When It Rains On Your Parade, Dust Off Your Pom-Poms

When life serves up heartbreak, true friendship becomes the medicine that heals our deepest wounds. In this raw and revealing episode, Tiffany welcomes back her best friend friend Kel to the she-shed for a conversation that touches every emotional note on the spectrum.

What begins as lighthearted catching up—Kel's dramatic hair transformation and tales of Tiffany's upcoming SPF 90 Tour—gradually unveils something much more profound. For the first time publicly, Tiffany courageously shares her painful journey through separation after discovering her husband's extensive infidelity spanning eight years and multiple women. Her vulnerability offers powerful wisdom: "Life is too short to be married to an asshole," speaking directly to anyone who's ever stayed too long in a relationship that diminishes their worth.

Between emotional revelations, the conversation takes delightfully unexpected turns. We learn about the traditions behind Mardi Gras king cakes (including why finding the baby inside is both lucky and costly), the absurdity of Animal Control investigating Tiffany's well-cared-for lemur Fiona (only to discover the officer was connected to her childhood friend), and their upcoming adventures in Fredericksburg wine country.

This episode beautifully demonstrates how friendship creates safe spaces where we can be authentic, whether sharing tears over betrayal or laughing about emergency roadside bathroom breaks. Through it all, Tiffany reminds us that no matter how hard the rain falls on our parade, we always have the choice to dust off our pom-poms and keep dancing.

Join us for this emotional rollercoaster that will leave you reflecting on your own relationships while feeling like you've just shared a glass of wine with your closest friends. And remember—when life gets tough, sometimes all you need is a friend who'll hand you a tissue and help you find your way forward.

The Rambling Gypsy podcast is a behind-the-scenes look at the lives of real Texans doing real sh*t. We're pulling back the curtains on our daily lives - and you're invited to laugh and learn along with us.

Links:
http://www.youtube.com/@TheRamblingGypsy
https://www.facebook.com/GypsyMammaTiff/
https://www.instagram.com/GypsyMammaTiff/
https://www.theramblinggypsypodcast.com/

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:09):
I don't know how you drive a car.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
Kel Kel's back in the she shed.
Hello friend, hi darling, Ibarely remembered how to get
here.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
You did.

Speaker 2 (00:23):
And then the wind.
You know it's pretty serioustoday.

Speaker 3 (00:27):
You haven't been here in forever.
It's been a hot minute.
By the way, I'm Tiffany Foy andthis is the Ramblin' Gypsy
podcast.
She is and this is my girl,kel-kel, and she hasn't been
here in forever, so long thatyou don't even remember how to
get here.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
It was a nice scenic route, though Pause why?

Speaker 1 (00:51):
does your car not have me on auto map?
Oh, it does, it does.
It drives itself you know, Imean literally.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
I kept looking around With your fancy car.
Yeah, everything drives itself.
What have you been doing?
What have I been doing?
Where have you been Not havingany fun?
I'm sure of that.

Speaker 3 (01:05):
Well, first let's talk about your hair.
Okay, so we have um.
We have pics of said eventbecause um amber at felgen
friends in new brunfels does ourhair hair donation pile holy
moses?
You have got more hair.
Yeah, but you've been growingit out for how long?

Speaker 2 (01:24):
years.
It was two years.
I made it jesus, time flies.
And then, uh, one day I justdecided what am I doing with my
life?
My sister said if it's notbringing you joy, get rid of it.

Speaker 3 (01:35):
Get rid of it I said fuck it like baggage, it'll grow
back.
Well, amber was very um,hesitant, yes, cautious,
conscious, whatever.
So hesitant, yes, cautious,conscious, whatever.

Speaker 2 (01:46):
So I started with her when I was already in the grout
.
She was very gentle with me andshe's more like a long hair
girl.
And then it's like just keepcutting it, Just keep cutting it
.
And she's like are you sure?
Are you sure this is reallydrastic?
I'm like, I know, I'm kind ofdrastic.

Speaker 3 (02:00):
And I was there under the dryer and kept saying, nope
, that's not, she's not going tolike it, it's not short enough.

Speaker 2 (02:06):
Keep doing it, it's not short enough.

Speaker 3 (02:08):
Keep cutting, Cut more.
And then she would try to pushit down and you would say I'm
not a school teacher.
Wait, she looked like asubstitute teacher yes, yeah,

(02:29):
and then you'd turn around andshe was like I'm like no, no,
she's like that's what she does,that's what she does.
She gotta make it all.

Speaker 2 (02:32):
Yeah, it was you know it's a new season, bring the
spice back, yeah, yeah.
So now we're back to your, yourwild hair.

Speaker 3 (02:34):
Now mine's chopping off.
You're doing the el natural.

Speaker 2 (02:35):
Well, yeah, I guess a braid break, dread break, yes
yeah, I'm giving my head alittle rest.

Speaker 3 (02:41):
A dreaded break, literally a dreaded break.
I'm giving myself a dreadedbreak, literally a dreaded break
.
I'm giving myself a dreadedbreak.
And yeah, because you knowwe're leaving for the SPF 90
tour in April, for the podcast.
I'm thinking that you may haveto hop a plane and April's like
right around, like this April.
This one Girl, four weeks fouror five weeks away, you better

(03:01):
check the calendar.
Uh huh, yeah, so you may haveto.
So four or five weeks away, youbetter check the calendar.
Uh-huh, yeah, so you may haveto.
So we originally were talkingabout going six weeks.
We're doing 11 states, sixweeks and because we have to be
back here in may, so we've nowsplit it.
So we're going to do threeweeks, then we're coming back,
we're going to finish out thesummer and then we haven't
decided.
We tentatively have talkedabout leaving september, but we

(03:23):
may scoot it up Spring and fallMay, scoot it up to do the last
three weeks in August, dependingon how summer goes, because you
know we have the resort andwe're usually slammed and it's
Memorial Day to Labor Day.

Speaker 2 (03:36):
And so we're trying to.
I believe it's almost rivertime again, like we just had
this conversation, I know thisyear just flew by.

Speaker 3 (03:47):
I feel like we were just sitting on the porch not
that long ago talking aboutMardi Gras and you're pissed off
because I didn't show up in mygear.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
Yeah, well, this year .

Speaker 3 (03:51):
Today.
I text you earlier and I saidlook, I'm going to, I don't, I'm
doing it.
Do it as cute as you do.
But I did whip out my hat.
What do think about my hat?
That is an incredible hat,thank you.
I made this a very, very longtime ago and me and um, my
feathers were kind of on point,but then steiner and everyone.
If you know steiner steiner atesteiner steiner licked them.

(04:12):
That's the real story.

Speaker 2 (04:14):
She licked the feathers.
Anyone else?
You know it sounds completelyfictitious, but you know, you
know somebody ate them, yeah.

Speaker 3 (04:22):
Um so, marty girl, that's your favorite holiday,
your favorite everything.

Speaker 2 (04:26):
I'm a little bitter about it this year.

Speaker 3 (04:29):
First of all, I don't want to interrupt you but I'm
going to.
And you should be bitter,because last year you let rowan
keep up the christmas tree andyou did a mardi gras I did and
this year you suck that'sprobably why everything fell
through for me.

Speaker 2 (04:42):
that's what I think.
I didn't have enough spiritobviously.
Then it froze the weekend wehad planned to go Like 20 degree
weather, like literal rain onthe fucking parade, like nobody
rains on my parade.
They actually had rain on theparade and they actually did.
A lot of it got canceled andtoday is Fat Tuesday, which is
like the grim finale of MardiGras and I hear they're having

(05:03):
75 mile an hour wins.
Canceled all the parades.
Somebody rolled at 6 30 thismorning.

Speaker 3 (05:16):
So anyway, I didn't just miss Mardi Gras, most
people did.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
How do you cancel a whole parade?
I mean, I guess, wow, I don'tknow Freezing rain.
You know they had snow, justlike last month in louisiana,
like record-breaking.
So do they reschedule stufflike that?
I don't know, they rescheduleda few, but today's the end, like
tomorrow's ash wednesday.

Speaker 3 (05:31):
It's over, party's over the dust is in the wind and
on your forehead.
Yeah, exactly, yeah, all thatwow, so that's depressing.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
Today is the only day I even got to wear Mardi Gras
stuff.
Well, if you would have keptyour tree up, clearly Okay next
year.
I even told you you could comeand get a tiny tree for Rowan,
so y'all could still decorate it.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
Damn it, but you didn't do it Clearly I'm a
failure, that's what happenswhen you have no spirit.

