August 2, 2025 • 55 mins
In this deeply moving episode, Bryan is joined by special guests Connor Rynning and his wife Annie for a raw and redemptive conversation about wandering far and being called home. Connor's powerful testimony is a story of rebellion, brokenness, and ultimately, the relentless love of God.
Connor shares his journey from pride, addiction, and spiritual numbness to a moment of radical transformation. Through heartbreak, loss, and searching in all the wrong places, Connor eventually heard the Shepherd’s voice calling him back.
Matthew 18:12 – “Does he not leave the ninety-nine... and go in search of the one that went astray?”
📺 Be sure to check out Bryan's new YouTube channel: Simplicity in the Journey for more testimonies, teaching, and encouragement.
Connect with Bryan at thetestimonypodcast.com
Youtube: @simplicityinthejourney
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 02 (00:00):
Welcome to the Testimony Podcast.
My name is Bryan.
What a fantastic episode wehave today.
We have got my friend Connorand his wife Annie.
(00:26):
You want to say hello?
Hey, what's going on?
We are talking about theprodigals today.
The sheep that are lost, thatare wandering, that are alone,
that need to hear the voice ofthe shepherd.
And in fact, that's today'sepisode title.
And it is the voice of theshepherd, a prodigal story.
And I have got a fantasticstory on the hook today for
(00:47):
everyone to listen to out there.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
And we're really excited to bebroadcasting Hey, what's going
on
Speaker 01 (01:03):
everybody?
My name is Connor Rynning.
I'm originally from Worcester,Massachusetts, and I'm now
living in Oklahoma City with mywonderful wife, Annie, who's
sitting to the left of me.
I met Bryan, I want to say liketwo months ago.
at a thing called the jesusgathering my father-in-law met
(01:26):
him and was like man this guy'sgot something on him he's like
you got to go talk to him allright let's see what happens and
uh well here i am sitting todayin this room with him recording
this and uh we've beenfellowshipping a lot i'm just
really excited about all thethings that are going on in our
community
Speaker 02 (01:41):
Yeah, God is so good.
We're really experiencing a lotof personal revival, community
revival, some amazing times offellowship together here in
Oklahoma City.
Just a lot of things happeningin the body of Christ right now,
some unification that'shappening.
I know my last podcast wastalking about unity in the body
of Christ.
We're actually seeing it startto happen all around us.
We're seeing these amazing homegroups gathered together.
(02:03):
They're sort of interweavingand kind of intermingling, and
the body of Christ is reallystarting to flow and function.
And I pray that that is aacross the country, across the
world, wherever this is beinglistened to.
And I'm just really, reallyblessed by what I'm seeing
happen in the body of Christ.
One of the reasons that I'vetaken some time off from the
testimony podcast, in caseyou're wondering, for all of my
(02:24):
faithful listeners out there, isI actually started a YouTube
channel with my wife and myfamily.
And so I'm going to give aquick shout out to the YouTube
channel.
It is called Simplicity in theJourney.
So go ahead and look forSimplicity in the Journey on
YouTube.
Connect with me there.
Check out my videos.
Go ahead and like, subscribeand share and comment on those
(02:45):
videos as well.
If you've been a longtimetestimony podcast listener, but
this is the first time thatyou're reaching out, go ahead
and subscribe to the channelbecause we're going to have some
great content coming up.
We're going to be right back,nose to the grindstone with the
testimony podcast.
It's still a passion of mine,but I wait until the perfect
testimony to record.
And when I hear it, I have toget it recorded.
And so I have brought Connorhere to talk about his story.
(03:07):
And I know that he wants toopen up with a scripture first.
So I'm going to let him getthat I just wanted to open up
with
Speaker 01 (03:30):
Matthew 18, 12.
What do you think if a man hasa hundred sheep and one of them
has gone astray, does he notleave the 99 on the mountains
and go in search of the one thatwent astray?
So that scripture to me isreally, it's my story and it's a
lot of people's stories in thebody of Christ.
And so when I was younger, myfather had gotten saved when I
(03:54):
was maybe 12 years old.
There was a lot of turmoil inmy family before then, a lot of
fighting, a lot of things thathappened.
just really weren't great towitness as a young man.
It kind of shapes how you thinkabout your father.
It shapes how you see yourfather.
My father had made the choiceto follow Christ.
(04:16):
And just one day, you know, hecame home and he was like, yeah,
I follow Jesus now.
And I'm a different man.
And to me, it felt reallysuperficial in the moment.
And I was like, I don't reallybelieve this.
Uh, why, why now are you justbetter than everyone else?
(04:36):
You know, that was kind of howI was thinking.
So, um, he would always bringme to Bible studies and, um,
there was everyone there, youknow, speaking in tongues and
all this other stuff.
And I'm like, I have no ideawhat's going on, but I just
don't buy it.
Um, and when I was maybe 13, I,I gave my life to the Lord, but
(04:58):
in that moment, it really meantnothing to me.
Um, I was just doing it reallyto please my dad.
And as time went on, myfather's faith really grew
stronger and stronger and I justdrifted further and further and
further away from all of it.
I was always really prideful ineverything that I did.
(05:22):
I always couldn't really bewrong when it came to certain
things.
I just believed what I did andI was gonna do whatever I wanted
to do whenever I wanted to doit and I really felt no
convictions over anything thatwas going on in my life um so it
had been probably you know 15years of me doing that um and I
(05:47):
was this was 2023 um I had justlost a lot of weight and um I
was kind of feeling myself andum I was just really off doing a
lot of stupid things and justdoing really a lot of like
(06:10):
cocaine.
