May 27, 2025 • 16 mins
In today’s episode of The Provider's Report, I’m sharing a real and intense situation that recently unfolded in our clinic—an incident involving verbal abuse toward a team member. We dive deep into the moment, our response, and most importantly: what it taught us about the importance of boundaries, de-escalation, and team safety.
You'll learn:
- The full story behind the incident—and how we handled it.
- What current research and healthcare standards say about de-escalation.
- How to recognize when a patient crosses the line.
- How to professionally and directly address inappropriate behavior as a clinic owner.
- A simple outline for training your team on how to de-escalate situations with confidence.
- Why it’s your responsibility to create a safe environment for your staff—and how that makes your practice stronger.
If you're a healthcare leader, this episode is for you.
🔗 Resources Mentioned:
- Crisis Prevention Institute (CPI) – De-escalation Strategies
https://www.crisisprevention.com/Blog/De-escalation-Tips - CDC NIOSH – Workplace Violence in Healthcare
https://www.cdc.gov/niosh/topics/violence/ - The Joint Commission – Deescalation in Health Care
https://www.jointcommission.org/resources/news-and-multimedia/newsletters/newsletters/quick-safety/quick-safety-47-deescalation-in-health-care/
Follow us on social media!
- Instagram: @theprovidersreport
- Facebook: @theprovidersreport
- Twitter / X: @providersreport
- LinkedIn: @the-providers-report
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hey guys.
Have you ever been disrespectedby a patient?
And I don't mean just maybe likean inappropriate comment or
statement, but downrightdisrespectful.
Borderline aggressive.
I mean, we're talking likeactual probable verbal and
hopefully not, but sometimesphysical abuse.
These things really happen inthe workplace, especially in
(00:21):
healthcare.
And we had an incident that Iwanna talk about, this happened
a couple months ago, where oneof my team members, thankfully,
virtually, over the phone.
Was quite literally verballyabused by a patient.
She had to contact the patientbecause of a coordination of
benefits issue.
That means that claims weresubmitted.
Their insurance came back to ussaying, Hey, this patient
(00:42):
probably has another insurance.
So they weren't gonna processanything until that had been.
Set aside something like, youknow, the primary had been
changed or is no longer active.
Basically the patient had to bethe one to contact one of those
insurance companies and let themknow an update to their
insurance status.
That's something thatunfortunately, providers can't
do.
There's just no way for us to beable to do that.
(01:05):
so your only option is to tellthe patient, have them resolve
it, and then resubmit claims, orsometimes they'll just naturally
reprocess it.
so we call that patient to tellthem this.
It would've covered everything.
Maybe a low copay, one of thosesituations.
So we tried to tell him this,and in the process of doing so,
he just erupted on my teammember.
I mean, we're talking probably agood five minutes of yelling and
(01:29):
screaming and like.
Quite literally being rude toher face, making it seem like it
was our problem, that we didthis, we're we're at fault to
that kind of stuff.
Very different from like twopeople misunderstanding each
other.
This was quite literally verbalabuse, and definitely not the
kind of behavior you wouldexpect from someone you don't
even know.
Thankfully, I was very fortunatethat the team member that was
(01:51):
dealing with this is a rockstarShe has.
One of the biggest superpowersof being able to understand
social cues and how todeescalate situations and how to
handle people.
She's very body aware, verysocially aware, and just really
understands humans, and I cannotimagine if this had happened to
anyone else because I think shewas so prepared to handle it.
(02:14):
So before we dive into the nittygritty, I want to tell you
exactly what she did.
She literally let this manspeak.
You know, she tried to get acouple words in at first, but it
was very clear that he wasn'tgoing to let her.
And so she finally just let himdo his thing, and then when he
was finished and had no more gasleft in the tank, she just kind
of let the awkward silencehappen.
(02:36):
let a couple seconds of silence,just absolutely marinate, which
I think is really important.
And we're gonna tap into why inthis episode.
And then afterward, sheliterally just said.
