August 3, 2025 • 13 mins
The truth about binging isn't about willpower or discipline but understanding the pain beneath the pattern and learning to pause before acting on urges.
• The Plus One Theory is about finishing stronger than you started
• Binge behaviors aren't weakness – they're pain responses
• The power is in the pause – delaying rather than fighting the binge
• Five steps of Delay the Binge: pause, support, structure, insight, and helping others
• Maintenance requires devotion, not just discipline
• Simple tools like the two-column journal help identify triggers
• Setting a 60-second timer can interrupt the binge cycle
• True healing comes from asking "why the pain" not "why the binge"
Join me for an upcoming Seger Circle support group on Tuesday, August 5th from 6-7 PM Central Time. Get the Zoom link by joining my email list at PamDwyerSpeaker.com and follow me on social media at @PamDwyerSpeaker
Visit Pam Dwyer online and sign up on her email list to receive the latest updates and join her short stories that are published every Tuesday!
Go to PamDwyerSpeaker.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Hello and welcome to the Plus One Theory Podcast.
I'm your host, pam Dwyer, andyou are going to love this
episode because today I'm goingto tell you the truth about
binging that no one talks about.
Not just food, not justcravings, but the real reason.
You keep going back to thepatterns you swore you'd break.
(00:34):
This episode could changeeverything, because once you
understand the power of onepause, you'll never look at the
binge the same way again.
The power of one pause you'llnever look at the binge the same
way again.
Quick disclaimer this podcastis not therapy.
(00:54):
It's real talk from livedexperience.
If you're struggling with aneating disorder or serious
mental health concern, pleasereach out to a qualified
professional because you'reworth the help.
And if you're new here, welcome.
Let me tell you what the plusone theory is really about.
It's simple.
You don't have to be perfect.
You just have to finishstronger than you started.
That's it.
(01:15):
Whether it's your health, yourhealing, your relationships or
your calling, this mindset helpsyou turn pain into purpose.
One small step at a time.
That's the plus one theory, andtoday's episode, this, is one
of those steps.
So hey, you're not broken,you're just tired of holding it
(01:39):
all together.
You've done the diets, you'vetried the willpower thing,
you've counted, tracked, weighedand restarted, and still the
cravings come, the urges hit andthe guilt follows.
But here's the truth thatpattern isn't weakness, it's
(02:01):
pain.
And your brain has learned tosoothe the pain with habits
habits that feel good for asecond or two and wreck you
right after.
Here's what no one told you youdon't have to fight the binge,
you just have to delay it.
That's where the power is inthe pause.
(02:21):
Because that pause, that'swhere the power is in the pause,
because that pause, that's themoment you shift the pattern.
That's when you stop asking whydo I keep doing this?
And start asking what's reallyhurting right now.
You take a breath, you name theurge, you delay just one minute
(02:43):
, then maybe another.
That's how Delay the Bingeworks.
It's not a diet, it's not ashame spiral.
It's a rescue plan, a newpattern, a new story, a new you.
Inside the program, you'll learnfive simple, powerful steps.
The first and most importantone is the pause.
(03:09):
You learn to recognize the urgebefore it takes over.
And number two is the support.
You don't need more strength,you need a safe team to surround
you while you're discoveringthis about yourself, while
you're becoming, you needaccountability.
Step number three is structure.
Very important here.
(03:29):
Use tools like journals andplanning, not to punish but to
protect you.
And step four is the insightthe insight to education, which
leads to motivation.
Learn why you do what you do.
And step number five is theplus one Heal forward by helping
(03:57):
someone else.
That's where purpose lives.
You're not here to survive,you're here to heal, to maintain
and to thrive.
That's not discipline, that'sdevotion.
Devotion means choosingyourself, even when no one's
(04:19):
watching.
And when you do it, you'llfinish stronger than you started
.
That's the plus one way.
Let me ask you something haveyou ever told yourself I'll
start fresh tomorrow, only tofind yourself stuck in the same
cycle the very next night?
