Wayne | S1 Ep7 Part2 "It'll Last Forever" - The Tedcast - A Deep Dive Podcast About The Bear

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:22):
Welcome to our Ted Lasso talk, the Tedcast.
Welcome all Greyhound fans,welcome all you sinners from the
dog track and all the AFCRichmond fans around the world.
It's the lasso way around theseparts with Coach, coach and
Boss, without further ado, coachCastleton.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
You develop your Netflix special Like I would pro
bono, beyond the writing staff,because that line I mean, like
what kind of thing is that tosay?
That's the only thing I wouldsay again.

Speaker 3 (01:00):
I said the only thing I've ever been responsible for
in my life.
I killed on purpose.
She was a dog.
It was time.
Come on, this was like legal.
The vet did it and knew whatwas happening?

Speaker 2 (01:12):
Tell me you can hear that in like a promo reel for
some upcoming Netflix comedyspecial.
Tell me right now you can hearthat right now.

Speaker 3 (01:23):
I'm just saying I shouldn't be responsible for
something that is going tooutlive me.

Speaker 2 (01:27):
This is about me having children.

Speaker 3 (01:28):
I shouldn't.
I want the doctor to set myuterus on fire.
It's the most badass thing Icould think of.
Fuck you eggs, Burn down yourhouse.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Fuck you eggs.

Speaker 3 (01:40):
And that's actually like a real that's a legit fuck
you.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
according to Alabama Like who knows, maybe the eggs
will say fuck you back.
That's mass murder.

Speaker 2 (01:49):
Pick it.
I don't know who the fuck knows.
I don't even understand.
I don't understand any of thisanymore.

Speaker 4 (01:53):
Listen, in the world of eggs, one thing you don't
wake up every day as an eggthinking is shit's going to burn
in here, like that, yeah.
That is one thing that is very,very deep down the list.

Speaker 3 (02:06):
I'm about to be sunny side up like a motherfucker.
Yeah, yeah, I mean actually.
Yeah, you know what, now that Ithink about it, that is the way
that most eggs end up.
Well, maybe not most.
All of the eggs that I've comeinto contact with eventually end
up in a pan of some sort.

Speaker 2 (02:24):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (02:26):
Yeah, Something to think about Also.
My eggs have to be dead.
Just like my age and generalhealth.
They can't be viable anymore.

Speaker 4 (02:36):
So, fingers crossed, I feel like your eggs might
still be viable in a way likewhere it's like they're wearing
a leather jacket and smoking andyou're like it's like a Keith
Richards kind of viability.

Speaker 3 (02:49):
You know, like oh, the ones that are left are the
Ozzy Osbourne where they hadsuch a high tolerance for drugs,
that it could get them.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can test that theory theydown there smoke a little
microscopic cigarettes andjoints and shit.

Speaker 4 (03:06):
Yeah, yep, yeah, and complaining about the quality,
this is all we have.
Are you serious?
You know she's up there gettingthe good shit and we get this
trickle down horse, horse, crap.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
Yeah, now I'm thinking, maybe I could get a
scientist to cut my ovaries out,put them in different levels of
drugs and see what they do.
All right, yeah, like one instraight vodka whiskey.
Actually, let's get real.
Yeah.
They prefer whiskey and anotherone in like a.
It would need to be harderdrugs.
I feel like nobody's everoverdosed on mushrooms.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
No.
I don't have a bad trip but Idon't think we can open up
something.
No, it's actually allpsychedelics.
They scare the shit out of us,but they ain't going to kill you
.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (03:52):
You might be people.

Speaker 3 (03:53):
And sometimes, sometimes some people I've heard
I'm not naming names, butsometimes people take a small
amount of mushrooms and thenwatch last week tonight with
John Oliver until he gets soshiny that you have to put him
away for a little bit and watchhim in the morning.
Theoretically that could happen.

Speaker 2 (04:16):
Theoretically that might happen to one.

Speaker 4 (04:20):
Got it Well, welcome everybody.
Yeah, oh, I know You're goingto say, hey, coach, this is
supposed to be a show where youtalk about other shows and I
have no regrets, no ragged ratsright now, because I blow my one
ragged rat is.
We did not, I did not clickrecord early enough because this
started out crazy and thenstayed crazy, and I hope we're

(04:43):
going to bring that energy intothe show today.
I'm your host, coach Castleton.
With me, as always, is coachBishop.

Speaker 2 (04:50):
Is it possible to say you've derailed if you were
never on the rails Like westarted off the rails?
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (04:57):
It's very liberating.
And then with us back from thewars is our boss, emily Chambers
, who, I might add, you know,got us really scared with this
side pain thing and coach wasreally concerned and I told her

(05:20):
to have her boyfriend, you know,I said, hey, I'm just kicking
the side, wicked had break upthem, kidney stones there, guy.
But it's just like, not, I'mgoing to, I'm going to, I'm
going to go, and it's not greatmedical advice, that's a bust
and but.

(05:40):
But it turns out Emily is, is aokay and everyone can breathe a
sigh of relief because she'sback with us today and she is
attributed it to just just a,just a little little fainting
spell.
You know, little littleVictorian Misting, is that right

(06:01):
, boss?

Speaker 3 (06:02):
I think what it was is that my ovary was trying to
punch an egg out.
This is all fucking free.
Menopause is the worst it will,especially for me, because I'm
it's so close to the end, Ican't wait.
But like it's so far away stillin, my periods are getting
worse.
Actually, wait real quick.
Speaking about the boyfriend, Iwas really annoyed yesterday at

(06:27):
with some shit at work.
I was like my fucking boardboss.
It's just a different mindset.
But he likes to have like a lotof documentation, a lot of
optimization and maximizing shit.
He wants to have a record ofwhat we did and when it was done
and then we could compare it tothe benchmarks.
And this is what his level does, like this level of middle

(06:49):
manager like does this shit?
That's fine, I don't want to doany of that shit.
I want to do none of it.
I want to do my job and thenthat's it and then I'm finished.
So I was complaining to theboyfriend about how annoying
this was, because just let mesit with my spreadsheets and not
talk to anybody.
That's why I take this job,that's why I do it.
And he said yeah, I've got anannoying guy at work too, that

(07:11):
every week that we're gettingpaid, he makes sure to walk
around to everybody.
Hey, it's payday Friday.
He's that guy Wow.
I was like yeah, I was like thatsucks.
I was like how do you handlethat?
And he was like every time hesays it I shout spoilers at him.

Speaker 4 (07:29):
That's funny, that's funny.

Speaker 3 (07:31):
I was like oh, that's what millennials do.
Boomers do this shit.
Millennials, fucking troll.
Millennials are like I'm notgoing to acknowledge.
Spoilers oh my.

Speaker 4 (07:41):
God Jesus, Holy shit, dude.
Is that guy named Mark?
Maybe Mark's and Weiner's?
What's your thesis on this boss?

Speaker 3 (07:57):
Mark's and Weiner's is my thesis.
I'm sorry to anybody out therenamed Mark, you're probably
lovely.
There have to be some good ones.

Speaker 4 (08:05):
Boss is in search of a good mark.
But she has this thing wherethe funny part of this is one of
the things that came up beforethe show All Mark's and Weiner's
.
And then Craig says to her wait, was your dad named Mark?
Yes, he was.

Speaker 3 (08:17):
I already think I got how do you think I figured that
out?
This is how I do this.

Speaker 2 (08:22):
Wow, I stepped away for that part.
They're so messed up, sweetbuttercups.
I just got hit right betweenthe eyes with that, just like
you in real time.
Boy oh boy.
This place takes some darkturns, man, some dark turns on
this journey.

Speaker 3 (08:40):
Yeah, obviously.
And also I dated a guy incollege named Mark.
I'm trying to think of someothers, but the guy that says
hey, payday, Friday, pay week,his name is Mark.
I'm sure that there are somehorrible Emily's out there also.

Speaker 4 (08:57):
I would totally high five that guy and then look back
at my friends.
I would make sure he said itevery.
I'd make sure that the paydayFriday train kept on trucking.
I'd be like woo thanks, mark.
Yeah, you know what I mean Justto make my friends in the
office.

(09:18):
I would want their insights toseize up.

Speaker 3 (09:22):
I don't understand why you would hate them like
that.
I will say that on a podcastthat I listened to one time,
somebody wrote in and said thattheir boss had somehow gotten
confused about the meaning ofthis phrase and at work, when he
was angry, when he wanted toexpress his displeasure at
something which say, if thatcopier breaks again, I'm going

(09:47):
to bust a nut, and the guyfollows oh, I'm sorry, I'm like
do you know what he wanted toknow, how he could gently
explain to his boss you're usingthat phrase wrong.
And the host said oh, you tellhim nothing because you're
robbing somebody in the futureof getting to experience their
boss Exactly.

(10:07):
Yeah, mine do so you have okay,but having your boss
inadvertently say I'm going tobust a nut in the middle of the
office is so much better, yes,than saying pay week, hey, hey,
hey.
Payday Friday.

Speaker 4 (10:23):
No, that's also amazing.
Looks like somebody's got apage on the Monday's boss.

Speaker 3 (10:29):
Oh, god damn it.
I was in such a good mode for asecond.

Speaker 4 (10:35):
It's all gone, I wish we could work together nine to
five boss.
You'd have a long you'd be.
So how long before I run youout of dodge?
How long?

Speaker 3 (10:44):
Oh, I don't work to nine to five.
I mean, like technically I'msupposed to, actually I guess
it's like eight to five, but Ijust I do it.
When I do it, if I have to gointo the office, I include my
travel time.
I'm like fuck you guys, you'refucking paying me.
It wouldn't last that long.

Speaker 4 (11:04):
I just had this image of me filling your office with
balloons you know how they dothat with people and then you
not smiling and pulling out ataser and like frying the
balloons to get to your desksilently and everyone just
watching you going like is she?
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (11:23):
Jokes on you.
I don't have an office.
I've got a cubicle.
Good luck keeping the balloonsin those.
So I don't.
Cubicles are nice I mean likefor like.

Speaker 4 (11:32):
if you're talking about just like being happy,
like a being happy kind of place, being in a cubicle, it really
does.
I've had more than my share ofcubicles Coming up coming up on
my way up the ladder and andyeah, it's a.

Speaker 2 (11:49):
I was sharing before we got on here.
I know folks are going to findthis shocking, but I don't work
out in jobs and and like sittingme in a cubicle like that's a
war crime, like looking back nowI'm like that is so fucking
wrong, like it felt wrong evenbefore I understood why it was

(12:11):
so wrong, but like I would feellike I was going to lose my mind
eventually.
Like I like I remember that onejob in particular.
I liked the people.
The work was easy enough.
I was selling like SAT,tutoring, shit like that.
Like who cares?
It was fine.
You call around mostly speak toa bunch of moms who were bored

(12:32):
or about to head out to pick uptheir kids or whatever.
Like they're fine.
And I still was like I'm goingto kill myself and or the rest
of humanity if this doesn't stop.
So it's always very interestingto be the people who can make
it through that, because it itwas horrible.

Speaker 4 (12:53):
I don't know how you.
I think it's like waterboardingcubicles.

Speaker 2 (12:58):
It's like that level of like torture.

Speaker 4 (13:01):
See, I don't mind cubicles as much as I'd like
private.
I'm like I'd rather you don'tlook at me, I'd rather you know
whatever.
What I don't like is my back,Like I'm the kind of person that
if I go to a restaurant I sitwith my back.
I want to see like, like everyday in my life is like a mafia
hit, waiting to happen?

Speaker 2 (13:18):
Yeah, 100%, and so definitely we'll adjust.
If we go into a restaurant andshe's led to the seat that's
facing the door, she will like,with no words said, my kids too,
will adjust the seatingarrangement so that I can be in
my proper position.
Yeah, watching the door so Ican see my killer's approach.

Speaker 4 (13:38):
But when you have children that have the same
malady, then you end up in ChuckE Cheese with six of you on one
side of the same Like cleaningyour weapons.
But the kids will be like dad,come on, can I get one meal
where I'm not fully exposed?
I'm like, well, fine, that'sfine, I'll sit up.

(14:01):
You guys got to call it out.
You see, anything you got tocall it out.

Speaker 2 (14:05):
That's funny because that's when I will relax and sit
with my back Certain people who, I believe, have that gene I
will sit with my back.
If I went to eat with boss, Iwould sit with my back to the
door with such comfort, withsuch peace in my soul, because I
would know that before I evenwould have reacted, that they

(14:27):
would already be dead and we'dbe making a call to the blood
guy.
So I just like oh, yes.
Yeah, that would be no problem,no problem.

Speaker 3 (14:36):
I love so much that you believe that because I was
just going to say she wouldserve you off boy she would
serve.
No, I wouldn't serve you up.
She's the one that hired theperson I'm not paying for.
That that's frigging ridiculous.
I love it.
That's the issue.
It's just fiscallyirresponsible.

Speaker 4 (14:54):
What are we talking about now.

Speaker 3 (14:57):
No listen for those of you outside of the US, it is
currently tax time.
Our system is so fucked up weare legally sorry.
Tax preparers are legallyrequired to offer one service,
one free service, to anyone whois filing the simplest of simple
tax forms, which in our case isjust the 1040.

(15:19):
If you do that, they're notgoing to charge you anything.
If you have a health savingsaccount, which is supposed to be
a fix to our incrediblyhorrible medical insurance
system, where you get to usepre-tax dollars for your medical
things, then you have to file asecond form.
Then H&R Block tries to chargeyou $60.

(15:40):
Now my actual plan is that I'mgoing to walk to the library and
pick up a paper copy of a taxreturn and fill that out and put
it into the mail and send thatto the government, because I
would rather do that.
I would rather get pregnant andbirth a child and then hand that

(16:03):
child over to H&R Block beforeI will give them 60 of my
dollars to file this shit.
It's so fucking wild to me thatI need to pay money for that.
So no, I wouldn't hire somebodyto kill you, I'd kill you
myself.
But the larger point is that Ihave such a wild disregard.
Thank you, thanks.
I appreciate that I have a wilddisregard for my own personal

(16:26):
health and safety, that it'snever occurred to me in my life
that somebody wants to kill me.
I've never been on the outletfor that.

Speaker 4 (16:37):
Oh, that's so funny.
I thought you were going to sayI have such a wild disregard
that it's crazy to me that youwould put your life in my hands
because I'm not paying attentionto that Again.

Speaker 3 (16:47):
I leave my back door open when I go to the store,
Please stop saying that I don'tthink.
I'm allowed to talk like thatat work.
I leave the back door ajar.

