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Ever wondered what words light up your partner's desire? In this episode, Leah & Dr. Willow get real about verbal turn-ons that transform intimate moments. They are diving into what women want to hear both inside & outside the bedroom. They're sharing personal preferences while acknowledging everyone's different. Dr Willow says, "What opens you versus what closes you—that's the most important thing", because what turns on one woman might completely shut down another. They emphasize the importance of curiosity, experimentation, and open communication in discovering what words create the most powerful, arousing, & erotic experiences.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:
- Sexual Accelerators vs. Brakes: Discover what ignites desire versus what puts the brakes on arousal
- Taking Back Our Words: How reclaiming terms like "pussy" can be empowering
- The Power of Possession: Why phrases like "your body is mine" can create intense arousal (even for the most empowered women!)
- Beyond Words: How physical expressions of desire (like proper hair pulling and neck holding) complement verbal communication
- Body Affirmation Magic: The transformative power of "word baths" that celebrate every inch of your body
EPISODE LINKS
- Erotic Blueprint Quiz
- Instagram | Sterling Cooper
- SxR Episode #125 | Dr. Anne Tourng
- SxR Episode #20 | Dirty Talk for Beginners
- Book | The Voice, The Vulva, and The Vagus Nerve by Debs de Vries
- Book | The Male Brain by Louann Brizendine
- Book | The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine
The Power of Pleasure, A Free Summit July 23-24, 2025. This 2-day live event will feature trailblazers in the field of conscious sexuality. Join us for FREE!
AWAKENING THE GODDESS IN CRETE! Leah & Willow want to take you on an all-woman's tantric pilgrimage to Greece Oct 5-12, 2025! Join us for a trip of lifetime.
LAST 10x LONGER. If you suffer from premature ejaculation, you are not alone, master 5 techniques to cure this stressful & embarrassing issue once and for all. Save 20% Coupon: PODCAST20.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Announcer (00:00):
Welcome to the Sex Reimagined Podcast, where sex is
shame free and pleasure forward.
Let's get into the show.
Leah (00:09):
Okay, hey, hey.
Welcome to the Sex ReimaginedPodcast.
Hey, this is your girl, Leah,and your girl, Dr.
Willow.
Willow (00:25):
Hi everyone, I'm so excited to be here, uh, we're
feeling a little frisky alreadybecause we have a really fun
topic for you today, all aboutwhat women want to hear during
sex.
What do women really want tohear when they are, um, in the
throes of ecstasy?
Leah (00:43):
Yeah.
I mean, we can really take thisboth.
What do women want to hear bothinside the bedroom and outside
the bedroom?
Because there's some real, uh,
Willow (00:51):
of different things.
Leah (00:53):
but sometimes they're the same, you know?
Willow (00:55):
the same, yeah.
Leah (00:56):
Yeah, and also just to acknowledge, we are two women,
we are not every woman, so youmay disagree with us.
And we want to hear about it,like we, we really want you to
share with us.
If we are not representing thethings that you like to hear,
please enlighten us.
Let's broaden this conversation.
Let's have this conversationtogether.
(01:18):
Today it's just Willow and Ichit chatting, but you joining
us is a thrill.
And it helps us broaden ourawareness.
Willow (01:27):
Yeah.
Exactly.
Leah (01:29):
on the keyboard and type in the comments, people.
Um, and we'll do a follow up tothis show.
So what do we want to hear?
I'll tell you some of thefavorite things I like to hear.
Willow (01:39):
Let's start there.
Leah (01:41):
Okay.
I, and I, and I realize notevery woman is going to be
attracted to this.
Um, and that is, Ooh, you aresuch a good girl.
Good girl.
Willow (01:48):
Mm.
Leah (01:49):
girl.
I know.
I'm not surprised.
I'm not surprised that doesn'twork for you.
Willow (01:56):
I know.
Leah (01:57):
But I want to be told I'm a good girl.
And I realize that like a lot offeminists out there would be
like, I'm not a girl.
I'm a woman.
And like, I can be all of it.
So, um, there is something thatis erotically opens at getting
sort of that, that approval thatthe younger psyche in me will
crave.
Willow (02:14):
Hmm.
Mm hmm.
I could see that.
What is that movie, uh, the newmovie?
Oh, Baby Girl.
Baby girl.
Yeah.
And in that movie, I haven'tseen it yet, but doesn't, isn't
it sort of geared
Leah (02:28):
uses the phrase, um, you're my baby girl, or
something like that.
And I like that too.
I've got a girlfriend whostarted calling all of us baby
girl.
I'm like, she doesn't probablyrealize that there's a lot of,
like, erotic charge there, but Ilike hearing it from her too.
Willow (02:42):
yeah, yeah.
Well, I
Leah (02:44):
answers the phone, hey baby girl.
Willow (02:45):
Yeah, I know.
I have girlfriends who do thattoo.
I like that.
That's sweet.
But I do.
Here's what's interesting forme.
Even, my whole life growing upwhen people were like, hey girl,
you know, anybody, men, women,doesn't matter.
I just find it.
I've always found itcondescending.
I don't know why.
Maybe something in myupbringing.
(03:07):
I'm not sure.
But, um, I don't know.
Yeah.
I'm not a fan.
I've told guys that I've datedbefore.
I'm like, don't call me girl.
Leah (03:16):
Yeah.
Willow (03:17):
So this is one of the most important things I wanted
to share on this episode is likeknowing what works for you, what
opens you versus what closesyou.
That's the most important thing.
And then being able tocommunicate it in a loving way,
because what works for one womanreally may not work for another.
And so,
Leah (03:34):
And I have to say, like, this comes back to like, green
light, red light, or, um,putting on the brakes.
Like, what makes you put thebrakes on your sexual arousal
versus what makes you want topress the accelerator?
When someone says, you know,you're my sweet baby girl, or,
um, such a good girl, or such agood naughty girl.
(03:55):
Ooh, such a slutty girl.
All those things, like, as longas there's girl in there, I'm
probably gonna like it.
It's probably gonna make mepress the accelerator.
What is not helpful is when allsomeone says is what they don't
want.
But they don't follow up withwhat would press the accelerator
for them, and that is theuninvestigated inquiry that we
(04:15):
all need to get better atbecause it's so much more
helpful to know what opens youversus only what closes you.
And I think we're in a habit, Ithink women in general are in a
habit of really just talkingabout their breaks.
And not talking about theiraccelerators.
And that's because they've neverbeen given permission to
discover their accelerators.
(04:36):
It's not because women are justassholes and they want you to
guess and read their mind.
Willow (04:41):
I think it's also because women are embarrassed
about their accelerators.
Like, yes, they haven't had thechance to explore, and if they
have, they're like, oh, that'skinky, or that's weird, or
that's bad, or that's shamefulin some way, that's too sexual,
that means I'm not a good mom,or that means I'm not a good
wife, or that means it
Leah (05:00):
Or I'm not a good feminist.
Willow (05:02):
Yes,
Leah (05:03):
know, like, if I get turned on and my pussy gets wet
because someone says girl to me,that feels very shameful because
as someone who's supposed to beliberated, you know, it's like
suddenly that goes against whatmaybe other women would approve
of.
Willow (05:21):
Yeah, you know, I don't with my thing with girl just
personally I don't really Idon't have like a feminist thing
around it like that doesn't that
Leah (05:30):
that resonate.
Willow (05:31):
For me.
No.
I don't I don't know what it isBut it's just a thing another
thing that I really have notappreciated is when people tell
me to smile, like smile, youknow I think this is the reason
is because when I was a kid I'vealways been sort of a kind of
like more subdued, like kind ofa watcher.
(05:52):
Like sitting back in thebackground, kind of more shy as
a kid.
And I think my shyness was madeto be wrong.
Like, why are you so shy?
What's wrong with you?
You know?
And, and then this, this wholething of like, smile.
I'm like, you fucking smile.
Leah (06:05):
Yeah.
Willow (06:06):
Don't tell me to smile, you know, smile if I want to.
So there's, I think there'salso, there's a, feline quality
to the feminine and, um, youknow, if you think about like a
cat, like a cat is like, I'll dowhat I want to do when I want to
do it.
And not because somebody islike, make, it's not like a dog,
like, come on over here, youknow, less on demand.
So I don't know.
(06:27):
Those are my thoughts
Leah (06:28):
on that.
Another word I really like isgoddess.
You know, like when, when I, nowI, I know I used to really like
being called goddess outside thebedroom too.
I don't anymore.
Willow (06:39):
Oh,
Leah (06:40):
I find that actually annoying.
I, I think it's because like inmy early Tantra years, Goddess
was so, it was all about theGoddess, all about the Goddess,
all about the Goddess, all aboutthe Goddess.
And I felt like I had to keep onrepresenting the Goddess because
I was in the front of the roomand then I, you know, when I
started to do some deeperpersonal growth work, I got some
feedback that people felt like Iwas always holding up the
(07:02):
archetype of the goddess theycouldn't get to know me.
And so it created a disruptionof trust.
Well, who is she really?
And here I thought I was likefuck I'm finally doing it right.
I have to be the goddess all thetime I have to represent this
body of work and in the seminarroom and outside the seminar
room and then the horror ofpeople feeling they couldn't
(07:23):
trust me and the idea of someonenot being able to trust me was
so destabilizing because Iprided myself on being
trustworthy.
Like that's who I saw myself inthe world.
And so when that got in the waysuddenly that disrupted the
archetype of the goddess for me.
Now I still love playing withthe archetype of the goddess but
I now know to take thatarchetype off.
(07:44):
And I started to suddenly not,actually, have as much reverence
for the goddess archetype afterthat whole experience.
After I processed that wholeexperience, I kind of felt like,
oh god, this gagged me with aspoon in the fucking goddess
already.
Um, and I was watching, I waswatching myself and other women
as they were becoming initiatedinto this whole goddess thing
(08:07):
take the word goddess's name invain.
Being like I have a right totreat other people like shit
because I'm in the name of thegoddess and I'm going to slay
that motherfucking ego rightnow.
And then that started to disturbme and then I had to put other
students in check when I sawthem emasculating men or doing a
lot of cancel culture energy inthe name of the goddess and I
was like oh fuck the goddess atthis point.
(08:28):
Um, But I have to say where itstill lights me up and, and
turns up the fire is if I amnaked and someone is worshiping
my body as the body of thegoddess.
When someone's just like, oh mygod, you're the fucking goddess
right now.
You know, when they're so filledwith desire and passion and
they're so filled in theirreverence for this female
(08:49):
sexuality that is expressingitself through me and it feels
sacred and divine, like, oh mygod, all day long please.
Um.
But I still want to be called adirty little slut.
I want to be the goddess and Iwant to be a dirty little slut.
Willow (09:02):
You can be the profane and the, the sacred.
You can have it all.
You can have it all.
And I think, you know, this isone thing that comes up for me
around like languaging for alldifferent kinds of women is
really understanding, like, foryou, you have such an
interesting relationship withthe goddess based on being a
(09:23):
Tantra teacher for 20 plusyears, you know, so that's going
to be a really different kind ofexperience than so many others.
And, um, so I think taking intoaccount a woman's relationship
with her own femininity with thegoddess, um, and also what kind
of, what's her erotic, uh,blueprint.
You know, if somebody's more ofa kinkster or a sexual on the
(09:47):
blueprint, they're gonna wannabe called a, a dirty little slut
and a whore, and you know, getoff on that and God bless.
And others are gonna be morewanting to be called the
goddess, you know?
So that's a really, um, a reallyimportant I think, thing to, to
uncover when understandingsomeone's language.
(10:08):
And then, you know, there arepeople who run all the full
spectrum like myself.
I mean that again, there arewords that don't work for me and
some and some that really do.
But, um, I can, I can kind of gofrom the really highly sexual
place to, um, I think I may be alittle bit more timid in the
kink realm.
Like I've done some play with,you know, daddy, little girl,
(10:32):
that kind of language.
And I haven't like dove in fullyinto that.
I'm like, okay, you know,there's some eros there for
sure.
But it's, I'm a little bit lessinclined in that direction at
this point in my journey with,um, languaging specifically.
But, um, but yeah, I rememberwhen I, when I kind of got into
(10:53):
like more dirty talk, you know,like fucking and all of that
kind of stuff, like cock andpussy and all that.
Yeah.
And, um, and it was, it was likemy, my sexuality on the
blueprint, like lit up, youknow, of course I've always had
the energetic and the sensual,
Leah (11:10):
Well, why don't you say something more about the erotic
blueprints?
Because there's some people whomight be hearing our show for
the first time who've never evenheard about what you're talking
about.
Willow (11:17):
yeah.
