May 7, 2025 • 43 mins
When life takes a turn you never saw coming, is God still good? In this powerful episode, I sit down with Brett Rezewski—caregiver, author, and founder of A Faithful Man’s Journey. Brett’s life changed forever when his wife, Michelle, suffered a massive stroke while pregnant with their fourth child. Diagnosed with Moyamoya, a rare brain disease that had gone undetected, Michelle’s future was uncertain. But through deep loss, daily sacrifice, and moments of miraculous provision, Brett discovered the sustaining power of God’s presence.
We talk about what it means to truly live out your wedding vows, how suffering can bring us closer to Christ, and why the church at its best is still God’s greatest plan for healing community. This episode is raw, hope-filled, and a reminder that God often meets us not after the storm—but in the middle of it.
What You’ll Learn:
How to find purpose in pain and clarity through chaos
The truth behind the phrase “God won’t give you more than you can handle”
What it really means to be a faithful man when life breaks your plans
Links & Resources:
Book: Hope Undeferred – hopeundeferred.com
Men’s Ministry: afaithfulmansjourney.com
Connect with Brett: Sign up for his men’s Bible study or grab his free playbook
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:11):
Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Rev RX
Podcast where we show you how tothrive in faith, family, and
health. My name is Chad Potts and I'm
your host today. I'm so excited for you to meet
our special guest, Brett Razewski.
Brett's an author, he's a caregiver, He's a rock solid
guy. But here's the thing, you're
going to hear his tragic story about how his life changed in a
(00:32):
moment when his wife had a massive stroke, she was pregnant
with their fourth child, and howlife has been so different ever
since. You see, in the midst of this,
they had to make a lot of reallytough decisions, decisions that
a lot of us hope we never have to make, But they made those
decisions with the best that they had.
And here's the thing, despite the tragedy of this story,
(00:55):
despite everything that took place, we see the grace of God
in every step of the way. You're going to love hearing
about his nine year old son who stepped up to play hero on that
day. You're going to love hearing
about the different stories thathe tells about how God's hand
was present in every single detail of what happened.
(01:16):
And you're going to love this conversation about the goodness
of God in both the mountain topsand the valleys.
You see, God doesn't just meet us after the storm.
God is with us in the midst of the storm.
And we're going to talk about that and more today.
So without further ado, I introduced to you my friend,
Brett Razewski. Brett, brother, thank you so
(01:38):
much for joining us today on theshow.
What a privilege it is to have you here with us.
Thank you so much, Chad. I really appreciate being on the
show. Yeah, I'm excited to hear your
story. I'm excited to hear what God's
doing in your life. But before we get into some of
that, I'd just really love to hear who's Brett?
Can you help us get to know you a little bit better?
Yeah, well, right now I live in Beaverton, OR.
(02:01):
I'm born and raised in Ann Arbor, MI After high school, I
listed in the Air Force and I was in, I was in active duty for
eight years, stationed at Fairchild Air Force Base in
Spokane. So that's what pulled me over to
the Northwest after, after the Air Force, I went to school to
become an X-ray tech where I worked at the VA for nine years.
(02:25):
And then I went to school to, todo something from home at
medical building coding, which Inever got a chance to do that.
I'm actually stay home. I take care of my wife right
now. I'm a full time caregiver and
I'll go into Y And you know, onething she had, she had a stroke.
So I'm not sure if we can get right into that story.
(02:46):
Yeah, man, let's go, OK? All right well, you know how
people when they get married, they, they say the vows, you
know, for richer for bore until death do us part sickness and
and health, right Well, we had to do that.
We had to basically fulfill our wedding vows really early.
And when she was 35, she had a massive stroke on June 10th
(03:09):
2017. It was caused by a disease
called Moya Moya disease. And to break it down a little
bit, Moy Moy disease is a, is a disease that she was born with,
but it had been missed her wholelife.
She had been cleaning up headaches.
And what it is, is a narrowing of the arteries at the base of
(03:30):
the brain, which causes superficial arteries to be to be
created. And those superficial arteries
basically blew. She's actually six weeks
pregnant. And when I was at work, it was
on a Saturday afternoon, I was at work.
I have three boys at the time. They were 9-5 and two.
And when she was six weeks pregnant, she just felt really
(03:56):
like nauseous. She actually told me afterward
that she felt like her brain hadexploded.
So it prompted her to go lay down on the bed in our room and
she started to dial 911, but sheshe couldn't for some reason.
There was like a notification that kept on popping up for
(04:17):
thinking that was like a, an update on her phone that wasn't
allowing her to be able to get through 911.
So she faintly called out for myson Connor, who was nine at the
time. He came in and saw that Michelle
was trying to dial 911 and wasn't able to.
And then she went into a seizure.
So Connor saw her have a full blown seizure.
(04:42):
And what I learned yesterday, this was really, really neat.
I learned yesterday that at nineyears old, my son Connor had
peace at that moment. You know, he had he had peace
about seeing his mom have a seizure.
I'm not sure if you've ever seenanyone have a seizure.
It's scary. It's.
Scary, yeah. Like I, I saw Michelle have
(05:03):
another seizure a few months after that.
And it was, it was terrifying for me.
And for Connor. He describes how he had peace in
that time. And I'm just like, that just
blew my mind that somebody so young and so calm, he, he dialed
911 and he saved your life. And he was actually nominated
(05:27):
for the Red Cross Hero Award. Cool.
But he didn't, he didn't, he didn't get it unfortunately.
But to his credit, he's like, that wasn't me acting.
That was God working through me to help me, to give me the
strength that I needed. So even now he's, he's now 17,
he pushed back and he said it wasn't me.
(05:50):
It was the Holy Spirit leading me and giving me peace in order
to save my mom. That's incredible.
Well. And so went to the hospital.
It was actually he he goes on totalk about how our son Shannon,
who she doesn't live near us. She she didn't, she did not live
(06:13):
near us at the time at all. Now she lives out of state.
But she was just happened to be at the right place at the right
time where they saw an ambulancein the fire truck go down the
street leading not even leading to our home wasn't even close.
I think they had to make about four or five turns in order to
get to her house, but she had tonudge to follow.
(06:33):
And she followed the fire truck or ambulance sort of right to
our house. And while going along every
turn, she's like, OK, don't turnthere, don't turn there.
Because she knew that the closerthat one more turn led to our
house and to her fear stepped right in front of our house.
And, you know, I was trying to piece things together afterward.
(06:57):
At the time, our, our two year old, our youngest was 2.
So our kids were 9-5 and two andour youngest was 2.
And he was banging on the window.
I, I heard this from our neighbor across the street.
And he was our neighbor. He was going to come over and
see what was going on, 'cause he's like.
Hayden was just like. Pounding on the window like he
(07:18):
knew something was happening. Yeah, yeah.
And then shortly after he saw him, then the the ambulance
came, the fire trucks came. And then he's like, Oh my gosh,
something is happening. Yeah.
And so the paramedics came and so did Shannon.
Shannon came and Shannon was good friends.
So she was able to stay with thekids while I would go right from
(07:38):
work to the hospital. And it was on the bed where they
intimated my wife, which which saved her, got her to the
hospital where I met her. So she had a tube down her
throat and just lines everywhere.
And I remember going into the hospital, going into the ER
waiting room, and I just said, Michelle, you got to fight for
us, you know, and, and she did. And that was.
(08:03):
Nothing prior to this, right? I mean there no.
She had had headaches, yeah, forentire life.
They had no idea about Moya Moya.
No idea about Moya Moya disease.It was that it was undiagnosed.
Well, and what's really hard about that story is 2 months
prior to her being having the stroke, she went into the doctor
(08:25):
and the doctor said or in her note after the appointment.
Terrible. We actually wrote a book about
our story. You get this on Amazon.
It's called hope undeferred finding the light while in the
tunnel and I need to find so there was a part sorry.
(08:47):
Well, it said she said in the doctor notice said well
localized mid right, deep pain stops her in her tracks and it
reoccurs. So Michelle was just she did
really like good job of explaining how the headaches
were affecting her. Yeah.
And at that appointment, she wasgiven an antidepressant and
saying that she was stressed outmom with three kids.
(09:09):
Also to keep in mind that her mom or her grandma who was 100%
Japanese when she was 50 years old, she had a what we thought
was a brain yanderes and which killed her.
No autopsy was done. But now that we're thinking
after Michelle had Moy Moy disease and we know that it's
hereditary for it's a rare disease but it's more
(09:31):
predominant in Asian women. And Michelle's grandma was 100%
Japanese leaving Michelle 1/4 Japanese.
