May 13, 2025 • 45 mins
What if your child's greatest challenges are actually their most profound spiritual gifts?
Every parent has felt that moment of worry when comparing their child to others or receiving a discouraging evaluation from a teacher or therapist. We're conditioned to focus on what our children lack rather than the extraordinary qualities they bring. But what if there's a profound spiritual purpose behind your child's unique traits and challenges?
Akashic Records reader and energy coach Kanika Vasudeva transforms our understanding of neurodiversity and sensitivity in children by revealing the deeper spiritual framework at play. Each child arrives precisely as they're meant to be—not randomly, but deliberately chosen to heal ancestral patterns and bring specific gifts to their lineage. Those very qualities that might be labeled as deficits in conventional settings often mask extraordinary spiritual connections and capabilities.
"These kids are hitting the ground running," Kanika explains, revealing how souls actually compete for bodies that will experience challenges because they offer accelerated spiritual growth. A child who struggles with traditional academics may be developing profound empathy; a child with speech delays might be preparing to become an extraordinary communicator who speaks deeply to people's hearts.
For overwhelmed parents, Kanika offers practical energy management techniques, from simple one-minute breathing breaks to playful visualization exercises you can teach your children. These grounding practices help sensitive kids discharge overwhelming energy much like electrical appliances use earthing wires to release excess charge.
Perhaps most healing is the invitation to shift your questions from "What's wrong with my child?" to "What is my child bringing for me?" and "What part of myself needs healing when I focus on my child's perceived deficiencies?" As we break free from society's rigid expectations, we create space for both ourselves and our children to embody authenticity and purpose.
Connect with Kanika Vasudeva:
*Website: https://artoflifecenter.com/
*Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kanikaenergycoach/
*YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@kanikaenergycoach
*Download my free 3-part audio series: Soul Contracts in Parent
Quiz time! Take my new Spiritual Parent Vibe quiz and meet your magical type:
https://www.tryinteract.com/share/quiz/683e320bf64af70015fae432
New! Conscious Family Travels Channel on YouTube with Carrie:
https://www.youtube.com/@consciousfamilytravels
Connect with Carrie:
*Website: https://hearttoheartlife.com/
*Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespiritualparent
*YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpiritualParent
*Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/The-Spiritual-Parent/61554482625081
*Email: info@hearttoheartlife.com
**Please remember that the information shared on this podcast is educational in nature and does not constitute licensed mental health advice. If you need such advice, you should speak with a licensed professional about your unique si
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kanika Vasudeva (00:01):
and they knew very well what we're going to be
, how we are going to be, whatwe're going to be supposedly
lacking in or what things we'llhave.
But they wanted to bring thatbecause they wanted the lineage
to understand.
So each of us is chosen to healour lineages like it's really
(00:21):
every single one of us,including our kids.
Kids is a blessing.
So when we see them as anythingless, we are not seeing the
full picture.
If they're seeing the odd oneout, we needed that odd one out,
and what you need to askinstead is what is my child
bringing for me?
Why do I have this?
And especially wherever you feellike really the big lack, like
(00:43):
you feel like, oh, my child'snot, you know, getting this.
My child's perhaps not able todo academics really well, or my
child's not able to sit downreally well, I want you to start
thinking what part of youreally wants that as in.
Is it your ego part?
Do you want to be like the coolparent who has got the perfect
child?
What part is it that's wantingthat Like?
(01:04):
Heal that within yourself.
Carrie Lingenfelter (01:11):
Hi Conscious Parents.
It's Keri here and I am herewith a little info about raising
our mindful kids.
I've got some tips and tricksabout breaking free of the box
and becoming who you are andteaching your kids how to do
that along the way, Join us Hithere and welcome back, you guys
.
I have an amazing guest heretoday, Kanika Vasudeva, and she
is an Akasic Records reader andan energy coach and a parent as
(01:32):
well.
I'm so excited to connect withyou, Kanika.
Thank you so much for beinghere today.
Kanika Vasudeva (01:38):
Thanks a lot.
I am so glad to be here.
Carrie Lingenfelter (01:41):
Yes, and I'm so excited to finally hit
record because you and I werehaving such a wonderful chat
this morning.
So this morning for me, but Iknow it's later for you, and so
actually can we jump right in.
I would love to ask you, Ithink, as a parent and I'm
switching gears I'm going to askyou how best do we regulate our
(02:02):
own energy as a parent?
I feel like my husband wouldlove this question.
He's, he's very, he worksreally hard at work and has a
very intense job, and so thencoming home and if we're having
intense energy in our house,it's a lot.
So what would you say for these?
Kanika Vasudeva (02:20):
parents.
I love your question, first ofall because I think, as parents,
a lot of us do pull on multiplehats.
You know, we have our workgoing on, we might have other
stresses going on related tofamily life, there might be
something else happening withour friends, with our family,
and then we've got our kids andit's almost like another
(02:41):
full-time job having your kids,because you want to be present
for them, you want to have theenergy for them.
But there's also you in thebackground who's getting
sometimes just overwhelmed,who's actually sometimes getting
a lot overworked.
Especially when your kids areasking you for attention and
you've given a full day oryou've had a tough thing, it's
(03:01):
very hard.
So well, I think, first of all,just recognizing that that is
amazing by itself, like knowingthat you've got to look after
your energy and typically when Iam like that, I'll take a
minute or I'll take, you know,just just a few little breaths,
(03:22):
if I can, if just to collectmyself before I can step into
that moment.
So even just a one minute.
Or if you're doing a pickupdrop off, just taking two
minutes listening to somethingon the car, that just helps you
relax, that is really good Ifit's really, really stressful.
Even just going to the toilet,taking a little break and just
(03:45):
taking that one minute just tosit down, just to breathe, like
breathe, take the breath in,really let it come into you and
then exhale out.
Imagine the stress is comingout.
If that's all you can do,that's still good enough.
It's okay.
Now there are times like with myson as well, and perhaps for
other kids as well they mightfeel like well, you've just come
(04:08):
in and you're not listening tous.
You know you're not present forus.
Like you still want this momentand I have just met you and I
want to tell you all my troublesor all my things you know.
And what I've learned to sayand tell my kids and I hope
other parents can do as well isjust tell them that hey, you
know I'm overwhelmed right nowand I need to calm myself down.
(04:30):
There's nothing that you havedone wrong.
I love you, but I just need toreally calm myself now and just
give me one minute.
I'll be back, but giving them atime frame, like one minute
minutes, I just need to be quietfor one minute and then usually
, even if they don't understandit like they start understanding
in some time.
(04:51):
But just setting that littleboundary and taking that little
moment for yourself, that can bea big, big shift, I find.
Carrie Lingenfelter (04:59):
Yeah, I love that example.
I think when we're telling ourkids how we're monitoring our
own energy or taking our ownbreaks for ourselves, that's
such a good example for our kids.
How do we teach, how do we helpour gifted and sensitive kids
protect their own energy andnavigate overwhelm in their
(05:20):
lives?
They overwhelm in their lives.
Kanika Vasudeva (05:24):
Yeah.
So I think that's the firststep, where that's we do it,
like they notice that we aredoing this.
Then I usually like to walk thekids with a little bit
meditation as well, like usuallyif we are raising such kids.
We have got lots of tools fromother therapists, their other
techniques that we've learnedourselves.
(05:45):
My favorite one is grounding,where I really teach my son also
to ground, which is justimagining that where you're
sitting, you just imagine thatyour legs get longer and longer
and they go right into thecenter of the earth and you can
make it funny because you knowyou can make it interesting for
(06:06):
them.
It doesn't have to be serious.
So I just say oh well, you'vegot a monkey tail.
There's a monkey tail and thatgoes from your back.
It's going all the way to thecenter of the earth and now I'm
imagining these colors flowingdown.
Just play, play with theirimagination, whatever works with
them, but teach them how to letgo of stress.
So sometimes it could beletting colors flow through them
(06:29):
.
It could be.
Well, you've got lots of stones, you know, let's throw this
person away.
This person said something,let's just throw that into the
ground.
We don't like that.
So just using imagery that theylike and helping them throw
that stuff away, because you'regiving them agency.
Well, we don't like this.
Whatever that heaviness is, um,let's say wherever they felt
(06:51):
that they couldn't do something,sometimes even the stress of
that.
Well, it's so difficult.
Why don't we take all thedifficulty and just throw it
away and, um, so that's howyou're helping them ground.
Now, grounding is a beautifultechnique, you know.
Yes, it's a meditationtechnique, but the science
(07:12):
behind grounding is that it'slike a conductor that really
helps us, an electric conductorthat really helps us release our
negative charges.
An electric conductor thatreally helps us release our
negative charges.
You know, all the electricalappliances that we have in our
houses, like a toaster, like aniron, even like the fridge, like
(07:32):
all the electrical appliances,they have an earthing wire.
The reason they have theearthing wire is because that is
meant to connect to the earthif there's any fault.
So the excess negative chargegoes into the earth.
So when you're teaching a child, or when we are doing this
ourselves, and when we aregrounding, we are walking
(07:55):
ungrounded.
Really, we're walking like withno discharge for our negative
feelings, like whateverheaviness we feel over.
That's all there, right?
So when we ground, when westart teaching them that we help
them with this.
