
read it.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
Yeah, oh my god, yeah , take notes so then I said oh,
oh then he asked me the otherquestion.
Speaker 1 (17:51):
He said do you have kids?
Speaker 2 (17:54):
and is that a?
Speaker 1 (17:54):
good or a bad one.
You're always trying to like,read, like, get in my, my head
what do you mean?
Speaker 2 (18:01):
because you're like, is that a?
Speaker 1 (18:01):
good one or a bad one .
Is that a good one or a bad one?
Is that?
Speaker 2 (18:04):
a good thing or a bad thing.
We're trying to figure out ifyou're interested or if you're
not.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
I really I don't know .
Then I said yes, and that'susually what I tell guys that
want to get to know me, to scarethem away, even though I'm not
lying.
Lol.
I have five kids.
I said I was married for sixyears, right out of high school,
and I had three kids with mymarriage.
Then, when I was 23, I gotdivorced and I took my three
(18:30):
kids and he took my three kidsfrom me and they live in arizona
.
So now I only have my two kidsfrom my four-year relationship,
which was right after my firstrelationship out of high school
I said so no, they don't allhave different baby daddies,
just two different relationshipsusually works to scare most men
away, though.
So that's good, lol.
(18:51):
And said I've been in long-termrelationships, as you can see,
and that was a good all.
Like you, I don't know.
Oh, like you're young, yeah.
He laughed at me and he saidyou're terrible.
That's so bogus.
(19:11):
Hopefully you weren't trying toscare me away.
Well, I don't have any kids.
I have a lot of siblings andnieces and a nephew, but I want
children someday.
Do you ever see your other kids?
Then I said, lol, well, itworks with the ones I want.
That I don't want to talk to me?
Ha ha.
I just don't think a lot of mencan handle me or my life anyway
(19:34):
, so why not scare them away?
Which is so true.
She thought I couldn't handleher Facts Then I said, oh well,
that's nice, Family iseverything.
Smiley face yes, I just hadthem for the summer and now they
went back for school.
Then what was this?
You didn't respond to me tillthe next day.
That was august.
(19:59):
Second no same day dang yeahwhat I say then you said why do
you think you're hard to handle?
I agree I miss my family a lot.
Oh, that's good.
This is embarrassing.
I said because I'm dramatic,sensitive and feisty Hasn't
(20:21):
changed, huh, I have a lot ofresponsibilities and kids, so I
usually say you couldn't handlethis anyways, and it has done
well for now.
Yeah, because I was single forsix months and a lot of people
back home that heard I wassingle were trying to date me.
It was ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
And you come for the.
You fall for the new kid on theblock.
Come on.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Crazy, come on.
Well, I think I can handle you.
He says I said SMH.
He said don't doubt me, do youdrink or smoke?
Look, I'm trying to see.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
I said that's what they all say.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
I said I don't smoke, I drink socially which is true.
He said, wow, just put me witheverybody else.
Thanks, SMH.
And what do you mean socially?
Speaker 2 (21:09):
I do remember you asking me that.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
Like I would just drink when I want to with my
friends.
You want me to keep readingthis.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Is that right?
Speaker 1 (21:24):
You need to send this to me.
Anyway, we're not going to keepreading, but that's how we
started talking, and then we didthat till when?
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Dang, I was macking boy.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Honestly, you really weren't.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I said what you got planned for today?
Just working chilling.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
Same thing I still do we just having conversations.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
I live far.
Oh, yeah, for now till I buy acar.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
Which I did.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Yep, she did.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
I live 30 minutes away from him.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
We both didn't have a car.
We was brokey broke.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
When we first met I lived in, so everybody that
knows Tri-Cities.
I lived in Clonnell, Smalllittle town, one little road.
Speaker 2 (22:07):
Erica was trying to push me away.
She said so.
How many females did youmessage this morning after last
night?
Speaker 1 (22:11):
X.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
And what did I say?
Speaker 1 (22:18):
The only reason I messaged you is because I
thought I wouldn't.
I said oh, that's.
You said oh, that's not too bad.
And I only messaged one personthis morning.
Smartass, that's rude.
Then what did you say?
I said LMAO you said, the onlyreason I messaged you is because
I thought I wouldn't see youagain and that's a problem.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
Come on gang come on gang.
Is that the right one?
Good job, I thought I wouldn'tsee you again, and that's a
problem.
Come on gang, come on gang.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
Is that the right one ?
Good job, come on Good job,that was so sweet.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
She said, that was so sweet, you know.
Anyways, that's how we met guysI said if you didn't want to
talk to me, you would havestopped talking to me earlier,
shake my hand yeah and so then,what?
(23:14):
I said uh dang.
I said uh dang, she saidsomething about you.
I, like other guys, didn't geta reply.
I said other guys, sound likeeverybody wants you.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Yeah, I'm not going to you know you said they can
want what.
Yeah, I'm not going to you know, you said they can want what
they want.
Blow my bubble, but that's asmall city.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
But hey, I'm about to go, so text me.
Come on, man.
She could have just keptmessaging me, but I said I'm
about to go.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
So text me.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Yeah, I remember.
I remember texting you on myway to work and you said OK, I
guess.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
I'm about to go, so text me.
Yeah, I remember that's clever.
I remember texting you On myway to work.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
And you said Okay, I guess I'll save your number.
Text me.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Anyways yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
I am at work now.
Come on, man.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
Oh dang, yeah, see, I was at work.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
I said you doing too much, so I'll text you If I got
some spare time.
Go on, you don't want to seemToo thirsty, fellas, you don't
want to seem Too thirsty.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
I do remember you Saying that too, and I was like
Mmm, I know you're tripping.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
She said ha ha ha.
Spare time, okay, she said.
I said I'm just playing, I'mgoing gonna text you, but have a
good day at work, miss lady.
She said thanks, same to you.
Yeah, she said same to you herewe are that was 10 years ago,
(24:52):
right 10 years ago, um on august2nd 2015 2015.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
That's crazy A decade .
How do you feel you?
Speaker 2 (25:01):
didn't think I had the receipts, huh.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
No, I did not.
Yeah, don't play with me.
You're very good at keepingthings on the low.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Yeah, I don't play that.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
I don't even have those.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Dang.
So how's the last 10 years beenfor you?
Speaker 1 (25:16):
Honestly, I think we're at a good place.
It's been like you know, justups and downs, a lot of learning
, growing.
I just talked about this onfacebook decade in, you
definitely grow when you want togrow together, you definitely
learn each other's ways.
Um, I don't know.
(25:38):
I just feel like we've beenvery, very transparent and open
on here and you guys are likesuper open to listening and, you
know, sometimes leaving yourfeedback, having your own
assumptions and stuff.
So that's why we like to talkabout things.
But honestly, I feel like we'reprobably at the best place
we've ever been in ourrelationship and it's that I
can't even believe it's been 10years.
Literally, that's crazy.
Honestly, I feel like we'reprobably at the best place we've
(25:59):
ever been in our relationshipand it's that I can't even
believe it's been 10 years.
Literally, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
Yeah, you can know my boy.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
I know what do you feel like you've learned
throughout the what advice canyou get?
Cause I feel like people arealways asking us like how?
Like?
I get asked a lot of times inmy with my services.
Like I got a couple clientsthat literally just got married
and they always ask me, like howwas the first um year, the
(26:30):
first few months after you gotmarried?
Because they're trying to likeget used to like their own
routines and like she's morelike wants to get things done
around the house and he wants tojust chill things like that.
So they're learning eachother's ways and I always tell
people honestly it really tooklike a good five, six years
(26:50):
before we could like reallyDon't you think?
Really what Like get eachother's love, languages and
things and understand eachother's like way of
communicating and what we need,our needs?
Speaker 2 (26:58):
Yeah, In order to make it work.
I yeah, it takes a while.
It takes a while because thenyou got to get out of the
honeymoon stage and then you seethe, the person for who they
really are things happen.
Yeah, sometimes you realize youmarried a monster, or you maybe
not, but uh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
So you see, he would not be here if I was not as
great to him.
Okay, this man would not behere still If I was not treating
him as the King that he is.
Okay, let's just make that veryclear right now.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
What I tell you on the last episode get beat, he is
lying anyways, one of the otheruh thingies on here was talking
about do you believe in genderroles?
Speaker 1 (27:51):
um and I really want to talk about this why do you
want to talk about this?
He could be sweet and short,because I feel like we only have
, like one other couple, friendor married couple that are very
similar to us, to where we don'thave gender roles, and I say
that because he does laundrywillingly.
I don't make him do it, he doescook.
(28:15):
Sometimes, you know he doesn'tclean, but he does.
He does laundry, he folds,folds it, he puts it away, he
cooks erica didn't know, I cancook until like I prefer him to
cook than me probably two yearsago yeah.
So, um, I feel like sometimespeople think that's crazy that
you do laundry and he doesdishes not all the time, but he
(28:39):
does it.
I think that that's the way itshould be.
I think you should meet eachother halfway.
I think that it shouldn't beall the woman's responsibility,
unless she's like a stay-at-homemom.
I get it, but we both work.
So I feel like those kind ofthings should be kind of 50 50
in a way, or at least thehusband or your man can help you
sometimes with certain things,to kind of like lift the load.
(29:02):
I feel like you try to justrelieve the load off of my
shoulders by doing those thingsbecause you want to I feel like
gender roles.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
I don't know, they never really existed.
For me, I feel like it wasalways.
I don't know what do you mean?
