August 3, 2025 • 54 mins
The episode begins with a humorous introduction by the hosts of the podcast 'Squirrels After Dark.' They discuss various anecdotes, including neighbors' mishaps, interactions with pets, and humorous personal stories. The recording is filled with interruptions, playful banter, and notable shout-outs. Highlights include shout-outs to missing crew members, the experience of being selected as a safe neighbor by a child, humorous misadventures with Uber rides, and a funny incident involving misused sanitizer. The episode also contains tributes and birthday acknowledgments, making it an eclectic mix of humor, personal stories, and heartfelt moments.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Well, This is why we're not puppies like you.
Some of us don't need the snouts.
They'll be very nice. And on that note, hello
everyone, welcome to Squirrels After Dark After Hours
Uncensored Season 3 Episode 15. An interesting crew with us
(00:27):
today. We are missing a couple, but we
are all here. First of all, I would like to
say this episode is recorded on the traditional and unseated
territories of the Coquitlam First Nations.
Thank you for allowing us to be here.
With that said, let's get to theintros.
Wait, no, no intros, Not yet. Shout out to those who are not
(00:51):
here. T-bone unfortunately was not
able to make it today due to unforeseen circumstances.
Smile down. Sorry.
Posing for. A photo.
Hobbies, taking pictures, There you go.
Shout out to Sprinkles, Silent Peter and the kids.
(01:13):
They weren't. They actually have quite a few
concert plans, so they may not be back until mid to late August
I believe. But we do.
We do miss them immensely and love them lots.
On that note, having fun intros to the people who are here,
smile. Jeez.
(01:37):
Thank you. OK, so we have the fluffy and
cuddly Otter pup Titan J Rod Rare.
There he is. We have my sexy husband 2 point
(01:57):
O spider pup I'd like to introduce the world to the new
hood 2 point O spider pup Rick Hunter the the the Top Chef
executive who has not cut her finger off in the last two weeks
(02:19):
Jukey. Got another bruise?
Didn't say anything about bruises.
That's normal. That's that's understandable.
Returning guest from previous episode.
Welcome back, Skyler. Greetings.
Hello and a newbie for the firsttime ever to the chaos that is
our show Danigan. Hi.
(02:42):
Welcome. Thank you.
Good puppy and. That's how after.
Dark happens at 5:30 in the afternoon and it's still light
out. It's dark somewhere, thought.
I'd put that. In there I mean when it's.
Summer. Just dim the lights, we're fine.
It's. Yeah, in the winter it's dark
out. Yeah, well, I mean, we're by the
(03:03):
time the episode's uploaded, it's after dark, so OK, we'll go
with that. All right, so just an FYI, this
episode is recorded on the 27th of July.
It will be uploaded on ish around Vancouver Pride parade
today which is August 3rd, so itmay or may not be at
(03:26):
automatically uploaded. OK.
You just say thank goodness for scheduled uploading, I don't
have to worry about it. OK, so you all will hear this
while we are out enjoying Vancouver Pride.
The parade which will include mywell earned pickup truck Hitch,
(03:48):
who will be temporarily named Spot.
Yeah. I'm actually, I've actually
designed and we are going to create a temporary license plate
for my truck that will say spot just for the parade.
I love that. That's amazing.
The the the last part of the entire podcast might be missing
(04:10):
because I just realized that I didn't actually turn up my
volume recording. So I think probably about 70% of
everything I said the last episode would not be recorded.
We'll see, silly. It's always something with you.
I'm literally looking and I'm like, I turned that down when I
went to grab something. So I have a feeling that we've.
(04:34):
We want solutions, not problems.So, well, that's.
OK, well, if you're just hearinghim now, this.
Is welcome back. Spider pup Rick Hunter.
Hello. Oh, snap.
That would be an issue. Did you?
Just cancel the recording now. No, I'm not.
Canceling the recording. I'm just checking.
Keep going, talking, stop. Messing with the screens.
I'm not watching, I'm watching. Yes.
(04:55):
That seemed that seemed appropriate, right?
Yeah. That sounds like it was.
It needed, yeah. Well, that might be a screw up.
Well, you guys are all recorded.You they've heard people have
heard my voices enough. That's fine as long.
As you sound like it's good. As long as you're all recorded,
who cares? I just most of talking it's OK
exactly. As long as it's recorded though,
right? No where your voices will be
(05:17):
recorded no if if you look up and see what happened here is
when I do this and it no longer actually.
The green dots are going away. Yeah, I I don't have a voice.
I have to actually my input intothe system was down.
Again, I'm color blind so I don't see green.
OK, see the dots? What colors do they see?
(05:39):
Let's just simplify this for J Rod.
The episode was recorded, Rick wasn't.
Whatever. Whatever color you do see those
bars, they're not there. Yeah, all right.
So I might not be in. I might be like a ghost.
They'll hear my echo through your microphones, maybe.
Oops. Sorry people.
Like I said, they've heard my voice enough.
(06:00):
They'll survive. You're all in the episode.
We're all only. 50% of the episodes that I have been part
of have been successful. I've only been on 2.
That's what I get for leaving the Table 3.
Yeah, yes. This is your 4th.
Technically speaking, so yes. So 25% I don't.
Know if this one's successful yet or not?
(06:22):
And given that he only just camein part way through, this one
also isn't entirely successful, is it?
When when did I get up to go fora glass of wine?
Midway No. Break.
Three quarters, 3/4 I didn't do the full thing.
Whenever I went up like I left the table to go over, I turned
the microphone down so I didn't record making a sound.
I. Don't even remember you leaving
during the. Recording wow this episode.
(06:43):
Thanks a lot. I do remember.
Him leaving I was. Paying.
I remember him playing the Weegee Speaks.
Thank you, Juki. You were mostly asking
questions, so it's just us talking to nobody.
Answering questions from the. Yeah, just just answering random
question, just telling random stories unprompted as we do.
Explain why the AI was so drunk.Touché.
Oh, that could explain. A lot that actually could
(07:07):
explain why the AI oh that mightthat's.
Possible. That might totally make sense
because the conversation would be smart.
One sided? Oh, that totally.
Makes sense why it was so weird.We're just telling random
stories unprompted because the prompt wasn't being heard
because you were recording. That totally makes sense.
(07:32):
That is funny. So we're all just bragging about
things that we did, Yeah. OK.
Yeah. Cool, I mean Spider was there in
spirit. He wasn't.
No, apparently not. No, no, no, He was there in
spirit. He just wasn't there in mind.
There was no evidence of that orvoice.
Wow, YouTube saw it. OK, fair enough.
(07:52):
Yeah, yeah. So he was there, just inside
empty, empty headed puppy. I really need to pay attention
to make sure that I actually have, you know?
Puppy, you're always concerned about checking everybody else
because you'd never leave the table mid recording.
I know I. Think that's only the second.
Well, I generally always have my, you know, booze here ahead.
(08:14):
It was just, you know, randomly I needed to go something else.
Anyway, so also on premises today, we do have Spaz, who is,
I believe, sleeping in his towerat the moment.
At least that's where I saw him last.
Yeah. I see so.
Outside, we've got scamp and art, art, art.
(08:37):
Arctic J Fox More. Puppies.
The brain wasn't raining it. Happens.
More puppies. Burke.
Excuse me? Burke Rare.
There you go. Get it in there.
Like a good roar. Isn't everybody loves his roar.
Yeah, I know. Right it.
(08:58):
Makes me think of Shrek do the Roar.
It's very like ASMR, rare see. It is.
He does very well. Yeah.
He's the only one that can do it.
Everyone loves it. So yeah, every.
That's his thing. What?
I don't even remember how we started that.
We were talking about that juristic Barack Juris.
(09:22):
Yeah, that that meme that was going out just like the
deanosaurs that say the rower red.
Oh my God, I don't. Remember that at all.
I don't remember that, I just. More of these backups.
Apparently you were drinking stronger ciders.
Possibly, and I'm down to the 4 1/2%, you know, Cheers for.
That well. I.
Drink wine, it's tasty Berry. It's tasty, yeah.
(09:45):
BlackBerry and you'll get pregnant.
I just see it's fine. Murray on my side, and Murray
is. So I'll say if it may take a
second we for my upcoming birthday we have a new game.
Drinking game, of course. I will not participate.
I'm out not doing it. I'm scared, forget it.
I will cuz I'm not gonna take everything so literally.
(10:06):
Exactly. So we, we, we played this game
and this game was donated by ourgood friend Brandon or Dusty
from the The Horseman on the Island for my birthday.
Just for the record, the actual title is The Horseman and My
Little Pony. Yes, that's the name of our
group. We can't leave out Pony, no.
(10:27):
Cuz the horseman sounds ominous.Right now this, but then you
throw in My Little Pony. And it's it's fun again.
Yeah, it's yeah, yeah. So the name is the game is
called Buzz and Jay Rod. Yes, you have.
I'm no 95% sure I've played thisgame before.
It's fun and. You'll play it again.
Oh yes, whoa, I don't. Know about that?
(10:50):
Oh, you're talking about buzzed.I thought you were talking
about. Fear Pong?
No, I don't have Fear Pong yet. Yeah, that Fear Pong will be
coming. OK, that's that's what it was.
That's the one I've played Buzz before.
I'm. Scared no.
So this is the just a few cards.Bottom line, make sure you wear
clean underwear. That's drinkopoly.
(11:13):
Doesn't matter. That's this game, too.
Apparently so. One of the cards.
Could we? Not wear clean underwear.
I know not a step one wear underwear just.
Well, that. Too.
Good point. What was a good point I missed?
It step one, wear underwear. Or not.
I don't make it to step one because.
Buddy buddy. Last time we played Drinkopoly
he was wearing mesh underwear. Yes.
(11:35):
He does that. I saw everything.
Absolutely. He also does that.
Yes, I usually wait until I leave though.
Yeah, there's a rule. There's a rule.
Normally we wait for the normal human sleeve before it becomes
that. Sorry.
Not that I'm a normal human, butyou know.
Buzz Drink. You're definitely a Gray area.
Human. She's still a female who is
(11:56):
straight, yes. Yes, so she enjoys penises.
I do. He has one.
Her husband's, yeah. Well, she's got to touch it.
Oh, it's visible. Yes, yes.
There you go anyway. Drink if you would be open to
being in a threesome. You know what?
Make it 3 drinks. 3 drinks. Jeez, there they go.
(12:16):
So we're not playing now. We're not.
Playing now, I was contemplating.
Just practicing. Buzzed If there's something
bubbly in your drink or sorry ifthere's something bubbly in your
cup, drink. These are just some of the fun.
Well, would that not be all drinks because beer is
carbonated? No bubbles, no bubbles.
Yeah. Hard alcohol, no bubbles, no
(12:37):
bubbles. Depending.
On your, not. See This is why I don't see it
with fruit juice. That's why I don't drink wine
and hard alcohol, because I likethe bubbles.
So, I mean, you can bubble up those two things too.
It's called champagne and right.Orange.
Juice. So yeah, mimosive drink if your
mom or dad has a phone case witha flap that looks drink if your
(12:57):
mom or dad has a phone case witha flap that covers the phone
like a book. Yeah, you know it the same.
OK, just for the record, the keydoes.
I have it. I have the wallet, phone case.
You know, you flip it, open yourcard's on one side, your phone's
on the other side that yeah, youso do it.
(13:18):
You got it. Drink.