So the erotic blueprint wascreated by Jaiya and, um, it is
basically five sort of types ofsexuality that you have a
propensity toward or that youlean toward.
And usually you have one that'smore primary, maybe a secondary,
um, but you can develop all ofthem over time.
(11:39):
And so, um, the, they start,they're kind of, kind of, Go in
some kind of order, notnecessarily.
But the energetic is, you know,somebody who you could just like
blow on their skin or just lookat them in the right way, or
just like put a feather to theirneck and they'd get really
aroused and really turned on.
(11:59):
Um, that's always been me.
Like I've been able to like,just open my, my legs to the
moon and like, you know, stufflike that.
Start to bring moon energy inand oh my God, I'm turned on.
So arrows can come from alldifferent sort of energetic
places when you run thatenergetic blueprint.
And then, um, there's thesensual and these, the
sensualists really love, um,smell and taste and touch.
(12:23):
They want all of their sensesdelighted and they just love to
revel and.
In the, yeah, in the good,yummy, deliciousness of it all.
And, um, then there's thesexual, which is kind of what we
would think of more.
That's what we've all beentaught around sexuality or seen
in pornography, taught, youknow, and, um, The, and so
Leah (12:47):
all about
Willow (12:47):
cock, pussy, penetration, fucking yeah.
And, uh, dirty talk, all thatkind of stuff like throwing,
manhandling, throwing youaround, all of that.
And then, um, sexuality.
So there's, so again, energetic,um, sensual, sexual, and then we
move on to kink, which is, has afew different realms within it.
(13:11):
So there's.
Kink like physical kink, like Iwant to be tied up and spanked
and ball gagged and blindfolded.
And then there's more, um, likepsychological kink, like I've
got this thing inside of me,this shadow inside of me that
I'm aware of, and I want tobring it to the surface.
So let's do a scene around that,where that, that old trigger and
(13:33):
that wound kind of gets pushedpsychologically and you get to
kind of act that out throughsexuality, which I think is
Profoundly, profoundly healing,actually.
And then, and then there's theshape shifter, the one who can
really play in all the realms.
And, um, it's fun to play in allthe realms.
It's fun to have a little bit ofthis and a little bit of that.
(13:54):
And it really just, it requiresexploring and finding what works
for you, you know?
Leah (14:00):
Yeah, so think of like the erotic blueprint as being the
love languages of the bedroom,the love languages of sexuality.
And when you dive deeper intothem, you have an experience of
both like the shadow side andthe light side, things that can
make those particular archetypesproblematic.
And ways with which they blossomand are a beautiful aspect of
(14:22):
sexual expression.
Um, and the whole point of theerotic blueprints, uh, is
basically to discover maybe whatyou lean towards, your, your,
what preferences you have, butthen to go beyond that and
really discover The otherblueprints, and during my
journey of it, two things havehappened.
One is I've become lessjudgmental of the blueprints
(14:43):
that I previously judged over mypreferences, and two,
discovered, like, their magicand their artistry, and then you
truly become more of theshapeshifter, which loves all of
it, um.
So anyways, you should checkthat out.
We'll put the link in the shownotes if you want to take the
quiz.
I think it's 20 bucks orsomething.
You get a printout of yourpercentages.
(15:04):
Uh, and if you emailsupport@sexreimagined.Com I will
send you a cheat sheet of theerotic blueprints.
We have a PDF and a littlehandout and, uh, it's very, it's
much more thorough than some ofthe other resources you could
find out there.
So, uh, send a request.
Give me that blueprint.
Cheat sheet, Leah! Leah! Supportat www.
(15:25):
sexforimagination.
Willow (15:26):
hmm.
Yeah.
So back to language in thebedroom.
So coming from that more, um,you know, having the natural
propensity toward the energeticand the sensual, I've always
been a fan of words like thegoddess and yoni, you know,
these more, um, Tantric words,lingam.
Um, I, but then, you know, asthis.
(15:47):
sexual blueprint came onlinemore.
I was like, Oh, I love pussy.
I love cock.
I love fucking like, I love allthat language as well.
Um, recently we were, Leah sentme a little clip with this guy.
Do you remember his name?
Leah (16:00):
I'll, uh, while you're explaining your reaction to it,
I'll look it up.
Willow (16:04):
Okay, so, um, this guy on YouTube and he's like talking
about how every time, everysingle time he has ever had sex
with a woman or made love to awoman, he says, whenever he
says, your pussy is mine, shegets lit up, her eyes roll back
in her head, she loves it.
(16:24):
He's like, I've never said thatwhen I'm fucking a woman and not
had her completely love it.
So anyway, so I was trying that,I was trying it on for size the
other night.
Leah (16:35):
hold on.
His name, his name on Instagramis Sterling Guides.
He has got a number of differentInstagram accounts.
He's, I think, a former pornstar.
He's fucking amazing.
He gives great advice.
I love
Willow (16:49):
got to have him on the
Leah (16:50):
I would love to have him
Willow (16:51):
Let's try to get him
Leah (16:52):
is such a baller.
Willow (16:54):
Okay,
Leah (16:54):
So anyway, say, say the other night you were trying it
on and what
Willow (16:57):
happened?
Oh yeah, I was trying it on.
I was doing a sex magic practicejust with myself.
Four hours I clocked by myselfmaking love to the divine within
me.
It was pretty rad.
And um, And I was like, Oh,let's think about that.
You know, cause of course,remember everyone, the most
important sexual organ in yourbody is right between your ears.
So your brain, your mind.
(17:17):
So turning that on and, and Iwas like, Oh yeah, I've
definitely had men say that tome.
And yes, it, it is hot and it isa turn on.
And so as I was in the throes ofmy own eroticism, thinking about
it turned me on more.
It was great.
Leah (17:31):
So what did you say in your head to yourself?
Willow (17:33):
I just imagined my, you know, future life partner.
Leah (17:37):
I was wondering if you were claiming your pussy for
yourself, like you're mine.
Willow (17:42):
Ah, I'ma try that tonight.
Leah (17:44):
Okay.
Okay.
I really love that.
I mean, even if you switched itup to say your yoni is mine.
Willow (17:50):
Yeah, your yoni is
Leah (17:51):
for those of you who don't like the word pussy, I totally
understand.
For years, I hated the word
Willow (17:57):
Oh, you did?
Leah (17:58):
I did.
And I still stand behind this isthat I felt like boys and men
would use this as a derogatoryterm towards each other.
You're for, you're a fuckingpussy, you know, as if, as if
implying that that man or boy isa weak, and I'm like, there is
nothing stronger than a pussy.
So you do not get to use thatterm to humiliate someone.
(18:21):
That is some bullshit, becauseit totally misrepresents the
magnificence of the pussy, youmotherfucker.
It just riles me right up.
I get, I get pissed justthinking about it.
Um, so, but I, and I love thatwomen have had a reclamation
with the word pussy, and arestarting to own it, and, and so
for me, it's like I can saypussy now, because I'm taking it
(18:42):
back from idiots who think it'sokay to use it as a curse word.
To me, it should be a word ofreverence.
Willow (18:48):
you know, interestingly enough, another word that's been
used really derogatorily forwomen's genitalia is the word
cunt
Leah (18:55):
Love the word cunt.
I think we should take that oneback too.
Willow (18:58):
we really need to retake that one back because what it's
an old English word and itactually means birth canal.
That's what cunt means.
And people have cunt.
Maybe,
Leah (19:09):
wait, can we fact check somebody?
Willow (19:12):
it doesn't matter.
It means birth canal
Leah (19:14):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Willow (19:15):
and, um, and so to bastardize that word, you know,
and to make it into somethingbad is, um,
Leah (19:24):
Silly.
Willow (19:24):
so ridiculous.
Because we all come from thebirth canal.
It's the portal of life.
Hello, people.
Leah (19:29):
I have, I really do love that word.
We have a mutual friend whoreally hates that word.
Willow (19:36):
Oh, do we
Leah (19:37):
I called her a little cunt the other day.
Willow (19:40):
And she did not
Leah (19:41):
No, she, no, she laughed.
She laughed.
She enjoyed, she, but she madeit clear like I really don't
like the word.
I'm like, I'm sorry.
You lose your word.
And so then I just kept oncalling her cunt for the rest of
the phone call.
Willow (19:49):
Oh, hilarious.
That's so
Leah (19:51):
Yeah.
So she takes a lot of shit from
Willow (19:53):
but here's the thing.
I've never really had cunt used,like, in the throes of an erotic
moment, have you?
Leah (20:01):
I've read it and masturbated to it, but I don't
know that anyone's ever had theguts to like bring it to the
table.
Here's what I want this episode.
I want people to have more gutsaround what they say in the
bedroom, and you get dirty andnaughty and tell me how much you
love my cunt.
Tell me how much you're gonnaown my.
Fuckin pussy.
I want you to be possessive.
(20:22):
Now, I don't want you to bepossessive outside the bedroom.
That's a very
Willow (20:27):
clarify.
Leah (20:28):
but I want you to be really possessive in the
bedroom.
Willow (20:31):
Yeah, well, and I
Leah (20:32):
feel claimed.
I want to be Chosen.
That is a hard wire in thepsyche of most people, but women
especially due to so much of ourconditioning going back
thousands of years.
There is a, they, we want to bechosen.
We want to be claimed.
We want you to sweep us up andown us in very specific sectors
(20:54):
of our life.
We, I don't want that all overthe place.
There's some people who do, butthat's, they're very few and far
between.
Willow (21:01):
Mm hmm.
Leah (21:03):
So we need to, like, know where are we allowed to play
with those edges of possession,and that's why I think this
Instagrammer is really speakingto the psyche and the hearts of
a lot of women in the bedroomwho want you to own them, take
them, ravish them, and thosesentences is really important.
(21:24):
That it started, it's hittingthat mark.
Willow (21:27):
yeah, I mean, especially when you're in a more
vulnerable, open, naked, youknow, connected to the divine
kind of state where you'rereally like you're, you're,
you're high on your arousalscale and you're just really
feeling like so connected to,to, Feel chosen in that moment
(21:48):
with words, with actions.
Um, and you know, this issomething I've been working with
men on quite a bit lately is,um, their impulse.
They're afraid of their impulseto, to take.
And, You know, and so it's like,and so then they hesitate.
Is this okay?
Is that okay?
And how annoying is it if a guyis like, uh, can I kiss you?
(22:11):
Is it okay if I touch you?
And I'm like, you got to stopdoing that.
Leah (22:14):
Yeah, stop asking permission
Willow (22:15):
for every thing.
Bring your confidence forwardand just, you know, Follow your
impulse and of course, you knowwhen I'm working with them with
them professionally There'salways a bound a professional
boundary, which is different.
But still there's a way that Ithink all of us could could be
more in our solar plexus more inour confidence more in our in
(22:39):
fact I'm doing this wholemovement thing right now, which
is really all about ownership ofthis upper part of your body,
like chest and throat and, andsolar plexus.
And like, you are not onlyworthy of this life, but like
you have the, um, the ability totake what you want from life.
(23:01):
There's so much abundance inthis world and we can really
reach out and take it forourselves.
And it's hot.
It's a turn on when somebody, awoman or a man, comes at you
with confidence and they startflirting with you.
I mean, they're, they're takingwhat they want from you.
They're taking your energy.
They're taking your attention.
(23:21):
They're, they've got youengaged.
They're enjoying your laughterand the light in your eyes.
So they are, you know, playingwith that, um, that energy of
taking and receiving.
That's something too, that Ithink we should really, um,
break down and do a course onLeah is flirting, you know,
cause that's been coming up topeople like, I don't get it.
I don't know how, dah, dah, dah,dah.
(23:42):
And it's a dance of energy.
And I think the same thing istrue when you're having, when
you're in this, In the throes ofsex, like it's a dance of energy
and a reading somebody like,where are they at on the arousal
scale?
What kind of language do theywant at that point versus at the
very beginning of their arousaljourney?
Leah (24:00):
Yeah, you know It's it's great when it is in sync and it
is on and you are speaking toeach other's bodies and your
bodies are like in the circuitand dancing.
It's tricky when you don't haveskill in this area, when your
desire is like uncontained, andthen that feels icky to someone.
When you're taking energy, it'slike there's a place where it's
(24:23):
hot and it works.
And then there's a place
Willow (24:25):
Where it's too
Leah (24:26):
not work.
And that really kind of comesback to containment.
It's like you being in yourdesire, allowing your desire and
your lust and your sexual energyto be so like alive in you, but
it's also contained.
It's not like leaking all overthe place in unconsciousness
where you're not observing is myenergy opening someone or are
(24:47):
they shifting and pulling awayand pivoting and, you know,
flinching from
Willow (24:53):
is where attunement really comes in very strong.