Speaker 2 (17:00):
Better?
I'm pretty sure it's not, butI'll let him answer for himself.

Speaker 4 (17:05):
All right.
Well, today, everybody we areAren't you so glad I came back
we are yeah, with a vengeance,with a vengeance.
Like the sun shining over thecemetery.
Are you caught up, boss?
Have you caught up?
Yes, okay, so we are going totalk about Wayne, episode seven.

(17:27):
This is part two.
The episode is entitled ChapterSeven.
It'll last forever.
Coach and I brazenly gotthrough 20 minutes to zero of
the 32-minute episode, so todayis going to be a relatively
quick one, boss.

(17:50):
Overall feelings about theepisode.
How long ago did you see it?

Speaker 3 (17:56):
I watched it over the weekend and then rewatched it
just this morning, so it's alittle bit fresh.
It's a good episode.
I like it.
I mean we haven't had a badepisode yet.
I'm a little bit angry, though,that if you got to the
20-minute mark, you alreadytalked about what's the space?
Who knocked out the girl?

Speaker 4 (18:14):
Brendan Bradley, bradley, yeah, no, bradley, yeah
, no, no Bradley.
He's still with us in thisscene.
Oh right, so you're catching usright at the middle end of the
Bradley part of the show.
Please talk to us about Bradley.

Speaker 3 (18:31):
I think Bradley sucks but also I love him as a
character.
I wouldn't want to know him inreal life, but on the show he
brings a little somethingBradley's handsome, oh my God, I
think he's got the mostbeautiful eyes.

Speaker 4 (18:47):
I'm telling you, I'm like that guy is so good.
He just looks like anall-American, corn-fed,
middle-american farm boy, notnecessarily this one I don't
care for any of that.
Yeah, yeah, right.
Well, that's why, before westarted, everybody we talked
about a coach that was talkingwith a friend who says oh, she

(19:09):
doesn't need no worry to meet anice guy.
And Boss said why do you wantto meet a nice guy?
For what?
As a mark.

Speaker 2 (19:16):
That's so funny as a mark.
That was when I took off myheadphones and went and took
care of what I had to do,because I was just like I just
need a moment with that, becausethat's the only possible reason
you would look for a niceperson as a mark.
That was so funny.

Speaker 3 (19:34):
I've got a list of things that I look for in men
and a nice voice.

Speaker 4 (19:41):
Stabilization, stability, a patina of two days
of sweat unwashed.
I want that appearance.

Speaker 3 (19:54):
I want him to be smart and I want him to be funny
, and then I want him to be hotin a weird way that I enjoy, and
then basically anything afterthat.
That's it.
That's all I care about.

Speaker 2 (20:05):
I'm with it.
I'm going to toss out the niceguy thing.
I actually, because I do suchthings, found myself googling
the etymology of nice guy'sfitness last.
It's not etymology, I guess, ifit's a phrase, but anyway the
history of it, and it was saidby a football coach, whatever

(20:31):
and I used to fight against thatphrase, like in my spirit.
I just hated that phrase ofnice guy's finish last, and
probably in the way it wasoriginally intended, I would
still fight it.
But I've been looking at my ownlife.
I'm actually serious about this.
I've been looking at my ownlife and going, yeah, a little

(20:53):
too much nice sometimes.
Now, sometimes not enough.
I will acknowledge that.
So nobody needs to come out inme for the things I've done in
life, because, yeah, there are afew of them.
But times when I'm like peoplea lot of people, please, and I
like someone will say somethingoff kilter, I've been watching
myself do it recently and you'regoing to have to figure out how

(21:15):
to check people more gently sothat you don't feel like, ooh, I
hate to have to take thisperson's head off.
So I'm going to let it go,because it also shouldn't go
unchecked.
But yeah, so the nice guy'sfinish.
Last thing I'm starting to comearound to difference between
nice and kind and too much nice.

(21:35):
That is why you finish last,because you're ignoring yourself
for whatever reason, and thenyou end up losing out.
Nice and kind aren't the samething.

Speaker 3 (21:49):
Yep, and I would argue even further that there's
a lot of times where peoplethink that they are because they
are nice.
Others shouldn't expect toomuch more of them, Like, oh,
we'll give them a break.
He's a nice guy, I'm like well,I don't want to give them a
break.
What I want him to do is bebetter at this.
And if he can't be better atthis, then he needs to figure

(22:11):
something else out.
And we're saying he, but thisapplies to all people Like yes,
being kind is good, of course.

Speaker 4 (22:17):
Yeah, not all.

Speaker 3 (22:19):
But if you are using nice as a crutch, you're not
going to do that well becausenobody's actually going to
respond well to that.
We don't want to have to treatyou differently because you are
nice.
We want you to deserve the waythat we treat you because you
are kind.

Speaker 2 (22:35):
I'm going to toss this in and then coach can tell
us why he hates everything we'vesaid for the last five minutes.
Yep absolutely.
But I'm going to throw this inOne of the things in my coaching
maybe think about it too is, inmy coaching, what I say to
people is we don't do positive,negative in sort of the classic
way.
So like somebody who would belike, oh, yelling at someone is
a negative way to communicate,like no, no, no.

(22:56):
In the context of the coaching,positive is moving you toward
the point, which is essentiallyhow we define where you want to
go, and negative is moving youaway from the point, and that's
it.
That's the whole definition ofpositive and negative.
And so they've been sometimeswhere I've been nice and ways

(23:17):
that were ultimately negative iswhat I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (23:24):
Oh, I absolutely agree with that, but I am also
waiting for Castleton 20.

Speaker 2 (23:27):
Oh yeah, he's coming in guns.
Oh no, no, no, here's the thing.

Speaker 4 (23:33):
I just feel like we've been recording for a few
years together.
Now it's been, you know, it'shad its moments, but mostly it's
trash.
And I will say that you shouldknow better than to just just
welcome boss back with open armswith that particular statement,

(23:57):
because it leads her down this.
She feels justified, she feelslike I'm winning over one of the
two fake nice guys on thispodcast I know nobody's actually
nice and so it's a matter ofjust accepting your, your primal
nature and stop pretending tobe nice.

(24:18):
It gives her an entree to pokefun of my, my dear friend and
movie star legend, matt Damon.
It just opens up every MattDamon talking point, and I don't
like when she's happy.

Speaker 2 (24:36):
I don't like when she's happy, that's nice guys
often do.

Speaker 3 (24:42):
They get upset when other people experience.
Yeah, that's it, that's it,that's great.
You've really.

Speaker 4 (24:48):
You've, really, you've really opened me up to a
whole other side of myself.
Boss, yeah, listen, I know whatyou're saying.
You don't want to.
This is a.
I look at it differently, I do.
I remember thinking I have afriend and we always talk about
how we're not provocable.
That's the word we use, andthat's because we don't do the

(25:11):
correction thing when weprobably should.
But again, a huge part of it,now that we've started this
podcast and been doing it for along time, a huge part of it is
privilege.
First of all, I have theprivilege of not reacting, which
I never saw as privilegedbefore, but it really is.
It's like oh, I have the option.
You know, some people justplain don't have the option.
I have the option.

(25:32):
So that's a big part of it.
The second thing is the me notwanting to make it us out of it,
and then the because I just Idon't want to be associated with
anybody that's going to be likethat.
And then the third thing is Idon't.
I think I don't like I know, Iknow you're saying, I know it's

(25:53):
funny because I understandcompletely.
A boss is saying and you'reright, there is a huge
difference between nice and kindcoach.
That's a.
It's a big.
They talk about this when theytalk about people from the East
Coast or people from the WestCoast.
Remember watching this nice butnot kind, which is the West
Coast, and East Coast is kindbut not nice.
Obviously you know hugerationalization, but but yeah,

(26:18):
no, no, I it bears there, it hasmerit.
I will say definitely that youhave to be able to stand your
ground in certain, in certainplaces, in certain times.
It's going to look verydifferent, for how that
manifests itself in yourindividual personality is going
to look wildly different.
So my sense is how boss wouldshow that in her personality,

(26:43):
how it would present to anoutsider would be very different
than how it might present foryou or me, coach, because we're
generally probably going to sandoff the corners of that
response to a large degree.
Just, boss doesn't care aboutthat.
She, she's glad if you getscratched on one of the corners.

Speaker 3 (27:04):
If it's called for.

Speaker 4 (27:05):
Yeah, if it's called for.
No.
No, I mean, listen, there's.

Speaker 2 (27:09):
Yeah, there's a lot to that, no you know we joke,
but I actually do feel like inthat way, jokes aside, boss, has
impacted me because thatability to just be plain I feel

(27:31):
like I've had over the years.
I have like I will rip yourhead off or I will put up with
an unbelievable level ofbullshit, like where even other
people in my life are like whatthe fuck man?
Like, how long are you gonnatake this?
So I appreciate about seriously, boss, and some of the things

(27:53):
that she's like even shared oradvised or seen in the shows
that it's like a thing happened.
This is my response to thatthing.
My response may bother you, myresponse may elate you, who
knows?
But this is my response and youdo what you need to do.

(28:14):
But that's my response and I doappreciate.
Yeah, I've spent a lot of timein my life.
How's this gonna land?
Oh, they're gonna think this.
So I don't want them to feelthat it's like, no, that's my
business anyway.
I can't control it anyway.

Speaker 4 (28:32):
Yeah, but coach, that is, in the last three years,
you've had like a quantum change.
First of all, you understood.
You had ADHD, which changedeverything.
Everything, like literally everysingle thing, about my life,
you still yeah, yeah, no, andthat allowed you to contemplate
and change and question.
But if we step back and we say,look, let's take anybody, it
doesn't matter about the threeof us, but you take, you step

(28:55):
back in your life and you say,okay, what is your view of
humanity, what is your view ofyour time on this planet?
Okay, my guess is boss wouldsay something along the lines of
like, she's more of a realist,right?
So she marches to the real.
She is not an idealist.
She says this is what it is.
It's a pit of, it's a mosh pitfull of animals, and I am an
animal in the mosh pit.

(29:16):
I have no problem labelingmyself in the way that doesn't
elevate me.
Like I'm just telling you I'mright here, I'm trying to do the
best I can, but like I'm notpulling string, I'm not a puppet
master above the mosh pit.
Coach, you and I would probablysay, okay, yes, we would agree
with all that, except we aremarching to the ideal.

(29:37):
We would like to go to thestairs and step up out of the
mosh pit, and so we holdourselves to the standard at the
top of the stairs and Boston's.
That's probably an absolutewaste of time.
It totally disregards realityand is unattainable, considering

(29:58):
there are no stairs.
So it's how you all, when youstep back and you look at these
things, you can put them inperspective, not?
I will also add the fact thatat a certain point in life, your
kids are mostly grown.
Coach, you hit 50, the amountof fucks that you have left to
give about like worrying aboutother people.

(30:20):
It really does, just it'sdwindling.
Yeah, yeah, yeah it really doestake a huge nosedive.
But, like when we talk aboutthose, we know we have a lot of
people that listen who have ADHDand we thank you.
We hope we jump around top isenough to keep that dope mean
crackle acting.
But one thing I'll say is theother day I was thinking about

(30:45):
when I was when I was a littlekid and I don't know as I
started dating and stuff and Iwas like, yeah, I started dating
pretty young, like I think,younger than the curve.
At the time I was like the firstof my friends to get
girlfriends and I was like had abunch of my dorky, we were dork
, we were nerds, so that was my.

(31:07):
That's how I identified as anerd.
And so if I kissed a girl, myfriends would huddle around and
be like, oh my God, like what?
So I was how do you?
You know what I mean.
It was like like I was unlockingmysteries in the universe and I
was telling coach that I hadthis realization that I, you
know, in my early teens Icheated on a lot of people, a

(31:29):
lot of girlfriends, and it mademe sick to my stomach and it
always made me sick in real timeand I never realized until like
last Wednesday I was like holyfuck, that was ADHD.
Like I would feel compelled andit was so nice to talk to coach
about it because, first of all,there was no judgment.

(31:49):
I'm sorry for anybody thathears this and doesn't have ADHD
and goes no, you're just ashithead.
That's what boss is making aface of right now, but it really
was like you'd be in a momentand you'd be, and you would be
like I don't know, it'd be likeyou would just be.
It felt like you were compelled.
It was so awful and I was likethis is not who I am.

(32:10):
I hate that I do this.
Why the fuck do I do this?
I was so mad at myself everytime Because I'm like like
loyalty is a huge tenet of mypersonality, always has been and
I go, what am I like?
And coach was saying that hehad a different situation, but
his experience was I'm so tiredof hurting people, mine was.

(32:30):
I'm so sorry to saying sorrybecause I didn't like to feel
like I had been the wrong.
I was the wronging party, I wasthe one that had made the error
and I was like I'm so fuckingsick of saying sorry because I
have to, because I'm the onethat did it.
Like if I just stopped doing it, I wouldn't have to fucking say
sorry, because I hated thatposition, knowing I had fucked

(32:51):
up.
I didn't like it and itcompletely did not compute with
me.
First of all, I didn't know Ihad ADHD until I was diagnosed
with 44, coach, how old were youwhen you got diagnosed?
48.
Yeah, 48.
But I look back and I'm like,oh my God, like it's like this.
It was a dopamine search and Iwas fighting against myself,
didn't have the tools to combatit, had no one in my life who

(33:14):
could make any sense of itwhatsoever, and so you just
imbued with shame and misery andself-loathing and you start to
build this picture of yourselfas no, I'm a cheater.
Like I am a cheater, likethat's who I am.
I'm not a good person.
I am not.
I lie to myself.
I have a belief system that isnot congruent with what my

(33:38):
actions are, and it is horribleand I don't know why.
I ported my brain back to thatage and it got better as I got
older, but it was still like itwas always there.
It was always like I've had ahard time fighting temptation, a
hard time always making theright choice.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
Impulse control.
Yeah, impulse control.
Wanting novel experiences, Imean it's just, it's set up,
it's just, especially if youdon't know that you're like
needing the lookout for that.

Speaker 4 (34:07):
Yeah, and coach was like when we were talking about
it it was like two friendswhispering, but I really wanted
to own it.
I really wanted to talk aboutit on the podcast because if
there's anybody out there thathad a similar experience, I just
didn't want you to feel like itwas just you, because it felt
horrible to me.
To this day, I feel terribleabout it and I'm not the.