If you call him Daddy, drink. Yeah.
Right, Daddy H will be here. Drink.
If you've ever commented on a porn video, what could you
possibly have to say, right? OK, I'm not drinking.
I've never commented. I've never commented on a porn
video. No, if it's bad I just changed
the video. I mean, I've made comments, but
(13:40):
I've never actually posted comments, yeah.
Well, what's the point? Who's seeing them?
Who's reading a porn comment? Exactly which player has the
most unread texts? Player with the most has to take
a drink. Not it.
No, definitely I I cannot stand the little red dot, the little
red notification. Thank you.
I have to. Clear.
(14:01):
Funny we were talking about this.
All players with an Uber rating below 4.7.
Drink and then learn how to be aGod damn more respectful person.
I'd actually have to check my Uber rating.
I don't have Uber. I did mine.
You know what mine is 4.98? Out of five?
Whoa, whoa. Wait OK actually don't call
pineapple cuz I can I can actually check on mine.
(14:23):
I think mine's under 4 because Ithink I've only ever had one man
Uber trip that I booked. Yeah, I've never booked an Uber.
Trip I'm I'm taking a sip just for the sake of sipping.
All right, I'm I'm. I'm actually five stars, right?
I mean, I don't. I don't use it very often, so
that's probably why. I was going to say, I'm like,
I've taken hundreds, including in Vegas.
(14:45):
I got 4.98 so I'm pretty impressed.
Yeah, he also gave those driverslike 5 stars too because the
first guy almost killed us doing127 miles an hour down.
He did not get a five star rating anyways, J Rod, you were
saying? He called.
His mom. According to my account I have a
4.91 rating. Show off.
(15:08):
OK wow, but you have 5 guy? With a 5 star.
How did you? Actually have a five star on
Uber. Yeah, cuz I've used it like 6
times. How did you not give him a five
star rating? I don't know, I'm sure.
He didn't crash. Sure I didn't.
I'm sure I gave him good. Ratings We're not dead. 5 stars.
I'm sure I gave him not. The bar is low, I'm not dead. 5
(15:29):
stars. We got from the Flamingo to
Fremont Street in like 37 seconds.
Oh no, I thought you were. I thought you were talking about
the guy almost killed us coming back from.
No, no, no. I'm.
Talking about times that we almost killed you.
The first time in the Tesla. OK, well, yeah, that was.
A Tesla guy in Vegas, that was super cool.
Yeah. No, he called his mom.
(15:51):
Mine. Sorry, I moved the mic.
OK, he we're not going crazy. OK, so our Uber driver, his mom
is a huge Mark Wahlberg fan and we were actually in the Uber to
go to Fremont Street to go to Mark Wahlberg's.
Tequila. Tequila launch.
Tequila launch and he was he wasthere giving out shots of
(16:12):
tequila on Fremont Street. So we took the Uber down there
of. Course, this was the day before
I arrived. Yeah, so.
Absolutely. It was so amazing.
So anyway, we tell him this, he called his mom on speakerphone
in the car to let her know that we're going down to see Mark
Wahlberg. Did you then pick her up and
bring her with you? Right.
(16:33):
I'm pretty sure she told him to go pick her up.
I imagine she did. I because he, he ended up
walking like he was behind the bar giving out the shots and
everything else. And then he actually came out
into the crowd on Fremont Street.
Spider has, I have pictures of Spider.
He was standing right next to Mark.
I touched Mark like they were walking by and I was taking
(16:55):
pictures and he kind of like gotclose enough where I just kind
of went. Fanboy dope.
That's appropriate. Yes.
Yeah, cuz it was Mark. But we got the Ted Doll signed.
He has the teddy bear from Ted. Signed by Mark Rahlberg up in
the He signed him. That's really cool.
We have a video of him signing it and mosh pitting Ted back
(17:17):
into the crowd. It was.
Yeah, that's really cool. Mark totally yeeded Ted into the
crowd and we got him back, oddlyenough.
It was, I mean, there's. Only 1000 people there.
Hi Spaz. It was.
It was the crew. Though.
It was it was the coolest thing,just the reaction that he saw
(17:37):
because when we were in the lineup, one of the girls in
front of me, like so far she's like, oh, do you want to get him
signed? And I'm like, yes.
So I gave the Ted doll to her like of trust just gave it to
her. And then she gave it to another
girl. So it like.
Demonstrated SO 10. 7° of. So it got.
The Ted body served Ted body served to.
The front as you do, Yeah, to get to Mark Wahlberg. 100%.
(18:04):
I would have done the same. Right.
Damn, so as I was going to say, I have actually almost been
killed by Uber and I don't have an app with them.
One of them. Tesla Uber drivers nearly ran me
over while crossing. The Street.
I forgot the original topic. We don't have a topic.
(18:24):
There was no real topic. Just we talked about Uber's in
the sidetracks, OK? See, that's why we're the
squirrel hour. Because we squirrel.
No squirrel after dark. Squirrel.
Still squirrel. It's.
Still squirreling? Yeah, there is no tangent.
They're just side tangent. It's just squirrels all the way
down. A husband looks annoyed.
What were you saying? Nothing.
I'm done. OK, stories.
(18:46):
Annoyed now? Yeah, You.
Got your arms folded? Yeah, I'm waiting for others.
He's not here. So, Titan, you had a thing you
wanted to say. Your turn.
Fuck, I'm actually trying to remember it actually.
No. No, no, no, actually, No,
actually it was, I was, I was going to work and I took an Uber
(19:08):
because I didn't want to wait for a taxi.
And I'm sending an Uber on the Mary Hill bypass.
And it was, it was, I'm in the Uber.
And you know how when you're in a Tesla, they have the screen?
Yep. And I'm pretty sure there was a
(19:31):
it was either a text message or a notification saying please.
So I'm like, that's a little concerning.
I managed to get my. I managed to get to my
destination on time good before I needed to start my shift for
work, but it was still weird. You know what?
(19:53):
You know what's really disconcerting?
We work. Actually I only now work at a
liquor store part time. I cannot tell you, but I was
sharing the boys used to work atthis particular liquor store.
Yep. Yeah, I did.
And I cannot tell you the amountof times that taxi, not Uber
taxi drivers have come in on their shift and picked up a mini
(20:17):
Mickey of vodka and I've seen them go out and drinking it
while before they get even in their car.
I have lost count of how many times of how many times I've
seen them literally drinking it,getting in their car, in their
cab, drinking this or mixing it with drink and then continuing
to drive passengers and picking up passengers.
So I would open the store at 9 AM 90% of my customers between
(20:43):
9:00 AM and noon were taxi drivers picking up.
Not a mini Mickey, a Mickey. 375milliliters.
For the whole day of vodka. Yeah, just a Mickey 375.
Different different drivers seemto be all the same company
(21:04):
though. Yeah, we don't discuss, we don't
talk about that or anything else, but we we witnessed this
so. Yeah, but there was also dump
truck drivers that were coming in.
Oh dear. Lord.
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, and picking upMickey's of Vodka.
I've had rubbish drivers come inbecause.
(21:29):
We're on the way to the dump. Kind of, yeah.
Yeah. Oh yeah.
Well. Not really on the way to the
dump, but we've got six different garbage companies.
Yeah, located within half a milefrom us.
That's true. Yeah, they did.
Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, don't.
Wear those spas. No spas.
No names will be mentioned whatsoever.
(21:51):
I wish I could remember the nameof the dump truck driver though.
I'll blast that all over the place, no?
That's frightening. Well, considering I don't know
if any of you've heard, but I I,I mean, I watched the news
Monday to Friday, the noon global news every day, and
recently a dump truck company. Yes, it's disturbing.
(22:14):
So in Burnaby, Burnaby RCMP pulled over a dump truck and the
driver was arrested for being intoxicated behind the wheel of
a loaded dump truck. It gets better.
It's the second driver from the same company in two months that
(22:40):
has gotten stopped in the same area for being intoxicated
behind the wheel while operatinga fully loaded dump truck.
That's frightening. That's.
Disturbing. That's frightening.
Yeah, that's disturbing. So Needless to say, RCMP have
passed over information to Canadian Transportation and they
(23:05):
are now dealing with this company.
Yeah, it's it's yeah, it's creepy that, that both of that
has been been very truthful. Yeah, yeah.
Yikes. So it I've got something creepy.
I got something that happened tome during while I was working at
my job. Really.
OK, do tell. So I'm hearing your stories.
No, not gonna not gonna mention where I work.
(23:28):
We never, we never do. Yep, you don't have to add that
up. So.
We all need to tell where jukey works, yeah?
Because we want you to come in. Yeah.
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's, that's the
difference. That's different.
Yeah. So for my work, I deal with a
lot of, shall we say, confidential, secured, secured.
(23:52):
Documents. Documents, yes.
Thank you, Sharon. You're welcome.
And I know you work. I obviously, You know where I
work. You.
Yeah, Rick, you know where I work.
Of course, Cher knows where I work.
Of course we do. And Juki knows where I work.
Too, I mean the company we work for doesn't necessarily deal
(24:13):
only specifically with secure highly confidential like we're
we're talking about government secure confidential documents is
what he deals with. But your company doesn't
necessarily deal with strictly that, they deal with other stuff
as well. Yes, we do.
We deal with, yes, any, pretty much anything dealing with
(24:35):
business related. Well, thank you for shedding my
porn documents. No, no, no.
Those are still in storage for another three years before they
get shredded. Yeah, seven years is a.
Seven years is for tax, yes. Three years is for porn.
OK, that's fine. No, no, it's actually seven
years. For porn as well.
Statue of invitations. Seven years.
(24:57):
Seven years is what I've been told got you and what we've been
dealing with. Yeah, it's the statutes of
limitations. So anyway, I came across I.
What's the perfect words dildo? No, I don't think I should.
Say that's such AT bone thing tosay.
No, I want to say I deal with that.
(25:18):
I came across a certain name that is familiar with me.
OK, very cool. A person or a thing?
Can you? What kind of name?
Person, place, or thing. It's a person OK that I have a
relationship with. Fair enough.
OK. OK, very good.
(25:39):
I'm. More than free to expand on this
after the episode. Of course, of course.
I just want to be clear what we were talking about.
Oh yeah, I. Know he he.
He may be bounded by an NDA on air.
I don't need the specifics, I was just curious what entity we
were talking about. Personal relationship that I
(25:59):
have with a certain individual that.
Whose documents you came? Across, yes, documents I came
across and it actually kind of made me laugh because it is the
second time that I've come across certain documents that
I've looked at. First one was like years ago,
(26:20):
probably months ago actually. And it still, it still makes me
laugh today. I look forward to hearing the
story after Off Air. Off Air the podcast, Yeah.
Off air I want every detail. Yeah, I feel like there's going
to be some details. For me, obviously without
sharing too much info, these documents because obviously this
(26:43):
is now like the focus of all of our attentions right now.
The documents of said person whoyou have a you know off air
association with, are they incriminating documents or are
they just general like they're just.
They're just documents. They're just general documents.
So you know how much money this mofo makes and he ain't sharing.
(27:09):
Surprisingly enough, it's not about money.
OK, even better. I look forward to hearing the
story. Divorce paperless.
So no, no, no, no like. This.
The way my brain works, I have to actually like, sorry, I'm
gonna like, your brain's not braining.
(27:29):
No, no, my brain's not braining.Happens a lot on the show.