I don't.
I don't think a woman has tocook, but I think it should be
like, if I'm doing something youknow, make sure you're playing
your part to where we're helpingeach other.
You know what I mean.
(29:31):
Like it's about making yoursignificant other an equal, not
you know no.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
One's the dominant person in the relationship.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
You know no one's the dominant person in the
relationship.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Mm-hmm, so yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
I don't believe in gender roles, so I don't think
every woman should cook.
I don't think every guy shouldchange the oil on the car.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Yeah, I don't think none of that.
Yeah, because you think hechanges the oil.
Hold on, bro, don't do that.
Come on, who changed the airfilter?
We call the people because wepay for it.
I did it one time, though, likethere's no gender roles.
If I can do it, I can do it andthat's fine.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
I don't care any other time I pay for role side
assistance, I know, but I'm justsaying like, yeah, I don't care
, any other time I pay forroadside assistance.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
They coming All right , I know.
But I'm just saying like, yeah,there's certain things that I'm
fine with doing that a manwould probably do, but it's cool
.
I feel like honestly and it istrue, like you know, I've heard
things also like you're so luckyto have him that he does that,
and I think it's weird thatpeople don't have that.
(30:41):
I think it's weird that peopledon't have the kind of
relationship where you both canmeet each other halfway and help
each other out.
Speaker 2 (30:48):
I don't think we know many people who have One good
relationships to relationshipswhere they're still growing, or
you know what I mean I don'tthink anyone has the
relationship that we have and Idon't even try to compare it and
I don't see our relationship inother people, because I feel
(31:10):
like it's just different.
You know what I mean.
Like we were homeless together.
You know what I mean.
It's different.
We were broke together, we were.
We went through a lot that Imean we've never really talked
about some of the stuff we have,some of the stuff we haven't,
but we went through a lottogether and I don't think
(31:31):
people go through enough stufftogether yeah I think they look
at it like oh, it's me and I'mdoing this for my family and
it's like yeah you're doing thistogether.
Everyone has their own opinionon it, or everyone's going
through it a different way orthe same way, and you don't
realize it.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
So yeah, I feel like because, at the end of the day,
if avery was like don't get mewrong, there's things that I
want in life, and he knows that.
But I'm also trying to, I'mtrying to work there, I'm trying
to work my way there.
Like, at the end of the day, Ithink about things like what if
he lost his arms?
What if he couldn't?
No, for real, like what if?
(32:08):
I think about these thingsevery day?
Speaker 2 (32:10):
you'll feed me jello.
Speaker 1 (32:11):
I joke about being a stay-at-home mom, honestly,
because if I could be astay-at-home mom, content
creator, I would, but honestly Idon't put the work in to get
there.
So that's, that's that, um, butlike, if I could do that, of
course I would love that.
I.
That's my dream and I do thinkI will get there one day.
I'm still going to work.
I just won't work as much,right, but right now I'm going
through a journey because I wantto be able to provide for my
(32:35):
family and my kids, and I lookat my kids and I know the things
that they want.
I want to be able to give thatto them without his help.
So I just feel like, if he losthis arms and we were I mean,
we're not rich but if we werelike, completely broke and we
had to be on the streets again,would I still love this man,
like, would I still want to bewith him?
(32:56):
And and of course, the answeris yes, we We've already been
there.
I know that it would neverhappen, because he would allow
it if that makes sense, but youjust never know what could
happen.
Like your significant othercould literally go, get in the
car and completely lose theirlegs and their arms and not be
able to do the same things thatthey used to do for you.
So that to me, is a realrelationship and I think you
(33:18):
know my heart and they used todo for you.
So that to me is a realrelationship and I think you
know my heart and like, yeah,you have arms and limbs now, so
I expect you to help withcertain things, but if he
couldn't, it wouldn't change.
That would be a totallydifferent kind of like love why
you keep saying arms and legsI'm just saying because people
don't think about things likethat.
Their love is very conditional.
(33:38):
Women just want like I don'tknow, I think I'm different than
other women.
They want like a man with moneyand the man to just I will say
you're not.
Speaker 2 (33:53):
I feel like all the women out here in Arizona are
looking for.
They're looking for like asugar daddy and all that.
And I want to be a stay-at-homemom and all that.
You're like, uh, a small town,wholesome significant other and
we're talking about that at theshop the other day we were like,
man, you can go back to themidwest and find, find a wife or
(34:15):
something like that.
And they're not like asmaterialistic as people out here
, because it's just different.
They didn't grow up aroundplastic surgery and lip fillers
and all that crazy stuff.
So it's which sometimes whatyou want in life is based on
what you come from.
Speaker 1 (34:34):
Is this recording?
Speaker 2 (34:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
Oh, I thought it was green when it records.
See the number.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
Yeah, see, I should just interrupted me.
Hey, one time we were recordinga whole podcast and it wasn't
recording.
It was not recording, and it'serica's fault that would be so I
would have just quit today.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
I'm not gonna lie to you, it's erica's fault.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
I ain't gonna lie to you all right, I have another
question.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Oh my gosh, come on, it's about really okay.
Speaker 2 (34:58):
This one is I don't like this laugh, so skip the
card you have the password toyour partner's phone and y'all
need to interact.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
I know y'all be watching these videos, so leave
a comment below what do youthink, girl?
You tell me girl um you know soshould you have your partner's
password to their phone.
Let me just say I know hispassword why?
You know, I've known that hispassword's been the same since
we got together no, it hasn'tyes, it has no, it hasn't.
(35:30):
Yes, it has what was it before?
I didn't have a password beforewell, you got one now, and I've
known it for a long time.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
So erica nosy yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
So what do you think about that?
Do you know mine?
Yes, you act like you don'tknow mine sometimes because you
hand me my phone sometimes youchange stuff and I don't know
what you be changing.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
but I I'd be like I know, because the kids I know,
but that's why I'd be like Idon't know what it is.
So here you don't even rememberyour own passwords.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
I know, I lose, I forget.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
That's why I ask because it's like hey, did she
change?
Did she forget again?
Did you change it?
That's like but like my emailpassword or my Apple ID or
something.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
I change it ever so often, but yeah, we have each
other's passcodes.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
What do you feel about that?
I mean, I feel like I don'thave nothing to hide.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
I don't feel like it's what it used to be.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
I don't feel like what do you mean?
Speaker 1 (36:31):
Obviously, we went through the beginning stages of
me finding things I did not liketo see, okay.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
Yeah, I mean, but that's like that's one of those
things you kind of got to growinto.
If you want to be in arelationship, you have to
understand what that means, andI don't think a lot of guys
actually understand what thatmeans, and I didn't.
I was 22, 23.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
He did not.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
And she was 27, 28.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
So I was looking for a whole husband.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
it's a lot to uh, I mean, you got to change your
ways, but I don't think I had,like, I had real relationships,
but they weren't like.
The person I was with ended upmoving away.
You know what I mean.
So, when it comes to being in arelationship where you're there
with that person every, singleday it's a whole different thing
(37:20):
, so I had to get used to that.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
Yeah, so what did you have to change?
Speaker 2 (37:26):
What did I have to change?
I had to be thoughtful, I hadto be.
It's either you're all in it oryou're not, and I had to figure
that out and I had to be.
I don't know, I feel like I hadto.
I went through badrelationships, so it was one of
those.
I have to trust this person andopen up to this person in a way
(37:47):
that I've never done before,and that was hard because I've.
When you come up and you don'teven have, like you have parents
in your life, but you don't,you know what?
Speaker 1 (37:57):
I mean, yeah, I don't have any, like you have parents
in your life, but you don't youknow what I mean.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
I don't have my grandma.
I lived with my grandma from 16on, so I already didn't know
how to communicate.
I'm trying to be with an olderwoman and, uh, I don't know how
to talk about how I feel.
That's something that's hard todo, especially Like I was still
figuring all that out.
I got my first apartment withErica.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
I didn't have none of that.
We lost our first apartmenttogether.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
We ain't going to go there.
Speaker 1 (38:27):
We ain't going to go there, but yeah, I mean like
communication, I feel like isthe biggest, biggest thing, and
we just talked about this toounder the comments on Facebook
and I basically just just Istated and I don't want it to
sound just I, so I can clarifybasically I kind of said
something like you, what was it?
You made a post.
(38:47):
Basically it was talking abouthow men can't communicate, or
men don't want to communicate,or they feel like they can't
communicate.
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
So my post was that a lot of us aren't taught to
communicate and it's been athing to where, like it's
expected for men not to know howto communicate.
I feel like there's a lot ofposts out there that are coming
from women specifically that say, oh, men don't communicate, and
men don't know how tocommunicate, and come to me
(39:15):
healed and all this, this andthis yeah, they don't want a man
that can't communicate.
Basically, they don't wantsomeone who is a project.
Basically, right, I was aproject.
Speaker 1 (39:25):
I'm married, y'all single so basically what I said
I don't care somebody left acomment basically was kind of
like I don't know how, likewhere it was coming from,
basically.
But I just want to make itclear.
What I'm saying is that becauseI basically stated somebody was
(39:46):
saying something like do theyneed to be in a relationship?
I don't know how it got to thatpoint.
What was it Like do you need tobe?
Speaker 2 (39:52):
in a relationship.
Someone said you shouldn't waituntil you're in a relationship
to choose to learn how tocommunicate.
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
And they basically said they didn't want someone
that they have to wait to bebasically good at communicating
and better for the next person.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
But see, I didn't understand.
