March 30, 2025 • 22 mins
Have you ever caught yourself putting on a polished, professional voice that doesn't quite match who you really are? That's exactly where I found myself with this podcast—trying to sound "official" instead of authentic. Today's episode marks a turning point as I strip away the facade and speak directly from my heart about the imposter syndrome that affects 70% of us.
Growing up feeling invisible left me with a deep-seated belief that I needed to overcompensate, to give 150% when 100% would be enough. I've carried this pattern through life, constantly trying to prove my worthiness—even when recording this podcast. Through vulnerability and honesty, I share how this tendency to hide behind perfectionism actually disconnects us from the very people we hope to reach.
The Plus One Theory is about making small, intentional steps forward while being kind to yourself along the way. My plus one this week? Showing up as my real, unpolished self. I also share my vision for the upcoming Plus One Theory book, including an invitation for you to potentially share your story. Whether you're battling self-doubt, feeling stuck, or simply tired of wearing a mask, this episode offers permission to embrace your authentic self—because who you truly are is beautiful, worthy, and exactly what the world needs.
For those interested in sharing their stories or connecting further, email me at support@plusonepublishing.com or visit pamedwyer.com to join my community. Remember: your past doesn't define you—it prepares you for the meaningful impact only you can make.
Be a Guest on The Plus One Theory Podcast!
Are you someone who believes in the power of kindness, resilience, and intentional growth? Do you have a story about how small, meaningful steps have made a difference in your life or career?
I’d love to invite you to share your journey on The Plus One Theory Podcast!
This podcast is all about exploring how we can apply the Plus One Theory to create ripples of positivity and purpose in our personal and professional lives. I’m especially excited to feature guests who work in heart-centered careers—nurses, teachers, counselors, nonprofit leaders, caregivers, or anyone who dedicates their energy to helping others.
Your story could inspire listeners who are navigating their own challenges and looking for ways to take that next small step forward. Whether you’ve used kindness to overcome adversity, found strength in vulnerability, or applied intentional action to make an impact in your community, I want to hear from you!
Interested? Here’s How to Reach Out:
- Email me with a brief introduction about yourself and your story.
- Let me know how the Plus One Theory has played a role in your life or career.
Let’s work together to inspire others and create a ripple effect of kindness and resilience. I can’t wait to hear your story!
Share this with someone who inspires you...
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Hey y'all.
It's Pam Dwyer.
If you're new here, welcome tothe Plus One Theory podcast.
I'm so glad you're listeningtoday.
Let me quickly explain what thePlus One Theory is all about.
It's the idea that when you'redoing your best, whatever that
looks like today, you can alwaysadd just one small intentional
(00:26):
step to move forward.
It's not about pushing yourselfto burnout.
It's about growing with purpose, being kind to yourself and
learning how small shifts canmake a big impact over time.
Also, just a quick disclaimerI'm not a therapist, a doctor or
(00:46):
a clinical expert.
I'm just someone who's beenthrough some hard stuff, done a
lot of healing, and now I get toshare what I've learned with
you.
So always take what serves youand leave the rest.
You and leave the rest.
(01:07):
And if a friend sent you thisepisode or you're tuning in for
the first time, you've come tothe right place.
Today we're diving intosomething that hits close to
home what happens when we startto lose our real selves while
trying to sound or act likesomeone we're not.
So today I am challenged bythose that love me and know me
(01:29):
to try and sound more authentic.
I've been trying too hard, Ibelieve.
So this is my confession to allof you today I've been using a
voice that doesn't really soundlike me, trying to sound
official and polished, but it'sjust not coming across as
authentic.
I mean, I think it is.
(01:50):
It's just.
I think those that know me wantto hear more from my heart, and
so I'm going to do that fromnow on, and I'm truly sorry that
I was so, I don't know, nervousor just those old feelings I
had from my childhood, growingup.
I just felt unworthy.
You know I wanted to sound asprofessional and polished as
(02:12):
possible, but the plus onetheory it deserves a real voice
because the message matters andthat's the whole reason for me
doing this, shouting from themountaintop, so to speak, about
how worthy we all are, howworthy you are, and if it
(02:33):
reaches just one person andhelps them realize that, then
the world's a lot better,because the more of us that feel
worthy and confident andrealizes what our true strengths
are, we can share them withothers, and that's what I'm
doing, that's what I'm trying todo.
