Episode 25: Mindset First, Weight Loss Second: A Bariatric Journey

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Weight loss requires more than physical changes, it demands a mental shift that starts in your head and continues with small steps toward sustainable health.

• The Plus One Theory focuses on adding one more positive choice, step, or belief to finish stronger than you started
• Weight loss requires more than surgery, medication, or coaching, it needs mindset transformation
• At nearly 300 pounds, my health deteriorated with migraines, infections, and high blood pressure
• Bariatric surgery became my tool, not my solution, after nearly dying from surgical complications
• The bariatric lifestyle requires strict portion control, hydration, protein intake, and supplement regimens
• Obesity is a disease, not a character flaw or simple choice
• Small mindset shifts work better than any diet plan for sustainable weight management
• Practical strategies include pre-portioning snacks, packing half restaurant meals before eating, and food journaling
• Overcoming shame is essential, you are not defined by your regain or slip-ups
• Support the Plus One Theory book and workbook through our crowdfunding campaign at this link!

Join me at the Seger Circle support group hosted by Seger MD Wellness and Weight Management on June 2nd at 6:30 for more on the three M's of bariatric success (Mindset, Motivation, Maintenance)

 Zoom link

An Inspiring Evening with Pam Dwyer
When: 6/2/25 6:30pm CST
Where: Virtual

Topic: "Mindset of Weight Loss - It Starts in Your Head"

Be a Guest on The Plus One Theory Podcast!

Are you someone who believes in the power of kindness, resilience, and intentional growth? Do you have a story about how small, meaningful steps have made a difference in your life or career?

I’d love to invite you to share your journey on The Plus One Theory Podcast!

This podcast is all about exploring how we can apply the Plus One Theory to create ripples of positivity and purpose in our personal and professional lives. I’m especially excited to feature guests who work in heart-centered careers—nurses, teachers, counselors, nonprofit leaders, caregivers, or anyone who dedicates their energy to helping others.

Your story could inspire listeners who are navigating their own challenges and looking for ways to take that next small step forward. Whether you’ve used kindness to overcome adversity, found strength in vulnerability, or applied intentional action to make an impact in your community, I want to hear from you!

Interested? Here’s How to Reach Out:

• Email me with a brief introduction about yourself and your story.
• Let me know how the Plus One Theory has played a role in your life or career.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:13):
Hey everyone, welcome to the Plus One Theory podcast.
If you're new here, I'm PamDwyer and this podcast it's all
about finding real strength insmall steps.
That's what the plus one theoryis doing your best and then
adding just one more, one morechoice, one more step, one more

(00:34):
ounce of belief in yourself.
It's how we finish strongerthan we started.
Before we dive in, let me justsay I'm not a doctor or a mental
health expert.
I'm just someone who's beenthrough the fire and found a way
out.
What I share here is what'shelped me, and I hope it gives

(00:57):
you something real to take withyou.
Today's episode is all aboutmindset, because here's the
truth.
That took me years tounderstand Weight loss.
Well, it isn't just physical,it's emotional, it's mental, it
starts in your head.
You can do all the right thingstake the medications, have the

(01:18):
surgeries, hire the coach but ifyour mindset hasn't shifted,
that change is not going tostick, and that's what I want to
talk about today.
I used to weigh nearly 300pounds.
I was exhausted, sick andhonestly, I felt like I had no
way out.
My health was failing migrainesthat knocked me out for days,

(01:44):
gut infections, high bloodpressure, no energy and deep,
painful shame.
I felt like I had failed.
Again and again I'd gain weight, I'd lose weight.
I'd gain more weight and lose alittle less weight.
It was just this roller coasterweight and lose a little less

(02:07):
weight.
It was just this roller coaster.
Doctors didn't always believeme when I told them that I was
still feeling horrible and theywould say well, your labs look
great, except for your highblood pressure.
And one even told me once youjust need therapy, pam, and you
know what?
Maybe I did.
But what I really needed wassomeone to listen, to believe me

(02:27):
, to help me see that I wasn'tcrazy or lazy or broken.
I was struggling and I needed away through, chose, yes,
bariatric surgery, not becauseit was easy, but because I