Growing up, I'm more of a physical learn like a physical
learner. Like I have to show you, if you
show me what to do, I will do it95% of the time done correctly.
Other than that, if you tell me what to do, my husband's the
(27:54):
same out the window. It's it's out the window.
It's not, it's not gonna you're.A visual, physical learner.
Yes, my husband's the same. Yeah.
If you had paperwork in front ofyou that visually had like
pictures of what to do as opposed to words of do this, do
that, that's interesting. The pictures would assist you
more than the words would. The yeah, the pictures would
(28:16):
probably assist me more, but if you show me how to do it, I
would. It's gonna stay in my brain for
a long time. Which is what?
I did. Yeah, tactile learning.
Yeah, which is, which is one of the reasons why.
I mean he is a good bottom now so.
(28:36):
Which is why I scored the best percentile for getting my
forklift certification. Cuz you're visual.
Cuz I'm no, cuz I've had it. I've done it before.
Of course it was during. It was at a company that didn't
really care about. Regulations or policies?
(28:58):
Safety, Safety. It's.
Here, go with that. Yeah, you.
Didn't really care. Yeah.
And so you worked for No, never mind.
Don't. I'm not gonna name shame.
Don't name shame in the Lower Mainland here, there's many
companies out there. Could that could be fall fall
under that? Yeah, it's frightening.
(29:19):
Description sadly. So.
And I work in the trucking industry, so.
It's bottom line. I'm a visual.
I'm a visual learner. You, you show me how to do it. 9
times out of 10 I'll do it correctly.
I can attest he is a very, very good visual learner.
He abides to instruction really well.
(29:43):
Good to know. That that answers like what I
get a. Few drinks.
If you get a few drinks of me, I'll definitely learn it.
Looks. Like 123.
He's good to go. Before that one, no, no, you
got. Right, so you're ready to learn.
No, you got to count before. You got to count before that.
So you're ready to learn. 9 times out of 10 you might not
(30:03):
even need that, you just need toget him in the right mood.
All right, so you're ready to learn.
He's ready to learn Rough. As long as I can call in the
next day off work. Oh yeah, This is why I'm.
Usually that. This is why my birthday is the
day. At the time.
The next the next day, it's after work.
Yeah. We've that's why.
Fly trying to. Where's our swatter space here
(30:25):
so. We left it outside.
I believe you left it outside. Damn it.
All right, I have to go. I I have to go eat.
I don't leave the table, no. No.
Well, I have to, no. No.
There's a there's a thing at thebottom.
Does that mean nobody's being recorded?
Well, it's either that or it's gonna get or we're gonna be
experiencing yellow pup syndromereal fast.
OK, let him go. I mean, I could always.
(30:46):
Do not the first time. Don't.
Just don't. Turn yourself down.
I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna turn your microphone down.
Just now he's laid his headphones on to the soundboard
and probably muted all of us. Yeah.
No, you're fine. We're good now.
Nothing is recorded on. That's the solution.
So here's the deep dark secret about Spider that is not a
(31:11):
replica of his penis, no. Whose is it?
Some guy in the UK Billy Billy ball bags.
Yeah, some rather. What a wonderful name his
parents must be, so I. Believe that's his website his.
Website. Yeah, he makes.
Those or. Penis bottle toppers and.
I'm. I mean this is.
(31:31):
Hilarious was I? Was I drunk for that one time
though? Yes, for that.
Which? I wasn't there, but yes, if you
have to ask, you were. All times.
In my experience, if you have toask if you were drunk for.
It maybe you were not not fully drunk, but.
Beverages were. Ingested.
You may have had a couple. Sobriety wasn't a thing if you
(31:54):
have to ask moral of that story,I agree.
But there was also consent, 100%consent.
Consent was always given. That's.
Important however, if you have to ask, sobriety was not there.
That's in my experience. As somebody with the with the
ADHD's, no. If I can't remember something,
it's just 'cause I can't remember it.
I could be completely sober and I will still forget shit.
(32:17):
So no. No, unfortunately.
That is my experience. So no, I'm trying to remember
the time that Spider taught me. Oh yeah, you were time.
You were definitely intoxicated that night.
It it. See the great thing about J Rod
is that when he gets intoxicated, he becomes
(32:39):
extremely flirty 9 times out of 10.
Who doesn't over the few times that you know, we have
experienced each other tonsil hockey.
Yeah, J Rod is the one that makes moves.
He's the one that gets all the frisky and the kinky going on.
(32:59):
Honestly, looking at that face, I can see it.
Yeah, right. That makes sense.
That checks out. So even though he may be
intoxicated and fully consensual, he's the one that
brings it on and starts it. I blame it all on him.
That's fair, I get that a lot. Yeah, I can see why.
I'm happy with the flirty bottomwhen they're drunk.
(33:21):
That you're just more fun that way.
As long as you got Lube, you're fine.
I always pack Lube right? We all do.
I don't even know. How you don't carry Lube?
No, I use other methods. What Cresco?
(33:43):
My tongue and spit and lots of work.
Oh my God that dries out so quick.
Yeah, no, honey, they're they'rethey're.
I do it well. They're force good involved.
We're getting the new bell. OK, you know what?
I'm going to have to teach you alittle trick off air.
Please do. That you're going to have to.
Train me, Train me. Actually, you could probably
(34:06):
reach it. So I have my little behind you
on on my check out YouTube channel.
See my new Kids on the Block Bagepisode 50 Bag.
For yes, helpful tips. Right.
Apparently what happened to afterwards and off air.
It's a whole new channel now. Purell.
(34:28):
Purell not it's not. Purell.
It's a Purell bottle. There you go.
I feel like Purell is not the answer.
No, no. No, no.
Millennium is apparently. So the travel bottle of Purell
is Lube. You buy it.
Oh, I have a travel bottle of Lube too.
I just prefer to use my tongue for things.
Well, you can use your tongue for things, but it doesn't
(34:49):
always work for other things. No, no, you start with the
tongue for things. And the great thing about this
is to the Lube. So the Lube that Spider and I
use. I can assess to that.
Cannot stay in a bottle. Every single container that
we've ever purchased in the past, it leaks through every
single one of them. But these little Purell bottles,
(35:12):
these travel bottles, it has never leaked.
OK, so I have a story about that.
Just to make sure you remember that the Purell bottle you know
you've replaced with Lube because there was a few weeks
ago. Did you use the wrong bottle?
Yes. Did you sanitize somebody?
(35:32):
'S yes I did me. No, underneath he he sanitized.
Himself, I sanitized myself. At least you were a clean boy.
I was definitely clean, so I took the label off of my when I.
Turn it from a sanitary bottle into.
(35:53):
A. Yeah, instant automatically like
instant. Regret.
Damn I regret, yet I felt ultimately clean after that.
I mean, your soul was cleansed. It was better than any baptism
could ever do. Your soul was cleansed, Yeah.
Yeah, I was campus. Yeah.
I was like, oh wow. Was so cleansed that Jesus felt
(36:17):
it, Yeah. He sure.
Did. Yeah.
Yeah, that was yeah. That was.
That was. Damn, that was.
Experience, yeah. Eye opening.
Yeah, it was. It was that is.
Or maybe eye puckering. Yeah, puckering more so.
Feel like eye bulging like you're making a pop out because
that seems like a moment. Yeah.
(36:39):
You don't want. Your third eye it just.
Happened. It was definitely, it definitely
made the moment rather unique. I'm like, all right, I got, I
got to run. I'll be right back.
See, the great thing about it isis it was discovered before he
inserted to a different person. Yeah, thank goodness.
Could you imagine bottoming with?
(37:01):
Sanitizer. Wait, wait, there's questions.
Wait. So you used it on yourself, but
you were the top. No, I was bottoming so like.
I thought you said before I already top somebody else.
You told me you used it on Big John.
No, no, I used it on. I was bottoming.
For the record, Big John is justhilarious as a name.
Yeah, No, no, no further comments required.
(37:22):
Continue the story. Thank you.
You sanitized your rosebud, Yes.Oh.
Well, that sounds like an awful life choice.
Like bad life, decisions were made all around that day.
It really was. Yeah, so you weren't at the
bottom anymore, you were the top.
Yeah. Hopefully he's versed.
Yeah. Right.
Remember boys and girls to properly label all of your
(37:46):
containers to avoid such problems as.
Absolutely as that, yes. Keep seeing if he just used his
tongue as his bit that wouldn't have happened out of.
The. Bedroom Keep your hand sanitizer
away from your Lube. Keep your hand sanitized, not
your asshole. Yeah, re label your.
Lube. Oh my God that's BA from next
door. Bleached asshole.
(38:07):
Oh bleached asshole so. So our our neighbor got a
inflatable hot tub like we used to have.
And she, it was her first time. She threw her chemicals into it
and everything else. Yeah, we got a message from her
like a little while later. She's like, I think I did
(38:27):
something wrong, got into the hot tub and everything's fucking
burning. That's the wrong choice.
Yeah. So we're like, what did you use?
Pure bleach. Not even water, just a tub full
of bleach. Yeah, chlorine, way more than
she needed for this small littlehot tub like and and what we
used was bromine. Yeah, bromine for spas and and
(38:49):
you know, yeah chlorine for she burn is for pools for for
spools. Only you had googled that.
She used chlorine. Only so simple to find the
answer. But she probably used a puck the
size that, yeah, swimming pool. Yes, yeah, it was a lot.
So again, if only you had googled the thing, yeah.
So she informed us that things were burning and that she had
used chlorine. And we're like, well, that's
(39:12):
your first. You just dipped yourself into a
pool of bleach. Now you have a bleached asshole.
She's like, well, it feels like it.
She burned the pigment off her asshole.
Yep. So.
It burns when I pee. Spider Nope it just burns
generally cuz you use bleach on your whole body.
It got better. Well, that's so.
(39:33):
No, no, the story got better. That means it got worse.
Yep, it was done from here. The ironically funny part about
it is. Is that Shari's or boyfriend
Peter? Basically has been.
Companion is black so we pissed ourselves laughing for like when
(39:54):
we woke up when when she told usI'm like well that's great when
he got into the tub as he bleached halfway down so he's
like black from the top up and white from the bottom down and
she fucking like because all I see is Peter being bleached
halfway down and she. Died laughing and it was months
(40:15):
later. I'm all thinking of it doesn't
matter if you're black. Or yeah, yeah, right.
I'm like all I saw was like halfand half.
All right, feed of mind of Jackson.
Yeah, it was away. From the waist.
Down it was, it was so funny. Yeah, it was so much funny.
And then months later we were atAI think we were in Portland, we
were travelling and we walked into a sex door and we actually
saw a little packet of anal bleach.
(40:38):
You could do anal. You ever seen those?
It's. Yeah, some.
Some. Women.
Some women. Actually.
And they bleach the hair on. Their.
Ass Yeah, they bleach. All the body issues I could
have, that is not the one I wantto.
Do shaving. They would bleach it.
They bleach it. Not just women, a lot of men do
it. Too, Of all the body image
issues I could have, the color of my asshole is not on the
list, no. So, but you can.
(40:58):
So we saw the other things I canworry about.
We saw this little packet. Or a porn star.
At Bare paddle I am. There you go.
So we saw this little packet of anal bleaching and obviously we
took a picture of it and sent itto, you know, Sherry right away.
So I'm like, well, the rest of your, your rest of your, your
rest of your husband is bleached.
Do we need his asshole bleached too?