So I hope that each of theseepisodes touch your heart and
(02:58):
hopefully helps you think ofsomeone that could hear the
message.
You know we all need to worktogether as a team to help all
those that need us.
That's what we're here to do.
So what's something in your liferight now that you're over
polishing?
Where are you afraid to just beyourself?
(03:20):
So I realized what I wasdescribing.
It's called.
There is a name for it.
It's called the impostersyndrome, and most people know
what that is.
It's like when you feel like a,like a fraud.
Even when you're qualified andpassionate about what you're
doing, sharing or saying orbeing, we sometimes feel like
(03:44):
we're not worthy of therecognition or of people hearing
us or listening to us.
Did you know that 70% I think Iread about this once, 70% of
people experience experiencethis imposter syndrome at some
point.
That's from Journal journal ofbehavioral science.
(04:06):
It hits hardest when you'redoing vulnerable, meaningful
work, and women especially tendto feel this when they care
deeply.
So have you ever downplayed yourgifts because you thought you
weren't enough?
Your gifts because you thoughtyou weren't enough?
(04:27):
I know we can all remember atime when that's happened.
I've even done it.
I have to tell you this, I'veeven.
I just thought of this.
I've even done it.
I'm very familiar with how a carengine works and when it needs
to have service.
But it seems like every time Igo and have the oil changed or a
repair done, it's usuallysomeone talking to me like I
(04:50):
don't know anything and so I cancorrect them.
I can let them know yes, I'maware of that, and what about
this, this, this and this?
But instead I find that I justdownplay it, my experience or my
knowledge.
I downplay it so that they feelbetter about what they are
(05:10):
telling me.
So I know it sounds crazy, buta lot of times I downplay what I
know to be true, and I'm sure alot of you have too.
(05:42):
So lately, what I tend to do andthe plus one is just instilled.
It's instilled in me so deeplythat it's hard sometimes for me
to not go above and beyond andgo that extra mile.
Or instead of 100%, I want togive 150%.
And through lots of therapy, Irealized that that's my way of
of saying okay, I know I'm notworthy enough to be doing this
task and I know that I I don'tfeel like I'm qualified.
So what I'm going to do is goabove and beyond like do 150% so
(06:05):
that you or anyone else willbelieve that I'm worthy to be
doing or that I'm worthlistening to or worth believing
in my skill or in my behavior orin my advice, whatever that is,
but it's because of the way Igrew up.
I grew up being invisible, Igrew up not being seen or heard,
(06:30):
and so therefore, I willstruggle with that for the rest
of my life.
But I continue to educatemyself, to learn to watch others
, to love others, and when theydon't want to let me love them,
I try to find out why you know,and then somehow somehow let
them know you're not letting mein because of this.
(06:54):
I know what you're doingbecause I did it.
So, yes, I am qualified and Iam worthy to share my
experiences with you, andhopefully my prayer is that you
can glean anything from thesestories and apply it to your own
life.
But even today, I tend to nottake my own advice to be real,
(07:18):
to remember all that I'velearned with life choices and
life disasters, and if we're notcareful, we can be in a endless
pattern of failure because weforget what we've learned or we
just don't want to see what thetruth is.
(07:40):
I mean my whole the book that Iwrote from the Piney Woods was
a really scary thing for me.
I mean, first of all, justputting my raw journal notes
from counseling out for theworld to read about.
Those journal notes are my veryprivate feelings, my honest,
(08:02):
raw feelings and folks.
I can't tell you enough howimportant journaling is because
I would read them over and over,even a year or two down the
road.
I'd read what I was feeling andthinking at a year ago so I can
remember now.
Okay, I'm thinking this becauseof that.
(08:23):
So it's a great reference forgrowth, because we're never
completely cured healed, notcured but we're never completely
healed.
We're healed enough where wecan tell ourselves okay, I
realize what I'm doing right nowand I need to stop it.
(08:44):
So for the last week or so I'vebeen feeling pretty discouraged
because there are people thathave been there for me and they
continue to be there for me,supporting me mentally,
financially, and they believe inme and my message that I want
(09:05):
to just shout out to the worldthat your past doesn't define
you, it prepares you and that'simportant, especially if you use
the plus one theory alongsideit.