And so once you help themground, a lot of the times I
find that that starts shifting,like the body starts easing into
(08:16):
it.
Work with your child in terms ofwhat really works for them,
right, your child might be verysensory so you can tell them ah,
you know.
So now your shoulders aredropping or it feels soft, it
feels like whatever they areused to.
Bring those senses into them.
If they like smells.
(08:36):
Well, this is how it feels like.
Well, let's see, you canimagine things that they would
see.
This is how it feels like.
But bring those senses to themthat they would see.
This is how it feels like, butbring those senses to them
whatever they would like.
If they're very much into, let'ssay, unicorns, you can bring
those unicorns in, because oncewe've discharged, we want to
fill the space and we want tofill it with something that they
(08:59):
would find interesting.
So I always connect them to thesun.
We always imagine the sunlightpouring with gold sparkles
coming in, and you can bring inthat.
Well, you know, what do we wantthe sun to bring for us?
Oh, let's bring us someadventure.
You know we would like to playwith cars, like my son loves
cars, loves anything but speed,and so on.
But bring that imagery in.
(09:20):
If it's nighttime, you couldtell them well, now there's some
unicorn coming in or there'sfairies who want to come and who
want to sleep with you.
What would you like to dreamabout?
But do it per the day, do itper what your child really likes
.
But bring these two elements,bring the earth, bring the sun
(09:41):
and just let them do the workfor you.
Bring imagery and bring storyinto it, so that they're
meditating without even knowingit.
But it will really help themrelax because you have given
them a space to ground, let goof the heaviness that they're
feeling, and then you'rebringing in, filling in with the
vibration that they would liketo have.
Carrie Lingenfelter (10:02):
Yes, we love to do that every night at
bedtime.
It's great, I love that and Ilove the way that you're
describing grounding.
I think is wonderful to defineit in that way and we can do
that for our kids.
I love what you're saying.
We can bring it to their thechildren's level, so it's
wonderful.
Kanika Vasudeva (10:22):
Okay, not making making it complicated,
like just working with them.
In fact, I think this is whatwe can learn as parents.
Often we are more serious kidshave a lot more fun and play to
them yes, yes, bringing it intotheir world and whatever they're
into.
Carrie Lingenfelter (10:37):
My son was into orcas for a long time, so I
would do meditations with orcas, like, like you're saying,
you're bringing in whateverspirit animal they're drawn to
at the time, whatever's in theiruniverse right now that they're
connected to, I love that.
Okay, so, as I'm thinking aboutenergy in my house, I've been
(10:57):
talking about this a lot with myfamily, so it's really
interesting.
You and I were actuallyspeaking about names before I
hit record today and we weretalking about how it's
interesting because our parentsare choosing our names for us,
right?
And it was interesting becausewhen I was pregnant, I was
telling you, when I was pregnantwith my kids, I went to a
psychic or a medium and I askeddo my kids like these names?
(11:23):
And it was really interestingbecause they were like, yes,
they love this name and this isa name that they probably won't
ever change to like a moreformal version, cause I have
little nicknames for my kidswhile they're little and they
said my son will probably keephis nickname his whole time.
Well, that's really cool, but Iam not sure my name has a
meaning.
That's connected to my father'sside of the family and I never
(11:50):
really took to that connection.
So when we give a name, it'sinteresting and I was very
thoughtful when I named mydaughter.
She has the same middle name asme and I thought is it okay to
do this?
Because then I'm bringing inpieces of myself to her, but I
want her to be her own.
What are your thoughts on names?
And then also like generalgenerational emotional patterns
(12:12):
that can pass down to or how wecan work on those?
That's two separate questions,but you can choose where you
want to start no, no, I lovethat.
Kanika Vasudeva (12:20):
I love that.
I think it's a beautiful thingand, like we were talking about
that as well, I have a moonmeditation class that I did some
time ago and that one was onowning your name, and all the
participants in my class none ofthem really liked their name
fully Wow, I believe that a lotof us on this planet, too, sort
(12:44):
of have our names, but there'ssomething that we don't like
about it and that could bedifferent things.
It may or may not even be thesurname.
Usually, even as a first namelike, if I give my example right
my name is Kanika.
It comes from the Hindi wordkanak.
Kanak is a small wheat grain,like one grain of wheat in Hindi
(13:07):
, and that wheat grain.
That name was given becausewheat is like the staple diet in
North India and that's like thegold, so to speak, because when
you have wheat you have enoughto feed and so on, and so it was
that small grain that I wasnamed after.
So my name literally is a smallpart of something big, and I
(13:28):
hated that you're the tiny partthat's hard, that's hard to take
in when you're a kid.
Yeah, you want to expand thetiny part of something big, and
I'm like what the what does thatmean?
Right, like you know like, giveme a name.
Carrie Lingenfelter (13:52):
It just means so small when you're
wanting to expand, right.
So many children are wanting toexpand into their own and grow.
Yeah yeah.
Kanika Vasudeva (14:03):
So when I looked at my name and it's a
common name, by the way likenothing against, you know my
parents who named me I don'tthink that they were thinking
like that Very opposite, butthis is what I was taking away,
and I did not like feeling smallat all.
As I've grown up, though, I'vestarted understanding that the
(14:25):
name also means I'm a small partof something big, means I'm
creating something big.
It means that, yes, it startswith a very small, humble
beginning, but there are bigshifts happening, and I love
that, because the work that I'mdoing I really want to expand
out more and more, touch as manypeople as I can.
So I'm so happy to be a ripple,to cause that ripple effect,
(14:49):
like just that little smallstone that causes those ripples.
I just love that now.
But it's taken me time to growinto it, and what's really
shifted in between is, I guess,understanding.
Um, also, I suppose you knowwhen I say ego, it was more how
(15:09):
I wanted to feel.
How should I explain that?
How I wanted to feel like I amimportant, and it's taken
understanding my importance witha lot more fullness.
It's not that I am notimportant, but it is that we all
have this vast consciousnessaround us and we're all little
(15:32):
threads connecting into thatsame thing.
You know that piece of oneness.
So we are all like a littlepart of that.
And one analogy that I lovethere is that if I am the human
and I just imagine myself and Iimagine myself on this big,
massive earth, so I'm like justreally tiny in comparison with
the earth.
If I extrapolate that and startdoing that for the solar system
(15:54):
, for the universe, like I'mreally really tiny, it's okay.
But it's taken time tounderstand that perspective.
I do think that whoever names usnames us in some sense because
there is something that they'vetuned into, there's some purpose
, there's some bigger thing thatthey're bringing on there.
(16:15):
What we do need to do is wejust need to get okay, first of
all, with that name, or even ifyou're wanting to rename
ourselves at some point in time,we need to think, like you know
, I guess you were very smart.
You looked at your kids and youasked their spirits what is the
name you want to have?
And then choose something ofyour liking, like otherwise,
(16:36):
just changing a name is notchanging things for you, the
people who go and add someletters to it or change the name
, but you need to like it.
You need to know the essenceand whatever that is and do that
um.
So that's one thing that if youwant to change your name, by
all means okay, but but gethappy, accept your new name
(17:00):
first, really resonate with thatenergy, know what you're going
for and then do that.
You'll find it a lot easier.
There's also karma that we cancarry from our lineages.
Whatever side we get that from,I usually find that every soul
comes in from you.
Know, soul wise.
They're either coming in fromtheir dad's side or from their
(17:21):
mom's side, in terms of theancient um.
Well, both mom and dad.
So when we're all born, we'retaking earth energy, we're
taking energy as a soul toincarnate, we take for the body
energy.
We're also taking a part of ourmom or a part of our dad, both.
But there's usually one sidethat's going to be stronger,
(17:43):
this one side which says well,you know you should be born here
because we want to have theshift in our um line, so to
speak.
This is what you want to bringin.
So they're, they're reallyrooting, they want us there.
Both of these lines willusually have one leader, one
senior person, so to speak,who's handling, sort of like the
(18:03):
torchbearer, you know, carryingthat part.
So we carry that, and usuallythe souls will come from one
side, which is why it doesn'tmatter how you are physically
close to one parent or so on.
But you would find that when youare dreaming, like there's one
part of the family which sort ofcomes more in your dreams again
(18:25):
and again that could be withyour name as well that there's
one place that you're bringingthat from, especially if you
have that, then there is thosegenerational patterns that you
also need to work with you.
Um, I've had these two, uh, twosides.
Like I know, sometimes peoplejust hate their ancestors.
(18:46):
They're like, you know, they'rejust giving me, like my family
had to go through, let's say,some wars, or they have a lot of
survival stuff in them.
I guess a lot of our familieswould have those survival things
, because that's how humans haveevolved to this stage, right,
and there's a viewpoint wherepeople are like, well, I don't
want to have, like I just wantto be as away from my ancestors
(19:08):
as possible so that they cannotcome into my energy at all.
But what I really find is that,well, you're trying to sort of
push away part of yourself.
When you're trying to reallynot just push them away and
we've also got energy from them,we really come from them.
You're almost, um, like this ishow you were born, this is how
(19:33):
you come.
I often find, on the other hand, like when you start working
with that, you start workingwith those scars, you start
healing that there's a lot ofthe ancestral gifts, blessings,
that start coming through andonce you become conscious, it's
not super hard to clean theancestral bits that that made
(19:56):
you.