And every time Michelle would gointo the doctor appointment, she
would tell the doctors that my grandma died of a brain
aneurysm. So we had a history with family
history of something happening, but it was never it was it was
(09:52):
missed. And had if the Moya Moya disease
were had been caught, then a corrective surgery could have
been done to prevent the stroke from happening.
Yes. So, and now she's left paralyzed
on the left side that this so stroke was so bad.
(10:14):
It was a hemorrhagic stroke where she had 200 milliliters of
blood cool on the right side of her brain pushing the midline of
her brain stem over about an about an inch to the left,
itching off her brain stem, which that was the doctors had
they, they told us, you know, the doctors sometimes speak over
you and tell you what what is going to happen now.
(10:36):
The doctors told us that one, they said that the likelihood of
Michelle's survival was Graham. Like that's what doctor stuck on
saying over and over that it wasGraham like she's not going to
survive. And then then you know, the 1st
2448 hours were crucial. Yeah.
So once they once she made it that far, then she was the
(10:58):
doctor like, OK, well, now that she made it this far, chances
are she's going to be a vegetable her whole life.
Well, that didn't happen. And then the doctor said, well,
now that she's, you know, she's aware because of the brain bleed
was so bad it pitched off her brain stem, which she's not
going to be able to swallow her whole life because this the
(11:19):
signal for swallowing starts in the brain stem.
Well, she does, she doesn't haveany food restrictions.
She can eat, she can, she can drink, no restrictions at all.
So God opened that up to her. So they're just like miracle
after miracle that happened to kind of get us where we are.
Yeah, well, and and that story brings up a lot of different
(11:41):
places we could jump off from. But the big thing that's glaring
for me is the fact that, OK, you're, you're, you know, normal
family going about your lives, you're at work.
This terrible thing happens. Yeah.
And it completely transforms thetrajectory of your life moving
(12:01):
forward. But yeah, but I've heard so many
times how God's working anyway, and how God has worked in that
time after time. Again, there's this tendency
today to think that, you know, if, if God's really out there or
if God's really good, then he won't let bad things happen to
us, right. And that's not A, that's not
(12:25):
biblical. No, it's not.
And B, that's just not true. Yeah.
Can you share a little bit about, OK, something tragic
happened, but yet I still see God at work in the midst of it?
Yeah, so right away, I remember when Michelle was at ICU, so she
was in the hospital all togetherfor about 5 months and at
(12:48):
different hospitals and inpatient rehab facilities and
skilled nursing homes. And while she was in ICS for the
first two weeks, I just remembered I was on the elevator
heading home after having been to the hospital all day.
And I just remembered, like I said, God, I don't want this to
go waste. I don't want any suffering to be
wasted. Yeah.
(13:09):
And it was through the the first, I want to say that if
you, any of your listeners like are not plugged into some kind
of church or some kind of community, get involved now.
Start building because it was that church community that
(13:32):
pulled together. So 25 people in my church
gathered when Michelle was waiting or we're all waiting for
her to be done with grace surgery.
They what? And then that started a chain of
events that was just amazing. So my in laws at the time, they
were living in Spokane, WA afterthe stroke, they sold their
(13:53):
house and they were actually living with us.
They lived with us for six yearsand took care of Michelle while
I worked full time. The church built in addition
onto our home so that she could have so that her parents could
live here to take care of Michelle.
And not only that, but they had like 2 for two years, they
brought meals to our house at least two days.
(14:14):
And we're not talking about likeSlim because we're talking about
like leftovers. Like we eat the whole week,
including two years of Thanksgiving with all of the
fixing. So you know, there there's a
verse in the Bible that said that God has prepared good works
in order so that you may walk inthem.
And like, that was a constant theme throughout, like
(14:35):
everything that people were doing for us.
Their belief was that this was already prepared for them to do
for us. Well, and.
And so like, for one thing, that's giving the church a
testimony. Yeah.
Well, it's the church. It's the church being the
church. It's the church being the body
of Christ. The.
Church doing what it should be doing.
(14:57):
Yeah. And I know there's a lot of
people that might be listening to this that have like that
church heard, you know, And it is sad that there are churches
out there that don't demonstratethe body of Christ the way they
should. But that doesn't mean that's
like how it is. You just have to find the the
right community, the right people.
And we own that. That's so important because I
(15:19):
think a lot of times we, you know, our experience with church
maybe hasn't been that great. And unfortunately that becomes
the representation of big C Church of the entire church
based on that that interaction. But what I'm hearing you say and
what I want to reiterate right here for just a minute is that
if you haven't found your group yet, then that doesn't mean
(15:41):
they're not out there. That doesn't mean that there's
not a tribe out there is enough churches out there that are
doing the right thing and be in the hands and feet of Jesus.
Two people in need and, and taking care of their own and
they would love to have you be apart.
So, you know, I, I hear a lot ofbelievers that say I don't need
church. I just, you know, I, I, I read
my Bible and I watch stuff on TVand you know, to which I would
(16:02):
say that's just not the same. You're missing it right
actually. Being obedient to being plugged
into a group of believers because you know, it's like we
when you're apart, like everybody has events that they
go to for businesses and things.Why do we have events?
We have events so we can be around the fire, right?
So when you start stepping away from the fire, you start cooling
(16:25):
off, right? So when you, when you're
gathered around the body of believers, they're staying close
to the fire, you're being grounded.
And that's allowing you, equipping you in order to do the
good works that God has preparedbeforehand for you to do.
Yeah, And you know, we're not perfect.
We're, we're all, we're all human, right, Right.
(16:46):
At least most of us are. You know, we're all human.
But The thing is, we all are following a, a good God.
And, you know, if you're around a bunch of people that are just
gathering around and, and, and following after him the best
they can, everybody's at different stages, Everybody's at
different maturity levels, everybody's at a different point
in their walk. But you know what?
(17:08):
He's the common denominator. And if he's the common
denominator and, and people are really pursuing him, then you're
in the right place. And I love to hear stories like
that about how the church was the church, the church that it
was meant to be. That's encouraging so.
I want to go back to answer moreof your question about what God
has done in us. So I want to talk about the baby
(17:31):
for a minute. So Michelle was six weeks
pregnant and because the baby wasn't viable, the doctors again
were, were saying that if we don't decide about the
pregnancy, that meaning end it, there's a chance that Michelle
could die. You know, And they said, well,
(17:51):
because Michelle, it was, it waseverything was stacked against
her with delight because Michelle was she had a stroke
history of a stroke. She has more and more disease.
She was pregnant with those three things.
There was a high chance that shecould have another stroke and
die, right? And, you know, I'm a firm
believer of like of pro-life andthe sanctity of life.
And I was, you know, praying about this and talking to my
(18:13):
pastors. And one pastor told me his name
is Tom. He told me that God the Father
allowed his son to die so that you will live.
And what that meant to me was that OK?
Well, I, I need to let my, my child die so that my wife would
(18:33):
live, so that my, my boys would have mom growing up.
Because if something could happen to Michelle where there's
a high chance that she could, they both would die and then
we'd be left without mom, without my wife, right.
And so another guy that I talkedto, he said that he allowed the
stroke to be so bad or injury tobe so bad that God pretty much
(18:57):
made the decision for me. But here's what that did for us.
You know, we are able to talk toand connect to so many different
kinds of people. Yeah, I'm a spouse caregiver,
which there aren't that many, but there are some.
There are some that are my age that are taking care of their
spouses. I can connect with those people.
(19:19):
My wife can't connect with people who have had strokes.
We can connect with people that have had, you know, abortions
'cause that's, that's what we had.
We can like all of these different things, but we're
we've chosen to flip it on its head.
Yeah, you know, and rather stay in the pain or using that pain.
(19:42):
You know, we wrote, we have a book where we're using that pain
to turn into, I know it sounds cliche, but you're painter to
purpose. Yeah, right.
But I feel like it's given us another trajectory in order to
connect with other people and tohelp them.
I'm a big believer, and I say this a lot on the podcast.
(20:04):
I'm a big believer that the things that we go through and
the things that God delivers us from and the things that things
that God delivers us through, maybe that's a better way to say
it is those things are meant forus to then turn around and help
other people through because there's something to be said for
(20:25):
empathy. And I'm going to, I'm going to
take the, you know, I'm going totalk about the baby.
A lot of people are very quick to say I know what I would do in
that situation. But Brett, I'm, I'm going to
assume your thought process for a minute and correct me if I'm
wrong. You know, I, I think that
(20:46):
probably nobody really knows what they're going to do in that
situation until they are faced with that possibility.
Would you say that's pretty accurate?