I was drinking a lot.
I just never really couldfigure out why nothing would go
my way.
Just putting all of my faithreally in myself and just
getting so frustrated when Icouldn't figure out why my life
(06:30):
was the way it was.
So, um, things took a prettydrastic turn when I had met this
girl and I was definitely indeep lust in this situation.
And, um, I had gotten herpregnant, she got an abortion
and that just totally, uh,rocked my world.
(06:53):
Um, I just felt horrible aboutthe whole thing.
And, um, I kept me up at night,um, I was just depressed.
I was drinking to the pointwhere I would get in my truck
and I would think in my head,man, I really wouldn't mind if I
just crashed right now anddied.
(07:14):
Just nothing could reallyconsole my soul.
It was just like deep tormentin my heart all the time.
And I just remember it was justeating me up and eating me up
and eating me up.
And one day I just called mydad, and I just confessed it to
(07:37):
him.
And I was so nervous.
I was like, man, he's going torip me a new one.
But I got the complete oppositereaction, actually.
He just told me, son, I loveyou, and everything's going to
be okay.
And that was probably...
I didn't know it at the time,but that was the first time I
(07:59):
really felt the love of thefather through, um, through my
dad.
Like I felt like God's love forme through my father speaking
that.
And, um, I just remember likeit silenced the storm almost
immediately.
Um, so after all that hadhappened, um, I was still
(08:20):
drinking heavily and I was also,um, doing a lot of like
mushrooms and stuff like that totry to get spiritual, I guess
you could call it.
I don't know if that's reallywhat I was.
I mean, that's for sure what Iwas looking for, but I was
looking for it still in thewrong place.
Um, and at the time I was, um,I was a chef for my dad's
(08:41):
business and every year, um, theJesus gathering would come to
Boston and they would put on a,um, a tent revival.
And my dad, um, had met he'snow actually my father-in-law
crazy um but my dad was friendswith um the guy who puts it on
(09:02):
his name is john rutkay um andmy uncle ken was also friends
with him and this other guy mattwhalen um and so they started
coming to boston and i would goevery year and i would cook for
it that would be like the goodthing i did for the year you
know uh
Speaker 02 (09:19):
your penance yeah for your life of sin
Speaker 01 (09:21):
yeah
Speaker 02 (09:22):
You know, and before you continue on really quick,
as you were talking and you weretalking about your father and
like how receiving your father'slove in that moment, like God
loving you through your father,like gave you some peace in that
initial moment.
And you kind of hadn'tprocessed that you're
experiencing God reaching outthrough your father.
You know, I was reminded of thescripture in 1 Peter 4, 8, and
(09:47):
it says, love covers a multitudeof sins.
And like, here you are lost inall of your sin and all of your
shame and all of yourhelplessness and God's love
reaching through.
Like you felt, you felt acovering of your sin
momentarily, you know, becausewe, you know, in order for our
sins to be covered completely,we have to, you know, obviously
(10:08):
accept Jesus Christ and be setfree, but you're, you're feeling
comforted because your, yoursins felt covered in that moment
by God's love.
And you felt that.
And like, I just wanted to,encourage anyone out there
listening, if you're connectingwith Connor's story because
you're lost in that sin, Godloves you.
He's not mad at you.
(10:29):
He wants to cover you with Hislove right now.
And I just believe by theSpirit that you're feeling a
tangible comfort come upon you,like, you're feeling the comfort
that Connor felt from hisfather.
Cause you're, you're hearingthe love of, of the father
through this podcast right now.
So anyways, I had to interruptyou there.
Sorry to interrupt your story,but no, I mean, that was,
Speaker 01 (10:51):
that's totally my prayer for this whole entire
thing is that people realize.
So what, what I really realizedthrough all this, I'll get to
the whole part of it, but I justwant to sum it up right now
quickly, um, was, um, there wasnothing that i could have ever
(11:12):
done to fix my problems and um ibasically just toiled and
toiled and toiled and spiraledand just kept spiraling until i
was radically saved by god andit it just really takes one one
(11:35):
touch really from the father Ibelieve to open your heart to
the reality of Jesus came anddied for our sins.
And it's not just for oneperson.
He didn't do it just for me.
He's doing it for anyone who'shearing this that needs to hear
(11:55):
that.
That he died for you as well.
That you don't need to put on aworldly act for the people
around you for them to love you.
Cause that's something I reallystruggled with was if, uh, you
know, I always had in the backof my head, I always kind of
knew God was real, but I never,uh, had the, um, I was just
(12:18):
afraid.
I was afraid of man.
I was afraid, uh, I'd lose allmy friends.
I was afraid people would thinkI was weird.
Um, and I was just totallydeceived by the devil through
all that.
Um, so back to the story, um,so i'm cooking once a year at
this thing and uh now my he'snow my father-in-law but he's in
(12:41):
the back and i'm in the kitchenand he's throwing body blows at
me you know just prophesying tome um just telling me over and
over you know what are you doingwhy aren't you following jesus
why are you wasting your timehe's like there's uh just you're
just wasting your time and um inever really listened to him i
(13:03):
would just be like yeah allright buddy You know, why don't
you go tell someone else whocares?
And, um, it took, so it was thethird year and I had met this
guy.
He lives in Oklahoma now.
Um, and he didn't even talk tome about Jesus.
He just had a bro conversationwith me.
(13:25):
He was just talking to me aboutbow hunting, um, and just
outdoor stuff like that.
