April 2, 2025 • 26 mins
TXT us your feedback!! <3 your fayce!
This episode is your invitation to stop spiraling in burnout and start stepping into your power—one beautiful task at a time.
It’s Riva’s birthday week, and instead of just celebrating with cake and candles, she’s showing up with a bold gift for every nurse who’s drowning in chaos, mental overload, and the crushing pressure to do it all.
In this special solo episode of The Ritual Nurse Podcast, we’re talking about one of the most overlooked roots of burnout in nursing today: the constant weight of disorganized mental tasks, emotional clutter, and invisible labor. Nurses aren’t just exhausted—we’re overloaded. And that’s exactly where The List comes in.
The List is a unique and powerful, printable and digital-friendly organization tool built specifically to address overload for high-capacity humans. It’s simple, it’s intuitive, and it reprograms your stress response by helping your brain perceive clarity, control, and calm—without adding more to your plate.
Riva walks you through how to use The List to reclaim your time, your peace, and your boundaries. You'll learn how this ritual planning system taps into neuroscience, nervous system regulation, and real nurse-life flexibility.
There’s a free version of The List available now on the shop page at tcth.org, the home of The Code Team’s educational hub. It's ready to download, use, and ritualize immediately.
But here's the birthday secret:
As a podcast listener, you’ll also get a special code during the episode to unlock one of Riva’s premium digital designs for free. These exclusive versions are designed for both digital note-taking apps (like Goodnotes or Notability) and printable use. They’re beautiful, simple, effective, and made to make you actually want to organize your life.
If you’re ready to stop reacting and start healing—with systems that meet your spirit—this episode is your spark.
Listen now. Download your gift. Use your code.
Then tag @the_code_team and show us your List in action. Let’s start a new ritual together.
Hey! Make sure you subscribe to stay connected. Love a nurse? Who doesn't! Share with all the nurses you know. The more we reach, the more we help. We feel like no one deserves center stage focus more than nurses and our mission is to reach the millions of superstars out there. We'd love to hear your stories, your adventures, your wins, and especially your needs and questions! Email us at hello@ritualnurse (dot) com. Also, you can send us fan mail! Use the link at the beginning of the show notes. Resources, classes, blogs, and podcast info can be found on our home site at TCTH.org. The Ritual Nurse Podcast is part of The Code Team educational platform.
Love your FAYCES!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hello besties, welcome back to the Ritual Nurse
Podcast, your sacred littlecorner of the universe where we
mix healing humor and hardcorenursing realness.
I'm your host, reva, and I'mback from a short but
much-needed break becausedrumroll, please it was my
birthday last week.
Aries energy activated.
(00:23):
So I did the radical thing Iput myself first.
That's right.
I skipped an episode, becausesometimes real is the ritual.
You know, I couldn't stay awayfor long and also I've got a
gift for you.
So today's episode is partbirthday special, part burnout
buster and part sacred rest.
If your brain feels like it's ato-do list on fire, this episode
(00:46):
is for you.
This is a little birthdayspecial called the birthday
burnout cure, and we're going totalk about something that's
wrecking nurses in silence andit's mental cognitive overload,
and we're going to talk abouthow we can get out of it, not
with perfection, but with ritualand organization.
Out of it, not with perfection,but with ritual and
(01:08):
organization.
But wait, Reva, why did you sayperfection?
Because and I hold your hand sokindly as I say this I'm
calling you out.
You know we try to just do moreand do it perfectly.
The more overwhelmed we get,the higher the overwhelm, the
more focused on perfectionism weget.
It's giving that false sense ofcontrol we thrive on.
So if you're feeling like yourbrain is spaghetti, half
(01:30):
charting, half chaos, 100%cooked, this episode is your
rescue rope Plus.
I've made a little something,something for you that is going
to help you breathe again, andyou'll get it at the end of the
show.
So now that I've just read allof us to filth, let's do this.
So let's talk about overwhelm.
You ever feel like your brainis 47 browser tabs open and one
(01:52):
of them is playing music and youcan't figure out which.
That's our life, right?
Our mental load isn't justclinical.
It's everything we're carryingunfinished charts, emotional
trauma from patient deaths,staff texts and meetings, family
drama, personal needs and thatcreeping feeling that we're
forgetting something vital, likeyou know food and water, sleep
(02:19):
and I know you can't see me, butI'm also gesturing wildly at
everything else going on rightnow and we just keep pushing
because we were taught thatbeing productive equals being
worthy.
But let me hit you with thisit's not your fault.
The system is broken and youdeserve better.
So let's get real for a second.
(02:40):
One of the biggest problems Isee in nursing mental health,
especially right now, is thisunspoken expectation that we
have to do it all.
We're not just showing up atwork.
We're showing up with fullemotional labor, patients in
crisis, families in chaos, shortstaffing, zero breaks, and then
we go home and have to functionas full humans.
(03:02):
There's no space, there's nomargin.
There's no margin, there's noreset.
What we're experiencing isn'tjust burnout from work.
It's cognitive overload, it'sdecision fatigue, it's the
mental toll of carrying too manyunchecked boxes in our heads.
Look, I get that.