Like being able to attune tosomeone else's energy and read
them.
And I think maybe that's, youknow, what, where the, the sort
of lack of confidence is in menis like, there's never been any
one on one on how to attune to awoman, like how to read what's
going on for her.
Is she opening?
Is she closing?
(25:14):
And, you know, I've been with,um, men who are amazing at
attuning to women and, and havetold me like.
that I'm hard to read.
And I don't think I'm hard toread at all.
So, you know,
Leah (25:25):
Well, if you've heard it more than once, you might want
to think about maybe you are.
Willow (25:29):
Only once.
Only heard it once.
Leah (25:31):
all right, I haven't heard it, okay, I was gonna say, that
just sounds like denial, butonly once and you can only take
it so far.
That's only one person'sexperience.
Willow (25:41):
yeah.
And, and, and he, you know, he'svery adept at attuning to women.
However, especially in thebedroom.
Um, however, yeah, I
Leah (25:50):
But a lot of women are hard to read,
Willow (25:52):
a lot of women are hard to read.
Leah (25:53):
taking the spotlight off of you and saying, you know,
there are a lot of women whoaren't expressive.
Who don't make sounds, whoaren't, like, connected to their
bodies so that they're actuallyshowing body language cues, you
know, they're, and, and I thinkthat's actually something most
women aren't good at, and whenwe're used to being pleasing,
sometimes that stops us frombeing ourselves, and allowing
(26:15):
ourselves to be from our head,trying to predict what somebody
wants from us.
And instead dropping into ourbody where that natural
expression is easy to read.
And when you're connected toyour breath and you allow
yourself to be in your body andto move your system, that's what
makes a great lover.
And many of us have never beentaught to be a good lover.
We've just been taught to try tobe pleasing.
(26:35):
And then we're just in ourheads.
Willow (26:36):
Yeah.
We're trying to move the rightway, and sound the right way,
and say the right
Leah (26:40):
or we're just like a biology frog and we're not doing
a damn thing.
We're somewhere else.
We're not even in the room, youknow.
It's tricky, but it's not.
But here's the thing.
It feels tricky at first whenyou don't feel competent at
something.
And so here's another thing thatI have a lot of compassion for
is a lot of guys whose sexualenergy is so overwhelming to
their system.
(27:01):
Like once they start feelingthose sexy feelings, it's all
over the place because that'sall the, it's all the capacity
that they've trained theirattention for.
Willow (27:09):
Mm hmm.
Leah (27:10):
is just being in the overwhelm of their sensations
that are experiencing, whichmakes them oblivious to what
else is happening in the room.
And I think that's where a lotof women feel like how much men
are unconscious with theirsexual energy, because they're
more consumed with what they'refeeling inside themselves than
also being with the person thatthey're with.
And so this is why, like,Learning to be a good lover is
(27:32):
worth your time.
It's worth your investment.
It's worth you exploring andreading and listening and trying
to improve your skills.
We're not born great lovers.
Willow (27:41):
And it bleeds out into other areas of your life,
because attunement isn't justabout being able to read someone
else.
It's about how, reading yourselftoo, so, you know, knowing,
like, knowing in the momentlike, wow, this is opening me to
give this flirt to this personand I can see that it's opening
them.
Okay, that's attunement, yeah,let me give more.
(28:03):
Okay, now I went a little bittoo far with my sexuality inside
of my flirt and I can see thatit closes her, okay, I'm
attuning, okay, let merecalibrate and adjust.
So that I can give the rightamount of flirt to this person
that opens them.
And it's the same thing insideof sexuality.
And so again, like, you know, itall comes back to us and what
(28:25):
you're saying, like it's soworthy to, to study and to
understand and to practice.
Even practice with professionalsso that you can get the little
nuggets that you need to moveyou along in your journey around
what good sex is for you.
Leah (28:44):
Yeah.
I think too, like what can, whatdo men want to hear in the
bedroom?
I think a lot of men are hungryto also be told how beautiful
their body is.
How, how irresistible their cockis.
How you can't wait to feel them.
How you can't wait to feel themin your mouth.
How you can't wait to feel themwherever you want them to
penetrate you.
How it feels to be touched bythem.
(29:07):
How like, how gorgeous you thinkthey are, how safe you feel in
their arms, your favorite spotto like snuggle up into.
I mean, who doesn't love thenook, the nook of a man's arms?
It's like right there betweenlike that chest and the armpit
where you just feel like you fitlike a puzzle piece.
You know, being able to bedemonstrative with your words of
(29:30):
like, how strong they feel, howprotected that you feel.
Um, How big they feel, you know,how, even if they're not a huge
guy, and you have to be carefulwhen you talk about cock size,
because men also don't want tobe lied to, but they also want
to feel themselves.
And it's always amazing to mehow much men think about cock
(29:54):
size, where my experience isthat women think very little
about cock size Now, there arewomen who prefer bigger cocks.
That's because they love thefeeling of fullness.
Then there's some of us who donot prefer bigger cocks.
I like to feel the space arounda penis.
I don't like to feel numbed outby a penis.
So I don't like giant, giantcocks personally.
So we all have, like, theperfect size that makes our body
(30:17):
sing, so there's no wrong size.
And what I also foundinteresting when we were
interviewing Dr.
Ann, what she said is that theaverage male penis, and this is
across race, doesn't matter whatrace you are, is five inches and
a quarter.
That's the, that is most men.
That's how big their lingam ortheir penis is.
And yet we have this obsessionwith an eight inch cock and then
(30:40):
people who go really out thereand say 12 inch cock.
Like, I don't even, don't evenpresent that to me,
Willow (30:45):
don't even think that exists.
Leah (30:46):
Yeah,
Willow (30:47):
Oh my
Leah (30:48):
I know.
Does that exist?
Maybe in some porn.
Maybe there are some people whohave
Willow (30:51):
There might be, but it'd be way too big.
I mean, you can't even get itall the way in.
It's going to be hitting yourcervix.
You know, one of the words thatI do not love, and we were just
interviewing, um, the cock ringdoctor, Dr.
Elliot,
Leah (31:05):
Yeah.
Dr.
Elliot Justin.
Willow (31:07):
and um, He kept saying dick the whole time.
He said dick, dick, dick, dick.
And then you and I startedsaying it too.
I'm like, wait, that's not ourlanguage.
We don't usually use that word.
You don't mind dick?
Leah (31:19):
dick.
I don't.
Uh uh.
Willow (31:21):
don't know why.
I'm
Leah (31:22):
No, I don't like anything that makes something
Willow (31:24):
sexy to me.
Leah (31:25):
bright.
I don't think of it as sexy atall.
No.
But it's, I don't, but I findit, it's, it's fine.
I mean, Matt and I will sayreally funny words.
words you know,
Willow (31:34):
It's like, yeah, funny, jokey.
Leah (31:36):
yeah, yeah, yeah.
Willow (31:37):
Okay.
What else do we love to hearwhen we're being taken, when
we're being ravished by a
Leah (31:42):
You, you'll never get tired of being told you smell so
Oh, I know.
Willow (31:46):
And your skin is so soft.
Leah (31:49):
Especially genitals and someone says you smell so good
or you taste so good.
Like that makes you feel so muchmore relaxed.
Most of us have like, worriedthat we don't have like the
right smell for someone.
So when you can be reassuringthat you really like that, like
right now you guys, if you'rejust listening, I'm scanning up
(32:10):
and down my body with my hands.
Cause I want to know, Hey, doesthis work for you?
You know, is this package goodfor you?
Is this working for you?
Is this copacetic?
Are we working?
Like, we want to know.
That how we taste, how we smell,and how we look is pleasing to
our sexual partner.
So when you like, I love it whena man like forces my hands up
above my head and then smells myarmpits.
(32:31):
It's like you fucking smelldelicious.
I want to fucking eat you.
And then they slide down yourbody.
And I love to feel them smellme, like smell around the curve
of my breast, smell the side ofmy waist, smell in between my
legs, smell in between my ass.
Like, Like, take it all.
Take, take this fruit basket andtell me how luscious and yummy
(32:54):
and like how it works for you.
Now, I'm trying to think, if itdidn't work for them and they
said it, would I know?
I think I want to hear it eitherway.
Willow (33:04):
Probably.
You probably would know, but youmight not care in the moment if
you're really turned on.
But yeah, I think like when,when a man can really give
those, those verbal cues,there's so many men who just
don't make any noise and theydon't speak, they don't use any
language.
It's like, come on, free up thethroat chakra, everybody, no
Leah (33:24):
Yeah, do your work with the Throat Chakra.
Open that shit up.
Yes.
Take a voice lesson and getcomfortable.
I know it's so hard.
It's probably the hardest ask.
It's been the hardest ask in myworkshops.
Like, it's the thing that peoplehave the hardest thing to do is
to express themselves verbally.
We're so afraid of beingembarrassed.
So we just have that on, we havethat trapped and it's the
(33:47):
biggest gift you can give toyour lover.
Willow (33:49):
yeah, it totally drops someone into, um, a sense of
security, like safety.
Like, wow, in this moment, youare enjoying all of me, all
these aspects of me that I Ihave been uncertain about or
insecure about or so it breedsthis again when you're in that
naked vulnerable sexual placelike that's the best time to
(34:12):
rewire neural pathways in yourbody.
You're going to be walkingaround so different the next day
after being with a lover thenight before who's like you, I
could hang out between yourthighs for hours.
I love the way you taste, I lovethe way you smell, I love the
everything about it and so it's
Leah (34:30):
And if you're with someone who you don't feel that way
about, you're probably with thewrong person.
Willow (34:34):
Right.
Leah (34:35):
So like it is pretty important for sexual chemistry
and you want to kind of linethis up with someone who's also
a good partner.
Sometimes the person you havethe best sexual chemistry with
is not a great partner and youaren't compatible anywhere else.
So that's, that could be tricky.
You want to have some sort ofbalance, but you really do want
to be with someone who you, youlike all those things.
(34:56):
You actually like how theysmell, and you like how they
taste, and you, if it's a littleoff, you can work on that.
It's not an impossible thing toovercome, so don't throw in the
towel quite yet.
Um, but this is where ravishmentcomes in.
I realize, like, there issomething that is so hot and so
sexually satisfying, I think, asa woman.
(35:18):
Which is having that sexualravishment, which is when
someone is smelling you andthey're gobbling you up, you
know, they're inhaling you andthey're spreading open your legs
and they're taking your legs andthey're putting it over their
their shoulders and they'returning you all about.
There's something about beingmanhandled and smelled and then
tasted and like they're justgobbling you up.
(35:39):
You're just like this littlesweet piece of chocolate.
You're just a delicious truffleand they can't get enough like
that's ravishment.
Willow (35:44):
and ladies,
Leah (35:45):
women are missing and they want that from their
Willow (35:48):
don't be afraid, ladies, to ask for that.
Like, I want you to ravish me.
I want you to, you know, turn mybody over, put my legs up over
your shoulders.
Like, ask for those things.
You don't know what you don'tknow until you try.
And so, just really giving themexact cues of what to do for
(36:11):
your body and exact things youwant to hear them say.
And it can, you can say it inthe moment.
This is the kind of, you know,sexuality advancement that you
can do in the moment, as far ascommunication goes.
Like, It can be super hot.
Like, if you're with somebodywho's really not verbal, they
haven't made a peep, theyhaven't said anything to you
(36:33):
about your body, you could sayin that moment, like, God, I
would really love to hear yousay, you know, how much, how
much you love the way I taste,or, or how, how much you love
the way my skin feels on yourbody, or whatever it is.
Leah (36:48):
Or like, I think too, you can, let's say you've just
tasted someone.
Let's say you've just caughtdown on someone.
Come up and then kiss them withthat.
It's another way ofcommunication.
So if something's a little off,they can taste it.
If something's really right,Ooh, they can taste it.
They can get off on that.
It's another way of kind ofcommunicating, um, information
that might be really useful foryour partner.
(37:08):
I know that I'm, can be prettyshy.
Like, I'll give someone littleprompts.
Like, I'll tell someone to tellme I'm a good girl, but that's
probably about as brave as Iget.
Like, I, unless I'm having aconversation outside of the
bedroom, it's actually reallyhard for me in the heat of the
moment to go Describe to me blahblah blah.
Willow (37:25):
Oh, I love it.
Yeah, it's it's good dirty talkfor me.
It's like, you know, tell me,tell me you want to fuck me.
Tell me you want to take me.
Tell me you want to tell me youlove my pussy, whatever it is.
You know, like it's it's.
And then they, you know, andthen they do, and then they keep
saying it, and then it keepsgoing, and it goes higher and
higher and higher.
The
Leah (37:47):
bad, and then don't.