Speaker 2 (05:58):
No.

Speaker 3 (06:00):
You get rain on your parade.
You brought this shit uponyourself.
I probably did so.
I wonder what happens with allthe cakes.
People still going to go outand party.
And still eat the cake.

Speaker 2 (06:09):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, at least you can do the cake at
your house.

Speaker 3 (06:11):
Oh, yeah, not weather dependent Right.
Didn't you have a king cakelast year?

Speaker 2 (06:14):
Yeah, we do every year.

Speaker 3 (06:19):
Didn't do that either .
Do you have?

Speaker 2 (06:20):
your people make them .
Yes, you can.

Speaker 3 (06:23):
Absolutely you can.
You don't just go to the HEBs.
That's not the same.
It's not the same.

Speaker 2 (06:28):
One time I ordered something on Amazon where you
make it yourself.
Stop, we did.

Speaker 3 (06:34):
Wait, do you have a picture of?

Speaker 2 (06:35):
this.
I do have a picture.
I'll find it.

Speaker 3 (06:38):
Okay, because I need to see it, you go to the website
.

Speaker 2 (06:40):
Yeah girl, we had the .
We put beads on it, we put the.
I feel like I remember apicture.

Speaker 3 (06:44):
Purple and yellow and green sugar on it or was this?
A Mardi Gras box or somethingy'all made.
Didn't Rowan make a box?
Wait what am I thinking about?
That was his Valentine's Daybox.
Okay, yes, I had to bring overthe hot glue gun for someone,
that's right, and he used itagain this year some stuff to it
.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
Light still worked.
Oh, his teacher was soimpressed and I was impressed
that I didn't have to makeanother box.
That's good.
I didn't.

Speaker 3 (07:06):
Yeah, I didn't my phone didn't ring for the glue
gun hustle game strong.
Well, that's good.
Yeah, that's good.
So do you have a king cake atthe house?

(07:28):
Not yet.
I guess I better go.
I failed.

Speaker 2 (07:32):
It's just a mess, you know, I'm going to just call it
a wash.
Okay, I'm going to try hardernext year.

Speaker 3 (07:37):
What is so special about a king cake?

Speaker 2 (07:39):
It has a baby inside.

Speaker 3 (07:41):
You need to tell everybody that doesn't know.

Speaker 2 (07:43):
This is your deal Sweet bread, you can pick your
flavors, you know to telleverybody that doesn't know,
because this is your deal Sweetbread, you can pick your flavors
.
You know it has like that.

Speaker 3 (07:48):
I didn't realize it had different flavors.

Speaker 2 (07:50):
You can do gray, you can do like raspberry and cream
cheese inside there.
Girl, yes, really.
So they had the baby under thecake and if you get the baby
you're supposed to buy the nextcake, because there's more than
one cake.
There's not more than one baby.
It's kind of like a donut.
There's only one baby in thecake.
I guess they used to bake itinside and then people were like
choking on it, so now they justsit on top of it.

(08:12):
So now you've got to read thefine print.

Speaker 3 (08:14):
You've got to pay attention how hungry are you?

Speaker 2 (08:17):
You just ate the baby you just ate the baby.

Speaker 3 (08:19):
So there's a baby in each cake.
Yep, what's?

Speaker 1 (08:21):
the purpose of putting the baby in the cake.

Speaker 2 (08:23):
You know, I don't know, and I just bought a Mardi
Gras book and it was all aboutthe king cake baby.
There's really not anexplanation that.
I know I'm actually from here,texas.
I just have a lot of spirit.

Speaker 3 (08:33):
You just do have a lot of spirit, but just not in
the year 2025.
Oh man.

Speaker 2 (08:37):
We're going to pick up the spirit.
I'll need to are dusty, dustthem all apart.

Speaker 3 (08:48):
Dust off your pom-poms.
That's good, solid advice, nomatter what you're going through
.
I've never looked up the wholebaby thing.
I've seen it because we took it, you saved it.
We had to glue it on the box onthe valentine's box

Speaker 2 (08:55):
this year.
He didn't want to be naked, soI had to glue a little blanket.
That's very, very kind andthoughtful, good, good looking
out.

Speaker 3 (09:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (09:05):
Strong work.

Speaker 3 (09:05):
Yeah, likes the naked baby it is.
It's supposed to be baby Jesus.

Speaker 2 (09:12):
Yeah, the king's suffering.
Okay, all right.
Well, I didn't study for thepop quiz today.
I've been having a hard week.
My dog ate my homework, okay,and like there was things and
stuff, and then, in the spiritof giving, if you get the baby

(09:32):
in the cake, then you buy thenext year's cake Pay it forward.
Oh, I think it's like the nextday's cake.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
You get back to back cakes.
Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (09:40):
Ooh, I mean mean it's like a donut, it's like a
dessert, like it's, yeah, andthen everybody, you got to leave
the knife in the box.

Speaker 3 (09:46):
that's like a rule if you get the baby, it's supposed
to mean that you're lucky andyou have prosperity, so you can
then afford to now see if I'mgoing to be baking my own cake
and I know where I'm going toput the baby in the cake that's
called a yeah, I know, I put outa baby trap yeah, baby baby
trap put it in the cake beforeyou put the icing on and put a
little hole in the bottom of it,and then you put the icing in a

(10:09):
different color sugar.
so you really don't know whereit's at Before you bake the cake
.

Speaker 2 (10:13):
No, this is like a ring.
You bake the cake first.

Speaker 3 (10:16):
Oh, and then you put the icing in the yellow and the
it's like and all the thingsInteresting Okay.

Speaker 2 (10:24):
But if you put the icing on first, you know at
least which color it'sunderneath.
You don't do that.

Speaker 3 (10:28):
We're getting lost in it.
Yeah, we're going to find thebaby.
I'm going to need a dry eraseboard and I'm going to need a
pointer that says laser.
So how this starts is first youstart with the purple, then you
get the green, then maybe theyellow.
There's a map to the baby.
She'll put it on a PDF.
Yeah, no, she's going to makeus a smart, a dumb version.

(10:52):
King baby cake for dummies,chapter one, and go Cut, yeah.
So what else has been going on?
So you had a hard week.

Speaker 2 (11:03):
Yeah, might go to a I don't know about Tuesday,
something tonight.

Speaker 3 (11:08):
Yeah, what are y'all doing at the bar?

Speaker 2 (11:12):
Um, I think they're having mini king cakes and like
hurricane.

Speaker 1 (11:15):
Should each one have babies in them?

Speaker 2 (11:16):
That's a good question.
They better Well, he didn'thave me ordering a baby's on
Amazon, so probably not Sorryabout your baby.
Sorry about your baby and yourluck.
No babies allowed.
21 and up.
Yep, hurricane shots yeah, whatare those?
It's like rum and a lot ofjuice and juice, a lot of rum, a
lot of rum.

(11:37):
Mostly rum.
So Captain Jack Sparrow wouldbe dancing around.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
Make a pint, make a pint.
That would be a fat Tuesday,not going to lie.
Nothing like a good dose ofblack eyeliner and some room.

Speaker 2 (11:51):
I mean, he does it well.

Speaker 3 (11:52):
He's such a beautiful species of a man, I don't know
why he's an interesting creature, that's for sure.

Speaker 2 (11:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (12:02):
So we have Fat Tuesdays happening, then you
haven't been here forever.
I know I feel like we have somuch to talk.
We have Fat Tuesdays happening,then you haven't been here
forever.
I know I feel like we have somuch to talk about.

Speaker 2 (12:09):
I had no time, our whole friendship just went to
shit right now.
You did this on purpose.

Speaker 3 (12:13):
This is stupid.

Speaker 2 (12:14):
Everybody's been asking where's Kelvin, where's
Kelvin?
So then we have so much to talkabout, and here we are.
Here we are A month later.
Thank god, my car drove me here.

Speaker 3 (12:24):
I can't believe that alright, so what?
Else you having any fun no, no,it's actually crunch time for
the tour, and so we're starting.
I'm starting to get into panicmode.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
It's always a good idea and it's like oh shit.
Who's gonna do all this right?