And at the time, um, I wastotally obsessed with
Yellowstone, and I wanted to bea cowboy.
Speaker 02 (13:39):
Don't we all?
I used to love spaghettiwesterns back in the day, like
Clint Eastwood movies.
That was me.
Speaker 01 (13:47):
So I was super into that, and he's just like, yeah,
man, why don't you come outhere, and you should bow hunt
with me.
We can go do all this coolstuff.
And I was like, yeah, yeah,yeah, sounds good.
I got to go, though, becauseI'm actually about to go to a
party.
I'm going to go drink.
My sister had met his wife.
I think two years prior to usmeeting in San Diego at a Jesus
(14:08):
gathering.
And his wife reached out to mysister or my sister reached out
to his wife.
I can't remember which one itwas credit to whoever it was.
She sent my sister, his numberand my sister sent it to me and
said, Hey Connor, I feel likeyou need to reach out to him.
Just talk to him about bowhunting or whatever.
(14:30):
So I was like, okay, yeah,sure.
I'll do that.
Just some random guy.
He was very random, yes.
I had met him for five minutes.
And I don't know.
It's just something about him.
I trusted him.
Speaker 02 (14:43):
So just reach out to this random guy that lives in a
different state.
Yes.
See if you can fly out and meetup with him.
Speaker 01 (14:48):
Yes.
Okay.
Just trying to follow you.
Yes, that is what happened.
So, yeah.
So I get this random guy'sphone number from Oklahoma.
And I'm living in Massachusettsat the time.
And I text him.
I'm like, hey, Rob, it's Connorfrom Boston.
Would you still want to bowhunt with me?
(15:10):
And I didn't have a bow.
I had never bow hunted before.
He didn't bow hunt either.
I learned this later.
But he's like, yeah, man.
He's like, get a plane ticket.
Come on out.
And I was like, okay.
You know what?
This feels really crazy.
(15:30):
But for some reason, it feelsreally right.
So I just bought a plane ticketand the next day I saw my dad
at work and I was like, Hey dad,I was like, man, you should
come bow hunt with me.
Like that'd be so cool.
Father, son going bow hunting.
Like not a lot of people can dothat.
Yeah.
My dad's like, no, I'm notgoing to do that.
(15:50):
He doesn't hunt either.
He doesn't own a bow.
And the next day he comes intowork and he goes, you know what,
Connor, I'm going to come withyou.
dude, that's so cool.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
What a good dad.
Yeah.
So shout out dad, if you'relistening.
Yeah.
Shout out Bob.
Um, and I was so stoked.
And I remember my boss who, um,he looked at me and he goes,
(16:11):
Connor, you know, a lot ofpeople would kill for a father
like that.
And I was like, wow, you know,it really put it into
perspective for me.
Um, and, um, so we got theseplans to go.
My dad told me, um, after all,everything went down, but he
wasn't going to go.
(16:31):
But that night the Lord hadspoken to him and said, you need
to be in Oklahoma cause this iswhere your son's going to
surrender to me.
Wow.
So my father, um, in totalfaith and what he had heard, uh,
the Lord say just bought a bowand a plane ticket and he's
trusting me to meet this randomguy in Oklahoma.
(16:51):
So that's where the adventurestarts.
Um, There's like a couple ofweeks before and I'm still doing
the same old things.
I'm drinking.
It was strange.
I was smoking a lot of pot, butI had felt conviction over it
and I wasn't sure what it was.
I would just feel really guiltyabout it.
(17:13):
And I was like, man, I justdon't like this anymore.
But
Speaker 02 (17:17):
it's like you started feeling God's
conviction, you know, thedrawing of the Lord, the, kind
of realization of your sin, theemptiness that you were feeling.
And it was like a drawing thatwas happening.
It's really interesting becauseyou're talking about going bow
hunting and like, you know, yourdad having to buy a bow.
And I was reminded of Psalm 38.
It says, Oh Lord, rebuke me notin your anger, nor discipline
(17:39):
me in your wrath for your arrowshave sunk into me and your hand
has come down on me.
There is no soundness in myflesh because of your
indignation.
There's no health in my bonesbecause of my sin for my
iniquities have gone over myhead like a heavy burden.
They're too heavy for me.
And it's like, that's like whatyou were experiencing.
(17:59):
Yeah.
It's really good.
Speaker 01 (18:01):
Yeah.
It was a hundred percent thatwe're leaving to go.
And this was kind of my lasthurrah.
I remember I had eaten a potgummy on the plane.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, naturally.
I had to do one more bad thing.
And I'm sitting next to my dad,and I'm like, man, why am I
(18:23):
doing this?
I felt pretty guilty about it,but it was what it was.
We get to Oklahoma, probably 3in the morning, and it's pitch
black out.
I can't really see anything.
I see a bunch of cowboystatues, and I'm like, all
right, where am I at?
Yeah, I must be in Oklahoma.
Unknown (18:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (18:41):
So we get to our hotel.
It's probably 2 in the morning,and we're supposed to meet up
with this guy I've known forfive minutes.
Were you like, why are therecars?
I thought they were all horses.
Yeah, I was very confused bythat.
This is not at all what Iexpected.
Yeah, I was like, I want mymoney back.
So...
(19:05):
I'm supposed to meet up withthis guy.
I'm kind of nervous.
I'm like the random strangerthat you flew out to meet.
I'm like, okay.
Um, you know, please don't letme get murdered.
Um, traffic.
I got to Oregon stolen.