I understand now, Like I get it, but I also didn't understand
then because, like I didn't know, people felt that way.
You know what I mean.
I don't I don't necessarilyagree or disagree, because
that's how they feel, that's onthem, but I don't necessarily.
I didn't understand it at firstbecause I'd never seen someone
(40:30):
say that I've heard it it wassomething that I was like you
should learn how to communicateon your own.
What if you don't know how?
You have that problem what if?
what if you don't know thatthere's an issue right there?
Right, because no guy is evergoing to tell another guy you
don't know how to communicate.
No one, no guy, has ever saidthat about someone.
(40:52):
I know people who I know, oneperson, one guy.
When they come in a barbershop,I don't think their
communication skills are thegreatest right, but I'm not
going to sit there and tell themyou need to learn how to
communicate.
I'm not going to do that at all.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
It's going to be a woman that tells you that it's
going to be a woman that tellsyou yeah, and I basically stated
, like unfortunately, sometimesthat is the way that it is.
I mean, that's the case for us.
If I think about it, if Ihadn't been as graceful and as
patient and willing to work bothways though, because we both
obviously needed to learn how tocommunicate, or like we needed
(41:30):
to learn how to communicate toeach other not necessarily just
communicate Like there's a wayto get through to me and there's
a way to get through to him.
So for me, I basically statedsometimes, unfortunately, that's
the way it is, though you'regonna get with somebody and they
may not know how to communicatethe best.
You're either gonna give upright and let him go and then,
(41:51):
or you're gonna work through itand try to figure it out if you
want to be really long-term andsolid.
Obviously, if I had given up,he could have met somebody else.
That person could have beenjust like me as I stayed with
him, more graceful, more patientand had a great way of, like, I
guess, learning how tocommunicate together, and then
he would have been great forthat person.
(42:12):
So I'm just saying I understand, like women that maybe don't
want to do that, don't whatever,but personally I feel like I
got just saying I understand,like women, that maybe don't
want to do that, don't whatever.
But personally I feel like Igot lucky because I last you
know what I mean I stayedthrough it, I stuck it out and I
wanted to grow.
So basically, what I statedunder somebody else's comment of
maybe basically them sayingsomething like like you should,
(42:35):
so are you saying like youshould train them, kind of thing
, and I don't know what else,but my reply to that is that
what I'm saying is what I justsaid.
I'm just saying it's a wantingto grow together, it's a
partnership, especially ifyou're married.
You want to grow, you want tolearn how to communicate.
It's a one thing he has to wantto learn to communicate.
(42:55):
It has to go both ways.
We have to meet each other bothways because if we don't, then
it's a one thing he has to wantto learn to communicate.
It has to go both ways.
We have to meet each other bothways, because if we don't then
it's kind of a lost win, like,yeah, I probably would give up
because I'm not going to keeptrying and you're not trying to
meet me halfway.
But I also stated that I thinksometimes women, us women- take
accountability girl takeaccountability.
(43:17):
We make it very difficult for aman to communicate, let alone a
black man to communicate,because they're not raised to do
that.
They're not.
They half the time don't havetwo parents to really look up to
in a relationship nowadays,right and then they're expected
to be this high and mighty,strong guy, tough all the time,
(43:38):
don't show any weakness, noemotion.
I mean, you can't have yourcake and eat it too.
So I feel like women want likethat, and then they don't want a
man with emotion, but then theyget mad that a man's not
communicating and it's just alot.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
She's spinning.
Speaker 1 (43:54):
I'm just saying, take my haircut yeah.
Yeah, I just feel like for usthat's what's worked and don't
get me wrong, we're not perfectLike it has been a long, long,
long journey.
I was never perfect.
I think I sucked atcommunication Actually too, but
(44:15):
you know it's a timing thing.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Facts.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
That's just what I think.
Speaker 2 (44:21):
I I'm gonna tell y'all right now y'all homies in
the streets, ain't gonna bethere when you down.
Speaker 1 (44:26):
Bad my boy, you feel me the girl gonna be there when
you down bad my boy, you'll know, it's the one when that person
creates like a safe space foryou to to communicate, because
he knows I would rather him beopen with me and talk to me
about everything, even if I getupset, so that we can get over
that and move past it and Idon't know how to deal with it
(44:47):
the next time around.
Then for him to not tell meanything, which is still a
working progress, becausethere's still things I know he
feels like he can't tell me.
But but I'm trying, I'm workingon that internally, where I
want to kind of take a moment tolike sit and think before I
respond, or I'm trying to see itfrom his perspective instead of
(45:08):
just mine.
So we're still working on it.
Speaker 2 (45:12):
Yeah, I communicate through text message.
I ain't gonna lie.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (45:15):
Because I need time to register everything I hate it
.
Text message I ain't gonna lie.
Exactly because I need time toregister everything I hate,
because I'm one of those peoplewho I'd rather be quiet than say
something I'm gonna have toapologize for later so you're
quick to react.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Exactly because why you have what?
I have what what do you have?
Speaker 2 (45:31):
what do I have?
Speaker 1 (45:32):
what do you have?
I don't know.
What are you going with?
Speaker 2 (45:34):
this, what do I have?
Speaker 1 (45:35):
angry issues.
Let's be real I have angerissues.
But not physically.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
Emotionally.
I've been told my family hasbipolar disorder.
Right, I have irrationalanxiety.
Those are all things that stemfrom.
Whatever they stem from, whatdo you do?
Do you control it or you don't?
That's it.
Speaker 1 (45:56):
Yeah, what's your advice to men?
What have you been doing towork on that?
Speaker 2 (46:00):
I ain't been doing nothing.
Dog, yes you have.
Speaker 1 (46:02):
What have you been doing?
Speaker 2 (46:02):
almost every night you snitching.
Today, dang, all right.
Speaker 1 (46:06):
Look, I got a journal .
You need to help them.
I got a journal and I've beenwriting every day, say you
journal hold on, I'm talking now.
Speaker 2 (46:16):
I try.
All right, I try.
The one thing you got to do ismake effort.
That's all you can do yeah, youtalk to a therapist, you can do
that but.
I ain't gonna lie.
A lot of y'all ain't got healthinsurance.
I'm calling you out yes, sir, alot of y'all don't have health
insurance.
People who do y'all be scaredto talk to somebody?
Dog, ain't nothing wrong withtalking to somebody oh, but I'll
(46:37):
tell you why.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
I know someone in a marriage that will not go to a
therapist because they said theydon't feel that anybody else
should be in their business.
It should be between them andgod you snitching?
I'm just saying nobody knowswho that is but there's really
men that don't feel like theyshould talk to therapists or
have marriage counseling orwhatnot, because nobody should
(46:59):
be in their business or whatever.
Personally, I think it'shealthy because they're biased.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
Honestly, even if you have a group of guys that you
can talk to, like I go to theshop.
I'll talk to my clients all thetime.
I'll talk to the guys at theshop that I work with.
I'll talk to my friends all thetime, because they should be
able to tell me that I'm wrong.
Right, when I'm cuttingsomebody's hair.
I'm going to tell them okay,this is what I went through.
(47:26):
I went through the same thing,but this is how I handled it.
You can handle it different.
There are other ways, there aredifferent avenues you can go
through, but the way you'regoing through it can lead to
destruction.
Right, Alcohol is going to leadto destruction.
A lot of these other things aregoing to lead to destruction.
If you're intoxicated and youjust so happen to go out because
you're stressed out, whathappens?
(47:48):
You're going to try to cheat.
Speaker 1 (47:50):
That's just what it is.
You're not going to be in yourright mind.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
You got to.
I mean, you just got to figureit out.
You got to talk to somebody.
Somebody who's in your corneror somebody you look at, that's
actually respectable enough togive you the right advice.
Give you the right advice yeah,but that's me, I don't know.
Yeah, I tried to journal.
Speaker 1 (48:11):
I'm married.
I tried one.
I'm not gonna.
I tried one page of journalingand I don't know what it is, but
I cannot get my thoughts onpaper.
I feel like I need to actuallytalk to somebody.
Why, I don't know, I just can't.
It's like it's like jumble,like it's too much.
I feel like I would, I wouldbenefit more from therapy like
one-on-one.
Yeah, like that actually bereally great for me.
(48:32):
I've been, I've actually beenthinking about looking into that
, especially right now with ourinsurance and stuff yeah, you
know, we hey, we got insurance.
Speaker 2 (48:39):
You feel me, because I'm not a journaler, I'm not, I
don't like writing honestly.
Speaker 1 (48:43):
It gives me anxiety and my hand starts hurting and I
don't know how you do it.
Speaker 2 (48:47):
I can't I'm a writer.
I'm an artist.
I know I'm not.
I'm a creator, I'm a creativeperson I'm not it just comes to
me yeah, now slowly and I sortthrough it slowly.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
But I highly recommend it, so I'm proud of
you for doing that.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
You need to sign up for a therapist.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
You know we got insurance.
I've already been thinkingabout it Because I feel like
there's progress individually,but I feel like obviously there
could always be more.
Why not Facts?
Yeah, that's a little bit aboutus.
Anything else you want to?
I?
Speaker 2 (49:21):
don't know.
Speaker 1 (49:22):
Is there anything else that you want to talk about
besides me?
Speaker 2 (49:26):
I don't have nothing to talk about.
I ain't going to lie to you.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
Well, what made you want to make this video?
Speaker 2 (49:35):
Because I think you forgot that I had game Shut up.