I mean, if it's on the waist down, no.
(41:19):
Yeah, we were like, we can bringthis back for you if you wanted.
The rest of him white too. And she just fucking died.
So shout out to our neighbor bleached asshole Sherry.
I haven't seen you in a while, lady.
I miss you. Yeah.
Yeah, it was a good, it was a good funny story, people.
For laughing at those jokes. What's?
That, but that's what she gets for.
(41:40):
People for laughing at those jokes.
That's what she gets for drivingan Audi.
You know what I mean? It happens.
It was a fun story. It was a lot of fun.
Good, good times. I.
Love her is. It an Audi or an Audi is that?
No, it's an innie. Male.
That's me. Yeah, So that's a that's a
story. I have our our wonderful next
(42:02):
door neighbors who are fantasticpeople as.
Well, that's how, yeah, that's how are.
They're very sanitized assholes.Yeah, they're very Peter has a
very sanitized asshole. They both do as they definitely
do on on loan like next week or our next door neighbors.
We told the story after the podcast.
I was designated a a golden retriever puppy.
I don't think Juky heard this one.
(42:23):
We were outside 2 days ago. Our next door neighbor's dog,
the golden retriever. Barely.
He's been really chewing his foot, so he has a cone of shame
on. Oh dear.
So a cone of shame. Not just his foot that he was
been chewing on to the point where there's no fur?
No, from his foot. Apparently he's been chewing on
his balls as well. Yeah, poor.
Buddy so no fur. So he comes out, he's got the
(42:44):
cone of shame. He comes out and he's running
around and then our next door neighbor Aaron, she she, she
yells out. She's like cuz it's always known
that I their dog whenever he sees me and he gets near me and
I give him the belly rubs he always loses his shit and just
pees everywhere. Oh my God, I've I've been peed
on. It's just this thing, I get
(43:05):
excited, I'm going to pee. And then Aaron yelled out.
She's like, oh, do you get when you get excited, you pee all
over the place too. That was that was that was after
we sometimes that we had the episode of which dog breed are
you right, right, right. And he was determined to be the
golden retriever. Yeah.
So. Erin, she, she played on that
one like well played on her part.
(43:26):
She's like, she said that for sure.
And I responded, I'm like, well,maybe sometimes she's like, I'm
sorry, I had to say it. I'm like.
If they asked nicely. Yeah, but I know, right?
But it was a. It was a.
Fun. And of course I yelled from the
car. Not wrong.
So it's, it's fun that we have such amazing neighbors, right?
And they're part of our life, and they know our life.
(43:48):
Shout out to the Zacunas. Yeah, they're like.
They are awesome. They're, yeah, they're we're so
blessed to our neighbors. That's their last name.
Zacuna. Yeah, they're Croatian.
Croatian. That's a crazy last.
Name. Yeah, there's like an upside
down V. Or there's some words,
something. On a letter.
That's cool though. We're blessed that they are our
neighbors and we've watched their kids grow up a long time
(44:10):
and yeah, we're very blessed. OK oldest son fucked me up
yesterday driving. So proud of him.
So he went in to get his learners his learner's permit
and passed both his learners andhis motorcycle learners at the
same time. Passed both of them.
(44:32):
So good for you kid. Like amazing.
Just recently passed with flyingcolors and got his N.
Nice. Hey, yeah, that's awesome.
Yeah, they're smart kids. Way to go kid.
Yeah, so yesterday Luca comes driving up in the family van
with Marco in the passenger seat, and mom and dad are in the
(44:56):
house. Oh yeah, that fucked me up.
Yeah, because. We met them when they were like,
we've been here for 13 years. We've been here for 13 years.
They moved in about a year afterus.
Yeah, but so. Wow.
Yeah. Luca is 17 I believe. 1718 well
(45:18):
it. Would have to because.
Mark Marco just graduated, I believe he just, he just went
from middle school to high school.
So he just, he just finished grade 8.
Starting grade 9 this September is Marco Luca I believe is
starting grade 12. When we met these kids, Marco, I
(45:39):
think wasn't even in just in kindergarten.
Wow, J Rod. They were wee little lads.
They, well, I mean, yeah, they were.
Oh, you watched them grow up. We.
We. Literally, we little Croatian.
Menaces on the road. OK, so one of the best stories
I've ever had. And now he's grown up.
Yeah, and he's. Driving.
He's grown up. That's awesome.
(45:59):
By himself, yeah. I, I, I think that hubby, I know
we, he's never forgotten it, butwe went on vacation.
We went home. Mark or Marco, Marco was the
youngest one was very young. And we went, we went on vacation
and we, when we came back, we had only known for a few years.
(46:20):
But when they came back in there, when he was in the Elegas
elementary school, he had to a project.
So we came back and in our mailbox there was a little
certificate, which I still have.And it said choose a safe
person, like a safe neighbor or warder Luca.
What's that? It was.
(46:40):
Was that Marco or I? I thought it was Luca.
It was Marco. Yeah, Marco was it, and he had
to choose it. So we came back in a little
certificate and said blah, blah,blah.
Like my safe, my safe neighbor is Paul, so and he put it in the
mailboxes like I feel safe with Paul and like he had a little
certificate he made-up and like,yeah, my safe neighbor, if I
felt anything wrong, was Paul. So yeah, that was like the
(47:02):
absolutely fucking heart wrenching.
There were two wonderful things that happened that was really
sweet to come back to that certificate.
It wasn't just on that certificate, as far as the
school knew, if anything happened to their parents.
You were the. Emergency.
I was the emergency contact. Spider had authorization to
collect them from school. Or they put their they put my
(47:25):
name down. I was authorized to pick them
up. That's amazing.
Isn't that amazing? The.
Funny thing about it is or the the even more heart warming
thing about it is, is they didn't even like, you know, say
hey, can we use you as did Marcodid this on his.
On his own. And then his parents found out
afterwards. And then, you know, the, the
(47:47):
little certificate was left in our mailbox.
Spider was like almost in tears with this.
And then when we talked to the parents, they're like, oh, yeah,
we forgot to ask you. Is it OK if you're, you know,
like, oh. By the way.
Agency contact, yeah. And we're like, yeah.
I mean, how'd you say no to thatthough?
Yeah, absolutely. You couldn't and you can't.
(48:08):
Yeah. And one other event that I chose
you especially when. They do it.
That way, Yeah. And that they they chose us,
that they knew they were a safe neighborhood and, you know, they
were people. And again, we were blessed.
And one other thing that really amazingly happened, I'm sure
we've mentioned on the show, butyou've never heard it was that
there was. We have our groundskeeping crew
that they hired. It was a couple of years ago and
(48:30):
we have the pride flag. We know we have the Canadian
pride flag proudly displayed over it.
And we have the Jeep and everything.
And I came back one day and thenthere was a little sticky note
from an employee that worked with that crew and it was
stuffed in the windshield. And it said I was along the
words of you know what, I'm really, really amazed or.
(48:54):
Or no, no, that wasn't from the groundskeeper.
Yeah, it was. It was from the groundskeeper
crew. It was from the crew.
It was a company that they hire from the groundskeeping crew.
That left you the note that saidthey were so proud to see you
and it made them feel more like themselves.
Yeah, that was written by like, the handwriting on that note was
from a 12 or 13 year old. That was it, one of the kids in
(49:18):
the complex. No, it was.
It was from one of the kids thatworked there.
It wasn't the groundskeeper. We'll discuss this afterwards.
I think there maybe there was 2 notes because I know there was 1
from 1 of the neighborhood kids not that long ago.
Yeah, yeah, That said before they moved in.
Here, that's sitting on your fridge.
Didn't say they moved in. There's one sitting on.
Your fridge. It's on the fridge.
It literally doesn't say that it's on the fridge.
(49:40):
They kept it. Anyway, we'll figure it out.
TBD. Yes.
But it was it was really nice that they felt comfortable.
They saw the pride flag and it basically said that, you know,
it was really nice that they could be themselves.
And it was, it was someone that was closeted that saw the pride
flag and the vehicles and it's amazing.
They just kind of like, you know, it empower them to feel
(50:02):
like they could be themselves. So it was.
That's what it should be. Yeah, exactly.
So amazing. That's wonderful.
I love. That it was nice to show.
And everyone comes and we're very proud.
You know, when everybody comes into our complex and they see
it, we have a pride flag up there.
We are. We are proud to be ourselves.
We don't hide. Yeah.
And we're, and we're not ashamedto be who we are.
Yep, and everyone's welcome in our place, right?
(50:25):
And if you're not, you know why.Yeah, no shit.
Yeah. You know what you did?
Yep. J Rod How are we looking on
time, buddy? Got about 5 minutes all right.
Share a show Sharon. Would you like there be silence
for 5 minutes? 5 minutes silence.
(50:48):
From those guys. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait a
minute. Wait a minute.
I got something to say. Shout out to Ozzy Osbourne.
Oh, rock God. Prince of Darkness.
Amazing. He's he's influenced a lot of
people, a lot of musicians. Much respect to him.
(51:11):
Oh yeah, he's done. I'm pretty sure the first Ozzy
Osbourne song I listened to was maybe Crazy Train or Iron Man.
Nice. Both great songs.
Both both great awesome songs tolisten to.
Yep, they are so. Condolences to the Osbourne
family. Good, good shot.
(51:33):
Much respect to Ozzy Osbourne for himself.
Absolutely he influenced. Just he, yeah, he influenced a
lot of musicians, yeah. On the bits and pieces we'll
miss. You Oz.
Well said. We'll miss you, Ozzy.
Absolutely, buddy. Prince of Darkness.
Oh fuck yeah he was. We love.
We love you, man. He was.
Awesome man. So we need a second secret word
(51:57):
for the stinky pups for this episode.
We do. On that note, today is July
27th. I want to do a shout out to my
sister who does not listen to the show but tomorrow is her
birthday. Happy birthday, sister.
Happy birthday. Happy birthday, sister.
Charmaine, Charmaine Charmaine Happy birthday Charmaine's
(52:18):
birthday, July 28th. She was born Black Friday in
Edmonton, so I believe that was 87.
So happy 25th. Wow. 38.
He's 87. 87 We don't age people.Right, I will age forever.
It's a good year. No no no.
I will age my family every chance I get.
(52:39):
Oh, is that one? And we're shouting them out
then. Yeah, no, my, my, my younger
sister is old, that's why. They'll talk a minute.
Yeah, we're about there. I know we're about to shut her
down to make sure we get on YouTube.
I I got another one. Happy birthday to my dad
celebrates his 70th. Wow, seven birthday.
(52:59):
J Rods. Damn, 70.
Good for you, buddy. Way to go, Papa.
Happy birthday. Happy birthday, Papa.
J Rod. That's great.
And my niece. Yeah, you should be proud.
My niece Taylor is about to haveher second child within the next
couple weeks. I believe she was 38 weeks her
last posting and she's like she wants a baby out.
(53:21):
Yeah, I don't. I can't say I blame her.
Grand nephew? Yep.
I get topped out with that boy. Nice.
So I get topped. I have shit out right away.
I have a great niece and a greatnephew coming.
Amazing. I'm a great uncle times 3.
Oh, and the Gray hairs are perfectly showing.
It's perfect. Die so I can't.
(53:43):
See them from here either. Time, hair or the partner don't
worry, they're. There I know so the.
Secret word. There's.
The stinky pups is going to be. Aussie, we're about to run out.
