December 5, 2025 • 12 mins
You Don't Have to Choose: Both-And Success for Overwhelmed Entrepreneurs
Stop believing the lie that success requires sacrifice. In this game-changing episode, Cindy Gordon reveals how to create "both-and" success instead of exhausting either-or choices. Inspired by Steve Houghton's rich routines philosophy, discover how to have business success AND personal fulfillment without the guilt.
In this episode, you'll discover:
- Why either-or thinking is keeping you exhausted and guilty
- The both-and framework that successful entrepreneurs secretly use
- How to create "rich routines" that feed multiple life areas simultaneously
- Practical swaps to turn either-or choices into both-and solutions
- The 15-minute morning routine that hits everything without overwhelm
- Why integration beats balance every time
- How to dissolve guilt by designing days that count twice
- The boundary paradox of both-and success
Perfect for: Female entrepreneurs tired of choosing between business success and personal life, parents who feel guilty about work-life balance, and anyone exhausted by the myth that success requires sacrifice.
Key insight: "The most successful people don't make false choices. They create systems that give them both."
Join 1,500+ entrepreneurs learning both-and strategies through Cindy's weekly Reality Check newsletter, and discover how The Growth Collective members design rich routines for just $1 a day.
Resources mentioned:
- The Both-And Framework
- Rich Routines Integration Method
- The Growth Collective Membership
- Weekly Reality Check Newsletter
Stop choosing. Start integrating. Your both-and life is waiting.
🎯 You don't have to figure this out alone! The Growth Collective is your $1/day business support community with weekly office hours, strategic frameworks, and entrepreneurs who get it. Less than your coffee, more than a mastermind. Details at https://exclusivelycindy.thrivecart.com/the-growth-collective/
💡 Don't forget to subscribe for more quick productivity tips for overwhelmed business owners and female entrepreneurs!
💌 Join 1,400+ entrepreneurs getting exclusive overwhelm solutions and productivity strategies straight to their inbox - sign up now! https://cindygordon.myflodesk.com/countmein
Connect with Cindy Gordon - Reality Check Method Coach for Overwhelmed Entrepreneurs:
- Website: ExclusivelyCindy.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exclusivelycindy/
- YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@cindygordon
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Sometimes the universe keepssending you the same message
until you finally pay attention.
Last January, I was at amastermind event and a peer said
something that stopped me in mytracks.
She said, Cindy, you need tostop trying to achieve work life
balance.
It doesn't exist.
What you need is actually worklife integration.
I thought about it for about aday, wrote it down, then got
(00:23):
busy and forgot about it.
But you know what?
This theme keeps recurring.
It actually even came upyesterday in my 11 Z's coffee
chat with other entrepreneurs,and I've been diving into Steve
Houghton's work on richroutines, which essentially is
the same thing.
Then there's this conversationthat really drove it home for
me.
I was talking to another femaleentrepreneur at a different
(00:45):
event and she said somethingthat felt like she was reading
my mind.
She said, I feel like I'mconstantly choosing between
being a good business owner or agood mom, successful or present,
or wealthy or happy.
And then I realized we'veliterally all been sold on the
lie.
That success requires sacrificeand that you have to choose.
(01:09):
But what if I told you that Ithink that is complete bullshit?
What if the most successfulpeople aren't actually choosing
either or, but they are creatingboth And.
Hi, I'm Cindy Gordon and you arelistening to The Overwhelmed
Entrepreneur.
After building and sellingmultiple businesses while
raising a crazy, busy family, Ican tell you that the secret
(01:30):
isn't balance.
It is indeed integration, andthat's exactly what we are
unpacking today.
So here's how we've beenprogrammed to think about
success, especially as womenentrepreneurs.
They tell us that you can eitherbe successful or have a good
life.
You can make money or be a goodparent.
You can grow your business ortake care of yourself.
(01:51):
You can be strategic orspontaneous.
You can be professional orauthentic.
Does this sound familiar?
This either or thinking isliterally exhausting, and the
kicker is, it's not even true.
So I told you, I've been divinginto Steve Houghton's work on
rich routines and successfulhabits, and what struck me is
that the most successful peopledon't make these false choices.
(02:13):
They create systems that givethem both.
They build routines that arerich in every sense of life.
So we're talking aboutfinancially, emotionally, in
their relationships.
So let me reality check this foryou because I know what you're
thinking.
You're probably saying easy foryou to say Cindy, but I
literally don't have time forboth.
(02:35):
Alright, that's fair.
But here is what I've learned.