Sir, I understand that you'refrustrated.
This is what we were told.
This is what we're prepared tohelp you with, but unfortunately
we do need this step from you.
Gave him the next steps, saidthis is what we'll do.
(02:57):
Wished him a nice day, stayedvery professional, very
friendly, and pretty much justsaid goodbye.
she didn't really wait for himto say, yes, I'll do this.
She didn't wait for him to startanother argument.
She was very just to the point.
Matter of fact, professional,got the job done.
While making sure that he knewexactly what was required of
him.
And I think that's reallyimportant because that could
(03:18):
have gone a lot of differentdirections.
after that, I wanna talk aboutthe steps that she did and that
I did to finish quote unquotethe situation.
But first, let's talk aboutwhat's out there in the world of
dealing with this in management,dealing with this, from a
private practice standpoint.
So when it comes todeescalation, there's a lot of
great research out there.
(03:38):
The Crisis Prevention Institutehas some great things.
The Joint Commission has somerecommendations.
There's a whole section ofWorkplace VI violence prevention
in healthcare from theN-I-O-S-H.
and basically when I, when Ilooked at everything that they
were recommending, it came downto six major takeaways.
So I'm gonna give thosetakeaways to you, number one.
Stay calm andnon-confrontational.
(03:59):
Again, this is what my teammember did, and thank God she
knew how to do that, because Ireally think it goes a long way.
So your tone matters.
Your body language matters.
If you're in front of someone,even your posture like coming
off afraid or timid.
Those people are gonna walk allover us, right?
We have to make sure that we areone, exuding that calm feeling.
But two, they have to also knowthat we are still professional
(04:22):
and ultimately in control if youreally think about it, because
it's our workplace.
staying calm and professionalcan be very hard to do, and I
think every experience you havein these situations, you'll only
get better and better at it.
I've really learned this skillprobably only within the last
couple years.
as I'm sure some of you haveprobably heard in former
(04:42):
episodes, I went throughsomething kind of similar in the
workplace at my former job.
and it was actually anotheremployee that had been terribly
mistreated who gave me the wordsof wisdom to always stay calm
and non-confrontational duringthese conversations because I
was.
Always a little bit more afraidof them.
And so this person, oh mygoodness, she is just an
(05:04):
incredible person.
She told me, when someone isconfronting you and they're
doing it from a place of evil ormalice, and they're just quite
literally out of control, letthem sit in their own silence.
And I remember when she told me,I didn't quite understand.
And then when I did have ameeting with someone that was
treating not only me, but a lotof employees.
(05:26):
Wrongfully.
I literally just followed thatadvice.
I remember feeling like I wantedto be timid or feeling like I
wanted to, run from thatconversation.
I remembered it in the middle ofthat conversation and I decided
to, instead of reacting, insteadof even responding, if I was
asked a question, I literallyjust sat there and let like 10
seconds go by.
(05:47):
What happens when you do that topeople who are actively trying
to wear you down or break youdown?
one, they stumble over their ownwords.
Two, they say things they don'twant to say, and three,
sometimes they actually breakbecause at the core, when people
are treating us like this.
There's probably something elsegoing on in their life, and we
just happen to be the punchingbag that day.
(06:07):
And I know that's really hard tohear because working in
healthcare and in other areas,we do deserve respect.
But unfortunately, there's a lotof hard things in the world
right now, and a lot of peopleare having really difficult
times in life.
We could be the punching bag.
We still need to know how toreact to that.
We still need to treat peoplewith kindness, but I always like
(06:28):
to remind myself like this is areflection of them and what
they're going through, notnecessarily us.
So I do encourage you if youhave some of these patients in
mind, if someone's name isjumping to mind, this person
could be on your team or be apatient.
I think it's important to knowthat it's probably not a
reflection of you if you're notdirectly causing these issues.
Number two, always acknowledgethe emotion.
(06:50):
Don't acknowledge theaggression.
So if someone is lashing out atyou, don't yell back.