I got two guys with me, so itcan't be that bad.
You know, if he tries to getus, we'll get them, you know?
Yeah.
That's my thought.
Um, so we wake up at likeprobably four in the morning, so
(19:28):
two hours of sleep and we go tomeet him at a Walmart parking
lot.
Speaker 02 (19:33):
Okay.
Unknown (19:34):
Um,
Speaker 01 (19:34):
And it was probably zero degrees, if not colder,
outside.
And I'm just really wondering,what am I doing here?
Like, really, what am I doinghere?
Am I here to bow hunt, or whyam I here?
This question was really risingin me.
(19:54):
And he was about two hours lateto meeting up with us.
Shout out, Rob.
Oh, nice.
Way to be two hours late, Rob.
Yeah.
Shout out.
He's working on it.
We love him.
Yeah.
Sure do.
And I know where you, I knowwhere you live now.
So it makes me a little moremad that you were two hours
(20:15):
late, but it's besides thepoint.
Cause you said what?
He's like five minutes awayfrom where you're supposed to
be.
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (20:21):
Five, five minutes.
Speaker 01 (20:22):
Yeah.
So, so we meet up, he takes usout to this land and I'm like
just enthralled with the place.
I'm like, man, this isbeautiful.
Super stoked.
It stunk because it was supercold.
We sat out there for a littlewhile.
Nothing really happened.
(20:43):
And then the next day, that'sreally when the fireworks
started going off.
So we get up super early again.
Rob was going to be late.
So he just told us to meet himout there.
So we're out there and I'msitting in this blind by myself.
In the middle of nowhere,Oklahoma.
(21:06):
And that question came back up.
It's like, you know, why am Ihere?
What am I doing here?
And I just remember in thatmoment, all the birds started
chirping.
Everything was just loud in myears, vibrant, beautiful noise.
And like this piece just likefell over my whole entire body
(21:30):
and my being.
And I was like, whoa.
It's like, what is this?
Like, this is, I've never feltlike this much peace before in
my life.
And then Rob showed up and abunch of deer to start flying
around the place and my heart'spumping.
And I really only knew like oneworship song by heart.
(21:56):
And, you know, it's starting todawn on me that God had
something to do with me beingthere.
you know?
Speaker 02 (22:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (22:03):
So I start singing this song and it's, our God is
an awesome God.
And I'm just singing that in myhead for, I'm not joking,
probably two hours straight, um,just over and over and over and
over.
And finally, um, I see threedeer up on this hill and, um,
(22:23):
like the first thing that poppedin my head, you know, not
really being a believer oranything like that, but I was
just like, oh, the Father, Son,and the Holy Spirit.
The trinity of deer appeared.
So I'm watching them come in,and they get close enough where
I draw my bow back, and I'm justsitting there, and my heart is
(22:44):
pounding through my chest.
And they weren't like big deer,but you know if you know, when
you see a deer for the firsttime in your hunting, it's like,
whoa.
It blows your mind how excitedyou can get.
Um, so they got close enoughand I shot and I missed, it went
right under its belly.
And, uh, I ran out to go checkmy arrows.
(23:05):
See, Hey, maybe I did hit it.
Maybe there's blood.
Um, I didn't hit it.
And I guess I've never huntedbefore.
So I didn't know what to do.
You're not supposed to do that.
So if you miss, don't go chaseafter your arrow.
Um, learn from his mistake.
So they all left and I'm kindof disappointed.
I'm like, I don't know when I'mgoing to get this opportunity
(23:26):
again.
But I remember my dad beinglike, it's okay.
I think there's something elsein store for today.
And I was like, all right,whatever.
So a little preface to what I'mabout to say.
The week before we went outthere, I was talking to my
sisters, and I was like, man, Ijust wish a dog would show up
(23:47):
and I could just take it.
And this will make sense.
Yeah.
And my sister's like, yeah,that'd be pretty cool.
I just want
Speaker 02 (23:56):
to steal a dog.
Speaker 01 (23:58):
I didn't steal.
So we come out of the woods.
It's like negative 10.
It got colder.
Kept getting colder, of course.
And I opened the door to get inthe truck to leave.
And I looked down and there'sjust this little dog laying at
my feet.
And I was like, what?
(24:19):
I'm like, this guy needs help.
So I picked him up.
I put him in the truck.
I went and got him like a bunchof donuts or something.
I brought him to the shelter,but I knew that dog was mine.
But looking back on that momentnow, what I see is God was
painting a picture of me comingto his feet and surrendering
(24:46):
just like the dog did.
He was sick.
He was hurting.
He was lost.
And he just needed someone tolove him.
And, um, that was just, it'sjust a powerful picture that God
painted with that dog.
Um, so we had to bring him tothe shelter and I went onto the
(25:06):
shelter and I was like, Hey,listen, like, uh, whatever you
do, do not kill this dog.
Like I promise you, I will beback and I will get this dog.
And they were like, yeah, yeah,get out of here.
They actually startedthreatening me.
with legal stuff saying I waslying about where I got the dog
and all this weird stuff.
But that's besides the point.
(25:27):
But he did not steal the dog,people.
Speaker 02 (25:29):
I didn't steal the dog.
The dog showed up and itcollapsed at his feet like we
need to collapse at the feet ofJesus.
Yes.
Speaker 01 (25:37):
So weird enough, her dad had heard that me and my
dad and my uncle were going tobe in town And they were
scouting a location for theJesus gathering.
So it all worked out that like10 of the best evangelists I
(25:58):
know were in town when I wasthere.
