ChatGPT Dating Advice, the 'Talking Stage', and Blocking Exes with Hokulani

Send us a text

Ever wondered what it's like to be a professional Tahitian dancer who's also navigating the modern dating scene? Hokulani joins Chris on the REALationship Method podcast for her first-ever podcast interview, pulling back the curtain on her life beyond the dance performances you see on social media.

Born into a family of Polynesian dancers, Hokulani began competing at just six years old and has since transformed her passion into a thriving content creation career. She candidly shares how she monetizes her cultural performances through TikTok while maintaining respect for her Polynesian heritage—a delicate balance that influences everything from her content choices to her dating life.

The conversation takes a fascinating turn when Hokulani reveals her unconventional relationship counselor: ChatGPT! She explains how AI has helped her navigate dating dilemmas when she wasn't ready to speak with friends or family. This leads to a deeper discussion about modern dating customs, with Hokulani asserting that the "talking stage" should last no longer than 3-4 months before becoming official—a timeline that seems increasingly rare in today's dating landscape.

Perhaps most revealing is Hokulani's philosophy on ending relationships: "blocking on social media = out of sight, out of mind." She explains why she believes clean breaks are necessary and how living in Las Vegas while her family returned to Hawaii has shaped her independence. The episode concludes with Hokulani sharing details about a promising new connection and her plans to return to Hawaii within the year.

Whether you're interested in the intersection of cultural identity and modern relationships, curious about content creation as a career path, or simply enjoy authentic conversations about dating in the digital age, this episode offers refreshing insights from someone straddling traditional values and contemporary life.

• Hokulani shares her journey as a Tahitian dancer, competing since age six and eventually transforming her passion into a content creation career
• Discussion of how content creation became Hokulani's primary source of income through TikTok monetization and TikTok Shop
• Exploration of texting behaviors in relationships and how Hokulani uses ChatGPT as an unconventional therapist for relationship advice
• Hokulani reveals her perspective that the "talking stage" should last no more than 3-4 months before becoming official
• Conversation about dating expectations, including chivalry and the importance of opening car doors
• Debate on whether dating multiple people while single makes someone a "player" or is actually healthy exploration
• Hokulani explains her philosophy on blocking exes: "out of sight, out of mind"
• Discussion about Hokulani's plans to move back to Hawaii from Las Vegas within the next year
• Analysis of how being a content creator affects dating life and why some men find social media status intimidating

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:07):
5, 4, 3, 2, 1,.
Welcome back to another episodeof the Relationship Method
podcast.
It's your boy, chris, and todayI have Tahitian dancer,
tahitian instructor, tahitiancompetitor man.
I have your girl, hokul, onthis motherfucking pod.
Yay Hokulani, thank you forcoming on today Of course.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Thank you for having me oh my gosh.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
I acknowledge your thankfulness.

Speaker 2 (00:38):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (00:39):
Yeah, okay, yeah, whatever.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
I'm very grateful.
This is such an amazingopportunity.
Oh my gosh, Same here.

Speaker 1 (00:43):
I'm very grateful.
This is such an amazingopportunity oh my gosh, same
here Before we get this going.
Ma'am, how did I get the yesfrom you to come on this little
pod?

Speaker 2 (00:55):
Well, you got the yes one because it is my very first
podcast.
It is the first time eversomebody has asked me.

Speaker 1 (01:03):
Shut your ass up, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
We'll get into that yeah.
So I'm very grateful and I feellike on social media, nobody
ever hears me talk or knows mystory.
They just see me dance all thetime.
You know, dancing does tell astory, however, but I feel like
nobody gets to know the real me,so I feel like this is a good
opportunity to let people know.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
Man girl.
Hell yeah Shit.
I just got a brain fart whenyou say this is your first pod.
Poppin' Cherries would want tohear your story or hear you

(01:48):
speak on certain types of thingsand discussions and stuff.

Speaker 2 (01:53):
That's surprising to me, yeah.
Holy crap, I'm actually reallysurprised too.

Speaker 1 (01:59):
Okay, well, we'll get into your story then.
How did you, Hokulani get intodancing then?

Speaker 2 (02:03):
Okay, so both of my parents were both Polynesian
dancers as well.
They were in the entertainmentindustry, so they danced in
luwows and also were in a halau.
So I grew up into it, but Istarted competing when I was six
years old, so I've been acompetitor ever since.
So I'm always hungry, alwaysneeding more.

(02:24):
So yeah, it was my parents whobrought me into it.
I was kind of voluntold growingup.
I hate that shit, but hey yeah,so I was forced into it.
I didn't actually start likingit until I was probably like
eight or ten, yeah so, um,you're hungry.

Speaker 1 (02:44):
Uh, chili's you kind of messed up today.
Um, uh, six years old, mylittle one, she goes to, I guess
.
Um, there's a place, uh,there's a, there's a class in
crock center and she's takinghula right now my mom teaches
there right now shut your ass up.
Um god, I don't know her namebecause my wife usually takes

(03:05):
her, but you know she's, youknow, cute wearing the purple
shirts and shit.
But um yeah, so you competedfor that place, or did you have
to join a different?
What you say halal.
So for people that don't knowwhat a halal is, what is a halal
?

Speaker 2 (03:19):
halal is a a group, so in tajuan it's called a pupu
ori, in hula it's called a halau.
So it's just basically a dancegroup okay, okay, okay.

Speaker 1 (03:31):
And did you dance for um the croc center or did you
go somewhere else?

Speaker 2 (03:35):
I've always danced with the group to wakanui and
they're based in las vegas.
Oh so growing up I was justdancing with my mom and my dad,
but but I officially joined agroup when I was six.

Speaker 1 (03:47):
Officially joined a group at six, and then did you
have to fly to Las Vegas, orwere they here on the island
already?

Speaker 2 (03:52):
It was in Las Vegas, so it was after we moved.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
Oh yeah, and then what made you move?
Or was it like a family thing?

Speaker 2 (04:00):
It was a family thing .
Yeah, Okay.

Speaker 1 (04:02):
And then you and I talked prior, you decided to
stay in Vegas, and then theycame home, or how did that
situation work out?

Speaker 2 (04:10):
Yeah, so my mom got a job opportunity out here in
Oahu to work for SouthwestAirlines.

Speaker 1 (04:16):
Oh, go ahead, auntie.

Speaker 2 (04:17):
Yes, so she decided to move back, and then my dad
decided to move back, and thenmy siblings all decided to move
back.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
Leaving you there.

Speaker 2 (04:26):
Leaving me lonely and stranded.

Speaker 1 (04:28):
Girl, when did they move out?
And then, how old were you whenthis whole transition happened?

Speaker 2 (04:34):
I was 20 or 21.
So I was already out of thehouse, so it wasn't that big of
a jump you know.
So I was already living on myown, so it was pretty easy.

Speaker 1 (04:44):
Ooh and then did you go to high school out there in
Vegas too, or did you?

Speaker 2 (04:48):
really yeah, I went to Desert Oasis.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
I've heard of that school before.
Hey, las Vegas, you got a localhere, you know that, so there,
and then did you go to collegeor anything.

Speaker 2 (04:59):
No, I didn't.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
Yeah, school's for suckers anyway.
You don't need it, honestly,ooh, okay, okay.
And then, of course, me and herwe talk.
You know off-air, offline andeverything.
You're into this, you knowcontent creating and you're
making I'm not saying majorbucks, but that's your primary
source of income.
So tell me about that how doeslike being a Tahitian instructor

(05:27):
, competitor and dancer how does, how did you, how did that
become like your whole primary,primary, primarily source of
income?
Like, how did that happen?

Speaker 2 (05:31):
okay, so I started TikTok back in 2020 when COVID
happened, but I wasn't makingany money on there, so I was a
server and a bottle girl in LasVegas.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
Hey, I think every female, almost every female that
lived in Vegas had toexperience that type of life.
You have to.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
So I was doing that for a couple of years, and then
it was 2023, when the season wasover.

Speaker 1 (05:56):
So I was only doing it.
There's seasons for bottleservice, yeah, so I was doing it
at a day club.

Speaker 2 (06:01):
So the summer was over, Huh yeah.
So it was around August timeand then I'm like, oh, what do I
want to do with my life?
Do I want to get anotherserving job?
You know?
But I was just so over theindustry so I was like, you know
, maybe let me take contentcreating a little more seriously
.

Speaker 1 (06:17):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
So I went full force into it, started posting.
So you make a couple dollarsoff of each thousand view so I
just kept posting every singleday.
I posted like three times a dayand this is on tiktok.
This is on tiktok, okay andthen I finally, um, got
monetized.
It's what it's when you hit a10 000 followers.
So that's when I just startedposting, posting, posting, and

(06:41):
then I got a lot of views and Iwas just like okay, I think I
could do this and that's when.

