A creative soul finds her voice through adversity. That's the story of Ashley Abbott, model, singer, and mother who joins us for an intimate conversation about finding your path despite the noise of critics.
Having known each other since their dancing days, Chris and Ashley dive into her recent engagement (breaking news!) and upcoming Cancun vacation before exploring her dual creative journey through modeling and music. What started as photoshoots has evolved into a pattern of creative reinvention, with Ashley describing how her modeling career has experienced waves depending on location and life circumstances.
"Being in the studio is therapeutic for me," Ashley shares, explaining how songwriting became her sanctuary about a year and a half ago. She's proud of writing all her own lyrics, finding the creative process healing during periods of grief and personal challenge. This conversation reveals how artistic expression serves as more than a career—it's a lifeline for emotional wellbeing.
Perhaps most valuable is Ashley's wisdom on handling negativity. As someone frequently in the public eye, she's developed a unique perspective: "Haters are fans who don't know how to express their love in a positive way." She explains how critics often project their own insecurities, particularly when they see someone brave enough to pursue what they themselves fear attempting.
Between candid zodiac discussions (fellow Cancers unite!) and humorous hypotheticals about cartoon character attractions, the conversation offers a beautiful blend of professional insight and personal vulnerability. Ashley balances motherhood to a teenager and a four-year-old while pursuing her passions, demonstrating how creative lives rarely follow linear paths.
• Recently became engaged and is planning a Cancun vacation with her fiancé
• Transitioned into modeling first, experiencing waves of success depending on location and life circumstances
• Started pursuing singing seriously about a year and a half ago, focusing on writing her own songs
• Finds studio time and creative expression therapeutic for mental health
• Developed strategies for handling negative comments on social media
• Believes haters are actually fans who don't know how to express their love positively
• Balances creative pursuits with motherhood to a 14-year-old and 4-year-old
• Identifies strongly with Cancer zodiac traits of being nurturing, protective, and emotional
• Encourages new creatives to persist despite negativity from others
You can find Ashley on Instagram @aaaabbott and on YouTube as Ashley Abbott. Her music is available on Spotify - look for "Intentions," "Ethereal Love," "Zodiac," and "Lust."
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
5, 4, 3, 2, 1, remember my marrow.
Welcome back to another episodeof the Relationship Method
Podcast.
I'm Chris, and today I have avery special guest one of my
homegirls from back home.
She's a mom, she's a model, sheworks for a living too.
She's also a hot damn singer,and a pretty damn good one.
(00:31):
Yo give it up for Miss AshleyAbbott.
Yay, hey, Happy New Year.
Oh hell, no, no.
Thank you for coming along andjoining me, me on this lovely uh
podcast day of course hell yeah, ask before I uh.
Before we get into it, let meask you how did I get the yes
(00:55):
from you?
Speaker 2 (00:57):
I mean, we're just.
We were always tight back inthe day, so it was an automatic.
Yes, you know like we startedoff with dancing choreography
together and yeah, yeah, we, wewere dancing together.
I don't know if you rememberthat, but I do remember it so
long ago.
You know so, and we even hadlike these little nicknames for
each other, like omelet and star.
I don't even know how thathappened, but that happened it
(01:20):
just stuck, it just stuck yeahand then you said dancing.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
We were in um.
Was it Francine's studio inMarina?
Speaker 2 (01:28):
I remember it was with J-Boy, it was.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
J, yeah, yeah, so it was rhythmic flow you were a
part of rhythmic flow.
Yes, you were a part of thatfor a cool minute.
So yeah, oh, fucking memories,man, yeah, memories man yeah but
yeah, hell yeah.
So that's how I got the yes.
So, ash, like, how's your weekbeen, how's your day going?
Speaker 2 (01:53):
my week has been actually kind of crazy, and
that's because I'm ready to drumroll vacation.
Where are you going?
I'm going to Cancun oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Okay, how long are you going to be out there for?
5 days, 4 nights you're goingto get full, full fat.
Oh my gosh, and freaking tipsy,are you going with um, with
(02:27):
your mans, with your girls, withyour team?
Who you?
Speaker 2 (02:30):
going.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I'm definitely going with my man, so uh-huh with your
mans, with my okay, so thatthat that x'd out the question
of you being single or not.
So she's taken y'all, sorry,sorry, boo, freaking boo.
And then with your mans, likehow long you been with your mans
(02:51):
for?
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I'd say we were, because it was a very
interesting like transition withhim.
It was so, I would say, gettingto know and dating and
everything.
A total of two years.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Oh nice.
And you said what getting?
To know and dating andeverything, uh a total of two
years, oh nice.
And you said what getting toknow and dating?
Speaker 2 (03:09):
so simultaneously you were uh dating and getting to
know him yeah, like, like, yeah,like, I wanted to take things
slow, you know that's good yeah,yeah just so, I don't know.
I feel like I've beentraumatized in the past so you
know like yeah, yeah this time Igotta make sure you know, take
(03:29):
it slow.
And he agreed to like.
It's one of those things where,like, it was like a mutual
respect thing for each other, soit worked out oh, that's real
good.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
I'm very happy for you.
Um, could this guy be?
Is it too early to say like theone, or is you guys are still
working in that stage?
Speaker 2 (03:49):
that honeymoon stage honeymoon phase well, I guess,
since you're asking, we recentlyjust got engaged like
congratulations man I haven'tannounced it yet, but I feel
like by the time this, thisvideo comes out, it's gonna be
announced, because I'mannouncing it next week.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's going to.
You're going to come out beforethis one.
Yeah, oh, but fuck manCongratulations.
I know right, I'm engaged.
Oh girl, Congratulations.
How did it happen?
Well, give me the setting.
Um, okay, it's good, it's oneof them.
(04:34):
Sorry, I got you it's gonna beone of them stories, all right
okay, I can tell you how ithappened.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
honestly, it was sweet.
The way it happened was verysweet.
Um, he, he, we were, we werejust in a very intimate setting
and you know, he did start offwith asking me like, oh, you
know, like you would have likekids with me and stuff.
And I'm like, yeah, if you wanta baby, I'd give you a baby.
You know, I think men just kindof get like, um, they worry, oh
(05:03):
, I've already have kids, solike, maybe she's done right.
And and then I was like, no, ifyou really want a baby, I'll
give you a baby.
Like I want, I want another onetoo.
Anyways, like I'm trying to geta boy.
And so then he was like, fuck it, will you be my wife?
I'm like, wait, first babyquestion.
And then, fuck it, will you bemy wife?
I'm like, uh, uh, okay, sure,yeah, let's do it, you know.
(05:26):
And so I have, you know I havethe ring and um, you know, he,
he definitely like planned outsomething more formal, like you
know, because I told him I waslike it's there's no need, you
know.
But he said I like he's likehonestly, like I wanted to ask
you more in a formal way.
So he has something veryspecial planned for me.
(05:47):
I don't know when or where, oryou know like when he's going to
do that, but he tells me.
Like you know, just sit tight,it's going to be real special.
So, like, I'm letting him dohis thing, you know, I'm letting
him be the man that he is.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
Yeah, yeah, oh him, do his thing.
You know he, I'm letting him bethe man that he is.
So, yeah, yeah, oh, that's cute.
Um, when I got engaged, uh,that shit fell out of my pocket
and I was like, oh, what do youmean?
Speaker 2 (06:11):
it fell out of your pocket like the ring yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
So I was folding my clothes and it plopped and I was
like, and she was like, what'sthis?
And I'm like, will you marry me?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
that's hilarious.
Did you do that on purpose?
Speaker 1 (06:26):
hell no, I totally fucking forgot.
It was in my pocket man.
She was like oh, what's this?
Because you know, like I don'tlet anyone touch my laundry,
because yeah man, my shit stinksand I don't want anyone to
touch or smell my funk, right,yeah, so, yeah, yeah.
And also folding clothes.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Like I think it's to me it's very therapeutic to fold
my clothes and you know, put itaway, that's for me, and you
are the opposite, because I hatefolding my laundry.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Oh, I love, I love, I hate that there's so much, but
you know, folding it, puttingsocks together, and I have music
on or one of my shows, and I'mlike, oh, I'm good, you know.
So go coming back.