Like there's something thatincreases the anticipation to
like great degrees when youdescribe how bad you want to
take it, how much you want it,and then you don't.
You delay it and you delay it sothat that point of penetration
ends up being so So off thechart, because you've been, your
Willow (38:06):
anticipation.
Oh, it's the best.
You know, there's that, thatlike, that, um, fecundity of
anticipation, like the rightnessand the fullness of that moment
of anticipation.
That joy.
Build so much incrediblearousal, like takes your, you
know, your, your level 8 to an8.
(38:29):
9 is, um, is so much.
It's so, I forgot what I wasgoing to say, but something
around, like, it's synonymousto, you know, sexuality, like
bringing, I don't know, I lostmy train of thought
Leah (38:44):
You lost the plot there.
Willow (38:45):
cut, cut that part
Leah (38:47):
I will.
Um, there's something too, likearound, there's some physicality
with words that really go welltogether.
Like coming back to that wholepiece about like, your body's
mine, or your yoni's mine, oryour cunt is mine.
Whatever language you want touse.
When someone comes behind yourhead, now I have short hair,
Willow has long hair, the key tohair pulling, there is something
(39:08):
about when someone is takingpossession of you and then they
do a physical gesture thatcomplements that possession.
One is hair pulling.
Now, not everyone likes hairpulling, probably because
someone pulled their hair wrong.
Um, and a good hair pull startswhere you come through the back
of the scalp, bringing yourhands up from the neck up to the
(39:30):
head.
And you pull
Willow (39:32):
Fingertips pointing up,
Leah (39:35):
pointing up, and you, and you hold on to the root of her
head and then you can pull herhead back, whisper something in
her ear, kiss her mouth, kissher neck, tell her who owns her,
um, that feels amazing.
You never want to pull on theends of somebody's hair.
You always want to get to theroots.
That's what's sexy.
That doesn't hurt.
(39:55):
You're not like trying to pullsomeone's hair out.
That's not why women like hairpulling.
Um, they like it because itfeels possessive.
It feels, it brings a primalelement to the moment.
It's like you taking possession.
Another thing is when you comearound to hold someone's neck,
you're not trying to choke them.
Unless you really like beingchoked, and then there's skill
and practice and safety.
(40:15):
We're not talking about that.
This is like you come around andyou don't put pressure on
somebody's windpipe.
You put pressure on the sides oftheir neck by their arteries.
You don't squeeze to cut offtheir air supply.
You hold their neck in apossessive hold.
I've got you.
And that hold is communicating.
You're safe.
(40:35):
You're so safe with me that Ican bring this threatening
gesture, but instead of itfeeling threatened, it feels
protective.
It feels like someone's got you.
And then you whisper in theirear, you're mine.
Or even if you're not likeclaiming them in a relationship,
you can say for the next hour,you're mine.
For the next whatever,
Willow (40:55):
know, since we're on the throat, I'm going to go on a
little tangent, a little throattangent here.
Um, so this, um, you know, yourthroat, when you fold the body
in half at the belly button, thethroat is a mirror image of
your, of your genitals.
And there's a really incrediblebook that I'm reading right now,
um, The Voice, The Vulva, andThe Vagus Nerve.
(41:18):
And she talks about how this.
Soul is connected to the VagusNerve.
So there's this really deep likesoul alignment.
So when we, and the Vagus Nerveruns right through these, this
throat area.
So when it is supported in aloving way, in a, in a I've got
you, like you can rest, you cansurrender, you can let go.
(41:42):
The Vagus Nerve, which is Allabout receiving and rest and
digest and allowing yourself toopen to new experiences in life.
That vagus nerve gets a chanceto relax and surrender and open
and this rush of soul connectioncomes through your body.
It's so freaking powerful.
(42:03):
So we are going to beinterviewing her later this
month.
I got introduced to her by amutual friend and um, she's a
really cool woman so I can'twait to have her on the show.
Leah (42:14):
Yeah, right on.
What are some of like, okay, sowe've talked about possession,
like using language that sayslike, I've got you, you're mine,
I own you, I possess you, evenif it's just a dalliance for an
hour, or whether it's someonewho's actually claiming you in
partnership and in life, a longterm relationship.
Those things work great foropening up the body.
(42:35):
And we've talked a little bitabout beautiful things.
Now, we want to point you to anepisode we did.
Um, it was all about dirty talkversus pillow talk.
It's a great episode.
We'll put that link in the shownotes.
Be sure to listen to it.
But if we could talk a littlebit more about pillow talk,
we've referenced the goddess.
What are some other languageswe've talked about when someone
tells you like, how beautiful,we haven't really actually said
(42:56):
much about being told thatyou're beautiful.
How
Willow (43:00):
you know that,
Leah (43:00):
talking about how you look?
Respond to your
Willow (43:03):
there's a whole, there's a whole great practice that, um,
that you can do with yourpartner where you just basically
are just going from the top oftheir head all the way down
through the bottom of their feetand appreciating every little
thing about them.
I appreciate your eyes.
There's, you know, the way thatthey, the shape of them, the
(43:24):
sparkle of them, the color ofthem, whatever.
I appreciate the way your lipsare, like, Just loving and
appreciating and it's, you know,it's a really beautiful, kind of
like yoni witnessing, but on thewhole body.
Leah (43:36):
Yeah, Mama Gina calls that a word bath.
When you give someone a wordbath, and you just, you just,
Oh, I love the shape of youreyebrows.
I love the shape of your ears.
I love your collarbone.
I love the swell at the top ofyour breasts.
I love this curve, this arch,this dimple, this mole, this
(43:57):
birthmark, this thing on your
Willow (43:59):
toe.
The scar,
Leah (44:00):
scar, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Willow (44:02):
Yeah.
And so those, that can be awhole practice and it's good,
it's good to use that practiceto start to get good at
expressing and opening yourthroat chakra and your voice and
your words.
And you can do it with a friend.
It doesn't have to be sexual.
So there's like so many ways toutilize this practice.
(44:22):
And then, you know,
Leah (44:24):
cathartically healing, like especially when you don't
like your body and you have hada struggle liking yourself and
not seeing how beautiful youare, when someone gives you that
gift and you're, you have toreally practice on not
deflecting the gift that they'regiving, but allow yourself to
Yes, to experience their truthand to feel it and to take it in
(44:47):
and the tears that flow fromthere are so cleansing and so
healing.
Fuck, I want everyone to dothat.
That's like mandatory homework.
Willow (44:55):
Do that homework and then write in, and then write in
the comments and let us know howit went.
Leah (45:01):
You don't, you don't need a partner to do that either.
You can stand in front of themirror and give yourself a word
bath.
Willow (45:07):
Yeah, mirror practice.
And so when you have more, likewhen you do that as a, as a
bigger solid practice, then it'seasy.
Like, let's say you've justfinished making love and you're
just laying there and you'rejust caressing the curve of your
partner's neck or something.
They're on their side.
You're caressing the curve oftheir hip or their shoulder or
(45:28):
whatever.
And you, and your words justflow like, Oh my God, I love the
way this looks.
This curve feels against myfingers.
Oh my god, this curve of yourside boob is just so smokin hot.
You
Leah (45:40):
Fills my hands just beautifully.
Yeah.
Willow (45:44):
yeah, so you want to, um, bigger practices.
This is the same as likemeditation.
If you go to a meditationretreat, you're gonna have, have
such a different kind of ongoingdaily meditation practice, you
know, so these bigger practicesthat you implement, we often
will teach couples to, um, do atleast two tantric practices per
(46:07):
month.
And that's going to inform therest of their sexuality the rest
of the month.
It's going to be totallydifferent.
Leah (46:13):
also just a great way of finding out what.
causes you to press the brakes,what causes you to press the
accelerator.
And I just, I want to also givesome, like, there's a range.
When I first started this work,there was shit I could not
believe.
And then later came to believe.
There was stuff I could nothear.
That later I was able to hear soit's a journey
Willow (46:34):
believe about yourself?
Like if somebody was like,you're so
Leah (46:39):
if someone said I love your creamy thighs I would have
gotten a stomachache.
it was too painful to believeand then now someone said I love
it Love your creamy thighs, Iwould grab the fat of them and
like make them lick them, youknow, and scratch them up and do
something more to it.
Like it's, it's, there's anevolution.
What causes the breaks for youtoday may turn into an
accelerator later if you stayopen.
(47:01):
If you stay willing to beinfluenced by what opens someone
else due to your presence,eventually it may open you too.
So it's like, it's just a reallyopen minded through the process.
And that's really goodinformation.
You, you may hear somebody saysomething like if somebody.
When someone called, uh, Willowa dirty little girl, she may,
(47:22):
that may cause her to press thebrakes.
And that's good information forher partner, like she said in
the beginning of the episode.
When you kind of experience aword bath, you'll get
information about what was hardto hear, what was easy to hear,
and that's amazing informationfor someone to know so they can
keep opening you.
Um, so if you don't know whatyou like.
(47:44):
You gotta try some of thesethings on in the heat of the
moment to find out if it worksfor you.
So really, we always will saythis, it all comes back to
having a curious mind and awillingness to be on an
adventure.
Willow (47:58):
Yep, the journey never ends, my friends.
It just keeps going and growingand evolving and there's so
much, there's so muchPhenomenalness to explore, and
there's contraction points alongthe way too that hurt.
So you, you get more resilient,you get better, uh, um, at
(48:20):
navigating all of it, thecontra, contractions and the
Leah (48:23):
know, what's interesting is this phenomenon over the
last, I don't know, 10 years ormore of dick pics and I never
understood the dick pic.
I was like this, this is not aturn on to me.
This just seems like this reallystrange thing, but like what's
really happening with the dickpic?
And what was interesting I wasfollowing the same guy who
mentioned to tell woman that Herpussy is yours.
(48:47):
It will make her wet.
Um, he, I watched a video of hisand it was, instead of sending
her a dick pic, what you senther, wear the gray sweatpants.
Have a fullness in your cock.
Take a picture of your cockbulging in front of, you know,
within the sweatpants.
That is a much more, that willturn her on more than actually
(49:09):
seeing your dick because theirimagination gets activated.
so if you can plug into awoman's imagination, then you
can plug into her Eros.
And I thought, oh, that's very
Willow (49:21):
I wonder
Leah (49:21):
I wondered, is that would that be true for me?
What about you?
Willow (49:25):
Well I think so, it's definitely less of like a turn
off, like dick pics for me are aturn off, but, and so as we're
having this moment ofconversation I'm wondering, I'm
wondering if like, men think Itis a, like, I always feel like
they're doing it for the shockfactor, but I wonder if they're
doing it because they're like,so proud of their cock and
(49:47):
they're like, this is definitelygoing to have to turn her on
because I'm so turned on andwhat would turn them on probably
is a straight up picture of the,of a pussy.
They don't need, yeah.
Or it's just, they don't needclothes over to get turned
Leah (50:02):
think, I
Willow (50:03):
with a Yoni it's hard on,
Leah (50:04):
think it's kind of the way some men touch a clitoris too
hard.
They're doing what feels good totheir genitals.
So they're trying to turn her onby what turns them on, which
doesn't always translate betweenthe two brains.
Between the estrogen brain andthe testosterone brain, though
we,
Willow (50:23):
If you have not read The Male Brain and The Female Brain,
please do not pass go.
Go get those books.
Read those books.
You have to read those books.
Those two books will tell youeverything you'd ever want to
know about the male brain andthe female brain.
I mean, it's phenomenal howdifferent
Leah (50:40):
they
Willow (50:40):
different they
Leah (50:41):
what it comes down to and kind of closing for this episode
is we got to talk more.
we have to normalize these typesof conversations between our
friend groups so that we canprocess this.
I know that it'd be a lot easierfor me to process these turn ons
and what I want to hear byhearing what my, turns my
friends on.
Hear what's worked for them.
So I can kind of go, would thatwork for me?
(51:02):
How do I feel about that?
And then, Oh, this happened.
And having a safe place toprocess what opens you and what
closes you, what turns you on,what turns you off, I think we
need to do that in our socialgroups.
And then we need to have theseconversations with potential
partners, with our currentpartners, so that we can open up
to more arousal and more turn onand find out like what lits that
(51:23):
fire.
Practice saying some of thesescary things out loud because
it's really vulnerable to sayout loud the things you want to
hear because you don't know ifthat's gonna turn off your
partner.
Sometimes it's gonna be a missand hopefully we'll just have a
sense of humor about it insteadof making a fight about it
Willow (51:41):
That's right.
Yeah.
So stay curious, explore yourattunement to yourself and to
others and really, you know,
Leah (51:49):
Yeah, take
Willow (51:50):
Like it's okay if somebody doesn't, yeah, it's
okay if somebody doesn't want tosay dirty little slut to you.