Speaker 1 (06:48):
So your content, was it you?
Uh, what was your content likeback in the day?

Speaker 2 (06:52):
so back in 2023 it was all dancing content, uh-huh.
And then they opened this newthing called tiktok shop.
I don't know if you've everheard of it Never heard of that.
Yeah, so it's basically likeAmazon, but on TikTok, uh-huh,
and you just promote it and youget a commission.

Speaker 1 (07:09):
Yeah, what Not?

Speaker 2 (07:11):
only am I getting paid for my views, but I'm also
getting paid to promote products.

Speaker 1 (07:17):
Really Uh-huh.
All right, this might be a sidenote.
How does it work that once ayear thing when you have to do
your taxes and everything?

Speaker 2 (07:23):
how does it work?

Speaker 1 (07:24):
yeah, how does that work?
Is it the same where, like you,claim your own business?
Am I right?
Yeah and then um, how do youpay back?
Because yeah tax is gettingtaken out.
They don't take it out so youhave to save okay, see, there it
is.

Speaker 2 (07:40):
That's what I think, that's what I'll get into, so
that's the the sucky part aboutbeing a content creator, so you
do have to have like a taxperson, like if you can't manage
it on your own.
Yeah, so yeah.
But the good thing is, a lot ofthings get written off, like my
camera, my phone, my wi-fi,because I use all that stuff,
you know true?

Speaker 1 (08:00):
so yeah does, does your car get written off as well
?
If you have like a sticker onit, does it get written off?

Speaker 2 (08:05):
So I actually don't drive anymore.
I haven't driven in over a year.

Speaker 1 (08:10):
Really.
So how are you getting aroundVegas Uber?

Speaker 2 (08:12):
Uber everywhere.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
Uber everywhere?
Yeah, okay, do you have adriver's license at least?

Speaker 2 (08:19):
I do so.
I got into a car accident lastyear after practice and I've
been traumatized ever since.

Speaker 1 (08:26):
Really Mm-hmm.
So that trauma.
Did you have to go see a thai-,a thai-, a therapist for that?

Speaker 2 (08:37):
No, I was actually supposed to go see a
psychiatrist.

Speaker 1 (08:39):
Psychiatrist.

Speaker 2 (08:40):
okay, but I don't know, I was just always too
nervous psychiatrist?

Speaker 1 (08:47):
okay, I don't know, I was just always too nervous.
Are you, um, like me back inthe day?
Are you one of those peoplewhere it's like, man, I could
fix myself.
I don't need an, a third or athird person outside like
analyzing me and shit yes, sofunny you brought that up.

Speaker 2 (08:59):
I've been using chat gbt as a therapist okay, wait,
oh okay.

Speaker 1 (09:03):
So what would you ask ?
We're gonna get down to thisone.
How?
What did you ask chat gbt?
And then what did they answer?
Like what did it answer you?

Speaker 2 (09:12):
I'm.
I just asked it like how can Iget over my fear of driving?
Okay yeah, and then it'll justlike give me a whole list of
things to do.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
Obviously, it doesn't really help is it generic, or
are you like, oh shit, this islike kind of heartfelt yeah, it
is pretty generic oh, prettygeneric, yeah, okay but I do
like to use it for like morerelationship stuff shut up for
real.
It helped, did it work?
Yes, really, it really helpedme.

Speaker 2 (09:38):
One, give me one example like when I asked it,
okay, so there was this one boythat I was talking to, but he
would never text me, but I couldtell that there was like a vibe
together, you know, and I wasjust asking Chow JBT.
I was like okay, does this boylike me?
Like I can't tell if he's nottexting me.

Speaker 1 (09:57):
That was it.
Just does this boy like me?

Speaker 2 (09:59):
Well, obviously they asked like, oh, give me more of
your guys' story together.
And so I did, and they're like,yeah, he doesn't like you.

Speaker 1 (10:10):
So did you ever ask the boy if he did like you, or
you just went off of chat, gpt.

Speaker 2 (10:15):
I just went off of chat GPT.
Oh my God.

Speaker 1 (10:18):
You probably caught an L on this one.

Speaker 2 (10:21):
I was like you know what chat GPT?
You're right.

Speaker 1 (10:23):
Oh, no way.
That's so funny Because I useChatGPT on like captions and
everything.
I've never done it to whereyou're like for that like advice
.

Speaker 2 (10:33):
No, yeah.
So there's like a little voicebutton that you could click and
it's literally someone talkingto you and it answers right away
.

Speaker 1 (10:43):
Can you choose the voice?
Yes, what's your voice?
Um, what's your voice?

Speaker 2 (10:48):
uh, default so you could choose like a, like a
empathetic person or a strictperson.
I choose the morestraightforward person.
I want you to tell me how it isokay, yeah, and then.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
Uh, do you get to choose the accent like an
englishman or someone fromNigeria?

Speaker 2 (11:05):
Shut up.
I chose to listen from a man'sperspective.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
Would that ease you a little bit more than a woman's
it?

Speaker 2 (11:12):
helps me because obviously I have girlfriends and
I ask them for advice.

Speaker 1 (11:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:16):
You know how it is Like yeah we listen, but I'd
rather hear it from the man'sperspective.
You know, just because I don'tknow, as a woman I feel like we
talk out of emotion a lot.

Speaker 1 (11:27):
And not perspective in the brain.
Do you have guy friends outthere in Vegas or any close ones
?
Yeah, could you bring theseissues to them, or will they
give you some sort of genericanswer as well?

Speaker 2 (11:40):
You know, sometimes it's hard being a girl and
having guy friends, because youdon't know if they're giving you
this advice because they'rebeing straight up or because
they like you.
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 (11:49):
You know, like you as in, like you, like you as in,
like you, mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 (11:53):
So I'm just like, okay, are you telling me to
leave him because you want me,or are you telling me to leave
him because he's actually notgood for me?

Speaker 1 (11:59):
Oh yeah, I think you need one of those, um, I guess
one of those friends, those guyfriends, because I'm one of them
too.
That's just, I ain't got notime for girls.
I'm all about me right now.
If you come along, cool, butright now I'll give you the nate
grit straight up yeah you know,yeah, oh my gosh, I had a
question, but oh fuck, I fuckingforgot it, goddamn.

(12:20):
Um, uh, okay, guys, how do Doyou have like a sixth sense on
if guys are liking you or not?
You?

Speaker 2 (12:30):
could tell, you could tell, huh.

Speaker 1 (12:32):
You could tell yeah.
So if a guy likes you andyou're not interested, what is
your telltale sign?
Or like what do you do to letthe person know, like I'm not
interested, I just see you moreof a friend.
We can hang out as friends, butnothing more.

Speaker 2 (12:45):
I just tell them straight up, as it is, okay,
yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:48):
And does that end well with you, or does?
The guy is like my heart'sbroken.
I don't know what to do.

Speaker 2 (12:58):
So I'm very known for blocking.

Speaker 1 (13:02):
Mm okay.

Speaker 2 (13:03):
So I just block, so they don't even have a chance to
see me.
You know, I don't have a chanceto see them after we finish
talking.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
Blocking on social media or blocking in your phone
as well.

Speaker 2 (13:17):
Social media.

Speaker 1 (13:18):
But on your phone he's still there.

Speaker 2 (13:20):
He's still there.
He can message me if he wantsto, but I'm not going to respond
.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
But he's your there.
Oh yeah, he can message me ifhe wants to, but I'm not gonna
respond.
But he's your friend, he's afriend.
So when, what, what text willmake you respond back?
Because I know a lot of guysout there are like they might be
in the same situation where hefinally told one of his
girlfriends like yo, I kind oflike you, and then she's like oh
, kind of weirded out, maybeblocked him and he's texting,
she's not responding.
So what's the breaking textwhere it's like, oh snap, hi,

(13:54):
how you doing, or is it abirthday?
Could it be a birthday orchristmas text?

Speaker 2 (13:58):
anything, I'm just no , I'm not responding to nothing,
no contact nothing.
No contact.

Speaker 1 (14:04):
So you block him.
So if you block him on socialmedia, can you see his stuff?
Or is it just you don't see hisstuff?
He doesn't see your stuff.

Speaker 2 (14:12):
Out of sight, out of mind, on both ends.

Speaker 1 (14:14):
Really.
So why do you keep his numberin the phone then, if you
blocked him on social media?
It's because it's there, youknow oh okay, someone taught me
that the people that you don'ttalk to anymore on your phone,
instead of having their name,you put like an emoji of like,
let's say, a skull or like atombstone right and then, yeah,

(14:35):
so if they ever text, it's likewho is this?
Because you know you might noteven know the number by heart
wait, I actually did this didreally.
How did that pan out?