Speaker 3 (12:37):
yep, so we're, we're figuring all that out and we've
got a pretty good.
We've got the tour lineup, wehave the dates all set up and
then I'm super excited on thesecond half of the tour.
Um, we're headed to alabama andI am going to go and meet math
matthews, the comedian, mr um,he's got his obviously his

(13:04):
tiktoks, and he's got his farmand he does boudoir photo shoot.
Stop it.
Yep, we talked about a year agoand then um got back in touch
with them and so it's gonna takeus yeah um, about three, four
hours kind of off the beatenpath, but it's gonna absolutely
be freaking worth it.

Speaker 2 (13:24):
Oh, I can't wait for those pictures every.

Speaker 3 (13:28):
I mean just the entertainment and I feel like
that he is just my spirit animaland so I am so stupid excited
about doing the whole thing withhim, because he's now on tour
doing comedy shows and that's alot of yeah I look forward to no
yeah, I always feel like, evenwhen it sucks, I have to like
look at that calendar and try tolike just find there's

(13:49):
something else fun coming up.

Speaker 2 (13:52):
You know just whatever it takes to get you
through, can you believe thekids are gonna be all school for
spring breaks?
You're like two weeks away.
We have.

Speaker 1 (14:01):
What are we gonna do?
What are y'all gonna go?
What are y'all doing?

Speaker 2 (14:05):
I don't know.
Every time we plan things wayout, it just gets wrecked so
we're just going to decide andgo because we don't have long
enough to fuck up your plan.
I mean, they can still.
Anything can happen hurricaneforce, winds, flood drought.

Speaker 3 (14:24):
I'm surprised we haven't had in a long minute.

Speaker 2 (14:26):
I know it's coming.
It is coming.
They're all going to besurprised too.

Speaker 3 (14:30):
I think so All those new houses.
We have for spring break.
We are going to Fredericksburg,me and Nick, drinking some wine
.
We're going to drink some ofthat, for sure, but we're going
to go and do um some businessshows, some interviews,
introduce a lot of people to umlocal businesses and some

(14:52):
wineries down there.
You know curtis has got his bardown there at the top now oh
wow we went and visited thatlast weekend and it was so much
fun.
And they have this huge outdoorarea for the kids.
It's all fenced in, um, it'soff the beaten path, it's
steiner can go, yes and so, andit's it's.

(15:12):
It's like on the outskirts offredericksburg, so you cruise
through main street and then yougo about another 10 months.
I love fredericksburg and sowe're going to go there.
We're going to go there, we'regoing to go to the Elks Lodge.
I mean not the lodge, it's theElks, it's Todd owns that.
And then Lincoln Street andVaudeville and who else do we

(15:35):
have on there?
Nick, we've got.
Oh, grape Creek.
We'll go visit Kim and the crewfrom Grape Creek that I've been
Business and pleasure tour.

Speaker 2 (15:43):
It is you had me at wine, oh my gosh.

Speaker 3 (15:46):
And so it was kind of crazy because we talked about
doing this and it was actuallynick's idea.
We've been talking about goingand hitting up just random areas
, but her, her bio, is cominginto town and wants to go to
fredericksburg and I said, well,that's cool, because it's only
an hour, little you know an hourto get there staycation, yeah,
and so I said you know nick youknow your an hour to get there,
Staycation yeah.
And so I said you know, Nick,you know your girl likes some
wine.

(16:06):
And so we're not going to berunning back and forth.
She's like, oh well, buy alittle DDS.
And so I was like, okay, done,let's go.

Speaker 2 (16:14):
I'm sorry, and there's a driver Right.
Yeah, let's go.

Speaker 3 (16:18):
So, yeah, we've got that all narrow, so that's going
to be a good time.
I'm super excited.

Speaker 2 (16:22):
You'll have to let me know when that goes down.

Speaker 3 (16:23):
Yeah, you definitely need to come and do.

Speaker 2 (16:25):
I have to work Like the vaudeville visit.

Speaker 3 (16:28):
If you guys have never been to vaudeville, this
place it's a two story buildingon main street, white.
So this beautiful upper balcony, the upper level, is literally
off the street.
And then you walk down below towhere the restaurant is, and on

(16:49):
sundays they have the bestfried chicken you will ever
taste in your entire life it islike this hidden recipe.
It is, there is.
You know me and I'm a foodie.
I love me some good food andthis fried chicken is retarded
and they will make it until, Imean, you get there Until they

(17:10):
run out and it's done.
Yeah, and you need to be thereat a decent time and yeah, they
close it too.
And I'm telling you it is worthgetting up on a Sunday morning
and making the dry toFrederick's.
Oh, do they ever dry toFrederick's?
Oh, do they ever Fresh squeezedAll the things?
They have a little bakeryinside there, zuchas, checking

(17:30):
out all the things.
Yeah, so I'm excited about that.
So that's what we're doingspring break we're just going to
be running up and down fromFredericksburg for five days.
I'm going to have to get in onthat Five days in a row, you
need to.

Speaker 2 (17:42):
We'll have to have your people get with my people.

Speaker 3 (17:45):
Okay, want to put Rowan on speed dial if you will,
yeah.

Speaker 2 (17:49):
Holler at him.
Uh-huh, that poor guy.
Oh my gosh, just heartbroken.
I packed for nothing and I waslike I packed for just in case
we were ready.
We were going to get to go theother night night I was putting

(18:10):
him to bed and he went in thereand he was missing for a few
minutes ago.
And his bed is made, I meanfabulously, with all the stuffed
animals and everything is, andI'm like it looks so good Like
you're a really good bed maker.
But you know it's time to go tobed now.
I just wasted all that time andI was like how about you do this
, like, like I don't know whenyou wake up?
Or like any other time.

Speaker 3 (18:24):
Yeah, that way you learn there's a thing that I
shared a while back, and it'sabout making your bed, and we
see if you can find that, nick.
There's a deal about.
We make our bed every day.
I literally um, since it's beenjust me and my animals in my
bed for a long minute.

(18:45):
It has been absolute becausethere was a human in there when
I would get up and be leaving,but it has been one of the best
things that I have ever done isgetting up and making your bed
every single day.

Speaker 2 (19:02):
And just to have it everything put together, you
know how my house is set upbecause the door's right there.

Speaker 3 (19:07):
So when you're in the living room.
If my door is open, you see mywhole entire bedroom.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
So it's either Our deal is whoever gets up last
makes the bed Right, and I workearly.

Speaker 3 (19:18):
So yeah.

Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah, he's a real good bed maker.
Well, that's good, pillows andeverything.

Speaker 1 (19:22):
That's good I don't know why we need to throw
pillows.
Listen.

Speaker 2 (19:25):
It makes it pretty.
It's about like I'm veryaffected by my environment.
Yes, so I feel like if there'slike shit everywhere, I can't
relax and it's like, yeah, it'sa pain in the ass to do it, but
like it feels so good.
Just it says something abouthow, when you Relieving your

(19:50):
stress.

Speaker 3 (19:50):
Encouraging good habits.
Start the day with positivity.

Speaker 2 (19:52):
Start your day with positivity.
As I'm swinging my pillowaround in the air going, no, I'm
just not a morning person.
Not a morning person goes offevery day and I'm like I'm good
yeah.
Someday I'm going to sleep.

Speaker 3 (20:03):
No, there's like a poem or there's something.
I feel like there's somethingto that there is, I feel like.
Emily Roberts is one thatshared it with me years ago?
She probably did start it withpositivity she's a little
fucking energizer yeah.

Speaker 2 (20:18):
Funny, and what have you?
She's a good one, yeah, yeah,but there's.
You'll like um side note, yeah,but that is a good habit.
I mean, I feel like, just putshit back where it goes.
I'm trying to teach that to mychildren.
Um guess why you can't find it?

(20:40):
Because you didn't put it backwhere it went ever anytime.

Speaker 3 (20:44):
Well, that is, that's all good and fine and dandy in
theory, but at the same time,I'm the first one that puts
things where I think I know I'mgonna put it.
If it doesn't have an assignedseating, yeah, then turn to your
assigned seats.

Speaker 2 (20:59):
I use that a lot.
I use it with my boobs allkinds of reasons and need to get
back where they belong togethergirls I mean the day it's not
even 5 o'clock yet.

Speaker 3 (21:15):
I mean it is Fat Tuesday, so I guess you could
just it's 5 o'clock all day.
I'm pretty sure you know, letthem out, let them do whatever.
I didn't even realize thattoday was Fat Tuesday.
Well, of course, this isn'tgoing to air until whatever, but
I mean.
It's irrelevant.
Well, I mean, I guess, becausethe parades are canceled.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (21:31):
Nobody knows what day it is anymore.

