March 20, 2025 • 41 mins
What does it mean to be truly, unapologetically yourself? Our conversation begins with a Christmas card that raised eyebrows—featuring our guest flipping double middle fingers—and evolves into a profound exploration of authentic self-expression.
We dive deep into the creative process behind "From Love to War," a collection of short stories that blends autobiography with fiction. Unlike conventional writing approaches, these stories emerged from raw emotional terrain. "I spent a lot of time weeping over the freaking keyboard hammering out those stories," our guest reveals, offering a glimpse into the vulnerability required for meaningful creative work.
The heart of our discussion centers around relationships and how we connect with others. Love, according to our guest, serves as "the great equalizer"—a force that transcends circumstance and social standing. Whether you're in a luxury hotel or a humble dwelling, that moment of genuine connection exists outside time and space. This refreshing perspective cuts through commercial Valentine's Day narratives and speaks to something more fundamental about human connection.
Perhaps the most moving revelation comes when we discover parallel life philosophies. While our host lives by "leave a trail that everyone wants to follow," our guest writes, "I want to make a trail with words, a path no one has ever walked." This beautiful convergence highlights how we all seek to leave our unique mark on the world while creating something that resonates universally.
Join us for this honest, sometimes irreverent conversation about creativity, relationships, mortality, and the space between birth and death that one guest describes simply as "magic and mayhem." What trail are you leaving behind?
In this candid conversation, we explore authenticity in both creative expression and personal relationships, from unconventional Christmas cards to the emotional journey of writing deeply personal stories.
• Discussion of a controversial Christmas card featuring middle finger gestures that perfectly captured authentic self-expression
• Exploration of our guest's second book "From Love to War," a collection of short stories blending autobiography with fiction
• Deep dive into the emotional vulnerability required in creative writing, with our guest admitting to "weeping over the keyboard"
• Philosophical conversation about love as "the great equalizer" that transcends socioeconomic boundaries
• Discovery of parallel life philosophies: "leave a trail everyone wants to follow" and "make a trail with words"
• Thoughtful reflections on mortality, legacy, and how we want to be remembered
• Honest discussion about failure, resilience, and sharing life lessons with younger generations
The Rambling Gypsy podcast is a behind-the-scenes look at the lives of real Texans doing real sh*t. We're pulling back the curtains on our daily lives - and you're invited to laugh and learn along with us.
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https://www.theramblinggypsypodcast.com/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I put a blessing on it to real.
That's the metaphoric.
We just put the I in iconic,buzzing like I'm electronic.
Ah yeah, I put a blessing on it.
See me dripping in it 24-7 onit.
I'm just being honest.
Ah, holy water dripping,dripping from my neck to my crap
song to you stepping on it live.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Welcome back to the jungle.
Welcome back to the jungle,welcome back to the podcast.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Is it okay if I start ?
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I know you're the host, absolutely Is, is it?
Speaker 3 (00:25):
okay if I start, I know you're the host, is it okay
?
No, 110%.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
I have two things.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
I wanted to talk about in the beginning, and the
first one is this Last time wespoke about Not White Bread
Exactly and we said it was kindof testosterone-laden.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
No, we said it was testosterone-y.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
Testosterone-y, and so I haven't seen you since then
.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
And a few weeks went past and someone posted a review
on Amazon and the person's nameis Samantha, so I'm assuming
it's a woman and I don't knowhow many stars she gave me, but
I'm sure it was really low.
But I'd like to read you whatshe wrote.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
I would love for you to read me what she wrote, but I
have to tell you there'ssomething very ironic.
So my first name, obviously youguys know, is Tiffany, and my
grandmother told my mom, whenshe said she was pregnant, that
she was going to have agranddaughter named Tiffany
Renee, and my mom was adamant.
She was like, absolutely not.
My grandfather's name wasSamuel and my mom wanted a
(01:25):
grand— my name was supposed tobe Samantha.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
Okay, so let's read what.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
I did not.
Okay, I'd have no outsidealibis.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Well, this is.
This is what Samantha wrote.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
All right, let's hear it.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
If you like boys to men stories, this one is for you
.
Each chapter is laden withtestosterone and coming of age
stories through the decades.
It comes with fighting,father-son relationships,
friendships, war, love andgeneral life stories.
And I just want to say toSamantha if she's out there, she
(01:58):
hit a home run.
She might not have liked it, butshe definitely hit a home run
on reviewing that book.
And now the second thing, and Idon't want to put you on the
spot, but I got a Christmas cardfrom you for Christmas and I
mean kind of an odd way tocelebrate the birth of Jesus.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Well, you know what?
Speaker 3 (02:19):
And I don't mean to put you on the spot.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
No, I'm glad that you did, I'm glad that you are.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
I was a little shocked okay, because I thought
it was.
I thought you were mad at me,and then I, and then I, clearly
once again we're still new inour relationship.
I paused I paused and then Isaid no, that's everyone got
this.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yeah, yeah, so please go ahead um, ironically, I was
really um, so when we did thatphoto shoot it was just kind of
I've been doing the photo shootsor whatever for a very long
time, Um, and it's taken me along minute to just kind of get
(03:01):
back into my free spirit groove,um, and which has kind of been
happening in the last couple ofyears.
Um, but in that particular andit takes for someone to feel
comfortable in a photo shoot andyes, this is just my personal
opinion, but it's all about thephotographer and how comfortable
(03:23):
I mean there's some that canjust make you feel like, oh,
this is just never going to workand you feel like you're a
stiff robot and it's just notgoing to happen.
And I have two that I reallylike to work with that are we
have a blast, it is fun, nick'sthere, we laugh, we cut up, it's
just a good old time.
And this one is one particularone and I'll just run around and
(03:52):
I'm just doing whatever.
Well, that was that, actuallythat picture that was there, and
we were going through thephotos and, um, that one came
across and I had showed it tothe kids and one that has been
with me for a very long time notone of my own biological
children, but one that grew upwith my kids.
And he said that photo is 100%everything about you in one
(04:14):
picture.
Like that is all of you in onepicture.
And I said, you know, I kind ofthink it's Christmas card
worthy.
He said 110%.
And of course we always havethis long, ongoing joke about
making it to the Christmas cardlist.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
Should you tell your audience what was on the card,
and then maybe they wouldunderstand why I'm asking.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
So before I do that, we sent out over 500 Christmas
cards.
The majority of the ones that Isent them to were people that I
know, businesses that I know.
There were maybe a couple ofnew groups that are around, and
(05:00):
about that I thought, well,let's just kind of maybe test
the waters and just see.
And we discussed it a littlebit.
We were thinking, well, I mean,if they're not watching the
podcast or if they don't know me, then yeah, then they may be
offended by the card If theyknow everything about me and
(05:20):
they know that I say what I'mgoing to say.
I feel what I'm going to feel.
I am a very emotional person.
I joke a lot when it comes tothat kind of stuff and I was
waiting for someone to come backand say that is really not the
(05:41):
appropriate way to celebrateJesus.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
But if you notice, I did not say that.
I did not say that.
I did not say that.
I just said that was kind ofyou know it was.
You know I've gotten Christmascards over the year, but nothing
like that.
I mean that was out of the box,that was out of the off the
planet.
And I just kind of was likereally, she really doesn't like
me that much.
And I was like no, she reallydoesn't like me that much.
(06:06):
And I was like no, that'sprobably just how she is.
But I, you know, I mean I don'tthink I never thought
inappropriate.
I mean that was the furthestthing from my mind.
I just thought it was odd and Iwas just wondering where it
came from.
So, and it came from yourpersonality, not so much about
the Christmas holiday itself.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
No, it didn't.
It really no, it didn't.
It was.
It was literally stimulatedfrom the concept of how we
always say, well, you may makeit to the Christmas card list,
or how that person just reallypissed me off and you're not
you're not on the Christmas cardlist.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
I got it.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Do you want to know how many times I've actually?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
nailed out.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Christmas cards.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I don't know how many .
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Never.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
So this was the first year First, and I got one.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
You did.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
So I should frame it.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
I mean, that would make me happy I should frame it,
hang it in my office On myholiday card list it did not say
anywhere on there MerryChristmas.
Anywhere on there MerryChristmas, it said wishing you
guys happy holidays or somethingto that effect.
I'll have to go back and look.
(07:10):
I mean, that was a long minuteago.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
I think it said on there.
It said something about thebirth of Jesus and how lucky we
are yeah, lord, hear my prayer.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
No, absolutely, take it.
You're not a religious gal.
Well, I mean, religion is avery touchy subject and, yes, I
am to a certain extent.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
That's all right.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
But obviously you can see that my religion comes with
sass.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
How do you think you got here?
Speaker 2 (07:39):
Didn't we already talk about this?
No, we didn't.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
But we don't have to.