Speaker 2 (14:45):
um why I put a tombstone yeah it's because, uh,
he ghosted me on valentine'sday shut up.

Speaker 1 (14:53):
So how did you feel about that?

Speaker 2 (14:55):
like when you, when you, when you're the ghost,
start ghosty yeah, it was veryweird for me, because I never
really get ghosted uh-huh so,yeah it.
It was Valentine's Day and wewere supposed to go to dinner,
and then he never messaged methe whole entire day.

Speaker 1 (15:08):
Wait after dinner or before.

Speaker 2 (15:10):
The whole day.

Speaker 1 (15:11):
No way, but you were supposed to go to dinner.
Yeah, we were.
What did you do?

Speaker 2 (15:15):
What did I do?

Speaker 1 (15:17):
For Valentine's, for him to not communicate with you.
What did you do?
Looking back?
Let's break it down.
Communicate with you.
What did you do?
Looking back, like let's, let'sbreak it down.
Looking back, what did hokalanido throughout that day?
To where it's like dude, I'mnot gonna text her like this no,
okay, so oh, she did dosomething okay okay.

Speaker 2 (15:35):
So, uh, he actually messaged me the next day, the
following day okay and he saidoh hey, I don't want to actually
ghost you, but these are thereasons why I don't want to
pursue this.

Speaker 1 (15:45):
Were they valid.

Speaker 2 (15:46):
Yeah, they were.

Speaker 1 (15:47):
Oh, okay, yeah.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
So I did have an ex that I had around, you know,
because he was a friend, youknow like yeah, okay, okay, okay
, An ex that was around, okay,yeah, and he just didn't like
that, and I get it, you know.
Yeah, and he just didn't likethat, and I get it, you know.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:05):
I wouldn't want to be with someone who's still
hanging out with their ex, so itwas valid.

Speaker 1 (16:10):
Your ex?
Were you guys friends beforeyou got together?

Speaker 2 (16:14):
So my ex was actually my personal trainer.
So yeah, before we starteddating.

Speaker 1 (16:22):
You had a friendship there, so it wasn't like a high
school sweetheart or whatever,it was just a.

Speaker 2 (16:26):
Yeah no, he came up to me at the gym.
I was like hey, do you wantsome personal training?

Speaker 1 (16:30):
I'm like sure, Personal training Nudge, nudge,
wink, wink.

Speaker 2 (16:35):
It got pretty personal.

Speaker 1 (16:37):
So the so the reasons are valid, yeah, and did you
like, like, did it left you likethinking, like, damn, that kind
of, did that kind of hurt yourego, or like did it kind of like
hurt you in some way because ithappened?

Speaker 2 (16:53):
Yeah, it definitely opened my eyes.
Yeah, there you go, I was justlike dang, I really do need to
cut off my ex.
You know, if I want to findsomeone new, you know, obviously
I can't have my ex stringingalong, so right after that I did
cut him off.

Speaker 1 (17:06):
As in blocked him.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
Wait who my ex?

Speaker 1 (17:09):
The ex.

Speaker 2 (17:12):
Yeah, you blocked him , blocked on everything, even
phone number, and deleted hisphone number.

Speaker 1 (17:15):
Really Did he try getting you like texting you
back?

Speaker 2 (17:18):
I don't know, because I blocked him.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
So the whole thing of blocking right, if let's say
the person gets a new phone,same number, tries calling you,
does that show up on your phone,like when you block him?
Does it show up on your phoneor does it just go straight to
voicemail with the phone numberin your missed call section?

Speaker 2 (17:36):
It goes straight to voicemail.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
And you'll never see it.
Yeah, wow.

Speaker 2 (17:40):
There is a little column in your voicemails.
If you scroll all the way downyou can see blocked voicemails.
So if he did were to send one,I could hear it.

Speaker 1 (17:49):
But who does ever check that box, right?
Yeah, I mean, I check it hereand there.
Wow, that's amazing.
Yeah, dude, I don't think, man,I'm trying to think when I
blocked someone, or if I werethe blocky.
I don't think I've ever.
Maybe I think I was the blocky,I don't know, because I would

(18:10):
contact someone and then theywould never respond.
So I guess I was the blocky,right?

Speaker 2 (18:14):
It does not deliver.

Speaker 1 (18:15):
No, it delivers, it goes through, but it's just I
don't get to respond back.

Speaker 2 (18:21):
So I think I was the blocky or I just got ghosted?
Yeah, you were probably justghosted, probably.

Speaker 1 (18:23):
And then with the whole calling no, I would ring
and go to voicemail, yeah, butif I was blocked it would go
straight to voicemail.
Mm-hmm, yeah, I didn't getblocked on the phone part, Hmm.
But then when I feel that typeof way I'd be going through my
feels yeah, like I'd be goingthrough my feels.
Yeah, like I'll be like dude,like I want I want everyone to

(18:45):
like me and everything, yeah.
And then when someone doesn't,I try to go out of my way, be
like dude, what did I do to youfor you not to like me?
I'm just like shit.
Does that happen to you too?
Yeah, where you just get intolike dude, what?
Why doesn't she like me?
Why?
Why is he like a dick to me?
Like, what did I do wrong?

Speaker 2 (19:01):
yeah, I'm a people, pleaser, you know, I think a lot
of people yeah, yeah, to anextent, yeah, okay so when
someone like actually doesn'tlike me, I like look at myself
and I question.
I'm like, what is there not tolike?
You know, not in like a highmakamaka way, but like what did
I do to you?

Speaker 1 (19:19):
you know.

Speaker 2 (19:20):
So whenever that does happen, I I like to just think
like, ok, did I say something ordid I do something in order to
trigger them?
Yeah, and you know, sometimes Ido have to take accountability,
like there are little thingsthat could bother someone, that
I don't even notice, so, butit's always important to
communicate.

Speaker 1 (19:41):
Oh my gosh, On this podcast we talk about
communication a lot and I'm I'mgetting sick and tired of
hearing it, but I mean it'svalid.
No, it is, it is, and there'slike certain ways to communicate
.
You could be like super bluntabout it or you could you have
to, I guess, give them a likegive it a pillow, you know, to

(20:04):
say to where, um, the message is.
The message is there, but in ina way where the person is like
okay, I don't feel attacked.
Yeah, because I think peoplefeel attacked when you're
communicating.
But you're like being straightup?
Yeah, are you a straight upperson like do you want the
message come across across toyou?
Like girl, poor Hemplo, and youknow her breath doesn't stink,

(20:27):
but if it's like you should kindof stink right now, you need
some gum.
Or would it be like you want abreath in?

Speaker 2 (20:36):
I feel like either way I get the message.

Speaker 1 (20:38):
Yeah, so either way, I mean which way would you be
like what the fuck?
Or all right, cool, cool, coolcool, I get it, I get it.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, the first one, I would definitely be like the
fuck yeah.
But when it comes to conflict,I do like to be more
straightforward.
And I would want the person tobe more straightforward with me.
So there are times when becauseobviously we're in a dance
group and we're surrounded bygirls and hormones- oh my gosh

(21:07):
Attitudes.
In a dance group and we'resurrounded by girls and hormones
oh my gosh attitudes.
Uh, I love you guys, but, um,yeah, there are times where
there are situations where Ihave to nip it in the butt
because, like, there are timeswhere I would just hold this
judgment on this certain personor this, a certain resentment
against them because they didsomething to me, you know.
But I think it's the best thingto do is to communicate.

(21:30):
I pull them to the side and belike hey, sis, I didn't like
that.
You did this to me, you know,uh-huh, and I feel like it's
better received that way, youknow oh no, that's facts.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Um, I remember when I was dancing in a dance crew
back in california.
Uh, you know, when we, when wewould block, and then when would
people, when people would putin their suggestions on how we
would block or how would we, uh,like, make it more eye
appealing, and um, and as achoreographer, you'd be like,
hey, man, shut up, this is myshit, you know.
Or yeah, or you'd be like, hey,man, shut up, this is my shit,
you know.
Or you'd be like, hey, becauseyou would say it.

(22:04):
Well, me personally, I would.
I'm the type of person that Iwould say it in front of
everyone and I'd just be likehey, what do you guys think?
Da-da-da-da-da.
So I think, yeah, side to the,to the side, it's less, I guess
it's less attacked on them,because and they wouldn't feel
that pressure with everyone likelooking and be like, oh shit,

(22:24):
what is he?