We are Olympic level at this.
(03:24):
We remember to reorder Ativan,bring snacks for our diabetic
coworker, check on our suicidalpatient and also order our kids
prom dress or make thosereservations for Bestie's
graduation situation, and that'sjust the first line of things
on our mental to-do list.
So just because we have hulkedit into, if it looks like can-do
(03:44):
shape, why no can can doeverything doesn't mean it's
okay, it's too much.
So let's get quick for a minutehere with actual science.
You see, this tool that Icreated is a legitimate thing,
and I want you to understand whyit works and what it's going to
do for you so that you actuallyuse it.
It's that impactful and thatmeaningful.
(04:08):
Studies show that cognitiveoverload directly contributes to
emotional exhaustion, reducedresilience and even physical
symptoms like insomnia and GIdistress.
And when our brains arecluttered, we can't access our
critical thinking, ourcompassion or our joy can't
(04:30):
access our critical thinking,our compassion or our joy.
So the cognitive offloadingthat we do decreases stress
hormones.
And what do I mean by that?
Well, when you write out ororganize your task load, your
mental load, like with this tool, you reduce what's called your
cognitive load, your mental load, like with this tool, you
reduce what's called yourcognitive load, the number of
(04:51):
items that your working memoryis trying to juggle.
And studies show thatoffloading tasks to a physical
or digital system reducesamygdala activity, the part of
your brain triggers stressresponses.
When the brain perceivesstructure and control, it
releases less cortisol, thebody's primary stress hormone,
and so categorizing tasksactivates the dorsolateral
prefrontal cortex, that's thepart of your brain responsible
(05:14):
for executive function,organization, problem solving
and long-term planning.
So organizing your day, the waythat this tool does, into
time-bound, actionable groupsgives the brain predictable
control, which is one of the keypsychological elements of
resilience.
This re-engagement with theprefrontal cortex reduces the
(05:35):
dominance of emotional reactivepathways, aka our limbic system,
allowing more thoughtful,balanced responses to stress.
Allowing more thoughtful,balanced responses to stress and
feeling in control of yourtasks, even if you don't finish
everything, has a measurableimpact on emotional health, not
(06:00):
perfection, just beautifulprogress.
Nurses with higher levels ofperceived control through task
management ritual orprioritization report
significantly lower rates ofburnout and emotional exhaustion
.
Having a clear system like thistool taps into internal locus
of control, which is one of thestrongest predictors of
psychological resilience.
Systems like the one I'm givingyou are more than
(06:21):
organizational.
They're ritual, and ritualbuilds predictability, which
calms the autonomic nervoussystem, especially the
overactive, sympathetic fight orflight response.
Creating a daily ritual aroundorganizing your workload tells
your body you are safe, you aresupported, you are in control.
(06:42):
This engages yourparasympathetic regulation and
it increases your ability tobounce back from stress.
And every decision that we makecosts energy.
Organizing tasks intostructured timeliness and
categories reduces the number ofdaily micro decisions, leaving
(07:03):
more mental energy for emotionalregulation, compassion,
reflection.
With fewer open tabs in yourbrain, you build the cognitive
space needed for recovery andadaptive resilience.
Let me tell you a quick story.
When I became a supervisor, Ialso was still taking full
(07:23):
patient loads.
I was also a single mom and inschool, full-time, finishing
degree number three, I foundthat I felt like such a failure
in every single direction.
I felt like I could barelyperform at a mediocre level in
any aspect of responsibilitythat I held and it was
absolutely killing me.
But I wasn't failing, I wasjust overwhelmed.
(07:46):
I know I've talked about itbefore, but as somebody with
ADHD, I also can't plug intosystems and habits and
structures that require so muchdopamine to start and maintain
that I can't even get past stepone.
I needed something I could dothat didn't add to the overwhelm
, didn't require a life rewriteand upend all the structure and
(08:08):
habits that were working alreadyfor me.
I just needed something tomanage the overwhelm I was
currently experiencing.
So I created the first versionof the tool that I'm gifting you
today.
The final version, which iswhat you're getting, I perfected
when I became a nurse executiveand my workload exploded.
I was also still in schoolfull-time, but this time at the
(08:31):
graduate level.
That story isn't rare.
That's a normal experience forso many of us, but it shouldn't
have to be so today I'm going togive you something to help you
fight back against the sensationand just messy chaos of
overwhelm and when you look athow to prioritize and how to set
(08:56):
task timelines, and we're goingto get into this after the
break, when I explain to you howto use the tool.
After the break, when Iexplained to you how to use the
tool, you'll see that, no matterwhat your situation whether
you're a nurse, another type ofhealthcare provider, a busy
executive, an overwhelmed busystay-at-home mom, stay-at-home
parent you'll find that thistool can be adapted just simply
(09:22):
with the type of task you put onit.
You don't have to rewrite it,you don't have to configure it.
It will just work.
And it'll work for anysituation that you find yourself
in, regardless of your job,regardless of what's causing the
overwhelm, because of thecognitive structure in the
methodology of how it works.
(09:43):
So, right about now, if you'relistening on your break or
driving to shift, you guys knowhere comes the music and this is
your pause point.