Yeah, definitely. Yeah.
And, you know, a lot of times we, we're just, you know, we
don't understand all of the complexity of some of these
situations until we go through them.
(21:06):
And so for somebody dealing witha situation like that, well,
Brett, you're the perfect personto go to them and, and to tell
them not to tell them what to do, but to tell them how you've
dealt with it. And to tell them, you know, the
emotions that you have felt, thethe support that you have felt
and the different things that you've learned.
And you know that that applies to every aspect of this journey,
(21:29):
doesn't it? You'd mentioned that your son,
he, he was describing some of that peace.
Yeah. And what you'd mentioned to me
beforehand that that was part ofa speech was, is, was that part,
part of that speech? And.
Then no, not that part, but whatit, what he was saying is that
suffering like this is really paradoxical for people to
(21:50):
understand, but he was saying that suffering is actually good
for you. And then he was explaining to
himself, because in the Bible itsays suffering leads to
perseverance and perseverance hope and hope does not
disappoint, right? So he he framed his thoughts
(22:14):
basically that when we go through suffering, it's God's
way of growing us. Yeah.
If you let. It.
Yeah, yeah. There's so many points, there's
so many times where people push back and they blame God and they
say if God were good, then why would he allow this to happen?
Right, Right. It the foot, the opposite is
actually true. Since God is good, he allows it
(22:36):
to happen to you so that you canbecome closer to him.
Yeah, Most of the time where we've gone through pain in our
life, God, that's when we've grown closest to the Lord.
Before all of this, back in 2009, we had another
miscarriage. Jacob was Michelle was 20 weeks
pregnant with Jacob when his heart stopped.
(22:58):
I was finishing my I was actually, I was in the Air Force
at the time. And yeah, his his heart stopped.
Michelle had to deliver him in the hospital, you know,
regularly at the Dural, the whole nine.
Yeah. And then we, we held Jacob in
the plum of our hand, like he fit like, and we, we held on to
(23:19):
him. And that was really a crucial
time in my walk with the Lord. But we're so I'm reading through
the book of Judges right now, you know, and the, and the
judges, you see the Israelites, they go up and down with their
fate right there. They realize that they're crying
out to God. God sends the rescuer knees and
(23:41):
oh, and they're good. Oh, and then they, that's like
how I was. So I feel like when I started
drifting away, it's like I need that correction.
But yeah, I feel like that's I just, I, I knew right after
Michelle had a stroke that I need to do something different.
(24:03):
I, I needed to make a decision not only for me, but for my
family. I needed because I realized that
if I had let bitterness and you know and blame God and Apple 9,
then chances are that my boys with you would have that same
perspective and that they might not even trust the Lord later
(24:25):
on. But I believe that through God
give me the strength to make that decision.
My son was able to make that speech in his class.
That's cool. You know, isn't it?
I was like, well, it was just blown away.
Like as I was watching it, I waslike, he gets it.
Yeah, yeah, he gets it, 17 and he gets it.
(24:47):
You know it. And there's a ripple effect to
all of our decisions, particularly those decisions
about faith. Rarely do we make decisions and
they're in the vacuum, right? It's going to affect other
people. So I love that.
Like your decision to let God turn this into something to grow
you rather than just be angry with God for it happening,
(25:10):
impacted generations to come. We have no idea what impact that
may have down the road to his kids and his kids, you know?
And so I think that's awesome. And then thinking about the
truth behind that, that, yes, suffering isn't pleasant.
And, you know, I think a lot of us spend our lives trying to
(25:30):
avoid it. If we're honest.
Nobody's like suffering. Sign me up for that, right?
You know, it's one of those things that we, we don't, we
don't appreciate until sometimeswhen we're going through it or a
lot of times looking back. And you know, we don't grow in
our comfort zones. We grow whenever we can't.
(25:53):
And here's something God's been teaching me lately too, is that,
you know, as long as I'm in control and as long as I can
control everything, as long as I'm comfortable, then I feel
like that's what I'm after. But you know what?
I don't have to rely on God during those times.
It's in those moments where I lose control and I realize just
how helpless I am. And I realized that, you know
(26:14):
what I don't? I'm not in control of any of
this stuff. I realized my need for the Lord
and and so, you know, suffering can bring about great growth in
our spiritual lives. And you said it right, if we let
it. If you, you had a decision, you
had a decision or I'm not going to let this take me this way or
(26:35):
let me take it this way. And and you know, at the time,
maybe you weren't thinking aboutyour son giving a speech when he
was 17, but you knew enough to think my decision is going to
impact them one way or another. Yeah.
And and so I love that you were able to think outside of
yourself. And I think God gives us that
ability because, you know, the Ithink we're born with this
(26:57):
nature that wants to think aboutme, myself and I this inward
bent on ourselves, if if you will.
But God gives us that ability through his spirit to be able to
say, you know, it's not all about me.
Let me look and see what, you know, what else this may affect.
And and so, man, I'm excited to to see your kids grow up and to
(27:19):
see it it and realizing at that age of nine that the presence of
God was in him. Yeah, the peace of God was in
him. When when I heard him say that,
like he, I mean most adults, they would freak out.
Right. Right, you know, like I, I was
going, I, I often go back or tryto think about what would I have
(27:44):
done if I were there. Yeah.
And here's my thinking. So knowing what I was done,
knowing what I did prior to the stroke.
Cause here the night that Michelle had her stroke, I was
actually had a fight. We were arguing and Sia told me
(28:04):
that she's never felt that anxious before.
Before that for that day she diddeal with anxiety, but she told
me before I left that I have never felt this anxious before
is what she told me. And then I, I prayed with her I
think. And I said I'm sorry Michelle, I
I gotta go to work. I was, I was running late.
(28:26):
So I remember praying with her and I kissed her for it.
Then I walked out of the door and the next thing I wanna saw
her is when she had after she had her show.
So, but before then, what I would have done if I were home
and she were stressed, I would probably have taken the kids
away from the house so that Michelle could have the quiet
time. And then if I had done that, I
(28:48):
might have come home to it. Right.
Right. You know, So God was allowing me
to be gone. Yeah.
For everything had to happen exactly the way it did in order
for us to wind up here we are now.
Yeah. Yeah.
And, you know, it's maybe a different path than you would
have chosen to walk, but it's one that's glorifying God every
(29:13):
step of the way. And I appreciate that about, you
know, some of the, some of the, I, I guess some of the things
that are important to you right now are, are telling your story
and providing people hope when they go through dark times,
finding the light in the tunnel.I like that.
But then it's also raising awareness about Moya Moya.
(29:33):
So can you tell us a little bit about that and how we can kind
of make people more aware of of that condition and maybe make it
to where someone else has it picked up a little sooner?
OK, so it started with headachesand headaches are really tough
for doctors to diagnose. I mean, they could be anything.
They could be migraine, they could be it could be stress.
(29:55):
But one thing that I want to sayis that, you know, after having
complaints of so many doctors over and over again and being
told that it's nothing, we kind of gave up, you know, 'cause
when you, when you do a complaining, you find out that
maybe it's something that I haveto live with.
(30:15):
We, we stopped. Yeah.
And what we're what we learned afterward is that if Michelle
had an MRA of the, of the brain.So it's an MRI with contrast.
Yeah. So if they were, if she would
have had the MRA, it would have picked up the Moy Moy.
(30:36):
Yeah. And then there's on the vessels,
so. That picks up, right?
Yeah. And then they she could have had
a surgery to correct it to prevent the stroke.
Yeah, and that's big. You know, in healthcare myself,
I understand how much you've gotto advocate for yourself
because, yeah, you know, the thesystem is, you know, it is what
(30:56):
it is. And you know, we have thoughts,
but that's a different conversation for a different
day. But you know it, it's a system
where you go in to see your doctor and they've got 20
minutes to see you and, you know, they're they're assessing
some things. And you're right.
Like headache is such a non general symptom.
It could be anything, especiallywith a woman, you know, it could
be cycle related, you know, justa lot of different things to.
(31:20):
But here's the thing. If if you're getting a gut
feeling that maybe there's something more than than what
I'm getting, you know, they're telling me, oh, it's fine.
It's normal that you just aren'tOK with that.
It's OK to it's OK to push back.It's OK.
It's OK to advocate for yourselfand it's OK to, you know, find
second opinions, third opinions or whatever you need, because I
(31:42):
hear stories like this a lot to where, you know, we go and we,
we think, OK, well, apparently I'm fine or apparently I've just
got to live with this. But you know that that's one
person's medical opinion. That doesn't mean that's the
gospel truth. And so trust that intuition in
yourself too, because a lot of times that might be the Holy
Spirit moving in you to kind of prompt you.