Speaker 2 (22:24):
gonna say next yeah, yeah, definitely not in front of
like the whole class, oh yeahdefinitely when you're teaching
class.

Speaker 1 (22:29):
Is it a?
Is it a five, six, seven, eighttype of deal, or do you go like
, like, how do you when you'rechoreographing these things and
blocking them?
Is it the 5, 6, 7, 8?
Or is it the dun-dun-dun?

Speaker 2 (22:42):
It is a 5, 6, 7, 8.
And then I also do a drum withmy mouth.

Speaker 1 (22:46):
Give me an example.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
Like.

Speaker 1 (22:52):
Okay, I feel that because when I used to teach it
was like 5, 6, 7, 8.
Andack, tiki, tiki, clack, boomyeah I do that.
Yeah, it's like a hip-hop thing,yeah, and goes, woo, it didn't.
Yeah, yeah, that's how I usedto teach because, um, I never
had formal dance training, Ijust learned off university,
youtube, right.
So everything was, um, theywould do like this is one like

(23:14):
five, six, seven, eight, one eand a two e and a clicky three,
four, five, whatever.
I'm just whatever.
I'm just like, oh fuck this,click, click, boom, boom, click,
click, boom.
You know so, oh, my God, whenyou're choreographing these
things, right, and you havethese females there, do you have
any male dancers there?
Has there ever been like staticand you don't have to drop
names?
But male dancers and femaledancers, you ever see them, like

(23:37):
you know, canoodle or minglewith each other?

Speaker 2 (23:40):
So that's so funny that you bring that up, because
most of our boys that we haveare brought in because of the
girls, because they're likethat's their boyfriend oh.
Yeah, so we don't have anybodywho like seen each other in
class and like each other youknow, yeah, Not as of lately,
but like back in the in a day.

Speaker 1 (23:58):
yeah, we used to could you tell that there was
drama going on when, whenthere's practice and you're like
oh, they're fighting.

Speaker 2 (24:05):
Stand guy.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
No, yeah, literally really feel the vibe uh,
professional, were theyprofessional about it or yeah,
could?
You tell like man, we hey,y'all need to just stop right
now.

Speaker 2 (24:16):
No, yeah, because we know them.
Obviously we could feel thevibe.
But they would still justpractice and keep it
professional.

Speaker 1 (24:23):
Oh my gosh, I remember because I was mingling
with a woman she's my wife nowbut when we would dance together
and when we would have ourspats, I would just stay on one
side of the room, I would do thechoreo and everything, but I
wouldn't talk.
I'm just like just rolling myeyes and everything.

(24:46):
And then, you know, when itcomes to formations and I have
to stand next to her, I'm justlike I'm trying to touch.
You know, I ain't trying totouch her, whatever, but I mean
people can feel the vibe andit's what's that word?
It's not, the word's not it'snot unselling, but it's a fuck.
You know what it's, just youjust don't want to be around it.

(25:07):
Yeah, girl, let's get to thesequestions, and we already, nate.
We already did some of these.
Okay, here's a good one how tohandle the next step in our
relationship.
Conversation, like, how do youhandle what's the next step in
our relationship?

Speaker 2 (25:24):
Like from talking to becoming in a relationship.

Speaker 1 (25:29):
Yeah, we could talk about that and also like if
you're in the relationship andlike, oh, what's next for us?
Yeah, that conversation afterthat.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
So when you're in a talking stage, Talking stage
yeah, I don't know.
I feel like the most months youshould be in a talking stage is
probably like three to fourmonths three to four months of
talking.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
And what does this talking consist of?

Speaker 2 (25:50):
just like texting, seeing each other here and there
, and then the boy should belike okay, will, will you be my
girlfriend?
But I feel like nowadays nobodydoes that.

Speaker 1 (25:59):
They don't.

Speaker 2 (26:00):
And I'm just like why .

Speaker 1 (26:04):
Do you think it's because guys are one social
media right?
Yeah, two, I think now they'rea little too proud to ask.
They want the woman to ask likewould you be my man to ask.
They want the woman to ask like, would you be my man, you know,
I think?
I think those are like the twomain reasons why guys aren't

(26:26):
like hey would you be my girl?

Speaker 2 (26:26):
I feel like the roles are like reversing and it's so
sad it is.

Speaker 1 (26:30):
It is because I asked you know, like when it was me,
it would be me asking like hey,would you be my girl?
Like where are we going withthis?
Are you my girl, or like, andif I'm not asking the question,
it's like you're my girl now,right?

Speaker 2 (26:45):
yeah, right, yeah, I think it's just more proper to
ask you know, just not assume,you know oh, facts yeah during
the talking stages.

Speaker 1 (26:53):
is there, um, could the man or the woman, could they
like overdo it?
Is there a way that they canand be like, like, let's say,
you say the texting right, couldthey over?
Or the woman, could they likeoverdo it?
Is there a way that they canand be like, oh Like, let's say,
you say the texting right,could they overdo the text?

Speaker 2 (27:05):
Oh, like texting constantly Like to where they
can't breathe.
Yes, yeah, yeah, Because, like,this is the time where you're
still like getting to know theperson You're not boyfriend and
girlfriend.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
So some people expect to text like all the time.
But I don't know for me, I'mreally bad at texting.
So are you as in like you havea 24 hour time limit text, or
like you'll see it and you'relike, okay, I'll text you back
when I'm done doing this, andthen you just totally forget yes
, yes, and I respond in my head.
I'm like oh my gosh, I forgot torespond uh, so are you
apologetic when you text backlike dude?
I'm so sorry, I thought I didtext you, but no man, I ain't

(27:41):
doing nothing today.

Speaker 2 (27:42):
No, yeah, I am very apologetic on it, but it could
be annoying from, like, theguy's perspective.
You know, it may seem like I'mnot interested, but I'm actually
just super busy.

Speaker 1 (27:53):
Do you prefer a call or a FaceTime?

Speaker 2 (27:55):
Yes, a call.

Speaker 1 (27:56):
I'm a call FaceTime person too, usually more
FaceTime because I'm just likemotherfucker, you're lying, you
ain't here, let me see.
But I like calling because Icould tell like if.
I'm like say if, becauseusually I try to stay on the
phone for like a minute so Icould just get my point across.
But if I'm, if I know in myhead that it might be like a two

(28:17):
, three minute conversation andit's like I could hear the tone
if the person's like in it, youknow, like with it or not.

Speaker 2 (28:24):
So yeah, yeah, Because when you're texting
someone, you could definitelymisread it.

Speaker 1 (28:29):
Uh-huh.

Speaker 2 (28:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:30):
Like you could.
An okay could be like okay or aokay yeah, you never know
Definitely.
And then so still in thetalking stages.
How about the meetups?

Speaker 2 (28:39):
The meetups.

Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yeah, like when you're seeing each other.

Speaker 2 (28:41):
Going out on dates.

Speaker 1 (28:42):
Yeah, could you overdo that dating part?

Speaker 2 (28:46):
Yeah, yeah, I feel like you can.
I feel like this is the timewhere you want to Impress the
girl, you know, but not liketreat her like your girlfriend.

Speaker 1 (28:56):
How does one From a female's point of view, how does
one do that like, uh, I guess,treat you well, take you out,
but not you're.

Speaker 2 (29:06):
Hey, you ain't my girl yet yeah, this is so crazy
that we're talking about this.
Why?
Because something just recentlyhappened.
Yeah, just a couple weeks ago.
This is so t it's not my faultthat my body and everyone wants
it so, yeah, so a couple weeksago I actually had this boy I

(29:30):
was in a long distance talkingrelationship with, and then he
came to vegas to visit me andtalking, talking about it.
Now, like my perspective haschanged, but in the moment I
just wanted him to treat me likea girlfriend, you know.

Speaker 1 (29:46):
But you guys were in the talking stage.

Speaker 2 (29:48):
We were just in the talking stage.

Speaker 1 (29:49):
Okay, so nothing official.

Speaker 2 (29:51):
So nothing official.

Speaker 1 (29:52):
Got you okay.

Speaker 2 (29:53):
I was just expecting like the world out of it, you
know, yeah.
But now that I'm on the otherside and I see from his
perspectives to why he didn't docertain things, I'm just like,
oh dang, I did overdo it.

Speaker 1 (30:07):
What was the things that you expected him to do Like
?
So the things that alreadyshould have been done is this
whole chivalrous thing Openingthe doors, pulling your seat,
paying, you know, at leastpaying 65% of the dinner.
You know, like it's like aboutthe opening the door.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
OK, so when he first came to see me, we were going to
go to the gym together.
Ok so he came to pick me up andI was expecting this grand
thing where we're going to runinto each other's arms and hug
each other or he's actually, orhe'll actually go to my door,
you know.
But he just texted me here andexpected me to walk to the door

(30:43):
or walk to the car, and I had toopen the door on my own.