(02:48):
needed a tool to help me makethe changes.
I couldn't do on my own at thatpoint, and even that didn't
come easy.
I had complications with thesurgery.
I almost died and it wasterrifying.
The staples didn't hold and itwas because of the conditions of
my stomach and gut tissues fromall the bacterial infection of

(03:09):
H pylori.
It had done that much damage.
So, anyway, the staples didn'thold and everything fell apart
inside of me, kind of like alike a jigsaw puzzle.
So I bled out like 40% of myblood but nothing.
But my doctor saved my life.
He went back in and sutured itby hand, which he told me he

(03:32):
hasn't done in a very long time.
But he and the other surgeonshave never seen anything like
that.
So that's the one percenter inPam.
Every surgery I've ever hadthere's been some sort of weird
unseen complication.
I don't know what that's allabout, but I always tell the

(03:53):
doctor doing the surgery well,I'm your one percenter.
They just laugh and say I knowyou feel that way, but it's not
going to happen.
And then it happens.
But here's the thing that savedme.
I stopped seeing the surgery asthe fix.
I saw it as the tool, the realchange that came from inside me.

(04:14):
Before surgery I convincedmyself I was doing everything I
could to lose the weight.
But deep down I knew I wasn't.
I was tired, I was hurting andI didn't believe that I deserved
better.
What changed was my mindset.
I started to see myselfdifferently.

(04:36):
I realized that I'm not afailure, I'm a fighter.
I've survived a lot and now Iget to take my next step.
That's where the plus onetheory came in.
One more step.
One more small win, one moreI've got this.
So the transition into abariatric style of living is a

(05:01):
big deal, I mean.
That's why it takes a good yearbefore you have the surgery for
insurance, to feel comfortableenough that you have all the
conditions that are risky foryou and also that you can.
You can actually handle the newlifestyle.
New lifestyle what is that?
If some of you don't know, itmeans eating four ounces of food

(05:24):
at one sitting, no fluid at all.
You can't drink anything for anhour after you eat, you are to
consume at least 64 ounces ofwater no sugar, no carbs, high
protein, like 120 grams ofprotein.
So I don't know if anyone everthinks about drinking that much

(05:48):
water when all you can do istake a sip.
You only have a four ouncepouch, so you can't, you know,
drink a lot of water at once.
You have to sip on it all daylong, so it's difficult to get
all the water in the proteins,you know.
And then there's the supplements.
Don't get me started on that.
And then there's thesupplements.

(06:09):
Don't get me started on that.
You know, the part of your gutthat processes nutrients has
been bypassed.
So now it's critical that youtake your supplements and you
need to each year at least everyyear have all of that checked,
because how do you know ifyou're taking enough of vitamin

(06:29):
B's or vitamin D's or vitaminE's?
Are you consuming enoughcalcium?
Are you following all the rules?
Don't eat food with the calcium.
But it's just a constant stateof awareness, which I wouldn't
have been almost 300 pounds if Iknew how to do that, been

(06:54):
almost 300 pounds if I knew howto do that.
So they do try to teach you andeducate you about what will
need to happen.
The tool will hold youaccountable.
It's no longer well, I couldeat this this one time.
Nope, if you eat the wrongamount of food or the wrong type
of food, it literally makes yousick.
That's what the tool is allabout.
It holds you accountable.

(07:16):
A lot of my friends and familythey gave me a hard time, a lot
of fat shaming.
You know like you're cheating.
You're taking the easy way out.
You know why did you cut yourinsides all up like that?
That's ridiculous.
So I would always tell themwell, what?
If I had cancer, I would takethe radiation treatments.
Do the best thing I can to tryand kill the cancer treatments

(07:43):
do the best thing I can to tryand kill the cancer.
But if I couldn't and I wasstill going to die I would
remove whatever has the cancer,an organ, a piece of my body,
whatever it takes to get rid ofthat cancer, to eliminate it.
So I look at a gastric bypass.
That's similar.
In a similar way.
It's like removing a bigportion of your stomach, almost

(08:04):
like it has cancer.
I'm getting rid of the issue ofthe problem that is trying to
kill me.
So when I give them thatscenario they kind of understand
me a little bit better.
Can we talk about something thatdoesn't get said enough?
Obesity is a disease.
It's not about being lazy.

