Ep 17: Feeling Unrest at Work? Maybe You're Prioritizing Etiquette Over Professionalism

In this episode, Dana Tenille Weekes challenges the commonly overlooked confusion between niceness and professionalism and how that confusion can create a work culture of unrest.

Dana explores how avoiding the truth under the guise of being "polite" or “professional” leads to unrest for you and your colleagues. She offers a retake on the definition of professionalism: "Owning your responsibilities and the truths and realities of your work with a deep sense of care, requisite skills (and competency), and required pace."

Drawing on her experiences as a lawyer in Big Law and now an organizational health advisor, and incorporating a powerful excerpt from her article on professionalism, which was picked up by Business Insider in 2020, Dana also makes the case that etiquette is often prioritized over equity, which comes at a significant cost.

💡 In This Episode:

• Why “being nice” absolves accountability, builds workarounds for addressing real problems, and discourages problem-solving
• Dana’s definition of professionalism: care, skills, and required pace
• How truth, not etiquette, should define professional behavior
• The understanding that niceness and compassion are not the same thing
• A reading from Dana’s revised article "Want to Do Something to Enact Equity? Quit Being Nice at Work," picked by Business Insider in 2020

🛠️ Key Concepts:

• Care: Calling people IN (not out) with the intention to problem-solve and maintain respect
• Skills: Possessing the skills and experience to apply them (competency) to make informed decisions and manage complexities
• Pace: Being conscious of time, resources, and the necessary skills and competencies required to progress

✍️ Reflection Prompts:

1. When do you default to being nice to avoid, ignore, or distort a situation at work that requires the truth to be addressed? Why?
2. How can you shift from being nice to being compassionate in your work relationships?
3. Think of a truth you must take responsibility for. How do you deliver it with care, skills, and at the pace it demands?

📲 Resources Mentioned:

🔗 Business Insider Article or Instagram — “Want to Do Something to Enact Equity? Quit Being Nice at Work”

If this episode feels like a message or mirror, feel free to share it with someone who is looking to think about rest differently.

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Until next time, rest, my friends.

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