Speaker 1 (30:48):
Mama and daddy didn't raise him right, see, because I
would have done.
I would have walked up to yourdoor knocked, like, hey, how's
it going Right?

Speaker 2 (30:56):
A little brief talk, make sure your door's locked and
then walk you to the door open,that's what I'm saying, but
when I did bring that up, hemade it seem like I was asking
for too much no, that wasn't toomuch, that's just that should
be like bare minimum.

Speaker 1 (31:09):
That's yeah, bare minimum, default.
Y'all need to listen okay nextwe're talking about.
I love it so next what happened?
Like what happened after that.

Speaker 2 (31:20):
So after that we went to the gym and, you know,
everything was good.
But yeah, we went out to dinnerthat next night and he just
didn't do things that I expected.
We were talking for two months,you know.
So I was like, okay, he's goingto ask me to be his girlfriend.

Speaker 1 (31:37):
But I think that's my mistake, where I just had this
high expectation of him, youknow uh-huh so so yeah, he just
didn't do anything grand for mewhat would be grand, like what's
a yeah for hokalani, what'sgrand.
I uh I guess I'm not catchingthe grand thing like.

Speaker 2 (31:57):
If so, he messed up on being chivalrous yeah um,
what was like the final straw towhere it's like yo, he's not
gonna be, he ain't it the finalstraw was that, right when we
left each other, he startedfollowing girls that lives in
his, in his area.

Speaker 1 (32:17):
Following as in like on IG.

Speaker 2 (32:19):
On TikTok.

Speaker 1 (32:22):
Okay, Wait hold up, so that bothered you.
Like him following other women,yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:31):
I wouldn't care if it was like a couple days later or
like the next week, but thefact that he did it as we were
saying goodbye to one another.
You know, I just had a goodgoodbye to one another, you know
, I just had a good time withyou, you know yeah and he just
started following girls.
So I was like oh, maybe thisisn't my person that was your
red flag yeah oh, I know, butI'm also a red flag.
I'm gonna take accountability.

(32:52):
I shouldn't be looking at thatstuff if we're just in the
talking stage yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 (32:58):
You're like, oh, who's he following?
So you, you are you like thatnow, or did you used to be like
that?

Speaker 2 (33:05):
to check up on so, yeah, I used to be like that
uh-huh.
Keep in mind this was like acouple weeks ago, but I've, I'm
starting to work on it.
You know, I don't think I willever do that again why does that
bother women?

Speaker 1 (33:18):
Because I used to be in that years, years ago.
I used to be in that samesituation, to where the woman
that I'm with my wife, she wouldtrip out on like who I'm
following and who's following me, yeah.
So why does that bother womenso much?
Because for guys it's like oh,you're following him, oh, cool,

(33:43):
cool, cool, cool, cool, cool,cool, whatever whatever cool
cool, and we just go in the gymand hit it a little bit harder,
you know, and never say nothing.

Speaker 2 (33:47):
But with women like why, why is that?
I don't know.
We just want to feel like apriority to you guys if you're
following all these girls.
Obviously you're going to seethem all over your, your page,
you know okay so I don't know, Ijust see that okay we just want
to feel wanted and yearned over, you know.
So if we see that you'refollowing so many girls, we're
like, okay, well, your eyes arestill on these other people

(34:09):
uh-huh so why are we talking?

Speaker 1 (34:11):
you know, oh, what if this person and I'm gonna play
devil's advocate for a littlebit what if this person was like
, let's say, in the social mediascene, like he's a you know
influencer, slash contentcreator and he's, you know,
getting these females because,you know, because of clout, or
because, oh, this is anopportunity for him to like, get
him to an audience that he'snot reaching out to?

(34:34):
How would that?

Speaker 2 (34:35):
if he, if it's for his job, you know, if he's a
content creator, that's totallyfine.

Speaker 1 (34:40):
Okay, was this guy a content creator?

Speaker 2 (34:44):
No, not, really Not really so I'm like.
Why are you following her?

Speaker 1 (34:48):
Ah, he fumbled that bag.

Speaker 2 (34:50):
It just sucks because we were in a long distance, you
know, and the fact that hefollowed girls in his city like
just kind of stung a bit.
Oh yeah, oh, yeah, that's, oh,um, where's he?

Speaker 1 (35:04):
coming from arizona and you're in las vegas, ain't
that like a like a three-hourdrive or some shit?
It's literally so close, huhand dude, I would see you like
every weekend.
Yeah, yeah, because I've had along distance relationship where
it was california and Las Vegasand I drove like at least once
a month.
You know I made that drivebecause I didn't want to fly,
kind of scared.
But I drove that what that?

(35:26):
Six, seven hours, just for likethat day and a half, and then
drove back but yeah, oh, two,three hours is nothing.
That's what I'm saying.

(35:47):
I feel like, man, I could justchill at a motel, six or some
shit, and just right, I'll letyou tomorrow, girl.
But I don't know, I I guess Iwas just asking too much of him.
Ah, man, I think asking toomuch is when, like I guess a
feet, a woman is, I want to sayjust like, just totally up in
your business, like, oh, why,why, when, when, why, why, why?
I think it's all like whenyou're in that talking stage and
she comes with the whys and thewins, like a little too much.
I think that's when the toomuch thing is true, but it's

(36:08):
like so yeah, that was me ohreally, you're like the win, win
, win, why, why, why?

Speaker 2 (36:12):
yeah, just because, I don't know, I felt the vibe.

Speaker 1 (36:16):
I was like, oh yeah, we're definitely gonna be like
locked in uh-huh so I was justlike already in the mindset oh,
we're in a relationship oh so inthe talking stages, like what
gave you that implication of hey, this is my dude like?

Speaker 2 (36:31):
just the way we communicated with one another
was it a babe thing?

Speaker 1 (36:35):
no we weren't at the babe stage yet.
Okay, okay, okay.

Speaker 2 (36:37):
But yeah, just the way we conversated and our life
stories just connected.

Speaker 1 (36:42):
Uh-huh.

Speaker 2 (36:43):
So I felt so connected to him, uh-huh yeah.

Speaker 1 (36:47):
That's crazy because it's coming from a woman's point
of view and I know I've heard alot of stories from guys saying
the same thing.
But you know, like from theirview, but the woman's like, oh
man, like it didn't happen forus and I was just like, damn, I
wonder why.
And now I'm not saying it'sreassuring or whatever, I'm not
happy that it happened to you,but it's good to hear you know

(37:13):
your side of the story, to whereyou thought it was something
but it wasn't, Because I'musually hearing the guys like,
man, I thought she was the onedog, she just I don't know what
happened yeah, you know.

Speaker 2 (37:20):
No, it's not that like I don't think that we can't
be something.
Of course we could be somethingin the future, uh-huh, but I
feel like I have to do someinternal work you know yeah yeah
, before getting into somethingnew.
So my last relationship endedback in nove.

Speaker 1 (37:37):
November of 24.
Mm-hmm, okay.

Speaker 2 (37:39):
So it's still pretty recent, you know.
So I'm currently in my healingphase.

Speaker 1 (37:43):
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 (37:44):
But still like talking, dating, just finding
out what I like and don't wantin a person, Mm-hmm, you know.

Speaker 1 (37:52):
Yeah.
Let me ask you this then, whenyou're in your dating stage,
right, does it make you sometype of woman of the night if
you're going on multiple datesbut you're not giving up the
cookie?
You're just going out to findif this person is checking off
all the boxes?

Speaker 2 (38:11):
No, I don't think you're a woman of the night or a
hoe A whore.

Speaker 1 (38:18):
I tried to make it PG .
She got it out of me.
I'm sorry.
No, I'm playing.

Speaker 2 (38:23):
No, I don't think you are Like I said.
You're just trying to figureout what you want and don't want
in a person.
And how are you going to findthat out if you're only talking
to one person?
You know Exactly.

Speaker 1 (38:36):
Because people like to perceive, like, because I
tell guys I was like dude, goout.
You don't have to like slangthe dick, but you could be like
hey, man, I kind of like you,but there's something about you
I don't like.
I'm not going to, you know,waste my time or yours.
I'm going to the next.

Speaker 2 (38:52):
Yeah, so you keep that mental note for the next
person You're like okay, do theydo the?