But once you've cleaned that,there's just so much power boost
that you get from that becauseyou tap into a lot more.
Um, you tap into the gifts, youtap into the healing.
You've also brought themforward, so you get their
blessings as well okay, wow,that's interesting to think
about the blessings too.
Carrie Lingenfelter (20:14):
Yeah, because I think we always talk
about the trauma piece, but whatare the gifts or the blessings
that come with it too?
Kanika Vasudeva (20:21):
so that's interesting because you know we
have our own blessings, like asas a soul, with the life that
we've incarnated.
There might be lies whereyou've done some similar work
before you've been a priestess,or you've had some spiritual
gifts, or you've led big placesand so on.
But imagine if you could alsotap into the ancestral gifts
(20:42):
that you had.
Then life becomes a lot easier.
It's always good to have thisbig team with you.
The bigger the better.
Right, so you could fight themand you could go.
Okay, I don't want to see themat all, but hang on, they've
also helped you come into theworld.
So if you could just do thatlittle work because often for
(21:02):
them they're just waiting thatthere's certain things that they
wanted to learn and that's whythey've got you, because they
wanted you to be here so thatthey could see an example.
They actually want to supportyou, but they're just feeling
hurt somewhere.
They just need that hurt to betended to.
Once you can do that, then youcan start tapping into their
gifts as well.
Like some of your ancestorsmight be very good with money,
(21:23):
some of your ancestors mighthave very ancient plant wisdom
that you will suddenly startunlocking.
Some of them might be very goodwith animals, you know, and
you'll start feeling like thosedownloads start coming into you
just because you've healed thatpart and now you have access to
that pool of knowledge.
Carrie Lingenfelter (21:42):
Wow, that's beautiful.
I love that.
I'm thinking in my minds, aswe're talking, about the idea of
them bringing in the spiritinto this life.
What are your thoughts on thekids being born today that are
coming either, so connected?
(22:03):
Sometimes they have labels.
In the US we like to label thema lot with, you know,
neurodiverse labels.
What are your thoughts on this?
Kanika Vasudeva (22:13):
that's going on , yeah yeah, thanks for asking
the question as well, because Ithink it would really help a lot
of the parents too as well,because I think it would really
help a lot of the parents toparents of sensitive kids,
parents of kids with any sort ofspecial needs.
(22:34):
Um, so, you know, in our liveson on earth, we all will gather
karma and karma.
So before I go into thisquestion, I really need to talk
about karma.
So karma and that explanationmight be a little bit different
(22:55):
to what you've been taughtbefore, what you've learned
before, so just bear with mewhile I'm sharing this.
So karma to me is a lot aroundlearning.
It's not around, like you, titfor tat.
It's not like one personmurdered someone in one lifetime
, so then this lifetime theyshould get murdered.
Because if that was the case,if this, if just absolute, that
(23:16):
equality was the case, then youknow the murdering would never
stop.
Because one person's murdered,then you know they, then someone
else has to murder them andlife on earth would not evolve,
right?
So in my opinion, karma is morethis concept, so that we all
(23:39):
understand we all evolve ashuman beings.
Um, the other thing we wouldhear is oh, earth is on the 3d
dimension.
Right now we want to go to 5d,which is more harmonious, which
is more connected.
So we have this concept ofkarma.
Now, um, how does karma reallyhappen?
Like, when do I get the badpoints?
When do I get the right points?
(24:01):
For the soul, there's nothingis good or bad, but again, I
still need to learn.
Let's say, I've taken somethingfrom someone, I've snatched a
lot of money from someone.
I need to be, you know,learning how to not do that and
how to have more harmony.
I need to see the effects of it, right.
So it's all based on when was Iable to make those decisions?
When was I able to make thosedecisions?
(24:23):
When was I able to understandthat this is what I'm doing?
And then this is the output ofthat.
So, so to say, like you know,like, let's say, if a kid is two
years old and the two year oldis, like you know, maybe
sometimes even pulling theirmom's hair or so on, you know,
would you give that child karmafor that?
Like you know their mom's hair,or so on, you know, would you
(24:44):
give that child karma for that?
Like you know, that childdoesn't know, like it's just a
normal, they're just growing upright.
So the karmic points, or how itworks, is in the sense of, well,
when you understanding what isreally happening and then how
(25:04):
are you doing things correct?
So now, if we look at thesekids and we look at, well,
what's happening for them, ifyou, it's actually a far more
easier experience for the soulbecause there are these lives
where they can come in, you know, a life where they can actually
(25:26):
understand for a lot more, theycan do things for a lot more,
but it's more or less.
They don't get the bad karmapoints because they're taking
longer to understand, becausethey don't have that agency.
The truth is that there is alot of competition for bodies,
for souls, to incarnate on earth.
(25:47):
There's a lot of competition.
There's higher competition forbodies that are going to be
handicapped or so-called specialand so on, because when the
souls incarnate in those, justbecause a anyways, because life
is going to be hard, you'regoing to work out a lot of karma
.
You're going to learn a lot ofthings too.
You're not karmically, you'renot going to have as many bad
(26:11):
points anyway, whereas you getto clean a lot of the karma.
So a lot of times when souls areincarnating in this.
They tend to be the karmicsouls, like there is a lot that
they want to work through andthen there's a lot that they're
carrying with them, andtypically their caregivers will
also have some sort of thing tolearn from them.
(26:31):
But it's not like, hey,everything is just karmic and
everything is like you know, nowyou're just doomed because this
is this life.
It's not that you're learningin the process as well.
There's a lot that these kids,special kids, are teaching us.
Sometimes we need to slow down,we need to have the patience we
need.
They teach us so muchunconditional love.
There's so much tapped intoconsciousness.
(26:54):
They're actually teaching usall of those things like just
being connected to theconsciousness.
I guess a lot of us become themore conscious parents, awakened
parents because of our kids,because they force us to see
that.
Oh yeah, they force us to seethat, whereas otherwise we could
(27:16):
have continued the same ratrace.
So it's like a win-win on bothsides and often, as we're
working out all of that, as weare learning, you know, the kids
shape up as well.
The parents.
Their lives have been changed,but it's a much faster growth in
terms of evolution.
Carrie Lingenfelter (27:34):
Yeah, wow, yeah.
That's a lot to think about andI don't know when you're
raising these kids.
I don't know how you do itwithout becoming conscious,
because I feel like the more ifyou turn away from the conscious
pieces, if you turn away andyou try to continue down that
same path, the louder and moreresistant the kids become.
Kanika Vasudeva (27:55):
Oh yeah.
From my experience that too, andI think just the whole system
is.
So you know, like it puts youdown so much.
Like when you have kids likethat, whatever you go to the
therapist, you go to the schoolyou go to, so on, like you just
never get good news.
It's just one thing after theother, after the other, the
other, and you're like, okay, Iget it, but like you know,
(28:17):
somebody tell me likesomething's better here,
something's going to be okay,that I'm doing fine.
So it's almost like we hit intothat wall and it's just such a
different journey.
I guess even a lot parentgroups, everybody has their own
journey with their kid and oftenthere's still a sense of
(28:38):
isolation, because what you'reexperiencing with your child in
your family dynamic, that can bevery different to what other
parents are feeling, maybe alittle bit similar, but it can
be a lot more different.
So we have to tune in to otherthings, we have to ask for help.
But I think that is thebeautiful thing, that is the
beauty.
(28:58):
These kids are the ones asthey're so special because
they're going to show us so muchlight.
I often think of other dyslexickids or other special kids in
the world.
You know, um, like steve jobs.
Thank god he was dyslexic.
Thank God for that, because ifhe wasn't, our world would be so
(29:19):
different.
And yet, when he was growing up, I'm sure his parents were told
all the time that there was aproblem with him and he doesn't
know how to write and how thatis so problematic, and so on.
You look at the world'sgeniuses and look at how, when
they were growing up, they weresomehow out of character.
(29:41):
But it's out of characterbecause they don't fit into the
mold that we understand on earth.
It's a very simple 3d plane ingeneral.
You know we have a few labelslike this is normal.
You're outside it.
We don't really understand whatto do with you.
So we will give you a speciallabel and we will say that you
know there's something lackingwith you, because I cannot
(30:03):
understand what you've got tooffer really you know it's.
Carrie Lingenfelter (30:09):
It's so beautiful to have these messages
for these parents because, likeyou said, when we go to the
therapist and I I used to be aspeech therapist I used to see
how we would list off the painpoints for parents here's where
they're lacking, here's wherethey should be, here's where
they're not.
Here's the other problem.
Let me list 85 problems.
(30:31):
And then the parent walks outwith that piece of paper listing
85 problems about theirprecious, perfect born child
that you know, you're soconnected to.
And it's beautiful that we'renow seeing these spiritual
connections and having that totune into as parents, because it
gives us that hope that we needand it gives us that connection
(30:55):
with ourselves and thatconnection with our kids that we
need in raising these kidsright now.
Kanika Vasudeva (31:01):
Yeah, and here's this message that I've
got to give to all the parentshere that if you've got these
kids, you know the world labelsit, let's say, as a weakness or
labels it in whatever form itwants to, because it does not
understand.
If the whole world was made ofthe same people, we would not
(31:21):
have anyone looking at thingsdifferently like these, the very
points that right now areweaknesses, they're going to be
blessings in some sense.