What a coincidence.
And they were happening to havea worship and prayer night.
Wow.
So my dad's like, hey, theyinvited us to come over.
And I'm like, well, I'm here,right?
Can't go anywhere.
(26:18):
Might as well
Speaker 02 (26:20):
go.
Um, and let me just hear fromAnnie really quick.
So like when this is all goingon, like what do you know of
Connor and what, what is yourkind of experience at this
point?
Speaker 00 (26:31):
Um, we were just friends at that point.
So he, um, a little backstory.
We met that Jesus gathering inBoston, um, couple of months
prior to him coming to
Speaker 02 (26:46):
Oklahoma.
Okay.
The one where he, he texted.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
That random guy, Rob was there.
Okay.
Speaker 00 (26:52):
Yeah.
So I met him there and, um, Iknew of him before I met him
because I was really goodfriends with his two sisters and
I was, I loved his parents.
I just had never met him.
Um,
Speaker 02 (27:08):
had you heard stories about him?
Speaker 00 (27:10):
I heard that his dad approached my dad and was like,
uh, Hey, yeah.
So Annie and Connor's probablyme.
Speaker 02 (27:18):
Really?
Okay.
All right.
Speaker 00 (27:21):
Yeah.
And my dad's response at thetime was absolutely not.
Speaker 02 (27:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 00 (27:30):
So I was there in Boston and I remember my, I
remember seeing Connor.
I'm like, Oh, that's Connor.
Okay.
Well, interesting.
Unknown (27:38):
Um,
Speaker 00 (27:39):
And my dad was like, Annie, go introduce yourself.
Like he's just get back there.
And I just was so nervous.
I'm like,
Speaker 01 (27:46):
Oh, very nervous.
Speaker 00 (27:48):
I don't remember what I said, but we maybe talked
for 20 seconds and I just wordvomited the whole time.
Speaker 01 (27:54):
Yeah.
She scared me.
That's so funny.
I can, I can recount what shesaid.
She looked me in the eyes andgoes, would you ever move to
Oklahoma city?
And I was like,
Speaker 00 (28:04):
Okay.
It's making it sound way morecreepy.
Why would
Speaker 01 (28:07):
you say that?
It's like, what?
And I think I said, no.
Speaker 02 (28:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (28:14):
You said we're moving a
Speaker 02 (28:14):
little fast.
I just
Speaker 01 (28:15):
met
Speaker 00 (28:18):
you.
Speaker 01 (28:19):
No, it was a little prophetic there.
Yeah.
Cool.
Speaker 00 (28:22):
Well, so yeah, he, we ended up following each other
on social media and he hadmessaged me and was like, Hey,
yeah, I'm going to come outthere to Oklahoma to go bow
hunting.
I was like, what the heck?
That's so random.
Um, okay.
Who are you coming with?
And he was like my dad and myuncle Ken.
And so I called up my dad.
(28:43):
I'm like, Hey, like they'recoming out here.
Like, why don't you plan a tripout here?
And that led to my dad callinga whole lot of other people, the
troops and
Speaker 02 (28:54):
the divine setup was on.
Speaker 00 (28:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (28:57):
Okay.
So fast forward.
So you're, you're In the room,you show up with all the
evangelists and the worshipnight and it's all kicking off.
What's happening in your brain?
Speaker 01 (29:06):
So I am thinking, whoa, this is really weird.
To be honest, that was mythought.
I was like, whoa, this isweird, but it's not weird.
It was probably just the evilthings inside of me trying to
make me.
And I started settling in andthe worship music starts getting
(29:29):
more intense and more intense.
And I start kind of singingalong and getting into it.
And then this girl just burstsout at the top of her lungs,
just belting, our God is anawesome God.
And I mean, I guess the songjust got like remixed by Phil
(29:53):
Wickham, but at that point intime, nobody was singing this
song.
Yeah.
So I was, my mind was blown bythat.
And, um, it was cool before itwas cool.
Yeah.
And it just showed, I was like,Whoa, my God knows exactly what
I'm thinking.
You know, like he's making itknown to me that he knows what
I'm thinking.
(30:13):
Yeah.
This random stranger.
Speaker 02 (30:14):
Yeah.
That song was for you
Speaker 01 (30:16):
and it came out of her, her heart.
Yeah.
Um, so in that moment I knewthat Jesus was real, that he
loved me.
I got down on my knees and Igave my life to the Lord right
then and there.
I got baptized in the HolySpirit.
They immediately brought me toMarco.
(30:39):
Marco is my brother-in-law.
They brought me to his houseand they baptized me in his hot
tub.
Nice.
So I could not get away.
Speaker 00 (30:48):
Keep it in the family.
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (30:51):
Go
Speaker 01 (30:52):
to Marco's hot tub.
Speaker 00 (30:54):
Quick.
Speaker 01 (30:56):
That's not something you hear every day.
Yeah.
And Rob capped it all off.
He read the parable of the lostsheep to me.
And it just hit me so hard thatI was truly so lost.
And I tried everything, everyway.
(31:19):
to try and console myself, makemy life work the way I wanted
it to.
I tried everything but followJesus.
And as soon as I said yes toJesus, he started just pouring
out into my life, justabsolutely pouring out into my
(31:40):
life and just redeemedeverything that I had lost.
He redeemed everything so muchtime that was stolen by the
enemy um and he's just been sofaithful through the whole
entire thing so as soon as i gotsaved the lord spoke to me
(32:07):
quite frankly and told me tomove to oklahoma city wow um and
i was like okay through annieNo, I'm just kidding.