I'm in the process of writing anew book the plus one theory
and right now I'm at astandstill.
I'll be honest with all of youit's very expensive to invest in
(09:29):
publishing a book, and that'snot the hardest part.
That's the critical part thatyou must do to put it out there
so people can understand whatthe message is by reading it or
listening to it.
But it's a great investmentfinancially and my husband,
bless his heart, has been sosupportive in that.
(09:50):
But the last thing I want isfor this just to be an expensive
hobby.
I want to put it in front ofevery person possible that needs
to read it.
It's not for everyoneespecially memoirs or
autobiographies or self-helptype books but it is for people
(10:12):
out there that need it.
But there's some people thatjust don't want to read
something like that, and that'sokay.
But I want to put it out therefor those that can benefit from
the message.
And so I'm struggling right nowbecause I feel I feel stuck, and
this podcast is for people thatfeel stuck.
(10:34):
So I've been listening to eachepisode, from episode one on to
this one, which is episode 16.
And I heard what my family andfriends were hearing.
I'm like, wow, I do sound veryprofessional.
I could get a job at a radiostation.
So now I'm being real andthat's what I'm going to do,
(10:58):
whether I pronounce a word,properly or not.
I'm just going to speak from myheart, and hopefully you can
relate, and from what I'msharing.
And so what I'm going to sharetoday is you are worthy.
You are worthy of everythingthat you can possibly dream of,
and there's always a way If youapply plus one, like that's what
(11:19):
I'm having to do right now.
I'm trying to figure out.
So how can I not burden myhusband and my family
financially to accomplish thisbook, to get this book published
?
The plus one theory.
And so I'm educating myself,I'm going out there and I'm
learning.
I'm learning so much.
(11:39):
There's a lot of things thatauthors can do, especially when
they're not, you know,financially set, but they have a
message or a book in them, astory they want to get out there
, and the best way you can dothat is there is crowdfunding,
it's called, and a lot of otheroptions out there.
And so I'm educating myself,I'm trying to learn.
(12:02):
It's just like when I firstpublished From the Piney Woods.
What a disaster that was, withmy impatient self.
I published that book andwinged it, and it was not what
it should have been, and becauseof that, the message was not as
powerful as it could have been.
So, tim and I felt like themessage was important enough and
(12:27):
we invested in getting itprofessionally edited,
professionally published, andnow I have people in my life
that I'm so thankful for that Ihave met through this whole
effort, this whole process.
They matter to me, they'reimportant, and I know that this
message is going to succeed.
(12:49):
The book's going to succeed.
It's going to be read by peoplethat need it the most.
So my story, my voice, my truth,that's what people connect with
, and I need to remember that.
Or you can remind me, please,please, submit reviews or
(13:11):
suggestions.
Even.
I am all about growing from theadvice of people that are
listening, because if I'm notdoing this well or not doing it
in a way that helps people grow,then I need to learn how I can
fix it.
So please share with me, sharewith your friends.
So this week I'm choosing toshow up more real.
(13:34):
That's my plus one this week,and why don't you share your
plus one with me?
By the way, that brings me tomy next little idea, my book,
the Plus One Theory.
I've been changing the strategyof it for the message, for the
theory to you know, and the bestway people relate to an idea or
(13:55):
a concept or a theory is withresearch and with proof and how
they can apply it to their ownlives.
You know, what can they takeaway and use?
And so I came up with this idea.
I think that I'm going to talkwith lots of people.
I'm offering a chance forpeople to share their story and
(14:21):
I'm going to put it in my book.
I'm going to share real lifestories of people that you know
succeeded in life, but it wasreally difficult.
Maybe the journey was tough,maybe it didn't end up the way
they thought it would, you know,but if they have a story they
want to share with the world, Iam happy to put it in my book.
So if you want to sharesomething with me and I can
(14:44):
write about it and include it inmy book, we can use real names
or we can use pretend names.
It's up to you, but if you sharethat with me or you feel led to
do that, please reach out to me.
You can email me at support atplus one publishing dot com, and
(15:06):
that plus P-L-U-S, the numberone publishing
P-U-B-L-I-S-H-I-N-G dot com.