We don't have to, but go aheadso by name.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Are you going to tell everybody what was on the card?
So on the Christmas card list,um, and on the card that was
sent out, it is a picture of mesitting on a red velvet.
Uh, vintage, old, vintageantique sofa but it's in black
and white.
It is, and yes, and I am in a.
Did I have my velvet jacket on?
Or I mean my furry jacket on,or is I just have my white shirt
(08:08):
on?
I don't know.
Anyways, I am shooting the bird, both birds up in the air, and
yeah, so.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
I opened up the envelope and got slapped in the
face with that.
Next time, if I ever see youagain and I know I'm going to
gonna see you I'll bring it andhave you autograph it for me.
I would appreciate that well,look at.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
Okay.
Well, look at that.
It's not very often that I amspeechless, but that is all
right no, no that's very sweetand then I'll frame it.
Okay, but yeah, it was fun.
I got I cannot tell you howmany times during the day
(08:52):
because we sent them off insections.
You got one in an envelope.
That was a big number, Mm-hmm.
So there was envelopes and thenthere was just postcards.
Okay, so you got the envelope.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
Well, thank you for the envelope.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
I appreciate it and I appreciate the Christmas card
too.
It was unexpected, I was out oftown.
I was out of town, I got backafter Christmas and then you
know and got to it.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
So it was fine.
I tell you when, when they didstart hitting everybody's
addresses or when people did getto get a hold of them from our
friends in Nashville to ourfriends all over Texas, to some
people that I haven't seen andtalked to in a minute was just
like this is the best thing wehave ever freaking seen.
(09:43):
This is so you.
We are glad you're back andwelcome.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Thank you for thinking of me, my pleasure, my
pleasure.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
Flattering.
Thank you for accepting it andunderstanding that it had
nothing to do with.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
I just initially it's okay.
Just initially I was likereally.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
And that was the conversation.
I thought, man, this is eithergoing to go over very, very well
or this is going to completelybite me in the ass and people
are going to say that's okay.
I mean, I thought about it.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
It took a couple minutes and I was like no, no,
that's just the way she is, yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
So okay, but anyway thank you again and I appreciate
you thinking I'll bring it andyou can autograph it for me I
would be honored.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Thank you very much.
I would be honored, that's verysweet, okay, so where?
Are we going?
So we talked about you're anauthor of three books amongst a
bajillion different other things, but we talked about your first
book on the last episode, andtoday we want to talk about your
second book, and you'll see itright here on the last episode.
And today we want to talk aboutyour second book, and you'll
(10:47):
see it right here on the front.
I have the hard copy, yeah, butthis is From Love to War.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
So let's talk about the inspiration here.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
You know I'll be honest with you.
First of all.
I'm going to start with this.
When I wrote this book, I meanit was really emotional for me,
like really really emotional,and a lot of those stories in
there just, I think, were in mefor a long period of time and
took kind of a while to breakthem loose.
So, and I'm not the kind of guythat cries man but I tell you I
(11:28):
spent a lot of time weepingover the freaking keyboard
hammering out those stories.
But I mean, in retrospect, ifyou look at authors, if you look
at books, a lot of people writeabout love and war right, it's
not uncommon, and I just hadstories and the first part is
(11:48):
about relationships, the secondpart I just kind of a hodgepodge
.
I put a lot of differentstories in there that really
didn't fit in either category,but I thought it would be a nice
kind of break and um.
And then the last bit is, youknow, the war piece.
And, uh, the first book sinceis I use an alias, kevin dugan,
(12:13):
and in the front piece of thatbook I mentioned, if you see
kevin dugan, that's me and I Iuse my name, I use that name,
that alias, and a lot of thestories in that book because
they personally happened to meand the dedication is into the
front of some individual thatdied in the war.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yeah, and what else.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
And the front part, the love part, is not flowers
and chocolate.
I think it's more realistic onrelationships if you go through
them.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Right.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
And I don't know.
Woody, do you have questions?
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Love is really not really chocolates and flowers,
which it's kind of ironicbecause there's a particular
holiday that is rolling aroundthe corner.
Ah, that's right and we'll comeback.
I mean, which is a good time tokind of spin off to that.
(13:19):
Are you a love and chocolates?
I mean, are you a chocolate in?
Do you do that on the loveholiday of the February 14th?
Speaker 3 (13:30):
We always make it, we always make a big deal about
Valentine's day.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
You do.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Yeah, but uh, my um, my bride, says she'd rather get
scratchies than flowers.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
See, I love her.
She'd rather get scratchy.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
She'd rather get scratchies than flowers.
So yeah, so she gets scratchies, so what?
But normally we plan something,do you?
And actually I was supposed tobe in Spain for Valentine's.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Day.
Okay, now you're just anoverachiever.
That's ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
Yeah, but we had to cancel a trip.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Most people just try to get like go to dinner or
something.
We had the trip You're askingme in Spain.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
The trip got canceled because something came up.
So we're going to head down,we'll be down at the beach,
you'll be down on the island forthe holiday.
But we had something plannedbut it had to get canceled.
I mean, everything was booked,but she wasn't upset at all.
She's like it's no problem,we'll just do something
different later on.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
So I am not a Valentine's.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Day.
You don't believe inValentine's Day.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
I don't.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Not a romantic.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
No, that's absolutely not true.
I am very much a romantic.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
So why not recognize that holiday?
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Because, in my opinion, your relationship
should always be Valentine's Day.
I don't think that there needsto be one particular day that
you I understand that, but it'sjust, you know it's, I don't
know it's.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
I think it's a time to kind of go over the top.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
I think that's your anniversary.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
To each his own.
To each his own.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
Well, that too, you can do that too, but I think
it's a time to kind of and Idon't mean booking a reservation
at a restaurant that'sovercrowded and it's so busy.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Overcrowded overpriced.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Well, it doesn't matter, they're just shoveling
food out and it's the masses.
I mean.
You don't get that individualservice, there's not as much
time spent on the food becausethey're just trying to deal with
the volume, and so I don'tthink that's the right way to go
.
I think it should be moreintimate and romantic and you
can do that anyway.
There's a quote in the front ofthat book.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
I'm going to talk to you about that in just a minute.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
That first quote.
But, that first quote Because,since you've talked about
Valentine's Day, to me that sumsup everything in relationships
and love.
Did you tab that, the firstquote?
Speaker 2 (15:48):
No, the second one.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
That's right before love.
You can talk about that but weare going to.
I can just tell you right nowTell me, it doesn't matter if
you're rich or poor or live in amansion or a tent, love is the
same.
It's a great equalizer.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
That's before the love and war portion.
Yeah, it's a great equalizer.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
So it doesn't matter, I don't care if you're a
billionaire wherever or you'reliving in a mud hut, I don't
know in wherever, in Texas, Imean at that moment, at lost and
found Hang on, I don't know Inwherever, in Texas.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
You know I mean at that moment, At lost and found.
Hang on, it doesn't matter Ifyou're in love, if you're in
love, that's a new Braunfels.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Hang on, hang on, hang on.
That's an inside new Braunfelsjournal.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
It's to have a mud hut across from your house.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
Well, I know, yeah, but if you're in love.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Now, Piggy lives in it.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
If you're in love and also, too, at the moment of you
know if you're intimate withsomeone.
No-transcript.
I think that when you're makinglove can we talk about.
Sex always sells anyway, but ifyou're making love and if
you're into that moment, if twopeople into that moment, I don't
(17:02):
know, I'll speak for myself.
I don't know where I'm at.
I could be in a $50,000 bed ina million dollar a night hotel,
or I could be in a mud hut inNew Braunfels.
At that moment I have no ideawhere I could be in a mud hut in
New Braunfels.
At that moment, I have no ideawhere I'm at in space and time,
and I think that goes with lovetoo.
(17:24):
I think if you're, I mean it isthe great equalizer.
I think, and I think that's whyeverybody searches for it and
wants it, and it's so important,more important than anything.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
In your opinion.
How do you know when you foundit?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Wow, how do I know?
How do I know when I found love.
That's a tough definition.
I knew how I found it.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
From love to war.
Speaker 3 (17:49):
I felt I was in love.
I mean, you ever hear thatadage head over heels?
I actually felt like my heelswere going over my head, yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
So you really didn't know where you were.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
No, I mean I was in love.
I was in love tremendously withmy wife now my wife and with a
woman and I just knew it wasright.
So I mean I was just felt likethat.
I bought.
Can I talk about this?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
It's real personal A hundred and ten percent.
Speaker 3 (18:19):
I don't think I've told anybody this.
I bought, you know, myengagement ring, wedding ring.
You know, engagement ring, andI remember like I had it hidden
in a closet and I was doing myclinicals out in San Diego and I
would go in that closet and I'dpull that ring out and I'd look
at it and put it back, you know, and I had it in my pocket you
know, I felt like I was burninga hole in it.