You make the plan, you set theintention and then the urge hits
(04:42):
and suddenly it's like you'reon autopilot, grabbing snacks,
scrolling your phone, pouring adrink, whatever it is that helps
you escape just for a moment.
But here's the truth mostpeople miss.
You're not broken, you're notlazy, and it's not about
willpower.
(05:02):
You're just trying to quiet thepain, the noise in your heart.
That's what Delay, the Binge,is here to help you see, because
you don't need anotherrestriction plan, you don't need
someone yelling, just tryharder from the sidelines.
What you need is devotion, notdiscipline, not punishment, not
(05:24):
guilt, devotion to becoming theversion of you that's been
buried under the pain.
Delay the binge exists to dowhat the diet plans won't.
It slows that cycle down justlong enough for you to ask why
the pain, not why the binge.
And when you get curious aboutthe pain, that's where healing
(05:48):
begins.
That's the magic.
This isn't a quick fix.
It's not a detox.
It's a new mindset, a newpattern, a new habit, and you
build it one delay at a time.
And here's something elsenobody's telling you.
If you're using bariatricsurgery, glp-1s or other tools
(06:09):
to lose weight, great, use thosetools, but don't skip the inner
work in the process, becausethose tools don't teach you how
to maintain.
Maintenance is where most peoplefall apart, because they never
learned why they reached forfood in the first place.
Delay the binge helps youuncover the why, so you can take
(06:33):
back your power without shame.
And when you learn to delay,not deny, you discover something
else.
You're not just trying to loseweight, you're trying to find
yourself again.
Most people avoid maintenancebecause losing weight in the
first place is hard right, butmaintaining it.
(06:55):
That's a whole different game.
And here's what no one preparesyou for.
Maintenance isn't a finish line.
It's not a one-time goal youhit.
It's a daily devotion.
You see people talk aboutdiscipline like it's the secret
sauce.
But let's be honest.
(07:15):
Discipline fades when life getshard, when you're tired, when
you're stressed, when you feelalone.
Loneliness is a big one.
That's where devotion comes inNot the grind, not the hustle,
but a sacred, quiet commitmentto who you're becoming.
(07:38):
Maintenance is built in thoselittle moments.
Those little moments like whenyou choose to reflect instead of
react, or when you catchyourself mid-pattern and you
pause, or when you write it down, even when you'd rather forget
it happened.
And yes, I'm going to challengeyou to go old school here.
(08:03):
Grab a pencil and a paper, splitthe page into two columns.
On the right side, you writewhat you plan to eat today
Snacks, desserts, the wholething and on the left, you write
what you actually ate that day.
And here's the magic part.
You don't stop there.
You write down why you strayedfrom the plan.
(08:26):
Why did you grab that extrahandful of chips?
Why did dinner turn into a latenight graze?
You're not judging yourself.
You're just getting curious,because until you know why you
veered off track, you can'tcreate a strategy that keeps you
on it.
This isn't about tracking torestrict yourself.
(08:46):
It's about reconnecting withyourself.
And if you're struggling,here's a tool I use myself.
So when I want to eat somethingI know is unhealthy and not
good for me you know it doesn'tserve me I set a timer.
I literally have a timer that Iput on the counter and I set it
(09:07):
for 60 seconds.
And during that minute I scrollthrough my old photos of myself
when I was at my heaviest, myunhealthiest, and it's not to
shame myself never that but toremember how far I've come, to
feel the fight I've alreadysurvived.
(09:28):
And if I still want it afterthe timer, well, I set it again.
Sometimes I still eat it, butmost of the time I've shifted,
I've interrupted the cycle, andthat's the power of maintenance.
You learn to pause, you learn topivot, you learn to stay
devoted even when it's hard,because devotion to yourself,
(09:52):
that's what makes the progresslast, that's how you change your
story, that's how you build anew pattern and that's how you
heal.
Because here's the truth.
