3 The importance of how we communicate

Each human soul has a center from which the soul forces flow, and to which others are constantly responding. This is the command center governing the laws of communication and, on a lower level, our ability to cooperate and get along…Let's explore the importance of how we communicate.

So in what ways do we break these universal laws? Turns out, it’s not that hard to do. It’s what happens whenever we are overeager and overanxious—when we don’t just desire communication, we crave it. Then our soul forces get pushy, automatically becoming harsh, pointed and rigid. Their movement is jerky; their impact is too strong. The other person’s soul center will feel like it’s being punched…

If someone communicates in an aggressive way, the other is going to withdraw…Nothing slams the door quicker on another soul than when they catch wind of our unconscious monster cravings. Seeing this can take the sting out of what seemed a personal rejection. Their unconscious soul forces merely did what they needed to do to reestablish a little balance…

This has happened to all of us at one time or another, when we either were on the end of having an exaggerated need, or we felt sucker-punched by someone else’s. Ironically, even if we want to respond with loving communication, we can’t help but repulse such a forward-surging motion...A childish, exaggerated craving is not in the same ballpark with healthy love. Further, the former is the actual reason that we keep striking out when we go to bat for the real thing...

We often waffle back and forth between the extremes of exaggerated need and withdrawal. Oddly, we sometimes try to pursue both alternatives at the same time. Just, you know, to be on the safe side. No wonder we feel torn in two, with our strength sapped. No wonder we’re not walking on sunshine…

We blame outer events for our hopeless situations, when they are the natural result of our inner state which we ourselves have put into play…We’ve got to ferret all this out personally, seeing how we’re the ones who are disrupting benign laws that seek nothing more than to keep us walking in a straight line…

We can follow the breadcrumbs of our inner wounds to see how they originated in this lifetime from early disappointments. It’s because we haven’t come to terms with them that we are still trying to overcome them…Once we see and understand all these puzzle pieces, we’ll be able to let go of the exaggerated need. We’ll find that it was an illusion all along…

Learning this is a game-changer. It repositions us from being dependent and needy, to be being ones who begin to genuinely communicate.

Listen and learn more.

The Pull, Chapter 3: The Importance of How we Communicate

Read Original Pathwork® Lecture: #80 Cooperation, Communication, Union