Leah (51:56):
well or
Willow (51:57):
a big deal.
Move on.
What else do you want to hear?
Leah (51:59):
a little right
Willow (52:00):
it a thing.
Leah (52:01):
doesn't have to be a deal breaker Fine fine to go around.
Yeah Yeah.
All right, well this was fun.
yeah, Uh, by the way, that, uh,the Instagram account that we
mentioned, his link will be inthe show notes.
I don't know his name.
Okay.
Love, love, love.
Announcer (52:20):
Thanks for tuning in.
This episode was hosted byTantric Sex Master Coach and
Positive Psychology Facilitator,Leah Piper, as well as by
Chinese and Functional MedicineDoctor and Taoist Sexology
Teacher, Dr.
Willow Brown.
Don't forget, your comments,likes, subscribes and
suggestions matter.
Let's realize this new worldtogether.
Welcome to the Sex Reimagined Podcast, where sex is
shame free and pleasure forward.
Let's get into the show.
Leah (00:09):
Okay, hey, hey.
Welcome to the Sex ReimaginedPodcast.
Hey, this is your girl, Leah,and your girl, Dr.
Willow.
Willow (00:25):
Hi everyone, I'm so excited to be here, uh, we're
feeling a little frisky alreadybecause we have a really fun
topic for you today, all aboutwhat women want to hear during
sex.
What do women really want tohear when they are, um, in the
throes of ecstasy?
Leah (00:43):
Yeah.
I mean, we can really take thisboth.
What do women want to hear bothinside the bedroom and outside
the bedroom?
Because there's some real, uh,
Willow (00:51):
of different things.
Leah (00:53):
but sometimes they're the same, you know?
Willow (00:55):
the same, yeah.
Leah (00:56):
Yeah, and also just to acknowledge, we are two women,
we are not every woman, so youmay disagree with us.
And we want to hear about it,like we, we really want you to
share with us.
If we are not representing thethings that you like to hear,
please enlighten us.
Let's broaden this conversation.
Let's have this conversationtogether.
(01:18):
Today it's just Willow and Ichit chatting, but you joining
us is a thrill.
And it helps us broaden ourawareness.
Willow (01:27):
Yeah.
Exactly.
Leah (01:29):
on the keyboard and type in the comments, people.
Um, and we'll do a follow up tothis show.
So what do we want to hear?
I'll tell you some of thefavorite things I like to hear.
Willow (01:39):
Let's start there.
Leah (01:41):
Okay.
I, and I, and I realize notevery woman is going to be
attracted to this.
Um, and that is, Ooh, you aresuch a good girl.
Good girl.
Willow (01:48):
Mm.
Leah (01:49):
girl.
I know.
I'm not surprised.
I'm not surprised that doesn'twork for you.
Willow (01:56):
I know.
Leah (01:57):
But I want to be told I'm a good girl.
And I realize that like a lot offeminists out there would be
like, I'm not a girl.
I'm a woman.
And like, I can be all of it.
So, um, there is something thatis erotically opens at getting
sort of that, that approval thatthe younger psyche in me will
crave.
Willow (02:14):
Hmm.
Mm hmm.
I could see that.
What is that movie, uh, the newmovie?
Oh, Baby Girl.
Baby girl.
Yeah.
And in that movie, I haven'tseen it yet, but doesn't, isn't
it sort of geared
Leah (02:28):
uses the phrase, um, you're my baby girl, or
something like that.
And I like that too.
I've got a girlfriend whostarted calling all of us baby
girl.
I'm like, she doesn't probablyrealize that there's a lot of,
like, erotic charge there, but Ilike hearing it from her too.
Willow (02:42):
yeah, yeah.
Well, I
Leah (02:44):
answers the phone, hey baby girl.
Willow (02:45):
Yeah, I know.
I have girlfriends who do thattoo.
I like that.
That's sweet.
But I do.
Here's what's interesting forme.
Even, my whole life growing upwhen people were like, hey girl,
you know, anybody, men, women,doesn't matter.
I just find it.
I've always found itcondescending.
I don't know why.
Maybe something in myupbringing.
(03:07):
I'm not sure.
But, um, I don't know.
Yeah.
I'm not a fan.
I've told guys that I've datedbefore.
I'm like, don't call me girl.
Leah (03:16):
Yeah.
Willow (03:17):
So this is one of the most important things I wanted
to share on this episode is likeknowing what works for you, what
opens you versus what closesyou.
That's the most important thing.
And then being able tocommunicate it in a loving way,
because what works for one womanreally may not work for another.
And so,
Leah (03:34):
And I have to say, like, this comes back to like, green
light, red light, or, um,putting on the brakes.
Like, what makes you put thebrakes on your sexual arousal
versus what makes you want topress the accelerator?
When someone says, you know,you're my sweet baby girl, or,
um, such a good girl, or such agood naughty girl.
(03:55):
Ooh, such a slutty girl.
All those things, like, as longas there's girl in there, I'm
probably gonna like it.
It's probably gonna make mepress the accelerator.
What is not helpful is when allsomeone says is what they don't
want.
But they don't follow up withwhat would press the accelerator
for them, and that is theuninvestigated inquiry that we
(04:15):
all need to get better atbecause it's so much more
helpful to know what opens youversus only what closes you.
And I think we're in a habit, Ithink women in general are in a
habit of really just talkingabout their breaks.
And not talking about theiraccelerators.
And that's because they've neverbeen given permission to
discover their accelerators.
(04:36):
It's not because women are justassholes and they want you to
guess and read their mind.
Willow (04:41):
I think it's also because women are embarrassed
about their accelerators.
Like, yes, they haven't had thechance to explore, and if they
have, they're like, oh, that'skinky, or that's weird, or
that's bad, or that's shamefulin some way, that's too sexual,
that means I'm not a good mom,or that means I'm not a good
wife, or that means it
Leah (05:00):
Or I'm not a good feminist.
Willow (05:02):
Yes,
Leah (05:03):
know, like, if I get turned on and my pussy gets wet
because someone says girl to me,that feels very shameful because
as someone who's supposed to beliberated, you know, it's like
suddenly that goes against whatmaybe other women would approve
of.
Willow (05:21):
Yeah, you know, I don't with my thing with girl just
personally I don't really Idon't have like a feminist thing
around it like that doesn't that
Leah (05:30):
that resonate.
Willow (05:31):
For me.
No.
I don't I don't know what it isBut it's just a thing another
thing that I really have notappreciated is when people tell
me to smile, like smile, youknow I think this is the reason
is because when I was a kid I'vealways been sort of a kind of
like more subdued, like kind ofa watcher.
(05:52):
Like sitting back in thebackground, kind of more shy as
a kid.
And I think my shyness was madeto be wrong.
Like, why are you so shy?
What's wrong with you?
You know?
And, and then this, this wholething of like, smile.
I'm like, you fucking smile.
Leah (06:05):
Yeah.
Willow (06:06):
Don't tell me to smile, you know, smile if I want to.
So there's, I think there'salso, there's a, feline quality
to the feminine and, um, youknow, if you think about like a
cat, like a cat is like, I'll dowhat I want to do when I want to
do it.
And not because somebody islike, make, it's not like a dog,
like, come on over here, youknow, less on demand.
So I don't know.
(06:27):
Those are my thoughts
Leah (06:28):
on that.
Another word I really like isgoddess.
You know, like when, when I, nowI, I know I used to really like
being called goddess outside thebedroom too.
I don't anymore.
Willow (06:39):
Oh,
Leah (06:40):
I find that actually annoying.
I, I think it's because like inmy early Tantra years, Goddess
was so, it was all about theGoddess, all about the Goddess,
all about the Goddess, all aboutthe Goddess.
And I felt like I had to keep onrepresenting the Goddess because
I was in the front of the roomand then I, you know, when I
started to do some deeperpersonal growth work, I got some
feedback that people felt like Iwas always holding up the
(07:02):
archetype of the goddess theycouldn't get to know me.
And so it created a disruptionof trust.
Well, who is she really?
And here I thought I was likefuck I'm finally doing it right.
I have to be the goddess all thetime I have to represent this
body of work and in the seminarroom and outside the seminar
room and then the horror ofpeople feeling they couldn't
(07:23):
trust me and the idea of someonenot being able to trust me was
so destabilizing because Iprided myself on being
trustworthy.
Like that's who I saw myself inthe world.
And so when that got in the waysuddenly that disrupted the
archetype of the goddess for me.
Now I still love playing withthe archetype of the goddess but
I now know to take thatarchetype off.
(07:44):
And I started to suddenly not,actually, have as much reverence
for the goddess archetype afterthat whole experience.
After I processed that wholeexperience, I kind of felt like,
oh god, this gagged me with aspoon in the fucking goddess
already.
Um, and I was watching, I waswatching myself and other women
as they were becoming initiatedinto this whole goddess thing
(08:07):
take the word goddess's name invain.
Being like I have a right totreat other people like shit
because I'm in the name of thegoddess and I'm going to slay
that motherfucking ego rightnow.
And then that started to disturbme and then I had to put other
students in check when I sawthem emasculating men or doing a
lot of cancel culture energy inthe name of the goddess and I
was like oh fuck the goddess atthis point.
(08:28):
Um, But I have to say where itstill lights me up and, and
turns up the fire is if I amnaked and someone is worshiping
my body as the body of thegoddess.
When someone's just like, oh mygod, you're the fucking goddess
right now.
You know, when they're so filledwith desire and passion and
they're so filled in theirreverence for this female
(08:49):
sexuality that is expressingitself through me and it feels
sacred and divine, like, oh mygod, all day long please.
Um.
But I still want to be called adirty little slut.
I want to be the goddess and Iwant to be a dirty little slut.
Willow (09:02):
You can be the profane and the, the sacred.
You can have it all.
You can have it all.
And I think, you know, this isone thing that comes up for me
around like languaging for alldifferent kinds of women is
really understanding, like, foryou, you have such an
interesting relationship withthe goddess based on being a
(09:23):
Tantra teacher for 20 plusyears, you know, so that's going
to be a really different kind ofexperience than so many others.
And, um, so I think taking intoaccount a woman's relationship
with her own femininity with thegoddess, um, and also what kind
of, what's her erotic, uh,blueprint.
You know, if somebody's more ofa kinkster or a sexual on the
(09:47):
blueprint, they're gonna wannabe called a, a dirty little slut
and a whore, and you know, getoff on that and God bless.
And others are gonna be morewanting to be called the
goddess, you know?
So that's a really, um, a reallyimportant I think, thing to, to
uncover when understandingsomeone's language.
(10:08):
And then, you know, there arepeople who run all the full
spectrum like myself.
I mean that again, there arewords that don't work for me and
some and some that really do.
But, um, I can, I can kind of gofrom the really highly sexual
place to, um, I think I may be alittle bit more timid in the
kink realm.
Like I've done some play with,you know, daddy, little girl,
(10:32):
that kind of language.
And I haven't like dove in fullyinto that.
I'm like, okay, you know,there's some eros there for
sure.
But it's, I'm a little bit lessinclined in that direction at
this point in my journey with,um, languaging specifically.
But, um, but yeah, I rememberwhen I, when I kind of got into
(10:53):
like more dirty talk, you know,like fucking and all of that
kind of stuff, like cock andpussy and all that.
Yeah.
And, um, and it was, it was likemy, my sexuality on the
blueprint, like lit up, youknow, of course I've always had
the energetic and the sensual,
Leah (11:10):
Well, why don't you say something more about the erotic
blueprints?
Because there's some people whomight be hearing our show for
the first time who've never evenheard about what you're talking
about.
Willow (11:17):
yeah.
So the erotic blueprint wascreated by Jaiya and, um, it is
basically five sort of types ofsexuality that you have a
propensity toward or that youlean toward.
And usually you have one that'smore primary, maybe a secondary,
um, but you can develop all ofthem over time.
(11:39):
And so, um, the, they start,they're kind of, kind of, Go in
some kind of order, notnecessarily.
But the energetic is, you know,somebody who you could just like
blow on their skin or just lookat them in the right way, or
just like put a feather to theirneck and they'd get really
aroused and really turned on.
(11:59):
Um, that's always been me.
Like I've been able to like,just open my, my legs to the
moon and like, you know, stufflike that.
Start to bring moon energy inand oh my God, I'm turned on.
So arrows can come from alldifferent sort of energetic
places when you run thatenergetic blueprint.
And then, um, there's thesensual and these, the
sensualists really love, um,smell and taste and touch.
(12:23):
They want all of their sensesdelighted and they just love to
revel and.
In the, yeah, in the good,yummy, deliciousness of it all.