I had nothing to do with that.
So I'm like, okay, Lord, ifthis is you, I need witness.
(32:27):
So I went to my parents' housechurch.
I mean, as soon as I got home,I was going to church Wednesday
and twice on Sundays.
I was just going crazy for theLord.
And I went to this house churchand I think six people, had a
word for me that they saw meriding horses in the Midwest and
(32:51):
doing the Lord's work in theMidwest somewhere.
So that's amazing.
I said, okay, I'm like a weekinto this, but sure, let's do
it.
So I told everyone I knew I'mmoving to Oklahoma city.
They're like, what's your plan?
(33:11):
I was like, I don't have one.
My plan is whatever God wantsfor me.
Um, and I just never strayedfrom that.
Um, I just kept seeking him andseeking him.
Um, I never even made a plan.
I just remember it was abouttwo weeks before I was supposed
(33:32):
to leave and I had nowhere tolive.
And, um, I was just praying andpraying and praying and I'm
like, God, I know you want me todo this.
I just need you to show mewhere to go.
Um, And then my wife, she's nowmy wife, but she wasn't then,
texted me and she said, Connor,why don't you live at Marco's
house?
And I was like, he's got a hottub.
(33:53):
I was like, that's not bad.
I was like, are you sure?
And then he invited me to liveat his house.
Wow.
So Rob actually flew up fromOklahoma City.
Me and him stayed tight.
We still are very tight to thisday.
He's my brother.
He flew up and we...
We're driving down together,and we just decided that we were
(34:16):
going to let God lead us thiswhole entire trip.
So we didn't plan our routewhatsoever.
We just got really quiet andasked the Lord where to go and
what to do.
And he led us to some reallyamazing places throughout the
country.
It was incredible.
(34:37):
One of the places he told us togo...
was um called blue riverkentucky which i was like okay
god if this is real i'll find iton the maps uh and it was so we
get all the way out there andwe're in the middle of
appalachia driving around kindof looking around like okay god
(34:57):
did you really tell us to comehere um and i'm just looking for
something and then i look on myright and i see a civil war
battlefield and he had beenshowing us uh civil war
battlefields all up and down theshenandoah valley I kind of
feel like what he was showing uswas maybe just the status of
(35:19):
the body of Christ.
I think in the time leading upto now, and still really right
now that the body's kind of at acivil war, to be honest,
there's all these denominationsfighting about who's right when
that's really not the point.
The point is that Jesus Christcame and died for us.
And, um, we're to follow himand not any denomination.
(35:41):
Um, but so we pull into thisplace and, I look to my right
and there's a 15 foot tallstatue of Abraham Lincoln.
And I'm like, Oh my gosh.
Okay.
In the middle of nowhere.
Yeah.
So, um, what he was speaking tome about that was the story of
(36:01):
Abraham when he leaves home andhe, he tells him to go where he
tells him to basically.
And he, just follows the Lord'svoice to the land of the
promise and the promised land,the land of milk and honey and
all that.
Yeah.
So it was just really coolconfirmation to see.
And, um, it was just an amazingtrip.
And now I'm here in Oklahomacity.
(36:23):
Uh, I met the love of my life.
She's her name is Annie.
Shout out Annie.
Speaker 00 (36:29):
Hey,
Speaker 02 (36:32):
um, just want to interrupt you really quick.
So, um, You talked about theparable of the lost sheep,
right?
That's what Rob read out loud.
And that concept of the lostsheep, I mean, it's everywhere
in the Bible.
It's not, sometimes we kind oflike parcel it out and we think,
oh, like that's just one storyin the gospels, but it's in like
Matthew 10, Matthew 15, Psalm119, Jeremiah 50, Luke 15,
(36:58):
Matthew 18, Zechariah 10,Ezekiel 34.
I And it basically, like inEzekiel, for example, Ezekiel
34, 12, it says, as a shepherdseeks out his flock when he is
among his sheep that have beenscattered, so I will seek out my
sheep and I will rescue them.
And like, this is back in theOld Testament, prophesying that
there's one that's going tocome, a shepherd that's going to
(37:20):
seek out the ones that are lostand he's going to save them and
find them wherever they're at,right?
And if you guys remember backin testimony podcast numero uno,
my testimony that I shared, Imean, that's my story too,
right?
I was encountered in thewilderness very much like Connor
was.
He had an experience where Godwas moving on him, spoke to him
(37:42):
through song, brought a dog tohis feet, showed him a picture
of his state and needing to comeand surrender, and then brought
a multitude around him andbasically grabbed a hold of him
and saved him.
And that's very much like whathappened to me.
I got grabbed a hold of andrescued.
But sometimes we have atendency to be like, oh yeah,
(38:04):
he's the good shepherd thatseeks out and finds the lost
sheep and grabs the sheep andsaves them.
And then they put a period atthe end of that sentence.
But it's actually the sheep isrestored to the fold so that
then they can listen to theshepherd's voice and be led.
And I love how you launchedright into a week later, you're
being led by the Spirit.
You're being led by the voiceof God.
Because you said yes insurrender, you recognized him as
(38:25):
the shepherd who saves us.
And at that point in time, yousaid, yes, you're the shepherd
that I follow now.
And there's a lot of people outthere that are content to be
saved.
They're content to be rescued.
And then they go, oh, thanks somuch.
I got my ticket.
And now I'm just going to livehowever I want.