Email me and just let me know.
Yes, pam, I have a story that Iwould love to share with you
and we can do that together overcoffee, tea, a meal.
I can come to your, jump onyour hamster wheel and meet you
(15:30):
at your work, meet you at one ofyour kids games.
I would love to cheer them on.
However, we can communicatewith one another, or maybe even
just over the phone.
All right, so what can we takeaway from this?
Today, you have to admit yourfear.
That alone deflates it.
So that's what I've been doingfor myself all week.
(15:52):
Is my fear?
My fear is failing you, failingall those people that really
need to hear that their pastdoesn't define them, that if
they messed up, if they didsomething horrible, they can
move beyond that.
They can use it and use it forstepping stones to make a bigger
(16:16):
impact in this world.
Learn how to show kindness,learn how to give kindness.
That's what empowers us, that'swhat gives us power, that
energizes us when we are kindand be willing to be seen.
Let people see the imperfectyou, because then they're going
(16:37):
to open up and feel like theycan relate to you more.
And, of course, always plus one, it One small step closer to
being yourself and loving it.
Loving yourself, loving all thethings that make you different,
because that's who you trulyare, and you can celebrate the
messy, messy middle.
(16:58):
That's where the growth lies.
We grow from our mistakes.
We learn from our mistakes.
We become stronger, wiser andmore able to help others.
So who are you when you're nottrying to impress anyone?
When you're not trying toimpress anyone, maybe when
you're sitting alone somewhereoutside having a meal or just
(17:28):
laying in the bed at nighttrying to get to sleep?
Who are you at that moment whenno one can hear you, no one can
see you?
That's who you truly are andthat's who we deserve to see and
know.
That's who I want to know.
I want to know the real you andit's who we deserve to see and
know.
That's who I want to know.
I want to know the real you,and it's only fair that I give
you the real me, and I have been.
It's just I don't know.
I've been trying to be betterthan what I felt I was.
(17:51):
So I promise no more podcastingbehind a mask.
You're just going to get thereal, pam, and so let's do this
together.
Let's do life real not polished, not perfect, but real, because
who we are is beautiful.
So share this with someonewho's battling self-doubt and
sometimes we battle itself-doubt and no one realizes
(18:15):
it.
No one realizes it.
They just think that we'remoody or in a bad mood or we're
just not approachable orvulnerable or open for
connection.
And all we have to do is justfeel better about ourselves and
forgive ourselves if we must.
If we need to do that, we mustforgive ourselves first so that
(18:35):
we can forgive others.
So you can join my email list atpamedwyercom to stay connected.
I know everyone hates gettingemails out, but I promise it's
the best way for us to stayconnected.
There's so many social mediaoutlets y'all.
I don't know if any of you relyon social media to grow your
(18:57):
business or your company or yourjob.
That man.
There's so many and people alluse.
Some people use Instagram, somepeople love Facebook, some
people hate Facebook and TikTokdon't get me started.
I haven't even I can't evenbegin to think about getting on
TikTok, but people tell me thatit's very useful.
But everyone emails Everyone.
(19:20):
I've never known anyone not tohave an email address.
So if you share that with me,all I'm going to do is share
when I write about any of thesethings.
The plus one theory you canlearn about the process of my
writing.
You can learn when we plan torelease the book and celebrate
(19:42):
it.
You can celebrate with me andgrow with me.
It's very exciting, and so, onthis journey, maybe you have a
book in you, maybe you have astory you want to share, so you
can learn from my mistakes.
That would make me very happyAlso.
So pamedwyercom is the way tostay connected with me.
Just just put that emailaddress in there and make sure
(20:05):
that I'm not spammed.
Don't spam, pam.
Oh, I just made that up, butanyway, I do have the special
announcement.
I mentioned it briefly earlier,but I'm currently doing
research for my next book of theplus one theory and I want to
interview people who havepowerful stories that reflect
(20:28):
the heart of the plus one theory.
Doing just one extra thing madea meaningful difference in your
life and you'd like to befeatured in the book as a
success story real name orfictional.
Reach out to me.
I'd love to hear your journeyand even if we don't put it in
the book, I still want to hearit.
(20:49):
You can email me.
You can find me on any socialmedia outlet.