(34:30):
I know that there's that thingwhere you get good at forgiving
yourself and whatever, and I'mstill not.
I'm just playing, not great atthat.
But if anybody else had asimilar experience or never, I
don't know why it took me solong to put it.
It should be obvious.
But I guess you just you getdiagnosed and then you start to
think like, okay, how can Iaddress this?

(34:52):
Because one of the things aboutADHD is now versus not now.
And so you're like, okay, well,now you know, let's deal with
it now.
There's a big issue.
Like I better deal with it now.
And then you start to go backand think about some of the
things that affected you in yourformative years and you start
to see like this invisible, it'slike a mage hand of ADHD just

(35:17):
gently nudging you towarddecisions that if you didn't
have that particular diagnosis,you may not have gone that
direction.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
So number one.
Thank you, coach, for sayingthat I made any impact.
Excuse me, sorry.
You're understanding anybody'sunderstanding.
Hey Castleton, you too, man, ifI impacted you at all.
That's wild to me, because I'mstill of the opinion that, not
that people don't notice me, butlike sometimes I'll run into

(35:49):
somebody, like a friend of afriend that I've met once or
twice before at a party orsomething, and I'm like, oh hey.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
I'm Emily and they're like yeah, I know you, I've met
you before.

Speaker 3 (35:57):
And I'm like I didn't realize you would remember me I
would have acted differentlybefore.
Okay, so that's first Numberone.
That actually means a lot.
Thank you, I think the onlything, not that you were wrong
about the pit with the animals,but only that what I would say
is I don't think it's bad thatpeople are animals in a pit,

(36:22):
like I think, especiallyrelating it to what you just
said about cheating and ADHD andwhat I would say is that people
self report that infidelity hasaffected or existed within
roughly half of marriages, andmaybe that's the same for
relationships and maybe that's,you know, whatever else, if it

(36:45):
is impacting half of thepopulation.
Should we say that this issomething so wildly unforgivable
that you should hate yourselfand feel like you are a terrible
person for it?
Or should we redefine theparameters where it says, if
you're married for 40 years andyou fuck up once or twice, like?
Should we have a different wayof dealing with the fact that as

(37:07):
animals, even though we'rehuman beings, as animals we will
have these impulses and wemight make these mistakes.
And how do we recover frommaking those mistakes and how do
we keep our identity, saying Ido love you, I do care about you
.
I am trying to take care of you, but also I fucked up in this
way.

Speaker 2 (37:26):
This isn't a direct response to that, but you
sparked this for me.
I knew you know to haveconversations about
relationships, blah, blah, blah.
And this woman shared with methat she actually told her
husband, essentially with whatwas going on in their lives.
Look the way shit is.
I'm gonna cheat, like if wedon't sort out what the fuck's

(37:46):
happening right now, and Ithought that was such a brave
thing to do and I think itspeaks to somewhat just saying
around shame because not beingable to address, like in that
case it's in different cases, Imean 50% of relationships.
I mean we talk up pretty bignumbers here, right, so there's

(38:09):
a lot of things going on, but Ithink sometimes what's going on
is some version of there's someexperience I'm looking to have
that I'm not having.
Who knows that could be,depending on the person, any
number of things and ourinability or our lack of skill,

(38:32):
frankly, in being able torecognize our needs and
articulate our needs and bevulnerable enough to share our
needs.
It's so across the board lowthat I think then the acting out
does become a piece of it.
I'll connect this quicklybecause I brought it up with

(38:54):
somebody else and I've beenthinking about it a lot in terms
of our Ted Lasso conversations,michelle and Dr J, and the more
I've thought about it, becausewhen Ted talks to her about it,
she hangs up and then she smiles.

(39:15):
I think Michelle was like I haveknown this man, I have fallen
in love with this man, I havehad this man's child and I don't
actually know at any givenmoment what actual emotion he's
really experiencing, becausehe's gonna talk about Rosa Parks
in a fucking donut, and so Ithink it was like what rule

(39:42):
could I break?
What fucking thing could I dothat would get you to say it's
not all good, it ain't allsunshine and rainbows.
There's no pithy rhyming with afamous name that you're gonna
do to fix it.
Like that we're gonna deal withsome real shit.
And so, yeah, I think ourability, I think that 50% number

(40:10):
would come way down.
I don't think it would go tozero, cause I think there are a
lot of things going on, but Ithink it would come way down if
we were just better at that.

Speaker 3 (40:21):
Oh yeah, yeah, I never wanna absolutely agree
with that.
Number two I think that youmight find people like Rupert
who seem to be serial cheaters,or other famous rich men who are
serial cheaters.
If we had a differentunderstanding of what the

(40:43):
requirement in a relationship is.
And this isn't gonna be acrossthe board.
It's not gonna say, well, youget married and then you never
look at it in person other thanyour spouse for the rest of your
life, like it's not across theboard standard.
But you say this is what I needfrom the relationship and the
other person says, okay, this iswhat I can do for you, this is
what I could give to you.

Speaker 4 (41:01):
So this is Rupert.
I hear you, boss, rupert.
I love that you made thatconnection, because him cheating
is totally different from thetype of cheating that I feel
like with Rupert.
If you had an open marriage andyou said go ahead and do it it
would take all of the joy out ofit because the whole thing is

(41:22):
the sort of back alley nature ofit.

Speaker 2 (41:25):
Well, I think yes and .
I think it's a bit of.
It's the same drive that gothim to his billionaire status.
I would say looking from theoutside in, and this is total
dinosaur psychology, so I wouldacknowledge that.
But he seems to me, and the waythe show plays out, it seems to

(41:50):
me this is right.
He's looking to fill a holethat you can't actually fill.
Wow, and so how much money, howmany women?
Well, that matter very much.
Go ahead boss.
I set him up, you knock himdown.

Speaker 3 (42:06):
I don't even know where you're going with this one
.
No, that was it.
Just you try hard enough, youcan fill it.

Speaker 2 (42:12):
No, we can fill it, fill in the hole, got it, but
yeah, but I just, I think, youknow.
So he becomes a human hoarder,right, like he becomes like a,
because truly, at a certainpoint, I mean he's not a young
man, so like how many 23 yearold models Like even my favorite

(42:37):
meal.
I don't want to eat it all day,every day, for the rest of my
fuck life.
I mean, like how, you know whatI mean and so I think, yeah, I
think that.
But even that piece like howbroken we're, how broken is he
as we see over time, Well, and Ithink that that's a huge thing.

Speaker 3 (42:57):
I know for a fact that in my early in my late
teenage, early 20 years I putall of my mental unwellness.
The entire focus was getting aboyfriend.
If I got a boyfriend, then Icould prove somebody likes me so
much that I was a good enoughperson that this and this and

(43:20):
this and this, and then all ofmy other problems would go away.
And then I got a boyfriend.
I didn't like him very much andnone of my problems went away
and I was like well, this isn'tactually fixing it.
So, I think that there's so manyissues that go into this that
we think you get married, youhave a kid, and then your life
is what it's supposed to be.
Or you get married and nowyou're not gonna have any

(43:41):
trouble not cheating becauseyou're gonna love that so much.
It's automatically gonna solvethis.
We pretend that marriage is thesame as mental health all the
fucking time.

Speaker 2 (43:51):
Right, because it's not.
Oh my gosh, the perceivedstability, the perceived
stability, it's perceivedstability, yes.

Speaker 4 (43:55):
You know how many people nodded along with you
when you said that.
So why is that?
Why are we conditioned to seekextrinsic validation?
And so it's like oh, if I justget this boy like and the point,
this is where the healtheconomy comes in.
It's just that nobody told usthis, unless your parents model

(44:19):
it for you, and unless you havean example.
I remember when I filed fordivorce from my first wife, I
remember thinking I cannot modelthis for my children.
I don't want this to be theirmodel.
I know it can be better and Ican't have this be their only
relationship that they aspire to, because it's not healthy.

(44:43):
And when you step back and yousay you know, for people who've
been listening to us for yearsyou know how much I harp on the
concept of shared agreements andmarriage is a beautiful thing
when it works.
It's less beautiful when itdoesn't.
I would step back and say if wetake the any of the sort of

(45:08):
codifying of marriage out of itlet's say we take away the you
know signing agreements and thefiscal bonding of entities, and
we take away the religious, anysort of approval by religion, it
ultimately ends up being apartnership and we're
unrealistic that partnershipsthat you start in your 20s can

(45:32):
last your 70s withoutunderstanding every single
aspect of what that entails.
And we do a I mean a remarkablylousy job of preparing people
for that.
And I talk all the time abouthow people get really excited
for a wedding and not they haveno concept about the marriage
that comes after.
So we as a society, we as acivilization, have to take a

(45:55):
long, hard look at this.
If there are, I didn't know thathalf of the things were cheated
or there was some infidelity,but it's also in the language,
like I just said, infidelity,and it's like why is that, you
know?
Why is fidelity then the goal?
And why is like, why are peoplehaving relationships where a

(46:16):
shared agreement is not you know, some other form of, like
corporal satisfaction?
You know, because you getpeople all the time who are in
love, they love each other.
They get no marriage.
They find out their libidosdon't match.
Now what are you gonna do?
Like there are these threadsthat I've stumbled across where
I go.
Oh my God, like this is likeit's a whole thread about

(46:41):
somebody who's deeply, deeply inlove and they just cannot get
there.
You know, it's both, it's menand women, it's gay and straight
, it doesn't matter, it's justlike this person is the core of
my life and yet when we firstgot together, we would have sex
all the time.
And now, you know, it's taperedoff and no matter what I do, I

(47:02):
can't seem to reignite the sparkand people are suffering over
it.
And is it any wonder, when thesethings aren't sort of addressed
upfront, that it can lead to,you know, tribulations in a
relationship?
It's not.
We don't do a good job ofpreparing for that and, like I
said, the language isinstructive.
It's funny.

(47:24):
I picked up my 14 year old.
He just turned 14.
The other day picked him up theday after his birthday and he
was driving home and he said howmany words can you name for
someone who's not religious, so,but also like someone, a

(47:50):
religious, somebody like thatwould be sort of branded by?
Maybe you know, historicallybranded and less so today, but
how many words in the language?

Speaker 3 (48:01):
I mean it depends on what exactly you're going for.
You could do straight atheistor agnostic.
There's also a heretic.

Speaker 4 (48:08):
Yep keep going.

Speaker 3 (48:10):
Oh God, I mean, you're gonna ask me about this.

Speaker 4 (48:12):
I'm saying pagan, non-believer.

Speaker 3 (48:15):
Well, a non-believer, I would say, I would actually
argue against pagan.
I would say that pagan is areligion.
It's just not a religion thatwe believe in anymore or that we
don't necessarily accept.

Speaker 4 (48:25):
Absolutely yes, but I'm saying in colloquial terms,
there are what?
Eight or 10 terms for someone?
Yeah right, like a heathen,apostate.
There's all these differentterms that are pretty widely
used, even if they're usedimproperly.
Is what I'm saying.
You might say, okay, here's theactual etymological root of

(48:47):
pagan.
And I might say, well, you know, my neighbor used it the wrong
way yesterday.
But he right so I'm saying it'sin the language.
And then he said to me how manywords are there in the English
language for the day aftertomorrow?

Speaker 3 (49:03):
Yeah, no, it's tomorrow.

Speaker 4 (49:05):
The day after tomorrow.
Does that have a name?
The day after tomorrow?

Speaker 3 (49:08):
Yeah, no, not tomorrow, two days from now.

Speaker 4 (49:10):
Two days from now, but it's not.

Speaker 3 (49:13):
That's how the boyfriend refers to the Dennis
Quay film.
The day after tomorrow, oh, youknow, two days from now.

Speaker 4 (49:22):
I thought anyway, I thought it was instructive
because I thought, wow, that isfunny.
You just inherently we are sobridled with the language that
it will say, okay if you're notin this one group.
And again, this is nothingagainst religious people, this
is not.
This is not a tack on peoplewho are religious.

(49:42):
I've said many, many times.
This is not.
People have lost the nuancewith regard to that.
I happen to not be, but I reallylove spirituality and I love
how people find wherever theyfind it.
It's fine by me, as long as itdoesn't negatively impact
somebody else, like most of therules that I try to adhere to.

(50:06):
So, yeah, anyway, I just thinkit's just an interesting thing
where language affects that.
And then we have lots of wordsfor cheaters and you don't have
a single word for adultunmarried boyfriend and
girlfriend.
Like Julianne and I have beentogether for 16 years 15 years,
something, you know a long asstime and right, and there's no

(50:31):
word for we say partner.
Usually you say partner.
People think gay, so it's justa weird.
You know less so now because,like there's more of us out
there, so now you can sort ofsay partner and they whatever.

Speaker 3 (50:43):
But there's no automatic word for it.
There's still no good word foryour partner's parents or family
.

Speaker 4 (50:52):
Oh yeah, that isn't in-law.

Speaker 3 (50:53):
Yeah, right, right, yeah yeah yeah, Other than
in-law, you're not getting.
You're not getting a partner inlaw.
That's not a thing that peoplegenerally say.

Speaker 4 (51:03):
Because it's technically not in-law.

Speaker 3 (51:04):
My mother my mother in partner, like it doesn't make
any fucking sense.
You can't figure out a word forthat.
I think that's a really goodpoint.
I think I was just this pastweek and discussing how and I'm
pretty sure I've mentionedanother podcast before but the
idea that when a woman isinterested in a man who might

(51:26):
not be standardly physicallyattractive but is smart and
ambitious and successful, wewould label her a gold digger
yes, If that man, who is maybenot conventionally attractive
but has a lot of money, marriesa much hotter, often younger,
wife, we refer to him as nothing.
We still call her the trophywife.

(51:47):
In both cases, regardless ofwho we are considered to have
done something good or bad, thelabel is applied to the woman
and the way that that negativelyimpacts our perception of her.
Theoretically, donald Trump isthe asshole because he could
only get a much younger, hotterwife because he has so much
money.
Even if you don't think well ofhim, she is the one with the

(52:10):
label.
I think that there are so manythings that are built into
marriage that are stillconnected to treating women like
property considering a woman tobe something that two men agree
to exchange in order to endsome war in France or England,
or some bullshit that we don'thave a good idea about the way
we're supposed to treat spouseswithin the relationship that

(52:33):
we've only within maybe mygeneration decided that partners
are actually supposed to beequal.
In some sense, that's the way,like there's a lot of shit.

Speaker 2 (52:43):
I know when was that vote taken I didn't get that
memo.