Can I tell you about when Iproposed, Please?
(18:40):
This is really personal, butyou know, I, I tried, I, I, I, I
flew back from San Diego.
My wife was here in San Antonio.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
San.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
Antonio and I flew in to see her and I had, and this
thing was burning a hole in mypocket.
And I got to her apartment andI got on one knee and proposed
to her and she laughed at me,she laughed at me.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
How long did you have the ring before you proposed?
She laughed at me.
She laughed at me.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
She took it, but she laughed at me and I said, fine,
go in the kitchen and make me asandwich, because I just got off
the plane, and with lettuce andtomato and a little salt and
pepper, anyway, so she laughedat me.
She laughed at me, and thenlater on I don't know if I
should and then later on shesent me an email and she was
more serious.
So I printed that email out andframed it, because it sounds
(19:29):
like I proposed over theinternet, which of course wasn't
true at all.
But yeah, so, yes, so that'sthe story, right there.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
And you guys have been together 25 years.
So beautiful.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
So if anybody could, Married for the right reason and
again to get back to it.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
What is that reason?
Speaker 3 (19:48):
What Love is the great equalizer.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
It is.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
It is.
It's a great equalizer.
It makes everything equal andit's worth going after.
And the stories in that book,again, are not flowers and
chocolate and they're notanything.
What.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
I just said but neither is a relationship.
Speaker 3 (20:07):
No, sometimes it is, though.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
What makes it sometimes more than not.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
Chemistry, yes, and people get along Trust,
understanding.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
It's huge.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
Trust understanding.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Have you guys always been able to talk?
Speaker 3 (20:25):
I don't want to.
You know this is.
You sound like Dr Phil.
I don't want to talk about myrelationship.
Look, I don't want to talkabout my relationship at all.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
I love Mr Phil.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
You're going to get me.
You're going to paint me in acorner and get me in a lot of
trouble.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
man, I'm absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
I need help.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
Jumbo I need help in my relationship.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
I'll talk to you offline, but not in front of the
masses.
I would do anything for you,but I would not.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
No, not in front of the masses.
Do you get married for theright reason?
Speaker 3 (20:58):
See how I answered your question.
With a it Did you get marriedfor the right reason.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
See, I answered your question with a question Did you
get married for the rightreason?
I thought.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I did Okay.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I'm not a quitter and that's the issue that I have.
Can I say something Please?
Speaker 3 (21:10):
Not to interrupt, but I can say something, please.
You don't seem like the personthat likes to fail at things.
No, you don't seem like theperson that likes to fail at
things.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
No, and having a failed marriage probably doesn't
sit well with you at all.
It really doesn't um at all didthat sting.
I didn't want it to stink no Iwas just trying to be honest no,
and I'm glad you are, becauseyou don't seem like that person
that likes to fail I do not liketo fail, and I and I've said
this before with differentindividuals that I've talked to
on the show is that I um, I canpromise you when I I go up the
(21:44):
ladder and when I fall off theladder, I'll get back up, dust
myself off and I'll go back upit, but I will never fall down
that ladder for the same reasondo you think marriage is the
worst thing you could fail at?
Speaker 3 (21:57):
Oh no, what's the worst thing you could fail?
Speaker 2 (21:58):
at what's the worst thing you could fail at.
You can fail at anything andeverything.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
Business.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
What.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
What Investments?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
You can fail at anything.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
Yeah, but what's the worst thing you could fail at?
Love?
What's the worst thing youcould fail at the subject is
love worst thing, you'd fail atthe subject is love?
Is love the worst thing?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
you could fail at.
Not in my opinion okay, noproblem.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
What is the worst thing you could fail at?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
let me try to narrow that down in a short statement.
You're the host it's your.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
You don't have to answer that question.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
No, plus, it's a free country.
Speaker 3 (22:35):
You don't have to answer that.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
I have said several times that, if I was to die
tomorrow, that I feel like Ihave shared my lessons, my
fuck-ups, my failures, my stupidchoices with kids younger than
(23:03):
me.
Anybody that, anybody, andeverybody that I can say, if you
ever learn anything from me, ifyou ever listen to anything
that I say, please just listento this one thing.
And because I wish somebodywould have taken me when I was
in your position and said youknow what, tiffany, listen to me
.
I've been there, I've done that.
This is something that willdon't follow in my own footsteps
(23:28):
and I feel like, um, I would beokay with that, like I would be
okay passing away tomorrow.
So, to answer your question,what is the worst thing that you
could fail at?
In my opinion, it is to notteach and not share your
(23:51):
experiences.
I thought you were going to saywar?
Speaker 3 (23:53):
I'm completely joking .
Just don't fucking miss whenyou're aiming bro.
I thought you were going to saywar.
I'm completely joking, but I'mjust a little levity.
Just don't fucking miss whenyou're aiming bro.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Hey hey, hey, just let him win, god damn.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Sometimes hey, come on, it was just a little levity.
If that target's moving, hey,hey, it was just a little levity
it was a little levity, it wasa little levity.
Look, now, that's all I thinkwe need it.
No, seriously, Just in a littlebit I do.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
When you said that I told God when I was 30 years old
.
I said well, I've lived likefive lifetimes and I go.
If you want to take me now,it's okay.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
And I had that conversation with God at 30.
I'm not ready and he let mestick around that much longer.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
I have so much more to do, but at 30, I was ready to
box.
I was like damn, this has beenlike awesome and thank you so
much.
And if you want to take me now,it's okay, I understand,
because frigging you're reallybeen like just like shoveling it
at me, but okay.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
No, I have a lot of things I still want to do.
I have a lot of experiences.
I have my first grandbaby andshe is the light of my life and
I have so much.
I have so much to still liveand learn and do Everybody does.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
And speaking of this book here, I addressed suicide
in it and there's three storiesin there and one is a-.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
So I want to touch base real quick before you get
to that So-.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
Because there is a lot of life out there.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Well, yes, there is yes.
So in the first book that youhave that was the white bread,
not white bread, right, and sothat one is considered a what.
I don't know why I asked youthe question.
Is that considered it's?
Speaker 3 (25:33):
a memoir.
It's a memoir, okay, storiesabout my life.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
Right, and so in this one explain the difference
between that, for people thatdon't know, and this new book.
This is the second book, thisis it's a booyah base I'm some
of.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
It is about.
This is a short storycollection, some of it is about
me, some is directly about me,without a doubt, and then some
of it is kind of a mix and um.
At the end of that book and myum editor said that's good, you
did that because at the end Ikind of talk about some of the
stories and where they came from, okay and um, some of them is
this is why this came out, andthen some are totally fiction so
(26:08):
from love to war is severalshort stories.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
That's why it's called a short story collection
well, more than seven, but gotit I think there's like.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
It's gotta be 20 at least in there.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
In here.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Yeah, it gotta be at least Nice.
I can count if you want rightnow, no, that'd be boring Anyway
.
So yeah, so you have somethingtagged there, and I'll be honest
with you.
Since I walked in, I saw thoselittle slips of paper sticking
out and it is eating at me thatwhat you decided to think that
was like this discussion worthy.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Well.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
And it's the love part, and of course it is.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
You know, valentine's Day is coming up, so what do
you have, which we both havedifferent opinions on that?
No, it's okay, it's justtotally fine.
No, it's okay, no.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
You know, everybody has their own opinion.
I just got an email recentlyabout one of the stories in the
book and someone described to mehow it related to their life
and I was very flattered aboutthat, that I actually touched
somebody through one of mystories.
And they sent a note and saidhey, you know, I read your book.
And then this happened to meand I thought about that one
(27:15):
story and go yeah, so whenpeople like samantha and it was
in the love portion or in thepeople that responding.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
How do they respond to you?
I mean, is that, how is it?
She obviously responded on theamazon, yeah it was a review.
Speaker 3 (27:30):
Right, got me a poor review, but I mean, god bless
her.
She hit a home run, she knewexactly what she was talking
about yeah because that's whatit was.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
So how the person that you were just talking about
on this part, they emailed you,or?
Speaker 3 (27:44):
My email's in the front of the book, if you have
any issues or whatever youactually.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
a lot of people don't think that you actually read
the reviews or that any authoractually reads the reviews, and
you know, good, bad, indifferent, everybody's entitled to their
opinion.
Speaker 3 (27:59):
And you know, yes, of course I read everything
without a doubt.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
I like that.
Yeah, I think that's importantthat they know that.
Well, okay, that you do payattention, I do.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
I do and I hear their voice, samantha.
Speaker 2 (28:09):
There you go.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
You hated my first book but you understood it right
.
You know, and I you know, inthat first book I try to.
I try to direct that moretowards men because men are a
minority as far as readers goand, um, I thought that book
might touch more men than womenyou know, maybe get them to read
a little bit.