It's not about having more time,it's about designing your time
differently.
When I was in pure hustle mode,I thought that success meant
choosing business overeverything.
I am embarrassed to admit that Ihave skipped family dinners for
client calls, canceled workoutsfor deadlines, put off friend
(02:56):
dates indefinitely, and you knowwhat?
My business did indeed grow.
But I was miserable.
And that misery eventuallyaffected my business too.
It all catches up.
The breakthrough came when Istopped thinking business or
life and started thinkingbusiness and life integrated.
Here's how I design my days forboth and success mixed in, and
(03:18):
this is something that we workon extensively inside the Growth
Collective.
By the way, if you like to deepdive into this with other
entrepreneurs who actually getit, it's literally a dollar a
day and we meet weekly on Zoomto discuss all types of topics
like this.
So instead of separatecompartments for work and life,
I create what I call richroutines.
(03:40):
Practices that feed multipleareas simultaneously.
So here's an example.
Let's call it the walkingmeeting.
So the old way is you sit atyour desk for a call or go for a
walk later.
So what if we combine them, theboth and way walking meetings
that combine movement, freshair, and business growth.
Another example, the familybusiness hour.
(04:02):
So the old way you work alone inan office or you spend time with
your kids.
What if we looked at it from theboth and way?
So let's call it Fridayafternoon, CEO lessons, where I
involve my kids in ageappropriate business decisions.
I'm combining them.
The next example is calledsocial content creation.
So the old way we create contentalone or hang out with
(04:26):
entrepreneur friends, let's lookat it from the both and way
monthly content creation partieswhere we work together.
So do you see the pattern?
It's not about doing less, it'sabout doing things that count
twice.
We are combining them.
Let's talk about morningroutines, which is always a fan
(04:46):
favorite topic on this podcast.
I wanna talk about them becausethis is where Steve Houghton's
Rich Routines concept reallyclicked.
For me, most productivity advicetells you to wake up at 5:00 AM
and have an elaborate two hourroutine.
But that's either or thinkingeither you're a morning routine
person or you're not.
(05:07):
Here's my both and approach.
My morning routine is about 15minutes long.
That's it.
But in those 15 minutes, I hiteverything gratitude practice
while making coffee.
So I'm combining mindset and mycaffeine fuel.
I do a quick priority checkwhile the kids eat breakfast, so
planning and presents.
(05:27):
I have a five minute stretchwhile reviewing my daily
calendar there.
I'm combining body and business.
Yes, it's not super Instagramworthy.
It's not perfect.
But it's rich because it honorsall parts of my life and not
just business.
The game changer concept herethat really resonated from
exploring rich routines is thatthe highest performers don't
(05:50):
compartmentalize.
They integrate.
They don't have work likebalance.
They have work life integration.
Think about it, taking clientsto your favorite restaurant,
your combining business andpleasure hiring team members who
become friends.
Work and relationships, creatingproducts that solve your own
problems.
That's service and self-care.
(06:12):
Building a business around yourlife, not despite it.
That's success and satisfactionlast week in our email community
and PS, if you are not gettingthese weekly emails yet,
seriously, what are you waitingfor?
There is a link in the shownotes.
I need you to join the over 1500other.
Entrepreneurs who use my tipsweekly.
(06:33):
But last week, one memberreplied to me and shared how she
completely restructured herbusiness model to include her
love of travel.
Now she runs retreats inbeautiful locations.
She combined business andadventure, and I think that is a
perfect example of integration,here's something we also need to
(06:53):
talk about, the guilt.
Oh my gosh.
The guilt.
There is guilt in everything.
When you're working, you feelguilty about not being with your
family.
When you're with your family,you feel guilty about not
working.
When you're resting, you feelguilty about not being
productive.
When you're being productive,you feel guilty about not
resting.
(07:14):
The both and approach dissolvesthis because you're not choosing
one over the other.
You're creating integratedexperiences that honor multiple
values simultaneously.
I used to feel guilty abouttaking a lunch break.
Now I have lunch with potentialcollaborators.
I'm eating and networking at thesame time.
On my phone, yes, but no guilt,just richness, so let me give
(07:38):
you some specific swaps that youcould try this week.
So instead of scrolling socialmedia mindlessly or working, try
engaging meaningfully on socialas market research instead of
exercise or businessdevelopment.
Try walking while listening tobusiness podcasts instead of
family time or content creation,try documenting real moments
(08:01):
that become authentic content.
Because everything is content.
They say, instead of self-careor productivity, try batching
tasks and focus sprints with alittle bit of built in recovery.