(32:04):
Maybe, maybe, maybe I need to push further and, and, and a lot
of people feel like that when wego to the doctor, you know,
that, that they're the expert and we know nothing.
And so I've got to do whatever they say and whatever they say
is right. Well, you know, there's a reason
they call it practicing medicine, because it's not, as
(32:25):
you know, it's not as cut and dry as you think.
That's you know. It is kind of an art.
And, you know, people are different.
Everyone's different. Everyone has a different makeup.
Everyone has different symptoms.And so, you know, that's one
person's medical opinion. But that doesn't make it the
only medical opinion out there. And so I love that.
(32:46):
Encouraging people to advocate for yourself.
Yeah. Thinking about family history
too is important, right? Exactly.
Yeah, with, with her grandmotherhaving this issue and you know,
of course, no definitive way to know, but yeah, I mean, that's
important to make sure that we're thinking back and like,
all right, a lot of these thingsare hereditary.
(33:06):
Yeah. And we actually, we got our kids
screened. So I had, I pushed for Mras for
all three of them and they're clear.
Good. So we're we're thankful for
that. But yeah, if the doctors had, I
was, I was actually digging through medical records after
the stroke just to see if there's something that could
have been done, something that was missed.
And, and when I when I read thatdoctor's note like I told you
(33:28):
about and the stroke was on the right side of her brain.
Deep, very specific mid. Exactly.
Very specific that she, the doctor didn't even describe
where it was happening. Yeah.
And the, and also another thing that happened with Michelle
after that, she was having fainting episodes, so much so
(33:49):
where the doctor ordered her to wear a halter, monitored her to
check her heart. Gotcha.
Which came back normal. Yeah, that wouldn't have showed
up. Yeah.
So what it was we're thinking isthat because what so the Moya
Moya while the the arteries are constricted is it was preventing
blood and oxygen to get to the brain.
(34:11):
And actually our our good friendVince Murdoch, I'm not sure if
you know he's AUFC fighter. OK, Yeah.
And he, he was actually right before one of his fights, he had
to get screened just to make sure he's cleared the fight.
And they found Moya Moya in him,so much so that he had 100%
blockage on one side of his brain and some symptoms.
(34:34):
I was talking with him the otherday.
He said some symptoms for him where he just felt like he
knows, he knows his body really well because he's such like a
hard athlete. Yeah.
But he started getting really tired and started getting more
fatigued. And that was like something
that. But again, he, he was thinking
that it was something else. Then he found out that was my
(34:56):
boy, and he was he. I was fortunate enough to have
the surgery before something happened.
Yeah, but Michelle was fainting.She was having these headaches.
So they're like all these red flags, but.
Well, and you know, it's, you can't go back and change it,
right. But but you know, what you can
(35:16):
do is raise awareness, Yeah. Make people aware of of this
rare disease and, and tell people to advocate for
themselves because you know what, you might save somebody
from having to go through or from, you know, from death or
from having to go through some of the things that that you've
gone through. But I'm going to ask you
something and go for it. Take it or leave it.
(35:40):
Would you change anything? That is a really hard question.
Yes and no. Yes, because I see how I was
back then. You know, my wife would come to
me about how burdened she was, like with the three kids, with
(36:05):
doing everything, with managing the finances, the grocery
shopping, doing all the things that she would come to me over
and over and over again. And I wouldn't, I wouldn't do
much to take things off her plate.
And it, it wasn't until afterward where I had no choice.
You know the term sink or swim. Well, we, we sunk for a while
(36:27):
Now we're like, we're trying to,we're, we're, we're treading
water and we're, we're doing ourbest to stay flow.
But it made me realize what I was actually doing.
And now I, I look for, for example, when you see a, a
couple at a grocery store who isusually the one leading the way
(36:50):
wife. And then when I'm looking, I'm
like, that was me. I was the passive one, letting
her do all of it. And then and even one of my, one
of my friends, right. He doesn't really manage the
calendar. You know, that's his life's job.
That was my life's job. My wife did all the planning.
(37:12):
She did the calendar, she did the package for the trips.
I have to do it. And it it's caused me to grow
and to become a better leader. Yeah, you know, And so yes, I
would change it to, you know, tohave so that she wouldn't should
she would have all of her faculties and she'd be able to
(37:33):
walk and but no, because it's helped me grow and to become the
person that God created me to be.
Yeah. So it's, yeah, two sides to the
same coin. I love that.
That's a fantastic answer and I've never asked that before on
a podcast. So I appreciate you.
I appreciate you being honest and, and, and just really
(37:54):
opening up to us today because you know, what we're trying to
say is that you know what life'snot, life doesn't go the way
that we want it to a lot of times.
And we're not in control of that.
As much as we like to think we are You, we don't have control
of that. What we do have control of is
how we respond. How we respond exactly?
(38:15):
Yeah, and brother, your faith through it all is inspiring, and
I appreciate you sharing that with my listeners today.
Even when life takes a turn and even when life looks different
than you would have ever dreamed, God is still.
God is still with you. There's one point that I want to
make So. And the Bible can be
(38:38):
misinterpreted a lot. So one verse that can be
misinterpreted is First Corinthians 10/13, which says no
temptation is overtaking you except, which is common to man.
But God is faithful. He will not allow you to be
tempted beyond what you are able, but with a temptation, he
will give you a way of escape sothat you can endure it.
(38:59):
And a lot of people look at thatverse and say, well that means
that God won't allow me to go through anything more than I can
handle. And we hear that a lot, don't
we? God won't give you more than
give you handle. But if God would not allow you
to go through anything more thanyou can handle, then what's the
point of having Him if you can handle everything on your own,
(39:20):
right? But and.
It's that's powerful. And by and Paul in Corinthians,
he talks about being like near death, like wanting, like
because he's been shipwrecked, he's been taken prisoner to the
point of wanting to die, right? Like he's suffering that much.
And then he says that because myweakness is like his strength is
(39:47):
proven to my weakness. I'm not saying it correctly, but
the point is like God's power ismade aware by our weakness, by
our our struggle. Yeah.
So that we can point him and sayit's not us, so that there's no
boasting in us, but it's power, it's power of God in US that
helps us to get through those times.
(40:08):
Yeah, yeah, I love every bit of that.
That's extremely, extremely powerful.
And I see that in your son, who says it wasn't me.
Yeah, I know. It wasn't me.
It was him. So, yeah, it's a lie.
God won't give you more than youcan handle.
Yes, he will. He will.
Other. Otherwise, what's the point,
right? Why do we need him if we can
(40:31):
handle it all? But here's the thing.
We we don't realize a lot of times how much we need him until
we got to have him. Yeah.
And then when we rely solely on him, he comes through every
time. And it doesn't mean he changes
our circumstances. I want to make that clear, too.
Sometimes he does deliver us from our circumstances.
A lot of times he delivers us through our circumstances.
(40:52):
Sometimes he makes you find the light while in the tunnel.
Amen. Amen.
You. Know that's why I wrote this
book because some people they don't see that trial ending and
they feel like there's no like there's no hope but there there
is and you know the hope is Jesus while you while you're
going into that tunnel so. Man, so good.
(41:16):
Well, Brett, tell us, tell us where we can find your book.
If anybody out here wants to getget in contact with you, if
they're moved by your story or encouraged by your story, how
can they reach you? How can they get into your
world? So I have a website for my book.
It's at hopeundeferred.com. But I've also started something
called The Faithful Man's Journey because while I've been,
(41:39):
you know, talking with a lot of people, especially as X-rays I
got when I was working there, I,I talked to a lot of people and
some people their, their husbands left after their wives
had a stroke or some sort of illness.
And that happens a lot. Yeah.
So they in, you know, they decide to go the wrong way of
the fork in the road. So I created the faithful man's
(42:01):
dream. There's a document and I have a
a six day challenge leading to amen's Bible study that happens
on Friday mornings at 8:00 AM Pacific.
Awesome. So I've kind of given.
So if people are like strugglingto find their own community, I
have one for them that I can plug into.
(42:22):
So if you can go to faithfulmansjourney.com and then
get the playbook that I've created, which will help them
lead towards get on discovery call with me.
And then they can get on the getplugged into that men's call
where we really, you know, help men sharpen each other.
Yeah, as iron sharpens iron, oneman sharpens another, right?
(42:43):
Exactly, Yeah. Well, thanks, Brett.
I'm going to put all those linksin the show notes, but keep
doing great things, man. You're doing tremendous work for
the Kingdom and your story is encouraging, and I just wish
nothing but blessings on you andyour family.