So I want you to realize that Ithink you forgot that I had
game Shut up.
So I want you to realize that Ipulled you All right Mic
dropped.
Speaker 1 (49:47):
Whatever?
Speaker 2 (49:50):
All right, that's probably the end of this video.
Speaker 1 (49:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:55):
It's the end of this podcast, the end of this episode
.
Whatever you want to say, youknow like subscribe.
Is there anything else you wantto talk about before we go?
You got one one, one chance no,not really.
Speaker 1 (50:08):
I think that's pretty much it.
If you guys have any questions,don't hesitate to ask.
If you guys have any questionsthat you want us to do, like
another podcast on let us know.
Um, I want to say thank you forwatching even though a few of
you that do watch, we reallyappreciate it.
Share our video for us andwe'll be back with another one
and hopefully we won't take longto come back again.
Speaker 2 (50:30):
So this video will drop around august 2nd.
What's that?
Speaker 1 (50:36):
day I met erica 10 years ago, august 2nd.
What's that day?
Speaker 2 (50:37):
I met Erica 10 years ago, August 2nd.
Speaker 1 (50:41):
But we started dating August 2nd, I mean September
2nd.
Speaker 2 (50:45):
This video dropped August 2nd.
I met Erica 10 years ago, onAugust 2nd.
We started dating in September2nd.
Come on man, it only take amonth to find your wife dog.
All right.
So y'all need to do better,y'all out there in them streets.
God don't like that.
I sound like an uncle right now.
Speaker 1 (51:06):
Yeah, you're old anyways, guys, that'll be it for
today's podcast.
Thank you so much for watchingand shout out to hella awkward
for always having the best shoutout hella, awkward, awkward,
for you know the icebreaker,always powered by Hella, awkward
.
Yeah, there's some good ones inhere.
We're going to talk about nextweek, no we?
Speaker 2 (51:24):
ain't no, we not.
Yes, we are.
Anyways, if you like our newsetup, let us know.
Yeah, let us know If you wantus to go back?
Say no.
Leave it in the comments,because this was Erica's idea.
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Yeah, and hopefully when we move we can have like a
little light in the background.
Speaker 2 (51:43):
You, know she got all these ideas.
She trying to tell y'all toomuch.
Speaker 1 (51:46):
But check it out.
Speaker 2 (51:47):
This is the other half podcast Peace.
hi guys hola been a minute since we've been back
tell them where you've been I'vejust been busy with life and
then now I'm sick, so I'mactually not that great today,
but I showed up you're gonnawant me to touch my mic, so let
me touch my mic, right now.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
So the challenge for today's podcast is going to be,
first of all, no touching of themic my gosh.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Okay, where's the love?
Speaker 1 (00:36):
where's the?
Speaker 2 (00:37):
love.
Anyways, since she ain't bringus in, right, allow me.
This is the other half podcast.
I'm your boy, tino.
You feel me big?
Tino, that's what they call mein the streets.
This is, um.
Who are you?
Erica okay, erica, what ledge?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
okay period the boss you tell them, girl, you tell
them anyways, all right, so youcan say what our video is going
to be for today um, first of all, we're going to start with our
icebreakers.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I don't know why erica's trying to jump the gun
and rush me into something I'mnot ready for, but that's why I
don't start it, because you tryto correct me all the time
anyways, all right.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
So I so well I pulled a few just because they're
going to be kind of part of ourrelationship in our podcast
today.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Part of our topic.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Yeah, and then they're also going to be.
I can't think of the word, butit's like it keeps the
conversation going.
Okay, well, the first one ispretty much our podcast today.
Hold on, let me get it.
Let me get it right.
Tell a story.
How did you and your partnermeet?
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Are you serious?
I look Erica's stressing me outtoday I see what's going on
here, you don't want to do thatone.
It says tell a story about howyou and your partner met.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
I told her before this, our topic for today was
how we met.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
Hey, how you going to pull a card.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Okay, fine, alright, okay, this is the one that's
already the topic.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Okay, so the first one that I found.
It says what is something yourpartner wants you to be more
thoughtful about?
Speaker 2 (02:20):
What?
Why did you pick this card?
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Because I already know there's something.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
You got something on your mind?
No, I was thinking that youwould have something on your
mind?
Speaker 1 (02:31):
What?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
More thoughtful about .
I don't know If I had to say Idon't know right now.
I need a couple seconds tothink about that because I gotta
get in my bag what's somethingthat you always tell me.
I tell you a lot that I couldwork on you know what's
(02:56):
something you could work on.
You could smile a little more.
Sometimes you come in the houseand you just be very
unapproachable, like you're justabout to beat the skin off one
of us how, okay, wait, how,almost 10 years in, you want to
(03:17):
tell me I should smile more.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
You sound like everybody else.
I don't know you right now.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Do it.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
That is my biggest pet peeve.
I don't understand why my facebothers other people.
I'm not Okay.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
Okay, if you wake up in the morning or you come home
from work and I say, hey, how'sit going?
And you say, good, you see howthat sounds Like.
Don't bother me.
I'm not in the mood for thisright now.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I probably don't want to be bothered, okay.
That's the one thing.
What did you think You've beenmaking me look bad?
People are already roasting meall the dang time.
What did you think the onething would be?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
What did you think the one thing would be?
Speaker 1 (04:06):
More affectionate.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
I already tell you that enough.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
I know.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
I need to do something different.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Anyways, it's fine, you guys, we just let you enter
our whole relationship.
It's cool.
No, I don't know.
Anyways, I don't know somethingthat hold on, let me think.
Actually, actually, you'rewhere you're actually doing
better at it.
I think it's just being likethoughtful for me with you, like
(04:40):
you're pretty much alreadyperfect it, it's fine.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
But don't lie.
I want to hear what you sayabout me.
When you at work, are youtalking to your friends?
Y'all talking trash about y'allmen.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
I do not talk trash, okay, is that what y'all do in
the shop?
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Of course, Well, that's really rude.
I'm just playing Dang.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
I would say this is going to go into another
question, though, too.
So I feel like I always this ismy biggest thing Cause food.
I don't know about you women,but food is the way to my heart.
It really is.
I'm like the man.
I feel like I always make surethat he is fed.
I feed everybody before me, Imake sure he ate.
(05:25):
You know what I mean.
So we don't have gender roles.
So he does cook food for mesometimes, when he knows I'm
gonna have a long day and I comehome and eat.
But sometimes he doesn't.
Okay, and sometimes he wants tocook, cook, but then he'll cook
(05:47):
and it's like 10 o'clock atnight and I literally said to
him I want to try to eat before8 pm because you know I probably
need to.
No, he still sometimes waits.
What's a man do when he getshome?
He gets on the game.
Right, sure you know.
Home, he gets on the game rightSure do.
You know they don't stay on thegame for an hour or two.
(06:08):
They're on the game for atleast five, six hours.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
And this man gets home early, he's on that game
for about eight hours.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Why are you lying?
Because he started cooking.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Erica, do you know the math of eight?
Speaker 1 (06:18):
hours, don't forget.
We have a ring camera.
I can see when you get home.
If I get home at 6, 8 hours.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It's 2 am.
I be asleep by 2 am.
That is a lie.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Sometimes you're not in bed till 1 after the game.
That's still not, I don't evencare that he plays the game I'm
just saying 6 hours.
If you say you're going to makefood make it in time.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Be thoughtful, because I always make that you
eat at a right at a good time.
Okay, that's it all.
Right, let me tell my story.
Let me tell my side.
Right, I gotta eat late.
I'm gonna tell you why, why youthink I gotta eat late, doesn't
matter I gotta eat late becauseif it's a certain time and I'm
hungry again, I don't want tofeel hungry again.
All right, if I eat too early, Iget hungry by the end of the
night, then I wake again.
I don't want to feel hungryagain.
All right, if I eat too early,I get hungry by the end of the
(07:08):
night, then I wake up and Idon't always eat in the morning
and I'm hungry again.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
I understand that, but that's about you See.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Oh, you got to put your hand in my face.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
You're thinking about you again, all right, so that
was the first one, so Can'tbelieve this dog.
What's today's video about?
Go ahead?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Today's video since she ruined the mood is about the
first time we met.
All right, so we're going totell the story of the first time
we met.
I'm going to let you tell itwhy.
Because I feel like you justknow everything.
(07:52):
I just want to know yourperspective.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Well, I mean the first time we met or the first
time we saw each other, becauseI don't feel like we had a first
time.
I mean actually yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
First time we saw each other.
And then we met later, ofcourse, but you know, first time
, first time you laid eyes onthe big fella.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
First time I met Avery was I had been single for
six months.
My friends dragged me out toTown Crier Shout out to Town
Crier in Tri-Cities, washington.
I did not want to go I'm not aclubber and anyway so I was
sitting there.
And then of course, I know hisbrother, cedric.
So obviously, if I see Cedric,cedric was somebody that all my
(08:39):
friends knew.
He was a pretty popular guy,and then this guy was standing
next to him.
I think even like what rome,derome or whatever his name was
there there's a couple of theirfriends, yeah so it was kind of
one of those things where, like,I saw him, but honestly I
wasn't looking, I didn't reallypay attention and she seen me.
You're that yeah, because I sawhis brother and I was never
(09:02):
ever interested in in hisbrother like everybody else, so
kind of like one of those Lookturn, that's funny.
And then what happened?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
What happened, Erica?
Speaker 1 (09:16):
No.
What's your version of when youno?