Instead of networking or familyobligations, try bringing family
to casual networking events orhosting gatherings.
The key is asking yourself, howcan this serve multiple purposes
(08:25):
without diminishing any of them?
And let's address the elephantin the room, which is money,
because often we think we haveto choose between making money
and being happy.
We have to choose betweenwealth.
And values, but here's what richroutines really means.
It's about creating wealth inevery dimension.
(08:45):
Financial, wealth, time, wealth,relationship, wealth, health,
wealth.
Experience wealth.
When you design your businessand life for the both end
concept, you stop trading oneform of wealth for the other and
you build them simultaneously.
You might think that both andmeans having no boundaries, but
actually it's the opposite bothand requires better boundaries
(09:09):
because you are beingintentional about integration.
You're not available 24 7.
You are available strategically.
You are not doing everything.
You are doing things that alignwith multiple values.
You are not saying yes to allopportunities.
You are saying yes to richopportunities, and that's
exactly what we dive into duringour Growth Collective office
(09:30):
hours.
How do you know if something isa rich opportunity or just
another obligation?
How do you set boundaries thatcreate more freedom and not
less?
We attack those things duringoffice hours each and every
week.
Here's what I want you toremember from today.
You don't need to choose betweensuccess and satisfaction, wealth
(09:51):
and wellbeing and business andlife that's outdated, that
either or thinking keeps youexhausted and feeling guilty.
Most successful entrepreneurshave figured out the both and
secret.
They create rich routines thatfeed multiple areas of life.
They integrate instead ofcompartmentalize, and they
design their days to counttwice.
(10:12):
This week I challenge you tofind one place where you're
making an either or choice, andturn it into a both and
solution.
Just one.
Find just one.
Maybe it's combining yourworkout with a business learning
opportunity.
Maybe it's turning date nightinto a mastermind with your
entrepreneur partner.
Maybe it's involving your kidsand your business in age
(10:33):
appropriate ways.
If this resonated with you, Iwant you to take action today.
First, get on my email list ifyou are not already there.
Link in the show notes to joinover 1500 other entrepreneurs
who get weekly strategies thatactually work.
And second, consider joining theGrowth Collective you get
support in designing your ownriches routine.
(10:55):
People who understand thechallenge.
You don't have to choose betweenbeing successful and being
happy.
You can have both.
You deserve both.
And now you know how to createboth.
Until next time.
This is me, Cindy, justreminding you that when
everything feels urgent, nothingreally is, especially when
you're creating both and successinstead of either or.
(11:17):
Exhaustion.
And of course, remember you'vegot this.
Speaker (11:21):
Thanks for spending these few minutes with me today.
Remember, overwhelm isn'tpermanent.
It's simply your brain's way ofsaying pause and take a little
reality check.
If this was helpful, you'll lovemy weekly email tips where I
share the systems that keep meand hundreds of other
entrepreneurs on Track Link inthe show notes.
If you got value in today'sepisode, please share it with
(11:42):
another entrepreneur who needsthat reminder.
If you're loving the show, I'dbe so grateful if you could
leave me a quick review.
It helps other overwhelmedentrepreneurs find us.
Make sure you hit subscribe soyou never miss your weekly dose
of clarity.
For more resources and toconnect with me, visit
exclusively cindy.com.
Until next time, remember you'vegot this.
Sometimes the universe keepssending you the same message
until you finally pay attention.
Last January, I was at amastermind event and a peer said
something that stopped me in mytracks.
She said, Cindy, you need tostop trying to achieve work life
balance.
It doesn't exist.
What you need is actually worklife integration.
I thought about it for about aday, wrote it down, then got
(00:23):
busy and forgot about it.
But you know what?
This theme keeps recurring.
It actually even came upyesterday in my 11 Z's coffee
chat with other entrepreneurs,and I've been diving into Steve
Houghton's work on richroutines, which essentially is
the same thing.
Then there's this conversationthat really drove it home for
me.
I was talking to another femaleentrepreneur at a different
(00:45):
event and she said somethingthat felt like she was reading
my mind.
She said, I feel like I'mconstantly choosing between
being a good business owner or agood mom, successful or present,
or wealthy or happy.
And then I realized we'veliterally all been sold on the
lie.
That success requires sacrificeand that you have to choose.
(01:09):
But what if I told you that Ithink that is complete bullshit?
What if the most successfulpeople aren't actually choosing
either or, but they are creatingboth And.