These kids come to work offsomething really special and the
other way to think of it isthat they hit the ground running
, like they come in charged withwell, this is what I've got to
(31:43):
do.
This is what I've got to learn.
You know, I've got to learnempathy.
I want to understand lackmyself, I want to lack certain
things so that I can reallyunderstand empathy, that I can
really get along and understandwhat is someone else's pain,
like.
Think of the big hearts thatthese kids have.
Think of the resilience thesekids have because they've got to
(32:04):
do a couple of things again andagain, like compared to other
kids who can probably go out,play, like, do the normal things
, and they don't have tostruggle as much.
These kids grow up having a lotof challenges and that makes
them very resilient, that makesthem far more sensitive beyond
what words or teachers couldteach or books could teach.
(32:27):
But they just end up with a lotmore depth and we need that.
We need that to shift the worldinto a space where there's a
lot more unity, where there's alot more harmony.
Also, these kids aretremendously gifted in the sense
that they are more tuned intotheir consciousness.
I guess, as parents, you know,if we could probably not worry
(32:54):
about it too much and we couldjust trust, we could trust in
their fullness more, then we'llstart seeing that they're
actually more amazing.
I used to get really, reallyworried with my son a lot of
times because I would get, likeyou know, this is lacking, this
is lacking, like you said, listsand so on.
(33:14):
Right, I would get a lot ofthat and for a while, every time
I would get that, I would lookat my so-called perfect child
and suddenly he would seem veryimperfect because I would notice
, I would look through the samelabels and go, yep, that is not
like other kids.
No, that's not like other kids.
You know, that is not likeother kids.
(33:35):
No, that's not like other kids,you know, and you do that.
And then what I have actuallydone in that moment is that the
world was seeing him through hislack and I'm also seeing him
through his lack, and so after awhile I said you know what, I'm
not doing this anymore.
Carrie Lingenfelter (33:49):
Put it away .
Yes, put it away, put it in adrawer.
Kanika Vasudeva (33:55):
Yeah, yeah, like I'm not going to do that
torture for him.
I'm not going to do thattorture for him because there's
brilliance that he brings andI'm just going to notice the
brilliance instead.
But it's different once youstart noticing the brilliance
it's really different.
Um, because you start seeingthat, the amazing senses they
(34:16):
have, you start seeing.
If I go back to our birth storyand if I go back to you know we
all came from our mother's lineor our father's line, like the
line that really wanted us togrow and evolve and develop.
We were chosen.
Every single one of us waschosen both sides.
As we chose our parents, wechose the body where we will
(34:37):
come, in the same way that wewere also chosen on the other
side, like our lineages chose usas well, and they knew very
well what we're going to be, howwe are going to be, what we're
going to be supposedly lackingin or what things we'll have.
But they wanted to bring thatbecause they wanted the lineage
to understand.
(34:57):
So each of us is chosen to healour lineages, like it's really
every single one of us,including our kids, is a
blessing.
So when we see them as anythingless we are, they're not seeing
the full picture.
If they're seeing the odd oneout, we needed that odd one out,
and what you need to to askinstead is what is my child
(35:18):
bringing for me?
What?
Why did I?
Why do I have this?
And especially wherever youfeel like really the big lack,
like you feel like, oh, mychild's not, you know, getting
this, my child's perhaps notable to do academics really well
, or my child's not able to sitdown really well.
I want you to start thinkingwhat part of you really wants
(35:39):
that as in.
Is it your ego part?
Do you want to be like the coolparent who has got the perfect
child?
What part is it that's wantingthat like?
Heal that within yourself.
Yes, why are you wanting that?
You know, like, reallyunderstand that.
Um, is there some part of youthat wants to feel you know,
(36:00):
seen, understood because you fitin with everyone?
Are you fighting that?
What is it?
Accept that bit.
You'll already start seeing thethings shift.
It's not even your child.
The first step is you.
You'll start feeling the shiftwhen you start healing yourself.
Then look at your child andthen go okay, why?
And a lot of our, these parents, would be very intuitive as
(36:22):
well.
So start tuning into why isyour child this way?
Why is he or she?
Why do they have this challengefrom a learning perspective?
You know, as a soul, what is itthat they want to learn?
And then understand that alittle bit more.
Once you understand that it'llgive you a lot more peace,
(36:43):
because for my son, for example,I understood that he just
wanted to experience good amountof lack so that he could be a
lot more empathetic.
He wants funny enough like hehad a speech delay and whenever
I look at him he's always givinga big speech like to a big
audience, which you know, if Iwas to look at it I would go
(37:05):
like my bet would not be on thatside ever.
Yeah, just because of how I'mseeing him grow up in the
physical world.
Right, but he wants to do that.
He really wants to touch asmany people as he can, but in a
very sensitive way, likeunderstanding everyone and
really speaking to their hearts.
And to be able to do that heneeds to understand the lack, he
(37:28):
needs to feel that himself sothat he's really able to serve
his purpose as best as he can.
Once you start doing that, onceyou get that picture, a lot of
the stress, worry that we cancarry as parents that gets
dissolved.
Carrie Lingenfelter (37:45):
It's so spot on.
Thank you so much for sharingthe story of what you're seeing
and visualizing for your son.
I think it's so magical tothink about the shift that he is
possibly going through andgoing to evolve into in this
life.
And you know, it's interestingwhat you were talking about
reflecting back on ourselves asparents.
(38:06):
My husband and I recently werereflecting.
Our son is turning 10 and wefeel like he has this piece of
trying to be perfect to fit in,because he's very sensitive and
very aware of everybody else'senergy and everybody else's
ideas of him.
And we were my husband and Inoticed we were watching a video
(38:28):
of when our son and we werewatching with both of our kids
we like to watch these littleyear-long movies that we call
them from different eras and wewere watching when he was little
and he was so fun andvibratious and just being his
own spirit when he was fouryears old and my daughter said,
buddy, like why?
(38:49):
How come you don't act likethat, like you're?
You don't live like that asmuch now?
You were so much fun before,you cared about being cool.
And it was really interestingbecause my husband and I excuse
me we were wondering why did hedo that?
Why did he shift?
Why did he try to be likeeverybody else and not be
himself when, at the same exactweekend, the same exact time, my
(39:13):
husband and I are also goingthrough our own shifts of not
caring what people around usthink about our family, about
our parenting, about ourspirituality, about being who we
truly are?
So it's so interesting to watchmy husband and I breaking free
of society's box of expectations, of neurotypical box of
(39:37):
expectations of how we'resupposed to work in a family or
in society.
So we're watching this shift inourselves and then we're also
encouraging our son to behimself and talking about true
friendship, what true friendshiplooks like, and accepting
people for who they are.
Kanika Vasudeva (39:54):
I'm so glad and so thankful that you shared
this because this will resonatewith a lot of parents and
particularly when we are on thisjourney spiritual journey or
awakening journey we'll oftenfind that these paths mirror,
because the world is a mirror.
Our kids will reflect what weare going through, so a lot of
(40:17):
what you want to teach to themactually evolve and do that
yourself and talk as much aspossible with your kids.
Oftentimes, I think also if wecan hold space for them where
they can come out and they cantalk as much yeah that is the
time when you know they can bereally open and they can
(40:37):
actually help us see the woundsexactly where we need to heal.
But it's so spot on these kids.
They're such a blessing becausethey come to heal us in so many
ways.
Carrie Lingenfelter (40:49):
Yeah, it's so much there.
They are our biggest teachers.
Yeah, in so many ways sobeautiful.
Thank you so much, Kanika, forhaving this amazing spiritual
parenting chat today.
I really appreciate yourconnection today and I love the
work you're doing.
I love your podcast.
(41:10):
I've been listening this week.
I think you're sharingbeautiful messages with parents.
How can our listeners find you?
Kanika Vasudeva (41:18):
Thanks a lot, carrie.
This has been absolutelyamazing.
We cover such good topics.
It's really been fun.
I can be found at Kaneka EnergyCoach on Instagram, on LinkedIn
and YouTube as well, so that'smy favorite place.
Come ask me questions and Ihave a freebie as well for
parents who might be wonderingaround their parenting contracts
(41:41):
or their karma with their kids.
So that can be found atartoflifecentercom slash parent.
So this is a three-part audioseries and I tell the parents
about their karmic contracts,about their soul contracts with
their kids, and we also get toheal it as well.
(42:02):
Each of the audio is about 10minutes.
It's not too much, but I'mgetting some amazing feedback
with that one.
Carrie Lingenfelter (42:10):
Oh my gosh, I can't wait to check that one
out myself, and we'll includethose in the show notes for
everyone.
I would love to share that.
That's myself, and we'llinclude those in the show notes
for everyone.
I would love to share that.
That's beautiful and what's thename of your podcast?
Again for our listeners.
Kanika Vasudeva (42:22):
So the name of my podcast is Art of Life
Podcast.
I've actually got two podcasts.
One of them is an Art of LifePodcast, where I have guests and
where I do my own talks as wellaround parenting, around
transformation, etc.
Then there's another podcast Ihave which is art of life guided
meditations, and there'ssmaller meditations that I do
(42:45):
for parents but also for otheraudiences, and it's got some
cool meditations, like.
It's got meditations when youare really stressed out, you
cannot sleep.