And man, if I can help you guys at all, you reach out.
But you guys check out Brett, the work he's doing, pick up his
(43:05):
book. It's going to be a great source
of encouragement for you, man. Just keep being great for the
Kingdom. All right.
Appreciate it brother. Thank you for listening to the
Rev RX Podcast. We hope you enjoyed what you
heard today and if so, we'd loveit if you would hit that
subscribe button so that you'll never miss a new episode from
us. Also, feel free to leave us
(43:25):
reviews and comments as we'd love to hear from you.
Be blessed and be the very best you.
Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Rev RX
Podcast where we show you how tothrive in faith, family, and
health. My name is Chad Potts and I'm
your host today. I'm so excited for you to meet
our special guest, Brett Razewski.
Brett's an author, he's a caregiver, He's a rock solid
guy. But here's the thing, you're
going to hear his tragic story about how his life changed in a
(00:32):
moment when his wife had a massive stroke, she was pregnant
with their fourth child, and howlife has been so different ever
since. You see, in the midst of this,
they had to make a lot of reallytough decisions, decisions that
a lot of us hope we never have to make, But they made those
decisions with the best that they had.
And here's the thing, despite the tragedy of this story,
(00:55):
despite everything that took place, we see the grace of God
in every step of the way. You're going to love hearing
about his nine year old son who stepped up to play hero on that
day. You're going to love hearing
about the different stories thathe tells about how God's hand
was present in every single detail of what happened.
(01:16):
And you're going to love this conversation about the goodness
of God in both the mountain topsand the valleys.
You see, God doesn't just meet us after the storm.
God is with us in the midst of the storm.
And we're going to talk about that and more today.
So without further ado, I introduced to you my friend,
Brett Razewski. Brett, brother, thank you so
(01:38):
much for joining us today on theshow.
What a privilege it is to have you here with us.
Thank you so much, Chad. I really appreciate being on the
show. Yeah, I'm excited to hear your
story. I'm excited to hear what God's
doing in your life. But before we get into some of
that, I'd just really love to hear who's Brett?
Can you help us get to know you a little bit better?
Yeah, well, right now I live in Beaverton, OR.
(02:01):
I'm born and raised in Ann Arbor, MI After high school, I
listed in the Air Force and I was in, I was in active duty for
eight years, stationed at Fairchild Air Force Base in
Spokane. So that's what pulled me over to
the Northwest after, after the Air Force, I went to school to
become an X-ray tech where I worked at the VA for nine years.
(02:25):
And then I went to school to, todo something from home at
medical building coding, which Inever got a chance to do that.
I'm actually stay home. I take care of my wife right
now. I'm a full time caregiver and
I'll go into Y And you know, onething she had, she had a stroke.
So I'm not sure if we can get right into that story.
(02:46):
Yeah, man, let's go, OK? All right well, you know how
people when they get married, they, they say the vows, you
know, for richer for bore until death do us part sickness and
and health, right Well, we had to do that.
We had to basically fulfill our wedding vows really early.
And when she was 35, she had a massive stroke on June 10th
(03:09):
2017. It was caused by a disease
called Moya Moya disease. And to break it down a little
bit, Moy Moy disease is a, is a disease that she was born with,
but it had been missed her wholelife.
She had been cleaning up headaches.
And what it is, is a narrowing of the arteries at the base of
(03:30):
the brain, which causes superficial arteries to be to be
created. And those superficial arteries
basically blew. She's actually six weeks
pregnant. And when I was at work, it was
on a Saturday afternoon, I was at work.
I have three boys at the time. They were 9-5 and two.
And when she was six weeks pregnant, she just felt really
(03:56):
like nauseous. She actually told me afterward
that she felt like her brain hadexploded.
So it prompted her to go lay down on the bed in our room and
she started to dial 911, but sheshe couldn't for some reason.
There was like a notification that kept on popping up for
(04:17):
thinking that was like a, an update on her phone that wasn't
allowing her to be able to get through 911.
So she faintly called out for myson Connor, who was nine at the
time. He came in and saw that Michelle
was trying to dial 911 and wasn't able to.
And then she went into a seizure.
So Connor saw her have a full blown seizure.
(04:42):
And what I learned yesterday, this was really, really neat.
I learned yesterday that at nineyears old, my son Connor had
peace at that moment. You know, he had he had peace
about seeing his mom have a seizure.
I'm not sure if you've ever seenanyone have a seizure.
It's scary. It's.
Scary, yeah. Like I, I saw Michelle have
(05:03):
another seizure a few months after that.
And it was, it was terrifying for me.
And for Connor. He describes how he had peace in
that time. And I'm just like, that just
blew my mind that somebody so young and so calm, he, he dialed
911 and he saved your life. And he was actually nominated
(05:27):
for the Red Cross Hero Award. Cool.
But he didn't, he didn't, he didn't get it unfortunately.
But to his credit, he's like, that wasn't me acting.
That was God working through me to help me, to give me the
strength that I needed. So even now he's, he's now 17,
he pushed back and he said it wasn't me.
(05:50):
It was the Holy Spirit leading me and giving me peace in order
to save my mom. That's incredible.
Well. And so went to the hospital.
It was actually he he goes on totalk about how our son Shannon,
who she doesn't live near us. She she didn't, she did not live
(06:13):
near us at the time at all. Now she lives out of state.
But she was just happened to be at the right place at the right
time where they saw an ambulancein the fire truck go down the
street leading not even leading to our home wasn't even close.
I think they had to make about four or five turns in order to
get to her house, but she had tonudge to follow.
(06:33):
And she followed the fire truck or ambulance sort of right to
our house. And while going along every
turn, she's like, OK, don't turnthere, don't turn there.
Because she knew that the closerthat one more turn led to our
house and to her fear stepped right in front of our house.
And, you know, I was trying to piece things together afterward.
(06:57):
At the time, our, our two year old, our youngest was 2.
So our kids were 9-5 and two andour youngest was 2.
And he was banging on the window.
I, I heard this from our neighbor across the street.
And he was our neighbor. He was going to come over and
see what was going on, 'cause he's like.
Hayden was just like. Pounding on the window like he
(07:18):
knew something was happening. Yeah, yeah.
And then shortly after he saw him, then the the ambulance
came, the fire trucks came. And then he's like, Oh my gosh,
something is happening. Yeah.
And so the paramedics came and so did Shannon.
Shannon came and Shannon was good friends.
So she was able to stay with thekids while I would go right from
(07:38):
work to the hospital. And it was on the bed where they
intimated my wife, which which saved her, got her to the
hospital where I met her. So she had a tube down her
throat and just lines everywhere.
And I remember going into the hospital, going into the ER
waiting room, and I just said, Michelle, you got to fight for
us, you know, and, and she did. And that was.
(08:03):
Nothing prior to this, right? I mean there no.
She had had headaches, yeah, forentire life.
They had no idea about Moya Moya.
No idea about Moya Moya disease.It was that it was undiagnosed.
Well, and what's really hard about that story is 2 months
prior to her being having the stroke, she went into the doctor
(08:25):
and the doctor said or in her note after the appointment.
Terrible. We actually wrote a book about
our story. You get this on Amazon.
It's called hope undeferred finding the light while in the
tunnel and I need to find so there was a part sorry.
(08:47):
Well, it said she said in the doctor notice said well
localized mid right, deep pain stops her in her tracks and it
reoccurs. So Michelle was just she did
really like good job of explaining how the headaches
were affecting her. Yeah.
And at that appointment, she wasgiven an antidepressant and
saying that she was stressed outmom with three kids.
(09:09):
Also to keep in mind that her mom or her grandma who was 100%
Japanese when she was 50 years old, she had a what we thought
was a brain yanderes and which killed her.
No autopsy was done. But now that we're thinking
after Michelle had Moy Moy disease and we know that it's
hereditary for it's a rare disease but it's more
(09:31):
predominant in Asian women. And Michelle's grandma was 100%
Japanese leaving Michelle 1/4 Japanese.
And every time Michelle would gointo the doctor appointment, she
would tell the doctors that my grandma died of a brain
aneurysm. So we had a history with family
history of something happening, but it was never it was it was
(09:52):
missed. And had if the Moya Moya disease
were had been caught, then a corrective surgery could have
been done to prevent the stroke from happening.
Yes. So, and now she's left paralyzed
on the left side that this so stroke was so bad.
(10:14):
It was a hemorrhagic stroke where she had 200 milliliters of
blood cool on the right side of her brain pushing the midline of
her brain stem over about an about an inch to the left,
itching off her brain stem, which that was the doctors had
they, they told us, you know, the doctors sometimes speak over
you and tell you what what is going to happen now.