Speaker 1 (39:01):
thing that I don't like.
If they do, then I'm gonna cutit off.
Yeah, easy, see, I hate theperception of when females do
that, they're considered whores.
When guys do it, they'reconsidered whores too.
But there's no like canoodlinginvolved, right, it's like the
most that you probably get islike a, a kiss on the cheek.
You know like how we, uh, likelocals here, they greet each
other.
Yeah, that's like the farthest.
You're probably going to getMaybe a butt tap, I don't know.

(39:22):
I don't know how it is out here.
Yeah, that's the farthest.
And then they're consideredlike, because the island's so
small, it's like, oh, you wentout with him.

Speaker 2 (39:30):
And then you go out with him the next week and
people are looking down on you.

Speaker 1 (39:40):
Yeah, you're like in our single stages right now.
I don't think we'd be able tosurvive like this type of this
type of scene, because, I'm notgonna lie to you, I think in
other people's eyes I probablylook more like a, like a whore,
because I like to go out on,like, say, coffee dates.
I like to go on I do this a lotwhen I was single errand dates

(40:01):
to where I get to get my shitdone.
But she would tag along and ifshe needs to get something from
a Target she can, but I'm goingto get my shit done Like I'll go
grocery store shopping.

Speaker 2 (40:10):
Yeah, that's cute.
I like that.
Errand dates are always so fun,right.

Speaker 1 (40:22):
Because you can and talk to someone bad, you know,
and you get to observe how theydo certain things right.
Oh, I was taught this at ayoung age where, um, you want to
see the person that you mightpotentially be with when they're
arguing with, like theirparents or family members or
their close friends, because ifyou see them arguing, you could.
You could see that person whenthey're pressured, you know,
because if that's how they actwith them, they'll definitely

(40:44):
how are they going to act withme?
Yeah, eight to nine out of tentimes.
That's how they'll talk to youthat way.
So if he or she is like supercalm and be like you know what,
we'll come up with a solution.
You got a good one because whenyou two argue, it's like you
know what.
I know he's kind of solidbecause like he's not going to
back off.

(41:04):
He's going to try and find asolution and if it's not right,
then he'll.
You know like he'll keep ontrying.
Oh my gosh, yeah, yeah.
Has that ever came across youto where you found like someone
that was like God damn, he waspretty good, but then you know
like just the stars didn't alignright and you're just like yo,

(41:26):
we got to like cut it off.

Speaker 2 (41:27):
So yeah.

Speaker 1 (41:28):
Is that the November one?

Speaker 2 (41:30):
That's my ex, oh, okay.

Speaker 1 (41:31):
That's done and over with.
Oh okay.

Speaker 2 (41:33):
But the one that just most recently happened the one
that I felt connected with.
Yeah, I feel like that with himlike he was good, like he was
good to go, he was so good it'sjust me, I, I know it's so crazy
I never take accountability,I'm growing, but you aren't.
Yeah, oh my, thank you but yeah, because he's like older, um,

(41:59):
he's ready to have someone who'slike you know, not everybody's
like completely healed, but issomeone, or he wants someone
more mature and they're readyand I don't feel like I was
ready.
He also doesn't feel like I wasready uh-huh so we just came to
the agreement like maybe not nowbut maybe later, if that's good
as a line.
Yeah if god wants us together,then we'll be together, but

(42:23):
right now let me work on myself,you work on yourself, and then
yeah that's super mature.

Speaker 1 (42:28):
Um, did he bring that up or did you, or was it just
the same?

Speaker 2 (42:32):
it was kind of mutual okay, okay and then we said our
final goodbye.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:37):
So was there tears involved.

Speaker 2 (42:40):
Oh my God, On my end, of course.

Speaker 1 (42:41):
Oh, I'm sorry.
No, it's fine.
But no, that's good that youguys communicate that way.
How old is too old for you?

Speaker 2 (42:50):
Too old.
I want to date older than 35.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
35 years older than you or 30?

Speaker 2 (42:56):
35 years old.

Speaker 1 (42:57):
Oh, ok, well, I'm 25.

Speaker 2 (43:00):
Uh-huh and yeah I think a decade older is fine.

Speaker 1 (43:02):
Oh, okay, how old was he?
Compared to you, he was 32.
Wasn't that bad?

Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah, seven years, yeah, not that bad.

Speaker 1 (43:10):
Because, like saying, you know you get hitched, like
you know 30 or some shit, yeah,27, 37.
Yeah, he still has time to likerun with the kids and not like
be sore.
You know what I'm saying.
No, I mean, like you know,because that's like one, one of
my big things.
Um, because uh, I'm all aboutfitness and like trying to be
healthy and stuff, and I tell mywife this all the time.

(43:31):
It's like when the small ones,when they're like in sports and
stuff, my boy, he likes to playbasketball and football.
I want to run alongside himwhen he's, you know, running
towards the touch.
You know, like I want to be,like come on, come on, get a
catch me.
You know I'm saying like, yeah,I want to do that.
Or if my little one plays uhlike say, softball or boxing or

(43:52):
whatever, like I want to runaround the mound or I want her
to hit me and I'm me not gethurt, like that you know you
don't want to be in a wheelchairoh hell no, because I know some
guys right now they're like intheir 60s and then I don't know
how they're doing it.
hey, kudos to y'all.
They're getting these like 20,30 year olds right, and I'm just

(44:12):
like, fuck, that mojo ishitting.
Pop out a baby and they're like, damn, they, they're 10 and
you're 70.
Holy fuck, that's insane.
How can you?
You know what I'm saying.
Get some Heelys, some rollerskates or something I don't know
.
I don't know how you're goingto keep up, but I know their
annoyance span is just thisshort.

(44:33):
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, so yeah, when do you wantto have kids?

Speaker 2 (44:40):
yeah, like when do you want to have kids, or if you
want to have kids I do want tohave kids, probably within the
next five years.

Speaker 1 (44:44):
Yeah, girl here, not in vegas, but here here yeah
yeah, here yeah I want to raisethem here okay, um, we talked
earlier and, um, she's living invegas right now.
I'm not gonna say where, butyou want to come back here.
When is this?
Say where, but you want to comeback here.
When is this?
Like one, why do you want tocome back?
And then, two is there, like,let's say, a plan or a date on

(45:10):
when this move is happening?

Speaker 2 (45:12):
So the reason why I do want to move back is because
my family is here, obviously.

Speaker 1 (45:16):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (45:17):
And because I am a content creator and most of my
content is all about polynesians, you know, I just feel like
it's more fitting if I do movehere, I could perpetuate the
culture even more.

Speaker 1 (45:29):
So, yeah, so mostly family and culture, and I also
do want to dance for a luau outhere we're as in like um, uh, uh
, okay, a luau, uh, okay, okay,I got you, I got you, yeah, yeah
there's so many to pick yeah,yeah I would just have to see
which one like matches my vibe,you know yeah but um timeline

(45:51):
wise, hopefully within the nextyear really that know Well, my
lease is up in February, so oh,ma-ma-ma-mail.

Speaker 2 (46:01):
So maybe February.

Speaker 1 (46:03):
Girl, let me ask you this Besides like what's your
content primarily on right now?
Is it dancing?
Would you ever venture out ofthat and do anything else, or
are you strictly staying on thatcontent?

Speaker 2 (46:19):
That's like my niche.

Speaker 1 (46:21):
Okay, niche, niche, sorry, sorry.

Speaker 2 (46:24):
So that's honestly my money maker.
Obviously, it's not all aboutthe money.
That's where I get the mostviews, so if it's working, why
would I switch it up?

Speaker 1 (46:36):
Facts have you ever or would you ever consider of
like, say, being on someoneelse's uh platform?
Like, say me right, I know I'vebeen writing scripts, like
comedy scripts and stuff.
Um, if I would have like to say, asked you to be like playing
the lead female in my comedyscript, would you step out of

(46:59):
your niche to do that?
Or would you strictly just be,you know, put me down and say,
hey, you know what I can't do it, I'm doing my stuff.

Speaker 2 (47:07):
I feel like I would, depending on what the script is
about, you know.
Just because there are certainimages that you have to try to
keep, especially beingPolynesian and growing up in the
Polynesian community.
We just have a different levelof being more conservative, I
guess oh yes, I've noticed that.

Speaker 1 (47:31):
I don't want to say you guys don't have a sense of
humor, but your sense of humoris it's more, it's more limited.

Speaker 2 (47:38):
Yeah just because we don't want to just embarrass
ourselves, but also our family,yeah, our village, you know.

Speaker 1 (47:45):
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 (47:45):
So that's so funny that we bring this up, because
I've been getting a lot ofquestions.
If I'm going to go on LoveIsland, you know Uh-huh, and
they just do so many raunchythings.

Speaker 1 (47:58):
They do.

Speaker 2 (48:01):
I can't do that to myself or my family or my
Polynesian community.