Please stop yelling.
Please stop yelling.
Or you're being disrespectful.
Don't acknowledge that.
Mention the emotions that are athand.
What my team member did wasimmediately like, Hey sir, I
understand you're frustrated, orI know this isn't what you
expected, but hey, here's how wecan fix it.
(07:10):
You're acknowledging thatthere's a reason for them to
kind of be upset, but you'realso letting them know like
they're taking it too far.
Number three, always set clear.
And calm boundaries.
If they're going wild with noend in sight, let them know
like, Hey, I would love toprovide you with a solution, but
I need you to let me talk.
or, Hey, I'm trying to help you,reminding them like they don't
(07:32):
need to keep yelling at you.
You're going to try to helpthem.
Number four, never interruptwhile someone is venting.
So again, my team member knockedthis one out of the park.
She literally sat on the phone.
For over five minutes and justlet this man one tear her apart.
But mostly the situation, butshe waited for him to be fully
gassed out.
(07:53):
I can't even imagine the kind ofemotional intelligence that
takes, but also the patience.
I mean, not everybody is cut outfor this.
and when you're in person it maybe a little bit harder, but it's
really important to just letthem finish.
Again, provide that silence andalso redirect when you're able
to.
So really important to notinterrupt.
(08:15):
Number five, always have asafety plan.
So in my practice, especiallyfor the in-person situations, we
have several panic buttons.
I believe three of them, indifferent locations of our
buildings, so that if things doget too far.
Quite literally, all they haveto do is press that button and
some form of law enforcementwill be there in less than 90
seconds, which is insane.
and the way that our panicbuttons are set up, you could
(08:37):
literally be touching it whilestill face-to-face with the
patient and they will have noidea what you're doing.
Or they could literally do someinternal communication, like
shoot a message to me or one ofthe providers and.
Say, Hey, SOS, this situation isgoing down.
You know, click the panic buttonor something like that.
There's a lot of ways to goabout it, but having some safety
protocols set up is reallyimportant as well.
(08:59):
And this is also why I like whenteams can be more together.
of course sometimes one personis left in the building, but
making sure that you're beingdiligent, about how to handle
problems when they arise.
And lastly, always know when toexit, especially if you just so
happen to be that last person onstaff or on call or the manager
on the floor at the time.
You are always in control.
(09:20):
before things get to the pointwhere they feel unsafe, you are
always able to say, Hey, youknow what?
This is a conversation foranother day, or I'm gonna pass
this on to my higher up.
that could be a manager, thatcould be a lead physician.
It could be quite literally theowner of a private practice.
this is your place of work.
if you own the building, likeit's quite literally your
business.
So a great way to close would belike, Hey, I understand that
(09:40):
you're frustrated.
I would love to talk about thisfurther, but I think we need to
do so when we're both more calm,I will get my manager involved.
Or I will get the owner involvedand then we can have this
conversation at a later time.
And then you literally, you canwalk away or you can walk them
to the front door and be like,Hey, here's the door.
Have a wonderful day.
We will be in touch regardingthis matter.
Again, taking control, but alsoletting them know, Hey, we're
(10:01):
not going to forget about thisor move on.
We're going to settle it.
So those are some of therecommendations that are
currently out there.
And if this hasn't happened toyou yet, one, I'm thrilled for
you, but it will happen.
This is very common inhealthcare, so.
I think now is the best time toprepare.
Make sure that you're familiarwith some of these scripts in
your head.
for a while when I opened, Iwent through a lot of different
(10:22):
scenarios, and it sounds crazy,but literally every time I was
in the shower, I would pick outa random scenario and think,
okay, what would I do as abusiness owner?
How would I handle my team?
How would I handle a patient andsome of these circumstances?
And it really helped me a lot Iwould literally verbalize this
stuff out loud so that when ithappens, I felt prepared, even
though I hadn't necessarily gonethrough it before.
(10:43):
an easy example would be when Ihad to fire someone for the
first time.