Aussie, Aussie, Aussie. Aussie is.
That's a great word. Aussie it is, say everybody,
then we gotta shut her down or. Love peas and chicken graze who
all listen to you or you can listen to us next time.
(54:05):
After the pride, after pride, evil love you right?
That was aggressive. That was excessive.
Well, This is why we're not puppies like you.
Some of us don't need the snouts.
They'll be very nice. And on that note, hello
everyone, welcome to Squirrels After Dark After Hours
Uncensored Season 3 Episode 15. An interesting crew with us
(00:27):
today. We are missing a couple, but we
are all here. First of all, I would like to
say this episode is recorded on the traditional and unseated
territories of the Coquitlam First Nations.
Thank you for allowing us to be here.
With that said, let's get to theintros.
Wait, no, no intros, Not yet. Shout out to those who are not
(00:51):
here. T-bone unfortunately was not
able to make it today due to unforeseen circumstances.
Smile down. Sorry.
Posing for. A photo.
Hobbies, taking pictures, There you go.
Shout out to Sprinkles, Silent Peter and the kids.
(01:13):
They weren't. They actually have quite a few
concert plans, so they may not be back until mid to late August
I believe. But we do.
We do miss them immensely and love them lots.
On that note, having fun intros to the people who are here,
smile. Jeez.
(01:37):
Thank you. OK, so we have the fluffy and
cuddly Otter pup Titan J Rod Rare.
There he is. We have my sexy husband 2 point
(01:57):
O spider pup I'd like to introduce the world to the new
hood 2 point O spider pup Rick Hunter the the the Top Chef
executive who has not cut her finger off in the last two weeks
(02:19):
Jukey. Got another bruise?
Didn't say anything about bruises.
That's normal. That's that's understandable.
Returning guest from previous episode.
Welcome back, Skyler. Greetings.
Hello and a newbie for the firsttime ever to the chaos that is
our show Danigan. Hi.
(02:42):
Welcome. Thank you.
Good puppy and. That's how after.
Dark happens at 5:30 in the afternoon and it's still light
out. It's dark somewhere, thought.
I'd put that. In there I mean when it's.
Summer. Just dim the lights, we're fine.
It's. Yeah, in the winter it's dark
out. Yeah, well, I mean, we're by the
(03:03):
time the episode's uploaded, it's after dark, so OK, we'll go
with that. All right, so just an FYI, this
episode is recorded on the 27th of July.
It will be uploaded on ish around Vancouver Pride parade
today which is August 3rd, so itmay or may not be at
(03:26):
automatically uploaded. OK.
You just say thank goodness for scheduled uploading, I don't
have to worry about it. OK, so you all will hear this
while we are out enjoying Vancouver Pride.
The parade which will include mywell earned pickup truck Hitch,
(03:48):
who will be temporarily named Spot.
Yeah. I'm actually, I've actually
designed and we are going to create a temporary license plate
for my truck that will say spot just for the parade.
I love that. That's amazing.
The the the last part of the entire podcast might be missing
(04:10):
because I just realized that I didn't actually turn up my
volume recording. So I think probably about 70% of
everything I said the last episode would not be recorded.
We'll see, silly. It's always something with you.
I'm literally looking and I'm like, I turned that down when I
went to grab something. So I have a feeling that we've.
(04:34):
We want solutions, not problems.So, well, that's.
OK, well, if you're just hearinghim now, this.
Is welcome back. Spider pup Rick Hunter.
Hello. Oh, snap.
That would be an issue. Did you?
Just cancel the recording now. No, I'm not.
Canceling the recording. I'm just checking.
Keep going, talking, stop. Messing with the screens.
I'm not watching, I'm watching. Yes.
(04:55):
That seemed that seemed appropriate, right?
Yeah. That sounds like it was.
It needed, yeah. Well, that might be a screw up.
Well, you guys are all recorded.You they've heard people have
heard my voices enough. That's fine as long.
As you sound like it's good. As long as you're all recorded,
who cares? I just most of talking it's OK
exactly. As long as it's recorded though,
right? No where your voices will be
(05:17):
recorded no if if you look up and see what happened here is
when I do this and it no longer actually.
The green dots are going away. Yeah, I I don't have a voice.
I have to actually my input intothe system was down.
Again, I'm color blind so I don't see green.
OK, see the dots? What colors do they see?
(05:39):
Let's just simplify this for J Rod.
The episode was recorded, Rick wasn't.
Whatever. Whatever color you do see those
bars, they're not there. Yeah, all right.
So I might not be in. I might be like a ghost.
They'll hear my echo through your microphones, maybe.
Oops. Sorry people.
Like I said, they've heard my voice enough.
(06:00):
They'll survive. You're all in the episode.
We're all only. 50% of the episodes that I have been part
of have been successful. I've only been on 2.
That's what I get for leaving the Table 3.
Yeah, yes. This is your 4th.
Technically speaking, so yes. So 25% I don't.
Know if this one's successful yet or not?
(06:22):
And given that he only just camein part way through, this one
also isn't entirely successful, is it?
When when did I get up to go fora glass of wine?
Midway No. Break.
Three quarters, 3/4 I didn't do the full thing.
Whenever I went up like I left the table to go over, I turned
the microphone down so I didn't record making a sound.
I. Don't even remember you leaving
during the. Recording wow this episode.
(06:43):
Thanks a lot. I do remember.
Him leaving I was. Paying.
I remember him playing the Weegee Speaks.
Thank you, Juki. You were mostly asking
questions, so it's just us talking to nobody.
Answering questions from the. Yeah, just just answering random
question, just telling random stories unprompted as we do.
Explain why the AI was so drunk.Touché.
Oh, that could explain. A lot that actually could
(07:07):
explain why the AI oh that mightthat's.
Possible. That might totally make sense
because the conversation would be smart.
One sided? Oh, that totally.
Makes sense why it was so weird.We're just telling random
stories unprompted because the prompt wasn't being heard
because you were recording. That totally makes sense.
(07:32):
That is funny. So we're all just bragging about
things that we did, Yeah. OK.
Yeah. Cool, I mean Spider was there in
spirit. He wasn't.
No, apparently not. No, no, no, He was there in
spirit. He just wasn't there in mind.
There was no evidence of that orvoice.
Wow, YouTube saw it. OK, fair enough.
(07:52):
Yeah, yeah. So he was there, just inside
empty, empty headed puppy. I really need to pay attention
to make sure that I actually have, you know?
Puppy, you're always concerned about checking everybody else
because you'd never leave the table mid recording.
I know I. Think that's only the second.
Well, I generally always have my, you know, booze here ahead.
(08:14):
It was just, you know, randomly I needed to go something else.
Anyway, so also on premises today, we do have Spaz, who is,
I believe, sleeping in his towerat the moment.
At least that's where I saw him last.
Yeah. I see so.
Outside, we've got scamp and art, art, art.
(08:37):
Arctic J Fox More. Puppies.
The brain wasn't raining it. Happens.
More puppies. Burke.
Excuse me? Burke Rare.
There you go. Get it in there.
Like a good roar. Isn't everybody loves his roar.
Yeah, I know. Right it.
(08:58):
Makes me think of Shrek do the Roar.
It's very like ASMR, rare see. It is.
He does very well. Yeah.
He's the only one that can do it.
Everyone loves it. So yeah, every.
That's his thing. What?
I don't even remember how we started that.
We were talking about that juristic Barack Juris.
(09:22):
Yeah, that that meme that was going out just like the
deanosaurs that say the rower red.
Oh my God, I don't. Remember that at all.
I don't remember that, I just. More of these backups.
Apparently you were drinking stronger ciders.
Possibly, and I'm down to the 4 1/2%, you know, Cheers for.
That well. I.
Drink wine, it's tasty Berry. It's tasty, yeah.
(09:45):
BlackBerry and you'll get pregnant.
I just see it's fine. Murray on my side, and Murray
is. So I'll say if it may take a
second we for my upcoming birthday we have a new game.
Drinking game, of course. I will not participate.
I'm out not doing it. I'm scared, forget it.
I will cuz I'm not gonna take everything so literally.
(10:06):
Exactly. So we, we, we played this game
and this game was donated by ourgood friend Brandon or Dusty
from the The Horseman on the Island for my birthday.
Just for the record, the actual title is The Horseman and My
Little Pony. Yes, that's the name of our
group. We can't leave out Pony, no.
(10:27):
Cuz the horseman sounds ominous.Right now this, but then you
throw in My Little Pony. And it's it's fun again.
Yeah, it's yeah, yeah. So the name is the game is
called Buzz and Jay Rod. Yes, you have.
I'm no 95% sure I've played thisgame before.
It's fun and. You'll play it again.
Oh yes, whoa, I don't. Know about that?
(10:50):
Oh, you're talking about buzzed.I thought you were talking
about. Fear Pong?
No, I don't have Fear Pong yet. Yeah, that Fear Pong will be
coming. OK, that's that's what it was.
That's the one I've played Buzz before.
I'm. Scared no.
So this is the just a few cards.Bottom line, make sure you wear
clean underwear. That's drinkopoly.
(11:13):
Doesn't matter. That's this game, too.
Apparently so. One of the cards.
Could we? Not wear clean underwear.
I know not a step one wear underwear just.
Well, that. Too.
Good point. What was a good point I missed?
It step one, wear underwear. Or not.
I don't make it to step one because.
Buddy buddy. Last time we played Drinkopoly
he was wearing mesh underwear. Yes.
(11:35):
He does that. I saw everything.
Absolutely. He also does that.
Yes, I usually wait until I leave though.
Yeah, there's a rule. There's a rule.
Normally we wait for the normal human sleeve before it becomes
that. Sorry.
Not that I'm a normal human, butyou know.
Buzz Drink. You're definitely a Gray area.
Human. She's still a female who is
(11:56):
straight, yes. Yes, so she enjoys penises.
I do. He has one.
Her husband's, yeah. Well, she's got to touch it.
Oh, it's visible. Yes, yes.
There you go anyway. Drink if you would be open to
being in a threesome. You know what?
Make it 3 drinks. 3 drinks. Jeez, there they go.
(12:16):
So we're not playing now. We're not.
Playing now, I was contemplating.
Just practicing. Buzzed If there's something
bubbly in your drink or sorry ifthere's something bubbly in your
cup, drink. These are just some of the fun.
Well, would that not be all drinks because beer is
carbonated? No bubbles, no bubbles.
Yeah. Hard alcohol, no bubbles, no
(12:37):
bubbles. Depending.
On your, not. See This is why I don't see it
with fruit juice. That's why I don't drink wine
and hard alcohol, because I likethe bubbles.
So, I mean, you can bubble up those two things too.
It's called champagne and right.Orange.
Juice. So yeah, mimosive drink if your
mom or dad has a phone case witha flap that looks drink if your
(12:57):
mom or dad has a phone case witha flap that covers the phone
like a book. Yeah, you know it the same.
OK, just for the record, the keydoes.
I have it. I have the wallet, phone case.
You know, you flip it, open yourcard's on one side, your phone's
on the other side that yeah, youso do it.
(13:18):
You got it. Drink.
If you call him Daddy, drink. Yeah.
Right, Daddy H will be here. Drink.
If you've ever commented on a porn video, what could you
possibly have to say, right? OK, I'm not drinking.
I've never commented. I've never commented on a porn
video. No, if it's bad I just changed
the video. I mean, I've made comments, but
(13:40):
I've never actually posted comments, yeah.