So come back when you're readyto learn how to take your life
back, one task at a time.
But if you're ready to get yourbrain back and feel even
(10:07):
slightly more sane tomorrow,keep listening, because now I'm
going to give you my personalritual that I use to get out of
overwhelm.
So let's get started withtalking about the tool itself.
I created this tool years ago asa new nurse executive.
I had to have somethingtangible to get my hands on, and
the earlier version that I hadmade when I first become a
(10:31):
supervisor that was more digitalbased and it was adding on the
structures that I developed whenI was in nursing school as a
single mom and trying to survivethat.
So this is really kind of likethe third iteration of this tool
.
This is really kind of like thethird iteration of this tool,
but I needed something tangiblebecause digital is one thing.
That system I perfected, got itto work for me and it still
(10:54):
works for me to this day.
But I needed something tangiblebecause I was always going in
and out of meetings in which Icouldn't be buried in my device.
I needed to have somethingphysical in front of me, like a
notepad or a piece of paper.
I also needed to keep somethingon my desk that I could touch
base with when I was using myother devices to do something
(11:14):
else.
And the way that this tool worksI don't know.
Someday in the future I mightdevelop an app that's based on
it, but it really needs to beeither a physical notepad can
even be sticky notes or adigital notepad.
It needs to be somethingtangible and the whole thing
(11:36):
needs to be visual at once.
No, I had to have somethingtangible, like I said, to make
sense of the chaos of nursingand running a hospital along
with motherhood life andfull-time school, and it had to
be one shot eyes on whole toolall at once, no multiple pages,
(11:57):
no things to click on.
It just had to work and this isa ritual to-do list.
But this is not your averagechecklist.
I made this for myself and Iwant to give it to you.
It's simple, it's beautiful.
It is a special four categoryorganization system for everyday
chaos, extraordinary chaos.
It'll even work for things likewedding planning, trip planning
(12:21):
, estate planning, any type oforganizational overwhelm that
you have.
This tool will work.
So the categories they're awhole vibe.
As soon as I start getting intoit, you're going to start
seeing why it works.
So there's four categories.
The first one is yes and thisis a do within 24 hours.
(12:41):
This is your non-negotiablelist.
Think things like give medsclock in on time non-negotiable
list.
Think things like give medsclock in on time.
Text your kid's teacher,breathe, take your own meds.
So keep this list tiny.
Okay, these are the immediatefires.
This is where you get realhonest what actually needs to
(13:04):
happen today, like if it doesn'thappen today within the next 24
hours, there's going to beserious consequences.
That's what goes on the yeslist.
The next category is next andthis is do it within 48 to 72
hours.
These are important but noturgent.
This is the simmering pot Chartaudits, calling grandma,
renewing your BLS.
You know, making thatappointment, not a fire, but it
(13:27):
still needs your energy soon.
Set it up, renew that license,respond to that work email,
clean out your bag of shiftsnacks that expired, that kind
of stuff.
And once I get through thecategories, I'll kind of explain
how they interact and you'llsee how, once you set the system
(13:49):
up, how it starts to work.
But the next category, the thirdone, is called pass.
This is where you delegate itto somebody else.
So this one, this one's a gamechanger.
This is where we reclaim ourtime.
This is where you ask for help.
These are your future, youkindnesses.
This is your boundaries section.
This is also the section thatgives people the most grief
(14:15):
trying to learn how to use it.
It's a skill set and withpractice you develop it and you
become stronger at it.
You got to do it in order tomaster it, but this is
definitely the game changer.
So what can be handed off?
Things like asking a coworkerto grab the vitals, let your
(14:35):
partner handle dinner, giveyourself permission to not be
the hero.
This is where you're going todelete.
The mental tab says do it allyourself, pry your fingertips
off of the task list anddelegate things that can be
delegated to other people.
This is what goes on that list,and once you put them on this
(14:58):
list, they leave all other areasof your to-do list.
The last category is calledgoodbye list.
The last category is calledgoodbye this.
You remove it from your list,remove it from your mind.
This one this one's the realritual part.
This one, second only to thepass section, is the hardest one
for people.
(15:19):
This is where you let go ofthings that you can't control.
This is where you let go ofthings that honestly don't need
to be done by you or somebodyelse.
These are things that you canactually just cross off your
list, like the text that youhaven't responded to because you
don't have the emotionalbandwidth, but deep down inside
(15:39):
you know it doesn't deserve aresponse.
Yep, that one, and things likethe toxic work convo that you
keep replaying.
Say goodbye, you write it down,you cross it out and you say
goodbye.
You relinquish it from thatoverwhelming list that's
(16:00):
burdening you down.
So when you organize your lifethis way, even if it's just once
a week, you stop reacting andyou start ritualizing.
You become the nurse whoresponds and not just survives.
You're not living in areactionary state, you are
controlling with predictability.
Remember how we were talking inthe science section before.
You're giving yourself thatpredictable control.
(16:21):
Now, the one thing I will say isthat making this a ritual in
the morning or whenever you doyour best planning my night
shifters you know it might beearly evening before you head
into work allows you to actuallytrigger the system and let it
work.