I literally practiced the wordsbecause those are words that
haven't naturally left my mouthbefore.
So how am I gonna know howthey're gonna come out if I've
literally never said thembefore?
I encourage you to do so now.
Don't wait for somethingterrible to happen.
Another thing I wanted tomention too is make sure that.
(11:04):
When it gets to that point wherethat patient one should probably
no longer be a patient, makesure you're just blaming
everything on policy.
Make it about the behavior athand.
Don't make it emotional.
So if someone has truly crossedthe line, quite literally
sending them an email and thenletting them know like, Hey,
this behavior really violates.
Our policies as a clinic when itcomes to the safety of our
patients' employees, andunfortunately we just aren't
(11:26):
sure that we're the right fitfor you anymore.
And then give them the names oftwo or three other practices
they can then transfer to keepit very professional, very black
and white, and it will save you.
I also recommend when somethinglike this happens, always,
always, always push it to theowner or the manager.
I like things to be owner led,have some direct communication
and you have to documenteverything.
(11:47):
I remember when I was working inhealthcare, you know, 10, 15
years ago, I.
It was all about phone calls.
So these kinds of things wouldhappen and we would call someone
to talk about it.
and I don't like that becausethen it's not documented.
And in today's world, we're justnot safe anymore when things
happen on the phone.
when things happen, they have tobe in writing.
If I have to do something viaphone, I will literally.
(12:07):
Type out an email the second Ifinish that phone call and send
it saying, Hey, just wanted toprovide a summary from our phone
call today, because again, ifit's not in writing, it
literally never happened.
I'm gonna add a script here foryou guys, and I'll post this on
social media, but, somethingsimple like shooting them an
email, especially if you weren'tinvolved like me.
I ended up reaching out to thispatient afterward and just
(12:28):
saying, Hey, as the owner, Ijust wanna let you know that I
take the safety and wellbeing ofmy team very seriously.
I was made aware of whathappened today, and I want to be
clear that this behavior is notacceptable in our practice.
We are always here to help you.
But respect is a non-negotiable,and that's a really good thing
to just get out there makingsure that this patient has been
contacted, because if this is a,becomes a repeat offender, you
(12:51):
have that in the past.
And lastly, this is a greatthing to add into your annual
training with your team.
So there are things that we cancover every quarter, every year
with our team.
And if you're ever looking for agood topic, to have one of your
employees present on this is apretty great one.
It could be a simple 15 to 20minute, kind of one-on-one
training or like a workshopwhere you kind of role play and
(13:11):
go through different scenarios.
So maybe one employee canprovide a scenario and then they
can practice some phrases.
To deescalate situations.
So some common phrases would be,like if a patient confronts you
with some verbal abuse or isvery intense.
here are a couple really easyresponses.
One, let's pause for a minute.
Julie.
I really wanna help, but you andI both need to speak
(13:32):
professionally and respectfully.
Number two, Julie, I understandthat this is frustrating, but
let's work on this together andcome up with a solution.
Number three, if we can't handlethis conversation respectfully,
I'm going to have to step away.
So again, deescalating thesituation.
Sometimes they don't evenrealize they're yelling.
Sometimes they don't evenrealize that this is poor
(13:53):
behavior.
Again, maybe this is how theytalk to literally everyone in
their lives.
So just by choosing a phraselike that, it reminds them like,
Hey, this is out of line.
And no one has probably toldthem that before.
So role-playing some of thesetough conversations during some
training can really help yourteam feel more comfortable.
Like I mentioned, I do this withmyself a lot.
(14:14):
as you know from formerepisodes, I am a business owner
who never wanted to be abusiness owner.
So when I.
Fell into this role.
I had to learn things that Inever thought I would have to
learn before, like how to handlesituations like this.
And so roleplaying can reallyhelp.
Like I said, I like to do minein my car.
You can stumble over your wordsbut try to find some time to.
(14:34):
Really make those phrases andsentences feel really
comfortable.
So final thoughts.
Remember that you areresponsible for your team.