I was holding my clothes, Ifolded my pants and it was just.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
I was like, oh man that's so funny, yeah, but prior
to that.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I did ask you know her dad, if you know I have
permission, or yeah, this iswhat I'm fitting to do.
So it's just the whole nuanceof being romantic and have that
special setting in place.
I'm not going to have thatstory to tell you know my kids
once they start understandingshit.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
So, yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
So I'm happy for you that I mean, yours is like kind
of humorous.
But then there's another, Iguess so there's a part two to
this there's a part two.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
And I told him I was like there's no need you know
I'm I'm fine with how you know,but then for him he's like no,
like it's special to me, like Ifeel like you deserve that.
I want to do this for you.
So I I think that's cute.
I think that's cute too, youknow.
So I'm just like okay, I'll letyou do your thing, you know oh,
definitely, definitely and um,we're gonna switch up.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Uh, you started as modeling first.
Yeah, I remember you in highschool you were like into
modeling and this is like justamateur stuff.
Before you became pro, yeah, Isaid pro and um, and then you
went into singing.
When did this modeling thinglike started popping off for you
, right, when did that pop off?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
you know, I feel like there was.
It was very wavy, right like itcame in out of schemes, um,
just because, like I don't knowwhat it is, I feel like I'm
always just kind of goingthrough something crazy, you
know.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
So like I do?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I do my pauses and and then I get back into it.
I would say so what's yourdefinition of like popping off?
Speaker 1 (08:46):
So meaning like when did you know all these calls,
all these email requests of yousaying, hey, Ashley, I want, I
want to shoot you, Can you be?
Speaker 2 (08:55):
here.
Can you be there when?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
did that started to become consistent in your
schedule, like, oh shit, I havesomething on Friday, oh I have
something on Monday, like thattype of situation.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
I would say it was consistent early on at first.
Like not, definitely not likewhen I first first started.
I would say maybe like a yearbeing into it.
Then I started gettingconsistent and then you know, I
moved to the East Coast.
So then that's when, that.
And then you know I moved tothe East Coast.
So then that's when, that's when, like you know, obviously, like
(09:27):
you know, it's like startingall over again in another you
know, you know area, and thenwhen I came back, I would say,
coming back, it was easy to pickback up because people were
like, oh, my God, you're back,you know.
So then people started hittingme up.
You know, it's like to me Ifeel like the connections here
(09:48):
in the bay area uh, just justfeel like easier, like you know,
than, um, when I was in theeast coast, the east coast was
like it's like so much out there, right, but there's a lot of
opportunity, but gettingconsistent, I felt like I was
chasing a lot more out thereversus here, um, but yeah, I
feel like now I'm getting hit upa lot for both singing and
modeling okay.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
So to caveat off of that singing, when did that
started popping up?
Not popping off, but when didyou started getting serious in
that?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
I'm gonna.
I must say, like maybe a yearand a half ago, that's when I
started like I think I want todo something with this, you know
, like, because I started offwith just recording, you know,
and yeah, because to me being inthe studio.
That's very therapeutic for me,like just just singing and like
just getting in my creativespace, writing.
(10:38):
I love to write like every allthe songs that I've been on and,
um, saying I you know that I'vemade myself, I wrote everything
, so writing is probably theeasiest part about me.
Um, making music I would saymaking maybe melodies is where,
like, I struggle a bit, but, um,I've been doing that for a year
and a half and now I've beengetting hit up a lot for
(11:00):
performances.
I seem to attract, like fashionshows the most out of like all,
like you know, the gigs thatcome across me.
But yeah, so I took a, I didtake a break.
I took a break last Septemberbecause I was kind of grieving
and, as of recent, I think I'mready to like get back into it.
So you'll definitely see moremusic this year.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Oh, hell, yeah, I cannot freaking wait.
And I do love the fact thatyour creative outlet is, you
know, writing in a studio andall this jazz, because that's
how mike, like I've been likecreatively creativity, like man,
I've been creating a lot oflike shit.
(11:43):
Like I've been writing a lot.
Now I'm I'm to the point whereI want it on like, like, say,
film, or like behind the mic andstuff.
And it's like people ask me whyam I doing this now?
And I told him I was like yo, Ithink I've, I've, I've gained
enough experience to like speakmy story or put it out on these,
(12:04):
you know, comedy skits or likethese drama segments and shit,
right?
So yeah, and then also dude Godlike gifted me like this
half-life, right?
So now I want to try ending thelast of my years and shit like
creating, you know, likesomething I really wanted to do.
(12:25):
So I really, I really look upto you for you know saying that
you know, your creativity islike therapeutic, because this
podcast me talking to otherpeople.
That's therapeutic to me,opposed to, you know, playing
basketball in the gym.
So, I'm glad that you found anoutlet for your mental health oh
yeah, a hundred percent,hundred percent yeah it's
(12:48):
important oh oh, definitely,definitely so.
Um, you have kids.
How are the babies, how are thelittle ones?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
oh my goodness.
Um well, one's not so littleanymore.
One's like 14.
I know and I know you have likea whole adult too.
I'm just like, when I see youpost, I'm like I know you have
an adult, I'm like what Iremember when she was a little,
and and then I have afour-year-old and she, she's at
her cute stage, you know.
So the 14, you know, I'm justlike, I'm always just surprised
(13:15):
with her because it's like, ohmy gosh, you're so grown, you
know yeah and, and she's such asweetheart, like, god bless her.
And then, um, my little one,she's four, so she's at her cute
stage where she still has thebaby voice, but, um, she can,
like communicate, so everythingshe says is so freaking cute.
I'm just like you know, likethat's funny.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
oh, I know, I totally understand, uh, totally
understand Kids, oh my.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
God, I hope that I don't get no backlash for the
cute aggression thing.
I never, would never hurt mydaughter, fyi.
But it's just when someone's socute you should not.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Yeah, yeah, no, I understand.
And man fuck that.
Man spank them.
It's tradition.
It's not abuse.
Goddamn they're going.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
It's not tradition, it's not abuse.
God damn, they're gonna learnsomehow, someway.
You know right.
Okay, for the record, I'mhorrible at discipline.
I am horrible at discipline.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Oh man, I'm super big on like disciplining, like I
don't know.
It works for me, so why notwork for the kids, you know?
Speaker 2 (14:17):
I feel like I'm so bad at it I'm so sorry, I need
to find off.
Yeah, no, when I Ew don't dothat, because.
I feel bad they're going tolatch on.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
They're going to latch on and be like you know
what I'm going to make mama cryand that's how I'm going to get
my things back, or my phone back, you know.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
I'm such a cancer bitch.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
Oh my, I'm a cancer too.
So what you crawl into a hey,break down the cancer thing,
like you say, of being a cancerokay, we are nurturing, we're
very protective, so you messwith who we love.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
You messing with us, right?
Um, we're very nurturing.
We're gonna make sure you'reyou're well fed.
We're gonna make sure you'reyou're comfortable.
We're gonna make sure you areloved the right way.
Um what else?
Uh, we I for sure no cancerscan cook.
I don't know what it is.
Every single cancer I've met Ifeel like they all can cook um
what else?
And just like you will never beloved the way that cancer loves
(15:20):
you.
Like, I'm just gonna say thatthat's.
That's my personal opinion, butI really, really think so.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Like okay, now give me um, give me the red flags of
a cancer because I'm crashed.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
The fuck out.
Really, we crash out.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
I'm trying to.
I'm trying to think, I'm tryingto think where, okay, yeah,
you're right, okay, I'll giveyou that.
I'll give you that we crash outlike we get.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
We get when we get pushed to the edge like people.
So people it's like okay.
I literally read, saw this motolike um not that long ago,
where it's like if you don'tstart shit, there won't be no
shit.
But the problem with people isthey like to start shit.
So then they wonder why wecrash out because we don't
fucking play.
Yeah, so like you, piss thecancer off, you better run oh,
(16:09):
so that's like the biggest redflag we just yeah, we're just
crazy.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
We're crazy, we're moody, or maybe I'm just talking
about myself.
I don't know damn.
I don't know about all theother people.
I'm moody, no.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
I agree with the moody Like.
I get into my like little.
I guess my little spurts werefive minutes, I'm like, but then
the next 10 is like, oh, okay Icould do it and then the next
three minutes.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
Yeah, we get over shit hella fast though.