(10:36):
The doctors told us that one, they said that the likelihood of
Michelle's survival was Graham. Like that's what doctor stuck on
saying over and over that it wasGraham like she's not going to
survive. And then then you know, the 1st
2448 hours were crucial. Yeah.
So once they once she made it that far, then she was the
(10:58):
doctor like, OK, well, now that she made it this far, chances
are she's going to be a vegetable her whole life.
Well, that didn't happen. And then the doctor said, well,
now that she's, you know, she's aware because of the brain bleed
was so bad it pitched off her brain stem, which she's not
going to be able to swallow her whole life because this the
(11:19):
signal for swallowing starts in the brain stem.
Well, she does, she doesn't haveany food restrictions.
She can eat, she can, she can drink, no restrictions at all.
So God opened that up to her. So they're just like miracle
after miracle that happened to kind of get us where we are.
Yeah, well, and and that story brings up a lot of different
(11:41):
places we could jump off from. But the big thing that's glaring
for me is the fact that, OK, you're, you're, you know, normal
family going about your lives, you're at work.
This terrible thing happens. Yeah.
And it completely transforms thetrajectory of your life moving
(12:01):
forward. But yeah, but I've heard so many
times how God's working anyway, and how God has worked in that
time after time. Again, there's this tendency
today to think that, you know, if, if God's really out there or
if God's really good, then he won't let bad things happen to
us, right. And that's not A, that's not
(12:25):
biblical. No, it's not.
And B, that's just not true. Yeah.
Can you share a little bit about, OK, something tragic
happened, but yet I still see God at work in the midst of it?
Yeah, so right away, I remember when Michelle was at ICU, so she
was in the hospital all togetherfor about 5 months and at
(12:48):
different hospitals and inpatient rehab facilities and
skilled nursing homes. And while she was in ICS for the
first two weeks, I just remembered I was on the elevator
heading home after having been to the hospital all day.
And I just remembered, like I said, God, I don't want this to
go waste. I don't want any suffering to be
wasted. Yeah.
(13:09):
And it was through the the first, I want to say that if
you, any of your listeners like are not plugged into some kind
of church or some kind of community, get involved now.
Start building because it was that church community that
(13:32):
pulled together. So 25 people in my church
gathered when Michelle was waiting or we're all waiting for
her to be done with grace surgery.
They what? And then that started a chain of
events that was just amazing. So my in laws at the time, they
were living in Spokane, WA afterthe stroke, they sold their
(13:53):
house and they were actually living with us.
They lived with us for six yearsand took care of Michelle while
I worked full time. The church built in addition
onto our home so that she could have so that her parents could
live here to take care of Michelle.
And not only that, but they had like 2 for two years, they
brought meals to our house at least two days.
(14:14):
And we're not talking about likeSlim because we're talking about
like leftovers. Like we eat the whole week,
including two years of Thanksgiving with all of the
fixing. So you know, there there's a
verse in the Bible that said that God has prepared good works
in order so that you may walk inthem.
And like, that was a constant theme throughout, like
(14:35):
everything that people were doing for us.
Their belief was that this was already prepared for them to do
for us. Well, and.
And so like, for one thing, that's giving the church a
testimony. Yeah.
Well, it's the church. It's the church being the
church. It's the church being the body
of Christ. The.
Church doing what it should be doing.
(14:57):
Yeah. And I know there's a lot of
people that might be listening to this that have like that
church heard, you know, And it is sad that there are churches
out there that don't demonstratethe body of Christ the way they
should. But that doesn't mean that's
like how it is. You just have to find the the
right community, the right people.
And we own that. That's so important because I
(15:19):
think a lot of times we, you know, our experience with church
maybe hasn't been that great. And unfortunately that becomes
the representation of big C Church of the entire church
based on that that interaction. But what I'm hearing you say and
what I want to reiterate right here for just a minute is that
if you haven't found your group yet, then that doesn't mean
(15:41):
they're not out there. That doesn't mean that there's
not a tribe out there is enough churches out there that are
doing the right thing and be in the hands and feet of Jesus.
Two people in need and, and taking care of their own and
they would love to have you be apart.
So, you know, I, I hear a lot ofbelievers that say I don't need
church. I just, you know, I, I, I read
my Bible and I watch stuff on TVand you know, to which I would
(16:02):
say that's just not the same. You're missing it right
actually. Being obedient to being plugged
into a group of believers because you know, it's like we
when you're apart, like everybody has events that they
go to for businesses and things.Why do we have events?
We have events so we can be around the fire, right?
So when you start stepping away from the fire, you start cooling
(16:25):
off, right? So when you, when you're
gathered around the body of believers, they're staying close
to the fire, you're being grounded.
And that's allowing you, equipping you in order to do the
good works that God has preparedbeforehand for you to do.
Yeah, And you know, we're not perfect.
We're, we're all, we're all human, right, Right.
(16:46):
At least most of us are. You know, we're all human.
But The thing is, we all are following a, a good God.
And, you know, if you're around a bunch of people that are just
gathering around and, and, and following after him the best
they can, everybody's at different stages, Everybody's at
different maturity levels, everybody's at a different point
in their walk. But you know what?
(17:08):
He's the common denominator. And if he's the common
denominator and, and people are really pursuing him, then you're
in the right place. And I love to hear stories like
that about how the church was the church, the church that it
was meant to be. That's encouraging so.
I want to go back to answer moreof your question about what God
has done in us. So I want to talk about the baby
(17:31):
for a minute. So Michelle was six weeks
pregnant and because the baby wasn't viable, the doctors again
were, were saying that if we don't decide about the
pregnancy, that meaning end it, there's a chance that Michelle
could die. You know, And they said, well,
(17:51):
because Michelle, it was, it waseverything was stacked against
her with delight because Michelle was she had a stroke
history of a stroke. She has more and more disease.
She was pregnant with those three things.
There was a high chance that shecould have another stroke and
die, right? And, you know, I'm a firm
believer of like of pro-life andthe sanctity of life.
And I was, you know, praying about this and talking to my
(18:13):
pastors. And one pastor told me his name
is Tom. He told me that God the Father
allowed his son to die so that you will live.
And what that meant to me was that OK?
Well, I, I need to let my, my child die so that my wife would
(18:33):
live, so that my, my boys would have mom growing up.
Because if something could happen to Michelle where there's
a high chance that she could, they both would die and then
we'd be left without mom, without my wife, right.
And so another guy that I talkedto, he said that he allowed the
stroke to be so bad or injury tobe so bad that God pretty much
(18:57):
made the decision for me. But here's what that did for us.
You know, we are able to talk toand connect to so many different
kinds of people. Yeah, I'm a spouse caregiver,
which there aren't that many, but there are some.
There are some that are my age that are taking care of their
spouses. I can connect with those people.
(19:19):
My wife can't connect with people who have had strokes.
We can connect with people that have had, you know, abortions
'cause that's, that's what we had.
We can like all of these different things, but we're
we've chosen to flip it on its head.
Yeah, you know, and rather stay in the pain or using that pain.
(19:42):
You know, we wrote, we have a book where we're using that pain
to turn into, I know it sounds cliche, but you're painter to
purpose. Yeah, right.
But I feel like it's given us another trajectory in order to
connect with other people and tohelp them.
I'm a big believer, and I say this a lot on the podcast.
(20:04):
I'm a big believer that the things that we go through and
the things that God delivers us from and the things that things
that God delivers us through, maybe that's a better way to say
it is those things are meant forus to then turn around and help
other people through because there's something to be said for
(20:25):
empathy. And I'm going to, I'm going to
take the, you know, I'm going totalk about the baby.
A lot of people are very quick to say I know what I would do in
that situation. But Brett, I'm, I'm going to
assume your thought process for a minute and correct me if I'm
wrong. You know, I, I think that
(20:46):
probably nobody really knows what they're going to do in that
situation until they are faced with that possibility.
Would you say that's pretty accurate?
Yeah, definitely. Yeah.
And, you know, a lot of times we, we're just, you know, we
don't understand all of the complexity of some of these
situations until we go through them.
(21:06):
And so for somebody dealing witha situation like that, well,
Brett, you're the perfect personto go to them and, and to tell
them not to tell them what to do, but to tell them how you've
dealt with it. And to tell them, you know, the
emotions that you have felt, thethe support that you have felt
and the different things that you've learned.
And you know that that applies to every aspect of this journey,
(21:29):
doesn't it? You'd mentioned that your son,
he, he was describing some of that peace.