So your yes and next thoseactually work in tandem together
(16:45):
.
Your yes list is due within 24hours.
You cross off the things thatyou need to get done and if you
can get to something on yournext list, if you have the
mental capacity, the energy, thefinances, the time, whatever it
may be, if you can get tosomething on it, great.
If not, your next listautomatically shifts forward.
(17:08):
So the things that are on yournext list that are more time
sensitive.
They're closer to the 48 hourmark.
They become your new yes list.
You add that to your yes listfor the next following day and
the longer term.
Next items that are closer to 72stay on your next list, and
(17:29):
this keeps you from worryingabout something falling to the
cracks.
This keeps you from constantlydoing that mental replay where
you shuffle through all of yourto-do lists like some absolutely
messed up 687 card pickup cardgame.
It keeps you from having to dothat because you're going to
(17:53):
keep things on your list andshuffle them forward as
necessary, cross them off, andthe good thing about it is that
as you review these things, youstart to discover you know what.
This one isn't critical becauseI actually could delegate it to
somebody else or man.
This one is sitting out at the72 hour section in my next list
(18:15):
and I don't actually care if Iget to it.
Is this a good buy one?
And you really start to be ableto honestly prioritize what to
devote your attention to andwhat not to, what actually
deserves your precious energyand what doesn't.
So the list isn't about doingmore.
It's about doing what mattersand letting go of the rest.
(18:39):
So I've made this tooldownloadable for you.
It is beautiful and completelyfree.
You can download the freeversion of the list right now.
The link is in the show notes.
So if you're on Apple Podcasts,if you're on Spotify, in the
show notes you'll see thatthere's actual clickable links,
one of which is at the top andallows you to text me feedback,
(19:02):
hint hint, and the other one isgoing to be a link to the actual
download of the free version ofthe list.
So it's clean, beautiful,designed for maximum impact.
You can print it, you can useit in good notes or notability,
you can slap it on your fridgelike a sacred sticky note from
the universe, if that's what youwant.
But if you want to level it up,oh bestie.
(19:23):
I designed multiple gorgeousversions.
I'm talking florals, lunarvibes, soft gradients like
chef's kiss, adorable, maybeeven some mermaids in there.
And because you're herelistening to the podcast, you
can access one of them for free.
So you're going to go to thecode team hub, which is tcthorg,
click on the shop, browse tothe templates, pick one you love
(19:45):
and use the code birthdayritual at checkout and it's
going to unlock one of thosepremium versions on me.
So let that be your birthdaygift from me to you.
Go, get cute and organized.
So let's close this out withour favorite healing trio.
So our coffee crystal anddivination section Feels weird
(20:06):
not to have done it for twoweeks, but this week, with my
coffee, we're off Whole30.
We survived Whole30.
And I'm still doing thedairy-free version, still
hanging out with the nut pods,although I am using the cookie
butter one that has some steviain it, and I've got to say
whether it's iced, whether it'shot.
(20:26):
For me, right now, nut pods arewhere it's at.
My really good friend Brennanis laughing hysterically right
now because I used to abhor them.
Whole30 does weird things toyour taste buds.
When you eliminate crap andtoxins and start putting some
clean food in your mouth, it'skind of incredible.
(20:47):
One of the ways that you canduplicate this, though, whether
it's with half and half or oatmilk, is looking for something
that is hazelnut flavored andadding a little bit of caramel
to it.
Just enjoy the sweet treat.
As far as your coffee of theweek this week, it's a weird
week, with the eclipse going on,we've got planets in retrograde
(21:09):
and again gesturing wildly ateverything around.
So just, you deserve peace.
Sip on something soothing,lovely, awesome cup of coffee
decaf regular who are we kidding?
Ultra-caffeined and just enjoy.
You deserve peace.
(21:31):
So ritualize that.
Enjoy it every morning as youuse your brand new tool and get
used to working with the systemagain.
The tool is not going to requirea lot of overwhelming effort.
The whole reason behind itsdesign was I couldn't utilize
something that was just going toadd to the overwhelm.
(21:52):
It had to be something thatdidn't require extra dopamine.
So this week, with your coffeeof the week, with your sweet
treat that you're sipping ongetting ready for your day or
your evening shift, whatever itmight be, utilize your list,
your yes, next pass and goodbye.
Let's look at our crystalprescription and we're going to
(22:17):
pull this out.
So this week's crystal isfluorite.
This is kind of an organizer ofthe mineral world.
It helps clear mental fog,organize thoughts and stabilize
emotional energy.
This is a leadership stone.
So fluorite and having it inyour vicinity really kind of
helps you assimilate and kind oftake on that leadership energy,
(22:40):
which is literally exactly whatyou need to do when it comes to
using this tool, taking controlof your overwhelm and giving
yourself some mental peace.
Okay, so keep it on your deskin your pocket bracelet.
You know the drill.
So divination, reading our tarotcard for this week, I pulled
the Knight of Pentacles.
(23:00):
For this week, I pulled theKnight of Pentacles.
So the Knight of Pentacles, yes, we're on a journey, but this
is slow and steady.