Well, what's the point? Who's seeing them?
Who's reading a porn comment? Exactly which player has the
most unread texts? Player with the most has to take
a drink. Not it.
No, definitely I I cannot stand the little red dot, the little
red notification. Thank you.
I have to. Clear.
(14:01):
Funny we were talking about this.
All players with an Uber rating below 4.7.
Drink and then learn how to be aGod damn more respectful person.
I'd actually have to check my Uber rating.
I don't have Uber. I did mine.
You know what mine is 4.98? Out of five?
Whoa, whoa. Wait OK actually don't call
pineapple cuz I can I can actually check on mine.
(14:23):
I think mine's under 4 because Ithink I've only ever had one man
Uber trip that I booked. Yeah, I've never booked an Uber.
Trip I'm I'm taking a sip just for the sake of sipping.
All right, I'm I'm. I'm actually five stars, right?
I mean, I don't. I don't use it very often, so
that's probably why. I was going to say, I'm like,
I've taken hundreds, including in Vegas.
(14:45):
I got 4.98 so I'm pretty impressed.
Yeah, he also gave those driverslike 5 stars too because the
first guy almost killed us doing127 miles an hour down.
He did not get a five star rating anyways, J Rod, you were
saying? He called.
His mom. According to my account I have a
4.91 rating. Show off.
(15:08):
OK wow, but you have 5 guy? With a 5 star.
How did you? Actually have a five star on
Uber. Yeah, cuz I've used it like 6
times. How did you not give him a five
star rating? I don't know, I'm sure.
He didn't crash. Sure I didn't.
I'm sure I gave him good. Ratings We're not dead. 5 stars.
I'm sure I gave him not. The bar is low, I'm not dead. 5
(15:29):
stars. We got from the Flamingo to
Fremont Street in like 37 seconds.
Oh no, I thought you were. I thought you were talking about
the guy almost killed us coming back from.
No, no, no. I'm.
Talking about times that we almost killed you.
The first time in the Tesla. OK, well, yeah, that was.
A Tesla guy in Vegas, that was super cool.
Yeah. No, he called his mom.
(15:51):
Mine. Sorry, I moved the mic.
OK, he we're not going crazy. OK, so our Uber driver, his mom
is a huge Mark Wahlberg fan and we were actually in the Uber to
go to Fremont Street to go to Mark Wahlberg's.
Tequila. Tequila launch.
Tequila launch and he was he wasthere giving out shots of
(16:12):
tequila on Fremont Street. So we took the Uber down there
of. Course, this was the day before
I arrived. Yeah, so.
Absolutely. It was so amazing.
So anyway, we tell him this, he called his mom on speakerphone
in the car to let her know that we're going down to see Mark
Wahlberg. Did you then pick her up and
bring her with you? Right.
(16:33):
I'm pretty sure she told him to go pick her up.
I imagine she did. I because he, he ended up
walking like he was behind the bar giving out the shots and
everything else. And then he actually came out
into the crowd on Fremont Street.
Spider has, I have pictures of Spider.
He was standing right next to Mark.
I touched Mark like they were walking by and I was taking
(16:55):
pictures and he kind of like gotclose enough where I just kind
of went. Fanboy dope.
That's appropriate. Yes.
Yeah, cuz it was Mark. But we got the Ted Doll signed.
He has the teddy bear from Ted. Signed by Mark Rahlberg up in
the He signed him. That's really cool.
We have a video of him signing it and mosh pitting Ted back
(17:17):
into the crowd. It was.
Yeah, that's really cool. Mark totally yeeded Ted into the
crowd and we got him back, oddlyenough.
It was, I mean, there's. Only 1000 people there.
Hi Spaz. It was.
It was the crew. Though.
It was it was the coolest thing,just the reaction that he saw
(17:37):
because when we were in the lineup, one of the girls in
front of me, like so far she's like, oh, do you want to get him
signed? And I'm like, yes.
So I gave the Ted doll to her like of trust just gave it to
her. And then she gave it to another
girl. So it like.
Demonstrated SO 10. 7° of. So it got.
The Ted body served Ted body served to.
The front as you do, Yeah, to get to Mark Wahlberg. 100%.
(18:04):
I would have done the same. Right.
Damn, so as I was going to say, I have actually almost been
killed by Uber and I don't have an app with them.
One of them. Tesla Uber drivers nearly ran me
over while crossing. The Street.
I forgot the original topic. We don't have a topic.
(18:24):
There was no real topic. Just we talked about Uber's in
the sidetracks, OK? See, that's why we're the
squirrel hour. Because we squirrel.
No squirrel after dark. Squirrel.
Still squirrel. It's.
Still squirreling? Yeah, there is no tangent.
They're just side tangent. It's just squirrels all the way
down. A husband looks annoyed.
What were you saying? Nothing.
I'm done. OK, stories.
(18:46):
Annoyed now? Yeah, You.
Got your arms folded? Yeah, I'm waiting for others.
He's not here. So, Titan, you had a thing you
wanted to say. Your turn.
Fuck, I'm actually trying to remember it actually.
No. No, no, no, actually, No,
actually it was, I was, I was going to work and I took an Uber
(19:08):
because I didn't want to wait for a taxi.
And I'm sending an Uber on the Mary Hill bypass.
And it was, it was, I'm in the Uber.
And you know how when you're in a Tesla, they have the screen?
Yep. And I'm pretty sure there was a
(19:31):
it was either a text message or a notification saying please.
So I'm like, that's a little concerning.
I managed to get my. I managed to get to my
destination on time good before I needed to start my shift for
work, but it was still weird. You know what?
(19:53):
You know what's really disconcerting?
We work. Actually I only now work at a
liquor store part time. I cannot tell you, but I was
sharing the boys used to work atthis particular liquor store.
Yep. Yeah, I did.
And I cannot tell you the amountof times that taxi, not Uber
taxi drivers have come in on their shift and picked up a mini
(20:17):
Mickey of vodka and I've seen them go out and drinking it
while before they get even in their car.
I have lost count of how many times of how many times I've
seen them literally drinking it,getting in their car, in their
cab, drinking this or mixing it with drink and then continuing
to drive passengers and picking up passengers.
So I would open the store at 9 AM 90% of my customers between
(20:43):
9:00 AM and noon were taxi drivers picking up.
Not a mini Mickey, a Mickey. 375milliliters.
For the whole day of vodka. Yeah, just a Mickey 375.
Different different drivers seemto be all the same company
(21:04):
though. Yeah, we don't discuss, we don't
talk about that or anything else, but we we witnessed this
so. Yeah, but there was also dump
truck drivers that were coming in.
Oh dear. Lord.
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, and picking upMickey's of Vodka.
I've had rubbish drivers come inbecause.
(21:29):
We're on the way to the dump. Kind of, yeah.
Yeah. Oh yeah.
Well. Not really on the way to the
dump, but we've got six different garbage companies.
Yeah, located within half a milefrom us.
That's true. Yeah, they did.
Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, don't.
Wear those spas. No spas.
No names will be mentioned whatsoever.
(21:51):
I wish I could remember the nameof the dump truck driver though.
I'll blast that all over the place, no?
That's frightening. Well, considering I don't know
if any of you've heard, but I I,I mean, I watched the news
Monday to Friday, the noon global news every day, and
recently a dump truck company. Yes, it's disturbing.
(22:14):
So in Burnaby, Burnaby RCMP pulled over a dump truck and the
driver was arrested for being intoxicated behind the wheel of
a loaded dump truck. It gets better.
It's the second driver from the same company in two months that
(22:40):
has gotten stopped in the same area for being intoxicated
behind the wheel while operatinga fully loaded dump truck.
That's frightening. That's.
Disturbing. That's frightening.
Yeah, that's disturbing. So Needless to say, RCMP have
passed over information to Canadian Transportation and they
(23:05):
are now dealing with this company.
Yeah, it's it's yeah, it's creepy that, that both of that
has been been very truthful. Yeah, yeah.
Yikes. So it I've got something creepy.
I got something that happened tome during while I was working at
my job. Really.
OK, do tell. So I'm hearing your stories.
No, not gonna not gonna mention where I work.
(23:28):
We never, we never do. Yep, you don't have to add that
up. So.
We all need to tell where jukey works, yeah?
Because we want you to come in. Yeah.
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's, that's the
difference. That's different.
Yeah. So for my work, I deal with a
lot of, shall we say, confidential, secured, secured.
(23:52):
Documents. Documents, yes.
Thank you, Sharon. You're welcome.
And I know you work. I obviously, You know where I
work. You.
Yeah, Rick, you know where I work.
Of course, Cher knows where I work.
Of course we do. And Juki knows where I work.
Too, I mean the company we work for doesn't necessarily deal
(24:13):
only specifically with secure highly confidential like we're
we're talking about government secure confidential documents is
what he deals with. But your company doesn't
necessarily deal with strictly that, they deal with other stuff
as well. Yes, we do.
We deal with, yes, any, pretty much anything dealing with
(24:35):
business related. Well, thank you for shedding my
porn documents. No, no, no.
Those are still in storage for another three years before they
get shredded. Yeah, seven years is a.
Seven years is for tax, yes. Three years is for porn.
OK, that's fine. No, no, it's actually seven
years. For porn as well.
Statue of invitations. Seven years.
(24:57):
Seven years is what I've been told got you and what we've been
dealing with. Yeah, it's the statutes of
limitations. So anyway, I came across I.
What's the perfect words dildo? No, I don't think I should.
Say that's such AT bone thing tosay.
No, I want to say I deal with that.
(25:18):
I came across a certain name that is familiar with me.
OK, very cool. A person or a thing?
Can you? What kind of name?
Person, place, or thing. It's a person OK that I have a
relationship with. Fair enough.
OK. OK, very good.
(25:39):
I'm. More than free to expand on this
after the episode. Of course, of course.
I just want to be clear what we were talking about.
Oh yeah, I. Know he he.
He may be bounded by an NDA on air.
I don't need the specifics, I was just curious what entity we
were talking about. Personal relationship that I
(25:59):
have with a certain individual that.
Whose documents you came? Across, yes, documents I came
across and it actually kind of made me laugh because it is the
second time that I've come across certain documents that
I've looked at. First one was like years ago,
(26:20):
probably months ago actually. And it still, it still makes me
laugh today. I look forward to hearing the
story after Off Air. Off Air the podcast, Yeah.
Off air I want every detail. Yeah, I feel like there's going
to be some details. For me, obviously without
sharing too much info, these documents because obviously this
(26:43):
is now like the focus of all of our attentions right now.
The documents of said person whoyou have a you know off air
association with, are they incriminating documents or are
they just general like they're just.
They're just documents. They're just general documents.
So you know how much money this mofo makes and he ain't sharing.
(27:09):
Surprisingly enough, it's not about money.
OK, even better. I look forward to hearing the
story. Divorce paperless.
So no, no, no, no like. This.
The way my brain works, I have to actually like, sorry, I'm
gonna like, your brain's not braining.
(27:29):
No, no, my brain's not braining.Happens a lot on the show.
Growing up, I'm more of a physical learn like a physical
learner. Like I have to show you, if you
show me what to do, I will do it95% of the time done correctly.
Other than that, if you tell me what to do, my husband's the
(27:54):
same out the window. It's it's out the window.
It's not, it's not gonna you're.A visual, physical learner.
Yes, my husband's the same. Yeah.