They, you know, they, they won'tfeel such like you know.
You know, and the and the andthe cover is very aggressive,
let's face it.
It's red, you know, and there'sthings on it, but so and she
(28:41):
should have understood that whenshe saw the cover.
That was like ooh you know, butyeah so, and this was, I think,
different, I think this wassofter.
I think there's something inthere for everybody personally
Right right, but okay.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
So you have in here.
It says I want to make a trailwith words, a path no one has
ever walked.
Speaker 3 (29:06):
And your question.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
Explain that.
And then I'll tell you why thishits home with me.
Speaker 3 (29:22):
My writing is my writing and I don't try to mimic
anyone and I don't know it'spersonal.
There are and I don't mean tolambaste, like you know, other
writers.
Some people follow a certainscript to sell books.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Right.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
And I'm not that way.
That's it, so you know.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
So I.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Like me or hate me, you know.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Hence my card that you received in the mail.
Yeah, so yeah, I started mylittle gypsy thing a very, very
long time ago.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
You look kind of gypsy tonight, by the way.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
Thank, you Did, you do that on purpose.
No, we had a really long dayand we had to rush and ran home
and just kind of, but no.
Speaker 3 (30:17):
You look kind of gypsy tonight, thank you.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Thank you very much.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
I'm glad you thought that was flattering and not.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
It was meant to be yeah, it's, it's, it's the gypsy
way.
I mean, it is that's, that's mydeal.
But that's kind of how it allstarted.
I had a would go on theweekends and would put up my
tent and go and sell and bouncefrom place to place to place and
rodeo to rodeo, rodeo, andevery one of my little
businesses and whatever hadgypsy in it and gypsy this and
(30:47):
gypsy that, and I ran around ina murder home all over the
country and did that for a verylong time.
But anyways, I would always getasked and still do um, who are
you?
And it's which is just shocksthe shit out of me, because I'm
just some little girl from newBraunfels, texas, and um, it
(31:09):
would be, uh, just shocking tome that somebody would want to
ask me like, who am I, or why amI doing this or whatever.
So I had a slogan, that orwhatever you want to call this,
(31:32):
a statement, so to speak.
Quote A quote.
And mine is leave a trail thatevery girl wants to follow.
Run away with me, okay, andit's very similar and you
connect it to that quote Righton.
(31:53):
Which is really kind of wildbecause they're very.
Yours says I want to make atrail with words.
Mine says leave a trail thatevery girl wants to follow.
Speaker 3 (32:05):
I don't make I'm not gender specific that everyone
wants to follow.
I'm not gender specific.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
Well, on my bus mine said you can't, nowadays you
can't be gender, nothing forfuck's sake.
Speaker 3 (32:14):
No, that's, that's over.
Yeah, thank God, I understandthat Right, that ship sailed.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Yeah, so that's mine is leave a trail that everyone
must follow, Run away with me.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Well, that's the whole idea with writing.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
And again I got a note recently I don't write, I
can hardly even fucking spell,whatever Anyway, and that's the
same thing.
Speaker 3 (32:35):
I got a note recently about one of the stories in
that book where someoneconnected to it and wrote
something back to me.
And you connected to a pieceright in the in the front, the
first page, and and I'm glad youknow and you know and, yeah,
and I know you somewhat and wehave that connection now but I'm
, I'm hoping there's, you know,somebody in wherever you know
(32:57):
and in uh, norwesville, you know, whatever state and uh maybe
opens the book and reads a shortstory or reads a piece of my
work and somehow connects to it,just like an artist.
I mean, if you paint a pictureand connect and someone connects
to that, uh and um and feelsomething.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
So I mean, thank you so much for telling me that too
well, I think what's kind ofironic in um our conversation,
when you asked me what would bethe one thing that you could
fail at, I feel like you want tomake a trail with words.
I want to leave a trail thateveryone can follow, and if I
(33:37):
didn't leave my trail then Iwould have failed.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
Okay, the only thing I want, you want to hear, the
only thing I want, I think, whenI die and this is how much I
respect your sex if there's onewoman that sheds one tear when I
box, then my life was worth it.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
Well, I've shedded it during our show.
So, yeah, you uh don't goanywhere.
That's it, it's not time.
That's it, it's not time.
Speaker 3 (34:13):
That's it, that's all I'm, that's all I, and I think
my life would be worth it.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
One woman, one tear I like that one woman Heartfelt
emotions Digging from way downdeep, that's beautiful.
So here's my second one.
You ready.
Speaker 3 (34:32):
Like I said, that tore my guts out of me to write
in that book, but go ahead.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
I love that, that you're so open and you were able
to put all of this out therefor everyone and to share.
And how long did it take to putall this, all these stories,
into this book?
Speaker 3 (34:55):
I didn't time it.
I wasn't on a clock, I was inthe groove.
First book came out and I justwas like let's kick the second
one out.
Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 2 (35:10):
So this quote says we will all die.
Yeah, that is how it ends, yep.
We are all born and that is howit begins, yep.
The rest is magic and mayhem.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
It's definitely in your life 110%.
Got it down in everybody's life, hopefully.
So some people live a littlemore passive than others, but
yeah, hopefully this takes meback to a conversation that you
and I had, which hopefully it'smore magic than mayhem.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
You can always hope in one hand and shit the other,
but yeah, I'm always shootingfor the hope you know what you
never?
Speaker 3 (35:51):
you never know what?
Hey, you never know what toexpect when you're in your?
Speaker 2 (35:55):
no, when you're in the, he she shed yeah, oh my god
, I never thought that's it.
We're burning her to the ground.
Fuck, we did.
We're probably going to justkeep doing it, yeah.
So we do that, okay, so thisCut to the chase we will all die
(36:19):
, and that is how it ends.
Speaker 3 (36:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
We are all born.
Speaker 3 (36:21):
Yeah, and that is how it begins.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
Yeah, true, right.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
It is True that which ?
Speaker 1 (36:25):
takes me back to a conversation that you and I had
about you saying.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
What.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
When I am buried.
I want to be buried naked.
Speaker 3 (36:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
He does, he wants to be buried.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
Oh, you picked that out of the book, didn't you?
Speaker 2 (36:43):
No, you picked that out of the book, didn't you?
When I was reading this.
Oh, go ahead.
No, first I read all into thispart.
Speaker 3 (36:49):
Can I talk?
There's a piece in there aboutmy death.
You just didn't find it.
But go ahead and then I'll readit to you.
I'll take the book out of yourhands and I will read it.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
So, okay, perfect.
Yeah, go ahead.
Did I ruin the moment?
No, no, you didn't.
I mean no, I'm not going to letyou.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
No, You're the boss, applesauce, so the rest is magic
and mayhem.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
So we got here, we end.
So the rest is magic and mayhem, it's your dash.
Speaker 3 (37:23):
Whatever you make of it, whatever you make of it,
hopefully it is and you know,and it's that subjective too.
But yeah, I mean life is great.
I mean this planet is great, Imean everything is.
I mean, if you take a momentand think about creation, you
know, and why we're here and howwe got here.
If you take that moment andthink about the world, you know.
(37:46):
I mean all the different fishesand animals and plants and in
different, different, you know,continents and, excuse me,
latitudes, longitudes, and youput that all together and it's
just a beautiful place isn't it,it's a beautiful place and it's
what you make of it.
(38:06):
You know what you do with it andthe people you know.
You, like I said, you're really.
You cherish your relationshipswith people and how you treat
them and such and and you knowit's just.
I mean this is.
I mean I hope everybody takes amoment in their life, whenever
(38:30):
that is, I don't care if they'refive or 50 or 100 years old and
take a moment and just kind ofthink about how they got here.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (38:38):
Right.
Speaker 3 (38:38):
About life, about creation, about the world.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
We're 300 years old, right 500.
What did you say?
Years old, right 500.
Speaker 1 (38:45):
What did you say?
Your target age was my target.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
No, I said well, we should live to be yes, so we
could see the fruits of ourlabor and what we've done or
haven't done, you know.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (38:56):
And reflect on it, maybe fix it or not fix it.
Some people can't be fixed.
No, Anyway can I read yousomething out of this book,
since you?
Speaker 2 (39:04):
brought it out 110% and.
Speaker 3 (39:05):
I could find it fairly quickly.
I can't, and I want to tell youafternoon, la Floridita, look,
you're just there.
What am I looking up?
Now I know what I'm looking up.
I'm looking up something with acoffin in it.
There it is right.
There you talk about my deathbefore.
(39:31):
As Kevin Dugan grew older, heoccasionally thought about his
own death and burial.
He wondered about the placewhere he would become part of
the earth.
Kevin considered being buriedin a cardboard box with no
embalming.
He would decompose quickly andin some way become helpful again
, like an expensive fertilizerfood for the subterranean world,
(39:52):
utilitarian, not just taking upunderground space in an
impenetrable body vault.