But we also can get mad hellafast, but then we'll get over it
in 10 minutes.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
No but we also hold grudges too.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
I feel like some cancers hold grudges.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Some cancers hold grudges yeah, yeah, just a
little bit, just a little bit.
Yeah, I agree, I agree, just alittle bit just a little bit
okay.
So getting mad right, um, and Idon't know if you're
experiencing this, but I've beenexperiencing like, like I don't
want to say negative comments,but comments like towards me on
(17:07):
social media now because of whatI'm doing right.
So how do you like, becauseyou're a model, you're a singer
and I know like you're getting alot of attention coming your
way, a lot of comments, how doyou filter out like the
negatives, like what's what's agood way of you know?
Do you talk?
(17:27):
Are you like the one?
We're like man, fuck you, dude,you look like a wrinkled french
fry bitch.
Don't even fucking come thisway.
You know, like, do you?
Speaker 2 (17:35):
do that.
You're asking me this because,did you?
I don't know if you saw mystories.
Like two days ago I literallywas like fuck all y'all oh, you
know what I did?
Speaker 1 (17:45):
I did see, I did see your story, but then, prior to
that, I had one saying that, um,because I was talking about
hip-hop on one podcast, andthey're like oh, it's crazy how
someone not black is talkingabout hip-hop.
And I'm like the fuck, likewhat do you mean by that?
Like non-black, like come on,dude, like I've been on this
(18:06):
earth xamune years and I'velistened to a lot of music, why
can't I have my own opinion onhip hop?
Speaker 2 (18:12):
so yeah, that's what?
Speaker 1 (18:13):
yeah, so I had that and then yours came on my feed.
I was like oh shit, let'sfucking talk about it yeah, so
damn your accent changed.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
I hear the Hawaii in you now, but I'm sorry, side
note, side note, side note hellno dog.
Hell, no, sorry, but yeah, goingback to your question, um,
honestly, I'm usually prettygood at kind of just like
reading these comments, likey'all are weird and like I don't
(18:44):
even see the point.
Like I'm really good at justlike kind of ignoring it,
because it does happen to me alot, um, but there's some
moments, like if I'm just likenot having already having, if I
already woke up in a bad mood,and then, especially when the
comments come in waves, whereit's like like a lot at once,
then yeah, then I kind of like Ikind of I do get online and I'm
(19:06):
just like what's the point?
Like what?
Like, like you're not for, likemost of them are usually behind
a fake profile.
I don't know if that happenswith you.
A lot of them are behind a fakeprofile and it's like like what
is it that you're trying toprove right?
But yeah.
I do remind myself, like youhave to just remember that these
people can't even like, say itto you, like themselves with
(19:27):
them, true selves, right.
So like they don't even likewho they are, to where they have
to be someone else, you know.
So if they don't like you, hunjust remember they don't like
themselves, which is really sadoh good so how can, how can what
?
like, like, how can someone likeshare, like affection and love
(19:48):
to other people if they can'teven share for themselves?
And I've always told, I'vealways told people like haters,
like, will express their.
I guess you could say hatersare fans that don't know how to
express their love in a positiveway.
That's all how I always feltlike haters are, are still fans,
they're still a fan of you, butthey just don't know how to
(20:09):
express it in a positive way, sothey only know how to express
it negatively.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
I like that.
I like that Good tips.
And then, how about for peoplethat are starting out, because
you've been in it for like acool minute now You've been in
it Like people that are startingout and they're getting already
like negative backlash.
Do you have any tips for themon like?
Speaker 2 (20:34):
how to keep on going.
Yeah, sorry, my sorry for likealways cutting off so fast, but
um, but yeah, that happens whenyou start out, because people
will look at that and they'regonna just doubt, right, they're
gonna doubt because, like they,they don't have the courage to
start themselves, right?
So it's, it's all it alwayscomes from like an insecurity
(20:55):
within right.
So then, it was like who's thisgirl thinking she can, like
start modeling and singing?
Like you know, like she's notgoing to get anywhere.
And they feel that becausethat's actually what they think
of themselves if they were to bethe ones in that in their shoes
.
So it's all projection if youreally think about it, because
you know they're.
They're just upset that theydidn't have the huevos to go out
(21:16):
and like do it themselves.
So they have to.
They have to make themselvesfeel better by putting everyone
else down.
You know that's the only waythat boosts their own ego.
Like look at me, I'm stayingsafe.
Like she looks hella dumb forstarting out.
You know, like that's their wayof reminding themselves that
they are doing better yeah, oh,that's, that's a good tip.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
Um, I remember when I started this thing, I had a lot
of doubt in myself because Idon't know if people would
listen.
I didn't know if, like, I wouldget the following, which I
didn't care, I didn't care aboutthe following.
But, um, when I first started,I was like super scared because
I didn't know if, like, I wouldget the following, which I
didn't care, I didn't care aboutthe following.
But, um, when I first started,I was like super scared because
I didn't know what the hell Iwas doing.
But, um, uh, I heard this, likesomewhere else.
(22:00):
But you see a big change fromwhen you started to where you
are now.
So, like episode one to episode100 or whatever, you'll see a
big change.
You'll see a lot of peoplethinking, oh man, this cat is
like consistent, like she'sconsistent with their stuff.
It's like, wow, I see thetransition.
(22:21):
And then that's how the haterbecomes the fan.
Because they've gone throughyou know your story that whole
timeline yeah, because they'vegone through, you know your
story that whole timeline, yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
So I think that yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
And it makes them mad .
That would be my tip.
Oh definitely, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
It angers them.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Yeah, because they wanted a piece of them, wished
or hoped like they started itthemselves too.
You know, yeah, right, yeah,because I mean who doesn't want,
like, I guess, another?
Speaker 2 (22:55):
hobby.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
That is not the same as you know him or her or the
third, you know, right, yeah, soI mean, that's a good, that's a
good way of like how I think ofit, yeah, when it comes to, I
guess, uh, starting and likecontinuing, continuing that
journey, so yeah, yeah, I mean,I just I just feel like people
get upset when they just seesomeone actually like succeeding
(23:18):
, and I'm gonna say that'severyone right.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Yeah, we're talking about people that are, if hurt
people hurt people, right, andI'm sure that that's something
that's like overly said.
Yeah, people always say thathurt people, hurt people.
So it's like when they're goingthrough something and it just
it just angers them because theythey, they have the demons in
them and they want to, they wantto experience the light.
I'm not going to say thosepeople are not capable of
(23:42):
healing and getting a differentperspective eventually, but
they're not in the place thatthey they should be, you know.
So that's're not in the placethat they should be you know so
that's why they project the waythey do.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Facts girl Facts.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Question All right, all right.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Fun time now.
Do you watch a lot of cartoonsor do you watch a lot of Disney
movies?
Speaker 2 (24:07):
Yeah, I'd say I've watched quite a few, especially
with having kids.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Okay, and you watched a lot of, like, say, cartoon
movies in the past, current,yeah, yep, alright, let me ask
you this Um, out of all thecartoon guys right, who'd you
smash?
Speaker 2 (24:24):
What?
What kind of question is that?
Speaker 1 (24:28):
That's not even a real like it is a real question
who would you smash as a cartooncharacter, like guy wise,
because I've heard a lot, I'veheard dude.
I'd smash wily coyote because,damn, that motherfucker is smart
and he reminds me of a you know, of a steve jobs with his brain
.
Or I heard, oh man, I would, Iwould fuck Mr Incredible because
(24:49):
, god damn you know.
Or Frozone I've heard Frozone.
So who would you smash as acartoon character?
And mind you, you could turnthem into like a man.
So like say, damn, I'd do Simba, I'd do adult Simba, or I'd do
(25:09):
adult Nala, I ain't adult nala,I ain't gonna fucking, I ain't
gonna walk away from that one.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Yeah, so um uh, damn, this is just gonna be.
This is gonna sound so bad thatwhy this is gonna sound bad,
why I'm picking this, but like Iguess you could say like I'm
into Asians, right, so I'm goingto say what's his fucking name
from?
Mulan.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
The head, not the chief, but the oh God, I don't
know, you know what?
Let's look it up.