I'm going to be kind of justwaiting it out till either Jesus
(38:47):
comes back or I die.
And they don't really realizethat the shepherd is constantly
talking to us and wanting us tocome because he's got a plan for
us, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (38:58):
So one of the biggest scriptures that I always
lean on is Jeremiah 29, 11.
You know, for the Lord knowsthe plans he has for you, plans
to prosper, plans not to harmyou, plans for your welfare.
I don't know if I got that deadon or not.
Give you hope in the future.
Hope in the future.
And like, that's very much thestory that he wants to write for
(39:22):
everybody.
Yeah.
And, and, The story, too, to meof the Bible is just a grand
adventure of following the Lordand doing His will.
It always sticks out to me whenI see people that have faith
(39:45):
and love Jesus, but they're notreally doing much.
They're kind of just sittingaround, and that's totally
not...
what the Lord has for us.
My walk with God has been aconstant adventure.
You know, it's been fun.
It's been the most fun I'veever had in my life.
(40:07):
I actually, I said this tosomeone not too long ago, but my
life really didn't start untilthe day I said yes to God.
Speaker 02 (40:16):
Amen.
Yep, 100%.
Speaker 01 (40:18):
That's exactly what happened to me too.
And it just felt like all thoseyears I wasted...
were just burned away, really.
All the guilt I had, all theshame, all that just burned
away.
And there was just one thing onmy mind was how do I seek the
(40:39):
Lord?
And how do I continue to moveforward in what He has for me?
And I just want to encourageanyone that's stuck right now in
the mundaneness of life to...
to ask God, what is the biggerpicture you have for me?
Because I can promise you it'snot sitting in a church pew
(41:03):
saying your Hail Marys and goinghome and turning on the TV.
He has so much more for all ofus.
And it's really, me and Brianwere talking about this earlier
this week, maybe last week, butit's a radical obedience that
(41:24):
God's calling out of us.
He can do so much with yes, buthe can't do really anything
with a no.
He needs your willingness.
He needs your heart.
He needs total surrender onyour end.
And it's not the easiest thingin the world to walk out.
(41:48):
It's really not.
It's actually very hard.
But the Bible tells us that theway to heaven is a thin, narrow
gate.
It's not easy to get through.
And that's for a reason,because God wants us sold out
for Him.
He wants our hearts sold out toHim and Him only.
Speaker 02 (42:09):
Yeah, as you're talking, it's kind of reminding
me of when I first...
gave my life over to Christ, Iwas, um, I was hit with the
reality of the gospel and thereality of what he's, what he's
made available and the salvationand the freedom that he offers.
And I was like, so overwhelmedwith the truth of who God was
like, like the first week, um,after I got saved and baptized,
(42:32):
I like, I started telling thegospel to everyone who would
listen.
I talked to pretty mucheveryone that worked with me.
And there was one guy that Iwas a little bit nervous to
share with.
And, uh, I actually had a dreamthe night before that I was
sharing the gospel with him, andthen he pulled out a gun and
killed me.
And I remember talking withAmy, and I was just so nervous
(42:53):
about going to work that daybecause we woke up in the middle
of the night, and I'm like, Ifeel like I could die tomorrow.
I feel like God maybe warned methat I was going to get shot or
something.
And I remember deciding in thatmoment that I was going to die
to myself, and I was going todie...
to the worry about death.
And so I wrote a note on mykitchen counter and I left it
(43:15):
and I said, I knew what wasgoing to happen to me today and
I chose to go to work anyway.
And I left it on my kitchencounter and we drove to work and
we were running a little bitlate and my wife and I were
driving down the interstate andthere was a vehicle that was
parked out in a parking lot.
It was outside of a brewery andthere was a guy who was kind of
(43:36):
out and he was leaning overlooking at the ground and And he
looked like he was thrown up.
And I was like, well, it's alittle early for like some guy
to be thrown up outside abrewery.
That's a little weird.
And so I just had this littleinclination in my head, like, I
wonder if I should stop and gotalk to him.
And the moment that I had thatthought, our car radio, as we're
driving in a crescendo ofvoices all came together and it
(43:59):
went, ah, stop like queen, youknow, like all that crazy
voices.
And then the radio cut off andI it like startled me.
And I said, we need to turnaround.
We need to turn around.
The Lord is telling us to turnaround.
So, you know, keep in mind thatlike I had a dream.
I died.
I'm on my way to my deathsentence.
And then the Lord stops mehalfway.
(44:20):
And I tell Amy to do U-turn.
We pull into the parking lotand I get out.
And the guy is getting out ofthe side of his car as his wife
is trying to get into thedriver's seat.
And she's like, he doesn't wantto talk to anybody.
We're good.
He doesn't want to talk.
But as she's saying, he doesn'twant to talk.
He's getting out and walkingover to me.
And come to find out that hewas a Christian and he got a
(44:44):
phone call as he was drivingdown the road and took the call
that his brother died.
And his brother was a strongbeliever too.
And he pulled over on the sideof the road and he was crying
and weeping and screaming at thetop of his lungs.
God, I trusted you.
I believe that you are real,but why did you let my brother
die?
I don't believe.
(45:05):
I won't believe unless you sendsomebody right now to tell me.
And as he's screaming out ofthe top of his lungs, God told
me through a car radio to turnaround.
And I told him, I had aknowing, I said, your brother is
with Jesus right now.
And your cries were answered.
He sent me here right now totell you that he loves you, that
he's not done with you, thathe's going to plan a purpose for
(45:27):
you.