This is focused effort.
This card says you don't haveto do everything at once.
You just have to take the nextstep and even resting counts.
Remember what I said earlierwe're not doing this by
(23:22):
perfection.
This is just beautiful progress.
So we're not focused onperfection.
We're not focused on decisionfatigue and getting locked up
and overwhelmed.
We are focused on continual,steady progress forward Every
single time you check off one ofthose boxes on your list.
(23:43):
That's beautiful progress.
All right, friends.
That is it for this week'sRitual Nurse birthday special.
I hope this episode gave you amoment to pause to breathe.
Remember that you don't have tocarry the weight of the world.
So grab your list from the shownotes, use the code to get a
second gorgeous little templateas a gift and make your list of
(24:06):
ritual that you actually lookforward to.
Snap a pic and tag me at theritual nurse so we can all
inspire each other to stopdrowning and start organizing.
Next week, we're going to kickoff a new mini series on time
boundaries, because saying no isa sacred act, and I'm going to
teach you how to do it withpower.
Take care of yourself first,always Ritualize your rest,
(24:30):
protect your peace and rememberyou are the healer, not the
martyr, and, as always, loveyour faces.
Hello besties, welcome back to the Ritual Nurse
Podcast, your sacred littlecorner of the universe where we
mix healing humor and hardcorenursing realness.
I'm your host, reva, and I'mback from a short but
much-needed break becausedrumroll, please it was my
birthday last week.
Aries energy activated.
(00:23):
So I did the radical thing Iput myself first.
That's right.
I skipped an episode, becausesometimes real is the ritual.
You know, I couldn't stay awayfor long and also I've got a
gift for you.
So today's episode is partbirthday special, part burnout
buster and part sacred rest.
If your brain feels like it's ato-do list on fire, this episode
(00:46):
is for you.
This is a little birthdayspecial called the birthday
burnout cure, and we're going totalk about something that's
wrecking nurses in silence andit's mental cognitive overload,
and we're going to talk abouthow we can get out of it, not
with perfection, but with ritualand organization.
Out of it, not with perfection,but with ritual and
(01:08):
organization.
But wait, Reva, why did you sayperfection?
Because and I hold your hand sokindly as I say this I'm
calling you out.
You know we try to just do moreand do it perfectly.
The more overwhelmed we get,the higher the overwhelm, the
more focused on perfectionism weget.
It's giving that false sense ofcontrol we thrive on.
So if you're feeling like yourbrain is spaghetti, half
(01:30):
charting, half chaos, 100%cooked, this episode is your
rescue rope Plus.
I've made a little something,something for you that is going
to help you breathe again, andyou'll get it at the end of the
show.
So now that I've just read allof us to filth, let's do this.
So let's talk about overwhelm.
You ever feel like your brainis 47 browser tabs open and one
(01:52):
of them is playing music and youcan't figure out which.
That's our life, right?
Our mental load isn't justclinical.
It's everything we're carryingunfinished charts, emotional
trauma from patient deaths,staff texts and meetings, family
drama, personal needs and thatcreeping feeling that we're
forgetting something vital, likeyou know food and water, sleep
(02:19):
and I know you can't see me, butI'm also gesturing wildly at
everything else going on rightnow and we just keep pushing
because we were taught thatbeing productive equals being
worthy.
But let me hit you with thisit's not your fault.
The system is broken and youdeserve better.
So let's get real for a second.
(02:40):
One of the biggest problems Isee in nursing mental health,
especially right now, is thisunspoken expectation that we
have to do it all.
We're not just showing up atwork.
We're showing up with fullemotional labor, patients in
crisis, families in chaos, shortstaffing, zero breaks, and then
we go home and have to functionas full humans.
(03:02):
There's no space, there's nomargin.
There's no margin, there's noreset.
What we're experiencing isn'tjust burnout from work.
It's cognitive overload, it'sdecision fatigue, it's the
mental toll of carrying too manyunchecked boxes in our heads.
Look, I get that.
We are Olympic level at this.
(03:24):
We remember to reorder Ativan,bring snacks for our diabetic
coworker, check on our suicidalpatient and also order our kids
prom dress or make thosereservations for Bestie's
graduation situation, and that'sjust the first line of things
on our mental to-do list.
So just because we have hulkedit into, if it looks like can-do
(03:44):
shape, why no can can doeverything doesn't mean it's
okay, it's too much.
So let's get quick for a minutehere with actual science.
You see, this tool that Icreated is a legitimate thing,
and I want you to understand whyit works and what it's going to
do for you so that you actuallyuse it.
It's that impactful and thatmeaningful.
(04:08):
Studies show that cognitiveoverload directly contributes to
emotional exhaustion, reducedresilience and even physical
symptoms like insomnia and GIdistress.
And when our brains arecluttered, we can't access our
critical thinking, ourcompassion or our joy can't
(04:30):
access our critical thinking,our compassion or our joy.
So the cognitive offloadingthat we do decreases stress
hormones.
And what do I mean by that?
Well, when you write out ororganize your task load, your
mental load, like with this tool, you reduce what's called your
cognitive load, your mental load, like with this tool, you
reduce what's called yourcognitive load, the number of
(04:51):
items that your working memoryis trying to juggle.