Let's look it up.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
I'm like.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Well, I like Asians.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
So, like, if I was to like, I guess, I mean, if I was
to go for anyone, I guess itwould be him.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Mulan huh, okay, okay , let's see.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Mulan's hubby, or whatever.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Li Shang.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Yeah him, there you go.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Him right, okay, okay , okay, li Shang, and he looks
hairless though.
Oh, it's having a lot of bodyhair, is that?
Speaker 2 (26:10):
a turn off.
No, I was just kidding.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
Oh okay, my bad, my bad, it was just an adult and he
looked hairless, you know.
Okay, okay, hairless.
Is that a turn off?
And if that is, why is it aturn off to women?
Speaker 2 (26:32):
It's not a turn off.
I don't think it's a turn off.
If it's a man's hairy, Okay.
If it's overly hairy, maybe.
I don't want to be like I'mtalking about.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Like.
I'm talking about like Likehe's one of them Viking looking
motherfuckers where they arelike hairy, I don't know they
are like hairy, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
I feel like I'll catch fleas or something Like
maybe not.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
Okay, so you'd rather have a clean shaven guy or
someone that has less body hair.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Yeah, I like clean for sure.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
That's you know what Good for you, Because I like
women without a hairy chest too.
Speaker 2 (27:05):
Yeah right, I'm sure that's essential for you, right.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
Oh yeah, definitely, definitely.
You know, I don't want to be,you don't want to be exfoliated.
Yeah, facts, facts, um, for aguy, uh, let me ask you this
this might be some TMI and youcan tell me to pass it.
Um, do you, do you prefer theguy, uh, groomed down there,
opposed to letting it go wild?
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Um, I feel like it can go either way for me,
because sometimes, when theydon't groom it right, it's hella
pokey.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Okay, okay, I can see that, I can see that.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Yeah, I can see that.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
That's when it's like , that's when, like, I guess the
shave is like at a three and itshould be like at a one smooth,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
Yeah, so like.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
When it's pokey, it bothers me, but when it comes to
like appearance wise, I mean aslong as it's out of control.
It's not out of control, it'sfine, you know.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Like a hot damn bush.
It's not like you're going likethis.
You know what I mean.
Then you can't find it likethat.
Yeah, as long as you look forit like this, oh, like right oh,
like, like um, that movie fromscary movie, yeah, yeah, that
episode, oh, that's.
As for men, we like um, we likeit groomed as well.
(28:27):
As long as what you said, we'renot going through it.
You know, it's just like it'sproperly tamed, you know, as
long as it's brand.
Yeah, yeah, exactly Like we'veseen the designs.
What else is there?
There's like so many designs.
Yeah, we really don't care theappearance, and then for guys,
(28:50):
we do get guys, we do get alittle lazy, so we do apologize
ahead of time for not beingready appearance-wise.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
But I tell you this Just turn off the lights, baby.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Oh my, but I mean it still could get tangled through
the hand.
Am I correct?
Like if, let's say, you'regoing down there and it's like
oh, tangle, tangle, tangle.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
I don't think I've ever had to like have.
I don't think I've ever hadthat problem or had to deal with
that.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
So good job, good job .
But if a woman did, how would awoman handle that?
Let's say, the hand's goingdown and your hand just gets a
little bit caught because it'sstuck between hair, how would
you handle that?
That's a scenario.
How would you handle like, ohoops.
And then you hear the guy go,oh, like if you cause, you know,
(29:46):
when you pull it you're like,oh shit.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
I would probably be like do you should we go to the
bathroom and like condition it?
Speaker 1 (30:05):
they should be conditioned I don't know, that
was my first thought, like let'sfix it, like I can help you.
Would that still keep the moodgoing in the room After?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
the conditioning.
Oh yeah, trust me, I'm like onand off switch.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Ah, okay, Because I would think that it would be
like okay, um, let's take fiveand get ourselves, you know,
let's get ourselves togetheragain and let's try again.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
That's how I would see it panning out in my head
yeah, that's fine.
Yeah, okay, whenever you'reready.
No pressure, no pressure.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
It's like it's okay, it's okay.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
It's okay To your comfortability.
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Oh, that is so funny, told you, it'll go crazy, it'll
go crazy.
And then, so funny, told you,it'll go crazy, it'll go crazy.
And then what else?
Um, oh, do you have anyquestions for me before I go
into one of the questions thatwas asked or a comment that was
asked on your, uh, on your post?
Speaker 2 (31:00):
um no, I mean, I feel like I always I kind of like
ping pong with you, you know soyeah I'll let you know when it
comes up oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
Okay, let me um, let me find your section of the hot
damn thing.
Okay, uh so there wascommenters wanting to ask me
something of course, of course,um, oh, okay, um, what's more
important, solitude or isolation?
Solitude this is not.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Is that not the same thing?
Speaker 1 (31:36):
isolation.
So this is coming from acollege kid.
Um, in my opinion, I thinksolitude is that you're at peace
, being by yourself.
Speaker 2 (31:47):
Oh, I'm sorry, I was thinking of another word.
I'm sorry, yeah, sorry, no,okay, sorry.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Got it.
You got it, girl, I got it, Igot it Okay.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
Solitude, okay, solitude or isolation what's
more important?
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Yeah, or like solitude versus isolation.
Speaker 2 (32:06):
I feel like isolation is never good.
I mean, like you can isolate toa certain extent, right.
So like too much of anything isbad, finding peace.
Sometimes you might have toisolate in order to find
solitude, but, like I said, Ifeel like too much of isolation
(32:27):
is never good and finding peacelike that's 100% like our goal
right here in life.
Yeah, just finding peace withinyourself, peace within your
family, peace within yourrelationships and everything.
So I think they both tietogether, but just not too much
of isolation 100%, because it'snever good.
(32:47):
You have to be out there andhave your connections with the
world and people, because that'sthe way that you, I feel like
you keep this healthy.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Oh, 100%.
What I took away from that istake your broken pieces and make
it back into peace, as inP-E-C-E.
Yeah, so that's a real good,mature answer, miss Ashley.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
Oh, thank you.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
Good one, good one.
Okay so the argument of a sidepiece right.
So side pieces right.
Do you think, let's say andthis goes for both male and
(33:42):
female, and this is the lastquestion Do you think the side
piece gets the better version ofthe person?
So let's say, you know you hada side piece man, right?
I'll say me that I have a sidepiece chick.
Do you think that the sidepiece chick is getting the best
version of me, opposed to therelationship that I'm in?
(34:04):
So, with your question, so toyou, your side piece man, do you
think that he's getting thebest version of you or, like in
reverse, he's getting the best,yeah.
Speaker 2 (34:16):
So like if I was to have my main and a side piece
for the record I don't even knowwhat that's like because I've
never been in that buthypothetically, if I was to have
a side piece, hypothetically,hypothetically, I know I was
thinking I was likehypothetically, hypothetically.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
I know I was thinking .
I was like did she just come up, make up a word?
I'm going to let her roll withit.
I ain't even going to saynothing, but I'm going to roll
with it.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
I caught myself Hypothetically if I had, I guess
, a main dude and a side piece.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
I don't.
I mean, mean I don't think thatthe side piece would get the
best version of me, I mean I'mnot even capable of doing that,
I don't know.
But, um, because to me I'mgonna say this it's gonna be all
within perspective what youvalue, what you value in a
relationship.
Because you have to rememberthat people value different
things.
So so many people will be likeoh you know, she's wrong for
(35:18):
being a gold digger, she's wrongfor expecting these types of
things in a relationship.
And, in my opinion, everyone'sperspectives and expectations
and standards are all different.
So I don't think there's a rightor wrong way of having a type
of you know need in arelationship.
So, going back to your question, it's going to be out of
(35:39):
perspective.
So the best version of me, likeyou know, to someone, if I was
their side piece, could be likeknow, um, their best version
versus you know what I give tomy main man and that's could
still be his best version too.
Right, because what if a guydoesn't even want all of me?
What if he doesn't want mycommitment?
(36:01):
What if he doesn't wantanything but just you?
know the booty yeah, and so thatcould be the best side of me in
his opinion.
And then to you know the personthat I'm committed to and they
value just like commitment,loyalty, love.
You know all of that, so in hiseyes that might be the best
(36:21):
version.
So to me it's kind of a hardquestion to.
I don't know if I answered thatright.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
No, you did.
You gave your introspect onthat.
So again, thank you, girl.
That was fun.