At the end of the day, you haveto protect them whether you want
to or not.
And if you want to be a greatemployer, this is an absolute
must.
So I hope this information washelpful.
I hope if you're just in aperiod of a couple years where
(14:55):
everything has really beensunshine and rainbows.
Great, but let's not forget thatthese things can happen and
let's make sure we prepare.
I'm gonna put some links in theshow notes to some of the
deescalation tips from some ofthe resources that I listed.
Feel free to dive in.
If you have any crazy stories ofDeescalations that you've had to
go through and practice, I wouldlove to hear them.
I'm so proud of you guys.
(15:15):
This stuff matters and just bylistening here today, you are so
many steps above the rest.
Thanks.
Hey guys.
Have you ever been disrespectedby a patient?
And I don't mean just maybe likean inappropriate comment or
statement, but downrightdisrespectful.
Borderline aggressive.
I mean, we're talking likeactual probable verbal and
hopefully not, but sometimesphysical abuse.
These things really happen inthe workplace, especially in
(00:21):
healthcare.
And we had an incident that Iwanna talk about, this happened
a couple months ago, where oneof my team members, thankfully,
virtually, over the phone.
Was quite literally verballyabused by a patient.
She had to contact the patientbecause of a coordination of
benefits issue.
That means that claims weresubmitted.
Their insurance came back to ussaying, Hey, this patient
(00:42):
probably has another insurance.
So they weren't gonna processanything until that had been.
Set aside something like, youknow, the primary had been
changed or is no longer active.
Basically the patient had to bethe one to contact one of those
insurance companies and let themknow an update to their
insurance status.
That's something thatunfortunately, providers can't
do.
There's just no way for us to beable to do that.
(01:05):
so your only option is to tellthe patient, have them resolve
it, and then resubmit claims, orsometimes they'll just naturally
reprocess it.
so we call that patient to tellthem this.
It would've covered everything.
Maybe a low copay, one of thosesituations.
So we tried to tell him this,and in the process of doing so,
he just erupted on my teammember.
I mean, we're talking probably agood five minutes of yelling and
(01:29):
screaming and like.
Quite literally being rude toher face, making it seem like it
was our problem, that we didthis, we're we're at fault to
that kind of stuff.
Very different from like twopeople misunderstanding each
other.
This was quite literally verbalabuse, and definitely not the
kind of behavior you wouldexpect from someone you don't
even know.
Thankfully, I was very fortunatethat the team member that was
(01:51):
dealing with this is a rockstarShe has.
One of the biggest superpowersof being able to understand
social cues and how todeescalate situations and how to
handle people.
She's very body aware, verysocially aware, and just really
understands humans, and I cannotimagine if this had happened to
anyone else because I think shewas so prepared to handle it.
(02:14):
So before we dive into the nittygritty, I want to tell you
exactly what she did.
She literally let this manspeak.
You know, she tried to get acouple words in at first, but it
was very clear that he wasn'tgoing to let her.
And so she finally just let himdo his thing, and then when he
was finished and had no more gasleft in the tank, she just kind
of let the awkward silencehappen.
(02:36):
let a couple seconds of silence,just absolutely marinate, which
I think is really important.
And we're gonna tap into why inthis episode.
And then afterward, sheliterally just said.
Sir, I understand that you'refrustrated.
This is what we were told.
This is what we're prepared tohelp you with, but unfortunately
we do need this step from you.
Gave him the next steps, saidthis is what we'll do.
(02:57):
Wished him a nice day, stayedvery professional, very
friendly, and pretty much justsaid goodbye.
she didn't really wait for himto say, yes, I'll do this.
She didn't wait for him to startanother argument.
She was very just to the point.
Matter of fact, professional,got the job done.
While making sure that he knewexactly what was required of
him.
And I think that's reallyimportant because that could
(03:18):
have gone a lot of differentdirections.
after that, I wanna talk aboutthe steps that she did and that
I did to finish quote unquotethe situation.