You don't have to fixeverything, you just have to
delay it long enough to rememberwho you are.
Delay the binge is more than aphrase.
(10:14):
It's a framework, a practice, alifeline, and I'm teaching it
in workshops, in online webinarsand in real conversations with
real people just like you, whoare ready to stop hiding and
start healing.
If you're tired of bouncingbetween shame and willpower,
(10:36):
this is your invitation to pause.
This is where the healingbegins one delay at a time.
Here's what I want you to hearbefore we go.
You didn't come this far justto lose the weight.
You came this far to findyourself.
Maintenance isn't just aboutkeeping weight off.
(10:56):
It's about rediscovering whoyou are underneath the patterns,
the pain, the pressure to beperfect, because when the scale
stops moving, the real workstarts the work of sustaining
what you fought for, the work ofstaying devoted to the new
(11:17):
version of you, not withdiscipline that punishes, but
with devotion that protects.
When you devote yourself tohealing, you learn how to
motivate through education, howto pause through pain and how to
move forward with grace insteadof guilt.
You don't need to hustle tokeep up.
(11:39):
You need tools to stay grounded.
That's what Delay the Bingegives you A two-column journal
to see your truth in ink, adisruption menu to build your
lifeline list, a support circlethat walks beside you and a
(11:59):
mindset that finishes stronger.
This program wasn't built tomake you better.
It was built to help you.
Remember you were never broken.
Every mountain you've facedprepared you for the one you're
climbing now, and when you getto the top, when the air is thin
(12:22):
and the view is breathtaking, Iwant you to stand there knowing
you didn't shortcut the journey.
You earned every single stepand if you want support on that
journey, if delay the bingefeels like your next step, I'd
love for you to walk with us.
I'm also sharing more at theupcoming Seeger Circle support
(12:46):
group Tuesday, august 5th, from6 to 7 Central Time and that's
in the evening.
By the way, that's PM.
I'll be speaking on maintenance, devotion and small shifts that
create big wins.
It's online and you're invited.
You can get the Zoom link byjoining my email list at
(13:06):
pamedwirespeakercom.
Let me send you support, notspam, just wisdom, tools and
truth.
And don't forget, follow me onall my socials.
Pam Dwyer Speaker.
Like, subscribe, follow.
You know the drill.
You want to make a differencewith just one more.
(13:27):
Then be someone's plus onetoday.
Encourage them, help themfinish stronger, because your
past doesn't define you.
It prepares you to finishstronger than you started.
Thanks for listening.
Hello and welcome to the Plus One Theory Podcast.
I'm your host, pam Dwyer, andyou are going to love this
episode because today I'm goingto tell you the truth about
binging that no one talks about.
Not just food, not justcravings, but the real reason.
You keep going back to thepatterns you swore you'd break.
(00:34):
This episode could changeeverything, because once you
understand the power of onepause, you'll never look at the
binge the same way again.
The power of one pause you'llnever look at the binge the same
way again.
Quick disclaimer this podcastis not therapy.
(00:54):
It's real talk from livedexperience.
If you're struggling with aneating disorder or serious
mental health concern, pleasereach out to a qualified
professional because you'reworth the help.
And if you're new here, welcome.
Let me tell you what the plusone theory is really about.
It's simple.
You don't have to be perfect.
You just have to finishstronger than you started.
That's it.
(01:15):
Whether it's your health, yourhealing, your relationships or
your calling, this mindset helpsyou turn pain into purpose.
One small step at a time.
That's the plus one theory, andtoday's episode, this, is one
of those steps.
So hey, you're not broken,you're just tired of holding it
(01:39):
all together.
You've done the diets, you'vetried the willpower thing,
you've counted, tracked, weighedand restarted, and still the
cravings come, the urges hit andthe guilt follows.
But here's the truth thatpattern isn't weakness, it's
(02:01):
pain.
And your brain has learned tosoothe the pain with habits
habits that feel good for asecond or two and wreck you
right after.