Most of them are under PamDwyer Speaker.
So if you're not sure what tosearch for, you can always find
me under Pam Dwyer, speaker.
And why is that?
Because I'm trying to get outinto the world of speaking.
(21:11):
I've never felt so on fire aboutanything than speaking to an
audience that need to inspirethem, motivate them, educate
them, teach them how to applyall these wonderful things.
The plus one theory and thepast doesn't define you, it
prepares you how to use anypainful past as energy and power
(21:35):
to succeed and make adifference.
Now, that came from the heart.
But if you know of anyone, ifyou work at a company that has
speakers, hey, raise your handand say I know of someone.
Her name is Pam Dwyer and shespeaks about amazing messages
that we could all use.
Or maybe you know someone thatis in event planning and they
(22:00):
need a speaker.
The cool thing about me is thatI'm not famous and I haven't
done a lot of speaking, so I'mpretty cheap y'all.
So if you're on a tight budgetand you need an amazing,
inspirational, motivationalspeaker, pamdwyercom is where
you need to go.
(22:20):
All right, y'all, I'll see younext week.
Let's keep it real, keep itkind and always add a little
more to make life a lot better.
Hey y'all.
It's Pam Dwyer.
If you're new here, welcome tothe Plus One Theory podcast.
I'm so glad you're listeningtoday.
Let me quickly explain what thePlus One Theory is all about.
It's the idea that when you'redoing your best, whatever that
looks like today, you can alwaysadd just one small intentional
(00:26):
step to move forward.
It's not about pushing yourselfto burnout.
It's about growing with purpose, being kind to yourself and
learning how small shifts canmake a big impact over time.
Also, just a quick disclaimerI'm not a therapist, a doctor or
(00:46):
a clinical expert.
I'm just someone who's beenthrough some hard stuff, done a
lot of healing, and now I get toshare what I've learned with
you.
So always take what serves youand leave the rest.
You and leave the rest.
(01:07):
And if a friend sent you thisepisode or you're tuning in for
the first time, you've come tothe right place.
Today we're diving intosomething that hits close to
home what happens when we startto lose our real selves while
trying to sound or act likesomeone we're not.
So today I am challenged bythose that love me and know me
(01:29):
to try and sound more authentic.
I've been trying too hard, Ibelieve.
So this is my confession to allof you today I've been using a
voice that doesn't really soundlike me, trying to sound
official and polished, but it'sjust not coming across as
authentic.
I mean, I think it is.
(01:50):
It's just.
I think those that know me wantto hear more from my heart, and
so I'm going to do that fromnow on, and I'm truly sorry that
I was so, I don't know, nervousor just those old feelings I
had from my childhood, growingup.
I just felt unworthy.
You know I wanted to sound asprofessional and polished as
(02:12):
possible, but the plus onetheory it deserves a real voice
because the message matters andthat's the whole reason for me
doing this, shouting from themountaintop, so to speak, about
how worthy we all are, howworthy you are, and if it
(02:33):
reaches just one person andhelps them realize that, then
the world's a lot better,because the more of us that feel
worthy and confident andrealizes what our true strengths
are, we can share them withothers, and that's what I'm
doing, that's what I'm trying todo.
So I hope that each of theseepisodes touch your heart and
(02:58):
hopefully helps you think ofsomeone that could hear the
message.
You know we all need to worktogether as a team to help all
those that need us.
That's what we're here to do.
So what's something in your liferight now that you're over
polishing?
Where are you afraid to just beyourself?
(03:20):
So I realized what I wasdescribing.
It's called.
There is a name for it.
It's called the impostersyndrome, and most people know
what that is.
It's like when you feel like a,like a fraud.
Even when you're qualified andpassionate about what you're
doing, sharing or saying orbeing, we sometimes feel like
(03:44):
we're not worthy of therecognition or of people hearing
us or listening to us.
Did you know that 70% I think Iread about this once, 70% of
people experience experiencethis imposter syndrome at some
point.
That's from Journal journal ofbehavioral science.
(04:06):
It hits hardest when you'redoing vulnerable, meaningful
work, and women especially tendto feel this when they care
deeply.
So have you ever downplayed yourgifts because you thought you
weren't enough?
Your gifts because you thoughtyou weren't enough?