Speaker 3 (52:47):
I know, I don't know if your wives have informed you
yet, but you guys should betreated equally.
Now I don't know if they'redoing it, but they should be
treating you better.

Speaker 2 (53:00):
Should be treated equally.
Yeah, okay, yeah.

Speaker 3 (53:05):
Don't tell her who told you that.

Speaker 2 (53:07):
Do not bring my name into it.

Speaker 3 (53:09):
I cannot blow up their spots, but just that I on
threads the other dayre-threaded I don't know the
terminology there either butthat we societally raised one
generation of women to feelempowered and didn't raise the
same generation of men to dealwith empowered women.

(53:30):
So we were at a fucking point.

Speaker 4 (53:35):
We talked about that on this podcast.
We talked about that exactpoint Really.
Men are lagging, lagging wayway behind, Even in role models.
I posted that the YouTube videotalks about how there's no
total absence of male rolemodels on television.
I got Bandit Healer right behindme.

(53:56):
You can see that right there.
It's the best dad I know ontelevision and he's a cartoon
dog, australian cartoon dog man.
We're just killing it.
We're killing it as a culture.
But yes, these are all amazingpoints.
If any of these things haveresonated with you, if it's

(54:22):
something that you've beencontending with, we hope that
you will think about joining theButter Cups and coming and
chatting with us on thecommunity site.
Let's roll into the last 10minutes or so of Wayne, episode
7.
When we left last time, coach,if you remember, we were at a

(54:47):
scene where Del comes out andshe basically was like we got to
go get some booze.
Bradley, as we mentioned, isone of those people that's like
whatever, the last thing hehears is the best idea.
He's like yes, absolutely, wegot to do that.

Speaker 1 (55:08):
Maybe we should get some cocaine and we should get
some.
Whatever, he's just totally,he's total mess.

Speaker 4 (55:15):
But Del has a point and her thing is, boss.
This is what we left off.
I don't know if you I don'tthink you've listened to the
last episode yet but when Delwas in there no matter how much
everybody else hears BobbyLuchetti screaming and yelling
and carrying on being psycho sheheard pain, she heard actual

(55:38):
suffering.
He was hurting and it'ssomething that she this goes
back to you.
We quoted you several times.
The whole thing on the episodewas a lot of love for you.
It was just a real lot ofcompliments directed towards you
, boss, and one of the things wesaid was when you talked about

(55:59):
I don't remember if it was RosieO'Donnell, it was some comedian
who saw somebody be drunk andthey're like no, no, that's a
good drunk, you don't have toworry about that.

Speaker 3 (56:06):
Yeah Right, rosie O'Donnell and Danny DeVito.

Speaker 4 (56:08):
Is that what it was?
Okay, it was Rosie O'Donnell.
Okay, and I said that like.
So if you're, if you are,conditioned to deal with people
who are under the influence, youcan hear things that other
people are not going to hear.
And so we brought that up andwe said, okay, dell feels like
she's got to do something forher dad.
Can we hurry the fuck up please?

(56:30):
And she turns around andBradley says do not get her
pregnant.
Now we are.
We're in the parking lot, wewere mixing drinks and we did
this beginning of this last time, and right where we finished
was Bradley takes a sip of theCape Cod.

(56:56):
Cooley, this is we're trying tofigure out what was in this
thing.
It looks gnarly.
He takes a sip and he goes ohGod, that's rude and then he
drinks more.

Speaker 2 (57:13):
So that was a time in life.
We got into that a little bitlast time, but like there's a
time in your life when that'sthe reflex, I would have thrown
that bottle.
So far, yeah what, I don't haveto put up with this.
Like I feel a little bit sickwatching him drink it.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (57:31):
So definitely now that I'm an adult.
Oh my God, I I got a six packof beer a couple weeks ago.
Sometimes I like to have anadult beverage after dinner.

Speaker 1 (57:45):
I'm an adult, I could do that and I realized it was.

Speaker 3 (57:48):
It was not a bad batch, but there was something
weird about it that made itexplode.
It had been in my fridge fordays and I would open one can
and it would still overflow andI was like I'm not drinking this
anymore, like whatever'shappening with this, I don't, I
don't like it.
And then I just threw all ofthe beer away and there was like
the 16 year old and me wouldhave been like what the fuck are

(58:09):
you doing?
You made me drink Skoll vodka.
You know somebody who purchasedAsko brand tequila and you're
throwing away per yeah yeah,you're throwing away perfectly
decent beer just because it hastoo much head.
You're, but no.

Speaker 4 (58:26):
I'm an adult.

Speaker 3 (58:26):
now I don't have to do that.

Speaker 4 (58:28):
Coach, I need too much head joke.
I really was.

Speaker 3 (58:32):
It's not a joke, because it's impossible.
There's no such thing.
Yeah, no such thing.

Speaker 2 (58:37):
You know what boss took care of it.
I'm going to go back on muteshe does for most things.

Speaker 4 (58:44):
So Dell Dell says she's heading in and of course,
wayne has now had a change ofheart we talked about you know.
Listen, wayne's learning curveis pretty damn good.
He learns from his mistakes.
He had made the mistake earlierin the episode.
He's not going to make the samemistake again.
I do really really like it is.
It is a borderline superpower,considering what an Encino man

(59:06):
he is and how little like anymodeling he has in his life,
that he picks up on this soquickly.
Go ahead, coach.

Speaker 2 (59:16):
But, I think, in an interesting way.
The Encino man comic made melaugh, but it also, I think,
speaks to why he can, and it'sthe comment that came up earlier
about not having prepared ageneration of men.
He has intentionally removedhimself from what I'll describe,
for simplicity, as themainstream, so he hasn't taken

(59:39):
in a lot of that shit.
He sees justice and he seesinjustice, he sees right and
wrong, but he's not like oh, I'ma dude, I'm not going to follow
some girl into the hospital.
You know what I mean?
Like he.
He he's just like what's theright thing to do?
Oh shit, I just learned thatthe right thing to do is to be

(59:59):
supportive here, even if it'sgoing to suck for me.
Yeah, you know, like we'd, we'dalmost in some cases.
I guess what I'm saying is we'dalmost be better off if we had
raised some boys in the wildthan to have taught them all the
shit we've taught them to thispoint and now to try to have

(01:00:20):
them unlearn that so that theycan be the things we're talking
about.

Speaker 3 (01:00:25):
Yeah, I don't know if I think that he is uncivilized,
so much as I think that he hassurprisingly little ego and not
ego in terms of self confidence.
These two things are differentyeah.
The self confidence is I do thisthing well and I feel pretty
good about it, and ego is ifsomebody says something mean or

(01:00:48):
bad about me, I must be aterrible person.
I can't stand that.
So I think that what he has isa great ability to say I fucked
up, I shouldn't have, I'm goingto fix it in the future.
But you get all these peopleall the time that said, oh, I
did this thing.
But the fucking.
I don't know if I can'tremember if we've talked about
this, but the Willie's chocolateexperience in Scotland.

Speaker 2 (01:01:11):
You did, we did talk about it.
Yes, yes, yes, they were fresh.
Yeah, go back.

Speaker 3 (01:01:17):
Some guy used AI generated descriptions.

Speaker 4 (01:01:21):
Oh yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:01:22):
Yeah, there's going to be an immersive not Willy
Wonka, but Willy Wonkaexperience in some warehouse.
And then it was a fucking joke.
It was terrible.
And he did an interview and hewas like I've lost all my
friends.
My partner left me.
I didn't mean to.
This isn't who I am as a personand I'm like no, you are saying
that people telling you thatyou did something wrong is an

(01:01:42):
indication of who you are as aperson.
What we're saying is you didsomething wrong.
You need to separate those twothings.
You fucked up.
I'm not saying you deserve togo to hell, I'm saying you
fucked this up, except that andthen move on from it.
And I think that Wayne actuallyhas a great ability to do that.
Like I fucked something up, Iam not a fuck up.

(01:02:03):
He knows the difference thereand he knows how to spot.

Speaker 2 (01:02:06):
I think there's a distance that you're describing
to between fixed and growthmindsets.
I'm for real about that.
Yes, one of the most powerfulsermons, personally, I ever
heard, this woman who was inDivinity School shared with us
that the translation when peoplesay that God said I am which

(01:02:27):
okay, quickly, that's in thescripture, so okay that the
actual translation is more likeI am becoming what I am becoming
.
So, even if you believe thisliterally or not, blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah.
I think that would completelychange, like almost everything

(01:02:48):
about my church upbringing, thatit's an evolving thing.
And so I think sometimes whenpeople say what boss just
highlighted, which is like I'mnot that kind of person, they're
almost treating the self aslike this fixed thing.
And then, whereas I think whatWayne is saying is the person I

(01:03:14):
wish to be had really dealt withthis particular piece, but the
person I wish to be would gointo the hospital with you, I'm
realizing.
So now I'm going to go into thehospital with you.
It's not fixed.
He's like he is learning as hegoes and he's moving toward in
any moment who he wants to be asWayne.
I think we'd be a lot betteroff in a number of ways if we,

(01:03:38):
if we could see ourselves thatway, because it always makes me
go oh, I'm a racist born in mybody.
I'm like, listen, I got racismin my views.
How the fuck, do you not?
How could you live here?
Like I mean it's like saying youhave no water, no oxygen, like
you're surrounded by the shit,like this is impossible.
I don't see color yeah exactly.

Speaker 4 (01:03:59):
Exactly, you know sorry.
So it must be tough for you,coach, with your, with your
racist tendencies.
I, some of us, are just really,really bad.

Speaker 2 (01:04:09):
We're just people.

Speaker 4 (01:04:11):
I saw a thing, or Elon Musk was like I don't want
people to use racism as excuse.
It's really boring, I don'twant here.
And I was like, oh my God, likeI don't know that it wasn't
deep fake, I didn't go into it,but it looked real and I was
like you're not really sayingthat out loud.
I was like, wow, because,because, on top of being

(01:04:31):
insensitive and and like likechicken level ignorant you know
what I mean you just go like,wow, your entitlement is so you
don't want to be bothered, rightHearing everybody chirp about
how this all the racist stuffthat happened to them.

Speaker 2 (01:04:49):
I don't know Time for that Civil rights error man.
Oh my God.

Speaker 4 (01:04:54):
I was like, wow, yeah , I.
Anyway, I want to point outthat Wayne's.
The only role model Wayne hasreally ever had is his father,
who had that code, a very blackand white sort of thing, no
nuance, no gray area and his.
The only role model he hasthat's not his father and

(01:05:16):
they've only alluded to it alittle bit is Conan the
barbarian who just handles shitwith a sword.
So it's not that much of areach.
Just who is, who isintentionally uncivilized, who
embraces it as a character thatembraces his lack of civility.
He thinks civilization is a jokeand you know you handle things

(01:05:41):
with your sword.
So Wayne has has beenconditioned to do that from the
only two primary influences inhis life.
So to see him follow Dylan isgreat.
He says I'm going to go withyou.
She says I don't want you toknow.
He says, del, no, I don't wantto, I don't want you to catch a
cold or some shit, because she'sa tough.
She's a tough cookie and she'sbeen.
She's clearly wounded, right.

Speaker 3 (01:06:04):
And what does Wayne say here, boss, I don't like
hospitals because of my dad.
Yeah, Because when his dad gotsick in the hospital he only got
sicker and they told me he wasnever going to get better and
nothing.
They tried to meet him better,so I like that he was able to

(01:06:25):
express to her I'm not unwillingto go in because I don't care
about you.
I am hesitant to go in becauseit is difficult for me, and I
think that that's one of thethings that men need to get much
, much better at.
Just in my own experiencethere's so many times.

Speaker 4 (01:06:43):
Oh, just man, jesus Christ.

Speaker 3 (01:06:45):
Yeah, no, a little bit just men.

Speaker 2 (01:06:48):
That's the real sexism.
I'm kidding we're going to goon.

Speaker 4 (01:06:52):
That's the real sexism.
Thank you everybody.
Thank you for tuning in.

Speaker 3 (01:06:57):
I will not pretend that women don't do it sometime,
but it is the manner and yourcondition to do so.
Patriarchy hurts men as much asit hurts women.
It just prefers men.
It's what I always like to say.
Thank God, there's actually aBuzzfeed article or something
that I read late last night whenI had insomnia.

(01:07:17):
It was all these things abouthow men were saying it's about
things that women don't knowabout men.
And men were like I have beenfriends with somebody for 20
years I don't know their lastname.
I've been friends with thisgroup of guys.
We talk about what our favoriterankings of different dipping

(01:07:38):
sauces are, and so they're goingto all these things like men
can just chat about nothing.
We don't.
There was a guy I knew.
I didn't realize his name wasDave.
His name was Dave.
Like all this shit I've got.
One of my best friends is a guyI know at the gym.
We've never seen each otheroutside at the gym.
I'm like he's not your bestfriend, he's an acquaintance.
So it was all these thingsabout how impersonal their
closest guy relationships are.

(01:08:00):
And then after that they wroteabout how we're lacking physical
touch.
People don't care about myemotional well being.
If I post something on socialmedia saying I'm having a rough
week, nobody cares.
And I'm like you have to seethe connection between those two
right, like you have tounderstand how those two things
are related.

Speaker 4 (01:08:18):
What Hmm?

Speaker 3 (01:08:24):
Like if you pour all of your emotional connection and
physical well being into onerelationship.
If that relationship fails, youare fucked.
So you're going to need to likeopen yourselves up to some
level of danger where you tellpeople how you're feeling and
you tell people I don't likegoing to hospitals because it

(01:08:44):
reminds me about how my dad diedand that's why I failed to go
in with you before, but now I'mgoing to because I'm going to
address that.

Speaker 4 (01:08:52):
This is why, when coach and I see each other after
a long time, we just turnaround and rub our butts up
against each other.
I was like what the fuck's heabout to say?
Luna, don't be really cool ifwe did, though.

Speaker 3 (01:09:08):
Is that weird?
I just rubbed my boobs.
No, no, we're trying todisperse the physicality.

Speaker 4 (01:09:14):
It can't all be Daphne, Sorry.

Speaker 2 (01:09:16):
Daphne, that's right, you don't get all of him.
So, totally hearing everythingyou just said, and I think
there's like a how do I framethis?
I think there's a combinationof things that can happen that

(01:09:37):
would be healthy.
So there's a level of like.
I've had women friends who likeanytime we're going to connect,
like I know we're going to talkabout some shit eventually,
like we're going to go on andwe're going to get into
something, and it might besomething that's actually going
on in either of our lives.
It could be from we're going toget into some shit and we're
going to dig in.