Here's what no one told you youdon't have to fight the binge,
you just have to delay it.
That's where the power is inthe pause.
(02:21):
Because that pause, that'swhere the power is in the pause,
because that pause, that's themoment you shift the pattern.
That's when you stop asking whydo I keep doing this?
And start asking what's reallyhurting right now.
You take a breath, you name theurge, you delay just one minute
(02:43):
, then maybe another.
That's how Delay the Bingeworks.
It's not a diet, it's not ashame spiral.
It's a rescue plan, a newpattern, a new story, a new you.
Inside the program, you'll learnfive simple, powerful steps.
The first and most importantone is the pause.
(03:09):
You learn to recognize the urgebefore it takes over.
And number two is the support.
You don't need more strength,you need a safe team to surround
you while you're discoveringthis about yourself, while
you're becoming, you needaccountability.
Step number three is structure.
Very important here.
(03:29):
Use tools like journals andplanning, not to punish but to
protect you.
And step four is the insightthe insight to education, which
leads to motivation.
Learn why you do what you do.
And step number five is theplus one Heal forward by helping
(03:57):
someone else.
That's where purpose lives.
You're not here to survive,you're here to heal, to maintain
and to thrive.
That's not discipline, that'sdevotion.
Devotion means choosingyourself, even when no one's
(04:19):
watching.
And when you do it, you'llfinish stronger than you started
.
That's the plus one way.
Let me ask you something haveyou ever told yourself I'll
start fresh tomorrow, only tofind yourself stuck in the same
cycle the very next night?
You make the plan, you set theintention and then the urge hits
(04:42):
and suddenly it's like you'reon autopilot, grabbing snacks,
scrolling your phone, pouring adrink, whatever it is that helps
you escape just for a moment.
But here's the truth mostpeople miss.
You're not broken, you're notlazy, and it's not about
willpower.
(05:02):
You're just trying to quiet thepain, the noise in your heart.
That's what Delay, the Binge,is here to help you see, because
you don't need anotherrestriction plan, you don't need
someone yelling, just tryharder from the sidelines.
What you need is devotion, notdiscipline, not punishment, not
(05:24):
guilt, devotion to becoming theversion of you that's been
buried under the pain.
Delay the binge exists to dowhat the diet plans won't.
It slows that cycle down justlong enough for you to ask why
the pain, not why the binge.
And when you get curious aboutthe pain, that's where healing
(05:48):
begins.
That's the magic.
This isn't a quick fix.
It's not a detox.
It's a new mindset, a newpattern, a new habit, and you
build it one delay at a time.
And here's something elsenobody's telling you.
If you're using bariatricsurgery, glp-1s or other tools
(06:09):
to lose weight, great, use thosetools, but don't skip the inner
work in the process, becausethose tools don't teach you how
to maintain.
Maintenance is where most peoplefall apart, because they never
learned why they reached forfood in the first place.
Delay the binge helps youuncover the why, so you can take
(06:33):
back your power without shame.
And when you learn to delay,not deny, you discover something
else.
You're not just trying to loseweight, you're trying to find
yourself again.
Most people avoid maintenancebecause losing weight in the
first place is hard right, butmaintaining it.
(06:55):
That's a whole different game.
And here's what no one preparesyou for.
Maintenance isn't a finish line.
It's not a one-time goal youhit.
It's a daily devotion.
You see people talk aboutdiscipline like it's the secret
sauce.
But let's be honest.
(07:15):
Discipline fades when life getshard, when you're tired, when
you're stressed, when you feelalone.
Loneliness is a big one.
That's where devotion comes inNot the grind, not the hustle,
but a sacred, quiet commitmentto who you're becoming.
(07:38):
Maintenance is built in thoselittle moments.
Those little moments like whenyou choose to reflect instead of
react, or when you catchyourself mid-pattern and you
pause, or when you write it down, even when you'd rather forget
it happened.
And yes, I'm going to challengeyou to go old school here.