It's got more spiritualmeditations as well, like if you
feel you've got a spiritualattack.
It's got some meditations toheal the wounds with your mother
, your father as well.
(43:07):
So, yeah, so that's like myyeah, I think that's my special
place that I would just wanteveryone to have access to these
tools where they can releasestress, they can feel better in
the moment, and that's myservice to the world.
Carrie Lingenfelter (43:25):
Beautiful, oh my goodness.
I'm excited to share that withour listeners.
I know so many parents alwayslooking for more guided
meditations and healing guidedmeditations.
That's just two in one.
Thank you so much, kanika, forsharing all of this with us.
Kanika Vasudeva (43:39):
Thank you so much, Keri.
It's been amazing to be on theshow.
Carrie Lingenfelter (43:44):
Well, that's a wrap.
Thanks so much for tuning in.
Changemakers.
This is Keri, and if youhaven't done a review for us
five stars and a little fewwords about what you've enjoyed
in our podcast episodes, wewould really appreciate it.
If you guys would like to evermessage me, I would love any
questions you have or anyfeedback.
At info at heart to heartlifecom, we also have a brand
(44:08):
new website which we're superexcited to share.
It's heart to heart lifecom.
Thanks so much for tuning inand happy life.
Happy times.
Change maker families.
Bye.
and they knew very well what we're going to be
, how we are going to be, whatwe're going to be supposedly
lacking in or what things we'llhave.
But they wanted to bring thatbecause they wanted the lineage
to understand.
So each of us is chosen to healour lineages like it's really
(00:21):
every single one of us,including our kids.
Kids is a blessing.
So when we see them as anythingless, we are not seeing the
full picture.
If they're seeing the odd oneout, we needed that odd one out,
and what you need to askinstead is what is my child
bringing for me?
Why do I have this?
And especially wherever you feellike really the big lack, like
(00:43):
you feel like, oh, my child'snot, you know, getting this.
My child's perhaps not able todo academics really well, or my
child's not able to sit downreally well, I want you to start
thinking what part of youreally wants that as in.
Is it your ego part?
Do you want to be like the coolparent who has got the perfect
child?
What part is it that's wantingthat Like?
(01:04):
Heal that within yourself.
Carrie Lingenfelter (01:11):
Hi Conscious Parents.
It's Keri here and I am herewith a little info about raising
our mindful kids.
I've got some tips and tricksabout breaking free of the box
and becoming who you are andteaching your kids how to do
that along the way, Join us Hithere and welcome back, you guys
.
I have an amazing guest heretoday, Kanika Vasudeva, and she
is an Akasic Records reader andan energy coach and a parent as
(01:32):
well.
I'm so excited to connect withyou, Kanika.
Thank you so much for beinghere today.
Kanika Vasudeva (01:38):
Thanks a lot.
I am so glad to be here.
Carrie Lingenfelter (01:41):
Yes, and I'm so excited to finally hit
record because you and I werehaving such a wonderful chat
this morning.
So this morning for me, but Iknow it's later for you, and so
actually can we jump right in.
I would love to ask you, Ithink, as a parent and I'm
switching gears I'm going to askyou how best do we regulate our
(02:02):
own energy as a parent?
I feel like my husband wouldlove this question.
He's, he's very, he worksreally hard at work and has a
very intense job, and so thencoming home and if we're having
intense energy in our house,it's a lot.
So what would you say for these?
Kanika Vasudeva (02:20):
parents.
I love your question, first ofall because I think, as parents,
a lot of us do pull on multiplehats.
You know, we have our workgoing on, we might have other
stresses going on related tofamily life, there might be
something else happening withour friends, with our family,
and then we've got our kids andit's almost like another
(02:41):
full-time job having your kids,because you want to be present
for them, you want to have theenergy for them.
But there's also you in thebackground who's getting
sometimes just overwhelmed,who's actually sometimes getting
a lot overworked.
Especially when your kids areasking you for attention and
you've given a full day oryou've had a tough thing, it's
(03:01):
very hard.
So well, I think, first of all,just recognizing that that is
amazing by itself, like knowingthat you've got to look after
your energy and typically when Iam like that, I'll take a
minute or I'll take, you know,just just a few little breaths,
(03:22):
if I can, if just to collectmyself before I can step into
that moment.
So even just a one minute.
Or if you're doing a pickupdrop off, just taking two
minutes listening to somethingon the car, that just helps you
relax, that is really good Ifit's really, really stressful.
Even just going to the toilet,taking a little break and just
(03:45):
taking that one minute just tosit down, just to breathe, like
breathe, take the breath in,really let it come into you and
then exhale out.
Imagine the stress is comingout.
If that's all you can do,that's still good enough.
It's okay.
Now there are times like with myson as well, and perhaps for
other kids as well they mightfeel like well, you've just come
(04:08):
in and you're not listening tous.
You know you're not present forus.
Like you still want this momentand I have just met you and I
want to tell you all my troublesor all my things you know.
And what I've learned to sayand tell my kids and I hope
other parents can do as well isjust tell them that hey, you
know I'm overwhelmed right nowand I need to calm myself down.
(04:30):
There's nothing that you havedone wrong.
I love you, but I just need toreally calm myself now and just
give me one minute.
I'll be back, but giving them atime frame, like one minute
minutes, I just need to be quietfor one minute and then usually
, even if they don't understandit like they start understanding
in some time.
(04:51):
But just setting that littleboundary and taking that little
moment for yourself, that can bea big, big shift, I find.
Carrie Lingenfelter (04:59):
Yeah, I love that example.
I think when we're telling ourkids how we're monitoring our
own energy or taking our ownbreaks for ourselves, that's
such a good example for our kids.
How do we teach, how do we helpour gifted and sensitive kids
protect their own energy andnavigate overwhelm in their
(05:20):
lives?
They overwhelm in their lives.
Kanika Vasudeva (05:24):
Yeah.
So I think that's the firststep, where that's we do it,
like they notice that we aredoing this.
Then I usually like to walk thekids with a little bit
meditation as well, like usuallyif we are raising such kids.
We have got lots of tools fromother therapists, their other
techniques that we've learnedourselves.
(05:45):
My favorite one is grounding,where I really teach my son also
to ground, which is justimagining that where you're
sitting, you just imagine thatyour legs get longer and longer
and they go right into thecenter of the earth and you can
make it funny because you knowyou can make it interesting for
(06:06):
them.
It doesn't have to be serious.
So I just say oh well, you'vegot a monkey tail.
There's a monkey tail and thatgoes from your back.
It's going all the way to thecenter of the earth and now I'm
imagining these colors flowingdown.
Just play, play with theirimagination, whatever works with
them, but teach them how to letgo of stress.
So sometimes it could beletting colors flow through them
(06:29):
.
It could be.
Well, you've got lots of stones, you know, let's throw this
person away.
This person said something,let's just throw that into the
ground.
We don't like that.
So just using imagery that theylike and helping them throw
that stuff away, because you'regiving them agency.
Well, we don't like this.
Whatever that heaviness is, um,let's say wherever they felt
(06:51):
that they couldn't do something,sometimes even the stress of
that.
Well, it's so difficult.
Why don't we take all thedifficulty and just throw it
away and, um, so that's howyou're helping them ground.
Now, grounding is a beautifultechnique, you know.
Yes, it's a meditationtechnique, but the science
(07:12):
behind grounding is that it'slike a conductor that really
helps us, an electric conductorthat really helps us release our
negative charges.
An electric conductor thatreally helps us release our
negative charges.
You know, all the electricalappliances that we have in our
houses, like a toaster, like aniron, even like the fridge, like
(07:32):
all the electrical appliances,they have an earthing wire.
The reason they have theearthing wire is because that is
meant to connect to the earthif there's any fault.
So the excess negative chargegoes into the earth.
So when you're teaching a child, or when we are doing this
ourselves, and when we aregrounding, we are walking
(07:55):
ungrounded.
Really, we're walking like withno discharge for our negative
feelings, like whateverheaviness we feel over.
That's all there, right?
So when we ground, when westart teaching them that we help
them with this.
And so once you help themground, a lot of the times I
find that that starts shifting,like the body starts easing into
(08:16):
it.
Work with your child in terms ofwhat really works for them,
right, your child might be verysensory so you can tell them ah,
you know.
So now your shoulders aredropping or it feels soft, it
feels like whatever they areused to.
Bring those senses into them.
If they like smells.
(08:36):
Well, this is how it feels like.
Well, let's see, you canimagine things that they would
see.
This is how it feels like.
But bring those senses to themthat they would see.
This is how it feels like, butbring those senses to them
whatever they would like.
If they're very much into, let'ssay, unicorns, you can bring
those unicorns in, because oncewe've discharged, we want to
fill the space and we want tofill it with something that they
(08:59):
would find interesting.
So I always connect them to thesun.
We always imagine the sunlightpouring with gold sparkles
coming in, and you can bring inthat.
Well, you know, what do we wantthe sun to bring for us?
Oh, let's bring us someadventure.
You know we would like to playwith cars, like my son loves
cars, loves anything but speed,and so on.
But bring that imagery in.
(09:20):
If it's nighttime, you couldtell them well, now there's some
unicorn coming in or there'sfairies who want to come and who
want to sleep with you.
What would you like to dreamabout?
But do it per the day, do itper what your child really likes
.