(04:27):
I know we can all remember atime when that's happened.
I've even done it.
I have to tell you this, I'veeven.
I just thought of this.
I've even done it.
I'm very familiar with how a carengine works and when it needs
to have service.
But it seems like every time Igo and have the oil changed or a
repair done, it's usuallysomeone talking to me like I
(04:50):
don't know anything and so I cancorrect them.
I can let them know yes, I'maware of that, and what about
this, this, this and this?
But instead I find that I justdownplay it, my experience or my
knowledge.
I downplay it so that they feelbetter about what they are
(05:10):
telling me.
So I know it sounds crazy, buta lot of times I downplay what I
know to be true, and I'm sure alot of you have too.
(05:42):
So lately, what I tend to do andthe plus one is just instilled.
It's instilled in me so deeplythat it's hard sometimes for me
to not go above and beyond andgo that extra mile.
Or instead of 100%, I want togive 150%.
And through lots of therapy, Irealized that that's my way of
of saying okay, I know I'm notworthy enough to be doing this
task and I know that I I don'tfeel like I'm qualified.
So what I'm going to do is goabove and beyond like do 150% so
(06:05):
that you or anyone else willbelieve that I'm worthy to be
doing or that I'm worthlistening to or worth believing
in my skill or in my behavior orin my advice, whatever that is,
but it's because of the way Igrew up.
I grew up being invisible, Igrew up not being seen or heard,
(06:30):
and so therefore, I willstruggle with that for the rest
of my life.
But I continue to educatemyself, to learn to watch others
, to love others, and when theydon't want to let me love them,
I try to find out why you know,and then somehow somehow let
them know you're not letting mein because of this.
(06:54):
I know what you're doingbecause I did it.
So, yes, I am qualified and Iam worthy to share my
experiences with you, andhopefully my prayer is that you
can glean anything from thesestories and apply it to your own
life.
But even today, I tend to nottake my own advice to be real,
(07:18):
to remember all that I'velearned with life choices and
life disasters, and if we're notcareful, we can be in a endless
pattern of failure because weforget what we've learned or we
just don't want to see what thetruth is.
(07:40):
I mean my whole the book that Iwrote from the Piney Woods was
a really scary thing for me.
I mean, first of all, justputting my raw journal notes
from counseling out for theworld to read about.
Those journal notes are my veryprivate feelings, my honest,
(08:02):
raw feelings and folks.
I can't tell you enough howimportant journaling is because
I would read them over and over,even a year or two down the
road.
I'd read what I was feeling andthinking at a year ago so I can
remember now.
Okay, I'm thinking this becauseof that.
(08:23):
So it's a great reference forgrowth, because we're never
completely cured healed, notcured but we're never completely
healed.
We're healed enough where wecan tell ourselves okay, I
realize what I'm doing right nowand I need to stop it.
(08:44):
So for the last week or so I'vebeen feeling pretty discouraged
because there are people thathave been there for me and they
continue to be there for me,supporting me mentally,
financially, and they believe inme and my message that I want
(09:05):
to just shout out to the worldthat your past doesn't define
you, it prepares you and that'simportant, especially if you use
the plus one theory alongsideit.
I'm in the process of writing anew book the plus one theory
and right now I'm at astandstill.
I'll be honest with all of youit's very expensive to invest in
(09:29):
publishing a book, and that'snot the hardest part.
That's the critical part thatyou must do to put it out there
so people can understand whatthe message is by reading it or
listening to it.
But it's a great investmentfinancially and my husband,
bless his heart, has been sosupportive in that.
(09:50):
But the last thing I want isfor this just to be an expensive
hobby.
I want to put it in front ofevery person possible that needs
to read it.
It's not for everyoneespecially memoirs or
autobiographies or self-helptype books but it is for people
(10:12):
out there that need it.
But there's some people thatjust don't want to read
something like that, and that'sokay.
But I want to put it out therefor those that can benefit from
the message.
And so I'm struggling right nowbecause I feel I feel stuck, and
this podcast is for people thatfeel stuck.
(10:34):
So I've been listening to eachepisode, from episode one on to
this one, which is episode 16.
And I heard what my family andfriends were hearing.
I'm like, wow, I do sound veryprofessional.