And studies show thatoffloading tasks to a physical
or digital system reducesamygdala activity, the part of
your brain triggers stressresponses.
When the brain perceivesstructure and control, it
releases less cortisol, thebody's primary stress hormone,
and so categorizing tasksactivates the dorsolateral
prefrontal cortex, that's thepart of your brain responsible
(05:14):
for executive function,organization, problem solving
and long-term planning.
So organizing your day, the waythat this tool does, into
time-bound, actionable groupsgives the brain predictable
control, which is one of the keypsychological elements of
resilience.
This re-engagement with theprefrontal cortex reduces the
(05:35):
dominance of emotional reactivepathways, aka our limbic system,
allowing more thoughtful,balanced responses to stress.
Allowing more thoughtful,balanced responses to stress and
feeling in control of yourtasks, even if you don't finish
everything, has a measurableimpact on emotional health, not
(06:00):
perfection, just beautifulprogress.
Nurses with higher levels ofperceived control through task
management ritual orprioritization report
significantly lower rates ofburnout and emotional exhaustion
.
Having a clear system like thistool taps into internal locus
of control, which is one of thestrongest predictors of
psychological resilience.
Systems like the one I'm givingyou are more than
(06:21):
organizational.
They're ritual, and ritualbuilds predictability, which
calms the autonomic nervoussystem, especially the
overactive, sympathetic fight orflight response.
Creating a daily ritual aroundorganizing your workload tells
your body you are safe, you aresupported, you are in control.
(06:42):
This engages yourparasympathetic regulation and
it increases your ability tobounce back from stress.
And every decision that we makecosts energy.
Organizing tasks intostructured timeliness and
categories reduces the number ofdaily micro decisions, leaving
(07:03):
more mental energy for emotionalregulation, compassion,
reflection.
With fewer open tabs in yourbrain, you build the cognitive
space needed for recovery andadaptive resilience.
Let me tell you a quick story.
When I became a supervisor, Ialso was still taking full
(07:23):
patient loads.
I was also a single mom and inschool, full-time, finishing
degree number three, I foundthat I felt like such a failure
in every single direction.
I felt like I could barelyperform at a mediocre level in
any aspect of responsibilitythat I held and it was
absolutely killing me.
But I wasn't failing, I wasjust overwhelmed.
(07:46):
I know I've talked about itbefore, but as somebody with
ADHD, I also can't plug intosystems and habits and
structures that require so muchdopamine to start and maintain
that I can't even get past stepone.
I needed something I could dothat didn't add to the overwhelm
, didn't require a life rewriteand upend all the structure and
(08:08):
habits that were working alreadyfor me.
I just needed something tomanage the overwhelm I was
currently experiencing.
So I created the first versionof the tool that I'm gifting you
today.
The final version, which iswhat you're getting, I perfected
when I became a nurse executiveand my workload exploded.
I was also still in schoolfull-time, but this time at the
(08:31):
graduate level.
That story isn't rare.
That's a normal experience forso many of us, but it shouldn't
have to be so today I'm going togive you something to help you
fight back against the sensationand just messy chaos of
overwhelm and when you look athow to prioritize and how to set
(08:56):
task timelines, and we're goingto get into this after the
break, when I explain to you howto use the tool.
After the break, when Iexplained to you how to use the
tool, you'll see that, no matterwhat your situation whether
you're a nurse, another type ofhealthcare provider, a busy
executive, an overwhelmed busystay-at-home mom, stay-at-home
parent you'll find that thistool can be adapted just simply
(09:22):
with the type of task you put onit.
You don't have to rewrite it,you don't have to configure it.
It will just work.
And it'll work for anysituation that you find yourself
in, regardless of your job,regardless of what's causing the
overwhelm, because of thecognitive structure in the
methodology of how it works.
(09:43):
So, right about now, if you'relistening on your break or
driving to shift, you guys knowhere comes the music and this is
your pause point.
So come back when you're readyto learn how to take your life
back, one task at a time.
But if you're ready to get yourbrain back and feel even
(10:07):
slightly more sane tomorrow,keep listening, because now I'm
going to give you my personalritual that I use to get out of
overwhelm.
So let's get started withtalking about the tool itself.
I created this tool years ago asa new nurse executive.
I had to have somethingtangible to get my hands on, and
the earlier version that I hadmade when I first become a
(10:31):
supervisor that was more digitalbased and it was adding on the
structures that I developed whenI was in nursing school as a
single mom and trying to survivethat.
So this is really kind of likethe third iteration of this tool
.
This is really kind of like thethird iteration of this tool,
but I needed something tangiblebecause digital is one thing.
That system I perfected, got itto work for me and it still
(10:54):
works for me to this day.
But I needed something tangiblebecause I was always going in
and out of meetings in which Icouldn't be buried in my device.
I needed to have somethingphysical in front of me, like a
notepad or a piece of paper.
I also needed to keep somethingon my desk that I could touch
base with when I was using myother devices to do something
(11:14):
else.
And the way that this tool worksI don't know.