But first, let's talk aboutwhat's out there in the world of
dealing with this in management,dealing with this, from a
private practice standpoint.
So when it comes todeescalation, there's a lot of
great research out there.
(03:38):
The Crisis Prevention Institutehas some great things.
The Joint Commission has somerecommendations.
There's a whole section ofWorkplace VI violence prevention
in healthcare from theN-I-O-S-H.
and basically when I, when Ilooked at everything that they
were recommending, it came downto six major takeaways.
So I'm gonna give thosetakeaways to you, number one.
Stay calm andnon-confrontational.
(03:59):
Again, this is what my teammember did, and thank God she
knew how to do that, because Ireally think it goes a long way.
So your tone matters.
Your body language matters.
If you're in front of someone,even your posture like coming
off afraid or timid.
Those people are gonna walk allover us, right?
We have to make sure that we areone, exuding that calm feeling.
But two, they have to also knowthat we are still professional
(04:22):
and ultimately in control if youreally think about it, because
it's our workplace.
staying calm and professionalcan be very hard to do, and I
think every experience you havein these situations, you'll only
get better and better at it.
I've really learned this skillprobably only within the last
couple years.
as I'm sure some of you haveprobably heard in former
(04:42):
episodes, I went throughsomething kind of similar in the
workplace at my former job.
and it was actually anotheremployee that had been terribly
mistreated who gave me the wordsof wisdom to always stay calm
and non-confrontational duringthese conversations because I
was.
Always a little bit more afraidof them.
And so this person, oh mygoodness, she is just an
(05:04):
incredible person.
She told me, when someone isconfronting you and they're
doing it from a place of evil ormalice, and they're just quite
literally out of control, letthem sit in their own silence.
And I remember when she told me,I didn't quite understand.
And then when I did have ameeting with someone that was
treating not only me, but a lotof employees.
(05:26):
Wrongfully.
I literally just followed thatadvice.
I remember feeling like I wantedto be timid or feeling like I
wanted to, run from thatconversation.
I remembered it in the middle ofthat conversation and I decided
to, instead of reacting, insteadof even responding, if I was
asked a question, I literallyjust sat there and let like 10
seconds go by.
(05:47):
What happens when you do that topeople who are actively trying
to wear you down or break youdown?
one, they stumble over their ownwords.
Two, they say things they don'twant to say, and three,
sometimes they actually breakbecause at the core, when people
are treating us like this.
There's probably something elsegoing on in their life, and we
just happen to be the punchingbag that day.
(06:07):
And I know that's really hard tohear because working in
healthcare and in other areas,we do deserve respect.
But unfortunately, there's a lotof hard things in the world
right now, and a lot of peopleare having really difficult
times in life.
We could be the punching bag.
We still need to know how toreact to that.
We still need to treat peoplewith kindness, but I always like
(06:28):
to remind myself like this is areflection of them and what
they're going through, notnecessarily us.
So I do encourage you if youhave some of these patients in
mind, if someone's name isjumping to mind, this person
could be on your team or be apatient.
I think it's important to knowthat it's probably not a
reflection of you if you're notdirectly causing these issues.
Number two, always acknowledgethe emotion.
(06:50):
Don't acknowledge theaggression.
So if someone is lashing out atyou, don't yell back.
Please stop yelling.
Please stop yelling.
Or you're being disrespectful.
Don't acknowledge that.
Mention the emotions that are athand.
What my team member did wasimmediately like, Hey sir, I
understand you're frustrated, orI know this isn't what you
expected, but hey, here's how wecan fix it.
(07:10):
You're acknowledging thatthere's a reason for them to
kind of be upset, but you'realso letting them know like
they're taking it too far.
Number three, always set clear.
And calm boundaries.
If they're going wild with noend in sight, let them know
like, Hey, I would love toprovide you with a solution, but
I need you to let me talk.
or, Hey, I'm trying to help you,reminding them like they don't
(07:32):
need to keep yelling at you.
You're going to try to helpthem.