(01:09:57):
And I do have.
I have male friends I can dothat with, but who I also like
coach and I can have a wholefucking an hour on fantasy
football.
But I think it's the it's whenit's exclusively that and when
the other would be a problem.

(01:10:18):
And I've actually consciouslynow also have I tend not to have
guys who are close to me atthis point in my life who would
be like so freaked out by, youknow, human emotions, so I
acknowledge that.
But I am willing to make itawkward, like I am willing to be
like love you man as we hang upand some of my guy friends

(01:10:39):
respond and some pretend theydidn't hear me and they hang up
and I and it's fine.

Speaker 3 (01:10:44):
And it's fine, thor, it's fine.
He doesn't mind at all, it'sfine, you know so there you go.

Speaker 4 (01:10:49):
I get really grossed out because I just think it's
like super sexual.

Speaker 3 (01:10:54):
And he's just coming at you, coach.

Speaker 4 (01:10:59):
And I'm like dude Jesus, it's got a full out,
that's right, yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:11:05):
No, I think that's a really good point actually,
because I can't imagine howfucking exhausting it would be
to have only significant, deep,like emotionally bearing
conversations with every personin your life all the time.
Right, like, I can talk withall of my friends about these
things, but also sometimes I getreally fucking drunk and dance

(01:11:29):
to yeah, add a bad bar insandwich Illinois with my friend
Mandy, like sometimes you justfuck around.
So yes, there should be a wayto move through all those levels
comfortably.

Speaker 2 (01:11:41):
Now there's something it's a step aside, but in this
scene that I think is worthcalling out in the context of
conversation we're having ongender, and it is that, like
Bobby Dell Dell expresses beingin pain with a brand of violence

(01:12:04):
Right, you might catch a coldor some shit Like she's.
That's definitely not just likeemotionally balanced.
I really didn't enjoy that.
You didn't support me, right.
Like it's.
It's, you know, that's ahurling of a rock back over her
shoulder.
And and I bring it up because Ialso think that some of the

(01:12:28):
conversation we're having aboutmen and women is also making
room for women to be whateveryou want to call it, 360 or
whatever human, in that she'snot always going to have the
perfectly emotionally balancedresponse and she's not always
going to be able to do her workand his work too.

(01:12:51):
Matter of fact, right now she'sdealing with her dying father.
She don't want to do nomotherfucking work.
You want to mix this Cape.
Todd coolly and deliver itinside, because this
motherfucker alcoholic and heain't going to calm down till
you get his fucking drink,absolutely, you know.
And so I think there's Daphnetalks.
I've thought about this, butrecently Daphne has spoken to

(01:13:12):
the fact that, like my, mychildren have a right to be
mediocre like anybody else.
Right, can we talk about likeblack excellence and all this
stuff, and it's very exciting.
But it's also, like Jesus,that's a lot of God day
impressions, like I can't justeverything you do.
If you did, you got to be thegreatest motherfucker in a
certain point.
Um, yeah, she should be allowedto be like you know what?

(01:13:36):
I need you to come inside withme.
You didn't.
I'm kind of pissed about it.
I got other shit going on and Ican't take care of your
feelings and my feelings too, sothere, yes, we call that, that
mediocrity.

Speaker 4 (01:13:48):
We call white excellence coach True.

Speaker 2 (01:13:51):
Fucking true, I have to say quickly, I will say that
between Elon Musk and a certainformer president, they are
really blowing up the whiteman's game.
Like the white, like you'llnever be the same again, guys,
they have fucked up your shitCats out of the bag, cats out of
the bag.

Speaker 4 (01:14:10):
Um, yes, and and, and .
There's this beat here.
It's funny, like when you seeone thing, you see it everywhere
.
Uh, Dr Sharon admits to Ted hey, listen, if I you taught me
something.
I thought I was the best, butit took me to open up to you, to
really do this.
In this moment where, where umWayne is vulnerable to Dell, I
was, um, I'm reading this book,uh, by Chicago's own Edwards

(01:14:34):
Wick.
Do you know, uh, ed's Wick, theAmerican filmmaker boss,
unfortunately not, no, thedirector of glory they were here
of glory, oh, oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah Um, he wrote his uh.
He's 71 years old, uh, proudson of Chicago.
Uh, he wrote about his, uh, hisHollywood career and it's sort
of everyone in town has writtenit.

(01:14:55):
Um, but it is uh, it's so goodand I really enjoyed it.
But there was this one momenthe was talking about where he
got his first gig directing afeature film.
He was hopping from TV to uhfilm and he was directing a, a,
a film that later uh be calledabout last night I think it's
called Um with a Rob starringRob Lowe, and remember that one

(01:15:19):
yeah.
His first first feature and hewas getting into I guess Jim
Belushi was in it Um and uh,chicago's own Jim Belushi and
the two of them were, or justnot.
Jim was like not listening tohim and this week was, you know,
getting frustrated and they gotinto a shouting match and it

(01:15:41):
was somewhere on the on the L?
Um where they had to like getoff the train.
And then they he's like, aswe're screaming, we see like the
train they had to like do it ona loop cause you can't stop the
train.
So he's like, as we're yelling,like screaming, fuck you, no,
fuck you, no, fuck you, no, fuckyou Like.
He's like I see the doorsclosed and our whole crew and

(01:16:01):
the producers, like everyonejust pulls away and the two of
us are left on this platform.
And he's like we started runningout of dialogue.
It's so funny and and he waslike at some point it was so hot
, like physical violence wasabout to erupt.
He's like I'll never know why Isaid it.
He's like, but I was like, ifyou don't, I'm just really

(01:16:24):
worried, man, like, if you don'tdo this, I'm going to lose my
job.
And I've never had it as myfirst feature film.
I'll never get another one ifthey fired me off this and I'm
just scared.
Man and it's belushi,apparently instantly switched
Like once he heard that he wentoh, he's like they're not going
to do anything.
Come here, man, and he openedhis arms and hugged him.

(01:16:45):
He's like I got you, I got youand they've been friends ever
since.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:16:50):
It's, it's, it's fascinating those.
Sorry coach, I didn't mean tocut you off, no, no, that's it.

Speaker 4 (01:16:54):
That's the start, but it's like one year when you
show that vulnerability right,but one person has to lean into
the boat, right?
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:17:01):
Exactly, and I'm not.
I'm not as weak and don'tpretend to be, but when I
directed dinner for two coachwill tell you I mean it was, you
know, million dollar budgettops 14 days.
I mean it was just.
But for me this was my chanceand this was the script I had
written, that I had actuallyprayed and said out loud

(01:17:22):
whatever my equivalent ofprayers was.
If I could only ever bring onething to screen, it was going to
be this thing and I had thischance to do it.
So I was so on it.
I mean I was, and we so Iwanted to like break down every
shot every minute, be walk on aset so prepared.

(01:17:43):
My poor DP also wanted it andthis was her first feature.
She's gone on and like shootall this Marvel stuff and
whatever.
She's amazing.
And so she.
But she was like frankly tiredand I was like, all right, we
need to meet about this and weneed to meet about this sequence
and we need to, you know, and Iwas going to do all we want to
do all these hours and shepushed back and was like, hey,

(01:18:07):
like this is not normal during ashoot.
Like you know, we do a long dayand then you want to meet at
night after the shoot.
So we're kind of you know it'stense and she goes to get off.
We're finishing up the meetingand she goes to get off the
elevator.
And I stepped off the elevatorand I didn't do the exact same.

(01:18:28):
I basically I said, look, Ihave been through so much, I
traveled across the country, Ileft my family behind.
This has been a nightmare and Ifeel like I have this one
chance to prove that I was rightand they were wrong and I can

(01:18:48):
do this.
And I really started tearing up,like I started choking on it.
It wasn't for a fact, like Iwas really like, look, I'm going
to just lay it out.
And I said I just need thisthing to be great.
I said I don't know that I'llever get to do anything else.
I need this to be great.
And I watched her entire, likeI could physically see her

(01:19:10):
change.
Yeah, and she was just like,okay, Like she, just like you
know, she heard me.
It didn't mean she wanted tomeet for another five hours, but
she, like she got what it wasshe was experiencing from me.
Cut to later, just so I couldfeel like a total asshole in
this story Cut to later.
We've shot the thing, blah,blah, blah, and she announces

(01:19:31):
that she's been pregnant thewhole time.

Speaker 3 (01:19:33):
Holy shit and.
I was like okay, I didn't seethat for a couple of hours.

Speaker 2 (01:19:38):
I was like I am so fucking sorry.
I am so fucking sorry.
So she was like oh, I'm tired,because you know what it like
say what the fuck was reallygoing on.
I was like I am the worst everand I am so sorry.
She, you know, she knocked itout of her too.
Fantastic, anna, wherever youare, if you ever hear this, I
still love you.
Everything's fantastic.

(01:19:59):
We ended up so tight.

Speaker 4 (01:20:01):
No, no, I'm well, yeah we ended up so tight with
everybody, coach.
There's a reason that funny.

Speaker 2 (01:20:05):
Yeah, yeah, I love you, I love you.

Speaker 4 (01:20:09):
I, like you, should not get along with boss.
I'm telling you she's not good.
I want to point out, when we'relooking at here at Wayne yeah,
we just left Bradley saying ohthat's so rude, right, and so
he's back wherever they left himin the parking lot.

(01:20:29):
But we don't point outcontinuity a lot because it's a
you know it's a low budget show,they scrapped us together but
it's not Bradley in thebackground right there.

Speaker 2 (01:20:38):
You know it could be.
I didn't notice it but it couldbe.
And yeah, these things I mean,especially when you are just
like running and gunning in andwe use this shot, you know like
it.
Very well, it could be.
I mean that person does, I meanthey certainly, whoever that is
, certainly favors him.
If it's not him, right.

(01:20:59):
But yeah, if you watch enoughmovies, this, this shit, shows
up.
I've been rewatching seasonthree, total, totally a comfort
view at this point.
I've watched enough Ted Lassothat I can like categorize the
views for you.
So this one is just a totalcomfort view.
I was unhappy and I wanted to behappy and there are now like
I've watched it enough that Ican catch it like, wait a minute

(01:21:23):
, he wasn't, he wasn't smilingin a two shot, yeah.
And there are a few of thosenow that I'm like I caught, yeah
, and it only took me 57 viewsin your face.

Speaker 4 (01:21:35):
Yeah, no, I well this one.
I get Sean Simmons and the andthe and the writing team here of
Wayne.
They do such a great job withthe ancillary characters that
when I see this shot I see whatmight be Bradley.
And then I see the other threepeople and I'm like, oh, what
story lines for those threedidn't have to get clipped out.

(01:21:56):
You know I ended up on theediting room floor but you have
this big, this nice moment.
Well, you know, wayne isvulnerable.
He says I just don't like himabout hospitals, but I went for
him and now I'm going to go foryou, which I really like and
which Dell likes.
So can I come or whatever, butlisten, dell likes it.

(01:22:16):
Right, but Dell is Lucchetti.
So is she going to fawn allover him?
Absolutely not.
She can like it withoutcompletely changing her demeanor
.
And what does she say here,coach?

Speaker 2 (01:22:29):
in response to this very vulnerable gesture of his,
she says don't expect a goddamnmedal, because that's what
that's, that's what you, that'swhat your welcome sounds like in
the Lucchetti In Bostonese.

Speaker 4 (01:22:48):
You know you don't expect a goddamn medal.
So they walk in, there's somecops waiting and they zip into
the nearest doorway and it putsthem in the morgue, in the
morgue of the hospital.
And, boss, we've been watchingFor those listening the, I have

(01:23:11):
watched Wayne many, many times,all the way through, many times.
There are 10 episodes, boss andcoach.
We decided would watch it as ifit's like an episodic show
where they watch it and then andthen we have the episode one at
a time, so they don't know,like, for example, what's in
episode eight.
They're learning it the waythat you guys are learning it at

(01:23:32):
home.
And so boss had gallbladderinfection last last time I think
it was.

Speaker 3 (01:23:44):
I think you're intentionally at this point
ignoring that it was 100% myovary and not a gallbladder but
it definitely definitely was anovary, my apologies.

Speaker 4 (01:23:54):
So she had kidney stones last time.
And what happened was you didnot get to see coach's reaction
to this scene in real time.
But, coach, why don't you walkus through this?
Because you had a powerfulreaction to it.
I will start, I'll start it offand then I'll hand it over,
because I like this thing.
They walk in, they realize wait, we're in the morgue.

(01:24:18):
There's a lot of a lot ofcadavers who are covered by
almost stiffs.
And then I felt like, oh God,I'm such a trash person.
You can't say funny.
A bunch of stiffs.
That's horrible.
These are human.
Where the hell is that comingfrom?
Anyway, a bunch of stiffs.
I mean you use that as a termfor someone who is dullered in

(01:24:40):
real life, but you don't use itas for actual cadavers.

Speaker 3 (01:24:46):
So I mean they do well, yeah, but also the rigor
mortis means they are prettystiff.
It's descriptive, if nothingelse.

Speaker 4 (01:24:53):
See animals in the pit.
I'm trying to get up the stairs, coach, and bosses reminding me
.
There are no stairs, we're allin the mosh pit, I mean you just
, just, oh, you know what?

Speaker 3 (01:25:04):
I will get out of the pit.
Actually, I have a goal in lifeI will get out of the pit, and
that is when I am launched fromthe trebuchet.

Speaker 4 (01:25:11):
Yes, Out of the pit?
Yes, we're back into the pit.
Right, we're your stiff Right.
Yes, and over, and one assumes,because of the rigor mortis
that you've pointed out, assover two kettles, as they say.

Speaker 3 (01:25:23):
Yeah, as long as you can get everything together in
time.

Speaker 2 (01:25:26):
Otherwise I'm going to get sloppy again, oh wow.
All right, okay, floppy again,I gotta be sure, let's talk
about Wayne then I guess I don'tknow.

Speaker 4 (01:25:41):
So Wayne says are all those dead?
And then I just love this nextline, so much it is so it is.
So del is so snarky.
She leans forward and she sayswhat here, boss?

Speaker 3 (01:25:58):
I don't know.
Let me ask, excuse me Are youguys dead Such?

Speaker 2 (01:26:02):
a fucking smart ass and she goes yeah, they're
fucking dead.