I could get a job at a radiostation.
So now I'm being real andthat's what I'm going to do,
(10:58):
whether I pronounce a word,properly or not.
I'm just going to speak from myheart, and hopefully you can
relate, and from what I'msharing.
And so what I'm going to sharetoday is you are worthy.
You are worthy of everythingthat you can possibly dream of,
and there's always a way If youapply plus one, like that's what
(11:19):
I'm having to do right now.
I'm trying to figure out.
So how can I not burden myhusband and my family
financially to accomplish thisbook, to get this book published
?
The plus one theory.
And so I'm educating myself,I'm going out there and I'm
learning.
I'm learning so much.
(11:39):
There's a lot of things thatauthors can do, especially when
they're not, you know,financially set, but they have a
message or a book in them, astory they want to get out there
, and the best way you can dothat is there is crowdfunding,
it's called, and a lot of otheroptions out there.
And so I'm educating myself,I'm trying to learn.
(12:02):
It's just like when I firstpublished From the Piney Woods.
What a disaster that was, withmy impatient self.
I published that book andwinged it, and it was not what
it should have been, and becauseof that, the message was not as
powerful as it could have been.
So, tim and I felt like themessage was important enough and
(12:27):
we invested in getting itprofessionally edited,
professionally published, andnow I have people in my life
that I'm so thankful for that Ihave met through this whole
effort, this whole process.
They matter to me, they'reimportant, and I know that this
message is going to succeed.
(12:49):
The book's going to succeed.
It's going to be read by peoplethat need it the most.
So my story, my voice, my truth,that's what people connect with
, and I need to remember that.
Or you can remind me, please,please, submit reviews or
(13:11):
suggestions.
Even.
I am all about growing from theadvice of people that are
listening, because if I'm notdoing this well or not doing it
in a way that helps people grow,then I need to learn how I can
fix it.
So please share with me, sharewith your friends.
So this week I'm choosing toshow up more real.
(13:34):
That's my plus one this week,and why don't you share your
plus one with me?
By the way, that brings me tomy next little idea, my book,
the Plus One Theory.
I've been changing the strategyof it for the message, for the
theory to you know, and the bestway people relate to an idea or
(13:55):
a concept or a theory is withresearch and with proof and how
they can apply it to their ownlives.
You know, what can they takeaway and use?
And so I came up with this idea.
I think that I'm going to talkwith lots of people.
I'm offering a chance forpeople to share their story and
(14:21):
I'm going to put it in my book.
I'm going to share real lifestories of people that you know
succeeded in life, but it wasreally difficult.
Maybe the journey was tough,maybe it didn't end up the way
they thought it would, you know,but if they have a story they
want to share with the world, Iam happy to put it in my book.
So if you want to sharesomething with me and I can
(14:44):
write about it and include it inmy book, we can use real names
or we can use pretend names.
It's up to you, but if you sharethat with me or you feel led to
do that, please reach out to me.
You can email me at support atplus one publishing dot com, and
(15:06):
that plus P-L-U-S, the numberone publishing
P-U-B-L-I-S-H-I-N-G dot com.
Email me and just let me know.
Yes, pam, I have a story that Iwould love to share with you
and we can do that together overcoffee, tea, a meal.
I can come to your, jump onyour hamster wheel and meet you
(15:30):
at your work, meet you at one ofyour kids games.
I would love to cheer them on.
However, we can communicatewith one another, or maybe even
just over the phone.
All right, so what can we takeaway from this?
Today, you have to admit yourfear.
That alone deflates it.
So that's what I've been doingfor myself all week.
(15:52):
Is my fear?
My fear is failing you, failingall those people that really
need to hear that their pastdoesn't define them, that if
they messed up, if they didsomething horrible, they can
move beyond that.
They can use it and use it forstepping stones to make a bigger
(16:16):
impact in this world.
Learn how to show kindness,learn how to give kindness.
That's what empowers us, that'swhat gives us power, that
energizes us when we are kindand be willing to be seen.
Let people see the imperfectyou, because then they're going
(16:37):
to open up and feel like theycan relate to you more.
And, of course, always plus one, it One small step closer to
being yourself and loving it.
Loving yourself, loving all thethings that make you different,
because that's who you trulyare, and you can celebrate the
messy, messy middle.