A road could be paved over hisremains.
Trucks and cars driving bywould make sounds and vibrations
with their steel-belted tireson the asphalt.
The thought excited him morethan grass and squirrels.
(40:14):
Anyway, there's my death.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
So the thought had excited him more than grass and
squirrels.
Yeah, put me in the ground.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
cardboard box no one ball me.
Pave a road over me.
So the thought had excited himmore than grass and squirrels.
Yeah, put me in the ground.
Cardboard box, no embalming.
Pave a road over me.
I'm good, you'd like that too.
Cars going over vroom, vroom,big tractor, trailer, vibrations
, noise.
Wake you up a little bit, yeah,yeah.
(40:44):
Fiddling grass and squirrels.
Wake you up a little bit.
Yeah yeah, fiddling grass andsquirrels.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
I can relate to that.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (40:54):
That's Anyway.
So there you go.
And yeah, and I think I toldyou last time I want to be
buried naked, but I came intothe world nude.
Yeah, I want to be you know,god can have me back that way,
you know.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 3 (41:05):
He doesn't, I don't need to be dressed.
Speaker 2 (41:09):
No, I kind of agree.
I put a blessing on it to real.
That's the metaphoric.
We just put the I in iconic,buzzing like I'm electronic.
Ah yeah, I put a blessing on it.
See me dripping in it 24-7 onit.
I'm just being honest.
Ah, holy water dripping,dripping from my neck to my crap
song to you stepping on it live.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Welcome back to the jungle.
Welcome back to the jungle,welcome back to the podcast.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Is it okay if I start ?
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I know you're the host, absolutely Is, is it?
Speaker 3 (00:25):
okay if I start, I know you're the host, is it okay
?
No, 110%.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
I have two things.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
I wanted to talk about in the beginning, and the
first one is this Last time wespoke about Not White Bread
Exactly and we said it was kindof testosterone-laden.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
No, we said it was testosterone-y.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
Testosterone-y, and so I haven't seen you since then
.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
And a few weeks went past and someone posted a review
on Amazon and the person's nameis Samantha, so I'm assuming
it's a woman and I don't knowhow many stars she gave me, but
I'm sure it was really low.
But I'd like to read you whatshe wrote.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
I would love for you to read me what she wrote, but I
have to tell you there'ssomething very ironic.
So my first name, obviously youguys know, is Tiffany, and my
grandmother told my mom, whenshe said she was pregnant, that
she was going to have agranddaughter named Tiffany
Renee, and my mom was adamant.
She was like, absolutely not.
My grandfather's name wasSamuel and my mom wanted a
(01:25):
grand— my name was supposed tobe Samantha.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
Okay, so let's read what.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
I did not.
Okay, I'd have no outsidealibis.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Well, this is.
This is what Samantha wrote.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
All right, let's hear it.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
If you like boys to men stories, this one is for you
.
Each chapter is laden withtestosterone and coming of age
stories through the decades.
It comes with fighting,father-son relationships,
friendships, war, love andgeneral life stories.
And I just want to say toSamantha if she's out there, she
(01:58):
hit a home run.
She might not have liked it, butshe definitely hit a home run
on reviewing that book.
And now the second thing, and Idon't want to put you on the
spot, but I got a Christmas cardfrom you for Christmas and I
mean kind of an odd way tocelebrate the birth of Jesus.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Well, you know what?
Speaker 3 (02:19):
And I don't mean to put you on the spot.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
No, I'm glad that you did, I'm glad that you are.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
I was a little shocked okay, because I thought
it was.
I thought you were mad at me,and then I, and then I, clearly
once again we're still new inour relationship.
I paused I paused and then Isaid no, that's everyone got
this.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yeah, yeah, so please go ahead um, ironically, I was
really um, so when we did thatphoto shoot it was just kind of
I've been doing the photo shootsor whatever for a very long
time, Um, and it's taken me along minute to just kind of get
(03:01):
back into my free spirit groove,um, and which has kind of been
happening in the last couple ofyears.
Um, but in that particular andit takes for someone to feel
comfortable in a photo shoot andyes, this is just my personal
opinion, but it's all about thephotographer and how comfortable
(03:23):
I mean there's some that canjust make you feel like, oh,
this is just never going to workand you feel like you're a
stiff robot and it's just notgoing to happen.
And I have two that I reallylike to work with that are we
have a blast, it is fun, nick'sthere, we laugh, we cut up, it's
just a good old time.
And this one is one particularone and I'll just run around and
(03:52):
I'm just doing whatever.
Well, that was that, actuallythat picture that was there, and
we were going through thephotos and, um, that one came
across and I had showed it tothe kids and one that has been
with me for a very long time notone of my own biological
children, but one that grew upwith my kids.
And he said that photo is 100%everything about you in one
(04:14):
picture.
Like that is all of you in onepicture.
And I said, you know, I kind ofthink it's Christmas card
worthy.
He said 110%.
And of course we always havethis long, ongoing joke about
making it to the Christmas cardlist.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
Should you tell your audience what was on the card,
and then maybe they wouldunderstand why I'm asking.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
So before I do that, we sent out over 500 Christmas
cards.
The majority of the ones that Isent them to were people that I
know, businesses that I know.
There were maybe a couple ofnew groups that are around, and
(05:00):
about that I thought, well,let's just kind of maybe test
the waters and just see.
And we discussed it a littlebit.
We were thinking, well, I mean,if they're not watching the
podcast or if they don't know me, then yeah, then they may be
offended by the card If theyknow everything about me and
(05:20):
they know that I say what I'mgoing to say.
I feel what I'm going to feel.
I am a very emotional person.
I joke a lot when it comes tothat kind of stuff and I was
waiting for someone to come backand say that is really not the
(05:41):
appropriate way to celebrateJesus.
Speaker 3 (05:43):
But if you notice, I did not say that.
I did not say that.
I did not say that.
I just said that was kind ofyou know it was.
You know I've gotten Christmascards over the year, but nothing
like that.
I mean that was out of the box,that was out of the off the
planet.
And I just kind of was likereally, she really doesn't like
me that much.
And I was like no, she reallydoesn't like me that much.
(06:06):
And I was like no, that'sprobably just how she is.
But I, you know, I mean I don'tthink I never thought
inappropriate.
I mean that was the furthestthing from my mind.
I just thought it was odd and Iwas just wondering where it
came from.
So, and it came from yourpersonality, not so much about
the Christmas holiday itself.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
No, it didn't.
It really no, it didn't.
It was.
It was literally stimulatedfrom the concept of how we
always say, well, you may makeit to the Christmas card list,
or how that person just reallypissed me off and you're not
you're not on the Christmas cardlist.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
I got it.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Do you want to know how many times I've actually?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
nailed out.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Christmas cards.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I don't know how many .
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Never.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
So this was the first year First, and I got one.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
You did.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
So I should frame it.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
I mean, that would make me happy I should frame it,
hang it in my office On myholiday card list it did not say
anywhere on there MerryChristmas.
Anywhere on there MerryChristmas, it said wishing you
guys happy holidays or somethingto that effect.
I'll have to go back and look.
(07:10):
I mean, that was a long minuteago.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
I think it said on there.
It said something about thebirth of Jesus and how lucky we
are yeah, lord, hear my prayer.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
No, absolutely, take it.
You're not a religious gal.
Well, I mean, religion is avery touchy subject and, yes, I
am to a certain extent.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
That's all right.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
But obviously you can see that my religion comes with
sass.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
How do you think you got here?
Speaker 2 (07:39):
Didn't we already talk about this?
No, we didn't.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
But we don't have to.
We don't have to, but go aheadso by name.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Are you going to tell everybody what was on the card?
So on the Christmas card list,um, and on the card that was
sent out, it is a picture of mesitting on a red velvet.
Uh, vintage, old, vintageantique sofa but it's in black
and white.
It is, and yes, and I am in a.
Did I have my velvet jacket on?
Or I mean my furry jacket on,or is I just have my white shirt
(08:08):
on?
I don't know.
Anyways, I am shooting the bird, both birds up in the air, and
yeah, so.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
I opened up the envelope and got slapped in the
face with that.
Next time, if I ever see youagain and I know I'm going to
gonna see you I'll bring it andhave you autograph it for me.
I would appreciate that well,look at.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
Okay.
Well, look at that.
It's not very often that I amspeechless, but that is all
right no, no that's very sweetand then I'll frame it.
Okay, but yeah, it was fun.
I got I cannot tell you howmany times during the day
(08:52):
because we sent them off insections.
You got one in an envelope.
That was a big number, Mm-hmm.
So there was envelopes and thenthere was just postcards.
Okay, so you got the envelope.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
Well, thank you for the envelope.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
I appreciate it and I appreciate the Christmas card
too.
It was unexpected, I was out oftown.