Speaker 3 (21:33):
Nobody's going to get to eat.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
It's like that time between Christmas and New Year's
Nobody knows what day it is.
Yes, does it even matter?

Speaker 3 (21:39):
Yeah, that's kind of how I feel like here lately,
because we've been working sevendays a week and then I feel
like I've been working sevendays a week Just going and going
, and going and going.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
I'm like what March you see, I posted?
I think it was like Februarywas a little.

Speaker 3 (21:53):
Oh my gosh, nick told me and it was so cute, come on
in, sit down, don't fuckingtouch nothing.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
And I said was she?

Speaker 2 (22:03):
talking to March or was she talking to Rowan?
That was my response.
You can place that with Rowanevery time.
That is so cute.

Speaker 3 (22:08):
So cute, it's just.
And his school pictures.
Oh, can we talk about his shirtuntucked with his With?

Speaker 2 (22:15):
the vest With the blazer and the vest.
It's like a 5T or something.
The vest, he had to have thevest I said, buddy, it's too
small.

Speaker 1 (22:21):
It's so cute, I was like oh okay, everybody's.

Speaker 2 (22:25):
Like was that for like a dance or was it like a
something?
No, that's his regular-assschool picture.
Uh-huh, he wanted to wear asuit.
I texted my friend.
I said that, boutonniere, yougot your money's worth of five
years ago at your wedding.
Five years ago.
He keeps re-wearing it.
He'll move it from suit to suit, yeah girl.

Speaker 3 (22:43):
Okay, first of all, let's talk about wedding.
So Nick just got home from alittle adventure oh yeah, mm
little adventure, oh yeah yeah,and it was a situation.
God love the whole thing, butwe have decided that we could

(23:03):
become um insta coordinatorsyeah, you are an insta
coordinator, which I love, youknow, I love you're like you
want to have a wedding thisweekend, I'll pull that boom and
done skis and I'm like that'swhat I weekend.
Yeah, don't ask me for one twoweekends from now, because I
ain't got time.

Speaker 2 (23:16):
I will overthink it.
You were well under pressure,yeah.

Speaker 3 (23:18):
That is your jam and my poor girl, which you know.
We're never apart and so, andwhen she's stressed, I lose my
ever-loving mind.
And she is messaging me andy'all are going back to the
Airbnb to make the boutonnieres.
The wedding is tomorrow, intomorrow.
It was like a boutonnieremaking party Of one.

(23:41):
It was Nick party of one, nickparty of one.
Grab your flowers and your hotglue gun.

Speaker 2 (23:48):
We did the bridesmaids bouquets the day
before and the boutonnieres theday right before the wedding.

Speaker 3 (23:54):
Nick had to run.
First of all, we had acoordinator.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
You're stressing me out just talking about it.
Thank you very much.

Speaker 3 (23:59):
Do you know how many times I had to put deodorant on,
and I was four and a half hoursaway from her?

Speaker 2 (24:03):
She's messed up, she's driving in her friend's
car.

Speaker 3 (24:06):
I said look.
I'm going to either have tojump down the highway or get me
a Jetsons little plane.

Speaker 2 (24:13):
Oh, my goodness, I have it on camera.

Speaker 3 (24:15):
I had to run that down.
She had to run down the aislewith the rings during the
ceremony.

Speaker 2 (24:24):
Personal assistant.
I chose service.
They paid a coordinator.
You should have took thatbitch's money For real.

Speaker 3 (24:32):
Oh no, I mean build an invoice, babe.
You're good at it, can you?

Speaker 2 (24:37):
imagine, Kel.
Can you block your sister fromwatching this?
Can you block her from thevideo?

Speaker 3 (24:40):
She needs to know.
She needs to know the hell sheput her sister through.
Send her a thank you card.

Speaker 1 (24:46):
Oh my gosh Lord.

Speaker 2 (24:48):
I'm mad at you.

Speaker 3 (24:48):
I was so stressed for Nick and for the whole
situation and for her sister.

Speaker 2 (24:51):
Thank you for sharing that stretch Her sister to
pieces Because, my goodness, Igot it on camera.

Speaker 3 (24:57):
You can see me running down the aisle.

Speaker 2 (24:58):
I believe you.
I believe you a thousandpercent.

Speaker 3 (25:05):
Then not to mention all the bullshit.
Then there's a particular colorof this dress that Nick's got
to wear.
So we and I know I bought,bought 487 dresses.
You've seen one.
Hell you've worn four or fiveof them Dresses for my kid's
wedding in Cabo, and I knew Ihad the perfect color and I knew

(25:26):
I had the perfect dress.
You always do, I lookedeverywhere in my wardrobe.

Speaker 2 (25:33):
Oh yeah, she asked me .
I said I've what I found myrentals guess what I found this
morning the dress you neededlast week, not both of not one,
but both of them for nick.

Speaker 3 (25:45):
And she goes are you freaking, kidding me?

Speaker 2 (25:47):
but the wedding's over.

Speaker 3 (25:47):
Yeah, I sent her a picture, but then so she's got
her sister's dress that shewanted her to wear.
So her and I because we doeverything on the fly we had it
on the calendar 47 times to gotake her to the seamstress to
get it, you know, edited orwhatever that yeah, and we

(26:09):
didn't.
So then we wait five to sevendays beforehand and our girl,
our go-to, is like no, mija, wecan't do this.
This is a big project.
No.
So I look at Nick and I waslike well, we're going to punt.
And I knew there were severalpeople in our community that

(26:30):
have reached out on our localpages and what have you?
So I know there's a wholeplethora of.
And the girl that we went tofirst, she's right above
celebrations, she's an absolutefucking rock star.
She's got a whole team ofseamstresses in the back room
and they're not 12.
They're of age, they're grown upyeah they're big girls, okay,
and they are kicking ass andtaking names, but they're also

(26:52):
doing everybody in celebrationsand what have you.
So they're booked out there.
Yeah, they busy.
So, yeah, we had a couple ofpeople, we had posted a deal on
our new Broncos local page andwe got some really good people
contacts and yeah, that's goodOne of them instant messaged us
immediately and said yeah, bringit by.

(27:14):
So Nick went by I think two dayslater, and this was not just a
hem up the skirt, this was takenin five inches removed, the
zipper squeezed it in, notsomething you could do.

Speaker 2 (27:24):
Obviously Add a couple of pleats, yeah.

Speaker 3 (27:26):
Then you got to hem the.
This was a full-on remodel andsure as shit had it done.
Sister had it done, said sheremodel.
And uh, sure shit had it done.
Sister had it done, said she'dhave it done on tuesday.
Had it done on sunday afternoon.
What was it nick?
45 bucks, 70 bucks, 70 bucksseems just for the band on
remodel.
Better keep that girl's guardfor real and give her plugs,

(27:48):
because yeah hell yeah, and yeahand then sure shit.
Today, when I was trying tofind something, green to wear
for this.
Mardi Gras deal.
I go in there and what do Ifind?
Two blue dresses.
Man, I hate that.
I was so frustrated.
I was like I cannot believethis shit.
Somebody didn't put it backwhere it went, but I didn't,
you're right.

Speaker 2 (28:08):
That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 3 (28:16):
I think they do it just to fuck with me too, but it
is so.
Now I know where they are.
So for the next, blue weddingfor real?

Speaker 2 (28:19):
I'm not going anywhere with?

Speaker 3 (28:19):
no, we're not.
We're going to divorce partiesthat is a.
Thing let me tell you what Ican't wait.
I don't know what the fuck hasbeen going on in 2024 and it's
carrying over to 2025, but it isin the air.
Yeah, it is in the air, andit's so sad and I'm right smack
dab in the middle of it.
But you are not alone no, and Idid not realize that I was not.

(28:44):
I mean, right, I'm sure youalways feel that you're alone.
And um, we've not talked aboutit publicly, obviously we kept
it on the down low.
Sure, I haven't said one word.
Not that I give two shits totalk about my personal life,
because, well, that part of itis not that interesting.

(29:06):
But let me tell you something,and you know every single thing.
You've been through me.
You've been through this withme from day one, nick.
There's not one thing that youdon't know.
There's not one thing that Nickdon't know.
There's not one thing that Tinadon't know.
There's not one thing thatBrooks don't know.
You four people have been myrocks from the beginning to
today.

