Homeschooling, Hard Work, and the Staffing Mastery Journey - Dan Mori

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What if homeschooling were the entrepreneurial version of education? 

In this perspective-shifting conversation, Dan Mori, Managing Partner of Staffing Mastery, explores how rethinking traditional approaches to parenting and education has transformed his family's life.

Dan shares his journey from initial skepticism about alternative schooling to becoming a passionate advocate, explaining how his wife's entrepreneurial framing helped him see education differently: "Entrepreneurs find better, more efficient ways of doing things. With homeschooling, you can learn how your kids learn and put them in programs that spark their interests." This customized approach has allowed his three children to pursue their unique passions - from parkour and skateboarding to performing arts.

The heart of this episode revolves around meaningful life lessons passed from one generation to the next. Dan recounts a powerful story from his childhood about his mother teaching him that "it's not what you give, it's what you sacrifice" - a principle that guided him and his brother to donate their favorite toys to a family who had lost everything in a house fire. This lesson in empathy continues to shape how he parents today.

Perhaps most valuable is Dan's insight into understanding each child's unique needs. He shares a breakthrough moment helping his son with a science project, where he discovered his son needed visual learning rather than written instructions: "I need to do a better job taking a step back and trying to understand the individual needs of different people in my household, and meet them where they're at versus where I think they should be." This distinction between expectations and agreements forms a powerful framework for better communication with our children.

Connect with Dan on LinkedIn to learn more about his work with Staffing Mastery and the Staffing Sales Summit, where he helps staffing industry professionals improve their sales practices through actionable insights and peer learning.

Please don't forget to leave us a review wherever you consume your podcasts! Please help us get more dads to listen weekly and become the ultimate leader of their homes!

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Hi, I'm Riley and I'm Ryder and this is my dad show.
Hey, everybody, it's CaseyJaycox with the quarterback dad
cast.
Welcome to season six, and Icould not be more excited to
have you join me for anotheryear of fantastic episodes and
conversations really unscriptedand raw and authentic

(00:25):
conversations with dads.
If you're new to this podcast,really it's simple.
It's a podcast where weinterview dads, we learn about
how they were raised, we learnabout the life lessons that were
important to them, we learnabout the values that are
important to them and really welearn about how we can work hard
to become a better quarterbackor leader of our home.
So let's sit back, relax andlisten to today's episode on the
Quarterback Dadcast.

(00:45):
Well, hello everybody.
It's Casey Jaycox here withQuarterback Dadcast.
We're in season six and theguests continue to get better.
No offense to season four orfive one, two, three, four, five
but it's been fun just to watchthe growth of this podcast grow
.
The theme is still a consistent, a blank white piece of paper,
if I can speak English, andwe're going to let curiosity

(01:07):
drive this conversation.
And our next individual I metthrough the wide world of
LinkedIn.
His name is Dan Moore.
He's the managing partner ofStaffing Mastery.
He also hosts a staffing salessummit, which I learned about.
I actually had two clients sendsome of their folks there Shout
out to you Ben, shout out toyou Scotty and I heard great
things about what they're doing.
He and I met, did a littlepodcast swap, and so now we're

(01:28):
going to turn the tables andwe're going to learn about not
only Dan, what he's doing atStaffing Master, which is really
helping a mentor and helpleaders take their game to the
next level from a KPIperspective, a mindset
perspective, and really justhelping them improve their sales
best practices in staffing.
But that's not why we're havinghere.
We're going to have you here tolearn more about Dan the dad
and how he's working hard tobecome the ultimate quarterback

(01:49):
or leader of his household.
So, without further ado, mrMorey, welcome to the
quarterback dad cast.
Casey man, it's an honor to behere and while I'm always
excited to talk shop, I love thefact that we're going to get a
chance to kind of look behindthe scenes and really talk about
the reason that we do all thecrazy things that we do in the
work world, so we can actuallyshow up for our families.

(02:10):
So good, well, we always startout each episode gratitude.
So tell me, what are you mostgrateful for as a dad today?
The thing I'm most grateful foras a dad today is having the
flexibility to really use altschooling or alternative
schooling for our family, and mywife does an amazing job.

(02:31):
You know curating educationalexperiences for my three kids
and you know we both get toengage with the school program
that they're a part of, which isa Montessori-based program in
South Florida that they get toparticipate in.
But then we get to put them inso many different programs that

(02:51):
give them a wider range of reallife experiences.
And you know I was listening tomy son who, ironically, they
just had a podcast exercise intheir class where he and his
buddy, who is a former publicschool kid they actually
podcasted about the differencesof what is the experience of a
public school middle schoolerversus an old school middle

(03:13):
schooler and what does that looklike.
And they got to chat back andforth about that and hearing
their viewpoints definitely gaveme pause to be grateful that we
have the flexibility and wehave the lifestyle that allows
our kids to kind of participatein things that a lot of others
won't get to.

(03:34):
So I'm grateful for my wife andthe work that she does and my
kids getting to participate inthe all-school model, because it
really works for us.
That's so cool.
I already want to ask questionsabout that.
I'm curious.
But what I'm grateful for isjust the state of my life.
I have a freshman in collegeand a junior in high school and

(03:56):
we have one that's like Ryder,my son.
It's just crazy to see thegrowth he's continued to have
and it's been so rewarding andfun.
So I'm grateful for thatjourney he's continued to have
as and it's been so rewardingand fun.
So I'm grateful for thatjourney and also grateful for my
daughter is, I say, a scrappypoint guard, shooting guard,
loves defense, and she's juststarting her.
I would thank her.
Some of her recruiting journeystarting to pick up.

(04:20):
She's going to visit a collegetonight.
She's going to, has a callschedule tomorrow with another
college and she's like what thehell?
Like?
I remember like this littlesix-year-old doing skid outs on
her bike in my part, in my drive, and now she's talking to
colleges and it's like, andshe's mentally ready to go.
She's like yep, three o'clocktomorrow.
Dad, can't wait.
It's crazy, man.
The days are long, the yearsare short, right, 100, that that

(04:41):
is true.
Well, well, bring me inside theMaury Huddle and tell me how
you and your wife met and thentalk about what each child is up
to these days.
Yeah, no, absolutely so.
My wife and I actually met atthe gym.
She was a kind of youth andfamily director of a YMCA in

(05:03):
upstate New York and I had beenthere and we had a mutual friend
that introduced us and, yeah, I, I pursued her, she, she, she
played hard to get but shefinally, I'm persistent.
I don't know if it's a salesbackground but I am tenacious,
but yeah, we finally.

(05:24):
We finally made it work andhave been a crazy journey, I
think, the ups and downs and thecurve balls that life throws at
every couple, but we've stuckit out and we've got an amazing
life and kids 13, 13-year-oldson, 10-year-old daughter,
eight-year year old daughter.

(05:44):
And again, we've been veryfortunate to move around a lot.
We do snowboard between NewYork and Florida, primarily
living in Florida most of theyear now, and that was a journey
.
That was a bit of a shock to thefamily because we moved here
for a business reason and it'skind of a neat story where we

(06:08):
had kind of put down some roots.
Our kids were very young inupstate New York and we were
just starting to like thinkabout starting the school
journey in Montessori.
And my employment agency had anopportunity to acquire a
company in South Florida and Iwas like you know, it's kind of
far, like I feel like we shouldmove just six months to a year
just to make sure thateverything goes smooth.

(06:29):
And so we did.
We moved down here in Decemberof 2018.
And like, okay, this is greatOn a year lease and, honestly,
six months in Casey, the officehere didn't even need my
presence.
Like they were a well-oiledmachine, great systems in place,
good leadership, all that stuff.
Like they were just they wereusing the system.
And so when our lease was up inDecember of 2019, we were like

(06:53):
like Florida was pretty nice,not going to lie, like the
weather is amazing.
I'm like do we really want togo back to New York in December?
I'm like no, we don't.
So we asked our landlord likehey, can we just extend our
lease six months and we'll goback to New York in the summer?
And he's like, no problem.
Well, six months later, it wasJune 2020 and the world looked
starkly different and we had adecision to make like where do

(07:13):
we want to ride the pandemic out?
Do we want to do it in SouthFlorida?
Do I do an upstate New Yorkfamily?
Like it was a lot.
It was a hard decision to makebut we finally decided like
let's primarily stay in southflorida.
We did buy a different house innew york with more land and
outside country and stuff, butwe made the decision to stay
here and ride the storm out,ride the pandemic out, and our

(07:35):
kids put down rooms, they metfriends, they got involved with
programs and we built an amazingcircle of friend group here.
That it's so cool.
All the the parents like we,they all have kids kind of like
the same, you know, uh, genderand age range, so it all sort of
works out with.
All of our kids have a greatgroup of friends but the parents
all have like interestingentrepreneurial jobs.