Hi, I'm Cindy Gordon and you arelistening to The Overwhelmed
Entrepreneur.
After building and sellingmultiple businesses while
raising a crazy, busy family, Ican tell you that the secret
(01:30):
isn't balance.
It is indeed integration, andthat's exactly what we are
unpacking today.
So here's how we've beenprogrammed to think about
success, especially as womenentrepreneurs.
They tell us that you can eitherbe successful or have a good
life.
You can make money or be a goodparent.
You can grow your business ortake care of yourself.
(01:51):
You can be strategic orspontaneous.
You can be professional orauthentic.
Does this sound familiar?
This either or thinking isliterally exhausting, and the
kicker is, it's not even true.
So I told you, I've been divinginto Steve Houghton's work on
rich routines and successfulhabits, and what struck me is
that the most successful peopledon't make these false choices.
(02:13):
They create systems that givethem both.
They build routines that arerich in every sense of life.
So we're talking aboutfinancially, emotionally, in
their relationships.
So let me reality check this foryou because I know what you're
thinking.
You're probably saying easy foryou to say Cindy, but I
literally don't have time forboth.
(02:35):
Alright, that's fair.
But here is what I've learned.
It's not about having more time,it's about designing your time
differently.
When I was in pure hustle mode,I thought that success meant
choosing business overeverything.
I am embarrassed to admit that Ihave skipped family dinners for
client calls, canceled workoutsfor deadlines, put off friend
(02:56):
dates indefinitely, and you knowwhat?
My business did indeed grow.
But I was miserable.
And that misery eventuallyaffected my business too.
It all catches up.
The breakthrough came when Istopped thinking business or
life and started thinkingbusiness and life integrated.
Here's how I design my days forboth and success mixed in, and
(03:18):
this is something that we workon extensively inside the Growth
Collective.
By the way, if you like to deepdive into this with other
entrepreneurs who actually getit, it's literally a dollar a
day and we meet weekly on Zoomto discuss all types of topics
like this.
So instead of separatecompartments for work and life,
I create what I call richroutines.
(03:40):
Practices that feed multipleareas simultaneously.
So here's an example.
Let's call it the walkingmeeting.
So the old way is you sit atyour desk for a call or go for a
walk later.
So what if we combine them, theboth and way walking meetings
that combine movement, freshair, and business growth.
Another example, the familybusiness hour.
(04:02):
So the old way you work alone inan office or you spend time with
your kids.
What if we looked at it from theboth and way?
So let's call it Fridayafternoon, CEO lessons, where I
involve my kids in ageappropriate business decisions.
I'm combining them.
The next example is calledsocial content creation.
So the old way we create contentalone or hang out with
(04:26):
entrepreneur friends, let's lookat it from the both and way
monthly content creation partieswhere we work together.
So do you see the pattern?
It's not about doing less, it'sabout doing things that count
twice.
We are combining them.
Let's talk about morningroutines, which is always a fan
(04:46):
favorite topic on this podcast.
I wanna talk about them becausethis is where Steve Houghton's
Rich Routines concept reallyclicked.
For me, most productivity advicetells you to wake up at 5:00 AM
and have an elaborate two hourroutine.
But that's either or thinkingeither you're a morning routine
person or you're not.
(05:07):
Here's my both and approach.
My morning routine is about 15minutes long.
That's it.
But in those 15 minutes, I hiteverything gratitude practice
while making coffee.
So I'm combining mindset and mycaffeine fuel.
I do a quick priority checkwhile the kids eat breakfast, so
planning and presents.
(05:27):
I have a five minute stretchwhile reviewing my daily
calendar there.
I'm combining body and business.
Yes, it's not super Instagramworthy.
It's not perfect.
But it's rich because it honorsall parts of my life and not
just business.
The game changer concept herethat really resonated from
exploring rich routines is thatthe highest performers don't
(05:50):
compartmentalize.
They integrate.
They don't have work likebalance.
They have work life integration.
Think about it, taking clientsto your favorite restaurant,
your combining business andpleasure hiring team members who
become friends.
Work and relationships, creatingproducts that solve your own
problems.
That's service and self-care.
(06:12):
Building a business around yourlife, not despite it.
That's success and satisfactionlast week in our email community
and PS, if you are not gettingthese weekly emails yet,
seriously, what are you waitingfor?
There is a link in the shownotes.
I need you to join the over 1500other.
Entrepreneurs who use my tipsweekly.
(06:33):
But last week, one memberreplied to me and shared how she
completely restructured herbusiness model to include her
love of travel.