(16:58):
That's where the growth lies.
We grow from our mistakes.
We learn from our mistakes.
We become stronger, wiser andmore able to help others.
So who are you when you're nottrying to impress anyone?
When you're not trying toimpress anyone, maybe when
you're sitting alone somewhereoutside having a meal or just
(17:28):
laying in the bed at nighttrying to get to sleep?
Who are you at that moment whenno one can hear you, no one can
see you?
That's who you truly are andthat's who we deserve to see and
know.
That's who I want to know.
I want to know the real you andit's who we deserve to see and
know.
That's who I want to know.
I want to know the real you,and it's only fair that I give
you the real me, and I have been.
It's just I don't know.
I've been trying to be betterthan what I felt I was.
(17:51):
So I promise no more podcastingbehind a mask.
You're just going to get thereal, pam, and so let's do this
together.
Let's do life real not polished, not perfect, but real, because
who we are is beautiful.
So share this with someonewho's battling self-doubt and
sometimes we battle itself-doubt and no one realizes
(18:15):
it.
No one realizes it.
They just think that we'remoody or in a bad mood or we're
just not approachable orvulnerable or open for
connection.
And all we have to do is justfeel better about ourselves and
forgive ourselves if we must.
If we need to do that, we mustforgive ourselves first so that
(18:35):
we can forgive others.
So you can join my email list atpamedwyercom to stay connected.
I know everyone hates gettingemails out, but I promise it's
the best way for us to stayconnected.
There's so many social mediaoutlets y'all.
I don't know if any of you relyon social media to grow your
(18:57):
business or your company or yourjob.
That man.
There's so many and people alluse.
Some people use Instagram, somepeople love Facebook, some
people hate Facebook and TikTokdon't get me started.
I haven't even I can't evenbegin to think about getting on
TikTok, but people tell me thatit's very useful.
But everyone emails Everyone.
(19:20):
I've never known anyone not tohave an email address.
So if you share that with me,all I'm going to do is share
when I write about any of thesethings.
The plus one theory you canlearn about the process of my
writing.
You can learn when we plan torelease the book and celebrate
(19:42):
it.
You can celebrate with me andgrow with me.
It's very exciting, and so, onthis journey, maybe you have a
book in you, maybe you have astory you want to share, so you
can learn from my mistakes.
That would make me very happyAlso.
So pamedwyercom is the way tostay connected with me.
Just just put that emailaddress in there and make sure
(20:05):
that I'm not spammed.
Don't spam, pam.
Oh, I just made that up, butanyway, I do have the special
announcement.
I mentioned it briefly earlier,but I'm currently doing
research for my next book of theplus one theory and I want to
interview people who havepowerful stories that reflect
(20:28):
the heart of the plus one theory.
Doing just one extra thing madea meaningful difference in your
life and you'd like to befeatured in the book as a
success story real name orfictional.
Reach out to me.
I'd love to hear your journeyand even if we don't put it in
the book, I still want to hearit.
(20:49):
You can email me.
You can find me on any socialmedia outlet.
Most of them are under PamDwyer Speaker.
So if you're not sure what tosearch for, you can always find
me under Pam Dwyer, speaker.
And why is that?
Because I'm trying to get outinto the world of speaking.
(21:11):
I've never felt so on fire aboutanything than speaking to an
audience that need to inspirethem, motivate them, educate
them, teach them how to applyall these wonderful things.
The plus one theory and thepast doesn't define you, it
prepares you how to use anypainful past as energy and power
(21:35):
to succeed and make adifference.
Now, that came from the heart.
But if you know of anyone, ifyou work at a company that has
speakers, hey, raise your handand say I know of someone.
Her name is Pam Dwyer and shespeaks about amazing messages
that we could all use.
Or maybe you know someone thatis in event planning and they
(22:00):
need a speaker.
The cool thing about me is thatI'm not famous and I haven't
done a lot of speaking, so I'mpretty cheap y'all.
So if you're on a tight budgetand you need an amazing,
inspirational, motivationalspeaker, pamdwyercom is where
you need to go.
(22:20):
All right, y'all, I'll see younext week.
Let's keep it real, keep itkind and always add a little
more to make life a lot better.
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