And, um, then there's thesexual, which is kind of what we
would think of more.
That's what we've all beentaught around sexuality or seen
in pornography, taught, youknow, and, um, The, and so
Leah (12:47):
all about
Willow (12:47):
cock, pussy, penetration, fucking yeah.
And, uh, dirty talk, all thatkind of stuff like throwing,
manhandling, throwing youaround, all of that.
And then, um, sexuality.
So there's, so again, energetic,um, sensual, sexual, and then we
move on to kink, which is, has afew different realms within it.
(13:11):
So there's.
Kink like physical kink, like Iwant to be tied up and spanked
and ball gagged and blindfolded.
And then there's more, um, likepsychological kink, like I've
got this thing inside of me,this shadow inside of me that
I'm aware of, and I want tobring it to the surface.
So let's do a scene around that,where that, that old trigger and
(13:33):
that wound kind of gets pushedpsychologically and you get to
kind of act that out throughsexuality, which I think is
Profoundly, profoundly healing,actually.
And then, and then there's theshape shifter, the one who can
really play in all the realms.
And, um, it's fun to play in allthe realms.
It's fun to have a little bit ofthis and a little bit of that.
(13:54):
And it really just, it requiresexploring and finding what works
for you, you know?
Leah (14:00):
Yeah, so think of like the erotic blueprint as being the
love languages of the bedroom,the love languages of sexuality.
And when you dive deeper intothem, you have an experience of
both like the shadow side andthe light side, things that can
make those particular archetypesproblematic.
And ways with which they blossomand are a beautiful aspect of
(14:22):
sexual expression.
Um, and the whole point of theerotic blueprints, uh, is
basically to discover maybe whatyou lean towards, your, your,
what preferences you have, butthen to go beyond that and
really discover The otherblueprints, and during my
journey of it, two things havehappened.
One is I've become lessjudgmental of the blueprints
(14:43):
that I previously judged over mypreferences, and two,
discovered, like, their magicand their artistry, and then you
truly become more of theshapeshifter, which loves all of
it, um.
So anyways, you should checkthat out.
We'll put the link in the shownotes if you want to take the
quiz.
I think it's 20 bucks orsomething.
You get a printout of yourpercentages.
(15:04):
Uh, and if you emailsupport@sexreimagined.Com I will
send you a cheat sheet of theerotic blueprints.
We have a PDF and a littlehandout and, uh, it's very, it's
much more thorough than some ofthe other resources you could
find out there.
So, uh, send a request.
Give me that blueprint.
Cheat sheet, Leah! Leah! Supportat www.
(15:25):
sexforimagination.
Willow (15:26):
hmm.
Yeah.
So back to language in thebedroom.
So coming from that more, um,you know, having the natural
propensity toward the energeticand the sensual, I've always
been a fan of words like thegoddess and yoni, you know,
these more, um, Tantric words,lingam.
Um, I, but then, you know, asthis.
(15:47):
sexual blueprint came onlinemore.
I was like, Oh, I love pussy.
I love cock.
I love fucking like, I love allthat language as well.
Um, recently we were, Leah sentme a little clip with this guy.
Do you remember his name?
Leah (16:00):
I'll, uh, while you're explaining your reaction to it,
I'll look it up.
Willow (16:04):
Okay, so, um, this guy on YouTube and he's like talking
about how every time, everysingle time he has ever had sex
with a woman or made love to awoman, he says, whenever he
says, your pussy is mine, shegets lit up, her eyes roll back
in her head, she loves it.
(16:24):
He's like, I've never said thatwhen I'm fucking a woman and not
had her completely love it.
So anyway, so I was trying that,I was trying it on for size the
other night.
Leah (16:35):
hold on.
His name, his name on Instagramis Sterling Guides.
He has got a number of differentInstagram accounts.
He's, I think, a former pornstar.
He's fucking amazing.
He gives great advice.
I love
Willow (16:49):
got to have him on the
Leah (16:50):
I would love to have him
Willow (16:51):
Let's try to get him
Leah (16:52):
is such a baller.
Willow (16:54):
Okay,
Leah (16:54):
So anyway, say, say the other night you were trying it
on and what
Willow (16:57):
happened?
Oh yeah, I was trying it on.
I was doing a sex magic practicejust with myself.
Four hours I clocked by myselfmaking love to the divine within
me.
It was pretty rad.
And um, And I was like, Oh,let's think about that.
You know, cause of course,remember everyone, the most
important sexual organ in yourbody is right between your ears.
So your brain, your mind.
(17:17):
So turning that on and, and Iwas like, Oh yeah, I've
definitely had men say that tome.
And yes, it, it is hot and it isa turn on.
And so as I was in the throes ofmy own eroticism, thinking about
it turned me on more.
It was great.
Leah (17:31):
So what did you say in your head to yourself?
Willow (17:33):
I just imagined my, you know, future life partner.
Leah (17:37):
I was wondering if you were claiming your pussy for
yourself, like you're mine.
Willow (17:42):
Ah, I'ma try that tonight.
Leah (17:44):
Okay.
Okay.
I really love that.
I mean, even if you switched itup to say your yoni is mine.
Willow (17:50):
Yeah, your yoni is
Leah (17:51):
for those of you who don't like the word pussy, I totally
understand.
For years, I hated the word
Willow (17:57):
Oh, you did?
Leah (17:58):
I did.
And I still stand behind this isthat I felt like boys and men
would use this as a derogatoryterm towards each other.
You're for, you're a fuckingpussy, you know, as if, as if
implying that that man or boy isa weak, and I'm like, there is
nothing stronger than a pussy.
So you do not get to use thatterm to humiliate someone.
(18:21):
That is some bullshit, becauseit totally misrepresents the
magnificence of the pussy, youmotherfucker.
It just riles me right up.
I get, I get pissed justthinking about it.
Um, so, but I, and I love thatwomen have had a reclamation
with the word pussy, and arestarting to own it, and, and so
for me, it's like I can saypussy now, because I'm taking it
(18:42):
back from idiots who think it'sokay to use it as a curse word.
To me, it should be a word ofreverence.
Willow (18:48):
you know, interestingly enough, another word that's been
used really derogatorily forwomen's genitalia is the word
cunt
Leah (18:55):
Love the word cunt.
I think we should take that oneback too.
Willow (18:58):
we really need to retake that one back because what it's
an old English word and itactually means birth canal.
That's what cunt means.
And people have cunt.
Maybe,
Leah (19:09):
wait, can we fact check somebody?
Willow (19:12):
it doesn't matter.
It means birth canal
Leah (19:14):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Willow (19:15):
and, um, and so to bastardize that word, you know,
and to make it into somethingbad is, um,
Leah (19:24):
Silly.
Willow (19:24):
so ridiculous.
Because we all come from thebirth canal.
It's the portal of life.
Hello, people.
Leah (19:29):
I have, I really do love that word.
We have a mutual friend whoreally hates that word.
Willow (19:36):
Oh, do we
Leah (19:37):
I called her a little cunt the other day.
Willow (19:40):
And she did not
Leah (19:41):
No, she, no, she laughed.
She laughed.
She enjoyed, she, but she madeit clear like I really don't
like the word.
I'm like, I'm sorry.
You lose your word.
And so then I just kept oncalling her cunt for the rest of
the phone call.
Willow (19:49):
Oh, hilarious.
That's so
Leah (19:51):
Yeah.
So she takes a lot of shit from
Willow (19:53):
but here's the thing.
I've never really had cunt used,like, in the throes of an erotic
moment, have you?
Leah (20:01):
I've read it and masturbated to it, but I don't
know that anyone's ever had theguts to like bring it to the
table.
Here's what I want this episode.
I want people to have more gutsaround what they say in the
bedroom, and you get dirty andnaughty and tell me how much you
love my cunt.
Tell me how much you're gonnaown my.
Fuckin pussy.
I want you to be possessive.
(20:22):
Now, I don't want you to bepossessive outside the bedroom.
That's a very
Willow (20:27):
clarify.
Leah (20:28):
but I want you to be really possessive in the
bedroom.
Willow (20:31):
Yeah, well, and I
Leah (20:32):
feel claimed.
I want to be Chosen.
That is a hard wire in thepsyche of most people, but women
especially due to so much of ourconditioning going back
thousands of years.
There is a, they, we want to bechosen.
We want to be claimed.
We want you to sweep us up andown us in very specific sectors
(20:54):
of our life.
We, I don't want that all overthe place.
There's some people who do, butthat's, they're very few and far
between.
Willow (21:01):
Mm hmm.
Leah (21:03):
So we need to, like, know where are we allowed to play
with those edges of possession,and that's why I think this
Instagrammer is really speakingto the psyche and the hearts of
a lot of women in the bedroomwho want you to own them, take
them, ravish them, and thosesentences is really important.
(21:24):
That it started, it's hittingthat mark.
Willow (21:27):
yeah, I mean, especially when you're in a more
vulnerable, open, naked, youknow, connected to the divine
kind of state where you'rereally like you're, you're,
you're high on your arousalscale and you're just really
feeling like so connected to,to, Feel chosen in that moment
(21:48):
with words, with actions.
Um, and you know, this issomething I've been working with
men on quite a bit lately is,um, their impulse.
They're afraid of their impulseto, to take.
And, You know, and so it's like,and so then they hesitate.
Is this okay?
Is that okay?
And how annoying is it if a guyis like, uh, can I kiss you?
(22:11):
Is it okay if I touch you?
And I'm like, you got to stopdoing that.
Leah (22:14):
Yeah, stop asking permission
Willow (22:15):
for every thing.
Bring your confidence forwardand just, you know, Follow your
impulse and of course, you knowwhen I'm working with them with
them professionally There'salways a bound a professional
boundary, which is different.
But still there's a way that Ithink all of us could could be
more in our solar plexus more inour confidence more in our in
(22:39):
fact I'm doing this wholemovement thing right now, which
is really all about ownership ofthis upper part of your body,
like chest and throat and, andsolar plexus.
And like, you are not onlyworthy of this life, but like
you have the, um, the ability totake what you want from life.
(23:01):
There's so much abundance inthis world and we can really
reach out and take it forourselves.
And it's hot.
It's a turn on when somebody, awoman or a man, comes at you
with confidence and they startflirting with you.
I mean, they're, they're takingwhat they want from you.
They're taking your energy.
They're taking your attention.
(23:21):
They're, they've got youengaged.
They're enjoying your laughterand the light in your eyes.
So they are, you know, playingwith that, um, that energy of
taking and receiving.
That's something too, that Ithink we should really, um,
break down and do a course onLeah is flirting, you know,
cause that's been coming up topeople like, I don't get it.
I don't know how, dah, dah, dah,dah.
(23:42):
And it's a dance of energy.
And I think the same thing istrue when you're having, when
you're in this, In the throes ofsex, like it's a dance of energy
and a reading somebody like,where are they at on the arousal
scale?
What kind of language do theywant at that point versus at the
very beginning of their arousaljourney?
Leah (24:00):
Yeah, you know It's it's great when it is in sync and it
is on and you are speaking toeach other's bodies and your
bodies are like in the circuitand dancing.
It's tricky when you don't haveskill in this area, when your
desire is like uncontained, andthen that feels icky to someone.
When you're taking energy, it'slike there's a place where it's
(24:23):
hot and it works.
And then there's a place
Willow (24:25):
Where it's too
Leah (24:26):
not work.
And that really kind of comesback to containment.
It's like you being in yourdesire, allowing your desire and
your lust and your sexual energyto be so like alive in you, but
it's also contained.
It's not like leaking all overthe place in unconsciousness
where you're not observing is myenergy opening someone or are
(24:47):
they shifting and pulling awayand pivoting and, you know,
flinching from
Willow (24:53):
is where attunement really comes in very strong.
Like being able to attune tosomeone else's energy and read
them.
And I think maybe that's, youknow, what, where the, the sort
of lack of confidence is in menis like, there's never been any
one on one on how to attune to awoman, like how to read what's
going on for her.
Is she opening?
Is she closing?
(25:14):
And, you know, I've been with,um, men who are amazing at
attuning to women and, and havetold me like.
that I'm hard to read.
And I don't think I'm hard toread at all.
So, you know,
Leah (25:25):
Well, if you've heard it more than once, you might want
to think about maybe you are.
Willow (25:29):
Only once.
Only heard it once.
Leah (25:31):
all right, I haven't heard it, okay, I was gonna say, that
just sounds like denial, butonly once and you can only take
it so far.
That's only one person'sexperience.
Willow (25:41):
yeah.
And, and, and he, you know, he'svery adept at attuning to women.
However, especially in thebedroom.