Speaker 4 (01:26:06):
They're fucking dead.
And then we hear somebody comein and you know, someone jiggled
the door and they duck whenwould you go?
Where would you hide?
Right, you're not a cheat andlover.
So it's not under the bed orthe closet.
But wait, wait.
What's the version of under thebed and the morgue?
It is under the gurney that isholding the cadaver, which is

(01:26:30):
draped with white sheets that godown far enough to obscure the
bottom shelf of the metal sortof examining table or slash
gurney.
So Del says, shit, come on.
They hear someone jiggle in thedoor.
Shit, come on.
They grab them, pulls themunder the nearest cadaver.

(01:26:52):
For those watching at home, whodon't watch the show and just
listen to us saying, I'm notmaking this up, this is what
they.
They're in a morgue and theyhave gone underneath a dead body
too high, not the body itself,underneath the table holding the
dead body.
So in walks too, looks likesheriffs or like they have that

(01:27:16):
in Massachusetts.
That's the.
I know there's a word for it.
It's the wide brimmed that wecall this with the state police.
Wear it, but it's not like theball cap, it's the one with the
hat goes all the way around.
Is there a term for that boss?
You should know this from youryears in law enforcement.

Speaker 3 (01:27:33):
The super troopers hat, the super troopers hat,
that's right, thank you, thankyou.

Speaker 4 (01:27:36):
And so these two guys walk in.
You got a younger one, sort ofa smaller one, and a bigger one.
And the smaller one says, yep,there's a son of a bitch right
there, no fucking doubt.
And this is where I love.
We talk about how humans aremessy and how this show captures
it better than anyone, and alsohow there are no small roles in

(01:27:58):
this show.
Right, and there's the son of abitch right there, no fucking
doubt.
He walks up to the guy and wedo a quick cut to underneath.
Right, you have Dell and Wayneare huddled face to face, really

(01:28:18):
pushed together tightly to fitonto the metal shelving.
And then we hear the guy, thelittle guy, punch Boom, the
corpse, the cadaver, punch it.
And the other guy goes dude,cut the shit, you can't be
punching dead bodies.

Speaker 2 (01:28:38):
And it's interesting cause we do have rules around
that right, and I'm sure it's alot, but like the respect you
know, a certain level of respectthat we are to, you know to
show the body.

Speaker 4 (01:28:48):
I mean we don't have, do we have?
Hard and fast rules Like youcan't punch a dead body, it's
just a really.

Speaker 2 (01:28:53):
it's like a well-known, accepted societal
norm right, Right, like you justwouldn't do that.
But yeah, you wouldn't do that.

Speaker 4 (01:29:00):
He does.
And so the guy chastises him,his partner.
He says this guy killed mypartner, I don't give two,
goddamn.
And then he stops and he says,wait, does this guy not have a
mustache?
And he pulls the sheet down,sees that the guy doesn't have a
mustache and goes shit.
Now his partner is looking athim like he's a complete turd.

(01:29:23):
This is just, you're just likewhat?
Again, they could have chosenanything.
They could have had a nursecome in to get some syringes
they could have.
You know, when you create, whenyou're a creator, show creator,
you create whatever.
And but I love the inclination,the way that this show

(01:29:50):
constantly paints charactersfull of vibrancy.
Now we know this guy's partnergot killed and he's suffering
over it to the point where he'swilling to hit a.
Now it's the wrong cadaver.
And his partner just looks athim like he's a fucking lunatic
and he says you fucking idiot.

(01:30:10):
And they walk out.
And before the little guy walksout, who was doing the punching
?
He leans into the cadaver andwhat does he say?
boss, he goes, my bad man my badman To the dead person and then
covers his face up.

Speaker 3 (01:30:26):
I have to say I obviously don't care that much
about what happens to my bodyafter I die, hence the Trebuchet
jokes.
And in real life I really domean it, like put me in a hole.
I don't care.
If science could use anything,go for it, otherwise I don't
care.
I do like that some peoplerespect the dead body enough.

(01:30:51):
That one they would want topunch it, but then two also they
would apologize to it.
This is sort of like how you'llnotice people will say excuse
me to the dog if theyaccidentally like bump into it.
I kind of like that.
Like the dog doesn't reallyunderstand but say excuse me,
I'm sorry.
Like it says more abouthumanity than anything else.

Speaker 4 (01:31:11):
All I saw now was thanks, Alexa.
We don't have an Alexa wheneverhe gets to use one or Siri or
any AI.
He's like.
This is a data driven device.
They're going to know who ispolite to them before they take
over, so I want to make sure I'mon record, as I always
respected him.
I feel like I can see him.

Speaker 2 (01:31:31):
Yeah, he goes thank you very much Logicking that
through.

Speaker 4 (01:31:34):
He's like look hey just in case Drives his siblings
.
They're like you, idiot.
Stop saying thank you to thecomputer.

Speaker 3 (01:31:42):
He's like I got to play the thing that Siri says
most often to me is I don't knowhow to respond to that, and
that's what she's beenprogrammed to say when you swear
at her Right.
So I'm I am in trouble.

Speaker 4 (01:31:56):
So I say the most to you too, boss.

Speaker 2 (01:31:59):
I don't know how how much curb either of you are
watching.
I watched for years and thenskipped many seasons, Daphne
watched and now I've startedwatching this most recent season
and there's a great enthusiasmfor those.

Speaker 4 (01:32:12):
Sorry, sorry, yeah, no, you said yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:32:15):
But there's a moment where Larry David and I
generally don't deal with Siritoo much because it's more
trouble it's almost always moretrouble than it's worth.
But he starts to add, like getdirection someplace, and Siri is
completely fucking it up.
And he refers to Siri as a seeyou next Tuesday, which is a

(01:32:38):
word I never use.
But I laughed so hard.
I don't know why, like, but theidea of calling
disproportionately, yeah, likewhat?
But like he's trying to getdirections to lunch and Siri's
fucking up, I just laughed sohard.
So, anyway, that idea of like,engaging with Siri like a person

(01:33:01):
, like, for real.

Speaker 3 (01:33:03):
Oh, I get actively angry at her.
I know that she's not real, butalso I'm like God damn it, siri
, you, stupid, fucking bitchYou're wrong.
That's not what I asked you for.
God damn it, Siri.
I am a middle-aged white ladywith 17 national albums on you
on the database On you.
They live on your body.
They live on you, you know youknow God damn well, when I say

(01:33:27):
play WBEZ, which is our localNPR station, I am not asking to
hear easy by Chris Brown.
You fucking know it, youfucking know it, and you still
do that to me once a goddamnweek.
Just just play iRigLas, that'sall I'm looking for.

Speaker 2 (01:33:44):
Don't start.
No shit Won't be.
No shit, siri, amen.

Speaker 4 (01:33:49):
Well, this guy says my bad man, and he walks out and
then, coach, I want you to takeit from him because you had
such a wonderful response to therest of this.

Speaker 2 (01:33:58):
This is fun because I don't remember actually the
what my reaction was.
So let's go.
So the door closes, we cutdirectly to a really provocative
shot.
It's like the we're at the feetof a corpse, so you can
actually see the toe tag, whichthe whole time I had been
thinking about toe tags, becausethe feet, for some reason,

(01:34:20):
jumped out at me.
Their feet weren't covered,which makes sense.
And then we go to the shotagain underneath the gurney
where they've been hiding.
White sheet on both sides isactually quite pretty, with the
light diffusing through.
Blah, blah, blah.
So it is yeah, wait, I thinkit's okay to go from Wayne.
Wait, not yet.

(01:34:41):
And they've now.
They're now having this verytender moment.
And what hit me, I knew as soonas she grabbed his jacket.
I was like these two, mostappropriately, are going to have
their first kiss and fuckingmore.
I just like, I was like, Iresent this, like they are such

(01:35:07):
sweet kids, life has dealt themall the shitty things and of
course, of course, these twowould have this kiss in a morgue
, like, like, in a way, I feellike how could I believe?
Even before we got in here, youshould have been able to ask me
Orlando.
Where will they have theirfirst kiss?

(01:35:27):
And I should have been able toguess a morgue Right, yes, yes,
absolutely right.

Speaker 4 (01:35:33):
Well said coach, like what the fuck Anyway.

Speaker 2 (01:35:35):
so yeah, so we're there, we're on the table.
It's a very tender moment.
These two are so sweet, I justwant to bottle this shit.
And so my dad was differentbefore my mom died, so that's
also like speaks to why we'redelivering the Kooli now.
We all were, I guess, but right.
So she's trying to like explainhim.

(01:35:56):
I don't know, he wasn't alwayssuch a dick, or maybe he was,
and my mom made him less or orbetter or whatever.
But I mean, this is herreturning the intimacy of what

(01:36:17):
Wayne shared outside.
Yes, exactly Right.

Speaker 4 (01:36:21):
So she's not going to get it.

Speaker 2 (01:36:22):
You know what I mean If he goes.
I got no one, which is alsodeep because we know he's got
two brothers, but we also getwhat is meant by it.

Speaker 4 (01:36:34):
Yeah, but does she have them?
It's so interesting.
They're so vacuous and slightyou know what I mean Like
they're not.
At least Bobby Luchetti hassome sort of like anchor to him,
some sort of gravitas.

Speaker 2 (01:36:48):
Yeah, he's there.
To reality, it's on some level.

Speaker 4 (01:36:51):
They're like a happy meal.
You're just like.
Like they're merely disposableas humans.
You just go.
What are you?
All they do is repeat him oreach other.
They have no perspective.
You know they're nothing, ifnot like.
It's like a.
They're sort of what is theword I'm looking for?

(01:37:13):
What's the word boss?
Let's draw on a little D&Dknowledge, where you sort of
create minions if you're asorcerer or something that you
create like a constructs orsomething like that.
Well, whatever it is like.
If we're talking video gamejargon or D&D something, it's
like if you kill the sorcererwho created the things they

(01:37:35):
would evaporate to.
It's like what?
Are they?
Oh right, yeah right, the headvampire too, also right, correct
, that's the same thing.
So you understand, I think, whythey're not part of the
equation, and it's interestingthat it's a little bit of a
delayed reaction with Dell.
So when he opens up, right, shedoesn't get soft Like she is

(01:38:00):
very vulnerable here.
I don't know where the fuckthis comes from.
Oh boss knows, but it didn'thappen on the spot, it didn't
happen like in real time.
Her first natural reaction wasa defense mechanism.
Don't expect a fucking medal,right, because hardness is her
default setting.

(01:38:20):
It's only when she has a secondto actually be physically close
.
Maybe her love language istouched, maybe this physical
closeness softens her up.
Maybe the looming sort ofapproaching moment of giving the
koolie to her dad is startingto really nod her emotionally.

(01:38:45):
Whatever it is, she says, yeah,if he goes, I got no one.
Keep going here, coach.

Speaker 2 (01:38:52):
Well, hold on, because I'm super curious to
hear bosses take on where.
Yeah, because I felt like I sawa moment of connection there.
Sorry, go ahead.

Speaker 3 (01:39:03):
No, no, no, I was going to interrupt him, so thank
you.
I think the one thing is thatwe say normalize blah, blah,
blah too much, but normalizepeople's immediate reaction, not
being their genuine emotionalreaction to something Like,
especially in difficultsituations, you will go on

(01:39:23):
autopilot and do whatever ismost comfortable and then
discover what your emotionsabout that situation were later.
So sometimes you need a secondliterally to process it
especially because this is ahighly emotional moment for her.
So there's that, I think.
Also, I love the way that theydid this because I love a

(01:39:44):
channel Sunshine and SpotlessMind.

Speaker 2 (01:39:47):
So do I.

Speaker 3 (01:39:49):
And I also get very not annoyed.
But there's a scene whereClementine and Joel are they've
just first started dating theirin bed and they are under the
covers like literally havepulled the covers up over them
and they are talking about likedeep, important childhood
memories and it's supposed to bethis time when they connected,
really fell in love.

(01:40:10):
I think it was great when we sawthat in Eternal Sunshine of the
Spotless Mind and then itsomehow became a thing where,
it's like, in order to showtheir physical closeness, we're
going to show these two peopleunder the covers being close and
intimate with each other, andit's too much, we've seen it too
often.
This is a way that theyorganically got to the point
where you need to be physicallyclose underneath something

(01:40:33):
covered all around so that youare right in each other's faces
and it doesn't come off ascliched or weird.
The story called for it.
They had to do it.
I think that having a couple ofminutes of distance from what
he said and also now being thisphysically close and having to
deal with him is what promptedher to be able to talk about

(01:40:56):
this.

Speaker 2 (01:40:57):
I also think in terms of dealing with grief, which I
won't take us down that wholeroad, but there's something
about having something to do.
I've thought about this a lotover the last couple of years,
like all the rituals we had andwe've talked about this some,
but all the ritual we havearound death and this and that,

(01:41:18):
and if you're going to the packstore and then you're mixing the
drink and then you got todeliver the drink and then you
got to do, right, like there'san amount of movement that
allows you to not deal with thefact that you lost your mom for
reasons we still don't fullyunderstand, you didn't get to go

(01:41:38):
to the funeral, you're in amorgue, like talk about facing
death, right.
So I think the fact that she'sforced to stop it's almost like
the emotion catches up with herin this moment, because she
stopped Like she was out runningit and now she had to wait.

Speaker 4 (01:41:58):
Right, nice.
Yeah, no, that's exactly right,but it's definitely there, it's
palpable, it's clever how theygot here.
I like what Boss said aboutlike oh, the story organically
sort of called for it, but itwas written this way.
You know, it's like, but it'snot done in a way where it feels
forced, it just feelscompletely natural, totally by

(01:42:21):
it yeah, and then what happens,Coach?

Speaker 2 (01:42:25):
So, but you do now, though.
So he's basically declaring yougot me, and then he says right.
So then he's like I'm sayingyou got me, do you wanna got me?
Which I thought was reallygreat.
And that is the moment where wehave our kiss and they're just

(01:42:46):
again.
I just wanna bottle this, likein the midst of all this
insanity, they are just thesweetest.
So yeah, so we get that bit ofa push in from above them.
Well done In an interesting way.
It's passionate, but by that Idon't mean sexual, it's just
like a lot of emotion beingexpressed in this moment.

(01:43:11):
Absolutely it's powerful.

Speaker 4 (01:43:12):
Listen we waited seven episodes to get their
first kiss, yeah, and it feltworth it.

Speaker 2 (01:43:20):
And I love that there's a cut to guess whatever
movement we've got going onunderneath there.
Not putting that in a gross way, just there's some movement.

Speaker 4 (01:43:30):
There's camera movement, we push in and we pull
out.