Do you have any questions forme, or do you have any
shout-outs, or where can thesepeople find you at?
Speaker 2 (36:47):
So you can find me on Instagram, aaaabbott A-B-B-O
abbott um.
I'm also on youtube, ashleyabbott.
You can search for my musicthere too, and on spotify, um,
so you can look.
You can search up intentions,ethereal love, zodiac, lust.
You're gonna see all my musicon there.
Um, I hope you guys give alisten.
I'm gonna shout out to you,chris omelette, uh for for
(37:08):
having me on this show.
Thank you so much for your timeand for even considering
interviewing me.
I want to shout out to all myfriends and family because if it
wasn't for all my close ones, Idon't know where I'd be today
Just all the support that I get.
And shout out to my kids,because they're really my motive
.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
Well freaking said, miss Ashley.
Well freaking said, excuse me,um.
Shout out to KO Studios.
Thank you for the lovely home.
Shout out to Raffy Bite.
Thank you for the lovely beat.
My man, and with that I'm Chrisand I'm Ashley Abbott good, hey
, thank you, and we out thisbitch peace.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1, remember my marrow.
Welcome back to another episodeof the Relationship Method
Podcast.
I'm Chris, and today I have avery special guest one of my
homegirls from back home.
She's a mom, she's a model, sheworks for a living too.
She's also a hot damn singer,and a pretty damn good one.
(00:31):
Yo give it up for Miss AshleyAbbott.
Yay, hey, Happy New Year.
Oh hell, no, no.
Thank you for coming along andjoining me, me on this lovely uh
podcast day of course hell yeah, ask before I uh.
Before we get into it, let meask you how did I get the yes
(00:55):
from you?
Speaker 2 (00:57):
I mean, we're just.
We were always tight back inthe day, so it was an automatic.
Yes, you know like we startedoff with dancing choreography
together and yeah, yeah, we, wewere dancing together.
I don't know if you rememberthat, but I do remember it so
long ago.
You know so, and we even hadlike these little nicknames for
each other, like omelet and star.
I don't even know how thathappened, but that happened it
(01:20):
just stuck, it just stuck yeahand then you said dancing.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
We were in um.
Was it Francine's studio inMarina?
Speaker 2 (01:28):
I remember it was with J-Boy, it was.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
J, yeah, yeah, so it was rhythmic flow you were a
part of rhythmic flow.
Yes, you were a part of thatfor a cool minute.
So yeah, oh, fucking memories,man, yeah, memories man yeah but
yeah, hell yeah.
So that's how I got the yes.
So, ash, like, how's your weekbeen, how's your day going?
Speaker 2 (01:53):
my week has been actually kind of crazy, and
that's because I'm ready to drumroll vacation.
Where are you going?
I'm going to Cancun oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Okay, how long are you going to be out there for?
5 days, 4 nights you're goingto get full, full fat.
Oh my gosh, and freaking tipsy,are you going with um, with
(02:27):
your mans, with your girls, withyour team?
Who you?
Speaker 2 (02:30):
going.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I'm definitely going with my man, so uh-huh with your
mans, with my okay, so thatthat that x'd out the question
of you being single or not.
So she's taken y'all, sorry,sorry, boo, freaking boo.
And then with your mans, likehow long you been with your mans
(02:51):
for?
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I'd say we were, because it was a very
interesting like transition withhim.
It was so, I would say, gettingto know and dating and
everything.
A total of two years.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Oh nice.
And you said what getting?
To know and dating andeverything, uh a total of two
years, oh nice.
And you said what getting toknow and dating?
Speaker 2 (03:09):
so simultaneously you were uh dating and getting to
know him yeah, like, like, yeah,like, I wanted to take things
slow, you know that's good yeah,yeah just so, I don't know.
I feel like I've beentraumatized in the past so you
know like yeah, yeah this time Igotta make sure you know, take
(03:29):
it slow.
And he agreed to like.
It's one of those things where,like, it was like a mutual
respect thing for each other, soit worked out oh, that's real
good.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
I'm very happy for you.
Um, could this guy be?
Is it too early to say like theone, or is you guys are still
working in that stage?
Speaker 2 (03:49):
that honeymoon stage honeymoon phase well, I guess,
since you're asking, we recentlyjust got engaged like
congratulations man I haven'tannounced it yet, but I feel
like by the time this, thisvideo comes out, it's gonna be
announced, because I'mannouncing it next week.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's going to.
You're going to come out beforethis one.
Yeah, oh, but fuck manCongratulations.
I know right, I'm engaged.
Oh girl, Congratulations.
How did it happen?
Well, give me the setting.
Um, okay, it's good, it's oneof them.
(04:34):
Sorry, I got you it's gonna beone of them stories, all right
okay, I can tell you how ithappened.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
honestly, it was sweet.
The way it happened was verysweet.
Um, he, he, we were, we werejust in a very intimate setting
and you know, he did start offwith asking me like, oh, you
know, like you would have likekids with me and stuff.
And I'm like, yeah, if you wanta baby, I'd give you a baby.
You know, I think men just kindof get like, um, they worry, oh
(05:03):
, I've already have kids, solike, maybe she's done right.
And and then I was like, no, ifyou really want a baby, I'll
give you a baby.
Like I want, I want another onetoo.
Anyways, like I'm trying to geta boy.
And so then he was like, fuck it, will you be my wife?
I'm like, wait, first babyquestion.
And then, fuck it, will you bemy wife?
I'm like, uh, uh, okay, sure,yeah, let's do it, you know.
(05:26):
And so I have, you know I havethe ring and um, you know, he,
he definitely like planned outsomething more formal, like you
know, because I told him I waslike it's there's no need, you
know.
But he said I like he's likehonestly, like I wanted to ask
you more in a formal way.
So he has something veryspecial planned for me.
(05:47):
I don't know when or where, oryou know like when he's going to
do that, but he tells me.
Like you know, just sit tight,it's going to be real special.
So, like, I'm letting him dohis thing, you know, I'm letting
him be the man that he is.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
Yeah, yeah, oh him, do his thing.
You know he, I'm letting him bethe man that he is.
So, yeah, yeah, oh, that's cute.
Um, when I got engaged, uh,that shit fell out of my pocket
and I was like, oh, what do youmean?
Speaker 2 (06:11):
it fell out of your pocket like the ring yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
So I was folding my clothes and it plopped and I was
like, and she was like, what'sthis?
And I'm like, will you marry me?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
that's hilarious.
Did you do that on purpose?
Speaker 1 (06:26):
hell no, I totally fucking forgot.
It was in my pocket man.
She was like oh, what's this?
Because you know, like I don'tlet anyone touch my laundry,
because yeah man, my shit stinksand I don't want anyone to
touch or smell my funk, right,yeah, so, yeah, yeah.
And also folding clothes.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Like I think it's to me it's very therapeutic to fold
my clothes and you know, put itaway, that's for me, and you
are the opposite, because I hatefolding my laundry.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Oh, I love, I love, I hate that there's so much, but
you know, folding it, puttingsocks together, and I have music
on or one of my shows, and I'mlike, oh, I'm good, you know.
So go coming back.
I was holding my clothes, Ifolded my pants and it was just.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
I was like, oh man that's so funny, yeah, but prior
to that.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I did ask you know her dad, if you know I have
permission, or yeah, this iswhat I'm fitting to do.
So it's just the whole nuanceof being romantic and have that
special setting in place.
I'm not going to have thatstory to tell you know my kids
once they start understandingshit.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
So, yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
So I'm happy for you that I mean, yours is like kind
of humorous.
But then there's another, Iguess so there's a part two to
this there's a part two.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
And I told him I was like there's no need you know
I'm I'm fine with how you know,but then for him he's like no,
like it's special to me, like Ifeel like you deserve that.
I want to do this for you.
So I I think that's cute.
I think that's cute too, youknow.
So I'm just like okay, I'll letyou do your thing, you know oh,
definitely, definitely and um,we're gonna switch up.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Uh, you started as modeling first.
Yeah, I remember you in highschool you were like into
modeling and this is like justamateur stuff.
Before you became pro, yeah, Isaid pro and um, and then you
went into singing.
When did this modeling thinglike started popping off for you
, right, when did that pop off?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
you know, I feel like there was.