(07:55):
It's kind of amazing how we allfound each other and it's been.
It's been really cool and mykids are again a little bit of a
alternative, like my son, notmuch of a team sport guy, you
know.
It's amazing Like I lovehearing the story of your kids
and kind of going that route andfollowing in the footsteps of a
dad.
But like my kid, like my sonXander, he's parkour, it's his
primary sport.

(08:16):
Like he loves parkour, lovesskateboarding, loves surfing.
You know, like he's definitelya kid, that you're probably
going to turn on X Games andyou'll see, like the stuff that
he likes.
And you know my daughter's,like they love gymnastics.
My middle daughter is aperformer.
You know she's been working inthis, this play program for a
year, almost coming up to put ona production here in a few

(08:38):
weeks to of Annie, and it's herfirst time really stepping out
and doing something like this.
So it's been an amazing journeyto watch her grow into this
role and, amazingly, even thoughit was her first time doing it,
like she was like so close towinning the lead, uh, and I
think her lack of experience wasthe only thing that held her
back, cause, like her rawpotential and talent is there,
um, so they're all different man, so that's just, I don't know.

(09:01):
That's that's uh, that's our,our world and we're working on
science projects right now.
It's it's just a fun time to tobe a dad in this family now.
Was mom a performer growing upor dad a performer growing up.
Neither man.
My wife, my wife can sing.
She's got an amazing voice butshe never really uh, I don't
think she had the opportunitiesgrowing up to to really pursue

(09:22):
that.
Yeah, and she's, uh, she's.
She's more athletic as well,but we grew up out in very rural
communities with limitedopportunities to really explore
like alternative sports oralternative avenues, like we all
had like the very basic, youknow, softball, baseball,
basketball, that kind of stuff.
Um, someone was shocked tolearn that my school didn't even

(09:43):
have a football program like it.
It was a tiny little school,right.
So so no, neither, neitherperformers growing up, but I
think the kids got the talentand they've got the opportunity
to to explore it.
Wow, very cool.
Now, how many is it consistentevery year when you guys go back
to New York, like the time ofyear, or is a difference never

(10:04):
consistent?
Man, last, last year, last year, my kids were like we want to
experience summer in Florida.
It's like what?
Like nobody wants to experiencesummer in Florida?
And they're like, no, we do,because all of our friends go to
these camps and we don't get togo.
We got to go back and we'relike all right, you know, we'll
do that.
So last year we primarilystayed in Florida most of the
summer.
We went and visited a little,but we were only in New York

(10:24):
probably maybe a few weeks inthe summer and split up a little
bit.
So it's we, we truly.
It's not a, it's not ascheduled cadence, like we kind
of go when we think it makes themost.
This year we're going to begoing for a longer stretch.
We've got some goals, we've gotthings we want to do, uh, in
New York, so we're gonna spendmore time there.
We've got some goals, we've gotthings we want to do in New
York, so we're going to spendmore time there.

(10:45):
We've made some plans alreadyto meet up with family and
friends, so we'll be there inNew York longer this summer.
But no, we make it up as we goalong.
Man, we take what life hands usand we do the best with it.
Now, were you guys always theschool route you went, or were
you initially public school anddecided to get out?
So we're always the route thatwe went, and I was the biggest.

(11:11):
I guess I was the mostreluctant because, like I'm a
product of public school, Ididn't know anything different.
You know, like when I was fouryears old, my parents stuck me
on the yellow school bus andthey sent me off to school and
that's all I knew.
And I again, small community,like I went K through 12, all in
one building, casey, like therewas literally 300 people in the
building and that includes likestaff and lunch, ladies, like
it was a.
It's all I knew.
My, my, my primary education,you know bubble, was very small

(11:36):
and I hadn't exploredalternatives.
And my wife, you know she inschooling, she got a part of her
degree was like primaryeducation, early childhood
education, so she was moreworldly, more knowledgeable
about this.
And she was like, hey, I reallywant to do homeschooling.
You know, I think that's thepath to go.
And I was like I'm not gonnalie, man, like when I heard that

(11:58):
, like I had the stigma, Ithought a little house on the
Prairie, which I've actually nowbeen exposed to the books and
all this stuff, and realizedlike that's actually they did
pretty well.
But I was like, I was like Idon't know, like I don't want
our kids to be like the sociallyawkward kids.
And my wife was like what?
Like?
She's like, are you kidding me?
She's like, do you even knowwhat homeschooling is these days

(12:20):
.
And I was like, yeah, you knowwhat?
You're right, I guess I don't.
I guess I was making anassumption and it was an
ignorant one, you know.
Um, so help me understand.
And she started telling me aboutall these cool programs and she
was explaining it in a way andI'm not going to lie, even still
like I'm judging it off my ownbias, like I think people do in
their everyday lives, right, andI'm like, okay, and I'm, I'm

(12:40):
manipulating what she's sayingin my head to fit the bias or
the understanding that I have ofthe world.
And then she said it in a waythat connected and she goes
homeschooling is like theentrepreneur version of public
school.
And I was like, wait what?
I was like what do you mean bythat?
Because I've always identifiedas a business owner, as a
business entrepreneur, and likecarving my own path.
I was like what do you mean bythat?

(13:01):
And she goes entrepreneurs arepeople that typically find
better ways of doing things,more efficient ways of doing
things, sort of a different, newway that works best for them
and maybe a certain group ofpeople.
And if you look at publicschooling, it was built on a
very production line way it wasdesigned to kind of get to the
average.
They teach a very and again,I'm generalizing the general

(13:23):
public school system, right, Iknow there's great teachers out
there and there's good schoolsout there, but generally
speaking it's the same systemdesigned to move similar aged
kids at a similar path about theaverage student, you know,
teaching a very similar way,which is actually more auditory,
and most learners are notprimarily auditory, right?

(13:44):
So it's like as you're, as youstart to learn this and she's
like with that, like withhomeschooling, you can actually
learn how your kids learn andyou can actually learn what
they're interested in and putthem in programs that spark
their interests, nurture theirinterests, but also teach it in
a way that connects with them.
And I was like I was like, wow,I never really thought about it
like that.
So my, my son, actually startedlike that.

(14:06):
Our entry point for my son was aMontessori program in upstate
New York and it was amazing andthis was my first exposure to
not having similar age kids justgo together in a group, like
because in Montessori they do itin kind of like three-year
blocks.
So my son went in and heactually started a year after.
So he was kind of in the middleof lower elementary but he was

(14:27):
in with, like kids that were ayear younger than him and a year
older than him.
And there's this process ofwhich is amazing because it
actually aligns with how I teachof awareness, comprehension,
mastery.
So when you're you come in thefirst year of their kind of
grade group, like you're justgetting aware, you're being made
aware of the concepts and thework, and then, kind of in the
middle, you're like gettingcomprehensive, you're
comprehending the concepts,you're understanding it, but by

(14:49):
the time that you're in that toptier, you're, you're learning
mastery of it and you have todemonstrate that mastery by
coaching the two youngergenerations that are not
generations but ages that are inthat class before you really
move on.
And I was like that makes a tonof sense to me.
So that was my firsteye-opening thing.
And then we explored all school.
And then we got to Florida.
They had a lot more opportunityfor all schooling features,

(15:12):
enrichment programs, academicprograms than what we had even
in our little community, upstateNew York.
So yeah, and then once we met atribe of friends that had
similar beliefs and, you know,kind of want to pass for their
kids.
We just kind of stuck with itand we're still.
Every year we're evaluatingwhat do we want our kids to
learn, what areas do we wantthem to, you know, improve in,

(15:34):
what opportunities do we want toexpose them to?
What's important to us fortravel, finances, like, we look
at that stuff as an entirety andthen we will find the programs
that best fit what we want forour kids and what we want for
our family.
So, um, but yeah, that's,that's been our process and it's
been really rewarding.
Wow, how often, how much do yourkids get involved with the

(15:55):
program selection?
A ton, absolutely A ton.
Yeah, no, we sit them down andwe talk to them and we're open
with them about the financialcosts of things and the
trade-off to say, hey, if we dothis, you know, like the, the
program that, uh, this thiscurrent school year that we're
in, um, it's a five day program.
My kids actually, uh, my twoolder kids, go four days to one

(16:17):
program and then we actuallyhave them in a different program
a fifth day.
Uh, my youngest goes, doestruly homeschool with my wife on
one day, three of the five daysof one program and then goes to
the other program with her twoolder siblings, but they're in,
like they know, like, hey, thisis what these are the pros like,
this program is going to bereally strong academically.