If you had paperwork in front ofyou that visually had like
pictures of what to do as opposed to words of do this, do
that, that's interesting. The pictures would assist you
more than the words would. The yeah, the pictures would
(28:16):
probably assist me more, but if you show me how to do it, I
would. It's gonna stay in my brain for
a long time. Which is what?
I did. Yeah, tactile learning.
Yeah, which is, which is one of the reasons why.
I mean he is a good bottom now so.
(28:36):
Which is why I scored the best percentile for getting my
forklift certification. Cuz you're visual.
Cuz I'm no, cuz I've had it. I've done it before.
Of course it was during. It was at a company that didn't
really care about. Regulations or policies?
(28:58):
Safety, Safety. It's.
Here, go with that. Yeah, you.
Didn't really care. Yeah.
And so you worked for No, never mind.
Don't. I'm not gonna name shame.
Don't name shame in the Lower Mainland here, there's many
companies out there. Could that could be fall fall
under that? Yeah, it's frightening.
(29:19):
Description sadly. So.
And I work in the trucking industry, so.
It's bottom line. I'm a visual.
I'm a visual learner. You, you show me how to do it. 9
times out of 10 I'll do it correctly.
I can attest he is a very, very good visual learner.
He abides to instruction really well.
(29:43):
Good to know. That that answers like what I
get a. Few drinks.
If you get a few drinks of me, I'll definitely learn it.
Looks. Like 123.
He's good to go. Before that one, no, no, you
got. Right, so you're ready to learn.
No, you got to count before. You got to count before that.
So you're ready to learn. 9 times out of 10 you might not
(30:03):
even need that, you just need toget him in the right mood.
All right, so you're ready to learn.
He's ready to learn Rough. As long as I can call in the
next day off work. Oh yeah, This is why I'm.
Usually that. This is why my birthday is the
day. At the time.
The next the next day, it's after work.
Yeah. We've that's why.
Fly trying to. Where's our swatter space here
(30:25):
so. We left it outside.
I believe you left it outside. Damn it.
All right, I have to go. I I have to go eat.
I don't leave the table, no. No.
Well, I have to, no. No.
There's a there's a thing at thebottom.
Does that mean nobody's being recorded?
Well, it's either that or it's gonna get or we're gonna be
experiencing yellow pup syndromereal fast.
OK, let him go. I mean, I could always.
(30:46):
Do not the first time. Don't.
Just don't. Turn yourself down.
I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna turn your microphone down.
Just now he's laid his headphones on to the soundboard
and probably muted all of us. Yeah.
No, you're fine. We're good now.
Nothing is recorded on. That's the solution.
So here's the deep dark secret about Spider that is not a
(31:11):
replica of his penis, no. Whose is it?
Some guy in the UK Billy Billy ball bags.
Yeah, some rather. What a wonderful name his
parents must be, so I. Believe that's his website his.
Website. Yeah, he makes.
Those or. Penis bottle toppers and.
I'm. I mean this is.
(31:31):
Hilarious was I? Was I drunk for that one time
though? Yes, for that.
Which? I wasn't there, but yes, if you
have to ask, you were. All times.
In my experience, if you have toask if you were drunk for.
It maybe you were not not fully drunk, but.
Beverages were. Ingested.
You may have had a couple. Sobriety wasn't a thing if you
(31:54):
have to ask moral of that story,I agree.
But there was also consent, 100%consent.
Consent was always given. That's.
Important however, if you have to ask, sobriety was not there.
That's in my experience. As somebody with the with the
ADHD's, no. If I can't remember something,
it's just 'cause I can't remember it.
I could be completely sober and I will still forget shit.
(32:17):
So no. No, unfortunately.
That is my experience. So no, I'm trying to remember
the time that Spider taught me. Oh yeah, you were time.
You were definitely intoxicated that night.
It it. See the great thing about J Rod
is that when he gets intoxicated, he becomes
(32:39):
extremely flirty 9 times out of 10.
Who doesn't over the few times that you know, we have
experienced each other tonsil hockey.
Yeah, J Rod is the one that makes moves.
He's the one that gets all the frisky and the kinky going on.
(32:59):
Honestly, looking at that face, I can see it.
Yeah, right. That makes sense.
That checks out. So even though he may be
intoxicated and fully consensual, he's the one that
brings it on and starts it. I blame it all on him.
That's fair, I get that a lot. Yeah, I can see why.
I'm happy with the flirty bottomwhen they're drunk.
(33:21):
That you're just more fun that way.
As long as you got Lube, you're fine.
I always pack Lube right? We all do.
I don't even know. How you don't carry Lube?
No, I use other methods. What Cresco?
(33:43):
My tongue and spit and lots of work.
Oh my God that dries out so quick.
Yeah, no, honey, they're they'rethey're.
I do it well. They're force good involved.
We're getting the new bell. OK, you know what?
I'm going to have to teach you alittle trick off air.
Please do. That you're going to have to.
Train me, Train me. Actually, you could probably
(34:06):
reach it. So I have my little behind you
on on my check out YouTube channel.
See my new Kids on the Block Bagepisode 50 Bag.
For yes, helpful tips. Right.
Apparently what happened to afterwards and off air.
It's a whole new channel now. Purell.
(34:28):
Purell not it's not. Purell.
It's a Purell bottle. There you go.
I feel like Purell is not the answer.
No, no. No, no.
Millennium is apparently. So the travel bottle of Purell
is Lube. You buy it.
Oh, I have a travel bottle of Lube too.
I just prefer to use my tongue for things.
Well, you can use your tongue for things, but it doesn't
(34:49):
always work for other things. No, no, you start with the
tongue for things. And the great thing about this
is to the Lube. So the Lube that Spider and I
use. I can assess to that.
Cannot stay in a bottle. Every single container that
we've ever purchased in the past, it leaks through every
single one of them. But these little Purell bottles,
(35:12):
these travel bottles, it has never leaked.
OK, so I have a story about that.
Just to make sure you remember that the Purell bottle you know
you've replaced with Lube because there was a few weeks
ago. Did you use the wrong bottle?
Yes. Did you sanitize somebody?
(35:32):
'S yes I did me. No, underneath he he sanitized.
Himself, I sanitized myself. At least you were a clean boy.
I was definitely clean, so I took the label off of my when I.
Turn it from a sanitary bottle into.
(35:53):
A. Yeah, instant automatically like
instant. Regret.
Damn I regret, yet I felt ultimately clean after that.
I mean, your soul was cleansed. It was better than any baptism
could ever do. Your soul was cleansed, Yeah.
Yeah, I was campus. Yeah.
I was like, oh wow. Was so cleansed that Jesus felt
(36:17):
it, Yeah. He sure.
Did. Yeah.
Yeah, that was yeah. That was.
That was. Damn, that was.
Experience, yeah. Eye opening.
Yeah, it was. It was that is.
Or maybe eye puckering. Yeah, puckering more so.
Feel like eye bulging like you're making a pop out because
that seems like a moment. Yeah.
(36:39):
You don't want. Your third eye it just.
Happened. It was definitely, it definitely
made the moment rather unique. I'm like, all right, I got, I
got to run. I'll be right back.
See, the great thing about it isis it was discovered before he
inserted to a different person. Yeah, thank goodness.
Could you imagine bottoming with?
(37:01):
Sanitizer. Wait, wait, there's questions.
Wait. So you used it on yourself, but
you were the top. No, I was bottoming so like.
I thought you said before I already top somebody else.
You told me you used it on Big John.
No, no, I used it on. I was bottoming.
For the record, Big John is justhilarious as a name.
Yeah, No, no, no further comments required.
(37:22):
Continue the story. Thank you.
You sanitized your rosebud, Yes.Oh.
Well, that sounds like an awful life choice.
Like bad life, decisions were made all around that day.
It really was. Yeah, so you weren't at the
bottom anymore, you were the top.
Yeah. Hopefully he's versed.
Yeah. Right.
Remember boys and girls to properly label all of your
(37:46):
containers to avoid such problems as.
Absolutely as that, yes. Keep seeing if he just used his
tongue as his bit that wouldn't have happened out of.
The. Bedroom Keep your hand sanitizer
away from your Lube. Keep your hand sanitized, not
your asshole. Yeah, re label your.
Lube. Oh my God that's BA from next
door. Bleached asshole.
(38:07):
Oh bleached asshole so. So our our neighbor got a
inflatable hot tub like we used to have.
And she, it was her first time. She threw her chemicals into it
and everything else. Yeah, we got a message from her
like a little while later. She's like, I think I did
(38:27):
something wrong, got into the hot tub and everything's fucking
burning. That's the wrong choice.
Yeah. So we're like, what did you use?
Pure bleach. Not even water, just a tub full
of bleach. Yeah, chlorine, way more than
she needed for this small littlehot tub like and and what we
used was bromine. Yeah, bromine for spas and and
(38:49):
you know, yeah chlorine for she burn is for pools for for
spools. Only you had googled that.
She used chlorine. Only so simple to find the
answer. But she probably used a puck the
size that, yeah, swimming pool. Yes, yeah, it was a lot.
So again, if only you had googled the thing, yeah.
So she informed us that things were burning and that she had
used chlorine. And we're like, well, that's
(39:12):
your first. You just dipped yourself into a
pool of bleach. Now you have a bleached asshole.
She's like, well, it feels like it.
She burned the pigment off her asshole.
Yep. So.
It burns when I pee. Spider Nope it just burns
generally cuz you use bleach on your whole body.
It got better. Well, that's so.
(39:33):
No, no, the story got better. That means it got worse.
Yep, it was done from here. The ironically funny part about
it is. Is that Shari's or boyfriend
Peter? Basically has been.
Companion is black so we pissed ourselves laughing for like when
(39:54):
we woke up when when she told usI'm like well that's great when
he got into the tub as he bleached halfway down so he's
like black from the top up and white from the bottom down and
she fucking like because all I see is Peter being bleached
halfway down and she. Died laughing and it was months
(40:15):
later. I'm all thinking of it doesn't
matter if you're black. Or yeah, yeah, right.
I'm like all I saw was like halfand half.
All right, feed of mind of Jackson.
Yeah, it was away. From the waist.
Down it was, it was so funny. Yeah, it was so much funny.
And then months later we were atAI think we were in Portland, we
were travelling and we walked into a sex door and we actually
saw a little packet of anal bleach.
(40:38):
You could do anal. You ever seen those?
It's. Yeah, some.
Some. Women.
Some women. Actually.
And they bleach the hair on. Their.
Ass Yeah, they bleach. All the body issues I could
have, that is not the one I wantto.
Do shaving. They would bleach it.
They bleach it. Not just women, a lot of men do
it. Too, Of all the body image
issues I could have, the color of my asshole is not on the
list, no. So, but you can.
(40:58):
So we saw the other things I canworry about.
We saw this little packet. Or a porn star.
At Bare paddle I am. There you go.
So we saw this little packet of anal bleaching and obviously we
took a picture of it and sent itto, you know, Sherry right away.
So I'm like, well, the rest of your, your rest of your, your
rest of your husband is bleached.
Do we need his asshole bleached too?
I mean, if it's on the waist down, no.
(41:19):
Yeah, we were like, we can bringthis back for you if you wanted.
The rest of him white too. And she just fucking died.
So shout out to our neighbor bleached asshole Sherry.
I haven't seen you in a while, lady.
I miss you. Yeah.