Speaker 2 (01:43:32):
Yeah, and then the arm of one of the bodies I soon
wanna try to above them falls tothe side of the table in the
frame.
So I thought that again.
Just when you're like, oh, I'lljust sit here and enjoy all
this sweetness, like there'sthis reminder that there's a
whole story going on outside thesheets.

Speaker 4 (01:43:54):
Yeah, and then somebody some orderly starts to
move the actual table and he'sgot like his earbuds in and just
kinda grooving and moves themout and goes right past the I
don't wanna say Jay and SilentBob, jay and Sergeant.

(01:44:17):
Gellar, that's funny and they'retalking at the front desk.
Jay is saying please don'tembarrass me for that fine-ass
cafeteria lady.
As well done as the reason theywere under the corpse was.
I have no idea why the orderlyleaves the like a cadaver in the

(01:44:39):
middle of a aisle for a second,but he does.
And Gellar pops out Before that.
We hear Gellar is complainingabout the quality of the
ciabatta that he got and Jay islike nobody told you to get the
ciabatta.
He's like all right, I'm gonnago get a potato.
And so Gellar heads off to thecafeteria and Jay says make sure

(01:45:03):
you tell my girlfriend Beyoncein the cafeteria.
You know I'm looking forward tolunch tomorrow to Sarge.
This is all over top.
While Dell is sneaking intoBobby's room, she glances
through like the.
It has the type of a windowthat has like the chicken wire
fencing in it, like the securitywindow.

(01:45:23):
I don't know why, but shenotices that the person in the
next bed over from Bobby's roomis asleep.
Was this little girl there?

Speaker 2 (01:45:32):
Yeah, I didn't think that was a coincidence.
That was a very sweetfather-daughter scene comparison
.

Speaker 4 (01:45:40):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then we pan over to we havea camera, move over to follow
Dell's subjective camera,looking through the window and
we see Bobby is asleep in thebed.
He is restrained, he hasrestraints around his wrists and
he is on his back, head tiltedback.

(01:46:01):
He's sort of, you know,snorting and mucusy, like you
imagine anybody who lives in NewEngland area would be from all
the pollen, and he is messed up.
He looks like hell licks hislips.
He's fully asleep and Dellwalks in, she gets up the nerve

(01:46:25):
and she goes right next to thebed, puts the mixed Cape Cod
Cooley plastic bottle on thelittle sort of elevated tray
next to his bed and stands therewith her arms crossed.

Speaker 2 (01:46:36):
I just want to share quickly.
We don't have to discuss itbecause we've already talked
about this drink, but when sheput that bottle down and it said
pink grapefruit, I reallyretched, like I was like, oh my
God, it was even worse.
It was even worse.
This cream involved insomething that also has pink
grapefruit, like I, just like.

(01:46:59):
That was terrible.

Speaker 4 (01:46:59):
I really want to try it.
I'm dying to try it.
I want to just give it a whirl,just to see.
I want to be able to say, oh,that's rude, like Bradley.
Um, she stands right there andthen walk us through this boss.

Speaker 3 (01:47:14):
So Bobby wakes up, takes him a second to realize
Dell is in fact standing there.
She isn't necessarily happy tosee him but is glad that he is
responsive.
He says to Lila, she says hey,daddy, it's not a standoff.
Because she immediately saysbrought you a Cape Cod Cooley.
And he says, hey, you, um,takes him a second, you coming

(01:47:38):
home?
Because that's what he wantedto check about.
He didn't even say are you okay, like are you all right?
Are you coming home?
And we've discussed beforeabout how it's more a property
than anything else.
It just hammers home the factthat that is what he's most
concerned about.
What she says is the cops saidyou were dying.

Speaker 4 (01:47:59):
Yeah, you died.
And the cops said you're dying,yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:48:02):
Cops said you're dying.
He says cops lie.
Shockingly.
Can't believe Bobby Luchettiwould say that.
Um.

Speaker 2 (01:48:08):
I love that he's right, though, like also he's
right, but you're right.

Speaker 3 (01:48:11):
Yeah, no, also also.
He is in fact right.
And then Bobby looks over, seesWayne, starts getting upset,
says you, you motherfucker.
Now he's starting to like tryto against his struggle, against
his restraints.
What are you doing in mygoddamn room?
Well, come on.
And then Dowell grabs his handand says bye, daddy.
And he's screaming Teddy, Carl,she's up.

Speaker 2 (01:48:34):
I mean it's a second bye daddy, because that's what
she said on the back of the bikeone.
But also the minute he looksover and sees Wayne and says you
motherfucker, she moves.
She's like, oh, I know, like Ihave seen this movie, yes, but
it's not like she waits.
And is he like, is he gonnalike she knows exactly what he's
about to do and she's like wegotta get the fuck out of here

(01:48:56):
immediately.
So I just let those as much asthe Cape Cod Cooley was a
reality.
She knows her father, she knowsthat man.

Speaker 4 (01:49:06):
Yeah, and they back out.
She's by daddy Bobby'sscreaming wait, teddy Carl.
And he's screaming.
He's here, he's in the hospitalLike he's screaming nurse
Anybody that'll listen.
And they back out and we getthis great shot.
I really love this shot.
We got a shot of them backingout and then we see them look

(01:49:26):
down the hallway and we pivotand it's Geller coming back,
sergeant Geller coming back witha paper plate with an aluminum
wrapped potato on it.

Speaker 2 (01:49:37):
Because it's such, because I don't know when they
thought of it, but it's such aspecific thing to get.
If that had been a burger orthis or that, like you wouldn't
know what it is, but the fact hementioned that potato, you also
know, like it's just a specificthing to have to hold and
somehow it adds something to theabsurdity of this scene but

(01:49:58):
also like making it life.

Speaker 4 (01:50:01):
And what does he say Coach?

Speaker 2 (01:50:02):
Steady.
So he's like he knows.
You know that's a good place tostart with Wayne.
He says I just want to talkwhich cops lie, and then they
take off running.
He'll stop, but holes as he'srunning, he is holding, he
continues to hold the potato,and I don't know.

(01:50:23):
It adds a lot to the scene forme that he because it's to me
it's also that's true Like ifyou don't think about it.
I'm sure if you stopped him andthought do you need to hold on
to the potato or you can getanother potato, you'd be like,
of course, but in the course ofthat all happening you wouldn't
think to put the potato down.
You just don't run in afterthem.
So it works.

(01:50:45):
We go into what is looks likeMRI room and he's now got them
essentially cornered, which, aswe all know, the best thing to
do with a dangerous animal iscorner it.
So he said so.
Gellar says I'm here as afriend.
Yeah, which he?
I mean one, we know it's true.

(01:51:06):
But also Wayne does have to askhimself, like what's this guy
doing?
I mean, I guess he has thattime now to ask it, but like,
why is he here?
Like, it does seem like there'sgot to be an explanation beyond
.
I'm in trouble.
Um, my name is Sergeant StevenGeller.
I'm from Brockton, just likeyou.

(01:51:28):
Right, okay, everything's okay,let's not.
Let's not do anything crazy.

Speaker 4 (01:51:32):
He does move away from from the door coach, right
he?

Speaker 2 (01:51:35):
yeah, as he's saying that I'm not trapping you.

Speaker 4 (01:51:37):
I'm not trapping you.
He's smart enough to say likeall right, I am not getting
between you and the door.

Speaker 2 (01:51:41):
And he's got his hands up in the universal.
I mean, you know, harm, I comein peace.

Speaker 4 (01:51:47):
Just right, yep, um, I come from Brockton, just like
you.

Speaker 2 (01:51:52):
Eat town spa pizza.
So he's like this.
I mean, this is almost likelike a, a hostage negotiator,
like creating like a personalconnection and you know we're
all friends here Um.

Speaker 4 (01:52:04):
I love this.
He says I eat town spa pizzajust like you.

Speaker 2 (01:52:07):
And there we go.
Now.
Do you like town spa pizza?
Cape Cod Cafe is better, and itfrom Wayne, and Del finishes
the thought with buy a fuckingmile.
So they are on a side, like isit a great way to show Like they
are in sync, they are together.
Um, gellis has a lot of peoplewould agree with that.

(01:52:29):
So he's like all right, I gotyou.
I got you Now.
Look, wayne Dell, I'm here Nowas a police officer.
Are you a police officer?
He didn't realize.
He fucked that up.
Now he's got a new problem.
Not officially right now.
I'm a bit off the clock, so wedon't have to listen to you
officially right now.
Dell sort it out like what'sactually happened here.
He sighs, huh.

(01:52:49):
He realizes that he's introuble.
Look, I've done a lot ofthinking about what I was going
to say to you and now I don'tknow what I'm going to say to
you.
So he's really trying.
I mean, he is really trying.
He's here.
I want to give you somethingthat you've never been given.

(01:53:10):
What is that?
And that's a chance to get out.
And he points toward the door.
Even he's like listen, I'm nothere to harm you.
All right, before you getcaught up in the current of a
life you never wanted to beginwith.
He's laid it out there, but Ineed you to trust me.
And that's where it derails.
Trust you.
Cops lied and said my dad wasdying.

(01:53:33):
Yeah, okay, yeah, okay.
That's why I'm trying to help.
Once other police officers getinvolved, once you get down to
Florida, and I mean he knowstheir whole deal.

Speaker 4 (01:53:44):
Yeah, you know he understands their whole deal.
He says God knows whatever'swaiting for you down there.
You know he has been trackingthem, he's been trying to figure
out what this speech is goingto be.
And he says you know, I'mtrying to give you a chance
before you get caught up in life.
God knows whatever's waitingfor you down there.
And then we hear the machinekick on and coach keep going

(01:54:08):
here.
What, what happens?
Looks like Wayne gets anerection.
Is that what, right?

Speaker 2 (01:54:15):
So Wayne's jacket pocket starts to pull toward the
MRI machine Like we're dealingwith a magnetic field.
We see Dell's name plate, youknow, reached toward the, being
pulled also toward our Dellnecklace, the necklace of her.

Speaker 4 (01:54:35):
It literally the the charm on her neck this is Dell
is pulled.

Speaker 2 (01:54:40):
Yeah, it's like parallel to the ground almost.

Speaker 4 (01:54:41):
Yeah, it's great and we get an insert of the door
that says no metal allowed inthe room.
Right, right, so so.

Speaker 2 (01:54:50):
So we've got a new factor in this game.
And what's in the pocket, thathelp that is pulling Wayne
jacket, that famous hammer we'veseen all along.
And it turns out Gellar's gotsome metal of his own.
Because he at that point islike, all right, I'm going to
pull my gun because that's ahammer.
Look, wayne, steady Wayne, Iknow the kind of man.

(01:55:11):
Your father was Right.
And he gives up his gun.
He, he turns and allows the gunto to be pulled toward the
machine.
And Wayne holds up his hammer,quite Thor like actually.
And Gellar's telling them totake it easy.
And instead of taking it easy,wayne lets it go and allows the

(01:55:34):
forces of nature to do their job.
The hammer is pulled, clocksGellar between the eyes.
Third eye, third eye took a realshot.
Here comes Jay running.
Now he sees Gellar down, hegoes to get him.
God damn what happened.
They just left.
Go go.
He's reaching for his gun nowand off he goes.

(01:55:56):
He cocks the gun I mean, we are, he's got one in the chamber
and he's running after Wayne.
He bumps into Tweedlede andTweedledum.

Speaker 4 (01:56:03):
What is your problem?
What the fuck is your problem?
This is ridiculous.
These guys are so they, ofcourse, are in the way.

Speaker 2 (01:56:10):
And of course, miss Dell, like she may have walked
right by them, like they justleft right, so OK, and of course
, jay is still in his, in hishigh tension tensile strength,
hospital to hospital socks.
Right, right, right, right Right.
That's yes, so he's got.
He's got on the traction socks.
He better not try out on a wall.

(01:56:31):
He pushes them out of the way,runs outside, sees Wayne getting
on the bike with the jacket andthe hoodie and the whole thing.
He grabs Wayne off the bike,takes them down and it is our
new dad.
Wayne has apparently traded thebike for the car.
What's the guy's name?

(01:56:52):
Sorry, bradley.

Speaker 4 (01:56:53):
Bradley's.
So yeah, so Wayne is obviouslyarrangement is, but is.
But Bradley's got Wayne'sjacket on, he's got the bike
Right.

Speaker 2 (01:57:02):
Yeah, so this is yeah , so they.
They definitely wanted to throwwhoever came running out of the
hospital off the trail.
I got a little boy on the way.
I'm going to be a dad.

Speaker 4 (01:57:13):
Yeah, don't shoot me, bro.
I got a little boy on the wayI'm going to be a dad.
And then he realizes what hejust said to Jay and he puts his
head back on the concrete andhe says I'm going to be a dad.

Speaker 2 (01:57:25):
He repeats it like it's like it became real to him
in that moment and then he saysoutlaw and Jay gets up as a fuck
.

Speaker 4 (01:57:34):
And now listen, I was really impressed that Jay
tackled the guy on a bike.
I was like I was like a way togo, officer, can Eddie like
right, that was pretty.
That's, that's the husband.
He is it.
He is not a little boy, he isoff.

Speaker 2 (01:57:44):
He's not.
Yeah, he snatched him off thatbike.
Yeah, he really did.
And Brad has a smile on hisface, which I liked because he's
already expressed the holy shit, you know, I got somebody.
And then the next step of that,that's our last shot of Bradley
yeah.
Who.

Speaker 4 (01:58:02):
I think was a really fun character for all of us.
We all liked him and he's ahorse's ass, but super fun,
super fun, interesting, weird,whatever.
True to true to fact, true tohow this story goes.
And out comes Geller at a deadsprint.
And what does Jay say here,coach?

Speaker 2 (01:58:22):
They're gone, sarge, what do you think about your boy
now and Geller's bleeding fromhis forehead, where you got
clocked, and he says no morechances and that is not a great
sign.
So.

Speaker 4 (01:58:40):
I thought boss would really like that, because this
is this feels like your thing,boss, where it's like OK, listen
, I will try to be nice, butlike you, show me who you are,
I'm going to.
That's it, I it's.
I'm sure I would be like.
I don't think he meant to letthat hammer go.
Maybe maybe one more chance.
Maybe one one more chance.

(01:59:01):
That's funny.

Speaker 3 (01:59:04):
Well, you know, rewatching it.
I'm not sure if Geller actuallydid give his gun away.
I was going to say that too.
It was pulled from it.