(29:26):
But one thing I do want to sayto everybody out there that one,
the purple people eater yeah,no, people's personal business
is not your own period.
But in today's world, intoday's society, in everything

(29:51):
that we are doing, hell.
I'm sitting here doing afucking podcast telling everyone
about my personal shit.
Well, it's gonna come out,whether you want it to or not,
and so you want to hear.
My might as well clear the airmight as well clear the air.
I am a firm believer.

(30:15):
I'm absolutely disgusted in,and I absolutely cannot stand, a
cheater.
I think it is a pussy move.
I think it is disgusting, Ithink it is insecure, I think it
is weak.
I'm always like just it'sabsolutely disrespectful.

(30:40):
I feel like if you have theurge to do that and leave, then
do it, but do not, exactly, donot drag your partner, your
significant other, your roommate, your whoever it is that you
are involved in.
They do not deserve that Period.
Be open, be honest.

(31:01):
That's what you signed up for.

Speaker 2 (31:03):
That's what you said you were going to do.

Speaker 3 (31:06):
If you don't walk away, then do that.
It's not fair, I think it'sdisrespectful, I think it's rude
, I think it's everything andthen some.
It's hurtful.

Speaker 2 (31:18):
And still, you know I mean it reflects on you
regardless you have to deal with.
You know the questions and howare you doing?
And you know it's like do Iwant to like, keep it from
everyone?
No, I mean having to digthrough someone's story having
to save someone.

Speaker 3 (31:33):
You don't have to do that, but once you find it one
time, it never goes away.
It you constantly see it.
Every time that person islooking at their phone, you, you
, you can't help it.
And then, when you find it onetime, and then you find it
another time, and you find itanother time and you've got
somebody else that is tellingyou that it's happening, and
then you find out it's happeningagain, and then you find out

(31:54):
it's been happening for eightyears With 14 women.
It really kind of kicks you inthe balls.
Reach out to your friends Toreach out to your friends.

Speaker 2 (32:03):
Is this sound crazy?
Or is this me Right?
No, ma'am, right, walk away,figure out, get a plan.
Whatever you have to do, don'tlife is too short it is too
short that it is.
It is too short to be marriedto an asshole.

Speaker 3 (32:18):
Too short to be made to feel like that's all you've
got and as harmful as it is andas when you don't think that it
can happen to you, it absolutelycan happen to you.
I never said that it couldnever happen to me.
Hell, it's not the first timeit's happened to me.
Um, it's actually my secondrodeo.
Yeah, I know, yeah, kind of donewith these rodeos, but it is,

(32:41):
um, I just feel like I just wantto share with everybody and
anybody that's listening,anybody that is in this
situation.
Don't sell yourself short.
Um, I am at a time in my life,an age in my life, where, for
whatever reason, I kind of hadthe you know what fucking

(33:05):
attitude and I let it go and Ikept believing, and I kept
believing, and I kept believingand I kept allowing it and it'll
get better.

Speaker 2 (33:17):
Can't believe me.
And I kept allowing it.
And it'll get better.
Maybe if I just ignore it.
Right, right and didn't getbetter.
No, you had got yourself better, yeah, so and look how happy
you are how hard.

Speaker 3 (33:26):
However hard the struggle is um, and I've said it
gotta not just in personalrelationships, but in business
and in life in general.
You're going to fall off thatladder a million times, or maybe
you're not, but if you do, justdon't fall off the same fucking
time.
Change your shoes, change yourstability level.

Speaker 1 (33:51):
Change whoever's holding the ladder, yeah.

Speaker 3 (33:55):
Change how you went up there.
If you fell down, just don'tfall down it the same way twice,
because then you didn't learnyour lesson.
So this has been a really hardlesson for me to learn and, to
be honest, what is the lesson inthis whole freaking thing?
Do I know?

Speaker 2 (34:17):
You love yourself more.
You don't let someone dictatethe way you should feel about
yourself, or someone that'sconstantly insulting you and
getting inside your head.
I mean, just makes you look ata person like it's just
disappointing, like I chose you.

Speaker 3 (34:37):
And I still think it's disappointing and I still,
I'm still very sad about it, I'mvery disappointed.

Speaker 2 (34:45):
Ultimately yes I mean .

Speaker 3 (34:46):
It's not what we signed up for.
That's a big letdown.
It's very disappointing.
It's hard to swallow.
It's very, very, very hard toswallow.
It's hard to swallow.
It's very, very, very hard toswallow.
It's hard to get over.
Um, there are words that weresaid I can never take back.

Speaker 2 (35:02):
Sorry, doesn't take it away, but you know, I think
and here goes my emotions,because that's me.

Speaker 3 (35:10):
I think that it's most of the times you don't
remember all the good.
You always the bad just showsup in your face and slaps you
right in the balls.
And I feel like with this deal,it's all the good words that

(35:30):
slap you in the face that I'mthinking why, why the fuck would
you say that and would you justkeep the family and the kids
and the everybody believing andbelieving and believing and
leading everybody on and thenjust to shit, Talk about raining
on a fucking parade.

Speaker 2 (35:51):
Yeah, and it's.
It's hard to understand becauseyou're not a person like that.
Your heart is so big and soloving that you would never
purposely hurt people or deceivepeople.
So it's even harder tounderstand like I'm this way too
.
Like I, even if I was upset, Idon't think what's the first
thing I could do to fuck themover like people literally are
like that right, and it's justwhen that's your partner it's

(36:15):
like are you kidding me rightnow?
you've hurt me worse than and Ichose you, yeah than a stranger
right ever has right.
Yeah, it hurts, but but you'regetting stronger every day and
more smiles to come.
And you know it's a.
It's a.
Nobody said it was going to beeasy.
There's no fucking manual forthis.

(36:36):
No, there's not.
There's no two divorces thatare exactly the same.
No, two people are exactly thesame.
You know you have a goodsupport system and you've got.
I just think it's important toshare that.

Speaker 3 (36:51):
You can't, you can't give up, you can't Not on
yourself.
No, just make the reach.
You just got to lick the icingand eat the baby.

Speaker 2 (36:59):
Because tomorrow?
Because tomorrow it's a cake.

Speaker 3 (37:04):
The next cake is on.
You Supposed to be lucky, oh myLord.
And I'm sitting here at thewindow and I'm bawling my
eyeballs out and I'm watching myranch hand.
Two of my horses have got out.
We've got 25 miles of wind.
It's blowing all around.
Not only are my tears justflying.
I've got my bulls runningaround chasing them.

(37:26):
Oh no, I've got two horses thatare loose.

Speaker 2 (37:29):
It's going to be a wizard of Oz.
We're going to wake upsomewhere else it's real cowboy
shit.

Speaker 3 (37:38):
It is, but that's the worst cowboy ever.
God love him.
But I could walk out there andgo hey, y'all knock it off, Get
in your pen.

Speaker 2 (37:44):
What are you doing?
Why do you got to walk them, Iknow.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
Watch this.
Nick, will you give me a tissueplease?
But yeah, but.
So Today's moral is First ofall, dust off your fucking Mardi
Gras, pom poms in 2026, kel,and get your shit together.

Speaker 2 (38:02):
On it, on it, second of all, um Sometimes it does
rain on your parade.

Speaker 3 (38:08):
If you eat the baby, you just know you're going to
have to get your checkbook out.
Yeah, yeah, you can lick theicing Right.
Yeah, stick your finger in it,absolutely.
That's awkward Way to make itweird.
You know, I'm trying.
How's my makeup Still intact,is it?
Well, that's better than my.

Speaker 2 (38:28):
Those are real tears, though it well, that's better
than my, it's better than myspirit.

Speaker 3 (38:30):
Oh you, I girl, you know me real rain on the parade,
it is oh, and if you haven'theard annie wilson's song, um,
you need to, you need to.
I will put a link and share um,you will hear it on our spf 90
spotify channel tour.
I'm serious about my skincareand I'm very serious about my
music and and yes, we have anSPF 90 tour channel that on

(38:56):
Spotify that we are creating forthe tour, and she is on there
and I will be blaring it in mymotor home as me and Nick and
Axel, which is the kangaroo, andSteiner, which is the goat goat
, and Fiona, which is the lemur,that will be on tour with us,
and we will be blaring all ofthat as we cruise through 11

(39:17):
states in six weeks.

Speaker 2 (39:19):
I wish your motherfucker would pull y'all
over.