But bring these two elements,bring the earth, bring the sun
(09:41):
and just let them do the workfor you.
Bring imagery and bring storyinto it, so that they're
meditating without even knowingit.
But it will really help themrelax because you have given
them a space to ground, let goof the heaviness that they're
feeling, and then you'rebringing in, filling in with the
vibration that they would liketo have.
Carrie Lingenfelter (10:02):
Yes, we love to do that every night at
bedtime.
It's great, I love that and Ilove the way that you're
describing grounding.
I think is wonderful to defineit in that way and we can do
that for our kids.
I love what you're saying.
We can bring it to their thechildren's level, so it's
wonderful.
Kanika Vasudeva (10:22):
Okay, not making making it complicated,
like just working with them.
In fact, I think this is whatwe can learn as parents.
Often we are more serious kidshave a lot more fun and play to
them yes, yes, bringing it intotheir world and whatever they're
into.
Carrie Lingenfelter (10:37):
My son was into orcas for a long time, so I
would do meditations with orcas, like, like you're saying,
you're bringing in whateverspirit animal they're drawn to
at the time, whatever's in theiruniverse right now that they're
connected to, I love that.
Okay, so, as I'm thinking aboutenergy in my house, I've been
(10:57):
talking about this a lot with myfamily, so it's really
interesting.
You and I were actuallyspeaking about names before I
hit record today and we weretalking about how it's
interesting because our parentsare choosing our names for us,
right?
And it was interesting becausewhen I was pregnant, I was
telling you, when I was pregnantwith my kids, I went to a
psychic or a medium and I askeddo my kids like these names?
(11:23):
And it was really interestingbecause they were like, yes,
they love this name and this isa name that they probably won't
ever change to like a moreformal version, cause I have
little nicknames for my kidswhile they're little and they
said my son will probably keephis nickname his whole time.
Well, that's really cool, but Iam not sure my name has a
meaning.
That's connected to my father'sside of the family and I never
(11:50):
really took to that connection.
So when we give a name, it'sinteresting and I was very
thoughtful when I named mydaughter.
She has the same middle name asme and I thought is it okay to
do this?
Because then I'm bringing inpieces of myself to her, but I
want her to be her own.
What are your thoughts on names?
And then also like generalgenerational emotional patterns
(12:12):
that can pass down to or how wecan work on those?
That's two separate questions,but you can choose where you
want to start no, no, I lovethat.
Kanika Vasudeva (12:20):
I love that.
I think it's a beautiful thingand, like we were talking about
that as well, I have a moonmeditation class that I did some
time ago and that one was onowning your name, and all the
participants in my class none ofthem really liked their name
fully Wow, I believe that a lotof us on this planet, too, sort
(12:44):
of have our names, but there'ssomething that we don't like
about it and that could bedifferent things.
It may or may not even be thesurname.
Usually, even as a first namelike, if I give my example right
my name is Kanika.
It comes from the Hindi wordkanak.
Kanak is a small wheat grain,like one grain of wheat in Hindi
(13:07):
, and that wheat grain.
That name was given becausewheat is like the staple diet in
North India and that's like thegold, so to speak, because when
you have wheat you have enoughto feed and so on, and so it was
that small grain that I wasnamed after.
So my name literally is a smallpart of something big, and I
(13:28):
hated that you're the tiny partthat's hard, that's hard to take
in when you're a kid.
Yeah, you want to expand thetiny part of something big, and
I'm like what the what does thatmean?
Right, like you know like, giveme a name.
Carrie Lingenfelter (13:52):
It just means so small when you're
wanting to expand, right.
So many children are wanting toexpand into their own and grow.
Yeah yeah.
Kanika Vasudeva (14:03):
So when I looked at my name and it's a
common name, by the way likenothing against, you know my
parents who named me I don'tthink that they were thinking
like that Very opposite, butthis is what I was taking away,
and I did not like feeling smallat all.
As I've grown up, though, I'vestarted understanding that the
(14:25):
name also means I'm a small partof something big, means I'm
creating something big.
It means that, yes, it startswith a very small, humble
beginning, but there are bigshifts happening, and I love
that, because the work that I'mdoing I really want to expand
out more and more, touch as manypeople as I can.
So I'm so happy to be a ripple,to cause that ripple effect,
(14:49):
like just that little smallstone that causes those ripples.
I just love that now.
But it's taken me time to growinto it, and what's really
shifted in between is, I guess,understanding.
Um, also, I suppose you knowwhen I say ego, it was more how
(15:09):
I wanted to feel.
How should I explain that?
How I wanted to feel like I amimportant, and it's taken
understanding my importance witha lot more fullness.
It's not that I am notimportant, but it is that we all
have this vast consciousnessaround us and we're all little
(15:32):
threads connecting into thatsame thing.
You know that piece of oneness.
So we are all like a littlepart of that.
And one analogy that I lovethere is that if I am the human
and I just imagine myself and Iimagine myself on this big,
massive earth, so I'm like justreally tiny in comparison with
the earth.
If I extrapolate that and startdoing that for the solar system
(15:54):
, for the universe, like I'mreally really tiny, it's okay.
But it's taken time tounderstand that perspective.
I do think that whoever names usnames us in some sense because
there is something that they'vetuned into, there's some purpose
, there's some bigger thing thatthey're bringing on there.
(16:15):
What we do need to do is wejust need to get okay, first of
all, with that name, or even ifyou're wanting to rename
ourselves at some point in time,we need to think, like you know
, I guess you were very smart.
You looked at your kids and youasked their spirits what is the
name you want to have?
And then choose something ofyour liking, like otherwise,
(16:36):
just changing a name is notchanging things for you, the
people who go and add someletters to it or change the name
, but you need to like it.
You need to know the essenceand whatever that is and do that
um.
So that's one thing that if youwant to change your name, by
all means okay, but but gethappy, accept your new name
(17:00):
first, really resonate with thatenergy, know what you're going
for and then do that.
You'll find it a lot easier.
There's also karma that we cancarry from our lineages.
Whatever side we get that from,I usually find that every soul
comes in from you.
Know, soul wise.
They're either coming in fromtheir dad's side or from their
(17:21):
mom's side, in terms of theancient um.
Well, both mom and dad.
So when we're all born, we'retaking earth energy, we're
taking energy as a soul toincarnate, we take for the body
energy.
We're also taking a part of ourmom or a part of our dad, both.
But there's usually one sidethat's going to be stronger,
(17:43):
this one side which says well,you know you should be born here
because we want to have theshift in our um line, so to
speak.
This is what you want to bringin.
So they're, they're reallyrooting, they want us there.
Both of these lines willusually have one leader, one
senior person, so to speak,who's handling, sort of like the
(18:03):
torchbearer, you know, carryingthat part.
So we carry that, and usuallythe souls will come from one
side, which is why it doesn'tmatter how you are physically
close to one parent or so on.
But you would find that when youare dreaming, like there's one
part of the family which sort ofcomes more in your dreams again
(18:25):
and again that could be withyour name as well that there's
one place that you're bringingthat from, especially if you
have that, then there is thosegenerational patterns that you
also need to work with you.
Um, I've had these two, uh, twosides.
Like I know, sometimes peoplejust hate their ancestors.
(18:46):
They're like, you know, they'rejust giving me, like my family
had to go through, let's say,some wars, or they have a lot of
survival stuff in them.
I guess a lot of our familieswould have those survival things
, because that's how humans haveevolved to this stage, right,
and there's a viewpoint wherepeople are like, well, I don't
want to have, like I just wantto be as away from my ancestors
(19:08):
as possible so that they cannotcome into my energy at all.
But what I really find is that,well, you're trying to sort of
push away part of yourself.
When you're trying to reallynot just push them away and
we've also got energy from them,we really come from them.
You're almost, um, like this ishow you were born, this is how
(19:33):
you come.
I often find, on the other hand, like when you start working
with that, you start workingwith those scars, you start
healing that there's a lot ofthe ancestral gifts, blessings,
that start coming through andonce you become conscious, it's
not super hard to clean theancestral bits that that made
(19:56):
you.
But once you've cleaned that,there's just so much power boost
that you get from that becauseyou tap into a lot more.
Um, you tap into the gifts, youtap into the healing.
You've also brought themforward, so you get their
blessings as well okay, wow,that's interesting to think
about the blessings too.
Carrie Lingenfelter (20:14):
Yeah, because I think we always talk
about the trauma piece, but whatare the gifts or the blessings
that come with it too?
Kanika Vasudeva (20:21):
so that's interesting because you know we
have our own blessings, like asas a soul, with the life that
we've incarnated.
There might be lies whereyou've done some similar work
before you've been a priestess,or you've had some spiritual
gifts, or you've led big placesand so on.
But imagine if you could alsotap into the ancestral gifts
(20:42):
that you had.
Then life becomes a lot easier.
It's always good to have thisbig team with you.
The bigger the better.
Right, so you could fight themand you could go.
Okay, I don't want to see themat all, but hang on, they've
also helped you come into theworld.
So if you could just do thatlittle work because often for
(21:02):
them they're just waiting thatthere's certain things that they
wanted to learn and that's whythey've got you, because they
wanted you to be here so thatthey could see an example.
They actually want to supportyou, but they're just feeling
hurt somewhere.
They just need that hurt to betended to.