(16:37):
It's going to be a little bitmore rigid.
There might be some homework,there's going to be some field
trips.
You know this is the costassociated with it, but you got
to commit to it, you know.
So if you're going to be here,you can't do these things.
If we're going to pay for this,we might not be able to do this
right.
Like we try to explain all ofthat stuff we talk about if
there's going to be friendsthere or not friends there, what
teacher styles might be, likelocations, drive time, you know,

(16:59):
transportation, yeah, we,honestly, we just expose them to
all of that and then we workthrough the decision making
process with them.
We do give them input, but theydo understand at the end of the
day that you know, sarah, mywife Sarah and I have the final
say.
But yeah, we include them, man,we want them.
If you think about it, casey,like kids, they get so few

(17:23):
opportunities to honestly makedecisions, you know, and if, if
you don't let your kids makedecisions growing up and they
have to learn how to makedecisions as adults.
There's a chance they might bepoor decision makers and they
might make some bad decisions.
So we I, my wife and I havealways believed that if we let
our kids have opportunities tomake decisions along the way and

(17:43):
we give them full autonomy oversome of the smaller decisions
like how do you want to haveyour hair you know like some
parents will be like no, it'sgot to be cut.
No, like no, it's your hair.
Like you decide what, but youknow, whatever they decide, they
got to follow through with it.
Like that's a big thing for us.
So, yeah, no, we, we involvethem in the entire process.
We think it's an important partof learning and development.
Uh, this is cool.

(18:04):
So when you, when you talkedabout your growth, um, where you
had to like get curious andlike get out of your own way a
little bit, when you like, whichI love, I mean to me I think
that checked the ego.
Yeah, you leaned in on yourvulnerability, leaned in your
humility, and then you lean intoyour curiosity, which I think
are life's superpowers.
Those are things I teach, Ilook for, I'm obsessed with that
.
People know me, um, did thatexperience when we went through

(18:27):
2020 with like so much changearound obviously the COVID
shenanigans, but like I think,just the social unrest and
diversity did that.
Did that help that experienceimpact you at all?
Just how your mindset changedof like homeschool?
No, it didn't really changemuch with our perspective with
homeschool.
What I thought was reallyinteresting about that is that

(18:49):
the social awareness andadoption of homeschool changed,
right, I think, even though Iwas fully in the camp of
homeschool and looking at it asand we weren't, we weren't truly
true nature homeschool becausewe did programs we engaged in,
so it's really, I say, allschool, but even still it had a
stigma.
People looked at all school asa very periphery thing and not

(19:12):
the norm.
But when the pandemic happenedand everybody had to figure it
out, right, like homeschoolingor all schooling, became more
acceptable and it became like analternative path, like, hey,
maybe this is better for my kidsand I think there's a lot of
kids that never went back.
You know their parents realizedthere was other methods of
learning and it's, it's funny,even in our, in our, uh, in our

(19:33):
group we have, you know, we wereall schoolers before it
happened, so like we stayed thatpath but we had friends that
their kids came out of publicschool and they went along kind
of the same track with our kidsand they're together this year
and then now they're going to gointo, I would say, a private
school that is like one stepaway from public school.

(19:54):
It's very structured, you know,so they're kind of getting back
to it.
Another friend they went backinto the public school system.
We had friends that you knowthey came on the old school
model and now they're going backto public.
So it's, I think it openedtheir mind that like, hey,
there's just different paths andit it really you got to find
what's right for your family andyour kids.
So I don't think it changed my,my mind too much there, because

(20:15):
I'd already had it changed.
And kind of the point aboutchecking your ego, one of my
favorite new phrases right now,because I love rhymes, is your
ego is not your amigo is rightnow, because I love rhymes, is
your ego is not your amigo.
And I heard that recently andI'm like, oh, that's so good, so
I do.
Well, that's cool, mel, I love,I love the story I'm learning.

(20:36):
I'm curious.
So to go back in time a littlebit, the old flex capacitor from
back to the future.
Now I was like learning about myguests, like what was life like
growing up for you and talkabout the impact your parents
had on you.
Now that you're a dad, yeah, nofor sure.
Life was very different for methan it is for my kids.
So I grew up in a working classfamily.

(20:58):
You know my dad was a bluecollar guy.
You know he worked in a factory.
Dad was a blue collar guy, youknow he, he worked in a factory.
My mom was an admin in a in aschool.
You know she worked in aprogram that was kind of catered
towards guiding and supportingmisguided youth, you know.
So she was really subject tosome of the the troubled child

(21:21):
you know troubled children inthe program.
She was just like an admin inthis program, so she would see
it.
But they were both very workingclass people.
I believe I was probably 10 whenthey divorced and I think when
that happened, because we were aworking class family, like I
became a bit of a latchkey kidand I think I believe that that

(21:42):
lifestyle I didn't.
We didn't have much but we hadenough.
Like my brother and I.
We recognize that, like ourparents, you know they worked
very hard.
There was never a doubt thatthey, that they didn't love us
Right, like we knew right, andthey did their best to provide
for us and I think you know,looking back on it, I have a
greater appreciation for thelessons that they instilled upon

(22:04):
us.
You know about, obviously, hardwork.
You know and following throughand and setting your own
standard.
You know and like weird stuffmy dad used to say sticks with
me.
Like the only place you startat the top is when you're
digging a hole.
Um, like that stuff hits.

Speaker 2 (22:19):
Now I'm like I didn't get it, then you know.

Speaker 1 (22:21):
but wise man, yeah, you know, and it's like you hear
this stuff.
So, but I think they inherentlyI don't think intentionally,
but inherently they taught usgratitude.
You know, my a lesson that thatmy mom taught me a long time
ago.
We were doing this can driveman, and I'll never forget this.
I was probably gosh.

(22:42):
I was probably somewherebetween eight and 11 years old.
We're doing this can drive forthe scouts, and I lived out in
the country.
This isn't like in city livingwhere you can go hit up a
building and hit, like you know,30 doors in 10 minutes, like I
had to walk to get door to doorto solicit cans and go collect
these.
And I'll never forget my momhas taken me and, I think, my

(23:04):
brother with us, with us as well, and maybe one of our other
scouting friends, and we'rewalking, and we're walking from
door to door, not in the country.
It is hundreds of yards betweendoors, you know, sometimes I'm
up to a mile.
It gets a long way and, asyou're a kid, you're like, oh my
god, this is awful, why are wedoing?

Speaker 2 (23:19):
I'm gonna die.

Speaker 1 (23:20):
My feet hurt.
Yeah right, I'm like coming upwith every single excuse to try
to get out of this and cut itshort.
And what do we see, man?
We see another group of kidsfrom the same uh pack of Cub
Scouts and their dad is drivingthem in a truck and they're all
sitting in the back of the truckand they're all having fun and
they're just driving Right.
And I'm just like I was likewhy can't we drive, like, why

(23:43):
can't we do that Right?
And in my mind I'm thinkingthat would be way more efficient
was get.
We'd get done the quicker.
And my mom said this thing tome and it stuck with me.
Even today.
I'm like it stuck with me.
She goes it's not what you give, it's what you sacrifice.
I was like and in the moment itdidn't really hit me and I'm
honestly man, I'm gettinggoosebumps just thinking about
what this actually means,because over the years she would

(24:03):
say it again.
That was the first time shesaid.
I'm like what the hell doesthat mean?
Right?
Like it's not what you give it'swhat you sacrifice and I, over
the years she started to connectthat to me that, like, some
people can give, and if theygive from a place of abundance
and it doesn't really impactthem, then it might not be that
meaningful.
But if somebody gives somethingand it's actually a sacrifice

(24:26):
for them, the gift is moremeaningful.
And I'll, and just to, I'll,drive this point home and this
is a kind of to put the pin inthe question my brother and I we
were, you know again, littlekids and it was right around
christmas time.
Right, it was right afterchristmas, I think.
Maybe a day or two afterChristmas and we had heard the
story.
Our mother told us a storyabout a nearby family that their

(24:47):
house burned and they losteverything.
Right, kids like just lost alltheir toys, like the thank God
the family was safe, but theylost everything just a couple of
days after Christmas.
And we were thinking can youimagine what that would be like?
You know, christmas, you're soexcited as a kid, you're getting
all your toys.
You're still two days removed,like everything is still kind of
new, you're still lovingeverything you know, and then
it's all gone, right, it's likeholy cow.