Speaker 1 (48:04):
Yeah, I can't, girl.
Let me tell you this becausesomeone, including my wife,
asked me would I ever go on LoveIsland?
And I'm like, man, hell, yeah.
And then she was like, and thenI would tell her why.
And my reason is you know what,if I would have went on one,
I'd be where the food is, fuckthat.

(48:25):
Two, I would definitely talk tothe producers and be like, hey,
who do you want me to be gay for?
And I'm like, hey, try me.
You know I'm saying like man,you want me to ruffle some
feathers, want to make it likeinteresting, I'll pretend to be
gay and see if all these guyswould like maybe be come out and
be gay.
You know, just to like, just to, yeah, just to start one.

(48:49):
And yeah, oh, my God, yeah, Iwould go on Love Island just for
that comedic relief.
As for hooking up with otherwomen and I tell people this a
lot I think I'm out of my let'sfuck stage.
That first perception of damn,she hot, I'd smash.
I'm more into like the wholeconversation, like I want to get

(49:11):
into your mind, like yourintellect, is more important to
me.
Holding the conversation is waymore important, and if I can't
keep a conversation going withyou, it's like fuck.
I'm kind of like I don't know.
You want to go get some ribs orsomething.
Maybe we could hang and have,yeah, but you said, did Love
Island ever reach out to you?
Is that?

Speaker 2 (49:30):
how that discussion came up.
I'm just a Love Island obsessed, are you really?

Speaker 1 (49:34):
Yeah, there's this popular girl on there.
Huda, huda.
What she did?
Did she got dirty?
I mean, did she got dirty, butwas she dealt?

Speaker 2 (49:47):
did she get dealt a dirty card or whatever for
what's happening?
Yeah, I definitely feel likethe producers messed her up to
make her seem like the villainyou know.
But she's just like us girls.
We just want to be loved.

Speaker 1 (49:57):
You know, that's what my wife said it's like she
knows what she wants and theseguys weren't like giving it to
her.
Or she would say something towhere it's like yo, this is what
I want, man.
If you're not bringing it, saysomething to where it's like yo,
this is what I want, man.
If you're not bringing it, orlike I'm telling you this now
because that's the kind of man Iwant, because I have a seed as
my.
You know, she also has a littleone.
Yeah, she has a baby.

(50:17):
Yeah, I'm not like real big ona love island, but my wife gives
me like the summaries.
So I'm like, oh, okay, and I'dbe watching.
I'm like damn, and not to belike.
There's some handsome people onthere.
I'm like God, they're real.
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (50:35):
You look like AI, yeah, and then I see the women.

Speaker 1 (50:38):
I'm like you know what they are right, you know
what I'm saying.
I'm more intrigued Like dude,that guy, one of the guys, yeah,
it's, that jawline is superperfect.
Oh yeah, the ab line is likedang.
You actually see six, it ain'tfive and a half, it ain't four.
It's like damn Okay, skinny asslegs though, but I'm just like,

(51:01):
hot damn, where do y'all befighting these motherfuckers,
the casting was really good thisyear.
Okay, I got to watch more, butwhat makes it so good than the
previous years?
I just feel like everybody was alot more attractive Like
mentally wise, or just whole?
Well, their look wise, ohreally, could you ever do it
Like, let's say, take out thewhole, you know Polynesian thing

(51:22):
, you're just you, you're notgoing to be disrespecting your
village or your last name?
Would you be able to do whatthey would do Like, say, pick a
partner, every night you choosea different one, or you got
chosen, lay in bed with them,maybe not canoodle, Maybe
something might happen, butcould you be able to do that?

Speaker 2 (51:39):
100%.
Wow 100%, I would.

Speaker 1 (51:43):
Man?
I don't know, man, because youknow I'd be scared with my feet
and they'd be walking likebarefooted I'm just like dog if
I'm insecure on my toes.

Speaker 2 (51:58):
Man, let me tell you something.
I'm insecure with a lot ofthings, man, but holy yeah, and
they just walk around in abikini, all all day long.

Speaker 1 (52:01):
Yeah, see, man, I'm liking some basketball shorts
and a tank top.
I ain't taking off my shirt,man, I ain't trying to get
sunburned, you know.
I'm saying they are in fiji ohoh yeah, they are.
So if, okay, hypotheticallyspeaking, if they would have
called you right now, would yoube able to go?
yes, yes, a thousand percent ohmy gosh, bring me back.

(52:24):
Bring me back a burger, right,I will, hell, yeah, um, okay.
So before we dip out, um, wetalked again and you said you
met a boy somewhere up there I'mnot gonna say where, you know
what, say where moanies, allright, okay.
So we, we talked about moanies.
I had a, I had a, um, a littleencounter with moanis, and this

(52:47):
is in the Kapolei region, wherethe Kamakana Mall, kamakana,
yeah, kamakana Me and my wifewent there one night and, mind
you, it wasn't full or whatever.
This dude in the, I guess thesecurity person, said it's like,
oh, you need a reservation toget in.

(53:08):
And I'm like, whoa, hold up,ain't nobody in there player.
And it's like, oh, you need areservation to get in.
And I'm like, whoa, hold up,ain't nobody in there player.
And it's like, oh, no, man, I'msorry, when you need a
reservation, I was like I betnever came back.
That was my moana experienceand I'm never going back there,
oh my god.
So you said there's one inwaikiki yes and, um, I'm
hesitant to go there.

Speaker 2 (53:24):
So tell me about this boy that you met there and
you're going on a date later ontoday yeah but you ate though
yeah you know, hey, hey, girlsneed to get fed, yeah so, um,
yeah, so the moanies that youwere talking about is actually a
restaurant okay but the moaniesthat I'm talking about is like

(53:45):
more of a nightclub okay, inoahu.
So yeah, I was just vibingchilling with my friends and
there's this tall, handsomepolynesian boy and I was like I
gotta talk to that.
But I didn't, I was too shy, soI told my sister.
I was like can you tell him?
Can you tell him that I thinkhe's cute uh-huh so she told his

(54:06):
friend, his friend told him.
Then he came up to me.

Speaker 1 (54:10):
That's okay.
So he made the move, comingtowards you by the relay message
.

Speaker 2 (54:18):
Yeah, just because we were playing like eye tag the
whole entire night.

Speaker 1 (54:22):
Oh, okay, so he knew he's seen you.

Speaker 2 (54:26):
Yeah we obviously liked each other you know, but
after Moani's we did chat alittle bit and then he said he
was hesitant on talking to mebecause I look intimidating.
I'm like I'm just having funokay.

Speaker 1 (54:43):
So first, how was your makeup like?
Because my wife's a makeupartist, so maybe I could see
where the intimidation came from.
So was your eye makeup like?
Was it smoky?
Did you have the cat eyes?

Speaker 2 (54:58):
It was just like this , just darker.

Speaker 1 (55:01):
Okay, see, that could be.
It Was your lipstick.
Was it like plump red, Was itdark or was it?

Speaker 2 (55:07):
It was honestly just like my face right now yeah.

Speaker 1 (55:10):
Okay, and then did you have the flower in your hair
?

Speaker 2 (55:13):
I did.
I had the Pua signifying thatI'm single.

Speaker 1 (55:16):
On the right side.
Okay, you're a wearer.
What were you wearing?

Speaker 2 (55:23):
I was wearing a short skirt and a tank top.

Speaker 1 (55:27):
What color?

Speaker 2 (55:28):
Was my skirt.
It was a jean skirt and a blacktank top.

Speaker 1 (55:31):
Okay, that's neutral.
Your face was it skank?
Were you like?
Were you smiling throughout thenight, or was there a time
where you were like?

Speaker 2 (55:39):
No, I have an RBF.

Speaker 1 (55:42):
That's where it was.
The RBF does it.
For a lot of guys.
It's like, it's like it's like,if so, when a guy sees an RBF,
it's it's more like do I want torisk it?
Or it's when it's like oh dude,she, nah, she's.
She's strictly with her girls,she's not trying to get macked
on, all she wants to do is gigon a dance floor, maybe get a
little tipsy.

(56:04):
That's exactly where his facewould work.
Okay, so after the night youtalked with him, chopped it up.
He said you're intimidating.
I'm going to assume that youlaughed and you're like stop, no
, I wasn't.

Speaker 2 (56:17):
Well, he said, my status is intimidating as well.

Speaker 1 (56:21):
Because he knew who you were.

Speaker 2 (56:23):
Yeah, prior.

Speaker 1 (56:24):
What's your status?

Speaker 2 (56:25):
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (56:26):
Like single, I'm just a regular girl.