Yeah. And what you'd mentioned to me
beforehand that that was part ofa speech was, is, was that part,
part of that speech? And.
Then no, not that part, but whatit, what he was saying is that
suffering like this is really paradoxical for people to
(21:50):
understand, but he was saying that suffering is actually good
for you. And then he was explaining to
himself, because in the Bible itsays suffering leads to
perseverance and perseverance hope and hope does not
disappoint, right? So he he framed his thoughts
(22:14):
basically that when we go through suffering, it's God's
way of growing us. Yeah.
If you let. It.
Yeah, yeah. There's so many points, there's
so many times where people push back and they blame God and they
say if God were good, then why would he allow this to happen?
Right, Right. It the foot, the opposite is
actually true. Since God is good, he allows it
(22:36):
to happen to you so that you canbecome closer to him.
Yeah, Most of the time where we've gone through pain in our
life, God, that's when we've grown closest to the Lord.
Before all of this, back in 2009, we had another
miscarriage. Jacob was Michelle was 20 weeks
pregnant with Jacob when his heart stopped.
(22:58):
I was finishing my I was actually, I was in the Air Force
at the time. And yeah, his his heart stopped.
Michelle had to deliver him in the hospital, you know,
regularly at the Dural, the whole nine.
Yeah. And then we, we held Jacob in
the plum of our hand, like he fit like, and we, we held on to
(23:19):
him. And that was really a crucial
time in my walk with the Lord. But we're so I'm reading through
the book of Judges right now, you know, and the, and the
judges, you see the Israelites, they go up and down with their
fate right there. They realize that they're crying
out to God. God sends the rescuer knees and
(23:41):
oh, and they're good. Oh, and then they, that's like
how I was. So I feel like when I started
drifting away, it's like I need that correction.
But yeah, I feel like that's I just, I, I knew right after
Michelle had a stroke that I need to do something different.
(24:03):
I, I needed to make a decision not only for me, but for my
family. I needed because I realized that
if I had let bitterness and you know and blame God and Apple 9,
then chances are that my boys with you would have that same
perspective and that they might not even trust the Lord later
(24:25):
on. But I believe that through God
give me the strength to make that decision.
My son was able to make that speech in his class.
That's cool. You know, isn't it?
I was like, well, it was just blown away.
Like as I was watching it, I waslike, he gets it.
Yeah, yeah, he gets it, 17 and he gets it.
(24:47):
You know it. And there's a ripple effect to
all of our decisions, particularly those decisions
about faith. Rarely do we make decisions and
they're in the vacuum, right? It's going to affect other
people. So I love that.
Like your decision to let God turn this into something to grow
you rather than just be angry with God for it happening,
(25:10):
impacted generations to come. We have no idea what impact that
may have down the road to his kids and his kids, you know?
And so I think that's awesome. And then thinking about the
truth behind that, that, yes, suffering isn't pleasant.
And, you know, I think a lot of us spend our lives trying to
(25:30):
avoid it. If we're honest.
Nobody's like suffering. Sign me up for that, right?
You know, it's one of those things that we, we don't, we
don't appreciate until sometimeswhen we're going through it or a
lot of times looking back. And you know, we don't grow in
our comfort zones. We grow whenever we can't.
(25:53):
And here's something God's been teaching me lately too, is that,
you know, as long as I'm in control and as long as I can
control everything, as long as I'm comfortable, then I feel
like that's what I'm after. But you know what?
I don't have to rely on God during those times.
It's in those moments where I lose control and I realize just
how helpless I am. And I realized that, you know
(26:14):
what I don't? I'm not in control of any of
this stuff. I realized my need for the Lord
and and so, you know, suffering can bring about great growth in
our spiritual lives. And you said it right, if we let
it. If you, you had a decision, you
had a decision or I'm not going to let this take me this way or
(26:35):
let me take it this way. And and you know, at the time,
maybe you weren't thinking aboutyour son giving a speech when he
was 17, but you knew enough to think my decision is going to
impact them one way or another. Yeah.
And and so I love that you were able to think outside of
yourself. And I think God gives us that
ability because, you know, the Ithink we're born with this
(26:57):
nature that wants to think aboutme, myself and I this inward
bent on ourselves, if if you will.
But God gives us that ability through his spirit to be able to
say, you know, it's not all about me.
Let me look and see what, you know, what else this may affect.
And and so, man, I'm excited to to see your kids grow up and to
(27:19):
see it it and realizing at that age of nine that the presence of
God was in him. Yeah, the peace of God was in
him. When when I heard him say that,
like he, I mean most adults, they would freak out.
Right. Right, you know, like I, I was
going, I, I often go back or tryto think about what would I have
(27:44):
done if I were there. Yeah.
And here's my thinking. So knowing what I was done,
knowing what I did prior to the stroke.
Cause here the night that Michelle had her stroke, I was
actually had a fight. We were arguing and Sia told me
(28:04):
that she's never felt that anxious before.
Before that for that day she diddeal with anxiety, but she told
me before I left that I have never felt this anxious before
is what she told me. And then I, I prayed with her I
think. And I said I'm sorry Michelle, I
I gotta go to work. I was, I was running late.
(28:26):
So I remember praying with her and I kissed her for it.
Then I walked out of the door and the next thing I wanna saw
her is when she had after she had her show.
So, but before then, what I would have done if I were home
and she were stressed, I would probably have taken the kids
away from the house so that Michelle could have the quiet
time. And then if I had done that, I
(28:48):
might have come home to it. Right.
Right. You know, So God was allowing me
to be gone. Yeah.
For everything had to happen exactly the way it did in order
for us to wind up here we are now.
Yeah. Yeah.
And, you know, it's maybe a different path than you would
have chosen to walk, but it's one that's glorifying God every
(29:13):
step of the way. And I appreciate that about, you
know, some of the, some of the, I, I guess some of the things
that are important to you right now are, are telling your story
and providing people hope when they go through dark times,
finding the light in the tunnel.I like that.
But then it's also raising awareness about Moya Moya.
(29:33):
So can you tell us a little bit about that and how we can kind
of make people more aware of of that condition and maybe make it
to where someone else has it picked up a little sooner?
OK, so it started with headachesand headaches are really tough
for doctors to diagnose. I mean, they could be anything.
They could be migraine, they could be it could be stress.
(29:55):
But one thing that I want to sayis that, you know, after having
complaints of so many doctors over and over again and being
told that it's nothing, we kind of gave up, you know, 'cause
when you, when you do a complaining, you find out that
maybe it's something that I haveto live with.
(30:15):
We, we stopped. Yeah.
And what we're what we learned afterward is that if Michelle
had an MRA of the, of the brain.So it's an MRI with contrast.
Yeah. So if they were, if she would
have had the MRA, it would have picked up the Moy Moy.
(30:36):
Yeah. And then there's on the vessels,
so. That picks up, right?
Yeah. And then they she could have had
a surgery to correct it to prevent the stroke.
Yeah, and that's big. You know, in healthcare myself,
I understand how much you've gotto advocate for yourself
because, yeah, you know, the thesystem is, you know, it is what
(30:56):
it is. And you know, we have thoughts,
but that's a different conversation for a different
day. But you know it, it's a system
where you go in to see your doctor and they've got 20
minutes to see you and, you know, they're they're assessing
some things. And you're right.
Like headache is such a non general symptom.
It could be anything, especiallywith a woman, you know, it could
be cycle related, you know, justa lot of different things to.
(31:20):
But here's the thing. If if you're getting a gut
feeling that maybe there's something more than than what
I'm getting, you know, they're telling me, oh, it's fine.
It's normal that you just aren'tOK with that.
It's OK to it's OK to push back.It's OK.
It's OK to advocate for yourselfand it's OK to, you know, find
second opinions, third opinions or whatever you need, because I
(31:42):
hear stories like this a lot to where, you know, we go and we,
we think, OK, well, apparently I'm fine or apparently I've just
got to live with this. But you know that that's one
person's medical opinion. That doesn't mean that's the
gospel truth. And so trust that intuition in
yourself too, because a lot of times that might be the Holy
Spirit moving in you to kind of prompt you.
(32:04):
Maybe, maybe, maybe I need to push further and, and, and a lot
of people feel like that when wego to the doctor, you know,
that, that they're the expert and we know nothing.
And so I've got to do whatever they say and whatever they say
is right. Well, you know, there's a reason
they call it practicing medicine, because it's not, as
(32:25):
you know, it's not as cut and dry as you think.
That's you know. It is kind of an art.
And, you know, people are different.
Everyone's different. Everyone has a different makeup.