I was out of town, I got backafter Christmas and then you
know and got to it.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
So it was fine.
I tell you when, when they didstart hitting everybody's
addresses or when people did getto get a hold of them from our
friends in Nashville to ourfriends all over Texas, to some
people that I haven't seen andtalked to in a minute was just
like this is the best thing wehave ever freaking seen.
(09:43):
This is so you.
We are glad you're back andwelcome.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Thank you for thinking of me, my pleasure, my
pleasure.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
Flattering.
Thank you for accepting it andunderstanding that it had
nothing to do with.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
I just initially it's okay.
Just initially I was likereally.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
And that was the conversation.
I thought, man, this is eithergoing to go over very, very well
or this is going to completelybite me in the ass and people
are going to say that's okay.
I mean, I thought about it.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
It took a couple minutes and I was like no, no,
that's just the way she is, yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
So okay, but anyway thank you again and I appreciate
you thinking I'll bring it andyou can autograph it for me I
would be honored.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Thank you very much.
I would be honored, that's verysweet, okay, so where?
Are we going?
So we talked about you're anauthor of three books amongst a
bajillion different other things, but we talked about your first
book on the last episode, andtoday we want to talk about your
second book, and you'll see itright here on the last episode.
And today we want to talk aboutyour second book, and you'll
(10:47):
see it right here on the front.
I have the hard copy, yeah, butthis is From Love to War.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
So let's talk about the inspiration here.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
You know I'll be honest with you.
First of all.
I'm going to start with this.
When I wrote this book, I meanit was really emotional for me,
like really really emotional,and a lot of those stories in
there just, I think, were in mefor a long period of time and
took kind of a while to breakthem loose.
So, and I'm not the kind of guythat cries man but I tell you I
(11:28):
spent a lot of time weepingover the freaking keyboard
hammering out those stories.
But I mean, in retrospect, ifyou look at authors, if you look
at books, a lot of people writeabout love and war right, it's
not uncommon, and I just hadstories and the first part is
(11:48):
about relationships, the secondpart I just kind of a hodgepodge
.
I put a lot of differentstories in there that really
didn't fit in either category,but I thought it would be a nice
kind of break and um.
And then the last bit is, youknow, the war piece.
And, uh, the first book sinceis I use an alias, kevin dugan,
(12:13):
and in the front piece of thatbook I mentioned, if you see
kevin dugan, that's me and I Iuse my name, I use that name,
that alias, and a lot of thestories in that book because
they personally happened to meand the dedication is into the
front of some individual thatdied in the war.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yeah, and what else.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
And the front part, the love part, is not flowers
and chocolate.
I think it's more realistic onrelationships if you go through
them.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Right.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
And I don't know.
Woody, do you have questions?
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Love is really not really chocolates and flowers,
which it's kind of ironicbecause there's a particular
holiday that is rolling aroundthe corner.
Ah, that's right and we'll comeback.
I mean, which is a good time tokind of spin off to that.
(13:19):
Are you a love and chocolates?
I mean, are you a chocolate in?
Do you do that on the loveholiday of the February 14th?
Speaker 3 (13:30):
We always make it, we always make a big deal about
Valentine's day.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
You do.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Yeah, but uh, my um, my bride, says she'd rather get
scratchies than flowers.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
See, I love her.
She'd rather get scratchy.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
She'd rather get scratchies than flowers.
So yeah, so she gets scratchies, so what?
But normally we plan something,do you?
And actually I was supposed tobe in Spain for Valentine's.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Day.
Okay, now you're just anoverachiever.
That's ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
Yeah, but we had to cancel a trip.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Most people just try to get like go to dinner or
something.
We had the trip You're askingme in Spain.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
The trip got canceled because something came up.
So we're going to head down,we'll be down at the beach,
you'll be down on the island forthe holiday.
But we had something plannedbut it had to get canceled.
I mean, everything was booked,but she wasn't upset at all.
She's like it's no problem,we'll just do something
different later on.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
So I am not a Valentine's.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Day.
You don't believe inValentine's Day.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
I don't.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Not a romantic.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
No, that's absolutely not true.
I am very much a romantic.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
So why not recognize that holiday?
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Because, in my opinion, your relationship
should always be Valentine's Day.
I don't think that there needsto be one particular day that
you I understand that, but it'sjust, you know it's, I don't
know it's.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
I think it's a time to kind of go over the top.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
I think that's your anniversary.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
To each his own.
To each his own.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
Well, that too, you can do that too, but I think
it's a time to kind of and Idon't mean booking a reservation
at a restaurant that'sovercrowded and it's so busy.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Overcrowded overpriced.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Well, it doesn't matter, they're just shoveling
food out and it's the masses.
I mean.
You don't get that individualservice, there's not as much
time spent on the food becausethey're just trying to deal with
the volume, and so I don'tthink that's the right way to go
.
I think it should be moreintimate and romantic and you
can do that anyway.
There's a quote in the front ofthat book.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
I'm going to talk to you about that in just a minute.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
That first quote.
But, that first quote Because,since you've talked about
Valentine's Day, to me that sumsup everything in relationships
and love.
Did you tab that, the firstquote?
Speaker 2 (15:48):
No, the second one.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
That's right before love.
You can talk about that but weare going to.
I can just tell you right nowTell me, it doesn't matter if
you're rich or poor or live in amansion or a tent, love is the
same.
It's a great equalizer.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
That's before the love and war portion.
Yeah, it's a great equalizer.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
So it doesn't matter, I don't care if you're a
billionaire wherever or you'reliving in a mud hut, I don't
know in wherever, in Texas, Imean at that moment, at lost and
found Hang on, I don't know Inwherever, in Texas.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
You know I mean at that moment, At lost and found.
Hang on, it doesn't matter Ifyou're in love, if you're in
love, that's a new Braunfels.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Hang on, hang on, hang on.
That's an inside new Braunfelsjournal.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
It's to have a mud hut across from your house.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
Well, I know, yeah, but if you're in love.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Now, Piggy lives in it.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
If you're in love and also, too, at the moment of you
know if you're intimate withsomeone.
No-transcript.
I think that when you're makinglove can we talk about.
Sex always sells anyway, but ifyou're making love and if
you're into that moment, if twopeople into that moment, I don't
(17:02):
know, I'll speak for myself.
I don't know where I'm at.
I could be in a $50,000 bed ina million dollar a night hotel,
or I could be in a mud hut inNew Braunfels.
At that moment I have no ideawhere I could be in a mud hut in
New Braunfels.
At that moment, I have no ideawhere I'm at in space and time,
and I think that goes with lovetoo.
(17:24):
I think if you're, I mean it isthe great equalizer.
I think, and I think that's whyeverybody searches for it and
wants it, and it's so important,more important than anything.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
In your opinion.
How do you know when you foundit?
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Wow, how do I know?
How do I know when I found love.
That's a tough definition.
I knew how I found it.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
From love to war.
Speaker 3 (17:49):
I felt I was in love.
I mean, you ever hear thatadage head over heels?
I actually felt like my heelswere going over my head, yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
So you really didn't know where you were.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
No, I mean I was in love.
I was in love tremendously withmy wife now my wife and with a
woman and I just knew it wasright.
So I mean I was just felt likethat.
I bought.
Can I talk about this?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
It's real personal A hundred and ten percent.
Speaker 3 (18:19):
I don't think I've told anybody this.
I bought, you know, myengagement ring, wedding ring.
You know, engagement ring, andI remember like I had it hidden
in a closet and I was doing myclinicals out in San Diego and I
would go in that closet and I'dpull that ring out and I'd look
at it and put it back, you know, and I had it in my pocket you
know, I felt like I was burninga hole in it.
Can I tell you about when Iproposed, Please?
(18:40):
This is really personal, butyou know, I, I tried, I, I, I, I
flew back from San Diego.
My wife was here in San Antonio.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
San.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
Antonio and I flew in to see her and I had, and this
thing was burning a hole in mypocket.
And I got to her apartment andI got on one knee and proposed
to her and she laughed at me,she laughed at me.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
How long did you have the ring before you proposed?
She laughed at me.
She laughed at me.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
She took it, but she laughed at me and I said, fine,
go in the kitchen and make me asandwich, because I just got off
the plane, and with lettuce andtomato and a little salt and
pepper, anyway, so she laughedat me.
She laughed at me, and thenlater on I don't know if I
should and then later on shesent me an email and she was
more serious.
So I printed that email out andframed it, because it sounds
(19:29):
like I proposed over theinternet, which of course wasn't
true at all.
But yeah, so, yes, so that'sthe story, right there.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
And you guys have been together 25 years.
So beautiful.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
So if anybody could, Married for the right reason and
again to get back to it.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
What is that reason?
Speaker 3 (19:48):
What Love is the great equalizer.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
It is.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
It is.
It's a great equalizer.