Um, however, yeah, I
Leah (25:50):
But a lot of women are hard to read,
Willow (25:52):
a lot of women are hard to read.
Leah (25:53):
taking the spotlight off of you and saying, you know,
there are a lot of women whoaren't expressive.
Who don't make sounds, whoaren't, like, connected to their
bodies so that they're actuallyshowing body language cues, you
know, they're, and, and I thinkthat's actually something most
women aren't good at, and whenwe're used to being pleasing,
sometimes that stops us frombeing ourselves, and allowing
(26:15):
ourselves to be from our head,trying to predict what somebody
wants from us.
And instead dropping into ourbody where that natural
expression is easy to read.
And when you're connected toyour breath and you allow
yourself to be in your body andto move your system, that's what
makes a great lover.
And many of us have never beentaught to be a good lover.
We've just been taught to try tobe pleasing.
(26:35):
And then we're just in ourheads.
Willow (26:36):
Yeah.
We're trying to move the rightway, and sound the right way,
and say the right
Leah (26:40):
or we're just like a biology frog and we're not doing
a damn thing.
We're somewhere else.
We're not even in the room, youknow.
It's tricky, but it's not.
But here's the thing.
It feels tricky at first whenyou don't feel competent at
something.
And so here's another thing thatI have a lot of compassion for
is a lot of guys whose sexualenergy is so overwhelming to
their system.
(27:01):
Like once they start feelingthose sexy feelings, it's all
over the place because that'sall the, it's all the capacity
that they've trained theirattention for.
Willow (27:09):
Mm hmm.
Leah (27:10):
is just being in the overwhelm of their sensations
that are experiencing, whichmakes them oblivious to what
else is happening in the room.
And I think that's where a lotof women feel like how much men
are unconscious with theirsexual energy, because they're
more consumed with what they'refeeling inside themselves than
also being with the person thatthey're with.
And so this is why, like,Learning to be a good lover is
(27:32):
worth your time.
It's worth your investment.
It's worth you exploring andreading and listening and trying
to improve your skills.
We're not born great lovers.
Willow (27:41):
And it bleeds out into other areas of your life,
because attunement isn't justabout being able to read someone
else.
It's about how, reading yourselftoo, so, you know, knowing,
like, knowing in the momentlike, wow, this is opening me to
give this flirt to this personand I can see that it's opening
them.
Okay, that's attunement, yeah,let me give more.
(28:03):
Okay, now I went a little bittoo far with my sexuality inside
of my flirt and I can see thatit closes her, okay, I'm
attuning, okay, let merecalibrate and adjust.
So that I can give the rightamount of flirt to this person
that opens them.
And it's the same thing insideof sexuality.
And so again, like, you know, itall comes back to us and what
(28:25):
you're saying, like it's soworthy to, to study and to
understand and to practice.
Even practice with professionalsso that you can get the little
nuggets that you need to moveyou along in your journey around
what good sex is for you.
Leah (28:44):
Yeah.
I think too, like what can, whatdo men want to hear in the
bedroom?
I think a lot of men are hungryto also be told how beautiful
their body is.
How, how irresistible their cockis.
How you can't wait to feel them.
How you can't wait to feel themin your mouth.
How you can't wait to feel themwherever you want them to
penetrate you.
How it feels to be touched bythem.
(29:07):
How like, how gorgeous you thinkthey are, how safe you feel in
their arms, your favorite spotto like snuggle up into.
I mean, who doesn't love thenook, the nook of a man's arms?
It's like right there betweenlike that chest and the armpit
where you just feel like you fitlike a puzzle piece.
You know, being able to bedemonstrative with your words of
(29:30):
like, how strong they feel, howprotected that you feel.
Um, How big they feel, you know,how, even if they're not a huge
guy, and you have to be carefulwhen you talk about cock size,
because men also don't want tobe lied to, but they also want
to feel themselves.
And it's always amazing to mehow much men think about cock
(29:54):
size, where my experience isthat women think very little
about cock size Now, there arewomen who prefer bigger cocks.
That's because they love thefeeling of fullness.
Then there's some of us who donot prefer bigger cocks.
I like to feel the space arounda penis.
I don't like to feel numbed outby a penis.
So I don't like giant, giantcocks personally.
So we all have, like, theperfect size that makes our body
(30:17):
sing, so there's no wrong size.
And what I also foundinteresting when we were
interviewing Dr.
Ann, what she said is that theaverage male penis, and this is
across race, doesn't matter whatrace you are, is five inches and
a quarter.
That's the, that is most men.
That's how big their lingam ortheir penis is.
And yet we have this obsessionwith an eight inch cock and then
(30:40):
people who go really out thereand say 12 inch cock.
Like, I don't even, don't evenpresent that to me,
Willow (30:45):
don't even think that exists.
Leah (30:46):
Yeah,
Willow (30:47):
Oh my
Leah (30:48):
I know.
Does that exist?
Maybe in some porn.
Maybe there are some people whohave
Willow (30:51):
There might be, but it'd be way too big.
I mean, you can't even get itall the way in.
It's going to be hitting yourcervix.
You know, one of the words thatI do not love, and we were just
interviewing, um, the cock ringdoctor, Dr.
Elliot,
Leah (31:05):
Yeah.
Dr.
Elliot Justin.
Willow (31:07):
and um, He kept saying dick the whole time.
He said dick, dick, dick, dick.
And then you and I startedsaying it too.
I'm like, wait, that's not ourlanguage.
We don't usually use that word.
You don't mind dick?
Leah (31:19):
dick.
I don't.
Uh uh.
Willow (31:21):
don't know why.
I'm
Leah (31:22):
No, I don't like anything that makes something
Willow (31:24):
sexy to me.
Leah (31:25):
bright.
I don't think of it as sexy atall.
No.
But it's, I don't, but I findit, it's, it's fine.
I mean, Matt and I will sayreally funny words.
words you know,
Willow (31:34):
It's like, yeah, funny, jokey.
Leah (31:36):
yeah, yeah, yeah.
Willow (31:37):
Okay.
What else do we love to hearwhen we're being taken, when
we're being ravished by a
Leah (31:42):
You, you'll never get tired of being told you smell so
Oh, I know.
Willow (31:46):
And your skin is so soft.
Leah (31:49):
Especially genitals and someone says you smell so good
or you taste so good.
Like that makes you feel so muchmore relaxed.
Most of us have like, worriedthat we don't have like the
right smell for someone.
So when you can be reassuringthat you really like that, like
right now you guys, if you'rejust listening, I'm scanning up
(32:10):
and down my body with my hands.
Cause I want to know, Hey, doesthis work for you?
You know, is this package goodfor you?
Is this working for you?
Is this copacetic?
Are we working?
Like, we want to know.
That how we taste, how we smell,and how we look is pleasing to
our sexual partner.
So when you like, I love it whena man like forces my hands up
above my head and then smells myarmpits.
(32:31):
It's like you fucking smelldelicious.
I want to fucking eat you.
And then they slide down yourbody.
And I love to feel them smellme, like smell around the curve
of my breast, smell the side ofmy waist, smell in between my
legs, smell in between my ass.
Like, Like, take it all.
Take, take this fruit basket andtell me how luscious and yummy
(32:54):
and like how it works for you.
Now, I'm trying to think, if itdidn't work for them and they
said it, would I know?
I think I want to hear it eitherway.
Willow (33:04):
Probably.
You probably would know, but youmight not care in the moment if
you're really turned on.
But yeah, I think like when,when a man can really give
those, those verbal cues,there's so many men who just
don't make any noise and theydon't speak, they don't use any
language.
It's like, come on, free up thethroat chakra, everybody, no
Leah (33:24):
Yeah, do your work with the Throat Chakra.
Open that shit up.
Yes.
Take a voice lesson and getcomfortable.
I know it's so hard.
It's probably the hardest ask.
It's been the hardest ask in myworkshops.
Like, it's the thing that peoplehave the hardest thing to do is
to express themselves verbally.
We're so afraid of beingembarrassed.
So we just have that on, we havethat trapped and it's the
(33:47):
biggest gift you can give toyour lover.
Willow (33:49):
yeah, it totally drops someone into, um, a sense of
security, like safety.
Like, wow, in this moment, youare enjoying all of me, all
these aspects of me that I Ihave been uncertain about or
insecure about or so it breedsthis again when you're in that
naked vulnerable sexual placelike that's the best time to
(34:12):
rewire neural pathways in yourbody.
You're going to be walkingaround so different the next day
after being with a lover thenight before who's like you, I
could hang out between yourthighs for hours.
I love the way you taste, I lovethe way you smell, I love the
everything about it and so it's
Leah (34:30):
And if you're with someone who you don't feel that way
about, you're probably with thewrong person.
Willow (34:34):
Right.
Leah (34:35):
So like it is pretty important for sexual chemistry
and you want to kind of linethis up with someone who's also
a good partner.
Sometimes the person you havethe best sexual chemistry with
is not a great partner and youaren't compatible anywhere else.
So that's, that could be tricky.
You want to have some sort ofbalance, but you really do want
to be with someone who you, youlike all those things.
(34:56):
You actually like how theysmell, and you like how they
taste, and you, if it's a littleoff, you can work on that.
It's not an impossible thing toovercome, so don't throw in the
towel quite yet.
Um, but this is where ravishmentcomes in.
I realize, like, there issomething that is so hot and so
sexually satisfying, I think, asa woman.
(35:18):
Which is having that sexualravishment, which is when
someone is smelling you andthey're gobbling you up, you
know, they're inhaling you andthey're spreading open your legs
and they're taking your legs andthey're putting it over their
their shoulders and they'returning you all about.
There's something about beingmanhandled and smelled and then
tasted and like they're justgobbling you up.
(35:39):
You're just like this littlesweet piece of chocolate.
You're just a delicious truffleand they can't get enough like
that's ravishment.
Willow (35:44):
and ladies,
Leah (35:45):
women are missing and they want that from their
Willow (35:48):
don't be afraid, ladies, to ask for that.
Like, I want you to ravish me.
I want you to, you know, turn mybody over, put my legs up over
your shoulders.
Like, ask for those things.
You don't know what you don'tknow until you try.
And so, just really giving themexact cues of what to do for
(36:11):
your body and exact things youwant to hear them say.
And it can, you can say it inthe moment.
This is the kind of, you know,sexuality advancement that you
can do in the moment, as far ascommunication goes.
Like, It can be super hot.
Like, if you're with somebodywho's really not verbal, they
haven't made a peep, theyhaven't said anything to you
(36:33):
about your body, you could sayin that moment, like, God, I
would really love to hear yousay, you know, how much, how
much you love the way I taste,or, or how, how much you love
the way my skin feels on yourbody, or whatever it is.
Leah (36:48):
Or like, I think too, you can, let's say you've just
tasted someone.
Let's say you've just caughtdown on someone.
Come up and then kiss them withthat.
It's another way ofcommunication.
So if something's a little off,they can taste it.
If something's really right,Ooh, they can taste it.
They can get off on that.
It's another way of kind ofcommunicating, um, information
that might be really useful foryour partner.
(37:08):
I know that I'm, can be prettyshy.
Like, I'll give someone littleprompts.
Like, I'll tell someone to tellme I'm a good girl, but that's
probably about as brave as Iget.
Like, I, unless I'm having aconversation outside of the
bedroom, it's actually reallyhard for me in the heat of the
moment to go Describe to me blahblah blah.
Willow (37:25):
Oh, I love it.
Yeah, it's it's good dirty talkfor me.
It's like, you know, tell me,tell me you want to fuck me.
Tell me you want to take me.
Tell me you want to tell me youlove my pussy, whatever it is.
You know, like it's it's.
And then they, you know, andthen they do, and then they keep
saying it, and then it keepsgoing, and it goes higher and
higher and higher.
The
Leah (37:47):
bad, and then don't.
Like there's something thatincreases the anticipation to
like great degrees when youdescribe how bad you want to
take it, how much you want it,and then you don't.
You delay it and you delay it sothat that point of penetration
ends up being so So off thechart, because you've been, your
Willow (38:06):
anticipation.
Oh, it's the best.
You know, there's that, thatlike, that, um, fecundity of
anticipation, like the rightnessand the fullness of that moment
of anticipation.
That joy.
Build so much incrediblearousal, like takes your, you
know, your, your level 8 to an8.
(38:29):
9 is, um, is so much.
It's so, I forgot what I wasgoing to say, but something
around, like, it's synonymousto, you know, sexuality, like
bringing, I don't know, I lostmy train of thought
Leah (38:44):
You lost the plot there.
Willow (38:45):
cut, cut that part
Leah (38:47):
I will.
Um, there's something too, likearound, there's some physicality
with words that really go welltogether.