Speaker 3 (39:21):
Oh yeah, I will have my own siren.
I will throw Nick on the roofand she will be going.
Woo, I'm going to get a radio.
Going to get a radio.
Oh, I got one of those Big momcoming through.
We did, we tested it the otherday when we were running around.
Yeah, I need to make sure thatI get the horn.
My horn is not loud enough.

(39:42):
Oh yeah, that's a big.
You know me, you've got to kickthat up a notch.

Speaker 2 (39:47):
Yeah, I've got to be hitting that point.
Are you going to teach them howto drive so you can run back
and keep?

Speaker 3 (39:49):
Well, you know we were on a trip to.
Where were we going?
Baby girl Oklahoma.

Speaker 2 (39:56):
Girl, I'm scared too.

Speaker 3 (39:58):
Okay, so we were going to East Texas and we were
in Black Betty, which is myFreightliner sport chassis.
That, if you guys haven't- seenme running around in that thing
.
It's a fun rig and it's a goodtime.
It's a fun rig and it's it's agood time.
Big truck it is, and I and Ithrow a trailer or two behind
their boat or something you know?
Yeah and uh.

(40:18):
Well, uh, we were comingthrough.
Uh, oh, it was austin something.
Oh, we were in the down, okay oh, you know how I hate me some
35E and the W's and I had topiddle, and so we had Steiner
with us in Steiner's diaper bag.

(40:38):
Well, steiner wears a size 7overnighter.

Speaker 2 (40:42):
And I said look, here's the deal.

Speaker 3 (40:45):
I'm either going to and I've showed her how to put,
I've explained, like thetransmission, because it's got a
six feet Allison and you know Ilove all, the, all the, the
things and uh, so there's thebuttons, push the buttons.
Y'all know, you know, like youlike to push all the buttons.
Well, I've showed her how toput it in neutral.
This is the parking brake, whichis the big, large, loud.

(41:08):
You know that you hear in thediesel trucks and so well,
somehow I have fucked up myelbow and maybe it's because
I've been single for the last 18months to two years I don't
know, but whatever.

Speaker 2 (41:20):
Mystery is mystery, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (41:23):
But anywho, it freaking kills me to pull that
brake, and she loves it, and soI've taught her how to do that,
and so well in the middle ofthis highway deal, I said, look,
here's what's going to happen.
I'm going to, you're going tokick this thing in neutral,
you're going to pull the steeland I'm going to hop out here
and I'm going to piddle on theside of the highway.

(41:44):
Yep Of the 30 miles.
We're going to keep truckingand you're going to hand me one
of Steiner's diapers and I'mgoing to need you to hold the
steering wheel and this littlething just loses her and she's
like no.
I've had her hold the steeringwheel in the vet, which is, you
know, it's a square steeringwheel.
It's a race.
Yeah, it's got the racesteering wheel on it and nope,

(42:05):
and I'm like just don't touchthe pedals in the back, because
then you're going to startchanging gears.
So then she gets paranoidbecause there's the one of my
nuts was attached.
Yeah, the pedals in the back,because you'll start changing
gears and so yeah, this is a bigass vehicle.
There's so many cars around yeahand she did so she held on to
the wheel.
Of course, she had to literallycrawl like right where it was

(42:26):
and yep being your ride or die.

Speaker 2 (42:29):
I dropped it.
No, it's a.
You might actually die.

Speaker 3 (42:33):
Yeah, that's the thing well, I feel like there
should be a course for this,like we should have a course for
uh, yeah, yeah being my ride ordie.
Yeah, you might have to yeah,first of all, she handed the
diaper in a very nice fashion,oh, and I and I was towing a
trailer.
She was ready, because we hadto go pick up furniture too.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
Yeah, oh that's right , you were making a trip out of
it.

Speaker 3 (42:58):
We did.
We had a whole deal.
Yeah, we went.
Then Dallas, east Texas we did.
We had three big stops.

Speaker 1 (43:07):
And we, freaking, made it all in one.

Speaker 3 (43:09):
Yeah, yeah.
Well then, because I'd pullover and just pee in the trailer
.
That's what's nice about justthrowing a horse trailer on
there, because you get Bringyour own bathroom.
Yeah, you put the nice cedarshavings in there, you give them
a little spray down, uh-huh,and that's what they're for is
to absorb moisture.
Perfect, and I'm highlyallergic to cedar.

(43:32):
I go back there and every timebecause I'm once you pee, once
you gotta pee a hundred timesand I go back there and every
time I'd come back out thetrailer, my eyeballs would get
more swole and more swole and Iwas like you know I should
probably get back on my allergyshots or make sure I take my my
how?

Speaker 1 (43:47):
many of these can I take?

Speaker 3 (43:49):
Yeah, yep, so Says one, I took four Is that fine I
peed in my size sevenovernighter and we kept on
trucking we kept on trucking weweren't late to any appointments
.

Speaker 2 (44:01):
Keep on trucking.
We did Hold the wheel.

Speaker 3 (44:03):
If they say hold the wheel, Yep, and if y'all need
any training on how to trainyour nicks of your life, how to
hold the wheel and how toproperly yes, how to properly
pass the diaper.
She did so good, I was so proudyou know it was good.

Speaker 2 (44:21):
This is a random tidbit.
The other day I learned what ababy kangaroo looks like when
it's born.
I had no idea heard this onstrawberry says, it says like a
lima bean.

Speaker 1 (44:32):
It is and.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
I said this I gotta see, yeah.
And then it's like it's bornthe regular way, and then it
crawls its little self we callManzi.
Crawls its little self all theway up into the pouch, uh-huh,
hooks on a grows in there, likeI'm thinking medically, like how
is it, is it?

Speaker 3 (44:49):
like no, because that's why, when people ask me
all the time how old my rootsare, there's no telling you how
old the root are, becausethey're it's when they come out
of the pouch like a pinkyjournal, I mean like a little
gerbil like the.

Speaker 2 (45:05):
Oh yeah, I was just mind blown.
I'm like, hey, do you knowabout this?

Speaker 3 (45:08):
yeah, well, you got to kind of look up the.
I watched the the YouTube videothe opossums are kind of very
similar Really.
Yes, they're very see-through,clear.
They look like this is unlikeno shit I've ever seen.
You know how, when you'vesucked on a starburst for a
little bit and it kind of getstransparent that's what the

(45:32):
little opossums and thekangaroos look like.

Speaker 2 (45:33):
Yeah, just the fact that it's like blind and deaf
and can still find its way whereit needs to.
What if it just falls off?

Speaker 3 (45:36):
like it hooks on to like a tube.
Yeah, it's like a one-shot baby, though they don't have like
multiples, it's like that wasyour baby.
and so when they, when we haveto bottle feed them, so the
nipples are about inside, orwhen you take them out of the
pouch, if you have to take themout of the pouch, or like I had
a friend of ours that's in theexotic business and he found a

(45:57):
random roo in his pasture thatthe mom passed away, yes, and so
he had to bottle feed, and I'vehad to bottle feed several, but
the nipple is about four incheslong and it's very skinny, tiny
little two, so it can just kindof hang around in there.
Well, yeah, and so what youhave to do because you can
really fuck up a roo if youdon't know what you're doing

(46:18):
when you bottle feed them andyou have to properly let them
suck it down like spaghettinoodle, just like they do the
mama.
So you can't just like you takea nipple and you put it in a
baby's mouth.
You can't do that.
You have to letipple and youput it in a baby's mouth.
You can't do that.

Speaker 2 (46:33):
You have to let them, because if not it's going to go
in the wrong area, yeah, andthen Aspiration in the lungs, no
good for nobody.

Speaker 3 (46:37):
You know that because you're a math teacher.
Yeah, exactly, mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 (46:40):
I just was blown away .
I had no idea about that.
Possums it's the same deal.
I'm going to look it up.
It's weird.
I was like what are youwatching?
I'm like look at this this ishow tiny they are.

Speaker 3 (47:01):
Well, that's how they can tell.
If a roo is ready to come outof the pouch, be pulled out of
the pouch if they need to formedical reasons, is by the color
of the tail.
Oh, if the pink, they get darkand they know it's not ready.
Huh, yeah, it's like when youput a toothpick in the cake to
see if it pulls out.

Speaker 1 (47:17):
But you wouldn't know that you have your drop shipped
with babies in them.