It makes everything equal andit's worth going after.
And the stories in that book,again, are not flowers and
chocolate and they're notanything.
What.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
I just said but neither is a relationship.
Speaker 3 (20:07):
No, sometimes it is, though.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
What makes it sometimes more than not.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
Chemistry, yes, and people get along Trust,
understanding.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
It's huge.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
Trust understanding.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Have you guys always been able to talk?
Speaker 3 (20:25):
I don't want to.
You know this is.
You sound like Dr Phil.
I don't want to talk about myrelationship.
Look, I don't want to talkabout my relationship at all.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
I love Mr Phil.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
You're going to get me.
You're going to paint me in acorner and get me in a lot of
trouble.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
man, I'm absolutely not.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
I need help.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
Jumbo I need help in my relationship.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
I'll talk to you offline, but not in front of the
masses.
I would do anything for you,but I would not.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
No, not in front of the masses.
Do you get married for theright reason?
Speaker 3 (20:58):
See how I answered your question.
With a it Did you get marriedfor the right reason.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
See, I answered your question with a question Did you
get married for the rightreason?
I thought.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I did Okay.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I'm not a quitter and that's the issue that I have.
Can I say something Please?
Speaker 3 (21:10):
Not to interrupt, but I can say something, please.
You don't seem like the personthat likes to fail at things.
No, you don't seem like theperson that likes to fail at
things.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
No, and having a failed marriage probably doesn't
sit well with you at all.
It really doesn't um at all didthat sting.
I didn't want it to stink no Iwas just trying to be honest no,
and I'm glad you are, becauseyou don't seem like that person
that likes to fail I do not liketo fail, and I and I've said
this before with differentindividuals that I've talked to
on the show is that I um, I canpromise you when I I go up the
(21:44):
ladder and when I fall off theladder, I'll get back up, dust
myself off and I'll go back upit, but I will never fall down
that ladder for the same reasondo you think marriage is the
worst thing you could fail at?
Speaker 3 (21:57):
Oh no, what's the worst thing you could fail?
Speaker 2 (21:58):
at what's the worst thing you could fail at.
You can fail at anything andeverything.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
Business.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
What.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
What Investments?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
You can fail at anything.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
Yeah, but what's the worst thing you could fail at?
Love?
What's the worst thing youcould fail at the subject is
love worst thing, you'd fail atthe subject is love?
Is love the worst thing?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
you could fail at.
Not in my opinion okay, noproblem.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
What is the worst thing you could fail at?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
let me try to narrow that down in a short statement.
You're the host it's your.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
You don't have to answer that question.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
No, plus, it's a free country.
Speaker 3 (22:35):
You don't have to answer that.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
I have said several times that, if I was to die
tomorrow, that I feel like Ihave shared my lessons, my
fuck-ups, my failures, my stupidchoices with kids younger than
(23:03):
me.
Anybody that, anybody, andeverybody that I can say, if you
ever learn anything from me, ifyou ever listen to anything
that I say, please just listento this one thing.
And because I wish somebodywould have taken me when I was
in your position and said youknow what, tiffany, listen to me
.
I've been there, I've done that.
This is something that willdon't follow in my own footsteps
(23:28):
and I feel like, um, I would beokay with that, like I would be
okay passing away tomorrow.
So, to answer your question,what is the worst thing that you
could fail at?
In my opinion, it is to notteach and not share your
(23:51):
experiences.
I thought you were going to saywar?
Speaker 3 (23:53):
I'm completely joking .
Just don't fucking miss whenyou're aiming bro.
I thought you were going to saywar.
I'm completely joking, but I'mjust a little levity.
Just don't fucking miss whenyou're aiming bro.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Hey hey, hey, just let him win, god damn.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Sometimes hey, come on, it was just a little levity.
If that target's moving, hey,hey, it was just a little levity
it was a little levity, it wasa little levity.
Look, now, that's all I thinkwe need it.
No, seriously, Just in a littlebit I do.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
When you said that I told God when I was 30 years old
.
I said well, I've lived likefive lifetimes and I go.
If you want to take me now,it's okay.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
And I had that conversation with God at 30.
I'm not ready and he let mestick around that much longer.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
I have so much more to do, but at 30, I was ready to
box.
I was like damn, this has beenlike awesome and thank you so
much.
And if you want to take me now,it's okay, I understand,
because frigging you're reallybeen like just like shoveling it
at me, but okay.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
No, I have a lot of things I still want to do.
I have a lot of experiences.
I have my first grandbaby andshe is the light of my life and
I have so much.
I have so much to still liveand learn and do Everybody does.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
And speaking of this book here, I addressed suicide
in it and there's three storiesin there and one is a-.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
So I want to touch base real quick before you get
to that So-.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
Because there is a lot of life out there.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Well, yes, there is yes.
So in the first book that youhave that was the white bread,
not white bread, right, and sothat one is considered a what.
I don't know why I asked youthe question.
Is that considered it's?
Speaker 3 (25:33):
a memoir.
It's a memoir, okay, storiesabout my life.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
Right, and so in this one explain the difference
between that, for people thatdon't know, and this new book.
This is the second book, thisis it's a booyah base I'm some
of.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
It is about.
This is a short storycollection, some of it is about
me, some is directly about me,without a doubt, and then some
of it is kind of a mix and um.
At the end of that book and myum editor said that's good, you
did that because at the end Ikind of talk about some of the
stories and where they came from, okay and um, some of them is
this is why this came out, andthen some are totally fiction so
(26:08):
from love to war is severalshort stories.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
That's why it's called a short story collection
well, more than seven, but gotit I think there's like.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
It's gotta be 20 at least in there.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
In here.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Yeah, it gotta be at least Nice.
I can count if you want rightnow, no, that'd be boring Anyway
.
So yeah, so you have somethingtagged there, and I'll be honest
with you.
Since I walked in, I saw thoselittle slips of paper sticking
out and it is eating at me thatwhat you decided to think that
was like this discussion worthy.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Well.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
And it's the love part, and of course it is.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
You know, valentine's Day is coming up, so what do
you have, which we both havedifferent opinions on that?
No, it's okay, it's justtotally fine.
No, it's okay, no.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
You know, everybody has their own opinion.
I just got an email recentlyabout one of the stories in the
book and someone described to mehow it related to their life
and I was very flattered aboutthat, that I actually touched
somebody through one of mystories.
And they sent a note and saidhey, you know, I read your book.
And then this happened to meand I thought about that one
(27:15):
story and go yeah, so whenpeople like samantha and it was
in the love portion or in thepeople that responding.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
How do they respond to you?
I mean, is that, how is it?
She obviously responded on theamazon, yeah it was a review.
Speaker 3 (27:30):
Right, got me a poor review, but I mean, god bless
her.
She hit a home run, she knewexactly what she was talking
about yeah because that's whatit was.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
So how the person that you were just talking about
on this part, they emailed you,or?
Speaker 3 (27:44):
My email's in the front of the book, if you have
any issues or whatever youactually.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
a lot of people don't think that you actually read
the reviews or that any authoractually reads the reviews, and
you know, good, bad, indifferent, everybody's entitled to their
opinion.
Speaker 3 (27:59):
And you know, yes, of course I read everything
without a doubt.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
I like that.
Yeah, I think that's importantthat they know that.
Well, okay, that you do payattention, I do.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
I do and I hear their voice, samantha.
Speaker 2 (28:09):
There you go.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
You hated my first book but you understood it right
.
You know, and I you know, inthat first book I try to.
I try to direct that moretowards men because men are a
minority as far as readers goand, um, I thought that book
might touch more men than womenyou know, maybe get them to read
a little bit.
They, you know, they, they won'tfeel such like you know.
You know, and the and the andthe cover is very aggressive,
let's face it.
It's red, you know, and there'sthings on it, but so and she
(28:41):
should have understood that whenshe saw the cover.
That was like ooh you know, butyeah so, and this was, I think,
different, I think this wassofter.
I think there's something inthere for everybody personally
Right right, but okay.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
So you have in here.
It says I want to make a trailwith words, a path no one has
ever walked.
Speaker 3 (29:06):
And your question.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
Explain that.
And then I'll tell you why thishits home with me.
Speaker 3 (29:22):
My writing is my writing and I don't try to mimic
anyone and I don't know it'spersonal.
There are and I don't mean tolambaste, like you know, other
writers.
Some people follow a certainscript to sell books.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Right.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
And I'm not that way.
That's it, so you know.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
So I.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Like me or hate me, you know.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Hence my card that you received in the mail.
Yeah, so yeah, I started mylittle gypsy thing a very, very
long time ago.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
You look kind of gypsy tonight, by the way.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
Thank, you Did, you do that on purpose.
No, we had a really long dayand we had to rush and ran home
and just kind of, but no.