(25:14):
So my mom was doing like a toydrive and like asking like, hey,
you know, are there any oldtoys that you guys you know
maybe just replaced or you don'tuse anymore because you got
this new stuff?
Is there any toys that youwould like to give to these kids
?
And I kid you not, and in themoment I didn't think about this
, but as I look back I'm likethis was the lesson that she had
been instilling in me.
My brother and I each gave ourfavorite toys.
His was an airwolf helicoptermodel this is going to be dating

(25:36):
and mine was actually it's kindof goofy to say this but it was
this old toy called Elfie andit was like a robot that you
could put these cards in andthere was buttons and like it
was kind of educational and likeit was nerdy, because like I'm
a nerd.
But we gave these and my momwas like wait, these are your
guys' favorite toys.
She's like we've got all theseother toys.
Like like, why don't you?

(25:56):
And they're like no, and likethis is what we wanted to give,
because we knew how much thosetoys meant to us and we felt
what those kids must be feeling,you know, not having anything,
and we wanted to give themsomething that to use a today
term that would move the needle,that would have an impact.
So we each gave our favoritetoy, not out of coercion but
because that's the feeling thatwe wanted these kids to have in

(26:18):
the wake of losing everything.
And in that moment it was likemy mom must've been, like super
proud mom, thinking okay, it'snot what you give, it's what you
sacrifice.
And so, yeah, that's.
Those are just some of thelessons that you know I try to
impart on my kids and they giveme the same eye roll that I'm
sure that I gave my parents backin the day and I hope that it
sticks.
I hope that they show a levelof appreciation for this old man

(26:44):
wisdom someday.
And it is, it's working.
I was actually just in aparent-teacher conference this
morning.
My wife and I went down to meetwith the teachers that kind of
manage the Friday program for myson and just hearing his
progress on like math andreading and all this stuff.
And you know they were talkingabout like a specific
relationship with one of hiskind of friends there and it

(27:05):
sometimes gets tense and youknow and like they were talking
about how my son navigatesthrough that and then how he did
something that seemed like inthe moment seemed a little bit
uh, his teacher was trying tohelp him with a problem and my
son was like I know, I know, Iknow, I got it.
It was like very short and likea little bit disrespectful and
the teacher was like, okay, heneeds some space and back off.
But later that day my sonactually went back and was like

(27:26):
hey, you know what I I'm sorry,that was rude and unprompted,
unsolicited.
So like my wife and I were likecause you don't get to see that
stuff as parents, right, likeyou, you preach it and you don't
see it at the house, but liketo know that it's sticking makes
a difference.
So I feel like maybe some ofthose lessons that my wife and I
learned as kids from ourparents that we're imparting,
maybe they're starting to takeshape, but yeah, that's some of

(27:50):
the early day stuff there.
Well, not only did she you guyslearn hard work, follow through
gratitude, but I think you alsolearn empathy.
That was the biggest word.
I wrote down that story, yeah,I mean have an empathy for
others.
And and I found even like soI'm almost 50 and I think
stories I always tell, even likemy business stuff.
I always tell I tell clientsstory, sell slides, don't.

(28:10):
Yeah.
That same mindset for kids.
It's like if you're going to,if you're going to tell my, if I
want to teach my kids a lesson,or if I want to tell a client,
hey, what to do, I always say,tell me, would it be helpful if
I shared a story around when Iexperienced that.
So then you lead with your ownkind of like, hey, I'm going

(28:32):
first, let me tell you where Isucked.
So then they and I find thatthey're much more ready to learn
it.
So like you, you, you beat metoo, cause I was going to ask.
I'm like God, I hope you'retelling your kids these stories.
Yeah, oh, they've heard it.
They've.
They've heard a lot of the kidsstories and like, oh, I wish I
could have grown up in theeighties.
I'm like you know, I only tellyou the highlight reels.

(28:56):
There's a lot of things aboutgrowing up in the eighties that
aren to disney world is thefirst time I went to disney
world, okay, and you did it atfour months and I don't know how
old I was.
I was 32, right.
So like you.
So, but yeah, I do I tell thestories and I try to you know,
let them know that you know, Iwas a kid once and I can relate.
I've been on the journey and,um, sometimes they get it and

(29:16):
sometimes I get the eye roll,but it's all good.
Yeah, it's um.
You know, we, when we grew up,we didn't grow up, we were
middle class, and so ourvacations were camping, I love
yeah yeah, I love camp bikes andthe.
You know you get in the camperand like I'm talking the old
school camper with that, likethe two poles that came down the
back of the chevy to kind ofyeah, yeah, you have the over

(29:38):
the top thing.
Yeah, if people know I'mtalking at home there's like
imagine a bed on top of thecamper where I'm driving I'm,
I'm like, I'm like a pilot, I'mseeing the.
Yeah, you know.
So not safe.
No, not safe.
You would not, would not betolerated today.
So I'm aware of those.
My rich friends and growing uphad those I had.
We had a tent.
I was one of your rich friends.

(30:01):
Yeah, you're on my.
You could have was one of yourrich friends.
Yeah, you could have been oneof my rich friends, man, that
would have been cool.
That's funny.
Are mom and dad still with us?
So my mom is, my mom is.
Unfortunately, my dad passedaway gosh 22 years ago.
Yeah, he did not win the fightwith cancer, man, it got him and

(30:30):
but still, even to his verylast breath, was imparting
wisdom and lessons on me aboutyou know not, not succumbing to
societal norms and not just youknow going along, because that's
what people say you should do,or it seems right, like you know
, just finding your own way inthe world and making your mark
on the world.
Um, but freaking hate cancer fyou can't man it sucks, but you
know what, even when I washating it and even when I was

(30:50):
bashing it and all of that stuff, and it lit I, I kid you, not
like the day before he took hisfinal breath, like he was like
listen, stop.
He's like, stop being sodepressed and sad that I'm
leaving, he's like.
And when I leave, when I'm gone, he's like stop being so
depressed and sad that I'mleaving, he's like.
And when I leave, when I'm gone, he's like do not be sad that
I'm gone, celebrate that I washere.
He's like remember that I washere, do not?
He's like if you spend time anytime being sad because I passed

(31:12):
, you'll have missed the mark.
And I'm like what do you meanby that?
He's just like.
He's like listen, life, it'sfleeting.
We all know it's going to end.
This is no surprise.
It's a surprise when it comes.
But you never had, it's neverguaranteed.
We're up, but the death isbecause it's all of it.
It's always going to end and ifyou focus on being sad over the
ending and you miss the pointof being happy and joyous and

(31:34):
celebrating the fact that itexisted in the first place and
all of the good stuff thathappened, is like you're
focusing on the wrong part.
So don't be sad that I'mleaving, be happy that I was
here, and what do you think thatthat's?
That's some wise stuff, man.
I mean, where do you think thatcame from?
For him, bro?
My dad was.
My dad was a broken man and hada hard life.
He actually, uh, he was one ofeight kids.