It was very wavy, right like itcame in out of schemes, um,
just because, like I don't knowwhat it is, I feel like I'm
always just kind of goingthrough something crazy, you
know.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
So like I do?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I do my pauses and and then I get back into it.
I would say so what's yourdefinition of like popping off?
Speaker 1 (08:46):
So meaning like when did you know all these calls,
all these email requests of yousaying, hey, Ashley, I want, I
want to shoot you, Can you be?
Speaker 2 (08:55):
here.
Can you be there when?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
did that started to become consistent in your
schedule, like, oh shit, I havesomething on Friday, oh I have
something on Monday, like thattype of situation.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
I would say it was consistent early on at first.
Like not, definitely not likewhen I first first started.
I would say maybe like a yearbeing into it.
Then I started gettingconsistent and then you know, I
moved to the East Coast.
So then that's when, that.
And then you know I moved tothe East Coast.
So then that's when, that's when, like you know, obviously, like
(09:27):
you know, it's like startingall over again in another you
know, you know area, and thenwhen I came back, I would say,
coming back, it was easy to pickback up because people were
like, oh, my God, you're back,you know.
So then people started hittingme up.
You know, it's like to me Ifeel like the connections here
(09:48):
in the bay area uh, just justfeel like easier, like you know,
than, um, when I was in theeast coast, the east coast was
like it's like so much out there, right, but there's a lot of
opportunity, but gettingconsistent, I felt like I was
chasing a lot more out thereversus here, um, but yeah, I
feel like now I'm getting hit upa lot for both singing and
modeling okay.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
So to caveat off of that singing, when did that
started popping up?
Not popping off, but when didyou started getting serious in
that?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
I'm gonna.
I must say, like maybe a yearand a half ago, that's when I
started like I think I want todo something with this, you know
, like, because I started offwith just recording, you know,
and yeah, because to me being inthe studio.
That's very therapeutic for me,like just just singing and like
just getting in my creativespace, writing.
(10:38):
I love to write like every allthe songs that I've been on and,
um, saying I you know that I'vemade myself, I wrote everything
, so writing is probably theeasiest part about me.
Um, making music I would saymaking maybe melodies is where,
like, I struggle a bit, but, um,I've been doing that for a year
and a half and now I've beengetting hit up a lot for
(11:00):
performances.
I seem to attract, like fashionshows the most out of like all,
like you know, the gigs thatcome across me.
But yeah, so I took a, I didtake a break.
I took a break last Septemberbecause I was kind of grieving
and, as of recent, I think I'mready to like get back into it.
So you'll definitely see moremusic this year.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Oh, hell, yeah, I cannot freaking wait.
And I do love the fact thatyour creative outlet is, you
know, writing in a studio andall this jazz, because that's
how mike, like I've been likecreatively creativity, like man,
I've been creating a lot oflike shit.
(11:43):
Like I've been writing a lot.
Now I'm I'm to the point whereI want it on like, like, say,
film, or like behind the mic andstuff.
And it's like people ask me whyam I doing this now?
And I told him I was like yo, Ithink I've, I've, I've gained
enough experience to like speakmy story or put it out on these,
(12:04):
you know, comedy skits or likethese drama segments and shit,
right?
So yeah, and then also dude Godlike gifted me like this
half-life, right?
So now I want to try ending thelast of my years and shit like
creating, you know, likesomething I really wanted to do.
(12:25):
So I really, I really look upto you for you know saying that
you know, your creativity islike therapeutic, because this
podcast me talking to otherpeople.
That's therapeutic to me,opposed to, you know, playing
basketball in the gym.
So, I'm glad that you found anoutlet for your mental health oh
yeah, a hundred percent,hundred percent yeah it's
(12:48):
important oh oh, definitely,definitely so.
Um, you have kids.
How are the babies, how are thelittle ones?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
oh my goodness.
Um well, one's not so littleanymore.
One's like 14.
I know and I know you have likea whole adult too.
I'm just like, when I see youpost, I'm like I know you have
an adult, I'm like what Iremember when she was a little,
and and then I have afour-year-old and she, she's at
her cute stage, you know.
So the 14, you know, I'm justlike, I'm always just surprised
(13:15):
with her because it's like, ohmy gosh, you're so grown, you
know yeah and, and she's such asweetheart, like, god bless her.
And then, um, my little one,she's four, so she's at her cute
stage where she still has thebaby voice, but, um, she can,
like communicate, so everythingshe says is so freaking cute.
I'm just like you know, likethat's funny.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
oh, I know, I totally understand, uh, totally
understand Kids, oh my.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
God, I hope that I don't get no backlash for the
cute aggression thing.
I never, would never hurt mydaughter, fyi.
But it's just when someone's socute you should not.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Yeah, yeah, no, I understand.
And man fuck that.
Man spank them.
It's tradition.
It's not abuse.
Goddamn they're going.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
It's not tradition, it's not abuse.
God damn, they're gonna learnsomehow, someway.
You know right.
Okay, for the record, I'mhorrible at discipline.
I am horrible at discipline.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
Oh man, I'm super big on like disciplining, like I
don't know.
It works for me, so why notwork for the kids, you know?
Speaker 2 (14:17):
I feel like I'm so bad at it I'm so sorry, I need
to find off.
Yeah, no, when I Ew don't dothat, because.
I feel bad they're going tolatch on.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
They're going to latch on and be like you know
what I'm going to make mama cryand that's how I'm going to get
my things back, or my phone back, you know.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
I'm such a cancer bitch.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
Oh my, I'm a cancer too.
So what you crawl into a hey,break down the cancer thing,
like you say, of being a cancerokay, we are nurturing, we're
very protective, so you messwith who we love.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
You messing with us, right?
Um, we're very nurturing.
We're gonna make sure you'reyou're well fed.
We're gonna make sure you'reyou're comfortable.
We're gonna make sure you areloved the right way.
Um what else?
Uh, we I for sure no cancerscan cook.
I don't know what it is.
Every single cancer I've met Ifeel like they all can cook um
what else?
And just like you will never beloved the way that cancer loves
(15:20):
you.
Like, I'm just gonna say thatthat's.
That's my personal opinion, butI really, really think so.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Like okay, now give me um, give me the red flags of
a cancer because I'm crashed.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
The fuck out.
Really, we crash out.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
I'm trying to.
I'm trying to think, I'm tryingto think where, okay, yeah,
you're right, okay, I'll giveyou that.
I'll give you that we crash outlike we get.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
We get when we get pushed to the edge like people.
So people it's like okay.
I literally read, saw this motolike um not that long ago,
where it's like if you don'tstart shit, there won't be no
shit.
But the problem with people isthey like to start shit.
So then they wonder why wecrash out because we don't
fucking play.
Yeah, so like you, piss thecancer off, you better run oh,
(16:09):
so that's like the biggest redflag we just yeah, we're just
crazy.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
We're crazy, we're moody, or maybe I'm just talking
about myself.
I don't know damn.
I don't know about all theother people.
I'm moody, no.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
I agree with the moody Like.
I get into my like little.
I guess my little spurts werefive minutes, I'm like, but then
the next 10 is like, oh, okay Icould do it and then the next
three minutes.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
Yeah, we get over shit hella fast though.
But we also can get mad hellafast, but then we'll get over it
in 10 minutes.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
No but we also hold grudges too.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
I feel like some cancers hold grudges.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
Some cancers hold grudges yeah, yeah, just a
little bit, just a little bit.
Yeah, I agree, I agree, just alittle bit just a little bit
okay.
So getting mad right, um, and Idon't know if you're
experiencing this, but I've beenexperiencing like, like I don't
want to say negative comments,but comments like towards me on
(17:07):
social media now because of whatI'm doing right.
So how do you like, becauseyou're a model, you're a singer
and I know like you're getting alot of attention coming your
way, a lot of comments, how doyou filter out like the
negatives, like what's what's agood way of you know?
Do you talk?
(17:27):
Are you like the one?
We're like man, fuck you, dude,you look like a wrinkled french
fry bitch.
Don't even fucking come thisway.
You know, like, do you?
Speaker 2 (17:35):
do that.
You're asking me this because,did you?
I don't know if you saw mystories.
Like two days ago I literallywas like fuck all y'all oh, you
know what I did?
