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September 29, 2022 22 mins

If you've ever been in an abusive marriage, then you have struggled with the question of whether you should remain in the marriage or leave. If you are a Christian woman, the inner battle is far more intense. We have often been admonished as to how "God hates divorce." We've been given all sorts of victim-blaming and shaming advice. And, of course, we want to keep our marriages intact. Perhaps we even still have love and compassion for our husbands. The confusion is overwhelming. 

I found myself in this dilemma. Many had told me to stay. Many had given me advice that was ineffective at best, and dangerous at its worst. My situation worsened, and though I still loved my husband my need for peace, freedom, and normalcy increased. Eventually, after crying out to God, I was given advice that was practical, biblical and wise, from a former pastor of mine.

What this pastor shared with me was the answer that I had pleaded for. Not only did this pastor tell me that I was free to leave but he also urged me to do so. He explained that, in his experience, these marriages rarely changed for the better. He further explained that when they did, on those rare occasions, there were certain indicators present. These indicators were strong signs of a heart willing and able for change.

I've shared these criteria with countless women, and now I want to share this wisdom with YOU!

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