(31:54):
Uh, obviously he was born inthe fifties, you know.
So he grew up at kind of a someturbulent times in the United
States.
It's like generations werechanging and clashing and all
that stuff, and like people weretrying to figure out who they
were.
But at eight years old, heprobably had the most
transformational thing as anentire life happened to him and

(32:15):
he decided this was the day thathe was not going to come right
home after school, that he wasgoing to stay out and play with
friends, even though he wassupposed to go home after school
and he had every other time.
This was the day that he stayedlate and did not go right home
and by the time he made it home,he found his mom passed away of
a heart attack on the floor andeven though he was eight and

(32:39):
even though everyone was like,listen, like even if you would
have got home on time, itwouldn't matter.
He never, he never relinquishedthat um, that guilt.
He never let himself off thehook, for he carried that with
him his entire life and I think,I think in that moment, because
he understood and he learnedover over time that life is not

(32:59):
guaranteed, that you can goanytime, you know, and I think
he learned a greaterappreciation and gratitude for
it, and even though he carriedthat guilt with him and there
was nothing anybody could do orsay to get him to release it, I
think he used it in a lot ofways to feel that wisdom and
then maybe almost try to tellpeople to not feel the anguish

(33:21):
that he probably carried withhim his entire life, because he
probably hated how it made himfeel and he likely didn't want
anyone else to feel that way.
So he's like don't carrysadness or, you know, don't
mourn my passing.
You know, be happy.
And he was always ahappy-go-lucky guy, like this
dude was.
You know, full of life, full ofenergy, could brighten any room
, you know.
But so I think it probably cameout of life.
Full of energy could brightenany room, you know, but I think

(33:41):
it probably came out of thedespair of his own childhood.
Wow, seems like he was in thewrong job.
Bro, shouldn't have been in thefactory, should have been
selling stuff.
Man, he would have been good atit.
He, he.
I swear the gift of gab is thegift from my dad and he.
But you know what, though, thething is, is he had an

(34:03):
opportunity, like he was abuilder, he was a craftsman,
like he actually had an amazingopportunity to go live a dream
and go build, do carpentry overin Australia, like to do a crew
for a year.
But he and my mom had just metand my brother I don't know if
my brother had just been born orwas like on the way, I'm not
sure exactly the timeline ofthat, but he had this option Do

(34:28):
I go do this thing or do I stayon and put down roots and
support a family?
And at the time, you know, in asmall town community, the
biggest employer was a, was afactory and they were paying the
best they were, they weregrowing, so they were looking
for so the job.
That was easy to get the job.
And then, once you get in, youget hooked, you know, and so he
was.
He was 100 in in the wrongcareer and he made the decision
purely out of the obligation toto to provide a stable income

(34:52):
for his family and um, but yeah,he I'm glad.
I'm glad that he didn't,because probably if you went a
different way, I wouldn't behere.
But at the same time I thinkI'd make that sacrifice because
I think that he could have had amuch different and healthier
life and but who knows, you know, life is, we get what we get,
man, you know.
So everything else isspeculation.

Speaker 2 (35:12):
Hi, I'm Betsy Robinson, ceo of Tier 4 Group, a
women owned and diversitycertified technology recruiting
and executive search firm thatconnects exceptional talent with
extraordinary companies in 43states across the US.
At Tier 4 Group, relationshipsare at the heart of everything
we do, whether it's with ourclients, our candidates, our

(35:35):
vendor partners or with eachother.
Our mission is to go beyondtransactions and create
long-lasting partnerships.
We don't just help companiesfind talent, we help them find
the right talent, and thatstarts with truly understanding
our clients and candidates.
It's not just about fillingroles.
It's about fostering successfor the long-term.

(35:56):
This is the recipe for successthat's landed us on the Inc 5000
six consecutive years and hasus outpacing our competition
across the country, and I'mthrilled to support Casey Jay
Cox's podcast.
Casey's philosophy alignsperfectly with ours prioritizing
relationships over transactions.

(36:17):
His insights on building trust,empathy and connection resonate
deeply with the way we dobusiness at Tier 4 Group.
We were honored to have Caseyas our keynote at our 2024
kickoff, and all of our newhires read his book Win the
Relationship, not the Deal, whenthey start here with us.
So if you're looking for apartner who values relationships

(36:39):
as much as results, visit us attier4groupcom or connect with
me, betsy Robinson, directly onLinkedIn and, while you're at it
, keep tuning into Casey'spodcast.
You'll walk away inspired tostrengthen your own
relationships, both personallyand professionally, and, as
Casey always says, stay curious.

Speaker 1 (37:00):
Does your brother have kids?
He does, yeah, he's got one kid.
My, your brother have kids?
He does, yeah, he's got one kid.
My nephew is 19.
Okay, yeah, and do you everreflect on the conversation you
and I have had today?
Do you and your brother everreflect on the impact?
Like we've been talking abouttoday?
Not as often as we probablyshould.

(37:23):
I think that, um, my brother andI and I love him dearly and if,
like, he needed anything, likeI've got his back we're very
different people.
We've we've gone on our lives,have gone on very different
trajectories.
Um, he's uh, and I don't know,some would probably say we're
envious of each other becausehe's got this ability to be very

(37:44):
content.
You know, he's like, hey, I'vebuilt this life.
He's very happy, he's verycontent.
Um, for me, I've I don't knowif it's a gift or a curse, but
I'm very driven onto the nextthing and build and grow, and
build and grow.
Um, and you know, I think thatsometimes he's like I'm envious
because you've accomplishedthese things, but the other side
, he and you know, I think thatsometimes he's like I'm envious
because you've accomplishedthese things, but the other side
, he's like you know what, likeyou've had to do a lot of stuff

(38:06):
that I didn't have to do, youknow, and I'm envious, going
like man.
It would be awesome to just belike I'm content with my life,
like this is cool, becausesometimes I'm always like what's
the next thing and that's a.
That's a character flaw of mine,but no, we don't actually get
to reflect probably as often aswe'd like and I think since
we've we've moved away, we seeeach other even less.
You know, we only see eachother a couple of times a year.

(38:28):
But, yeah, we're we're, we'renot as tight.
I think he plugs in more to hisfriends and I plug in more to
my friends.
But he's a good dude.
You'll never find a dude thatthat works harder and and works
harder and cares more for hisfamily and doing the right thing
and just having fun and beingcontent.
Honestly, when I look at it,it's like this is my dad, which

(38:48):
is kind of a spitting image ofhim.
They were thick as thieves.
These two, my brother and mydad, were like best friends and
it shows so he's a fun guy thatlikes having fun and living his
life on his terms and terms andand being completely content
with things.
So, um, yeah, he's a good dude.
Yeah, that speaks to me alittle bit.
I, you know, I, I think leavingcorporate after 22 years ish.

(39:18):
And then this entrepreneurialjourney that found me that I did
not mean to do it's, I'm notcontent, I'm just a lot more
present with it.
And I wasn't.
I mean, I was very present as adad when my kids were young,
when I was at K-Force, but Ijust it's like another level of
being present now.
Yeah, where I value, I just puta lot more high value on family

(39:39):
moments or time with my kids,because my kids are.
I got one in college and onethat's going to be out in a year
, so there's a lot of times if,like, if I have an opportunity
to do something with my daughteror my son I hate to say it
clients I might move you.
Oh yeah, I can, because I'm theboss.
And if, if that works and I'mnot very respectful about how I
do it, but, like to me, I'm likethese opportunities are not

(40:01):
going to be there always.
Now, there's some days I can't,but like, yeah, I don't know.
No, I'm the same way and that'sthat's that's what I prioritize
, you know.
And when I mentioned thingslike building and driving, it's
like the family plan, you know,and it sounds crazy, but like my
wife and I think about like,okay, what?
Like kids, like we want them to, you know, start a little

(40:22):
further than we did.
So like, okay, we buy realestate, like that will help them
out, like they might not haveto buy a house when they get you
know of age, or if they don'tlike the house, like they can
sell it.
And you know, like it my people, they know that I prioritize

(40:42):
family and events over all else.
And I it just happened earliertoday I actually I was my wife
and I were having an amazingconversation with my son's
teachers and like the meetingwent long.
I just text a guy that I washaving on staffing monthly and
I'm like hey, you know, parentteacher meeting went long.
You know, can we bump 30minutes?
And he responded.
He responded back.
He's like you know what, man,absolutely.