Speaker 4 (01:59:14):
I thought I thought it was pulled from.

Speaker 2 (01:59:15):
I didn't think he did that Really.
I thought he did it to give itup.
I kind of like your way better,you're right.

Speaker 4 (01:59:20):
No, I kind of like your way better If he did.
I think that's really clever,but I thought he just I thought
it sucked it out of his handyeah, yeah, yeah, it could be.

Speaker 3 (01:59:27):
I think like to be fair, his police training
probably did catch kick in.
He saw somebody holding aweapon in this case, a hammer is
a weapon and he was like I gotto draw my fucking gun.
I think what I like most aboutthis scene actually is the
authenticity of the storytelling, that Dell and Wayne don't know

(01:59:52):
what Geller's motivations are.

Speaker 1 (01:59:54):
They don't know that he has been saying this kid
might need another chance.

Speaker 3 (01:59:58):
They know that the cops lie, the cops lied to get
them to the hospital and thatthey were wanted by the police.
So I'm not saying that Dell orthat Wayne was right to allow
the hammer to hit Geller in theforehead, but from his
perspective he doesn't know ifhe can trust him or not.
Us knowing is a different sortof insight that we have.

Speaker 2 (02:00:20):
Right.

Speaker 3 (02:00:21):
Their characters were reacting the way that I
expected them to, and inGeller's defense I do understand
that he would say no morechances.
It's like yeah, he has.
Wayne has a record of attackingpeople at school, of being a
delinquent, of not having astrong social support system.
As dad just died, there isn't alot of real.

(02:00:44):
Geller also doesn't knoweverything about Wayne to know
that he should be able to trustWayne in these ways.
And these are the things thathappen in real life.
Like you can have a story whereeverybody understands
everything about everyone elseimmediately.
That's not going to lead to alot of conflict, or often
conflict.
That seems very satisfying.

Speaker 4 (02:01:02):
It says last of season two.

Speaker 3 (02:01:04):
No, no, no, I didn't say it, I did not say it.
I did not say it, but that'sfine In this case.

Speaker 4 (02:01:13):
Serenity now.
Serenity now.

Speaker 3 (02:01:16):
But in this case you have people who are working with
reasonable understandings ofthe other person and making
mistakes and that happens inreal life all the fucking time.
So having it there.
Geller is not a bad guy forsaying no more chances.
Wayne isn't necessarily a badguy for letting the hammer hit
him in the forehead.
This is how conflict happensthat people are coming at issues

(02:01:38):
from the opposite sides andthat's making their actions
incompatible.

Speaker 4 (02:01:44):
And the fact that we get that defense from boss.
This is the thing I knew.
I just really love the show andthe fact that you can, without
much effort at all.
Well, you know, low effort iskind of a boss's motto you can
easily see.
It's not like you have to leapthrough hoops to go like, yeah,
I see why he would do it, I seewhat he would do it.

(02:02:05):
Like I totally, that's howstakes get set up and that's how
you as a viewer believe stakes,because you're like, yeah, this
is, this is the nature ofconflict.
Geller Geller dabs his foreheadand we zoom super tight, shot
into the hammer in his hand he'snow holding.
Where etched into the, thehandle is the name of our

(02:02:35):
titular character and it saysWayne and then we get the
compulsory splash screen thatsays Wayne and the music and
we're mostly out.
Right, that's usually end, butthey started out these little
fun buttons at the end.
That wasn't something that didit with every episode.

(02:02:55):
But, boss, walk us through thislast sort of little button.

Speaker 3 (02:03:01):
Oh, it's Bobby Luchetti, struggling as fiercely
as he possibly can, rattlingthe bed, shouting fuck, god damn
it, motherfucker.
Obviously because he needs togo rescue his daughter.
Oh wait, no actually he's justtrying to get the fucking cooly
Just so pissed that it's justout of his reach, just fast as
fingertips, and then heaccidentally knocks it off the

(02:03:23):
table and continues screaming.

Speaker 2 (02:03:25):
Quickly.
I'll toss this in because it'smore to the scene I think
deserves some conversation.
But I think it's alsofascinating that the thing he
wanted was almost within reachand it's his own inability to
manage his own emotions.
That is why he is not presentlyenjoying that delicious cave

(02:03:46):
car cooly, because she broughtit to him and would have given
it to him had she not had to runbecause he started screaming
that the motherfucker was in hisroom.
So it's just, you know, he's soin his own way.

Speaker 3 (02:03:57):
It can possibly begin to see it and if he hadn't been
an asshole beforehand, theywouldn't have restrained him in
the first place and that.

Speaker 4 (02:04:05):
It's an allegory for everything that's happening in
his life.

Speaker 3 (02:04:09):
Same reason that he got tased, like he just cannot
keep his shit together.

Speaker 4 (02:04:15):
It's really pretty.
And then what happens here,boss?

Speaker 3 (02:04:18):
Oh, and then the little girl from next door that
Luchetti has been talking shitabout the family the entire time
is standing in front of him.
She waves.
She's got a really cute littleflower headband too, like
Angelica and adorable.

Speaker 4 (02:04:33):
Yeah, I was going to say Angelica, a garland of white
flowers.

Speaker 3 (02:04:36):
Like she is angelic yes.
And she says hi, and he wavesback and then indicating
basically how much she wants thedrink Smiling at her, trying to
charm her.
This is the flip side of notbeing able to control his own
emotions.
Is that he is somehow able toconvince her to pick up the

(02:04:58):
drink.
Get him a straw so that hecould finally enjoy it.

Speaker 4 (02:05:03):
And yeah, the final shot is him sucking for Ollie's
worth out of one of those little.
You know the internal diameter,you know inside diameter of
those little crazy straws islike nothing.
It's like a Capri Sun sort ofstraw and he is sucking for

(02:05:24):
Ollie's worth and she's holdingthe thing for her.
But he did get managed to getthe cape.

Speaker 2 (02:05:30):
Well, it underscores sort of this function of the
whole story, right, like Delltells us that that's one of my
childhood memories is mixing upthis disgusting concoction for
my father so he could getplastered.
And then she goes and she doesit, and then he convinces yet
another child to give it to him.
So the crazy straw to me justis like yeah, just a bit of

(02:05:54):
highlighting of as a rule, let'snot engage children in our
drinking.
Just try that out, see how thatgoes.

Speaker 4 (02:06:07):
I mean unless you need to.

Speaker 3 (02:06:08):
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, I will fullyadmit, and this might, this
might just be the Chicago one inme, but like, yeah, no, don't
make your kid mix you the drinksto get you plastered.
But also I know a lot of standup, decent, good men who are
good fathers that would also sayto their kids hey honey, can

(02:06:29):
you go grab me a millen lightfrom the garage fridge, can you?
Can you go run?

Speaker 2 (02:06:34):
and grab that.
Yeah, I'll allow it.
I mean yeah, sometimes.
Yeah, it's not why you havekids to shag Bruce.

Speaker 3 (02:06:43):
I mean, there has to be something that you guys like
about him.

Speaker 2 (02:06:47):
Yeah, seriously.

Speaker 4 (02:06:52):
Well that you know.
Wait before we finish up.
I want to say did.
Are we meant to understand thatBradley had some of the Cape
Cod Cooley that's so rude drankthe rest of it, decided to make
the wrong choice.
And then officer J like was herunning?
Was it looked like he was?
Oh, I didn't.
And then officer J no, I didn'tthink so no.

Speaker 3 (02:07:14):
No, I didn't think so .
I thought that Wayne was likeyou would keep the bike and the
jacket, but like you have to gethim off of us, you're going to
have to be the decoy.

Speaker 4 (02:07:28):
That was so he didn't get money for it or something
like that.
You think no, he got the bikein the badass jacket.
He talked about how badass.

Speaker 3 (02:07:33):
The bike was Right, that's the that's and he had it
within the context of just getout of the road and fucking take
off.
Okay, I think that this is heis going to keep the bike and
become a club.

Speaker 2 (02:07:43):
I don't know how I decided this and I am now about
95% sure I made the shut up, butin my head Brad had a car and
they swapped.
He said I will give you thebike if you give me your car,
okay.
So I don't know where I gotthat from.

Speaker 4 (02:08:04):
Yeah, okay, well, well, shucks folks.
That is it for today.
That that is the.
The.
The blissful end of Wayne,episode seven, of the last
forever.
We will be back next time withWayne.
Episode eight must have burnedlike hell.
That is the title of theepisode.

(02:08:26):
I cannot wait, oh God, I am soexcited for everyone to watch
these last three.
I cannot wait to see coach andboss watching these.
You know, we should probably doa watch party.
Maybe we'll do a watch party onthe site.
Maybe we'll do that so we can,so people can watch with us if

(02:08:46):
they want to.
Let's think to see if we canfigure something like that out.
If anyone's interested in that,hit us up on the on the on the
community site, and we'll try tomake it happen.
It's just that these three areare so much fun it does.
I don't think it ends the waypeople think it's gonna end.
But you know, I I'm curious tosee how everyone imagines it'll

(02:09:09):
go.
But there's a lot, there's alot crammed into eight, nine and
, of course, 10, and that is it.
There is no more Wayne.
It'll never be made.
Everyone has aged out of theirroles by by about six or seven
years already.
So it is a, it is something abeautiful moment in time, and

(02:09:31):
we're so happy that you tookthis ride with us and got to
share these, these, you know,these, these conversations about
it with us.
Coach, where do people find youif they want to find you?

Speaker 2 (02:09:45):
Come through the community site.
Community site I've been, I'vebeen pumping this.
You gotta, you gotta like, yougotta subscribe.
You gotta tell your friends wegotta move up the list on Apple
Podcasts.
Let's, let's, let's make ithappen, folks, let's make it
happen.
We're not.
We're not far away.
There's no place like Richmond.

Speaker 4 (02:10:05):
You're darn tootin coach and boss.
What about you?

Speaker 3 (02:10:08):
I will also reiterate the community site and I
promise to be there more, alsoon threads, usually just
blocking people every once in awhile.
Dunking on some depends on theday.
On threads it is Emily dotchambers, dot 31 or blue sky,
which is Emily chambers.

(02:10:28):
I will again plug theantagonist, even though I've
been neglecting it.
That is antagonist blogcom.
If anybody wants to talk to meabout the 1997 movie a life less
ordinary by Danny Boylestarring Cameron Diaz and Ewan
McGregor, there is a similarplot point to the motorcycle.

(02:10:51):
It's one of my favorite incinema history.
So if anybody wants to watchthat and hit me up on any of
those places I will talk for along time about it.

Speaker 4 (02:11:00):
Don't write about that on the antagonist whatever
you do.
Just just don't, because thatwould be a really good thing to
read, just don't.
Just make sure you only talkabout it like offline, that's.
I love Danny Boyle, huge DannyBoyle fan.

Speaker 3 (02:11:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (02:11:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (02:11:16):
I really like him shallow, grave.
Not enough people saw thateither.

Speaker 4 (02:11:19):
No, no, he's, he's, he's legit.
Okay, that's it.
Thank you everybody.
We really appreciate youstaying with us and joining us
for all this, all thisconversation.
Like I said, next time we'll beweighing.
Episode eight must have earnedlike hell we are.
So here's where we are.
I want to give people the layof the land because I'm terrible
at that.
That's the now and not nownature of my ADHD coach.

(02:11:45):
Coach is always like wait, whatare we?
You should see behind thescenes when they're like coach
about like are we like what arewe?
What are we watching today?
Like what is it?
Oh, oh, oh, I thought you couldread my mind, sorry.
So, yeah, we're going to comeback.
What we're trying to do isfinish up Wayne and Ted Lasso.
The fine, we're in the finalepisode of Ted Lasso, season two

(02:12:06):
.
We have that to finish up.
We have eight, nine and 10 ofWayne to finish up.
I can't say what order we'regoing to do them in.
I lean toward blasting outWayne First.
I've made a tentative agreementwith coach because he you know
when you you have actual friendsthat that push back and stuff.
So I'll be like hey here's myidea.
And he's like I'm gonna, youknow, let me run something by

(02:12:28):
you.
He's just like so he wants todo a little bit of Wayne and
then finish up Ted Lasso andthen finish up Wayne.
I don't know what we're goingto do, but we're going to finish
them up generally in tandem andthen, and then we'll be able to
open our next show, which wehave not announced yet, but it's
great and it's going to be alot of fun.

(02:12:49):
That show is going to be.
We might make, we might makeboss cry, if we can.
We might, we might, I don'tknow.
Might might be something we do.
Ok, so that is it.
Thank you for supporting us.
Please like and subscribe anddo the review thing and do the.
You know anything you can do tohelp help.
The podcast really helps.
We're really close to sort ofleveling up and as much support

(02:13:13):
as we can get really makes aworld of difference.
I know that I look at thenumbers and I can see you know
sort of who's what.
I can't see who you are, Icannot see that, but I can see
the numbers and what peoplewatch and I know that many of
you have been with us from thebeginning and that you have

(02:13:34):
listened to hundreds I don'tthink we're in thousands yet.
I should add up all the hours.
I don't think we're inthousands yet, but it's hundreds
and hundreds of of hours oflistening to us platter.
If you if you can can getyourself to subscribe and you
try to divide that number by thethree, the minimum payment is

(02:13:56):
three dollars a month.
If you can do three dollars amonth for the hundreds and
hundreds of hours that you'veseen, it must come out.
I'm not so good at math, boss,but it's got to be.
It's got to be a reasonable fee, I would think.
Is that right?

Speaker 3 (02:14:11):
I can put it in a spreadsheet and let you know,
but I have no idea.
Yeah, please don't.

Speaker 4 (02:14:15):
But but in general, if you, if you're able to, and
say you know what, I'll throwthese idiots a bone Every little
bit really, really, reallyhelps that you wouldn't believe
how the numbers work behind thescenes and what it means if you
a lot of you listen and only Ithink 80 percent of our
listeners, who listen everysingle time, are actually

(02:14:36):
subscribed.
So if you're in the 20 percentthat haven't just checked the
box to subscribe, please do that.
We'll automatically come intoyour feed and also it helps our
numbers.
Every little bit helps and wereally appreciate it.
So we'll be back next time.
Until then, please support yourlocal libraries and the written
word and until Wayne, episodeeight must have burned like hell

(02:15:00):
we are rich, rich rich.
We finally get enough.
Yeah, forever Right.
And forever.

(02:15:21):
Okay, thanks everybody, we'llsee you next time.

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Wayne | S1 Ep7 Part2 "It'll Last Forever"

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