Number four, never interruptwhile someone is venting.
So again, my team member knockedthis one out of the park.
She literally sat on the phone.
For over five minutes and justlet this man one tear her apart.
But mostly the situation, butshe waited for him to be fully
gassed out.
(07:53):
I can't even imagine the kind ofemotional intelligence that
takes, but also the patience.
I mean, not everybody is cut outfor this.
and when you're in person it maybe a little bit harder, but it's
really important to just letthem finish.
Again, provide that silence andalso redirect when you're able
to.
So really important to notinterrupt.
(08:15):
Number five, always have asafety plan.
So in my practice, especiallyfor the in-person situations, we
have several panic buttons.
I believe three of them, indifferent locations of our
buildings, so that if things doget too far.
Quite literally, all they haveto do is press that button and
some form of law enforcementwill be there in less than 90
seconds, which is insane.
and the way that our panicbuttons are set up, you could
(08:37):
literally be touching it whilestill face-to-face with the
patient and they will have noidea what you're doing.
Or they could literally do someinternal communication, like
shoot a message to me or one ofthe providers and.
Say, Hey, SOS, this situation isgoing down.
You know, click the panic buttonor something like that.
There's a lot of ways to goabout it, but having some safety
protocols set up is reallyimportant as well.
(08:59):
And this is also why I like whenteams can be more together.
of course sometimes one personis left in the building, but
making sure that you're beingdiligent, about how to handle
problems when they arise.
And lastly, always know when toexit, especially if you just so
happen to be that last person onstaff or on call or the manager
on the floor at the time.
You are always in control.
(09:20):
before things get to the pointwhere they feel unsafe, you are
always able to say, Hey, youknow what?
This is a conversation foranother day, or I'm gonna pass
this on to my higher up.
that could be a manager, thatcould be a lead physician.
It could be quite literally theowner of a private practice.
this is your place of work.
if you own the building, likeit's quite literally your
business.
So a great way to close would belike, Hey, I understand that
(09:40):
you're frustrated.
I would love to talk about thisfurther, but I think we need to
do so when we're both more calm,I will get my manager involved.
Or I will get the owner involvedand then we can have this
conversation at a later time.
And then you literally, you canwalk away or you can walk them
to the front door and be like,Hey, here's the door.
Have a wonderful day.
We will be in touch regardingthis matter.
Again, taking control, but alsoletting them know, Hey, we're
(10:01):
not going to forget about thisor move on.
We're going to settle it.
So those are some of therecommendations that are
currently out there.
And if this hasn't happened toyou yet, one, I'm thrilled for
you, but it will happen.
This is very common inhealthcare, so.
I think now is the best time toprepare.
Make sure that you're familiarwith some of these scripts in
your head.
for a while when I opened, Iwent through a lot of different
(10:22):
scenarios, and it sounds crazy,but literally every time I was
in the shower, I would pick outa random scenario and think,
okay, what would I do as abusiness owner?
How would I handle my team?
How would I handle a patient andsome of these circumstances?
And it really helped me a lot Iwould literally verbalize this
stuff out loud so that when ithappens, I felt prepared, even
though I hadn't necessarily gonethrough it before.
(10:43):
an easy example would be when Ihad to fire someone for the
first time.
I literally practiced the wordsbecause those are words that
haven't naturally left my mouthbefore.
So how am I gonna know howthey're gonna come out if I've
literally never said thembefore?
I encourage you to do so now.
Don't wait for somethingterrible to happen.
Another thing I wanted tomention too is make sure that.
(11:04):
When it gets to that point wherethat patient one should probably
no longer be a patient, makesure you're just blaming
everything on policy.
Make it about the behavior athand.
Don't make it emotional.
So if someone has truly crossedthe line, quite literally
sending them an email and thenletting them know like, Hey,
this behavior really violates.
Our policies as a clinic when itcomes to the safety of our
patients' employees, andunfortunately we just aren't
(11:26):
sure that we're the right fitfor you anymore.