Someday in the future I mightdevelop an app that's based on
it, but it really needs to beeither a physical notepad can
even be sticky notes or adigital notepad.
It needs to be somethingtangible and the whole thing
(11:36):
needs to be visual at once.
No, I had to have somethingtangible, like I said, to make
sense of the chaos of nursingand running a hospital along
with motherhood life andfull-time school, and it had to
be one shot eyes on whole toolall at once, no multiple pages,
(11:57):
no things to click on.
It just had to work and this isa ritual to-do list.
But this is not your averagechecklist.
I made this for myself and Iwant to give it to you.
It's simple, it's beautiful.
It is a special four categoryorganization system for everyday
chaos, extraordinary chaos.
It'll even work for things likewedding planning, trip planning
(12:21):
, estate planning, any type oforganizational overwhelm that
you have.
This tool will work.
So the categories they're awhole vibe.
As soon as I start getting intoit, you're going to start
seeing why it works.
So there's four categories.
The first one is yes and thisis a do within 24 hours.
(12:41):
This is your non-negotiablelist.
Think things like give medsclock in on time non-negotiable
list.
Think things like give medsclock in on time.
Text your kid's teacher,breathe, take your own meds.
So keep this list tiny.
Okay, these are the immediatefires.
This is where you get realhonest what actually needs to
(13:04):
happen today, like if it doesn'thappen today within the next 24
hours, there's going to beserious consequences.
That's what goes on the yeslist.
The next category is next andthis is do it within 48 to 72
hours.
These are important but noturgent.
This is the simmering pot Chartaudits, calling grandma,
renewing your BLS.
You know, making thatappointment, not a fire, but it
(13:27):
still needs your energy soon.
Set it up, renew that license,respond to that work email,
clean out your bag of shiftsnacks that expired, that kind
of stuff.
And once I get through thecategories, I'll kind of explain
how they interact and you'llsee how, once you set the system
(13:49):
up, how it starts to work.
But the next category, the thirdone, is called pass.
This is where you delegate itto somebody else.
So this one, this one's a gamechanger.
This is where we reclaim ourtime.
This is where you ask for help.
These are your future, youkindnesses.
This is your boundaries section.
This is also the section thatgives people the most grief
(14:15):
trying to learn how to use it.
It's a skill set and withpractice you develop it and you
become stronger at it.
You got to do it in order tomaster it, but this is
definitely the game changer.
So what can be handed off?
Things like asking a coworkerto grab the vitals, let your
(14:35):
partner handle dinner, giveyourself permission to not be
the hero.
This is where you're going todelete.
The mental tab says do it allyourself, pry your fingertips
off of the task list anddelegate things that can be
delegated to other people.
This is what goes on that list,and once you put them on this
(14:58):
list, they leave all other areasof your to-do list.
The last category is calledgoodbye list.
The last category is calledgoodbye this.
You remove it from your list,remove it from your mind.
This one this one's the realritual part.
This one, second only to thepass section, is the hardest one
for people.
(15:19):
This is where you let go ofthings that you can't control.
This is where you let go ofthings that honestly don't need
to be done by you or somebodyelse.
These are things that you canactually just cross off your
list, like the text that youhaven't responded to because you
don't have the emotionalbandwidth, but deep down inside
(15:39):
you know it doesn't deserve aresponse.
Yep, that one, and things likethe toxic work convo that you
keep replaying.
Say goodbye, you write it down,you cross it out and you say
goodbye.
You relinquish it from thatoverwhelming list that's
(16:00):
burdening you down.
So when you organize your lifethis way, even if it's just once
a week, you stop reacting andyou start ritualizing.
You become the nurse whoresponds and not just survives.
You're not living in areactionary state, you are
controlling with predictability.
Remember how we were talking inthe science section before.
You're giving yourself thatpredictable control.
(16:21):
Now, the one thing I will say isthat making this a ritual in
the morning or whenever you doyour best planning my night
shifters you know it might beearly evening before you head
into work allows you to actuallytrigger the system and let it
work.
So your yes and next thoseactually work in tandem together
(16:45):
.
Your yes list is due within 24hours.
You cross off the things thatyou need to get done and if you
can get to something on yournext list, if you have the
mental capacity, the energy, thefinances, the time, whatever it
may be, if you can get tosomething on it, great.
If not, your next listautomatically shifts forward.
(17:08):
So the things that are on yournext list that are more time
sensitive.
They're closer to the 48 hourmark.
They become your new yes list.
You add that to your yes listfor the next following day and
the longer term.
Next items that are closer to 72stay on your next list, and
(17:29):
this keeps you from worryingabout something falling to the
cracks.
This keeps you from constantlydoing that mental replay where
you shuffle through all of yourto-do lists like some absolutely
messed up 687 card pickup cardgame.
It keeps you from having to dothat because you're going to
(17:53):
keep things on your list andshuffle them forward as
necessary, cross them off, andthe good thing about it is that
as you review these things, youstart to discover you know what.
This one isn't critical becauseI actually could delegate it to
somebody else or man.
This one is sitting out at the72 hour section in my next list
(18:15):
and I don't actually care if Iget to it.