Speaker 1 (17:45):
I did see, I did see your story, but then, prior to
that, I had one saying that, um,because I was talking about
hip-hop on one podcast, andthey're like oh, it's crazy how
someone not black is talkingabout hip-hop.
And I'm like the fuck, likewhat do you mean by that?
Like non-black, like come on,dude, like I've been on this
(18:06):
earth xamune years and I'velistened to a lot of music, why
can't I have my own opinion onhip hop?
Speaker 2 (18:12):
so yeah, that's what?
Speaker 1 (18:13):
yeah, so I had that and then yours came on my feed.
I was like oh shit, let'sfucking talk about it yeah, so
damn your accent changed.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
I hear the Hawaii in you now, but I'm sorry, side
note, side note, side note hellno dog.
Hell, no, sorry, but yeah, goingback to your question, um,
honestly, I'm usually prettygood at kind of just like
reading these comments, likey'all are weird and like I don't
(18:44):
even see the point.
Like I'm really good at justlike kind of ignoring it,
because it does happen to me alot, um, but there's some
moments, like if I'm just likenot having already having, if I
already woke up in a bad mood,and then, especially when the
comments come in waves, whereit's like like a lot at once,
then yeah, then I kind of like Ikind of I do get online and I'm
(19:06):
just like what's the point?
Like what?
Like, like you're not for, likemost of them are usually behind
a fake profile.
I don't know if that happenswith you.
A lot of them are behind a fakeprofile and it's like like what
is it that you're trying toprove right?
But yeah.
I do remind myself, like youhave to just remember that these
people can't even like, say itto you, like themselves with
(19:27):
them, true selves, right.
So like they don't even likewho they are, to where they have
to be someone else, you know.
So if they don't like you, hunjust remember they don't like
themselves, which is really sadoh good so how can, how can what
?
like, like, how can someone likeshare, like affection and love
(19:48):
to other people if they can'teven share for themselves?
And I've always told, I'vealways told people like haters,
like, will express their.
I guess you could say hatersare fans that don't know how to
express their love in a positiveway.
That's all how I always feltlike haters are, are still fans,
they're still a fan of you, butthey just don't know how to
(20:09):
express it in a positive way, sothey only know how to express
it negatively.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
I like that.
I like that Good tips.
And then, how about for peoplethat are starting out, because
you've been in it for like acool minute now You've been in
it Like people that are startingout and they're getting already
like negative backlash.
Do you have any tips for themon like?
Speaker 2 (20:34):
how to keep on going.
Yeah, sorry, my sorry for likealways cutting off so fast, but
um, but yeah, that happens whenyou start out, because people
will look at that and they'regonna just doubt, right, they're
gonna doubt because, like they,they don't have the courage to
start themselves, right?
So it's, it's all it alwayscomes from like an insecurity
(20:55):
within right.
So then, it was like who's thisgirl thinking she can, like
start modeling and singing?
Like you know, like she's notgoing to get anywhere.
And they feel that becausethat's actually what they think
of themselves if they were to bethe ones in that in their shoes
.
So it's all projection if youreally think about it, because
you know they're.
They're just upset that theydidn't have the huevos to go out
(21:16):
and like do it themselves.
So they have to.
They have to make themselvesfeel better by putting everyone
else down.
You know that's the only waythat boosts their own ego.
Like look at me, I'm stayingsafe.
Like she looks hella dumb forstarting out.
You know, like that's their wayof reminding themselves that
they are doing better yeah, oh,that's, that's a good tip.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
Um, I remember when I started this thing, I had a lot
of doubt in myself because Idon't know if people would
listen.
I didn't know if, like, I wouldget the following, which I
didn't care, I didn't care aboutthe following.
But, um, when I first started,I was like super scared because
I didn't know if, like, I wouldget the following, which I
didn't care, I didn't care aboutthe following.
But, um, when I first started,I was like super scared because
I didn't know what the hell Iwas doing.
But, um, uh, I heard this, likesomewhere else.
(22:00):
But you see a big change fromwhen you started to where you
are now.
So, like episode one to episode100 or whatever, you'll see a
big change.
You'll see a lot of peoplethinking, oh man, this cat is
like consistent, like she'sconsistent with their stuff.
It's like, wow, I see thetransition.
(22:21):
And then that's how the haterbecomes the fan.
Because they've gone throughyou know your story that whole
timeline yeah, because they'vegone through, you know your
story that whole timeline, yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:31):
So I think that yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
And it makes them mad .
That would be my tip.
Oh definitely, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
It angers them.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Yeah, because they wanted a piece of them, wished
or hoped like they started itthemselves too.
You know, yeah, right, yeah,because I mean who doesn't want,
like, I guess, another?
Speaker 2 (22:55):
hobby.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
That is not the same as you know him or her or the
third, you know, right, yeah, soI mean, that's a good, that's a
good way of like how I think ofit, yeah, when it comes to, I
guess, uh, starting and likecontinuing, continuing that
journey, so yeah, yeah, I mean,I just I just feel like people
get upset when they just seesomeone actually like succeeding
(23:18):
, and I'm gonna say that'severyone right.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Yeah, we're talking about people that are, if hurt
people hurt people, right, andI'm sure that that's something
that's like overly said.
Yeah, people always say thathurt people, hurt people.
So it's like when they're goingthrough something and it just
it just angers them because theythey, they have the demons in
them and they want to, they wantto experience the light.
I'm not going to say thosepeople are not capable of
(23:42):
healing and getting a differentperspective eventually, but
they're not in the place thatthey they should be, you know.
So that's're not in the placethat they should be you know so
that's why they project the waythey do.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Facts girl Facts.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Question All right, all right.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Fun time now.
Do you watch a lot of cartoonsor do you watch a lot of Disney
movies?
Speaker 2 (24:07):
Yeah, I'd say I've watched quite a few, especially
with having kids.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Okay, and you watched a lot of, like, say, cartoon
movies in the past, current,yeah, yep, alright, let me ask
you this Um, out of all thecartoon guys right, who'd you
smash?
Speaker 2 (24:24):
What?
What kind of question is that?
Speaker 1 (24:28):
That's not even a real like it is a real question
who would you smash as a cartooncharacter, like guy wise,
because I've heard a lot, I'veheard dude.
I'd smash wily coyote because,damn, that motherfucker is smart
and he reminds me of a you know, of a steve jobs with his brain
.
Or I heard, oh man, I would, Iwould fuck Mr Incredible because
(24:49):
, god damn you know.
Or Frozone I've heard Frozone.
So who would you smash as acartoon character?
And mind you, you could turnthem into like a man.
So like say, damn, I'd do Simba, I'd do adult Simba, or I'd do
(25:09):
adult Nala, I ain't adult nala,I ain't gonna fucking, I ain't
gonna walk away from that one.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Yeah, so um uh, damn, this is just gonna be.
This is gonna sound so bad thatwhy this is gonna sound bad,
why I'm picking this, but like Iguess you could say like I'm
into Asians, right, so I'm goingto say what's his fucking name
from?
Mulan.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
The head, not the chief, but the oh God, I don't
know, you know what?
Let's look it up.
Let's look it up.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
I'm like.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Well, I like Asians.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
So, like, if I was to like, I guess, I mean, if I was
to go for anyone, I guess itwould be him.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Mulan huh, okay, okay , let's see.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Mulan's hubby, or whatever.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Li Shang.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Yeah him, there you go.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Him right, okay, okay , okay, li Shang, and he looks
hairless though.
Oh, it's having a lot of bodyhair, is that?
Speaker 2 (26:10):
a turn off.
No, I was just kidding.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
Oh okay, my bad, my bad, it was just an adult and he
looked hairless, you know.
Okay, okay, hairless.
Is that a turn off?
And if that is, why is it aturn off to women?
Speaker 2 (26:32):
It's not a turn off.
I don't think it's a turn off.
If it's a man's hairy, Okay.
If it's overly hairy, maybe.
I don't want to be like I'mtalking about.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Like.
I'm talking about like Likehe's one of them Viking looking
motherfuckers where they arelike hairy, I don't know they
are like hairy, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
I feel like I'll catch fleas or something Like
maybe not.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
Okay, so you'd rather have a clean shaven guy or
someone that has less body hair.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Yeah, I like clean for sure.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
That's you know what Good for you, Because I like
women without a hairy chest too.