Like coming back to that wholepiece about like, your body's
mine, or your yoni's mine, oryour cunt is mine.
Whatever language you want touse.
When someone comes behind yourhead, now I have short hair,
Willow has long hair, the key tohair pulling, there is something
(39:08):
about when someone is takingpossession of you and then they
do a physical gesture thatcomplements that possession.
One is hair pulling.
Now, not everyone likes hairpulling, probably because
someone pulled their hair wrong.
Um, and a good hair pull startswhere you come through the back
of the scalp, bringing yourhands up from the neck up to the
(39:30):
head.
And you pull
Willow (39:32):
Fingertips pointing up,
Leah (39:35):
pointing up, and you, and you hold on to the root of her
head and then you can pull herhead back, whisper something in
her ear, kiss her mouth, kissher neck, tell her who owns her,
um, that feels amazing.
You never want to pull on theends of somebody's hair.
You always want to get to theroots.
That's what's sexy.
That doesn't hurt.
(39:55):
You're not like trying to pullsomeone's hair out.
That's not why women like hairpulling.
Um, they like it because itfeels possessive.
It feels, it brings a primalelement to the moment.
It's like you taking possession.
Another thing is when you comearound to hold someone's neck,
you're not trying to choke them.
Unless you really like beingchoked, and then there's skill
and practice and safety.
(40:15):
We're not talking about that.
This is like you come around andyou don't put pressure on
somebody's windpipe.
You put pressure on the sides oftheir neck by their arteries.
You don't squeeze to cut offtheir air supply.
You hold their neck in apossessive hold.
I've got you.
And that hold is communicating.
You're safe.
(40:35):
You're so safe with me that Ican bring this threatening
gesture, but instead of itfeeling threatened, it feels
protective.
It feels like someone's got you.
And then you whisper in theirear, you're mine.
Or even if you're not likeclaiming them in a relationship,
you can say for the next hour,you're mine.
For the next whatever,
Willow (40:55):
know, since we're on the throat, I'm going to go on a
little tangent, a little throattangent here.
Um, so this, um, you know, yourthroat, when you fold the body
in half at the belly button, thethroat is a mirror image of
your, of your genitals.
And there's a really incrediblebook that I'm reading right now,
um, The Voice, The Vulva, andThe Vagus Nerve.
(41:18):
And she talks about how this.
Soul is connected to the VagusNerve.
So there's this really deep likesoul alignment.
So when we, and the Vagus Nerveruns right through these, this
throat area.
So when it is supported in aloving way, in a, in a I've got
you, like you can rest, you cansurrender, you can let go.
(41:42):
The Vagus Nerve, which is Allabout receiving and rest and
digest and allowing yourself toopen to new experiences in life.
That vagus nerve gets a chanceto relax and surrender and open
and this rush of soul connectioncomes through your body.
It's so freaking powerful.
(42:03):
So we are going to beinterviewing her later this
month.
I got introduced to her by amutual friend and um, she's a
really cool woman so I can'twait to have her on the show.
Leah (42:14):
Yeah, right on.
What are some of like, okay, sowe've talked about possession,
like using language that sayslike, I've got you, you're mine,
I own you, I possess you, evenif it's just a dalliance for an
hour, or whether it's someonewho's actually claiming you in
partnership and in life, a longterm relationship.
Those things work great foropening up the body.
(42:35):
And we've talked a little bitabout beautiful things.
Now, we want to point you to anepisode we did.
Um, it was all about dirty talkversus pillow talk.
It's a great episode.
We'll put that link in the shownotes.
Be sure to listen to it.
But if we could talk a littlebit more about pillow talk,
we've referenced the goddess.
What are some other languageswe've talked about when someone
tells you like, how beautiful,we haven't really actually said
(42:56):
much about being told thatyou're beautiful.
How
Willow (43:00):
you know that,
Leah (43:00):
talking about how you look?
Respond to your
Willow (43:03):
there's a whole, there's a whole great practice that, um,
that you can do with yourpartner where you just basically
are just going from the top oftheir head all the way down
through the bottom of their feetand appreciating every little
thing about them.
I appreciate your eyes.
There's, you know, the way thatthey, the shape of them, the
(43:24):
sparkle of them, the color ofthem, whatever.
I appreciate the way your lipsare, like, Just loving and
appreciating and it's, you know,it's a really beautiful, kind of
like yoni witnessing, but on thewhole body.
Leah (43:36):
Yeah, Mama Gina calls that a word bath.
When you give someone a wordbath, and you just, you just,
Oh, I love the shape of youreyebrows.
I love the shape of your ears.
I love your collarbone.
I love the swell at the top ofyour breasts.
I love this curve, this arch,this dimple, this mole, this
(43:57):
birthmark, this thing on your
Willow (43:59):
toe.
The scar,
Leah (44:00):
scar, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Willow (44:02):
Yeah.
And so those, that can be awhole practice and it's good,
it's good to use that practiceto start to get good at
expressing and opening yourthroat chakra and your voice and
your words.
And you can do it with a friend.
It doesn't have to be sexual.
So there's like so many ways toutilize this practice.
(44:22):
And then, you know,
Leah (44:24):
cathartically healing, like especially when you don't
like your body and you have hada struggle liking yourself and
not seeing how beautiful youare, when someone gives you that
gift and you're, you have toreally practice on not
deflecting the gift that they'regiving, but allow yourself to
Yes, to experience their truthand to feel it and to take it in
(44:47):
and the tears that flow fromthere are so cleansing and so
healing.
Fuck, I want everyone to dothat.
That's like mandatory homework.
Willow (44:55):
Do that homework and then write in, and then write in
the comments and let us know howit went.
Leah (45:01):
You don't, you don't need a partner to do that either.
You can stand in front of themirror and give yourself a word
bath.
Willow (45:07):
Yeah, mirror practice.
And so when you have more, likewhen you do that as a, as a
bigger solid practice, then it'seasy.
Like, let's say you've justfinished making love and you're
just laying there and you'rejust caressing the curve of your
partner's neck or something.
They're on their side.
You're caressing the curve oftheir hip or their shoulder or
(45:28):
whatever.
And you, and your words justflow like, Oh my God, I love the
way this looks.
This curve feels against myfingers.
Oh my god, this curve of yourside boob is just so smokin hot.
You
Leah (45:40):
Fills my hands just beautifully.
Yeah.
Willow (45:44):
yeah, so you want to, um, bigger practices.
This is the same as likemeditation.
If you go to a meditationretreat, you're gonna have, have
such a different kind of ongoingdaily meditation practice, you
know, so these bigger practicesthat you implement, we often
will teach couples to, um, do atleast two tantric practices per
(46:07):
month.
And that's going to inform therest of their sexuality the rest
of the month.
It's going to be totallydifferent.
Leah (46:13):
also just a great way of finding out what.
causes you to press the brakes,what causes you to press the
accelerator.
And I just, I want to also givesome, like, there's a range.
When I first started this work,there was shit I could not
believe.
And then later came to believe.
There was stuff I could nothear.
That later I was able to hear soit's a journey
Willow (46:34):
believe about yourself?
Like if somebody was like,you're so
Leah (46:39):
if someone said I love your creamy thighs I would have
gotten a stomachache.
it was too painful to believeand then now someone said I love
it Love your creamy thighs, Iwould grab the fat of them and
like make them lick them, youknow, and scratch them up and do
something more to it.
Like it's, it's, there's anevolution.
What causes the breaks for youtoday may turn into an
accelerator later if you stayopen.
(47:01):
If you stay willing to beinfluenced by what opens someone
else due to your presence,eventually it may open you too.
So it's like, it's just a reallyopen minded through the process.
And that's really goodinformation.
You, you may hear somebody saysomething like if somebody.
When someone called, uh, Willowa dirty little girl, she may,
(47:22):
that may cause her to press thebrakes.
And that's good information forher partner, like she said in
the beginning of the episode.
When you kind of experience aword bath, you'll get
information about what was hardto hear, what was easy to hear,
and that's amazing informationfor someone to know so they can
keep opening you.
Um, so if you don't know whatyou like.
(47:44):
You gotta try some of thesethings on in the heat of the
moment to find out if it worksfor you.
So really, we always will saythis, it all comes back to
having a curious mind and awillingness to be on an
adventure.
Willow (47:58):
Yep, the journey never ends, my friends.
It just keeps going and growingand evolving and there's so
much, there's so muchPhenomenalness to explore, and
there's contraction points alongthe way too that hurt.
So you, you get more resilient,you get better, uh, um, at
(48:20):
navigating all of it, thecontra, contractions and the
Leah (48:23):
know, what's interesting is this phenomenon over the
last, I don't know, 10 years ormore of dick pics and I never
understood the dick pic.
I was like this, this is not aturn on to me.
This just seems like this reallystrange thing, but like what's
really happening with the dickpic?
And what was interesting I wasfollowing the same guy who
mentioned to tell woman that Herpussy is yours.
(48:47):
It will make her wet.
Um, he, I watched a video of hisand it was, instead of sending
her a dick pic, what you senther, wear the gray sweatpants.
Have a fullness in your cock.
Take a picture of your cockbulging in front of, you know,
within the sweatpants.
That is a much more, that willturn her on more than actually
(49:09):
seeing your dick because theirimagination gets activated.
so if you can plug into awoman's imagination, then you
can plug into her Eros.
And I thought, oh, that's very
Willow (49:21):
I wonder
Leah (49:21):
I wondered, is that would that be true for me?
What about you?
Willow (49:25):
Well I think so, it's definitely less of like a turn
off, like dick pics for me are aturn off, but, and so as we're
having this moment ofconversation I'm wondering, I'm
wondering if like, men think Itis a, like, I always feel like
they're doing it for the shockfactor, but I wonder if they're
doing it because they're like,so proud of their cock and
(49:47):
they're like, this is definitelygoing to have to turn her on
because I'm so turned on andwhat would turn them on probably
is a straight up picture of the,of a pussy.
They don't need, yeah.
Or it's just, they don't needclothes over to get turned
Leah (50:02):
think, I
Willow (50:03):
with a Yoni it's hard on,
Leah (50:04):
think it's kind of the way some men touch a clitoris too
hard.
They're doing what feels good totheir genitals.
So they're trying to turn her onby what turns them on, which
doesn't always translate betweenthe two brains.
Between the estrogen brain andthe testosterone brain, though
we,
Willow (50:23):
If you have not read The Male Brain and The Female Brain,
please do not pass go.
Go get those books.
Read those books.
You have to read those books.
Those two books will tell youeverything you'd ever want to
know about the male brain andthe female brain.
I mean, it's phenomenal howdifferent
Leah (50:40):
they
Willow (50:40):
different they
Leah (50:41):
what it comes down to and kind of closing for this episode
is we got to talk more.
we have to normalize these typesof conversations between our
friend groups so that we canprocess this.
I know that it'd be a lot easierfor me to process these turn ons
and what I want to hear byhearing what my, turns my
friends on.
Hear what's worked for them.
So I can kind of go, would thatwork for me?
(51:02):
How do I feel about that?
And then, Oh, this happened.
And having a safe place toprocess what opens you and what
closes you, what turns you on,what turns you off, I think we
need to do that in our socialgroups.
And then we need to have theseconversations with potential
partners, with our currentpartners, so that we can open up
to more arousal and more turn onand find out like what lits that
(51:23):
fire.
Practice saying some of thesescary things out loud because
it's really vulnerable to sayout loud the things you want to
hear because you don't know ifthat's gonna turn off your
partner.
Sometimes it's gonna be a missand hopefully we'll just have a
sense of humor about it insteadof making a fight about it
Willow (51:41):
That's right.
Yeah.
So stay curious, explore yourattunement to yourself and to
others and really, you know,
Leah (51:49):
Yeah, take
Willow (51:50):
Like it's okay if somebody doesn't, yeah, it's
okay if somebody doesn't want tosay dirty little slut to you.
Leah (51:56):
well or
Willow (51:57):
a big deal.
Move on.
What else do you want to hear?
Leah (51:59):
a little right
Willow (52:00):
it a thing.
Leah (52:01):
doesn't have to be a deal breaker Fine fine to go around.
Yeah Yeah.
All right, well this was fun.
yeah, Uh, by the way, that, uh,the Instagram account that we
mentioned, his link will be inthe show notes.
I don't know his name.
Okay.
Love, love, love.
Announcer (52:20):
Thanks for tuning in.
This episode was hosted byTantric Sex Master Coach and
Positive Psychology Facilitator,Leah Piper, as well as by
Chinese and Functional MedicineDoctor and Taoist Sexology
Teacher, Dr.
Willow Brown.
Don't forget, your comments,likes, subscribes and
suggestions matter.
Let's realize this new worldtogether.
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