Speaker 2 (09:19):
you got to tell the rest, you got to tell your story
.
So then I can double back.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
OK, so well then after that.
So we left early.
I don't remember why.
I think we just rest.
You got to tell your story, sothen I can double back.
Okay, so well then after that.
So we left early.
I don't remember why, I thinkwe just wanted to leave.
We left early.
Um, next morning I get amessage on facebook from avery
and basically he was, you know,trying to talk to me and at
first I was like who's this guy?
I honestly didn't know who youwere.
(09:43):
At first I was like who's thisguy?
I honestly didn't know who youwere.
At first I didn't piece the twotogether that you were the guy
standing next to your brother.
Then I looked at his Facebookpage.
Obviously I realized he hadmutual friends with my friends.
And then his brother, and thenwe ended up meeting back at the
(10:04):
same place, I remember, becauseyou were wearing a red long
sleeve kind of hoodie shirt andthen we just, yeah, we met there
and we hung out with one of myother friends and just started
talking and then we starteddating all right, I'm gonna say
this erica, don't got no friends, no more so old friends.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
You know what I'm saying.
You know she had some friendsthat didn't like that she was
dating me.
Yeah, I said, girl, you bettercut them off I don't have those
friends anymore I ain't tellingher to cut them off, but no, he
didn't, it'd be like that.
All right, this is what happened.
Right, I'm out with my brotheroutside, outside, like like a
(10:44):
little ratchet, you know, I'msaying out in these streets and
uh, I had just moved towashington like a couple months
before, right, I moved towashington in april.
The day I seen erica was august1st, see, I remember like it
was yesterday.
So I seen her august 1st it was.
(11:08):
Uh, was that a saturday, Ithink?
Yep, sound about right, soundabout right then.
Um, so we went out.
I was like who is?
that my brother got this lamefriend.
He's a a clown.
All right, I'll tell you rightnow.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Clown, he's a fan actually.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
So I'll tell him hey, who is that?
Like you know her?
No, but I'm going to go talk toher.
What?
All right, he goes, talks toher, gets shut down.
Cool, I'm like, well, youruined that for me.
So then I'm like, well, youruined that for me.
So then I'm trying to build upmy confidence to go holler,
right, I'll turn around, shegone.
(11:50):
But the first time I seen herit was like God was like hey, my
boy, this for you, my boy, youfeel me, I got you.
I was like, for sure, you feelme.
Who am I to be disobedient?
Come on now, come on now.
So yeah, you know, so, she wasgone I was like dang.
But I knew who she was withbecause my brother introduced me
(12:12):
to one of her friends thecouple weeks before.
So I went to her friend'sFacebook profile you know I was
a Facebook detective, you feelme Went to her friend's profile
I said that's her right there,click Add a friend Message.
Come on, man.
That was the next day.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
I was talking to her the whole day.
You feel me Dang.
You remember a lot.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
I asked her for her number when I was.
What's that?
It's a highway.
George Washington Way turnedinto a highway to go by the mall
.
I was right there, past theexit of the mall, when she gave
me her number.
Come on, dog Dang.
Come on, dog, come on.
You know what I said to her.
Hold on, let me pull up themessage.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
You still have it.
You're lying, you're lying.
You literally still have ourmessages from.
That's crazy.
I'm gonna tell you what I said.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
I said, hey, I don't know you, but I think you're
gorgeous.
I was going to speak to you,but when I saw you last night my
friend got into a littlealtercation and when I looked up
you were gone.
I just want to know if I canget to know you what?
Speaker 1 (13:26):
What did I?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
say what did the young people say, riz?
What did the young people sayRiz?
Speaker 1 (13:30):
What did I say back?
Speaker 2 (13:32):
This is what she said back Hello, dot dot dot.
Lol, yeah, I think I rememberseeing you a few times.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Were you standing by, said and thank you, smiling
face times were you standing bysaid and thank you, smiling face
girl, you better quit it.
That's crazy.
I cannot how did you not tellme you had those this whole time
?
You're so annoying.
I never knew that you had thosemessages.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah I say, yeah, that's my brother, she's there.
Oh, I see.
Okay, cool, cool.
You want to read the rest?
Speaker 1 (14:09):
Yeah, here read the rest.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
That is so wild.
That's how you slide on a youngtenderoni that's older than you
.
You feel me?
Fellas, take notes, all right.
Guy, take notes, all right.
I don't hear nothing.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
I don't hear nothing, okay, okay okay, I said well, I
just moved back home, which isback to Washington.
I said I was raised here, wentto school here, family and
friends here.
I'm not really a club person.
See, I've always been true tomyself.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
See, and I knew it because she wasn't really
drinking and I don't reallydrink.
When I go out, I don't drink atall.
I don't know why I said when Igo out I don't drink.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
So yeah, I've never been drunk in my life yeah, and
I've never been the fun friendbecause I just I don't like
clubs, I don't dance, I don'treally like to drink, so I mean
I have drink, but I don't like,like drink like that.
So then I said um, but I likehaving fun with my friends and I
hang at bars and I'll hang atbars.
(15:12):
The one, what, like that one, Iguess.
Um, I'm pretty chill, laid back, you won't really hear much
about me or see me out often,cause, honestly, like yeah, I
just I was already in arelationship previously and like
just in that one in arelationship previously and like
just in that one, so I wasn'taround, like that, and then he
goes it seems like he knowseverybody out here, which he did
(15:35):
, yeah, and then you said wheredid I move from?
And you, you said yeah, Ifigure that honestly, that's why
I messaged you.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
Hey, mind you, this is the morning after.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
This is so weird.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Keep reading.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
Keep reading.
You want me to read the wholething.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Oh my God, Do you want?
Speaker 2 (15:59):
me to say his name.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Who?
I already said his name.
So then I said ha ha, yeah, Idon't know, said like that, but
I've heard of him because,honestly, I didn't know cedric
like that at all, I just knewabout him.
I said I moved from kansas andthen he made a little face and
said you heard good things orbad things as uh.
He said why did you move here?
(16:21):
And yeah, I moved here threemonths ago.
I'm from iowa.
My brother convinced me to movehere.
I said, honestly, I just know hedoes music or something because
I can sing and that a lot offemales want him, not including
me, lol I repeat not I put in otshe tried to make that like a
big thing because, becauseeverybody did, lol, I moved here
(16:47):
because my relationship of fouryears didn't work out, so I
decided to move back home, here,where my support was.
I said, oh, lol, yeah,tri-cities is pretty lame
compared to other places, butthat's because I'm a busy city
woman.
See, I'm still the same.
And then you just say, yeah,I'm aware of that.
Four years is a pretty longtime.
It's not that bad.
It's definitely nothing likewhere I'm from, but it's not
(17:07):
that bad, which you are so rightabout.
Then he asked me the bigquestion how old am I?
I said yeah, it's not bad.
If you're a real chill person,then you'll be fine.
I said this is 2015.
Yeah, no way.
(17:29):
Yeah, you know it.
What do you mean?
I said I'll be 27 in october.
I'm old, I know.
He said it's all right, you'renot that old.
Everybody is older than me outhere, though, I turned 23 this
month I was 22 mackins.
I don't keep going, you want meto read all my business, yeah
read it.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
Yeah, oh my god, yeah , take notes so then I said oh,
oh then he asked me the otherquestion.
Speaker 1 (17:51):
He said do you have kids?
Speaker 2 (17:54):
and is that a?
Speaker 1 (17:54):
good or a bad one.
You're always trying to like,read, like, get in my, my head
what do you mean?
Speaker 2 (18:01):
because you're like, is that a?
Speaker 1 (18:01):
good one or a bad one .
Is that a good one or a bad one?
Is that?
Speaker 2 (18:04):
a good thing or a bad thing.
We're trying to figure out ifyou're interested or if you're
not.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
I really I don't know .
Then I said yes, and that'susually what I tell guys that
want to get to know me, to scarethem away, even though I'm not
lying.
Lol.
I have five kids.
I said I was married for sixyears, right out of high school,
and I had three kids with mymarriage.
Then, when I was 23, I gotdivorced and I took my three
(18:30):
kids and he took my three kidsfrom me and they live in arizona
.
So now I only have my two kidsfrom my four-year relationship,
which was right after my firstrelationship out of high school
I said so no, they don't allhave different baby daddies,
just two different relationshipsusually works to scare most men
away, though.
So that's good, lol.
(18:51):
And said I've been in long-termrelationships, as you can see,
and that was a good all.
Like you, I don't know.
Oh, like you're young, yeah.
He laughed at me and he saidyou're terrible.
That's so bogus.
(19:11):
Hopefully you weren't trying toscare me away.
Well, I don't have any kids.
I have a lot of siblings andnieces and a nephew, but I want
children someday.
Do you ever see your other kids?
Then I said, lol, well, itworks with the ones I want.
That I don't want to talk to me?
Ha ha.
I just don't think a lot of mencan handle me or my life anyway
(19:34):
, so why not scare them away?
Which is so true.
She thought I couldn't handleher Facts Then I said, oh well,
that's nice, Family iseverything.
Smiley face yes, I just hadthem for the summer and now they
went back for school.
Then what was this?
You didn't respond to me tillthe next day.
That was august.
(19:59):
Second no same day dang yeahwhat I say then you said why do
you think you're hard to handle?
I agree I miss my family a lot.
Oh, that's good.
This is embarrassing.
I said because I'm dramatic,sensitive and feisty Hasn't
(20:21):
changed, huh, I have a lot ofresponsibilities and kids, so I
usually say you couldn't handlethis anyways, and it has done
well for now.
