The Recovering Porn Addict

Abstinence from pornography and lust hits is the foundation of a solid recovery. Creating and maintaining boundaries is the main way to achieve that abstinence. This episode answers questions like "What are boundaries?", "Why are boundaries important?", "What does a good boundary look like?" and gives specific boundaries that I follow as well as my recovery buddies.

It's important to have...

In order to change our lifestyle and set proper boundaries, we need a clear and direct definition of pornography. By analyzing the stages of relapse (Intrigue, Infatuation, Lust, Sexual Acting Out and Binge Relapsing) and the neurological mechanism of addiction, we can define pornography as any activity that gives you a lust hit. This definition is drastically different from my previous, addict’s definition of pornography and is on...

“Willpower’s Not Enough” is the first book I read in recovery and completely changed my view on my addiction and myself. As the title says, willpower is not enough to recover from an addiction like pornography, but as addicts we keep trying to “white knuckle” our way to sobriety. “Willpower’s Not Enough” provides a wide variety of personal stories to show us that our addiction is just a symptom of deeper problems in our life. The t...

Looking at addiction through the “Secure Attachment Cycle” helps us understand the “why” behind recovery. Addiction to pornography is more than just a “habit,” it is a coping mechanism for the stresses and triggers in our life. As we go through life and our needs are put at risk, we either turn to trusted friends/hobbies or compulsive/addictive activities and substances. 

The only way we can find lasting recovery is:

1) figuring out ...

A common driver for addiction is perfectionism. When we feel like we don’t have control over our own life and can’t achieve perfection, we seek for something that we can control (in a sex addict’s life, this is lust). When perfectionism drives us, we can develop a defeatist mentality (I’m not going to do it perfectly, so why try?) 

In this episode, I talk about perfectionism, how defeatism appears in our lives and how to overcome ou...

My name is David Adamson and I am a porn addict. 

In this episode, I introduce myself and share my story of how I got to become a pornography/lust addict and the first steps that I took towards recovery. I’m not a professional therapist, just a “pro” at being an addict. After starting my addiction when I was 11, it took me over a decade of painful attempts and effort to finally figure out what I was doing wrong in recovery. The firs...