And then give them the names oftwo or three other practices
they can then transfer to keepit very professional, very black
and white, and it will save you.
I also recommend when somethinglike this happens, always,
always, always push it to theowner or the manager.
I like things to be owner led,have some direct communication
and you have to documenteverything.
(11:47):
I remember when I was working inhealthcare, you know, 10, 15
years ago, I.
It was all about phone calls.
So these kinds of things wouldhappen and we would call someone
to talk about it.
and I don't like that becausethen it's not documented.
And in today's world, we're justnot safe anymore when things
happen on the phone.
when things happen, they have tobe in writing.
If I have to do something viaphone, I will literally.
(12:07):
Type out an email the second Ifinish that phone call and send
it saying, Hey, just wanted toprovide a summary from our phone
call today, because again, ifit's not in writing, it
literally never happened.
I'm gonna add a script here foryou guys, and I'll post this on
social media, but, somethingsimple like shooting them an
email, especially if you weren'tinvolved like me.
I ended up reaching out to thispatient afterward and just
(12:28):
saying, Hey, as the owner, Ijust wanna let you know that I
take the safety and wellbeing ofmy team very seriously.
I was made aware of whathappened today, and I want to be
clear that this behavior is notacceptable in our practice.
We are always here to help you.
But respect is a non-negotiable,and that's a really good thing
to just get out there makingsure that this patient has been
contacted, because if this is a,becomes a repeat offender, you
(12:51):
have that in the past.
And lastly, this is a greatthing to add into your annual
training with your team.
So there are things that we cancover every quarter, every year
with our team.
And if you're ever looking for agood topic, to have one of your
employees present on this is apretty great one.
It could be a simple 15 to 20minute, kind of one-on-one
training or like a workshopwhere you kind of role play and
(13:11):
go through different scenarios.
So maybe one employee canprovide a scenario and then they
can practice some phrases.
To deescalate situations.
So some common phrases would be,like if a patient confronts you
with some verbal abuse or isvery intense.
here are a couple really easyresponses.
One, let's pause for a minute.
Julie.
I really wanna help, but you andI both need to speak
(13:32):
professionally and respectfully.
Number two, Julie, I understandthat this is frustrating, but
let's work on this together andcome up with a solution.
Number three, if we can't handlethis conversation respectfully,
I'm going to have to step away.
So again, deescalating thesituation.
Sometimes they don't evenrealize they're yelling.
Sometimes they don't evenrealize that this is poor
(13:53):
behavior.
Again, maybe this is how theytalk to literally everyone in
their lives.
So just by choosing a phraselike that, it reminds them like,
Hey, this is out of line.
And no one has probably toldthem that before.
So role-playing some of thesetough conversations during some
training can really help yourteam feel more comfortable.
Like I mentioned, I do this withmyself a lot.
(14:14):
as you know from formerepisodes, I am a business owner
who never wanted to be abusiness owner.
So when I.
Fell into this role.
I had to learn things that Inever thought I would have to
learn before, like how to handlesituations like this.
And so roleplaying can reallyhelp.
Like I said, I like to do minein my car.
You can stumble over your wordsbut try to find some time to.
(14:34):
Really make those phrases andsentences feel really
comfortable.
So final thoughts.
Remember that you areresponsible for your team.
At the end of the day, you haveto protect them whether you want
to or not.
And if you want to be a greatemployer, this is an absolute
must.
So I hope this information washelpful.
I hope if you're just in aperiod of a couple years where
(14:55):
everything has really beensunshine and rainbows.
Great, but let's not forget thatthese things can happen and
let's make sure we prepare.
I'm gonna put some links in theshow notes to some of the
deescalation tips from some ofthe resources that I listed.
Feel free to dive in.
If you have any crazy stories ofDeescalations that you've had to
go through and practice, I wouldlove to hear them.
I'm so proud of you guys.
(15:15):
This stuff matters and just bylistening here today, you are so
many steps above the rest.
Thanks.
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