Now she runs retreats inbeautiful locations.
She combined business andadventure, and I think that is a
perfect example of integration,here's something we also need to
(06:53):
talk about, the guilt.
Oh my gosh.
The guilt.
There is guilt in everything.
When you're working, you feelguilty about not being with your
family.
When you're with your family,you feel guilty about not
working.
When you're resting, you feelguilty about not being
productive.
When you're being productive,you feel guilty about not
resting.
(07:14):
The both and approach dissolvesthis because you're not choosing
one over the other.
You're creating integratedexperiences that honor multiple
values simultaneously.
I used to feel guilty abouttaking a lunch break.
Now I have lunch with potentialcollaborators.
I'm eating and networking at thesame time.
On my phone, yes, but no guilt,just richness, so let me give
(07:38):
you some specific swaps that youcould try this week.
So instead of scrolling socialmedia mindlessly or working, try
engaging meaningfully on socialas market research instead of
exercise or businessdevelopment.
Try walking while listening tobusiness podcasts instead of
family time or content creation,try documenting real moments
(08:01):
that become authentic content.
Because everything is content.
They say, instead of self-careor productivity, try batching
tasks and focus sprints with alittle bit of built in recovery.
Instead of networking or familyobligations, try bringing family
to casual networking events orhosting gatherings.
The key is asking yourself, howcan this serve multiple purposes
(08:25):
without diminishing any of them?
And let's address the elephantin the room, which is money,
because often we think we haveto choose between making money
and being happy.
We have to choose betweenwealth.
And values, but here's what richroutines really means.
It's about creating wealth inevery dimension.
(08:45):
Financial, wealth, time, wealth,relationship, wealth, health,
wealth.
Experience wealth.
When you design your businessand life for the both end
concept, you stop trading oneform of wealth for the other and
you build them simultaneously.
You might think that both andmeans having no boundaries, but
actually it's the opposite bothand requires better boundaries
(09:09):
because you are beingintentional about integration.
You're not available 24 7.
You are available strategically.
You are not doing everything.
You are doing things that alignwith multiple values.
You are not saying yes to allopportunities.
You are saying yes to richopportunities, and that's
exactly what we dive into duringour Growth Collective office
(09:30):
hours.
How do you know if something isa rich opportunity or just
another obligation?
How do you set boundaries thatcreate more freedom and not
less?
We attack those things duringoffice hours each and every
week.
Here's what I want you toremember from today.
You don't need to choose betweensuccess and satisfaction, wealth
(09:51):
and wellbeing and business andlife that's outdated, that
either or thinking keeps youexhausted and feeling guilty.
Most successful entrepreneurshave figured out the both and
secret.
They create rich routines thatfeed multiple areas of life.
They integrate instead ofcompartmentalize, and they
design their days to counttwice.
(10:12):
This week I challenge you tofind one place where you're
making an either or choice, andturn it into a both and
solution.
Just one.
Find just one.
Maybe it's combining yourworkout with a business learning
opportunity.
Maybe it's turning date nightinto a mastermind with your
entrepreneur partner.
Maybe it's involving your kidsand your business in age
(10:33):
appropriate ways.
If this resonated with you, Iwant you to take action today.
First, get on my email list ifyou are not already there.
Link in the show notes to joinover 1500 other entrepreneurs
who get weekly strategies thatactually work.
And second, consider joining theGrowth Collective you get
support in designing your ownriches routine.
(10:55):
People who understand thechallenge.
You don't have to choose betweenbeing successful and being
happy.
You can have both.
You deserve both.
And now you know how to createboth.
Until next time.
This is me, Cindy, justreminding you that when
everything feels urgent, nothingreally is, especially when
you're creating both and successinstead of either or.
(11:17):
Exhaustion.
And of course, remember you'vegot this.
Speaker (11:21):
Thanks for spending these few minutes with me today.
Remember, overwhelm isn'tpermanent.
It's simply your brain's way ofsaying pause and take a little
reality check.
If this was helpful, you'll lovemy weekly email tips where I
share the systems that keep meand hundreds of other
entrepreneurs on Track Link inthe show notes.
If you got value in today'sepisode, please share it with
(11:42):
another entrepreneur who needsthat reminder.
If you're loving the show, I'dbe so grateful if you could
leave me a quick review.
It helps other overwhelmedentrepreneurs find us.
Make sure you hit subscribe soyou never miss your weekly dose
of clarity.
For more resources and toconnect with me, visit
exclusively cindy.com.
Until next time, remember you'vegot this.
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