Speaker 2 (56:28):
The right side says single.
Could it be your numbers?
No, he said status, as in mynumbers on social media.

Speaker 1 (56:33):
Man fuck that dude.
You shoot your shot wherever,whenever One million, three
million.
Fuck that, that's what I'msaying.

Speaker 2 (56:41):
If you see that, why not shoot your shot?

Speaker 1 (56:44):
Oh my, God, I tell we're going to continue this.
But I tell my boys every timeit's like you do not know where
it's going to lead, unless youshoot your shot.

Speaker 2 (56:55):
Exactly.
Do you want to go homeregretting it?

Speaker 1 (56:58):
Exactly the what if?
Fuck living with the what ifyou don't want to die with the
what if?

Speaker 2 (57:02):
And if you get rejected, okay, so what?

Speaker 1 (57:04):
Move the fuck on, grab yourself a Taco Bell, watch
yourself some Family Guy andgig it up.
You know I'm saying, oh my gosh, okay, so stat.
So he was intimidated by yourstatus.
Um, and then how did the?
How did he get the yes?
Or like, how did the datehappen?

Speaker 2 (57:22):
so, um, we were supposed to go to another bar
like he was like, do you justwant to go to the beach?
And I was like yes at night.
Yeah, okay so we went to thebeach and it was so romantic
just y'all too just us too.
We ditched our friends he drove.
Yeah, okay, yeah, sober andeverything sober, sober, oh,
that's good, that's good that'sreal good.
A plus uh-huh so we went to thebeach and we're just talking

(57:44):
all night long.
And then he's like you want toget dinner tomorrow, I know.

Speaker 1 (57:49):
Oh my.

Speaker 2 (57:50):
God, so we have dinner tonight.

Speaker 1 (57:52):
Where Do you know where?

Speaker 2 (57:54):
No, not yet, Not yet.

Speaker 1 (57:57):
If he says here, is that going to turn you off?
Like if he texts you here andnot go to your door, is that
going to turn you off, or isthat like okay, strike one.

Speaker 2 (58:08):
No, that's fine.
As long as he opens my door forme.

Speaker 1 (58:12):
The car door or the restaurant door.

Speaker 2 (58:14):
The car door.

Speaker 1 (58:15):
Okay, I'll give you that one.

Speaker 2 (58:16):
Yeah, I'll give you that one, you know, but he did
yesterday, so I'm like okay.

Speaker 1 (58:20):
He's good, we're in the good.
He got mannerisms.
Yes, okay, so you got dinnertonight.
He likes to say the bill comes,oh, no, no, prior to that.
Are you an appetizer type ofperson?
Appetizer, you got the maincourse.
How about dinner?
I mean, how about dinner?
How about dessert?
Are you a dessert person too?

Speaker 2 (58:39):
Sometimes depending how full I am Cool After dessert
.

Speaker 1 (58:43):
do you play the check dance, as so they call it?

Speaker 2 (58:49):
I'm like no, I'll put my card down.
And then he should be like no,I got it.

Speaker 1 (58:54):
Yeah, but you could be like I'm like shaking.
It's like, damn, this is a lot.
It's like I'm trying to paythis tomahawk man, fuck this.
I'm just like gradually Okay,no, yeah, gradually okay, but
but the attempt would be there.
Yes, I respect women that doesthat.
Do that?
I mean yeah because, um, I'vebeen in a lot of situations

(59:14):
before where, of course, youknow, like I'm down pain, like
I'm 100, I'm down pain, but Iwould like to see the person
across from me just like oh, andI'm like oh, no man, I got it,
I got it, got it.
You know, that counts exactly.
Yeah, knowing damn well sheain't gonna pay.

Speaker 2 (59:33):
You know, man but if that did happen to me one time,
where I was like, oh, I'll payfor it, expecting him to be like
, oh no, and he's like, are yousure?
And I had to pay for it hedidn't do like.

Speaker 1 (59:44):
Oh man, you know what half seas no, like it's that
type of?
Is that type of era right now,you know, big girl energy it was
like okay, you got it really,yeah, I would have like, damn, I
would have paid for your gas orsomething.
No, nothing, was he a gentlemanat least.
Oh, he got a free meal yeah,honestly, honestly, hey, thanks.

(01:00:07):
Honestly, honestly, hey, thanks,thanks, babe, check you on the
DVD.
That's funny as hell.
So he does everything righttonight.
All right, so I'm going to.
I'm going to assume the longdistance thing You'd continue
with the long distance thing.

Speaker 2 (01:00:25):
Yeah, but I am thinking about moving here, so
it wouldn't be too long.
Yeah, in February, right?

Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
Hmm, okay, what is this guy's features Like?
What made you catch his eye, orwhat does he look like for him
to catch your eye?
I mean?

Speaker 2 (01:00:42):
Tall and Polynesian Tatted Oof so fun Tatted poly.

Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
Okay, okay, okay, I got you.
I okay, okay, okay, I got you,I got you got you.
Yeah, just like every other guyon this island, but you said
tall though.
So what are you talking about?
Like what?

Speaker 2 (01:00:58):
5'11 he was like 6'4 football player status yeah
plays basketball.

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
So was he like big, big, or was he like muscle big?
He was like like thick, slim,thick, or was he like muscle big
.

Speaker 2 (01:01:10):
He was like thick, slim, thick, yeah, yeah.
So that's like a non-negotiablefor mine.
Now they have to be tall.
My ex was the same height as me.

Speaker 1 (01:01:19):
So, and I will never do that again when you have the
heels on it's.

Speaker 2 (01:01:23):
I'm taller than him.

Speaker 1 (01:01:24):
Ah, but if he was taller than you, but with your
heels on same height, is thatokay too?

Speaker 2 (01:01:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:01:29):
Hey, my future kings.
Hey, if this doesn't work out,hey man you know holler at her
Short kings, short kings, makesure you have them platform
shoes when you guys are goingout.
If you guys are going to thebeach, that's okay, because you
might have an advantage with thesand dip.
Ain't nobody tall in the ocean,so that's okay, too Okay.

(01:01:50):
And let's see this Move backhere.
Does this guy have a socialmedia presence?

Speaker 2 (01:01:58):
No, no, no.

Speaker 1 (01:02:00):
Is that a red flag, or is that more of a?
Okay, I love it, uh-huh.

Speaker 2 (01:02:04):
I love it.
I love when social media is mything and then he has his own
thing.
Go ahead.

Speaker 1 (01:02:09):
Okay, and let's say hypothetically I use that word a
lot today you got with someonewith a social media presence.
Would that be okay with you too?
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:02:23):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
He has his own audience and you have your own
audience.
Yeah, Huh, I don't think I wouldever want to be one of those,
those um couples, though oh fuck, no, yeah, no hell, no I like
doing my own stuff, he does hisown things, yeah oh, preach on
that, because I've been writingthese scripts and, like, I've
been trying to write scripts forme and my wife and I just

(01:02:46):
couldn't find one.
But then I finally did and it'slike the where you going.
So the script is is that me andher would be on the couch and I
would go get something.
And she'll be like, oh, whereyou going, and I'm like getting
this.
And then I go to the bathroom,get up.
She's on the bathroom floor,where you going.
I'm like dude, I'm justfinishing the bathroom.
And then it's like I want somemilk.

(01:03:06):
All right, she would.
She would get up, get something.
I'm like, oh, where are yougoing.
So it's like one of thosethings, but like, as like the
whole couple, I don't see myselfdoing that yet Like the script,
stuff is fine you know likehere and there, but like being a
full on.
Couple content creator.
Yeah, oh no, no, definitely not.
No, there's too many.

(01:03:26):
I think I'll end up in divorce.
Yeah, you know, or like maybe abreakup, because, dude, what if
?
What if your thing works more,better than this?
You know her thing and it'slike yo, my thing's been working
, you got to be using my scriptand it's just too much static
yeah, so it's best to just keepit separate.
Oh, definitely oh yeah, ok, thatwas fun.

(01:03:49):
That was so much fun.
That was super fun.
Girl, it was Do you have anyshout outs or anything, or where
can these people find you at?

Speaker 2 (01:03:56):
Okay, yes, I want to shout out my pupu, ori Tevaku
Nui, living in Las Vegas.

Speaker 1 (01:04:02):
Hey 702.

Speaker 2 (01:04:03):
Yes and yes, you can find me on Instagram at Hokulani
H-O-K-U-L-V-N-I, and same thingon TikTok.

Speaker 1 (01:04:12):
Well said, ko Studios .
Thank you for the lovely home.
Rafi Baye, thank you for thelovely beats man, and with that
I'm Chris and I'm Hoku, and weare out this bitch.
Peace, good job.