(08:03):
Grab a pencil and a paper, splitthe page into two columns.
On the right side, you writewhat you plan to eat today
Snacks, desserts, the wholething and on the left, you write
what you actually ate that day.
And here's the magic part.
You don't stop there.
You write down why you strayedfrom the plan.
(08:26):
Why did you grab that extrahandful of chips?
Why did dinner turn into a latenight graze?
You're not judging yourself.
You're just getting curious,because until you know why you
veered off track, you can'tcreate a strategy that keeps you
on it.
This isn't about tracking torestrict yourself.
(08:46):
It's about reconnecting withyourself.
And if you're struggling,here's a tool I use myself.
So when I want to eat somethingI know is unhealthy and not
good for me you know it doesn'tserve me I set a timer.
I literally have a timer that Iput on the counter and I set it
(09:07):
for 60 seconds.
And during that minute I scrollthrough my old photos of myself
when I was at my heaviest, myunhealthiest, and it's not to
shame myself never that but toremember how far I've come, to
feel the fight I've alreadysurvived.
(09:28):
And if I still want it afterthe timer, well, I set it again.
Sometimes I still eat it, butmost of the time I've shifted,
I've interrupted the cycle, andthat's the power of maintenance.
You learn to pause, you learn topivot, you learn to stay
devoted even when it's hard,because devotion to yourself,
(09:52):
that's what makes the progresslast, that's how you change your
story, that's how you build anew pattern and that's how you
heal.
Because here's the truth.
You don't have to fixeverything, you just have to
delay it long enough to rememberwho you are.
Delay the binge is more than aphrase.
(10:14):
It's a framework, a practice, alifeline, and I'm teaching it
in workshops, in online webinarsand in real conversations with
real people just like you, whoare ready to stop hiding and
start healing.
If you're tired of bouncingbetween shame and willpower,
(10:36):
this is your invitation to pause.
This is where the healingbegins one delay at a time.
Here's what I want you to hearbefore we go.
You didn't come this far justto lose the weight.
You came this far to findyourself.
Maintenance isn't just aboutkeeping weight off.
(10:56):
It's about rediscovering whoyou are underneath the patterns,
the pain, the pressure to beperfect, because when the scale
stops moving, the real workstarts the work of sustaining
what you fought for, the work ofstaying devoted to the new
(11:17):
version of you, not withdiscipline that punishes, but
with devotion that protects.
When you devote yourself tohealing, you learn how to
motivate through education, howto pause through pain and how to
move forward with grace insteadof guilt.
You don't need to hustle tokeep up.
(11:39):
You need tools to stay grounded.
That's what Delay the Bingegives you A two-column journal
to see your truth in ink, adisruption menu to build your
lifeline list, a support circlethat walks beside you and a
(11:59):
mindset that finishes stronger.
This program wasn't built tomake you better.
It was built to help you.
Remember you were never broken.
Every mountain you've facedprepared you for the one you're
climbing now, and when you getto the top, when the air is thin
(12:22):
and the view is breathtaking, Iwant you to stand there knowing
you didn't shortcut the journey.
You earned every single stepand if you want support on that
journey, if delay the bingefeels like your next step, I'd
love for you to walk with us.
I'm also sharing more at theupcoming Seeger Circle support
(12:46):
group Tuesday, august 5th, from6 to 7 Central Time and that's
in the evening.
By the way, that's PM.
I'll be speaking on maintenance, devotion and small shifts that
create big wins.
It's online and you're invited.
You can get the Zoom link byjoining my email list at
(13:06):
pamedwirespeakercom.
Let me send you support, notspam, just wisdom, tools and
truth.
And don't forget, follow me onall my socials.
Pam Dwyer Speaker.
Like, subscribe, follow.
You know the drill.
You want to make a differencewith just one more.
(13:27):
Then be someone's plus onetoday.
Encourage them, help themfinish stronger, because your
past doesn't define you.
It prepares you to finishstronger than you started.
Thanks for listening.
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