Once you can do that, then youcan start tapping into their
gifts as well.
Like some of your ancestorsmight be very good with money,
(21:23):
some of your ancestors mighthave very ancient plant wisdom
that you will suddenly startunlocking.
Some of them might be very goodwith animals, you know, and
you'll start feeling like thosedownloads start coming into you
just because you've healed thatpart and now you have access to
that pool of knowledge.
Carrie Lingenfelter (21:42):
Wow, that's beautiful.
I love that.
I'm thinking in my minds, aswe're talking, about the idea of
them bringing in the spiritinto this life.
What are your thoughts on thekids being born today that are
coming either, so connected?
(22:03):
Sometimes they have labels.
In the US we like to label thema lot with, you know,
neurodiverse labels.
What are your thoughts on this?
Kanika Vasudeva (22:13):
that's going on , yeah yeah, thanks for asking
the question as well, because Ithink it would really help a lot
of the parents too as well,because I think it would really
help a lot of the parents toparents of sensitive kids,
parents of kids with any sort ofspecial needs.
(22:34):
Um, so, you know, in our liveson on earth, we all will gather
karma and karma.
So before I go into thisquestion, I really need to talk
about karma.
So karma and that explanationmight be a little bit different
(22:55):
to what you've been taughtbefore, what you've learned
before, so just bear with mewhile I'm sharing this.
So karma to me is a lot aroundlearning.
It's not around, like you, titfor tat.
It's not like one personmurdered someone in one lifetime
, so then this lifetime theyshould get murdered.
Because if that was the case,if this, if just absolute, that
(23:16):
equality was the case, then youknow the murdering would never
stop.
Because one person's murdered,then you know they, then someone
else has to murder them andlife on earth would not evolve,
right?
So in my opinion, karma is morethis concept, so that we all
(23:39):
understand we all evolve ashuman beings.
Um, the other thing we wouldhear is oh, earth is on the 3d
dimension.
Right now we want to go to 5d,which is more harmonious, which
is more connected.
So we have this concept ofkarma.
Now, um, how does karma reallyhappen?
Like, when do I get the badpoints?
When do I get the right points?
(24:01):
For the soul, there's nothingis good or bad, but again, I
still need to learn.
Let's say, I've taken somethingfrom someone, I've snatched a
lot of money from someone.
I need to be, you know,learning how to not do that and
how to have more harmony.
I need to see the effects of it, right.
So it's all based on when was Iable to make those decisions?
When was I able to make thosedecisions?
(24:23):
When was I able to understandthat this is what I'm doing?
And then this is the output ofthat.
So, so to say, like you know,like, let's say, if a kid is two
years old and the two year oldis, like you know, maybe
sometimes even pulling theirmom's hair or so on, you know,
would you give that child karmafor that?
Like you know their mom's hair,or so on, you know, would you
(24:44):
give that child karma for that?
Like you know, that childdoesn't know, like it's just a
normal, they're just growing upright.
So the karmic points, or how itworks, is in the sense of, well,
when you understanding what isreally happening and then how
(25:04):
are you doing things correct?
So now, if we look at thesekids and we look at, well,
what's happening for them, ifyou, it's actually a far more
easier experience for the soulbecause there are these lives
where they can come in, you know, a life where they can actually
(25:26):
understand for a lot more, theycan do things for a lot more,
but it's more or less.
They don't get the bad karmapoints because they're taking
longer to understand, becausethey don't have that agency.
The truth is that there is alot of competition for bodies,
for souls, to incarnate on earth.
(25:47):
There's a lot of competition.
There's higher competition forbodies that are going to be
handicapped or so-called specialand so on, because when the
souls incarnate in those, justbecause a anyways, because life
is going to be hard, you'regoing to work out a lot of karma
.
You're going to learn a lot ofthings too.
You're not karmically, you'renot going to have as many bad
(26:11):
points anyway, whereas you getto clean a lot of the karma.
So a lot of times when souls areincarnating in this.
They tend to be the karmicsouls, like there is a lot that
they want to work through andthen there's a lot that they're
carrying with them, andtypically their caregivers will
also have some sort of thing tolearn from them.
(26:31):
But it's not like, hey,everything is just karmic and
everything is like you know, nowyou're just doomed because this
is this life.
It's not that you're learningin the process as well.
There's a lot that these kids,special kids, are teaching us.
Sometimes we need to slow down,we need to have the patience we
need.
They teach us so muchunconditional love.
There's so much tapped intoconsciousness.
(26:54):
They're actually teaching usall of those things like just
being connected to theconsciousness.
I guess a lot of us become themore conscious parents, awakened
parents because of our kids,because they force us to see
that.
Oh yeah, they force us to seethat, whereas otherwise we could
(27:16):
have continued the same ratrace.
So it's like a win-win on bothsides and often, as we're
working out all of that, as weare learning, you know, the kids
shape up as well.
The parents.
Their lives have been changed,but it's a much faster growth in
terms of evolution.
Carrie Lingenfelter (27:34):
Yeah, wow, yeah.
That's a lot to think about andI don't know when you're
raising these kids.
I don't know how you do itwithout becoming conscious,
because I feel like the more ifyou turn away from the conscious
pieces, if you turn away andyou try to continue down that
same path, the louder and moreresistant the kids become.
Kanika Vasudeva (27:55):
Oh yeah.
From my experience that too, andI think just the whole system
is.
So you know, like it puts youdown so much.
Like when you have kids likethat, whatever you go to the
therapist, you go to the schoolyou go to, so on, like you just
never get good news.
It's just one thing after theother, after the other, the
other, and you're like, okay, Iget it, but like you know,
(28:17):
somebody tell me likesomething's better here,
something's going to be okay,that I'm doing fine.
So it's almost like we hit intothat wall and it's just such a
different journey.
I guess even a lot parentgroups, everybody has their own
journey with their kid and oftenthere's still a sense of
(28:38):
isolation, because what you'reexperiencing with your child in
your family dynamic, that can bevery different to what other
parents are feeling, maybe alittle bit similar, but it can
be a lot more different.
So we have to tune in to otherthings, we have to ask for help.
But I think that is thebeautiful thing, that is the
beauty.
(28:58):
These kids are the ones asthey're so special because
they're going to show us so muchlight.
I often think of other dyslexickids or other special kids in
the world.
You know, um, like steve jobs.
Thank god he was dyslexic.
Thank God for that, because ifhe wasn't, our world would be so
(29:19):
different.
And yet, when he was growing up, I'm sure his parents were told
all the time that there was aproblem with him and he doesn't
know how to write and how thatis so problematic, and so on.
You look at the world'sgeniuses and look at how, when
they were growing up, they weresomehow out of character.
(29:41):
But it's out of characterbecause they don't fit into the
mold that we understand on earth.
It's a very simple 3d plane ingeneral.
You know we have a few labelslike this is normal.
You're outside it.
We don't really understand whatto do with you.
So we will give you a speciallabel and we will say that you
know there's something lackingwith you, because I cannot
(30:03):
understand what you've got tooffer really you know it's.
Carrie Lingenfelter (30:09):
It's so beautiful to have these messages
for these parents because, likeyou said, when we go to the
therapist and I I used to be aspeech therapist I used to see
how we would list off the painpoints for parents here's where
they're lacking, here's wherethey should be, here's where
they're not.
Here's the other problem.
Let me list 85 problems.
(30:31):
And then the parent walks outwith that piece of paper listing
85 problems about theirprecious, perfect born child
that you know, you're soconnected to.
And it's beautiful that we'renow seeing these spiritual
connections and having that totune into as parents, because it
gives us that hope that we needand it gives us that connection
(30:55):
with ourselves and thatconnection with our kids that we
need in raising these kidsright now.
Kanika Vasudeva (31:01):
Yeah, and here's this message that I've
got to give to all the parentshere that if you've got these
kids, you know the world labelsit, let's say, as a weakness or
labels it in whatever form itwants to, because it does not
understand.
If the whole world was made ofthe same people, we would not
(31:21):
have anyone looking at thingsdifferently like these, the very
points that right now areweaknesses, they're going to be
blessings in some sense.
These kids come to work offsomething really special and the
other way to think of it isthat they hit the ground running
, like they come in charged withwell, this is what I've got to
(31:43):
do.
This is what I've got to learn.
You know, I've got to learnempathy.
I want to understand lackmyself, I want to lack certain
things so that I can reallyunderstand empathy, that I can
really get along and understandwhat is someone else's pain,
like.
Think of the big hearts thatthese kids have.
Think of the resilience thesekids have because they've got to
(32:04):
do a couple of things again andagain, like compared to other
kids who can probably go out,play, like, do the normal things
, and they don't have tostruggle as much.
These kids grow up having a lotof challenges and that makes
them very resilient, that makesthem far more sensitive beyond
what words or teachers couldteach or books could teach.
(32:27):
But they just end up with a lotmore depth and we need that.
We need that to shift the worldinto a space where there's a
lot more unity, where there's alot more harmony.
Also, these kids aretremendously gifted in the sense
that they are more tuned intotheir consciousness.
I guess, as parents, you know,if we could probably not worry
(32:54):
about it too much and we couldjust trust, we could trust in
their fullness more, then we'llstart seeing that they're
actually more amazing.
I used to get really, reallyworried with my son a lot of
times because I would get, likeyou know, this is lacking, this
is lacking, like you said, listsand so on.