(08:25):
It's not about loving junk food.
It's not even just about havingbad habits.
It's deeper than that.
Even after surgery, even afterlosing the weight, the risk of
regain is real.
The fat cells don't disappeary'all, they just shrink.
And if we don't address themindset behind why we gain the

(08:49):
weight in the first place, weend up back where we started or
worse.
That's why small, intentionalmindset shifts matter more than
any diet plan out there.
Okay, let's get practical here.
Here are some plus one thingsI've done and still do to

(09:09):
support my mindset and my health.
I portion my snacks ahead oftime.
This is big because I'm asnacker, so no more eating like
chips out of the big bag.
So if I want to watch a movie,I used to just grab the big bag
of chips and sit there andmindlessly eat the whole bag.
So now what I do is I get thebig bag of chips but then

(09:30):
portion them out into littleZiploc snack bags.
That way when I want chips Ijust grab a small, one size
portion and watch the movie.
I will mindlessly eat them aswell, but at least it's a small
portion and not the whole bag.
At restaurants I ask for ato-go box before the meal

(09:51):
arrives.
I pack half of it up before Istart, meaning I'm not going to
sit there and visit witheveryone I'm eating dinner with
and mindlessly eat the entireplate.
So what I do is I pack up halfof it and put it to the side and
then I can visit and eat mywhole plate, but it's half the

(10:12):
size.
It's been very helpful for meto do that at the beginning of
the meal.
Also, journaling your food iscritical, because it's not just
what you eat but how you feelwhen you eat it.
I learned from a podcast Ilistened to a lot that if you

(10:34):
put two columns on the left side, you write in what you're going
to eat that day, you plan itout, and then on the right side,
in the second column, I writedown what I actually ate.
It's usually more than what Iplanned.
It's not so much I stray fromwhat type of food, but if I

(10:56):
planned out a certain portion, Iusually exceed that.
I noticed, but only when I'mstressed or upset, happy, sad,
whatever I'm feeling.
It usually indicates that I'memotionally stressed when I

(11:16):
stray from my planned meals.
So, anyway, just ask yourselfwhat was going on in my head
that day.
This isn't about being perfect,it's about being aware.
Educate yourself, figure outwhat's going on in my head, and
that awareness is powerful.
All right, let me be real Shame.

(11:39):
Shame will steal every bit ofprogress you make.
You are not your regain, youare not your slip ups, you are
not your past.
If we don't deal with the shame, we stay stuck.
Your job is not to be perfect.
Your job is to keep movingforward, one step at a time, to

(12:05):
keep healing, to keep showing upfor yourself because you're
worth it.
Give yourself a little grace.
I want to invite you tosomething really special.
I'll be speaking at the SeegerCircle, which is a support group
that's hosted by SeegerMDWellness and Weight Management.
It's a space for people who getit, who knows what it's like to

(12:31):
struggle with weight.
I'll be sharing on the plus onetheory and the three M's of
bariatric success mindset, whichwe've been talking about today
motivation and maintenance andthat's going to be another two
episodes, one on motivation andone on maintenance.
I'm excited to do it.
Y'all.
I hope you listen in.

(12:52):
So, whether you've had surgeryor not, this talk is for anyone
trying to get back on track andfeel supported.
For anyone trying to get backon track and feel supported,
join us tomorrow, june 2nd, at6.30, I believe I put the Zoom
link in the episode notes.
So please join us.
You don't have to be apost-bariatric patient.

(13:14):
You can be someone that's juston a weight loss journey and
trying to figure it all out.
Before I go, I want to remindyou you can finish stronger than
you started, no matter whereyou're starting from.
Today, and if you've beenlooking for a way to support the
Plus One Theory and getinvolved, I've launched a
crowdfunding campaign to publishthe full book and workbook.

(13:36):
It only takes $5, $10, $20 toshow your support and there are
great rewards, especially forwork teams or anyone who wants
to dig deeper.
Visit PamDwyercom orPamDwyerSpeakercom to learn more
.
Thanks for being here with meand remember give yourself grace

(13:57):
, one small step at a time andalways, always, finish stronger
than you started.