(41:04):
Because, like, that's the stuffyou should be focused on.
He's like these moments, likeyou just said, casey, these
moments are fleeting.
And he's like so, no, youshould absolutely prioritize
that.
And in that moment I realizedthese are the people I surround
myself with my clients.
They think the same way, theyprioritize the same thing.
So they don't care if I bumpthem for family.
The people I interview onstaffing monthly, the people I

(41:26):
choose to give my time to, likeyou like, like, we understand
this, if I and I think I had tobump this one, we actually we
were scheduled a different timeand I actually had to bump
because I picked up a carpool,you know, for my family.
So, like I, I will, I'm I'mroutinely playing not
necessarily routinely, butoccasionally playing calendar,
jenga or Tetris, um, becausefamily stuff comes up and you

(41:48):
got to prioritize it because itis fleeting and, frankly, if not
for that, the work stuff, it'spointless Gold, my man, I love
it.
Um, if you were to pick onyourself, um, or or like you're
you're watching film with yourdad game, you said man, dan,
this is an area I'm talking toyourself in the third person Dan

(42:08):
you need, we need to work onthis as a dad, because we know
this is not where you want to be.
But let's be honest withourself and we're going to
commit to being better at thisas a dad, and I can lead you.
First, mine was always patience.
I've become way more patientever since doing this podcast
six years ago.
Now, some might disagree Ithink I've become more patient,
but tell me what scenario yourdad game that you're still

(42:29):
working hard to become thatbetter leader quarterback your
home.
I love that question.
I I think for me, um, to be morecurious, discerning and
understanding of the unique anddifferent needs of each person
in the household.
You know, sometimes we interactwith people and we assume that

(42:52):
they view the world through thesame lens that we do, or that
they have the same bias as we do, but they don't, because
they've had different lifeexperiences, they've got
different emotional baggage.
We do, but they don't, becausethey've had different life
experiences, they've gotdifferent emotional baggage and
um, but because we assume thatwe think that what they need is
what we would want in theirparticular situation.
So that's what we give them andand we missed the mark

(43:13):
sometimes and it can leavepeople unheard frustrated, you
know, uh, invalidated, and Ithink sometimes being able to
step back and just trying tounderstand, like frustrated, you
know, invalidated, and I think,sometimes being able to step
back and just trying tounderstand, like, okay, what is
it that they need?
And if I can't figure it out,being, you know, humble enough
to ask it in a way that showssincere desire to learn and not

(43:36):
just check a box, you know, andwhat my wife might need day to
day could be very different thanwhat my son needs or my
daughters.
You know, they're all differentpersonalities, different life
experiences.
And, to kind of drive this home,this just happened a couple of
days ago.
I was my son and he's work.
He's got a science project.

(43:57):
The final demonstration iscoming up in a week or so and he
, he, I feel like, took on alittle bit of an ambitious
project and that's a somethinghe gets from me like he dreams
the world and then tries to makeit be um, but he was like he's,
like I want to figure out howto pedal a bike and create
enough power to play a nintendoswitch for 10, right, and it's

(44:21):
not super ambitious of a project.
But for him that's kind of athing and like his classmates
didn't really kind of go likepiecing together power systems
and figuring out how to do this.
So I'm a systems guy, you knowthis.
So I'm like, okay, well, thisis what we need to do.
We need to think about what areall the pieces of your system.
And I let him do the researchand figure out what needed to be
.
I'm like, okay, well, we haveto convert this into watt hours

(44:44):
because you need to figure, weneed to, like, create a common
denominator how many watt hoursdo you need to power the switch?
How many watt hours do you needto power the, the docking
station that will charge theswitch?
How many watt hours to powerthe monitor that you want to
display it, on and so on and soforth.
And so I literally created aworksheet and I gave it to him.
I was like, here's the math.
I showed him the formulas and Iexplained it to him.

(45:05):
And I get to the end and he'slike well, I said, what do you
want me to do?
And I was like just do the math.
He's like what math?
And, casey, in my mind, I'mlike I just explained the math
to you.
What do you mean?
What template?
So I go back to the lab, right,and I create step-by-step
instructions.
You know, go look at, you knowthe amps on this and look at you

(45:28):
know the time that you want todo and do, like, do the formula,
and I spell everything outstep-by-step, literally like
line-by-line instructions onexactly what to do for every
piece of the system.
He's like, okay, and I, Icovered this with him and he's
like, well, he's like I'm notgetting it.
What, what do you want me to do?
And I'm like the math and I'mgetting a little bit frustrated.
And I could tell he's gettingfrustrated and about to check

(45:48):
out.
And I'm like, and I take a stepback and I realized this, this
lesson that I'm trying to learn,and this is an example of like,
a little bit of progress.
But I'm like, okay, he's got adifferent need than I would have
in this moment For me.
Like I would get it, I wouldsee the temple, I would see the
instructions and I would be ableto follow this.
But for some reason he's got adifferent need.
So I just asked him.
I took a step back and I askeda question curiosity, right,

(46:10):
like the theme of your show.
And I'm like, I was like whatis it that you hear?
Like what is going on in yourmind?
When I'm explaining, when I'mtalking to you, what's going on
in your head?
Because I sense you'refrustrated.
It's starting to make mefrustrated.
Neither one of us want to befrustrated.
We both want to have fun doingthis.
And he goes when you're talkingto me, I'm just trying to

(46:32):
visualize everything and I can'tvisualize it.
And I'm like visual learner.
I knew that, I knew this abouthim, but I didn't apply it to
this situation and that was aneed that he had and I was
meeting it in a different waythat I thought was satisfactory.
We flipped it over blank pieceof paper and we just drew out
the entire system.

(46:52):
And I drew out, I put the sameformulas, just in a diagram form
showing the circuit.
I was like I just need you tofill in these blanks.
He's like like oh, this makescomplete sense to me, and like
that.
And he knew all the answers newpower flow and like electricity
yield through each part of thesystem.
And he got it because I drew itfor him and that was a need

(47:14):
that he had, that had I'd nottaken a step back to try to
figure that out.
So that's, that's my dad QB,like game tape.
I need to.
I need to do a better job oftaking a step back and trying to
understand the individual needsof the different people in my
household and meet them wherethey're at versus where I think
they should be, based on my ownbiases and lens that I see the

(47:34):
world.
If it makes your son feelbetter, I wouldn't have followed
it either.
I'm a visual learner and I dude, I dude, I.
I'm like the least handiestperson united states history,
but I'm a great, I'm a hardworker and and I, once I see
what we're doing, then I, yeah,now I know what we're supposed
to do.
I just don't have the mind togo like, hey, we're gonna build

(47:54):
this like um a-frame awningextended off our roof, that's
gonna do this.
I'm like, no, we're not, that'sgonna immediately fall down my
son can figure that out.
Man, my son has got like, andall my kids are just says we're
on the top of my son, like theyall got these unique gifts.
But him visually like this andI know this about him like casey
, he would go to sleep at nightand he'd wake up first thing in

(48:17):
the morning and he'd be like Igotta go build this thing.
I dreamt about this thing and Igot to go build it with Legos
and it would be like aKingfisher bird, right.
It would be like somethingwhere there's not a Lego set for
it.
It would be like a manatee,right, and he would go and he'd
be in his room and he'd clickety, clack and he'd come out and he
would have like a replica toscale manatee or a Kingfisher

(48:38):
bird or whatever.
I'm like man, like how do youdo that?
He's like I just see it in myhead and then I put the pieces
together, right, and it's likethat's that's how he is right.
My, my, my daughter, my middledaughter, is a little bit more
verbal.
Like she needs like to to read,but then also like hear the
words, right, and which also tome it's like maybe that's why,

(48:59):
like, she's so good at likeperforming and singing, like
maybe that's where that.
I don't know how that ties in,but so yeah, it's, it's a
journey man, it really is, and Ithink that the more that we
learn about the others that wecare about in our lives, I think
the more that we learn aboutourselves, and it gives us an
opportunity to grow and becomebetter, more well-rounded people
.
Well, I think, whether we'redads or husbands or partners or

(49:24):
leaders, you got to meet peoplewhere they are and if you don't
meet people where they are withcuriosity.
You're, it's your.
To me it's a recipe fordisaster and frustration Cause
like.
One of the things I learnedabout my journey of life is like
the difference betweenexpectations and agreements.
Expectations usually sit in myhead and then I assume that
you're a mind reader, which noone is.