Yeah, because I was single forsix months and a lot of people
back home that heard I wassingle were trying to date me.
It was ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
And you come for the.
You fall for the new kid on theblock.
Come on.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Crazy, come on.
Well, I think I can handle you.
He says I said SMH.
He said don't doubt me, do youdrink or smoke?
Look, I'm trying to see.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
I said that's what they all say.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
I said I don't smoke, I drink socially which is true.
He said, wow, just put me witheverybody else.
Thanks, SMH.
And what do you mean socially?
Speaker 2 (21:09):
I do remember you asking me that.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
Like I would just drink when I want to with my
friends.
You want me to keep readingthis.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Is that right?
Speaker 1 (21:24):
You need to send this to me.
Anyway, we're not going to keepreading, but that's how we
started talking, and then we didthat till when?
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Dang, I was macking boy.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Honestly, you really weren't.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I said what you got planned for today?
Just working chilling.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
Same thing I still do we just having conversations.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
I live far.
Oh, yeah, for now till I buy acar.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
Which I did.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Yep, she did.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
I live 30 minutes away from him.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
We both didn't have a car.
We was brokey broke.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
When we first met I lived in, so everybody that
knows Tri-Cities.
I lived in Clonnell, Smalllittle town, one little road.
Speaker 2 (22:07):
Erica was trying to push me away.
She said so.
How many females did youmessage this morning after last
night?
Speaker 1 (22:11):
X.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
And what did I say?
Speaker 1 (22:18):
The only reason I messaged you is because I
thought I wouldn't.
I said oh, that's.
You said oh, that's not too bad.
And I only messaged one personthis morning.
Smartass, that's rude.
Then what did you say?
I said LMAO you said, the onlyreason I messaged you is because
I thought I wouldn't see youagain and that's a problem.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
Come on gang come on gang.
Is that the right one?
Good job, I thought I wouldn'tsee you again, and that's a
problem.
Come on gang, come on gang.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
Is that the right one ?
Good job, come on Good job,that was so sweet.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
She said, that was so sweet, you know.
Anyways, that's how we met guysI said if you didn't want to
talk to me, you would havestopped talking to me earlier,
shake my hand yeah and so then,what?
(23:14):
I said uh dang.
I said uh dang, she saidsomething about you.
I, like other guys, didn't geta reply.
I said other guys, sound likeeverybody wants you.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Yeah, I'm not going to you know you said they can
want what.
Yeah, I'm not going to you know, you said they can want what
they want.
Blow my bubble, but that's asmall city.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
But hey, I'm about to go, so text me.
Come on, man.
She could have just keptmessaging me, but I said I'm
about to go.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
So text me.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Yeah, I remember.
I remember texting you on myway to work and you said OK, I
guess.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
I'm about to go, so text me.
Yeah, I remember that's clever.
I remember texting you On myway to work.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
And you said Okay, I guess I'll save your number.
Text me.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Anyways yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
I am at work now.
Come on, man.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
Oh dang, yeah, see, I was at work.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
I said you doing too much, so I'll text you If I got
some spare time.
Go on, you don't want to seemToo thirsty, fellas, you don't
want to seem Too thirsty.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
I do remember you Saying that too, and I was like
Mmm, I know you're tripping.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
She said ha ha ha.
Spare time, okay, she said.
I said I'm just playing, I'mgoing gonna text you, but have a
good day at work, miss lady.
She said thanks, same to you.
Yeah, she said same to you herewe are that was 10 years ago,
(24:52):
right 10 years ago, um on august2nd 2015 2015.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
That's crazy A decade .
How do you feel you?
Speaker 2 (25:01):
didn't think I had the receipts, huh.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
No, I did not.
Yeah, don't play with me.
You're very good at keepingthings on the low.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Yeah, I don't play that.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
I don't even have those.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Dang.
So how's the last 10 years beenfor you?
Speaker 1 (25:16):
Honestly, I think we're at a good place.
It's been like you know, justups and downs, a lot of learning
, growing.
I just talked about this onfacebook decade in, you
definitely grow when you want togrow together, you definitely
learn each other's ways.
Um, I don't know.
(25:38):
I just feel like we've beenvery, very transparent and open
on here and you guys are likesuper open to listening and, you
know, sometimes leaving yourfeedback, having your own
assumptions and stuff.
So that's why we like to talkabout things.
But honestly, I feel like we'reprobably at the best place
we've ever been in ourrelationship and it's that I
can't even believe it's been 10years.
Literally, that's crazy.
Honestly, I feel like we'reprobably at the best place we've
(25:59):
ever been in our relationshipand it's that I can't even
believe it's been 10 years.
Literally, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
Yeah, you can know my boy.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
I know what do you feel like you've learned
throughout the what advice canyou get?
Cause I feel like people arealways asking us like how?
Like?
I get asked a lot of times inmy with my services.
Like I got a couple clientsthat literally just got married
and they always ask me, like howwas the first um year, the
(26:30):
first few months after you gotmarried?
Because they're trying to likeget used to like their own
routines and like she's morelike wants to get things done
around the house and he wants tojust chill things like that.
So they're learning eachother's ways and I always tell
people honestly it really tooklike a good five, six years
(26:50):
before we could like reallyDon't you think?
Really what Like get eachother's love, languages and
things and understand eachother's like way of
communicating and what we need,our needs?
Speaker 2 (26:58):
Yeah, In order to make it work.
I yeah, it takes a while.
It takes a while because thenyou got to get out of the
honeymoon stage and then you seethe, the person for who they
really are things happen.
Yeah, sometimes you realize youmarried a monster, or you maybe
not, but uh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
So you see, he would not be here if I was not as
great to him.
Okay, this man would not behere still If I was not treating
him as the King that he is.
Okay, let's just make that veryclear right now.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
What I tell you on the last episode get beat, he is
lying anyways, one of the otheruh thingies on here was talking
about do you believe in genderroles?
Speaker 1 (27:51):
um and I really want to talk about this why do you
want to talk about this?
He could be sweet and short,because I feel like we only have
, like one other couple, friendor married couple that are very
similar to us, to where we don'thave gender roles, and I say
that because he does laundrywillingly.
I don't make him do it, he doescook.
(28:15):
Sometimes, you know he doesn'tclean, but he does.
He does laundry, he folds,folds it, he puts it away, he
cooks erica didn't know, I cancook until like I prefer him to
cook than me probably two yearsago yeah.
So, um, I feel like sometimespeople think that's crazy that
you do laundry and he doesdishes not all the time, but he
(28:39):
does it.
I think that that's the way itshould be.
I think you should meet eachother halfway.
I think that it shouldn't beall the woman's responsibility,
unless she's like a stay-at-homemom.
I get it, but we both work.
So I feel like those kind ofthings should be kind of 50 50
in a way, or at least thehusband or your man can help you
sometimes with certain things,to kind of like lift the load.
(29:02):
I feel like you try to justrelieve the load off of my
shoulders by doing those thingsbecause you want to I feel like
gender roles.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
I don't know, they never really existed.
For me, I feel like it wasalways.
I don't know what do you mean?
I don't.
I don't think a woman has tocook, but I think it should be
like, if I'm doing something youknow, make sure you're playing
your part to where we're helpingeach other.
You know what I mean.
(29:31):
Like it's about making yoursignificant other an equal, not
you know no.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
One's the dominant person in the relationship.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
You know no one's the dominant person in the
relationship.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Mm-hmm, so yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
I don't believe in gender roles, so I don't think
every woman should cook.
I don't think every guy shouldchange the oil on the car.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Yeah, I don't think none of that.
Yeah, because you think hechanges the oil.
Hold on, bro, don't do that.
Come on, who changed the airfilter?
We call the people because wepay for it.
I did it one time, though, likethere's no gender roles.
If I can do it, I can do it andthat's fine.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
I don't care any other time I pay for role side
assistance, I know, but I'm justsaying like, yeah, I don't care
, any other time I pay forroadside assistance.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
They coming All right , I know.
But I'm just saying like, yeah,there's certain things that I'm
fine with doing that a manwould probably do, but it's cool
.
I feel like honestly and it istrue, like you know, I've heard
things also like you're so luckyto have him that he does that,
and I think it's weird thatpeople don't have that.
(30:41):
I think it's weird that peopledon't have the kind of
relationship where you both canmeet each other halfway and help
each other out.
Speaker 2 (30:48):
I don't think we know many people who have One good
relationships to relationshipswhere they're still growing, or
you know what I mean I don'tthink anyone has the
relationship that we have and Idon't even try to compare it and
I don't see our relationship inother people, because I feel
(31:10):
like it's just different.
You know what I mean.
Like we were homeless together.
You know what I mean.
It's different.
We were broke together, we were.
We went through a lot that Imean we've never really talked
about some of the stuff we have,some of the stuff we haven't,
but we went through a lottogether and I don't think
(31:31):
people go through enough stufftogether yeah I think they look
at it like oh, it's me and I'mdoing this for my family and
it's like yeah you're doing thistogether.
Everyone has their own opinionon it, or everyone's going
through it a different way orthe same way, and you don't
realize it.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
So yeah, I feel like because, at the end of the day,
if avery was like don't get mewrong, there's things that I
want in life, and he knows that.
But I'm also trying to, I'mtrying to work there, I'm trying
to work my way there.
Like, at the end of the day, Ithink about things like what if
he lost his arms?