Speaker 2 (27:05):
Yeah right, I'm sure that's essential for you, right.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
Oh yeah, definitely, definitely.
You know, I don't want to be,you don't want to be exfoliated.
Yeah, facts, facts, um, for aguy, uh, let me ask you this
this might be some TMI and youcan tell me to pass it.
Um, do you, do you prefer theguy, uh, groomed down there,
opposed to letting it go wild?
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Um, I feel like it can go either way for me,
because sometimes, when theydon't groom it right, it's hella
pokey.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Okay, okay, I can see that, I can see that.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Yeah, I can see that.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
That's when it's like , that's when, like, I guess the
shave is like at a three and itshould be like at a one smooth,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
Yeah, so like.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
When it's pokey, it bothers me, but when it comes to
like appearance wise, I mean aslong as it's out of control.
It's not out of control, it'sfine, you know.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Like a hot damn bush.
It's not like you're going likethis.
You know what I mean.
Then you can't find it likethat.
Yeah, as long as you look forit like this, oh, like right oh,
like, like um, that movie fromscary movie, yeah, yeah, that
episode, oh, that's.
As for men, we like um, we likeit groomed as well.
(28:27):
As long as what you said, we'renot going through it.
You know, it's just like it'sproperly tamed, you know, as
long as it's brand.
Yeah, yeah, exactly Like we'veseen the designs.
What else is there?
There's like so many designs.
Yeah, we really don't care theappearance, and then for guys,
(28:50):
we do get guys, we do get alittle lazy, so we do apologize
ahead of time for not beingready appearance-wise.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
But I tell you this Just turn off the lights, baby.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Oh my, but I mean it still could get tangled through
the hand.
Am I correct?
Like if, let's say, you'regoing down there and it's like
oh, tangle, tangle, tangle.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
I don't think I've ever had to like have.
I don't think I've ever hadthat problem or had to deal with
that.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
So good job, good job .
But if a woman did, how would awoman handle that?
Let's say, the hand's goingdown and your hand just gets a
little bit caught because it'sstuck between hair, how would
you handle that?
That's a scenario.
How would you handle like, ohoops.
And then you hear the guy go,oh, like if you cause, you know,
(29:46):
when you pull it you're like,oh shit.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
I would probably be like do you should we go to the
bathroom and like condition it?
Speaker 1 (30:05):
they should be conditioned I don't know, that
was my first thought, like let'sfix it, like I can help you.
Would that still keep the moodgoing in the room After?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
the conditioning.
Oh yeah, trust me, I'm like onand off switch.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Ah, okay, Because I would think that it would be
like okay, um, let's take fiveand get ourselves, you know,
let's get ourselves togetheragain and let's try again.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
That's how I would see it panning out in my head
yeah, that's fine.
Yeah, okay, whenever you'reready.
No pressure, no pressure.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
It's like it's okay, it's okay.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
It's okay To your comfortability.
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Oh, that is so funny, told you, it'll go crazy, it'll
go crazy.
And then, so funny, told you,it'll go crazy, it'll go crazy.
And then what else?
Um, oh, do you have anyquestions for me before I go
into one of the questions thatwas asked or a comment that was
asked on your, uh, on your post?
Speaker 2 (31:00):
um no, I mean, I feel like I always I kind of like
ping pong with you, you know soyeah I'll let you know when it
comes up oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
Okay, let me um, let me find your section of the hot
damn thing.
Okay, uh so there wascommenters wanting to ask me
something of course, of course,um, oh, okay, um, what's more
important, solitude or isolation?
Solitude this is not.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Is that not the same thing?
Speaker 1 (31:36):
isolation.
So this is coming from acollege kid.
Um, in my opinion, I thinksolitude is that you're at peace
, being by yourself.
Speaker 2 (31:47):
Oh, I'm sorry, I was thinking of another word.
I'm sorry, yeah, sorry, no,okay, sorry.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Got it.
You got it, girl, I got it, Igot it Okay.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
Solitude, okay, solitude or isolation what's
more important?
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Yeah, or like solitude versus isolation.
Speaker 2 (32:06):
I feel like isolation is never good.
I mean, like you can isolate toa certain extent, right.
So like too much of anything isbad, finding peace.
Sometimes you might have toisolate in order to find
solitude, but, like I said, Ifeel like too much of isolation
(32:27):
is never good and finding peacelike that's 100% like our goal
right here in life.
Yeah, just finding peace withinyourself, peace within your
family, peace within yourrelationships and everything.
So I think they both tietogether, but just not too much
of isolation 100%, because it'snever good.
(32:47):
You have to be out there andhave your connections with the
world and people, because that'sthe way that you, I feel like
you keep this healthy.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Oh, 100%.
What I took away from that istake your broken pieces and make
it back into peace, as inP-E-C-E.
Yeah, so that's a real good,mature answer, miss Ashley.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
Oh, thank you.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
Good one, good one.
Okay so the argument of a sidepiece right.
So side pieces right.
Do you think, let's say andthis goes for both male and
(33:42):
female, and this is the lastquestion Do you think the side
piece gets the better version ofthe person?
So let's say, you know you hada side piece man, right?
I'll say me that I have a sidepiece chick.
Do you think that the sidepiece chick is getting the best
version of me, opposed to therelationship that I'm in?
(34:04):
So, with your question, so toyou, your side piece man, do you
think that he's getting thebest version of you or, like in
reverse, he's getting the best,yeah.
Speaker 2 (34:16):
So like if I was to have my main and a side piece
for the record I don't even knowwhat that's like because I've
never been in that buthypothetically, if I was to have
a side piece, hypothetically,hypothetically, I know I was
thinking I was likehypothetically, hypothetically.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
I know I was thinking .
I was like did she just come up, make up a word?
I'm going to let her roll withit.
I ain't even going to saynothing, but I'm going to roll
with it.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
I caught myself Hypothetically if I had, I guess
, a main dude and a side piece.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
I don't.
I mean, mean I don't think thatthe side piece would get the
best version of me, I mean I'mnot even capable of doing that,
I don't know.
But, um, because to me I'mgonna say this it's gonna be all
within perspective what youvalue, what you value in a
relationship.
Because you have to rememberthat people value different
things.
So so many people will be likeoh you know, she's wrong for
(35:18):
being a gold digger, she's wrongfor expecting these types of
things in a relationship.
And, in my opinion, everyone'sperspectives and expectations
and standards are all different.
So I don't think there's a rightor wrong way of having a type
of you know need in arelationship.
So, going back to your question, it's going to be out of
(35:39):
perspective.
So the best version of me, likeyou know, to someone, if I was
their side piece, could be likeknow, um, their best version
versus you know what I give tomy main man and that's could
still be his best version too.
Right, because what if a guydoesn't even want all of me?
What if he doesn't want mycommitment?
(36:01):
What if he doesn't wantanything but just you?
know the booty yeah, and so thatcould be the best side of me in
his opinion.
And then to you know the personthat I'm committed to and they
value just like commitment,loyalty, love.
You know all of that, so in hiseyes that might be the best
(36:21):
version.
So to me it's kind of a hardquestion to.
I don't know if I answered thatright.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
No, you did.
You gave your introspect onthat.
So again, thank you, girl.
That was fun.
Do you have any questions forme, or do you have any
shout-outs, or where can thesepeople find you at?
Speaker 2 (36:47):
So you can find me on Instagram, aaaabbott A-B-B-O
abbott um.
I'm also on youtube, ashleyabbott.
You can search for my musicthere too, and on spotify, um,
so you can look.
You can search up intentions,ethereal love, zodiac, lust.
You're gonna see all my musicon there.
Um, I hope you guys give alisten.
I'm gonna shout out to you,chris omelette, uh for for
(37:08):
having me on this show.
Thank you so much for your timeand for even considering
interviewing me.
I want to shout out to all myfriends and family because if it
wasn't for all my close ones, Idon't know where I'd be today
Just all the support that I get.
And shout out to my kids,because they're really my motive
.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
Well freaking said, miss Ashley.
Well freaking said, excuse me,um.
Shout out to KO Studios.
Thank you for the lovely home.
Shout out to Raffy Bite.
Thank you for the lovely beat.
My man, and with that I'm Chrisand I'm Ashley Abbott good, hey
, thank you, and we out thisbitch peace.
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