Everyone has different symptoms.And so, you know, that's one
person's medical opinion. But that doesn't make it the
only medical opinion out there. And so I love that.
(32:46):
Encouraging people to advocate for yourself.
Yeah. Thinking about family history
too is important, right? Exactly.
Yeah, with, with her grandmotherhaving this issue and you know,
of course, no definitive way to know, but yeah, I mean, that's
important to make sure that we're thinking back and like,
all right, a lot of these thingsare hereditary.
(33:06):
Yeah. And we actually, we got our kids
screened. So I had, I pushed for Mras for
all three of them and they're clear.
Good. So we're we're thankful for
that. But yeah, if the doctors had, I
was, I was actually digging through medical records after
the stroke just to see if there's something that could
have been done, something that was missed.
And, and when I when I read thatdoctor's note like I told you
(33:28):
about and the stroke was on the right side of her brain.
Deep, very specific mid. Exactly.
Very specific that she, the doctor didn't even describe
where it was happening. Yeah.
And the, and also another thing that happened with Michelle
after that, she was having fainting episodes, so much so
(33:49):
where the doctor ordered her to wear a halter, monitored her to
check her heart. Gotcha.
Which came back normal. Yeah, that wouldn't have showed
up. Yeah.
So what it was we're thinking isthat because what so the Moya
Moya while the the arteries are constricted is it was preventing
blood and oxygen to get to the brain.
(34:11):
And actually our our good friendVince Murdoch, I'm not sure if
you know he's AUFC fighter. OK, Yeah.
And he, he was actually right before one of his fights, he had
to get screened just to make sure he's cleared the fight.
And they found Moya Moya in him,so much so that he had 100%
blockage on one side of his brain and some symptoms.
(34:34):
I was talking with him the otherday.
He said some symptoms for him where he just felt like he
knows, he knows his body really well because he's such like a
hard athlete. Yeah.
But he started getting really tired and started getting more
fatigued. And that was like something
that. But again, he, he was thinking
that it was something else. Then he found out that was my
(34:56):
boy, and he was he. I was fortunate enough to have
the surgery before something happened.
Yeah, but Michelle was fainting.She was having these headaches.
So they're like all these red flags, but.
Well, and you know, it's, you can't go back and change it,
right. But but you know, what you can
(35:16):
do is raise awareness, Yeah. Make people aware of of this
rare disease and, and tell people to advocate for
themselves because you know what, you might save somebody
from having to go through or from, you know, from death or
from having to go through some of the things that that you've
gone through. But I'm going to ask you
something and go for it. Take it or leave it.
(35:40):
Would you change anything? That is a really hard question.
Yes and no. Yes, because I see how I was
back then. You know, my wife would come to
me about how burdened she was, like with the three kids, with
(36:05):
doing everything, with managing the finances, the grocery
shopping, doing all the things that she would come to me over
and over and over again. And I wouldn't, I wouldn't do
much to take things off her plate.
And it, it wasn't until afterward where I had no choice.
You know the term sink or swim. Well, we, we sunk for a while
(36:27):
Now we're like, we're trying to,we're, we're, we're treading
water and we're, we're doing ourbest to stay flow.
But it made me realize what I was actually doing.
And now I, I look for, for example, when you see a, a
couple at a grocery store who isusually the one leading the way
(36:50):
wife. And then when I'm looking, I'm
like, that was me. I was the passive one, letting
her do all of it. And then and even one of my, one
of my friends, right. He doesn't really manage the
calendar. You know, that's his life's job.
That was my life's job. My wife did all the planning.
(37:12):
She did the calendar, she did the package for the trips.
I have to do it. And it it's caused me to grow
and to become a better leader. Yeah, you know, And so yes, I
would change it to, you know, tohave so that she wouldn't should
she would have all of her faculties and she'd be able to
(37:33):
walk and but no, because it's helped me grow and to become the
person that God created me to be.
Yeah. So it's, yeah, two sides to the
same coin. I love that.
That's a fantastic answer and I've never asked that before on
a podcast. So I appreciate you.
I appreciate you being honest and, and, and just really
(37:54):
opening up to us today because you know, what we're trying to
say is that you know what life'snot, life doesn't go the way
that we want it to a lot of times.
And we're not in control of that.
As much as we like to think we are You, we don't have control
of that. What we do have control of is
how we respond. How we respond exactly?
(38:15):
Yeah, and brother, your faith through it all is inspiring, and
I appreciate you sharing that with my listeners today.
Even when life takes a turn and even when life looks different
than you would have ever dreamed, God is still.
God is still with you. There's one point that I want to
make So. And the Bible can be
(38:38):
misinterpreted a lot. So one verse that can be
misinterpreted is First Corinthians 10/13, which says no
temptation is overtaking you except, which is common to man.
But God is faithful. He will not allow you to be
tempted beyond what you are able, but with a temptation, he
will give you a way of escape sothat you can endure it.
(38:59):
And a lot of people look at thatverse and say, well that means
that God won't allow me to go through anything more than I can
handle. And we hear that a lot, don't
we? God won't give you more than
give you handle. But if God would not allow you
to go through anything more thanyou can handle, then what's the
point of having Him if you can handle everything on your own,
(39:20):
right? But and.
It's that's powerful. And by and Paul in Corinthians,
he talks about being like near death, like wanting, like
because he's been shipwrecked, he's been taken prisoner to the
point of wanting to die, right? Like he's suffering that much.
And then he says that because myweakness is like his strength is
(39:47):
proven to my weakness. I'm not saying it correctly, but
the point is like God's power ismade aware by our weakness, by
our our struggle. Yeah.
So that we can point him and sayit's not us, so that there's no
boasting in us, but it's power, it's power of God in US that
helps us to get through those times.
(40:08):
Yeah, yeah, I love every bit of that.
That's extremely, extremely powerful.
And I see that in your son, who says it wasn't me.
Yeah, I know. It wasn't me.
It was him. So, yeah, it's a lie.
God won't give you more than youcan handle.
Yes, he will. He will.
Other. Otherwise, what's the point,
right? Why do we need him if we can
(40:31):
handle it all? But here's the thing.
We we don't realize a lot of times how much we need him until
we got to have him. Yeah.
And then when we rely solely on him, he comes through every
time. And it doesn't mean he changes
our circumstances. I want to make that clear, too.
Sometimes he does deliver us from our circumstances.
A lot of times he delivers us through our circumstances.
(40:52):
Sometimes he makes you find the light while in the tunnel.
Amen. Amen.
You. Know that's why I wrote this
book because some people they don't see that trial ending and
they feel like there's no like there's no hope but there there
is and you know the hope is Jesus while you while you're
going into that tunnel so. Man, so good.
(41:16):
Well, Brett, tell us, tell us where we can find your book.
If anybody out here wants to getget in contact with you, if
they're moved by your story or encouraged by your story, how
can they reach you? How can they get into your
world? So I have a website for my book.
It's at hopeundeferred.com. But I've also started something
called The Faithful Man's Journey because while I've been,
(41:39):
you know, talking with a lot of people, especially as X-rays I
got when I was working there, I,I talked to a lot of people and
some people their, their husbands left after their wives
had a stroke or some sort of illness.
And that happens a lot. Yeah.
So they in, you know, they decide to go the wrong way of
the fork in the road. So I created the faithful man's
(42:01):
dream. There's a document and I have a
a six day challenge leading to amen's Bible study that happens
on Friday mornings at 8:00 AM Pacific.
Awesome. So I've kind of given.
So if people are like strugglingto find their own community, I
have one for them that I can plug into.
(42:22):
So if you can go to faithfulmansjourney.com and then
get the playbook that I've created, which will help them
lead towards get on discovery call with me.
And then they can get on the getplugged into that men's call
where we really, you know, help men sharpen each other.
Yeah, as iron sharpens iron, oneman sharpens another, right?
(42:43):
Exactly, Yeah. Well, thanks, Brett.
I'm going to put all those linksin the show notes, but keep
doing great things, man. You're doing tremendous work for
the Kingdom and your story is encouraging, and I just wish
nothing but blessings on you andyour family.
And man, if I can help you guys at all, you reach out.
But you guys check out Brett, the work he's doing, pick up his
(43:05):
book. It's going to be a great source
of encouragement for you, man. Just keep being great for the
Kingdom. All right.
Appreciate it brother. Thank you for listening to the
Rev RX Podcast. We hope you enjoyed what you
heard today and if so, we'd loveit if you would hit that
subscribe button so that you'll never miss a new episode from
us. Also, feel free to leave us
(43:25):
reviews and comments as we'd love to hear from you.
Be blessed and be the very best you.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.