Yeah, it was a good, it was a good funny story, people.
For laughing at those jokes. What's?
That, but that's what she gets for.
(41:40):
People for laughing at those jokes.
That's what she gets for drivingan Audi.
You know what I mean? It happens.
It was a fun story. It was a lot of fun.
Good, good times. I.
Love her is. It an Audi or an Audi is that?
No, it's an innie. Male.
That's me. Yeah, So that's a that's a
story. I have our our wonderful next
(42:02):
door neighbors who are fantasticpeople as.
Well, that's how, yeah, that's how are.
They're very sanitized assholes.Yeah, they're very Peter has a
very sanitized asshole. They both do as they definitely
do on on loan like next week or our next door neighbors.
We told the story after the podcast.
I was designated a a golden retriever puppy.
I don't think Juky heard this one.
(42:23):
We were outside 2 days ago. Our next door neighbor's dog,
the golden retriever. Barely.
He's been really chewing his foot, so he has a cone of shame
on. Oh dear.
So a cone of shame. Not just his foot that he was
been chewing on to the point where there's no fur?
No, from his foot. Apparently he's been chewing on
his balls as well. Yeah, poor.
Buddy so no fur. So he comes out, he's got the
(42:44):
cone of shame. He comes out and he's running
around and then our next door neighbor Aaron, she she, she
yells out. She's like cuz it's always known
that I their dog whenever he sees me and he gets near me and
I give him the belly rubs he always loses his shit and just
pees everywhere. Oh my God, I've I've been peed
on. It's just this thing, I get
(43:05):
excited, I'm going to pee. And then Aaron yelled out.
She's like, oh, do you get when you get excited, you pee all
over the place too. That was that was that was after
we sometimes that we had the episode of which dog breed are
you right, right, right. And he was determined to be the
golden retriever. Yeah.
So. Erin, she, she played on that
one like well played on her part.
(43:26):
She's like, she said that for sure.
And I responded, I'm like, well,maybe sometimes she's like, I'm
sorry, I had to say it. I'm like.
If they asked nicely. Yeah, but I know, right?
But it was a. It was a.
Fun. And of course I yelled from the
car. Not wrong.
So it's, it's fun that we have such amazing neighbors, right?
And they're part of our life, and they know our life.
(43:48):
Shout out to the Zacunas. Yeah, they're like.
They are awesome. They're, yeah, they're we're so
blessed to our neighbors. That's their last name.
Zacuna. Yeah, they're Croatian.
Croatian. That's a crazy last.
Name. Yeah, there's like an upside
down V. Or there's some words,
something. On a letter.
That's cool though. We're blessed that they are our
neighbors and we've watched their kids grow up a long time
(44:10):
and yeah, we're very blessed. OK oldest son fucked me up
yesterday driving. So proud of him.
So he went in to get his learners his learner's permit
and passed both his learners andhis motorcycle learners at the
same time. Passed both of them.
(44:32):
So good for you kid. Like amazing.
Just recently passed with flyingcolors and got his N.
Nice. Hey, yeah, that's awesome.
Yeah, they're smart kids. Way to go kid.
Yeah, so yesterday Luca comes driving up in the family van
with Marco in the passenger seat, and mom and dad are in the
(44:56):
house. Oh yeah, that fucked me up.
Yeah, because. We met them when they were like,
we've been here for 13 years. We've been here for 13 years.
They moved in about a year afterus.
Yeah, but so. Wow.
Yeah. Luca is 17 I believe. 1718 well
(45:18):
it. Would have to because.
Mark Marco just graduated, I believe he just, he just went
from middle school to high school.
So he just, he just finished grade 8.
Starting grade 9 this September is Marco Luca I believe is
starting grade 12. When we met these kids, Marco, I
(45:39):
think wasn't even in just in kindergarten.
Wow, J Rod. They were wee little lads.
They, well, I mean, yeah, they were.
Oh, you watched them grow up. We.
We. Literally, we little Croatian.
Menaces on the road. OK, so one of the best stories
I've ever had. And now he's grown up.
Yeah, and he's. Driving.
He's grown up. That's awesome.
(45:59):
By himself, yeah. I, I, I think that hubby, I know
we, he's never forgotten it, butwe went on vacation.
We went home. Mark or Marco, Marco was the
youngest one was very young. And we went, we went on vacation
and we, when we came back, we had only known for a few years.
(46:20):
But when they came back in there, when he was in the Elegas
elementary school, he had to a project.
So we came back and in our mailbox there was a little
certificate, which I still have.And it said choose a safe
person, like a safe neighbor or warder Luca.
What's that? It was.
(46:40):
Was that Marco or I? I thought it was Luca.
It was Marco. Yeah, Marco was it, and he had
to choose it. So we came back in a little
certificate and said blah, blah,blah.
Like my safe, my safe neighbor is Paul, so and he put it in the
mailboxes like I feel safe with Paul and like he had a little
certificate he made-up and like,yeah, my safe neighbor, if I
felt anything wrong, was Paul. So yeah, that was like the
(47:02):
absolutely fucking heart wrenching.
There were two wonderful things that happened that was really
sweet to come back to that certificate.
It wasn't just on that certificate, as far as the
school knew, if anything happened to their parents.
You were the. Emergency.
I was the emergency contact. Spider had authorization to
collect them from school. Or they put their they put my
(47:25):
name down. I was authorized to pick them
up. That's amazing.
Isn't that amazing? The.
Funny thing about it is or the the even more heart warming
thing about it is, is they didn't even like, you know, say
hey, can we use you as did Marcodid this on his.
On his own. And then his parents found out
afterwards. And then, you know, the, the
(47:47):
little certificate was left in our mailbox.
Spider was like almost in tears with this.
And then when we talked to the parents, they're like, oh, yeah,
we forgot to ask you. Is it OK if you're, you know,
like, oh. By the way.
Agency contact, yeah. And we're like, yeah.
I mean, how'd you say no to thatthough?
Yeah, absolutely. You couldn't and you can't.
(48:08):
Yeah. And one other event that I chose
you especially when. They do it.
That way, Yeah. And that they they chose us,
that they knew they were a safe neighborhood and, you know, they
were people. And again, we were blessed.
And one other thing that really amazingly happened, I'm sure
we've mentioned on the show, butyou've never heard it was that
there was. We have our groundskeeping crew
that they hired. It was a couple of years ago and
(48:30):
we have the pride flag. We know we have the Canadian
pride flag proudly displayed over it.
And we have the Jeep and everything.
And I came back one day and thenthere was a little sticky note
from an employee that worked with that crew and it was
stuffed in the windshield. And it said I was along the
words of you know what, I'm really, really amazed or.
(48:54):
Or no, no, that wasn't from the groundskeeper.
Yeah, it was. It was from the groundskeeper
crew. It was from the crew.
It was a company that they hire from the groundskeeping crew.
That left you the note that saidthey were so proud to see you
and it made them feel more like themselves.
Yeah, that was written by like, the handwriting on that note was
from a 12 or 13 year old. That was it, one of the kids in
(49:18):
the complex. No, it was.
It was from one of the kids thatworked there.
It wasn't the groundskeeper. We'll discuss this afterwards.
I think there maybe there was 2 notes because I know there was 1
from 1 of the neighborhood kids not that long ago.
Yeah, yeah, That said before they moved in.
Here, that's sitting on your fridge.
Didn't say they moved in. There's one sitting on.
Your fridge. It's on the fridge.
It literally doesn't say that it's on the fridge.
(49:40):
They kept it. Anyway, we'll figure it out.
TBD. Yes.
But it was it was really nice that they felt comfortable.
They saw the pride flag and it basically said that, you know,
it was really nice that they could be themselves.
And it was, it was someone that was closeted that saw the pride
flag and the vehicles and it's amazing.
They just kind of like, you know, it empower them to feel
(50:02):
like they could be themselves. So it was.
That's what it should be. Yeah, exactly.
So amazing. That's wonderful.
I love. That it was nice to show.
And everyone comes and we're very proud.
You know, when everybody comes into our complex and they see
it, we have a pride flag up there.
We are. We are proud to be ourselves.
We don't hide. Yeah.
And we're, and we're not ashamedto be who we are.
Yep, and everyone's welcome in our place, right?
(50:25):
And if you're not, you know why.Yeah, no shit.
Yeah. You know what you did?
Yep. J Rod How are we looking on
time, buddy? Got about 5 minutes all right.
Share a show Sharon. Would you like there be silence
for 5 minutes? 5 minutes silence.
(50:48):
From those guys. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait a
minute. Wait a minute.
I got something to say. Shout out to Ozzy Osbourne.
Oh, rock God. Prince of Darkness.
Amazing. He's he's influenced a lot of
people, a lot of musicians. Much respect to him.
(51:11):
Oh yeah, he's done. I'm pretty sure the first Ozzy
Osbourne song I listened to was maybe Crazy Train or Iron Man.
Nice. Both great songs.
Both both great awesome songs tolisten to.
Yep, they are so. Condolences to the Osbourne
family. Good, good shot.
(51:33):
Much respect to Ozzy Osbourne for himself.
Absolutely he influenced. Just he, yeah, he influenced a
lot of musicians, yeah. On the bits and pieces we'll
miss. You Oz.
Well said. We'll miss you, Ozzy.
Absolutely, buddy. Prince of Darkness.
Oh fuck yeah he was. We love.
We love you, man. He was.
Awesome man. So we need a second secret word
(51:57):
for the stinky pups for this episode.
We do. On that note, today is July
27th. I want to do a shout out to my
sister who does not listen to the show but tomorrow is her
birthday. Happy birthday, sister.
Happy birthday. Happy birthday, sister.
Charmaine, Charmaine Charmaine Happy birthday Charmaine's
(52:18):
birthday, July 28th. She was born Black Friday in
Edmonton, so I believe that was 87.
So happy 25th. Wow. 38.
He's 87. 87 We don't age people.Right, I will age forever.
It's a good year. No no no.
I will age my family every chance I get.
(52:39):
Oh, is that one? And we're shouting them out
then. Yeah, no, my, my, my younger
sister is old, that's why. They'll talk a minute.
Yeah, we're about there. I know we're about to shut her
down to make sure we get on YouTube.
I I got another one. Happy birthday to my dad
celebrates his 70th. Wow, seven birthday.
(52:59):
J Rods. Damn, 70.
Good for you, buddy. Way to go, Papa.
Happy birthday. Happy birthday, Papa.
J Rod. That's great.
And my niece. Yeah, you should be proud.
My niece Taylor is about to haveher second child within the next
couple weeks. I believe she was 38 weeks her
last posting and she's like she wants a baby out.
(53:21):
Yeah, I don't. I can't say I blame her.
Grand nephew? Yep.
I get topped out with that boy. Nice.
So I get topped. I have shit out right away.
I have a great niece and a greatnephew coming.
Amazing. I'm a great uncle times 3.
Oh, and the Gray hairs are perfectly showing.
It's perfect. Die so I can't.
(53:43):
See them from here either. Time, hair or the partner don't
worry, they're. There I know so the.
Secret word. There's.
The stinky pups is going to be. Aussie, we're about to run out.
Aussie, Aussie, Aussie. Aussie is.
That's a great word. Aussie it is, say everybody,
then we gotta shut her down or. Love peas and chicken graze who
all listen to you or you can listen to us next time.
(54:05):
After the pride, after pride, evil love you right?
That was aggressive. That was excessive.
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