What if he couldn't?
No, for real, like what if?
(32:08):
I think about these thingsevery day?
Speaker 2 (32:10):
you'll feed me jello.
Speaker 1 (32:11):
I joke about being a stay-at-home mom, honestly,
because if I could be astay-at-home mom, content
creator, I would, but honestly Idon't put the work in to get
there.
So that's, that's that, um, butlike, if I could do that, of
course I would love that.
I.
That's my dream and I do thinkI will get there one day.
I'm still going to work.
I just won't work as much,right, but right now I'm going
through a journey because I wantto be able to provide for my
(32:35):
family and my kids, and I lookat my kids and I know the things
that they want.
I want to be able to give thatto them without his help.
So I just feel like, if he losthis arms and we were I mean,
we're not rich but if we werelike, completely broke and we
had to be on the streets again,would I still love this man,
like, would I still want to bewith him?
(32:56):
And and of course, the answeris yes, we We've already been
there.
I know that it would neverhappen, because he would allow
it if that makes sense, but youjust never know what could
happen.
Like your significant othercould literally go, get in the
car and completely lose theirlegs and their arms and not be
able to do the same things thatthey used to do for you.
So that to me, is a realrelationship and I think you
(33:18):
know my heart and they used todo for you.
So that to me is a realrelationship and I think you
know my heart and like, yeah,you have arms and limbs now, so
I expect you to help withcertain things, but if he
couldn't, it wouldn't change.
That would be a totallydifferent kind of like love why
you keep saying arms and legsI'm just saying because people
don't think about things likethat.
Their love is very conditional.
(33:38):
Women just want like I don'tknow, I think I'm different than
other women.
They want like a man with moneyand the man to just I will say
you're not.
Speaker 2 (33:53):
I feel like all the women out here in Arizona are
looking for.
They're looking for like asugar daddy and all that.
And I want to be a stay-at-homemom and all that.
You're like, uh, a small town,wholesome significant other and
we're talking about that at theshop the other day we were like,
man, you can go back to themidwest and find, find a wife or
(34:15):
something like that.
And they're not like asmaterialistic as people out here
, because it's just different.
They didn't grow up aroundplastic surgery and lip fillers
and all that crazy stuff.
So it's which sometimes whatyou want in life is based on
what you come from.
Speaker 1 (34:34):
Is this recording?
Speaker 2 (34:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
Oh, I thought it was green when it records.
See the number.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
Yeah, see, I should just interrupted me.
Hey, one time we were recordinga whole podcast and it wasn't
recording.
It was not recording, and it'serica's fault that would be so I
would have just quit today.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
I'm not gonna lie to you, it's erica's fault.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
I ain't gonna lie to you all right, I have another
question.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Oh my gosh, come on, it's about really okay.
Speaker 2 (34:58):
This one is I don't like this laugh, so skip the
card you have the password toyour partner's phone and y'all
need to interact.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
I know y'all be watching these videos, so leave
a comment below what do youthink, girl?
You tell me girl um you know soshould you have your partner's
password to their phone.
Let me just say I know hispassword why?
You know, I've known that hispassword's been the same since
we got together no, it hasn'tyes, it has no, it hasn't.
(35:30):
Yes, it has what was it before?
I didn't have a password beforewell, you got one now, and I've
known it for a long time.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
So erica nosy yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
So what do you think about that?
Do you know mine?
Yes, you act like you don'tknow mine sometimes because you
hand me my phone sometimes youchange stuff and I don't know
what you be changing.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
but I I'd be like I know, because the kids I know,
but that's why I'd be like Idon't know what it is.
So here you don't even rememberyour own passwords.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
I know, I lose, I forget.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
That's why I ask because it's like hey, did she
change?
Did she forget again?
Did you change it?
That's like but like my emailpassword or my Apple ID or
something.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
I change it ever so often, but yeah, we have each
other's passcodes.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
What do you feel about that?
I mean, I feel like I don'thave nothing to hide.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
I don't feel like it's what it used to be.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
I don't feel like what do you mean?
Speaker 1 (36:31):
Obviously, we went through the beginning stages of
me finding things I did not liketo see, okay.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
Yeah, I mean, but that's like that's one of those
things you kind of got to growinto.
If you want to be in arelationship, you have to
understand what that means, andI don't think a lot of guys
actually understand what thatmeans, and I didn't.
I was 22, 23.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
He did not.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
And she was 27, 28.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
So I was looking for a whole husband.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
it's a lot to uh, I mean, you got to change your
ways, but I don't think I had,like, I had real relationships,
but they weren't like.
The person I was with ended upmoving away.
You know what I mean.
So, when it comes to being in arelationship where you're there
with that person every, singleday it's a whole different thing
(37:20):
, so I had to get used to that.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
Yeah, so what did you have to change?
Speaker 2 (37:26):
What did I have to change?
I had to be thoughtful, I hadto be.
It's either you're all in it oryou're not, and I had to figure
that out and I had to be.
I don't know, I feel like I hadto.
I went through badrelationships, so it was one of
those.
I have to trust this person andopen up to this person in a way
(37:47):
that I've never done before,and that was hard because I've.
When you come up and you don'teven have, like you have parents
in your life, but you don't,you know what?
Speaker 1 (37:57):
I mean, yeah, I don't have any, like you have parents
in your life, but you don't youknow what I mean.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
I don't have my grandma.
I lived with my grandma from 16on, so I already didn't know
how to communicate.
I'm trying to be with an olderwoman and, uh, I don't know how
to talk about how I feel.
That's something that's hard todo, especially Like I was still
figuring all that out.
I got my first apartment withErica.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
I didn't have none of that.
We lost our first apartmenttogether.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
We ain't going to go there.
Speaker 1 (38:27):
We ain't going to go there, but yeah, I mean like
communication, I feel like isthe biggest, biggest thing, and
we just talked about this toounder the comments on Facebook
and I basically just just Istated and I don't want it to
sound just I, so I can clarifybasically I kind of said
something like you, what was it?
You made a post.
(38:47):
Basically it was talking abouthow men can't communicate, or
men don't want to communicate,or they feel like they can't
communicate.
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
So my post was that a lot of us aren't taught to
communicate and it's been athing to where, like it's
expected for men not to know howto communicate.
I feel like there's a lot ofposts out there that are coming
from women specifically that say, oh, men don't communicate, and
men don't know how tocommunicate, and come to me
(39:15):
healed and all this, this andthis yeah, they don't want a man
that can't communicate.
Basically, they don't wantsomeone who is a project.
Basically, right, I was aproject.
Speaker 1 (39:25):
I'm married, y'all single so basically what I said
I don't care somebody left acomment basically was kind of
like I don't know how, likewhere it was coming from,
basically.
But I just want to make itclear.
What I'm saying is that becauseI basically stated somebody was
(39:46):
saying something like do theyneed to be in a relationship?
I don't know how it got to thatpoint.
What was it Like do you need tobe?
Speaker 2 (39:52):
in a relationship.
Someone said you shouldn't waituntil you're in a relationship
to choose to learn how tocommunicate.
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
And they basically said they didn't want someone
that they have to wait to bebasically good at communicating
and better for the next person.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
But see, I didn't understand.
I understand now, Like I get it, but I also didn't understand
then because, like I didn't know, people felt that way.
You know what I mean.
I don't I don't necessarilyagree or disagree, because
that's how they feel, that's onthem, but I don't necessarily.
I didn't understand it at firstbecause I'd never seen someone
(40:30):
say that I've heard it it wassomething that I was like you
should learn how to communicateon your own.
What if you don't know how?
You have that problem what if?
what if you don't know thatthere's an issue right there?
Right, because no guy is evergoing to tell another guy you
don't know how to communicate.
No one, no guy, has ever saidthat about someone.
(40:52):
I know people who I know, oneperson, one guy.
When they come in a barbershop,I don't think their
communication skills are thegreatest right, but I'm not
going to sit there and tell themyou need to learn how to
communicate.
I'm not going to do that at all.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
It's going to be a woman that tells you that it's
going to be a woman that tellsyou yeah, and I basically stated
, like unfortunately, sometimesthat is the way that it is.
I mean, that's the case for us.
If I think about it, if Ihadn't been as graceful and as
patient and willing to work bothways though, because we both
obviously needed to learn how tocommunicate, or like we needed
(41:30):
to learn how to communicate toeach other not necessarily just
communicate Like there's a wayto get through to me and there's
a way to get through to him.
So for me, I basically statedsometimes, unfortunately, that's
the way it is, though you'regonna get with somebody and they
may not know how to communicatethe best.
You're either gonna give upright and let him go and then,
(41:51):
or you're gonna work through itand try to figure it out if you
want to be really long-term andsolid.
Obviously, if I had given up,he could have met somebody else.
That person could have beenjust like me as I stayed with
him, more graceful, more patientand had a great way of, like, I
guess, learning how tocommunicate together, and then
he would have been great forthat person.
(42:12):
So I'm just saying I understand, like women that maybe don't
want to do that, don't whatever,but personally I feel like I
got just saying I understand,like women, that maybe don't
want to do that, don't whatever.
But personally I feel like Igot lucky because I last you
know what I mean I stayedthrough it, I stuck it out and I
wanted to grow.
So basically, what I statedunder somebody else's comment of
maybe basically them sayingsomething like like you should,
(42:35):
so are you saying like youshould train them, kind of thing
, and I don't know what else,but my reply to that is that
what I'm saying is what I justsaid.