(33:14):
Right, I would get a lot ofthat and for a while, every time
I would get that, I would lookat my so-called perfect child
and suddenly he would seem veryimperfect because I would notice
, I would look through the samelabels and go, yep, that is not
like other kids.
No, that's not like other kids.
You know, that is not likeother kids.
(33:35):
No, that's not like other kids,you know, and you do that.
And then what I have actuallydone in that moment is that the
world was seeing him through hislack and I'm also seeing him
through his lack, and so after awhile I said you know what, I'm
not doing this anymore.
Carrie Lingenfelter (33:49):
Put it away .
Yes, put it away, put it in adrawer.
Kanika Vasudeva (33:55):
Yeah, yeah, like I'm not going to do that
torture for him.
I'm not going to do thattorture for him because there's
brilliance that he brings andI'm just going to notice the
brilliance instead.
But it's different once youstart noticing the brilliance
it's really different.
Um, because you start seeingthat, the amazing senses they
(34:16):
have, you start seeing.
If I go back to our birth storyand if I go back to you know we
all came from our mother's lineor our father's line, like the
line that really wanted us togrow and evolve and develop.
We were chosen.
Every single one of us waschosen both sides.
As we chose our parents, wechose the body where we will
(34:37):
come, in the same way that wewere also chosen on the other
side, like our lineages chose usas well, and they knew very
well what we're going to be, howwe are going to be, what we're
going to be supposedly lackingin or what things we'll have.
But they wanted to bring thatbecause they wanted the lineage
to understand.
(34:57):
So each of us is chosen to healour lineages, like it's really
every single one of us,including our kids, is a
blessing.
So when we see them as anythingless we are, they're not seeing
the full picture.
If they're seeing the odd oneout, we needed that odd one out,
and what you need to to askinstead is what is my child
(35:18):
bringing for me?
What?
Why did I?
Why do I have this?
And especially wherever youfeel like really the big lack,
like you feel like, oh, mychild's not, you know, getting
this, my child's perhaps notable to do academics really well
, or my child's not able to sitdown really well.
I want you to start thinkingwhat part of you really wants
(35:39):
that as in.
Is it your ego part?
Do you want to be like the coolparent who has got the perfect
child?
What part is it that's wantingthat like?
Heal that within yourself.
Yes, why are you wanting that?
You know, like, reallyunderstand that.
Um, is there some part of youthat wants to feel you know,
(36:00):
seen, understood because you fitin with everyone?
Are you fighting that?
What is it?
Accept that bit.
You'll already start seeing thethings shift.
It's not even your child.
The first step is you.
You'll start feeling the shiftwhen you start healing yourself.
Then look at your child andthen go okay, why?
And a lot of our, these parents, would be very intuitive as
(36:22):
well.
So start tuning into why isyour child this way?
Why is he or she?
Why do they have this challengefrom a learning perspective?
You know, as a soul, what is itthat they want to learn?
And then understand that alittle bit more.
Once you understand that it'llgive you a lot more peace,
(36:43):
because for my son, for example,I understood that he just
wanted to experience good amountof lack so that he could be a
lot more empathetic.
He wants funny enough like hehad a speech delay and whenever
I look at him he's always givinga big speech like to a big
audience, which you know, if Iwas to look at it I would go
(37:05):
like my bet would not be on thatside ever.
Yeah, just because of how I'mseeing him grow up in the
physical world.
Right, but he wants to do that.
He really wants to touch asmany people as he can, but in a
very sensitive way, likeunderstanding everyone and
really speaking to their hearts.
And to be able to do that heneeds to understand the lack, he
(37:28):
needs to feel that himself sothat he's really able to serve
his purpose as best as he can.
Once you start doing that, onceyou get that picture, a lot of
the stress, worry that we cancarry as parents that gets
dissolved.
Carrie Lingenfelter (37:45):
It's so spot on.
Thank you so much for sharingthe story of what you're seeing
and visualizing for your son.
I think it's so magical tothink about the shift that he is
possibly going through andgoing to evolve into in this
life.
And you know, it's interestingwhat you were talking about
reflecting back on ourselves asparents.
(38:06):
My husband and I recently werereflecting.
Our son is turning 10 and wefeel like he has this piece of
trying to be perfect to fit in,because he's very sensitive and
very aware of everybody else'senergy and everybody else's
ideas of him.
And we were my husband and Inoticed we were watching a video
(38:28):
of when our son and we werewatching with both of our kids
we like to watch these littleyear-long movies that we call
them from different eras and wewere watching when he was little
and he was so fun andvibratious and just being his
own spirit when he was fouryears old and my daughter said,
buddy, like why?
(38:49):
How come you don't act likethat, like you're?
You don't live like that asmuch now?
You were so much fun before,you cared about being cool.
And it was really interestingbecause my husband and I excuse
me we were wondering why did hedo that?
Why did he shift?
Why did he try to be likeeverybody else and not be
himself when, at the same exactweekend, the same exact time, my
(39:13):
husband and I are also goingthrough our own shifts of not
caring what people around usthink about our family, about
our parenting, about ourspirituality, about being who we
truly are?
So it's so interesting to watchmy husband and I breaking free
of society's box of expectations, of neurotypical box of
(39:37):
expectations of how we'resupposed to work in a family or
in society.
So we're watching this shift inourselves and then we're also
encouraging our son to behimself and talking about true
friendship, what true friendshiplooks like, and accepting
people for who they are.
Kanika Vasudeva (39:54):
I'm so glad and so thankful that you shared
this because this will resonatewith a lot of parents and
particularly when we are on thisjourney spiritual journey or
awakening journey we'll oftenfind that these paths mirror,
because the world is a mirror.
Our kids will reflect what weare going through, so a lot of
(40:17):
what you want to teach to themactually evolve and do that
yourself and talk as much aspossible with your kids.
Oftentimes, I think also if wecan hold space for them where
they can come out and they cantalk as much yeah that is the
time when you know they can bereally open and they can
(40:37):
actually help us see the woundsexactly where we need to heal.
But it's so spot on these kids.
They're such a blessing becausethey come to heal us in so many
ways.
Carrie Lingenfelter (40:49):
Yeah, it's so much there.
They are our biggest teachers.
Yeah, in so many ways sobeautiful.
Thank you so much, Kanika, forhaving this amazing spiritual
parenting chat today.
I really appreciate yourconnection today and I love the
work you're doing.
I love your podcast.
(41:10):
I've been listening this week.
I think you're sharingbeautiful messages with parents.
How can our listeners find you?
Kanika Vasudeva (41:18):
Thanks a lot, carrie.
This has been absolutelyamazing.
We cover such good topics.
It's really been fun.
I can be found at Kaneka EnergyCoach on Instagram, on LinkedIn
and YouTube as well, so that'smy favorite place.
Come ask me questions and Ihave a freebie as well for
parents who might be wonderingaround their parenting contracts
(41:41):
or their karma with their kids.
So that can be found atartoflifecentercom slash parent.
So this is a three-part audioseries and I tell the parents
about their karmic contracts,about their soul contracts with
their kids, and we also get toheal it as well.
(42:02):
Each of the audio is about 10minutes.
It's not too much, but I'mgetting some amazing feedback
with that one.
Carrie Lingenfelter (42:10):
Oh my gosh, I can't wait to check that one
out myself, and we'll includethose in the show notes for
everyone.
I would love to share that.
That's myself, and we'llinclude those in the show notes
for everyone.
I would love to share that.
That's beautiful and what's thename of your podcast?
Again for our listeners.
Kanika Vasudeva (42:22):
So the name of my podcast is Art of Life
Podcast.
I've actually got two podcasts.
One of them is an Art of LifePodcast, where I have guests and
where I do my own talks as wellaround parenting, around
transformation, etc.
Then there's another podcast Ihave which is art of life guided
meditations, and there'ssmaller meditations that I do
(42:45):
for parents but also for otheraudiences, and it's got some
cool meditations, like.
It's got meditations when youare really stressed out, you
cannot sleep.
It's got more spiritualmeditations as well, like if you
feel you've got a spiritualattack.
It's got some meditations toheal the wounds with your mother
, your father as well.
(43:07):
So, yeah, so that's like myyeah, I think that's my special
place that I would just wanteveryone to have access to these
tools where they can releasestress, they can feel better in
the moment, and that's myservice to the world.
Carrie Lingenfelter (43:25):
Beautiful, oh my goodness.
I'm excited to share that withour listeners.
I know so many parents alwayslooking for more guided
meditations and healing guidedmeditations.
That's just two in one.
Thank you so much, kanika, forsharing all of this with us.
Kanika Vasudeva (43:39):
Thank you so much, Keri.
It's been amazing to be on theshow.
Carrie Lingenfelter (43:44):
Well, that's a wrap.
Thanks so much for tuning in.
Changemakers.
This is Keri, and if youhaven't done a review for us
five stars and a little fewwords about what you've enjoyed
in our podcast episodes, wewould really appreciate it.
If you guys would like to evermessage me, I would love any
questions you have or anyfeedback.
At info at heart to heartlifecom, we also have a brand
(44:08):
new website which we're superexcited to share.
It's heart to heart lifecom.
Thanks so much for tuning inand happy life.
Happy times.
Change maker families.
Bye.
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