Speaker 3 (47:22):
Yeah, yep, yeah fun fact, yeah.
So kangaroo factoids today,kangaroo factoids and I do want
to talk about a factoid too,before we, before we close up
all the emotional emotions thatwe've had today.
Um, I had.
You know me and my animals.

(47:42):
You and I have been bestfriends for a very, very long
time.
You've been through a shit tonof animals with me, I think from
even with the turtle being myvery first goat, which turtles
my og.
And if you want to know why Ihave a goat named turtle, it's
because I am infatuated withdark chocolate turtles and
turtles color scheme.
It looks, he looks just likehe's got the caramel he's got

(48:03):
the dark chocolate.
he's got the vanilla turtle.
Looks just like a darkchocolate turtle, so hence
that's where he got his name.
But I had Animal Control showup at this undisclosed location.
Real story, Real story.
And last week.

Speaker 2 (48:24):
Yep, like somebody got out or there was a call.
No, no.

Speaker 3 (48:28):
Anonymous.
Listen to how ironic this is.
You know I have my exoticlicense.
You know that in the state oftexas we have, and we're all
very, very close.
Well, not just in the state oftexas, but us as cameleers,
which is what you call peoplethat own camels or that are
whatever cameleers.
All of us in we're a very tightgroup.

(48:51):
Sure, um, anybody that ownsexotics, we're a very tight
group.
We all know each other, we allcommunicate.

Speaker 1 (48:57):
We all do our research.

Speaker 3 (48:59):
Yes, we camels have to have a certain type of fecals
that are taken.
It's not just your normal, yougo drop off a poop sample.
You have to have what is calleda Wisconsin modified.
There's only I have severalexotic vets Kenny Patton at
country Hills, absolute freakingrockstar.
Um.

Speaker 2 (49:18):
I've been here on shot day, yes.

Speaker 3 (49:23):
She was here doing the shots and doing all the
things, yes, and I'm very, very,very anal about all.
You know how I am.
Well, ironically enough, AnimalControl shows up at the
undisclosed location and said weheard that she had a lemur.

Speaker 2 (49:39):
Really Fiona?
Yeah, she does.

Speaker 3 (49:43):
Did y'all check the socials or what?
So, whoever?
They got an anonymous emailthat said I had a lemur.
Well, anybody that knows me,anybody that follows me, anybody
that's been at my resort,anybody that said I had a lemur.
Well, anybody that knows me,anybody that follows me, anybody
that's been at my resort,anybody that's been on my fourth
which, anybody that's been tomy house, anybody that's been
anywhere with me, knows thatthere is going to be a four
legged friend before there'sgoing to be a two legged.

(50:05):
There's no secret, any nonewhatsoever.
You know that my animals arebeyond taking care rotten word.
You have babysat them.
We have taken how many?
To the beach house.
We've taken albacore's, we'vetaken lemurs, we've taken roos,
we've taken dogs, we've takengoats and cats.
We've taken yes, we've takeneverything.

(50:26):
Yes, in ubers, we've thrown agoat in there Anything and
everything.
And so they pull up to the gateand said, yeah, there's a lemur
in here, yeah.
And so my guys were like, andwhat's the question?
But no, yeah, so what?
It doesn't live here, right?
And so they went around theplace and said said this has got

(50:56):
to be the cleanest mostwell-taken group of animals we
have ever, ever seen the bestcall we ever got seriously.
they're like this is amazing.
Well, here comes the irony ofthis whole thing, which I think
is amazing.
Born and raised local in new brBraunfels, my family owns the
Wildlife Ranch here in townwhich I mean, come on now Also
Also who, kenny Patton, takescare of Country Hills Vets.

Speaker 1 (51:20):
Exotic resources.

Speaker 3 (51:21):
Seriously, come on now.
I have six veterinarians thattake care of animals.
And if there's not one that ifwe can't find an answer, we're
going to A&M Right.
When we had, I know people yes,my gosh.
When we did the research for mykinkajous, when Riggie started
breaking out in his allergicreaction, they were at the

(51:42):
University of Florida, tennessee.

Speaker 2 (51:46):
They went to.

Speaker 3 (51:47):
This is a whole network of people that are
National zoos to reach out totry to figure out what was
causing this allergic reaction.
The officer that came up herejust so happened to be a girl
that I went to school with ourentire life.
We grew up together, rochelle,best of friends.

(52:08):
Her and I and you know me, Idon't have girlfriends Her and I
were inseparable from the timewe were in kindergarten all the
way through high school.
It just so happened to be thatthe officer that came up here
was her son, wow.
And so I get a message thatevening and she said hey,
tiffany, I just want you to knowthat that was Hunter that came

(52:30):
to your place today and he wasso excited.
These kids excited.
These turned into a field trip.
The whole family has been tothe pumpkin patch.
Yeah, they've seen, they've thepetting zoo.
They've met the animals fromwhen they were little to now
seeing them, some of them thatare larger, mocha latte still
not secrets no, and he was likemom, you should see how good the

(52:50):
cows look.
And blah, blah, blah, andRochelle said the little ones
got big yes, and she saidTiffany, oh my gosh, he was so
excited to get this call and Iwas like, well, I was glad, he
was fucking excited you shouldhave said yeah, there's a wild
lemur, See if you can catch himFor real.
Yeah, you go climb the tree tobe kidding me.

(53:16):
That's a good time.
So I decided you know, I, I asmany times that I sit and think
about how vulnerable can you beand what do you share on the
podcast and being you, as beingyou and um, I've opened up, like
I said, the door to all of myemotions, to things that I up,
like I said, the door to all ofmy emotions, to things that I I
didn't think I would ever reallywant to share, but I really.

(53:36):
Honestly, if you know me, I'mone of those that I want to
watch people prosper.
I want to help them as much as Ican If it's an animal, if it's
a person, if it's a child ifit's yes, please let it.
You feel it the same, and thefact that somebody would turn me
in for having a lemur is socute.

(53:57):
Of all the things that turn youin for, it's so cute and
adorable and I'm thinking mygosh Make mug shots Fiona has
free roam of everything andanything.
She has a 30-foot mansion of akennel.
I've seen it yeah, that shelives in that when we're not
there for real, I make herscrambled eggs.

Speaker 2 (54:22):
She eats belgian waffles, for fuck's sake and now
that you're not doing strawsanymore, she's got free reign.

Speaker 3 (54:28):
Oh my goodness seriously and I was thinking you
.
I just I wanted to share witheveryone that, if you don't know
, ask.
Yeah, don't call theauthorities, don't, don't don't
do that.

Speaker 2 (54:44):
This is the wildest animal that needs controlling
out.
Here is this.

Speaker 3 (54:49):
First of all, can we talk about the persons that are
run around on the plaza?
Okay, can we talk about, yeah,those people, the people.
Yeah, fiona has a wardrobecloset, I've seen it.
Steiner has a wardrobe closet.
Now I mean come on now, okay, Iwas just like you've got to be.

Speaker 2 (55:10):
That's how you threaten steiner, do you want to
?
See how your cousins live howyour brothers and sisters live.

Speaker 3 (55:15):
She just went to Curtis's bar in Fredericksburg
and Bubba and Courtney said youguys have got to come out here.
And they were like what's theholdup?
I said Steiner cannot pick outher skirt.
She's got three to choose from.

Speaker 2 (55:30):
Dress her and she just doesn't even give her
options me and I'm like do youwant the pink one with the
frowning just put?

Speaker 3 (55:33):
it on.
Oh my god, for real.
So yeah, so we had to go.
She had to do pictures with themardi gras purse and what have
you down there and she looks socute.
She had so much fun she had.
So much fun.
Yeah, so the top infredericksburg curt, curtis
Montalvo, great dude, shelby hiswife, amazing people.

Speaker 2 (55:53):
Yeah, absolutely, and we're going to go and do.

Speaker 3 (55:55):
But what's really cool is they've got this entire
backyard area where you can sitdown and relax your kids can go
play it's fenced in.
I can't wait.
Yeah, so you don't have toworry.
They've got games and stuff forthe kids.
They were so excited Steinerjust had a ball.
Yeah, yeah, I'm in.
I'm here for it.

(56:17):
Live music it's a great timePlan something fun Food trips.
It's a beautiful road trip,it's so good.
But yeah, um one of our ownfrom New Braunfels expanding to
watching him grow and his wifeis just a beautiful thing.
It was really really cool.

Speaker 2 (56:26):
It was fun to hear that.

Speaker 3 (56:29):
Yeah, so that's all the drama that has happened with
me here lately.