(49:45):
I'd be guessing people's way atthe fair if I did that.
But an agreement is hey, are weclear about what the
expectation is?
Maybe have some kind of writtenemail back and forth.
Same thing with the kids hey,my expectation is you're going
to get the dishwasher unloadedby 4 o'clock.
We have an agreement.
Or like with Riley, my daughter, like recently.
I just said hon, I know wetalked about.
I said first ask question.

(50:06):
I go do you remember what wetalked about before you leave
your room in the morning.
He said not a big deal, but itis a big deal to me.
I said we, we agreed that whenyou leave your room you're gonna
open up your blind, you'regonna make your bed every day.
That's it.
That's my expectation for youto live here.
Do we have an agreement?
And dude, the last two days,when I come upstairs, like, like
for a break during work, I'mlike I love it and I think

(50:27):
sometimes it's like you know, um, she's don't.
You know now the differencebetween recognition and
appreciation.
Recognition, she's not going toget a, hey, we're going to get
blizzards.
Hey, you're going to get ajelly the month club.
But I can say, hey, hon, Ireally appreciate you falling
through on that.
Like that's appreciation whichtakes five seconds of time, that
we as parents can do, we asleaders can do, but sometimes we

(50:48):
just don't think about itbecause we're going way too fast
.
Yeah, you know, yeah, I lovethat man, I'm going to take that
away.
Like that distinction betweenexpectation and agreement, I
think that's a powerful one andit ties so well with a statement
that I tell pretty much anyoneI talk to that all stress in

(51:08):
life is caused when expectationsdon't match reality.
And if you think about it, ifyou think about every time
you're stressed out and you'relike good or bad, it's because
there is a difference betweenexpectations and reality.
And I think, in a sense ofnegative stress, if we have
expectations and not anagreement and then reality shows

(51:28):
out and it's different from theexpectations we had, it creates
stress, whereas an agreementcould have, could have bridged
that gap before that negativestress as a chance to actually
kind of toxify our life.
So I love that.
Thank you for sharing that.
Well, thank you for saying that, because now you just get so.
I've been doing these Fridayvideos or last like six weeks or
so, five weeks or so, and a lotof it was changed.
This is like kind of like backto the LinkedIn world of work.

(51:52):
I was working with a client andthey were like too nervous to
do it.
I was like, listen, I'll do avideo with you.
We're going to we video.
People appreciate that's theway you can build a relationship
with somebody to show, showwhat you're up to, whatever.
And I said you, show whatyou're up to whatever.
And I said you, either weeither can be comfortable on the
sidelines or we're going to beuncomfortable in the game and
the only way you learn is bythrowing interceptions missing

(52:13):
that putt falling off your bike,like, let's listen, I'll go
first.
I'm going to tag you, so you'regoing to do it, I'm going to do
it.
It might not be perfect, butwho cares?
But I'm going to my video thisweek that we're in April,
everybody.
This video is going to be onexpectations versus agreements,
so I'll make sure I tag you asinspiration.
I love it.
Okay, before we get into someof the work you're doing,

(52:33):
because I want to make surepeople learn about staffing
mastery, if you were tosummarize everything we've
talked about, that a dad cantake away, like maybe two or
three actionable themes thatthey can maybe reevaluate their
life or their mindset to bemaybe a different or better or
just a different, maybe leaderin their home that might drive
some more positive results.
Based on our conversation today,tell me what comes to mind.

(52:55):
I would say, first and foremost, I think it's important for
dads to understand that you knowthe title of dad you know and
husband are you know the top oneor two titles that you'll ever
have in your life, and I thinkyou need to treat it with that
level of respect and I thinkthat you need to think about if

(53:16):
you're a process system person,like I am and you, you have a
high level, of high standard andyou like accountability, like.
Think about the term dad, likea job description, and look in
the mirror.
Don't be afraid to look in themirror and say, hey, am I, am I
doing the job, not just checkingthe box, but I'm excelling at
the job, and then actually, youknow, define like, what do you

(53:37):
want to be as a dad?
And then you would use some ofthose things that we talked
about that are those littletools that help you get better
as a dad.
Be present, prioritize it.
You know, don't, don't, andeven be thinking about how you
engage with your kids.
You know, like be present, putthe phone down and show them
that you're focusing on them.
You know, like those littlenuanced things like be present,

(53:59):
be actively present as a verb,be present in their lives, be
present in the household, leadthat household, lead by example.
You know, and I think doingthose little things, like you
know, setting the expectationand agreement, like I think that
is so huge.
Teach those life lessons thatmight seem cliche to you, but
it's not what you give, it'swhat you sacrifice.

(54:20):
Like those are the core valuesbeing instilled in your kids and
you can't teach them too much.
You know this is not corevalues, are not shaped in one
and done statements.
You know they're.
They're, I guess, exhibitedevery single day.
So I think the biggest takeawayfor me is just be present,
prioritize this, because Iguarantee, once this phase of
your life passes, you're goingto wish you were back.

(54:41):
You're going to wish you couldhave it back, and so do the best
you can this time.
Love it, dude.
That's some gold, okay, so ifpeople want to learn more about
staffing mastery, they want tolearn more about the staffing
sales summit.
If they're in the staffingindustry, they're an executive,
they're a leader, they're aseller, tell me why do they want

(55:01):
to learn about this?
And then where can they learnabout this?
Yeah, so do the quick blurb onStaffing Mastery.
Staffing Mastery is just myoverarching consultancy.
So if you're in the staffingindustry and you're looking for
peers that you want to share thejourney with and you want to
learn systems or learn how tokind of better scale your
company, that's really what I dowith Staffing Mastery.

(55:23):
If you really want to focus onsales improvement from a sales
leadership or sales producerlevel, that's why we created the
Staffing Sales Summit.
There's a massive need, casey,if you think about it, last year
was the first year in a reallylong time that the industry
flagged sales as the biggestchallenge, and it was more than

(55:45):
10 years ago, back to the GreatRecession, the last time that it
was flagged as the biggestchallenge.
Right, and it was more than 10years ago, back to the great
recession, the last time that itwas flagged as the greatest
challenge and that period oftime.
Some of your best producershave moved on, they've moved up
the ladder, they're no longerthere and the people that you
have in the trenches sellingtoday, they don't know, they are
not equipped to meet the momentthe way that they need to.
So I saw this.

(56:06):
It was a need that I honestly,I wanted to have solved.
I had that same challenge.
I'm like where do you go to aconference to get trained up at
scale with actionable insights?
And I go to all the conferencesand I love them.
They're amazing for what theyare.
But anytime any conference putsa sales topic on there, it's
usually one block on the agenda,high level topic, and you

(56:27):
usually leave the sessionthinking, okay, that's great,
I'm excited, but what do I dowith it?
Right, and then when you goback, because you don't have an
answer to that, you do nothingand it became a waste of time
and aspirational at best, and Ijust I don't like that.
I want people to havemeaningful impact or meaningful
change in their lives, because Itold you, I came from a working
class family man Staffing thisindustry.
It has given me a life beyondwhat I possibly could have

(56:50):
dreamed of as a kid.
The life that my wife and Ihave, and our kids.
It would not be possiblewithout the staffing industry.
So I am grateful for it and Iwant other people to be able to
benefit from it the way that Ihave.
So we created the summit,staffing Sales Summit.
We've had it two years in a rownow, in February in Orlando.
We are going to have anotherone in February 2026 in Orlando

(57:12):
at Margaritaville.
If you want to check it out,google Staffing Sales Summit you
can go to the RSVP page.
If you got show notes, I'llgive you a link.
They can just click on it andyou can get signed up.
You'll be notified when ticketsopen up.
It will sell out.
It sold out the last two years.
It will sell out.
Tickets are capped at 120.
But if you want to get a flavorfor it, if you're like, hey,

(57:35):
you know, I want to see whatthis thing is about without
actually making the commitmentto buy a ticket, we're actually
having an encore event that'sfree to attend.
We're bringing back four of thespeakers from this past Staffing
Sales Summit Joey Frampas fromButler Street, mark Winter from
Winsource, mike Bradbury fromType Marketing and Alexis Meske
from Aura Marketing, and they'regoing to be covering four

(57:56):
really important topics, withMike and Alexis talking about
social selling how do youimprove your reputation online.
And then how do you improveyour reach so you can get more
people to see that reputationthat you're an expert.
And then also with Mark Wintertalking about sales enablement
how do you actually start toweave marketing and sales
together?
Because if you're doing salesin a silo, you're going to fail.

