Why Toxic Love Feels So Intense — And Why It’s So Hard to Leave

Interviewed by John Cooper for his Podcast. 

This interview focuses on Ross Rosenberg’s theories about toxic relationship patterns, particularly the Human Magnet Syndrome and Self‑Love Deficit Disorder (SLDD), formerly known as codependency. Rosenberg explains how people with unmet attachment needs and low self‑love are unconsciously drawn to pathological narcissists through intense chemistry, familiarity, and trauma bonding rooted in childhood attachment trauma. The discussion explores how narcissists and self‑love‑deficient individuals often come from the same dysfunctional family systems but adapt differently, and why these relationships feel euphoric at first.

The conversation also examines how concepts such as trauma bonding, limerence, and relationship addiction are frequently misunderstood, why narcissism is difficult to treat in therapy, and challenges myths like “idealize–devalue–discard.” It differentiates types of narcissism and emphasizes that healing begins with accurately understanding these dynamics and rebuilding self‑love in order to break repetitive, painful relationship cycles.

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ABOUT ROSS ROSENBERG
Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC, is a psychotherapist, educator, expert witness, and celebrated author. He is also a global thought leader and clinical expert in codependency, trauma, pathological narcissism, narcissistic abuse, and addictions.

Ross's pioneering contributions to codependency have provided sweeping theoretical and practical updates and developed a treatment program that permanently resolves the issue. Ross has been featured on national TV and radio and is a regular radio and podcast guest.

In addition, he has traveled the world, giving his one-of-a-kind keynote presentations and educational workshops. His global impact is best illustrated by his YouTube channel, with 30 million views and 297,000 subscribers, and the sale of 190,000 Human Magnet Syndrome books published in 12 languages. In 2013, Ross created The Self-Love Recovery Institute, a hub for his personal development, workshops, professional training, retreats, other programs, and services.

Learn more at www.SelfLoveRecovery.com.

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