Speaker 2 (56:33):
I think that's enough for a little bit.
Yeah, I'm going to try tosqueeze in some more fun, okay.

Speaker 3 (56:37):
I mean, if you want to throw some drama at me or
something you know, I don't know, you might have to check the
calendar.

Speaker 2 (56:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (56:45):
And see if I have room for any more.

Speaker 2 (56:46):
I don't know if I, if I'm, going to have enough time.

Speaker 3 (56:48):
Oh, look here, you want to talk about the word of
the day.
You got a word of the day.
This is so perfect Because Ihad Sean Hart.
Oh yeah, so good.
Yes, about his novel that hewrote and it is extraordinary.
Got to check it out.
But it was just not the time todo the word of the day because

(57:17):
everything was so serious.

Speaker 2 (57:19):
But I think today is a very appropriate today,
appropriate to share the word ofthe day, and today the word of
the day is pooling, pooling,pooling.

Speaker 3 (57:22):
Shit talking, it is a person who speaks fluent shit
and today I feel like that isappropriate Pooling yes, okay, I
spoke a lot of fluentPooh-lingual.
Yes, okay, I spoke a lot offluent shit last week when the
ACO showed up.
And then to come to find outit's a child that I've watched
grow up and friends of familyand blah, blah, blah.

(57:44):
That way you learn, yeah, and Idon't know, and I will make
sure that we post a picture ifyou know anything about Fiona.
Fiona has a permanent fingerthat stays like this sticky uppy
one.
It's a sticky up, and so we'regonna show a picture of fiona
and her sticky uppy finger tothe person that sent yeah, we'll

(58:06):
get her um and I know you'll bethe one to find when you go
digging for your treasures.
Get her some stripy outfits.
She's going to need the blackand white one.
A little number, maybe somelittle orange slippers or
something of that kind.
Maybe some little orange Crocs.
Exactly.

Speaker 2 (58:23):
McDonald's has those in a Happy Meal.

Speaker 3 (58:25):
Can you imagine if Fiona had to have commissary
Girl?

Speaker 2 (58:28):
I can't even afford that commissary, for real.

Speaker 3 (58:31):
That's when you need to turn people in.
Fiona didn't even know what theword commissary is.
Come on now, if her raspberriesaren't plump.

Speaker 2 (58:39):
Or chilled.
They've been sitting there toolong, seriously.
We have to put them in masonjars so they stay fresh.

Speaker 3 (58:46):
They do stay fresh, and it does work If you guys do
not know, or if you don't have alemur that you're not supposed
to have, or whatever that is.

Speaker 2 (58:52):
Whatever, you have A goldfish, for that matter, at
your undisclosed location, forfuck's sake.

Speaker 3 (58:55):
I cannot with people, don't even get me started.
I know I'm sorry for thatSeriously, but put your fruit in
a mason jar.
Hey, don't let a link on thewebsite Please inquire within
Mm-hmm.

(59:15):
Yep.
The email address isfuckoffatfoyfarmcom.
Capital F.
And yeah, capital F.
It is.
Yeah, yep, so I love that foryou.
Well, I hope you eat the baby,or not swallow it, or find it.
Don't swallow it or find it, orwhatever.
Don't swallow it.
One of the things.

Speaker 2 (59:34):
I hope you get some cake.

Speaker 3 (59:37):
Hope you get to save me a piece or something.
See, some beads, I don't know.
We have a whole afternoon ofthings.
We got to go take my mom.
We finally got the frames forher pictures for Christmas, so
we're going to go swing them byher salon and go take those to
her and surprise her thisafternoon.
So maybe we'll just come andsurprise you too, sounds good.
It was so good to see you.

(59:57):
Happy Fat Tuesday.
I can't believe you didn't wipemy tears.
Look what I did to this thingall by myself.

Speaker 2 (01:00:02):
I know you're real serious about your skin care.
I don't want to like fuck it up, I know because you're rough
it's a thing.

Speaker 3 (01:00:07):
And if y'all don't know the reason why, uh, the
tour is called spf 90 tour, it'sbecause of kel, because we have
to add this in here.
Okay, the reason that it'scalled spf 90 tour is because,
yes, I am very serious about myskincare.
Learned this way too late in mylife.
Y'all, sunblock is a fuckingthing.

(01:00:28):
It is your phone sunblock.
If you're on the pewters allday, boop, put the sunblock on
there.
There's these lights of things,yes, that are shining.
That should not be shining onyou.
Anyways, put the sunblocks on,yes, so Kel and I go on.
Kel teaches me to be patientand to take time off.
Look up, and we're on theTritune and we're going to take

(01:00:55):
a little day, we're going tocruise around, we're going to
solve Warren's problems and Ikeep a bag that I take on the
boat and it stays packed all thetime, and so I have a deodorant
stick of face block and I amallergic to the mineral block.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
So I am driving and I'mscooting along and Kel, of
course y'all know she's seriousabout her music, so she's

(01:01:16):
jacking around with our soundsystem and trying to get our
music going.
And I turn around and she goeswhat in the fuck is on your face
?
And I was like what do you mean?
There's no mirrors on the boat.
I don't give a shit.

Speaker 1 (01:01:29):
And I was like I just put my sunblock on my face.

Speaker 3 (01:01:33):
She looks like a mime , so white and so she's trying
to fix it, and as she's rubbingit in, I can feel my face
melting Like she is, like it'syou know, when your mom it
wasn't coming off.
Well, when your mom licks yourfinger and does all that with
you on steroids.
But it's worse and I feel likeyou're rubbing my whole skin off
.
I'm like cal stop, I mean, I'mnot aging.

(01:01:55):
I'm not getting any younger Imean, yeah, I am aging by the
minute and I was like, oh my god, I've just got so many wrinkles
.

Speaker 2 (01:02:02):
You had to put some vodka on the rag.

Speaker 3 (01:02:03):
That was a different trip that was no, that was when
we were on the island and we didthe same thing.
Same shit happens, differentboat different location.
We had Nikki with us and samedeal.
I'm downstairs, the girls comewalking down the stairs, I'm
taking them out on the boat,we're going to go fishing, and
and yep and she.

(01:02:24):
I turn around and once againshe was like what in the fuck?
You have this shit here too.

Speaker 2 (01:02:29):
How serious is this shit here too.
How serious is down here?

Speaker 3 (01:02:31):
we haven't been here in a year and I was like,
clearly my sunblocks old, so Ionce again I look like a fucking
idiot that got in a fight withzinc oxide.
You were very serious, yeah,and so we're driving anybody
gonna fuck with that?
girl.
We're going to baffin bay,which is 75 miles out, and my
hair is slapping on my face andit is stuck, so now I look like

(01:02:51):
I got in a fight with the worstspider web.
I couldn't get it off and allwe had was um Nikki's cucumber,
melon vodka and so we put mywhite piece in my toolbox were
dried, and so I saturated adried white white bead with
vodka and continued to, uh, tryto remove the spackle, the yes

(01:03:14):
off my face and then put on someregular sunblock, that.
But anywho, that was a good time, that is, and so the joke
continued on as we uh talkedabout our prom that we had that
we will be redoing every year.
And first annual.
We did our first annual promand then our SPF 90 tour and

(01:03:37):
that's where it all stimulatedfrom is from me and my Facebook.
Do you want sticks?
Real stories, yes and so, and Iclearly don't look or care to
rub it in or whatever, clearlyit wasn't clear.
Look, I don't want any more sunspots.
Okay so, but yeah, SPF 90.

(01:04:02):
Spf 90 tour yeah, coming soon.
Stay tuned for that.
Yeah, yeah.
So I'm so glad you're here.

Speaker 2 (01:04:09):
Thanks for having me.
I love you.

Speaker 3 (01:04:11):
What a treat, love you and and um, we're gonna book
you some flights so you cancome in and out and you
definitely got to get the uhlouisiana hit with us.

Speaker 2 (01:04:21):
Oh yeah, sure, a thousand percent yeah or you.

Speaker 3 (01:04:23):
Just we should probably just stick kelly on the
bus and then just fly her outwhenever you're ready, here we
go.
We got points.
Okay, you know she's gonna tryto give me the drive well, I
love you, love you cut I put ablessing on it.

Speaker 1 (01:04:43):
See me dripping in it 24 7 on it.
I'm just being honest.
Holy water dripping, drippingfrom my neck to my crap.
Song q stepping on it.