(58:17):
This time it's not going towork the same way that it used
to.
And then Joey Framp is kind ofhitting the leadership track,
talking about how do youactually intertwine leadership
with producers, with technologyand process, and how do you make
sense of this crazy changingworld today as a leader.
So we're bringing that back.
That's actually going to beJune 17th Again.

(58:40):
We'll get links out for thatfor people to see.
So if you want to see what it'slike but I guess my quick and
dirty summary on it is if youfeel like you want your sales
operation improved in yourstaffing business, regardless if
it's a producer level issue ora leadership level issue or an
ownership level issue you can goto the summit, you can get the

(59:02):
absolute best sales content.
Everything is required toprovide actionable insights.
They do not get on my agendaunless I know what the
actionable insights are thedeliverables that you're going
to get and you're going to beable to leave this event with
something that you can implementand see positive results.
That's not just me saying it.
Two years in a row, on a fiveout of five scale, our

(59:23):
actionability hit 4.8.
Our speakers level ofengagement and connectivity was
4.7.
So I mean we're ranking really,really high on this piece of it
and our NPS score is 100.
On the event, every singleperson that attended said they
would recommend it to a friend.
We had people that broughtteams that said man, the entire

(59:44):
investment to get my team thereis already paid for itself with
the stuff we learned andimplemented.
So if you're looking to growand scale and you think you need
to improve your sales to dothat, the summit is the only
event to be out there for andthat's why we created it,
because we want companies to winand succeed.
So cool dude, love it.
Yeah, make sure we will linkthat in the show notes when this
episode comes out If peoplewant to follow you.

(01:00:07):
Linkedin, I'm sure, is a greatspot.
Are there any other socialchannels that you're on?
So the only two that I'll askis please connect with me on
LinkedIn, follow me.
I put out a lot of contentaround this.
If you like the idea of salesand strategy and metrics and
KPIs and you're a data geek likeme, or you like the art of
sales, follow me on LinkedIn.
Connect with me.

(01:00:27):
Shoot me a message, say hey, Iheard you on Casey's show.
That would be super cool.
The other one I would begrateful if you would go to our
YouTube channel for staffingmonthly at staffing monthly on
YouTube and subscribe to thechannel If you like this kind of
content where you get thoughtleaders just talking about
actionable concepts that's whatwe do every month in Staffing

(01:00:47):
Monthly and go check out theshow and subscribe on YouTube.
That would be amazing.
I will make sure those are bothlinked in the show notes.
It is now time, dan, to go intowhat I call the lightning round
.
This is where I show you thenegative hits of taking too many
hits in college not bong hits,but football hits.
Your job is to answer thesequestions as quickly as you can,

(01:01:08):
and my job is to try to get agiggle out of you.

Speaker 2 (01:01:10):
Okay, that's pretty easy, I laugh a lot.

Speaker 1 (01:01:12):
Okay, true or false.
Your favorite NFL team is theMiami Dolphins False, false.
Okay, if you were to.
If we were to revisit yourchildhood and look at your most
prized possession of, like asystem you built it's the flex
capacitor.
False, that would have beenpretty cool.
If it was true, though, itwould have been cool.

(01:01:32):
That would have been cool.
Um, favorite movie of all time.
Oh wait, this is not true orfalse.
I thought you're gonna listen.

Speaker 2 (01:01:39):
I shook you up.

Speaker 1 (01:01:40):
What is?
What is your favorite movie ofall time?
Oh, man, I.
I suck at this because I likeso many different things.
Uh, I really like gladiator.
I love, remember the titans.
Um, man, I.
How?
About comedy, my favoritecomedy?
Oh my gosh, jeez.
I love comedy movies, but Ican't.
Elf, maybe I love the movie elfwith will ferrell.

(01:02:00):
I think he's hilarious.
I uh, yeah, I don't know, Ilike that.
Uh, the Wilson brothers thoseguys are funny.
And even Jason Bateman I thinkhe's hilarious.
His sense of humor, um, yeah, Idon't know.
I love movies in general, man,so it's so hard for me to pick a
favorite.
Tell me the last book you readBuy Back your Time by Dan

(01:02:21):
Martell.
Okay, if I came to your housefor dinner tonight, tell me what
you and Sarah would make me.
Okay, if I came to your housefor dinner tonight, tell me what
you and.
Sarah would make me.
Oh man, uh, that's a greatquestion actually, because I am
working on a science projecttonight, so I just asked my wife
earlier today, uh, to take overuh food duties, and I believe
we're gonna be on trauma tacoTuesday.
There we go which means I'llstill be making my guac because

(01:02:43):
I make a killer guac.
Oh that sounds, that soundsyummy.
I love good guac.
If there was to be a bookwritten about your life, tell me
the title.
Oh my gosh, I don't know.
I would basically say the wayto systematize your life, to
enjoy the life you want.
I don't know, I got nothing onthat one man.
Why don't we shorten it?

(01:03:03):
We'll call it the power ofsystemization.
I want to say that, man, buthonestly, the reality is just
like it'd be more like figuringout how to live the life you
want there we go.

Speaker 2 (01:03:14):
That's the title.

Speaker 1 (01:03:14):
That really is, because at the center of
everything I do is like okay,how is this going to impact me
getting the way that I want tomy family plan, the plan we have
?
So I think it's just figuringout how to live the life you
want.
There we go.
I love that.
We can't see.
We came to it together.
Now, dan, you, you're going tobe shocked that as quickly as we
just came up with that title,it's sold out, no-transcript.

(01:03:54):
Going to star Dan Mori in thiscritically acclaimed, hit new
movie on Netflix?
Gosh, oh man, um, who wouldstar me?
You know, I I honestly thinkthat the mood that I'm in right
now, I feel like it wouldprobably be like a Jason Bateman
guy.
I feel like I don't know.

(01:04:17):
That's a really good question.
I don't see, I don't.
It's hard for me to actuallyconceptualize like who would
play me when I think about thesepeople that we put on pedestals
, right?
Do you know who?
I would have said my guess.
If I would have guessed you, Iwould have said Matt Damon.
You kind of got a little MattDamon, look.
So I, he was the first one thatcame to my mind and I was like
I'm like, is it?
Is it because I think that?
Or is it because I literallyhave recency bias because I just

(01:04:38):
rewatched Ford versus Ferrari,but I was thinking that it was
the first one that came to mind.
I'm like, no, I think that'sbecause I just watched that
movie, so maybe it's recencybias, but I do like him.
I really love goodwill huntingman I like man damon's stuff,
the, the boring stuff.
Yeah, he's.
Yeah, that's a pretty good onetoo, man.
All right, and the last andmost important question tell me

(01:04:59):
two words that would describesarah amazing and tolerant oh
good ones.
We've not heard tolerant before.
That is a fantastic word.
Staff.
The lighting round's over weboth kind of giggled.
This one was more serious thanthe lighting round.
Usually I get really, reallygoofy, but for some reason I
wasn't feeling as goofy as Inormally do.

(01:05:20):
Again, blank piece of paper, twopages of notes, everybody at
home.
You don't need a podcast tohave conversations like these.
Lights need as little time andcuriosity.
And if you've not talked to oneof your buddies who's a dad and
you're curious what they'restruggling with, go talk to them
.
Take them to coffee, grab abeer, grab lunch you know, grab
breakfast one morning.
It is.
It is rewarding.

(01:05:40):
What will happen.
I get free therapy out of everyepisode I do.
I've almost interviewed over300 people in six years.
It is an absolute honor andgift that I get to do this, and
thank you to Ty Nunez, mycollege teammate.
Uncle Rico moment right therewhy I'm still doing this, and if
he wouldn't have motivated meoff the couch during COVID 2020,
I would not be doing it.
So, ty, I love you, brother, sothankful for this.

(01:06:02):
But, dan, I'll make sureeverything's tagged in the show
notes.
It has been an honor getting toknow you, it's been an honor to
learn more about you and yourdad's skills, and I think you
dropped a lot of wisdom on usthat we can take as actionable
advice to become better leadersof our home.
So, without further ado,brother, thank you again so much
for spending some time with metoday.
Appreciate you having me, casey.