Speaker 3 (30:17):
You look kind of gypsy tonight, thank you.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Thank you very much.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
I'm glad you thought that was flattering and not.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
It was meant to be yeah, it's, it's, it's the gypsy
way.
I mean, it is that's, that's mydeal.
But that's kind of how it allstarted.
I had a would go on theweekends and would put up my
tent and go and sell and bouncefrom place to place to place and
rodeo to rodeo, rodeo, andevery one of my little
businesses and whatever hadgypsy in it and gypsy this and
(30:47):
gypsy that, and I ran around ina murder home all over the
country and did that for a verylong time.
But anyways, I would always getasked and still do um, who are
you?
And it's which is just shocksthe shit out of me, because I'm
just some little girl from newBraunfels, texas, and um, it
(31:09):
would be, uh, just shocking tome that somebody would want to
ask me like, who am I, or why amI doing this or whatever.
So I had a slogan, that orwhatever you want to call this,
(31:32):
a statement, so to speak.
Quote A quote.
And mine is leave a trail thatevery girl wants to follow.
Run away with me, okay, andit's very similar and you
connect it to that quote Righton.
(31:53):
Which is really kind of wildbecause they're very.
Yours says I want to make atrail with words.
Mine says leave a trail thatevery girl wants to follow.
Speaker 3 (32:05):
I don't make I'm not gender specific that everyone
wants to follow.
I'm not gender specific.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
Well, on my bus mine said you can't, nowadays you
can't be gender, nothing forfuck's sake.
Speaker 3 (32:14):
No, that's, that's over.
Yeah, thank God, I understandthat Right, that ship sailed.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Yeah, so that's mine is leave a trail that everyone
must follow, Run away with me.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Well, that's the whole idea with writing.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
And again I got a note recently I don't write, I
can hardly even fucking spell,whatever Anyway, and that's the
same thing.
Speaker 3 (32:35):
I got a note recently about one of the stories in
that book where someoneconnected to it and wrote
something back to me.
And you connected to a pieceright in the in the front, the
first page, and and I'm glad youknow and you know and, yeah,
and I know you somewhat and wehave that connection now but I'm
, I'm hoping there's, you know,somebody in wherever you know
(32:57):
and in uh, norwesville, you know, whatever state and uh maybe
opens the book and reads a shortstory or reads a piece of my
work and somehow connects to it,just like an artist.
I mean, if you paint a pictureand connect and someone connects
to that, uh and um and feelsomething.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
So I mean, thank you so much for telling me that too
well, I think what's kind ofironic in um our conversation,
when you asked me what would bethe one thing that you could
fail at, I feel like you want tomake a trail with words.
I want to leave a trail thateveryone can follow, and if I
(33:37):
didn't leave my trail then Iwould have failed.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
Okay, the only thing I want, you want to hear, the
only thing I want, I think, whenI die and this is how much I
respect your sex if there's onewoman that sheds one tear when I
box, then my life was worth it.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
Well, I've shedded it during our show.
So, yeah, you uh don't goanywhere.
That's it, it's not time.
That's it, it's not time.
Speaker 3 (34:13):
That's it, that's all I'm, that's all I, and I think
my life would be worth it.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
One woman, one tear I like that one woman Heartfelt
emotions Digging from way downdeep, that's beautiful.
So here's my second one.
You ready.
Speaker 3 (34:32):
Like I said, that tore my guts out of me to write
in that book, but go ahead.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
I love that, that you're so open and you were able
to put all of this out therefor everyone and to share.
And how long did it take to putall this, all these stories,
into this book?
Speaker 3 (34:55):
I didn't time it.
I wasn't on a clock, I was inthe groove.
First book came out and I justwas like let's kick the second
one out.
Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 2 (35:10):
So this quote says we will all die.
Yeah, that is how it ends, yep.
We are all born and that is howit begins, yep.
The rest is magic and mayhem.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
It's definitely in your life 110%.
Got it down in everybody's life, hopefully.
So some people live a littlemore passive than others, but
yeah, hopefully this takes meback to a conversation that you
and I had, which hopefully it'smore magic than mayhem.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
You can always hope in one hand and shit the other,
but yeah, I'm always shootingfor the hope you know what you
never?
Speaker 3 (35:51):
you never know what?
Hey, you never know what toexpect when you're in your?
Speaker 2 (35:55):
no, when you're in the, he she shed yeah, oh my god
, I never thought that's it.
We're burning her to the ground.
Fuck, we did.
We're probably going to justkeep doing it, yeah.
So we do that, okay, so thisCut to the chase we will all die
(36:19):
, and that is how it ends.
Speaker 3 (36:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
We are all born.
Speaker 3 (36:21):
Yeah, and that is how it begins.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
Yeah, true, right.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
It is True that which ?
Speaker 1 (36:25):
takes me back to a conversation that you and I had
about you saying.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
What.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
When I am buried.
I want to be buried naked.
Speaker 3 (36:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
He does, he wants to be buried.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
Oh, you picked that out of the book, didn't you?
Speaker 2 (36:43):
No, you picked that out of the book, didn't you?
When I was reading this.
Oh, go ahead.
No, first I read all into thispart.
Speaker 3 (36:49):
Can I talk?
There's a piece in there aboutmy death.
You just didn't find it.
But go ahead and then I'll readit to you.
I'll take the book out of yourhands and I will read it.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
So, okay, perfect.
Yeah, go ahead.
Did I ruin the moment?
No, no, you didn't.
I mean no, I'm not going to letyou.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
No, You're the boss, applesauce, so the rest is magic
and mayhem.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
So we got here, we end.
So the rest is magic and mayhem, it's your dash.
Speaker 3 (37:23):
Whatever you make of it, whatever you make of it,
hopefully it is and you know,and it's that subjective too.
But yeah, I mean life is great.
I mean this planet is great, Imean everything is.
I mean, if you take a momentand think about creation, you
know, and why we're here and howwe got here.
If you take that moment andthink about the world, you know.
(37:46):
I mean all the different fishesand animals and plants and in
different, different, you know,continents and, excuse me,
latitudes, longitudes, and youput that all together and it's
just a beautiful place isn't it,it's a beautiful place and it's
what you make of it.
(38:06):
You know what you do with it andthe people you know.
You, like I said, you're really.
You cherish your relationshipswith people and how you treat
them and such and and you knowit's just.
I mean this is.
I mean I hope everybody takes amoment in their life, whenever
(38:30):
that is, I don't care if they'refive or 50 or 100 years old and
take a moment and just kind ofthink about how they got here.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (38:38):
Right.
Speaker 3 (38:38):
About life, about creation, about the world.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
We're 300 years old, right 500.
What did you say?
Years old, right 500.
Speaker 1 (38:45):
What did you say?
Your target age was my target.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
No, I said well, we should live to be yes, so we
could see the fruits of ourlabor and what we've done or
haven't done, you know.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (38:56):
And reflect on it, maybe fix it or not fix it.
Some people can't be fixed.
No, Anyway can I read yousomething out of this book,
since you?
Speaker 2 (39:04):
brought it out 110% and.
Speaker 3 (39:05):
I could find it fairly quickly.
I can't, and I want to tell youafternoon, la Floridita, look,
you're just there.
What am I looking up?
Now I know what I'm looking up.
I'm looking up something with acoffin in it.
There it is right.
There you talk about my deathbefore.
(39:31):
As Kevin Dugan grew older, heoccasionally thought about his
own death and burial.
He wondered about the placewhere he would become part of
the earth.
Kevin considered being buriedin a cardboard box with no
embalming.
He would decompose quickly andin some way become helpful again
, like an expensive fertilizerfood for the subterranean world,
(39:52):
utilitarian, not just taking upunderground space in an
impenetrable body vault.
A road could be paved over hisremains.
Trucks and cars driving bywould make sounds and vibrations
with their steel-belted tireson the asphalt.
The thought excited him morethan grass and squirrels.
(40:14):
Anyway, there's my death.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
So the thought had excited him more than grass and
squirrels.
Yeah, put me in the ground.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
cardboard box no one ball me.
Pave a road over me.
So the thought had excited himmore than grass and squirrels.
Yeah, put me in the ground.
Cardboard box, no embalming.
Pave a road over me.
I'm good, you'd like that too.
Cars going over vroom, vroom,big tractor, trailer, vibrations
, noise.
Wake you up a little bit, yeah,yeah.
(40:44):
Fiddling grass and squirrels.
Wake you up a little bit.
Yeah yeah, fiddling grass andsquirrels.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
I can relate to that.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (40:54):
That's Anyway.
So there you go.
And yeah, and I think I toldyou last time I want to be
buried naked, but I came intothe world nude.
Yeah, I want to be you know,god can have me back that way,
you know.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 3 (41:05):
He doesn't, I don't need to be dressed.
Speaker 2 (41:09):
No, I kind of agree.
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