I'm just saying it's a wantingto grow together, it's a
partnership, especially ifyou're married.
You want to grow, you want tolearn how to communicate.
It's a one thing he has to wantto learn to communicate.
(42:55):
It has to go both ways.
We have to meet each other bothways because if we don't, then
it's a one thing he has to wantto learn to communicate.
It has to go both ways.
We have to meet each other bothways, because if we don't then
it's kind of a lost win, like,yeah, I probably would give up
because I'm not going to keeptrying and you're not trying to
meet me halfway.
But I also stated that I thinksometimes women, us women- take
accountability girl takeaccountability.
(43:17):
We make it very difficult for aman to communicate, let alone a
black man to communicate,because they're not raised to do
that.
They're not.
They half the time don't havetwo parents to really look up to
in a relationship nowadays,right and then they're expected
to be this high and mighty,strong guy, tough all the time,
(43:38):
don't show any weakness, noemotion.
I mean, you can't have yourcake and eat it too.
So I feel like women want likethat, and then they don't want a
man with emotion, but then theyget mad that a man's not
communicating and it's just alot.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
She's spinning.
Speaker 1 (43:54):
I'm just saying, take my haircut yeah.
Yeah, I just feel like for usthat's what's worked and don't
get me wrong, we're not perfectLike it has been a long, long,
long journey.
I was never perfect.
I think I sucked atcommunication Actually too, but
(44:15):
you know it's a timing thing.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Facts.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
That's just what I think.
Speaker 2 (44:21):
I I'm gonna tell y'all right now y'all homies in
the streets, ain't gonna bethere when you down.
Speaker 1 (44:26):
Bad my boy, you feel me the girl gonna be there when
you down bad my boy, you'll know, it's the one when that person
creates like a safe space foryou to to communicate, because
he knows I would rather him beopen with me and talk to me
about everything, even if I getupset, so that we can get over
that and move past it and Idon't know how to deal with it
(44:47):
the next time around.
Then for him to not tell meanything, which is still a
working progress, becausethere's still things I know he
feels like he can't tell me.
But but I'm trying, I'm workingon that internally, where I
want to kind of take a moment tolike sit and think before I
respond, or I'm trying to see itfrom his perspective instead of
(45:08):
just mine.
So we're still working on it.
Speaker 2 (45:12):
Yeah, I communicate through text message.
I ain't gonna lie.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (45:15):
Because I need time to register everything I hate it
.
Text message I ain't gonna lie.
Exactly because I need time toregister everything I hate,
because I'm one of those peoplewho I'd rather be quiet than say
something I'm gonna have toapologize for later so you're
quick to react.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Exactly because why you have what?
I have what what do you have?
Speaker 2 (45:31):
what do I have?
Speaker 1 (45:32):
what do you have?
I don't know.
What are you going with?
Speaker 2 (45:34):
this, what do I have?
Speaker 1 (45:35):
angry issues.
Let's be real I have angerissues.
But not physically.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
Emotionally.
I've been told my family hasbipolar disorder.
Right, I have irrationalanxiety.
Those are all things that stemfrom.
Whatever they stem from, whatdo you do?
Do you control it or you don't?
That's it.
Speaker 1 (45:56):
Yeah, what's your advice to men?
What have you been doing towork on that?
Speaker 2 (46:00):
I ain't been doing nothing.
Dog, yes you have.
Speaker 1 (46:02):
What have you been doing?
Speaker 2 (46:02):
almost every night you snitching.
Today, dang, all right.
Speaker 1 (46:06):
Look, I got a journal .
You need to help them.
I got a journal and I've beenwriting every day, say you
journal hold on, I'm talking now.
Speaker 2 (46:16):
I try.
All right, I try.
The one thing you got to do ismake effort.
That's all you can do yeah, youtalk to a therapist, you can do
that but.
I ain't gonna lie.
A lot of y'all ain't got healthinsurance.
I'm calling you out yes, sir, alot of y'all don't have health
insurance.
People who do y'all be scaredto talk to somebody?
Dog, ain't nothing wrong withtalking to somebody oh, but I'll
(46:37):
tell you why.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
I know someone in a marriage that will not go to a
therapist because they said theydon't feel that anybody else
should be in their business.
It should be between them andgod you snitching?
I'm just saying nobody knowswho that is but there's really
men that don't feel like theyshould talk to therapists or
have marriage counseling orwhatnot, because nobody should
(46:59):
be in their business or whatever.
Personally, I think it'shealthy because they're biased.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
Honestly, even if you have a group of guys that you
can talk to, like I go to theshop.
I'll talk to my clients all thetime.
I'll talk to the guys at theshop that I work with.
I'll talk to my friends all thetime, because they should be
able to tell me that I'm wrong.
Right, when I'm cuttingsomebody's hair.
I'm going to tell them okay,this is what I went through.
(47:26):
I went through the same thing,but this is how I handled it.
You can handle it different.
There are other ways, there aredifferent avenues you can go
through, but the way you'regoing through it can lead to
destruction.
Right, Alcohol is going to leadto destruction.
A lot of these other things aregoing to lead to destruction.
If you're intoxicated and youjust so happen to go out because
you're stressed out, whathappens?
(47:48):
You're going to try to cheat.
Speaker 1 (47:50):
That's just what it is.
You're not going to be in yourright mind.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
You got to.
I mean, you just got to figureit out.
You got to talk to somebody.
Somebody who's in your corneror somebody you look at, that's
actually respectable enough togive you the right advice.
Give you the right advice yeah,but that's me, I don't know.
Yeah, I tried to journal.
Speaker 1 (48:11):
I'm married.
I tried one.
I'm not gonna.
I tried one page of journalingand I don't know what it is, but
I cannot get my thoughts onpaper.
I feel like I need to actuallytalk to somebody.
Why, I don't know, I just can't.
It's like it's like jumble,like it's too much.
I feel like I would, I wouldbenefit more from therapy like
one-on-one.
Yeah, like that actually bereally great for me.
(48:32):
I've been, I've actually beenthinking about looking into that
, especially right now with ourinsurance and stuff yeah, you
know, we hey, we got insurance.
Speaker 2 (48:39):
You feel me, because I'm not a journaler, I'm not, I
don't like writing honestly.
Speaker 1 (48:43):
It gives me anxiety and my hand starts hurting and I
don't know how you do it.
Speaker 2 (48:47):
I can't I'm a writer.
I'm an artist.
I know I'm not.
I'm a creator, I'm a creativeperson I'm not it just comes to
me yeah, now slowly and I sortthrough it slowly.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
But I highly recommend it, so I'm proud of
you for doing that.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
You need to sign up for a therapist.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
You know we got insurance.
I've already been thinkingabout it Because I feel like
there's progress individually,but I feel like obviously there
could always be more.
Why not Facts?
Yeah, that's a little bit aboutus.
Anything else you want to?
I?
Speaker 2 (49:21):
don't know.
Speaker 1 (49:22):
Is there anything else that you want to talk about
besides me?
Speaker 2 (49:26):
I don't have nothing to talk about.
I ain't going to lie to you.
Speaker 1 (49:30):
Well, what made you want to make this video?
Speaker 2 (49:35):
Because I think you forgot that I had game Shut up.
So I want you to realize that Ithink you forgot that I had
game Shut up.
So I want you to realize that Ipulled you All right Mic
dropped.
Speaker 1 (49:47):
Whatever?
Speaker 2 (49:50):
All right, that's probably the end of this video.
Speaker 1 (49:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:55):
It's the end of this podcast, the end of this episode
.
Whatever you want to say, youknow like subscribe.
Is there anything else you wantto talk about before we go?
You got one one, one chance no,not really.
Speaker 1 (50:08):
I think that's pretty much it.
If you guys have any questions,don't hesitate to ask.
If you guys have any questionsthat you want us to do, like
another podcast on let us know.
Um, I want to say thank you forwatching even though a few of
you that do watch, we reallyappreciate it.
Share our video for us andwe'll be back with another one
and hopefully we won't take longto come back again.
Speaker 2 (50:30):
So this video will drop around august 2nd.
What's that?
Speaker 1 (50:36):
day I met erica 10 years ago, august 2nd.
What's that day?
Speaker 2 (50:37):
I met Erica 10 years ago, August 2nd.
Speaker 1 (50:41):
But we started dating August 2nd, I mean September
2nd.
Speaker 2 (50:45):
This video dropped August 2nd.
I met Erica 10 years ago, onAugust 2nd.
We started dating in September2nd.
Come on man, it only take amonth to find your wife dog.
All right.
So y'all need to do better,y'all out there in them streets.
God don't like that.
I sound like an uncle right now.
Speaker 1 (51:06):
Yeah, you're old anyways, guys, that'll be it for
today's podcast.
Thank you so much for watchingand shout out to hella awkward
for always having the best shoutout hella, awkward, awkward,
for you know the icebreaker,always powered by Hella, awkward
.
Yeah, there's some good ones inhere.
We're going to talk about nextweek, no we?
Speaker 2 (51:24):
ain't no, we not.
Yes, we are.
Anyways, if you like our newsetup, let us know.
Yeah, let us know If you wantus to go back?
Say no.
Leave it in the comments,because this was Erica's idea.
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Yeah, and hopefully when we move we can have like a
little light in the background.
Speaker 2 (51:43):
You, know she got all these ideas.
She trying to tell y'all toomuch.
Speaker 1 (51:46):
But check it out.
Speaker 2 (51:47):
This is the other half podcast Peace.
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