Is this a good buy one?
And you really start to be ableto honestly prioritize what to
devote your attention to andwhat not to, what actually
deserves your precious energyand what doesn't.
So the list isn't about doingmore.
It's about doing what mattersand letting go of the rest.
(18:39):
So I've made this tooldownloadable for you.
It is beautiful and completelyfree.
You can download the freeversion of the list right now.
The link is in the show notes.
So if you're on Apple Podcasts,if you're on Spotify, in the
show notes you'll see thatthere's actual clickable links,
one of which is at the top andallows you to text me feedback,
(19:02):
hint hint, and the other one isgoing to be a link to the actual
download of the free version ofthe list.
So it's clean, beautiful,designed for maximum impact.
You can print it, you can useit in good notes or notability,
you can slap it on your fridgelike a sacred sticky note from
the universe, if that's what youwant.
But if you want to level it up,oh bestie.
(19:23):
I designed multiple gorgeousversions.
I'm talking florals, lunarvibes, soft gradients like
chef's kiss, adorable, maybeeven some mermaids in there.
And because you're herelistening to the podcast, you
can access one of them for free.
So you're going to go to thecode team hub, which is tcthorg,
click on the shop, browse tothe templates, pick one you love
(19:45):
and use the code birthdayritual at checkout and it's
going to unlock one of thosepremium versions on me.
So let that be your birthdaygift from me to you.
Go, get cute and organized.
So let's close this out withour favorite healing trio.
So our coffee crystal anddivination section Feels weird
(20:06):
not to have done it for twoweeks, but this week, with my
coffee, we're off Whole30.
We survived Whole30.
And I'm still doing thedairy-free version, still
hanging out with the nut pods,although I am using the cookie
butter one that has some steviain it, and I've got to say
whether it's iced, whether it'shot.
(20:26):
For me, right now, nut pods arewhere it's at.
My really good friend Brennanis laughing hysterically right
now because I used to abhor them.
Whole30 does weird things toyour taste buds.
When you eliminate crap andtoxins and start putting some
clean food in your mouth, it'skind of incredible.
(20:47):
One of the ways that you canduplicate this, though, whether
it's with half and half or oatmilk, is looking for something
that is hazelnut flavored andadding a little bit of caramel
to it.
Just enjoy the sweet treat.
As far as your coffee of theweek this week, it's a weird
week, with the eclipse going on,we've got planets in retrograde
(21:09):
and again gesturing wildly ateverything around.
So just, you deserve peace.
Sip on something soothing,lovely, awesome cup of coffee
decaf regular who are we kidding?
Ultra-caffeined and just enjoy.
You deserve peace.
(21:31):
So ritualize that.
Enjoy it every morning as youuse your brand new tool and get
used to working with the systemagain.
The tool is not going to requirea lot of overwhelming effort.
The whole reason behind itsdesign was I couldn't utilize
something that was just going toadd to the overwhelm.
(21:52):
It had to be something thatdidn't require extra dopamine.
So this week, with your coffeeof the week, with your sweet
treat that you're sipping ongetting ready for your day or
your evening shift, whatever itmight be, utilize your list,
your yes, next pass and goodbye.
Let's look at our crystalprescription and we're going to
(22:17):
pull this out.
So this week's crystal isfluorite.
This is kind of an organizer ofthe mineral world.
It helps clear mental fog,organize thoughts and stabilize
emotional energy.
This is a leadership stone.
So fluorite and having it inyour vicinity really kind of
helps you assimilate and kind oftake on that leadership energy,
(22:40):
which is literally exactly whatyou need to do when it comes to
using this tool, taking controlof your overwhelm and giving
yourself some mental peace.
Okay, so keep it on your deskin your pocket bracelet.
You know the drill.
So divination, reading our tarotcard for this week, I pulled
the Knight of Pentacles.
(23:00):
For this week, I pulled theKnight of Pentacles.
So the Knight of Pentacles, yes, we're on a journey, but this
is slow and steady.
This is focused effort.
This card says you don't haveto do everything at once.
You just have to take the nextstep and even resting counts.
Remember what I said earlierwe're not doing this by
(23:22):
perfection.
This is just beautiful progress.
So we're not focused onperfection.
We're not focused on decisionfatigue and getting locked up
and overwhelmed.
We are focused on continual,steady progress forward Every
single time you check off one ofthose boxes on your list.
(23:43):
That's beautiful progress.
All right, friends.
That is it for this week'sRitual Nurse birthday special.
I hope this episode gave you amoment to pause to breathe.
Remember that you don't have tocarry the weight of the world.
So grab your list from the shownotes, use the code to get a
second gorgeous little templateas a gift and make your list of
(24:06):
ritual that you actually lookforward to.
Snap a pic and tag me at theritual nurse so we can all
inspire each other to stopdrowning and start organizing.
Next week, we're going to kickoff a new mini series on time
boundaries, because saying no isa sacred act, and I'm going to
teach you how to do it withpower.
Take care of yourself first,always Ritualize your rest,
(24:30):
protect your peace and rememberyou are the healer, not the
martyr, and, as always, loveyour faces.
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