And the guy grabbed me in a bigbear hug and he started crying
on my shoulder.
And he told me, I'll rememberthis till the day I die.
And this was right before I wasabout to go and die, right?
So the Lord gave me that.
And I was driving to work therest of the way, just kind of
almost in silence and in awe.
And I said, if that's the way Igo out, then that's the only
(45:50):
way I want to live from now on.
Like that is the perfect way toend this whole life.
And so I remember...
I got in the room with the guyI was a little nervous to share
with that I had dreams about.
He wasn't a bad guy.
He just had a scary dream,right?
And so I share the gospel withhim, and I tell him about my
testimony, but I use the parableof the lost sheep and the good
(46:12):
shepherd.
And I get down to that part inthe dream where he kills me.
And now I'm stringing the storyout a little bit longer.
I'm trying to get a few morebreaths in.
Unknown (46:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (46:24):
And then I kind of like, okay, I don't, I don't
have anything else to say.
So I kind of just stopped and Ijust braced for it, man.
And I really truly believe thatI was going to die.
Um, and instead of pulling outa gun, he sits back and he goes,
you know what?
And he was an atheist and hegoes, I've never told anybody
this story, but like after youtold me that wild story, I feel
(46:44):
fine telling you.
Cause you know, it's not thatcrazy after hearing that.
And, uh, he goes, when I was 12years old, I was walking down
the street and And I was takenup out of my body and I was
hovering above like the earth.
And he said, this being cameover to me and said, ask me
anything.
And he said to the being,what's the meaning of life?
(47:05):
And the being said to be ashepherd.
Wow.
And he was instantly back inhis body and he goes, you know
what?
I've never looked intoChristianity and I've actually
never heard the story aboutJesus being a good shepherd.
But the moment that you told meabout that, it connected with
that moment that I had when Iwas 12 that I've never told
anybody about.
And he said, thank you, stoodup, walked out of my office.
(47:30):
And I didn't die, but that wasthe moment that I resigned my
job and I died to myself anddecided I was going to be spirit
led from then on and onlylisten to the Lord and where he
tells me to go.
But in that moment, I realizedthat when we're saved as a sheep
and we begin to follow theshepherd and we become many
shepherds for others.
And so we actually, in stepwith the shepherd, lose our
(47:53):
identity as a sheep and webecome walking with the shepherd
and so much like him that welead the others behind us in.
And that's what he's called youto.
And in a radical, quick way,over a short amount of time,
He's raised you up to be ashepherd of others.
And even this podcast is yourstart because there's people
that are listening right nowthat are in the same exact
(48:14):
place.
They're lost.
They're broken.
They're empty.
They need help.
They're like a busted andbruised dog.
They need the feet of JesusChrist.
And they need to hear atestimony of someone who's
walked it out and surrenderedand the power that exists on the
other side.
And so you carry that.
And I'm going to let you kindof share your final thoughts or
whatever.
And then I want you to pray.
(48:35):
I'm in that manner for thepeople listening that that might
be lost or maybe the peoplethat are stuck in religion,
stuck in, in the powerlessnessand they're kind of just a sheet
maybe stuck in the, in the, inthe pen.
Speaker 01 (48:47):
So to speak.
Amen.
Amen.
I guess what I want to leaveeveryone with is no matter what
you are telling yourself everyday, No matter how good your
(49:12):
life looks on the outside, Iwant you to take a deep look at
your heart.
I want you to ask yourself, amI really doing this?
Why am I doing this?
Why am I doing these things?
Am I doing it?
(49:33):
to fit in?
Am I doing it because I'mafraid of who people really
might think I am?
Am I doing it because I don'tknow any better?
But really take a look atyourself and ask yourself, is
this really what I want my lifeto look like?
(49:54):
Or is there something more outthere for me?
Because I can promise you, thatwhen I said yes to Jesus and I
put both of my feet in the waterand when I started floating
away, I was taken in immediatelyby the strongest current I've
(50:17):
ever felt in my life that haspushed me into some of the
greatest things I've everwitnessed in my life.
Some of the sweetest momentsI've ever had in my life The
biggest desires of my heart havebeen fulfilled.
And I know that there's so muchmore.
(50:39):
Literally anything is possiblewith our Lord Jesus Christ.
Put down all the fear you haveof losing what you perceive that
you have right now because Ipromise you, you have nothing if
you don't have Jesus in yourheart.
You are literally losingnothing but the world and the
world dies.
(51:00):
But God is eternal, and so isour salvation.
Father, we just lift up all ofthe lost people right now that
are listening to this podcast.
Father, we ask that you justcome down, God, and you just
(51:21):
bear your arm of witness tothem.
Lord, we just ask for yourfavor.
over those who are lost, God,that you wouldn't allow them to
continue to tumble, that youwould pick them up like you
picked me up, God.
God, we just humbly ask you,Lord, to just start revealing
(51:46):
yourself to people that needyour love.
God, if you have to drag someof these people out of the holes
they're in, Lord, I just praythat you drag them out God, I
just know how good you are.
I've seen your goodness in myown life.
(52:07):
God, I just pray for yourgoodness over everybody right
now that's listening to thispodcast that needs it.
You are so good, Lord.
You are so, so good.
And you pulled me out of theriptide right when I needed you
(52:27):
to.
And Lord, I just...
i just see someone right now inthe riptide they're flailing
their arms and they're scaredand they don't know what to do
and they're just begging forhelp lord and i just see you
putting your hand down andpulling them out i just pray
(52:53):
whoever that is that the lordpulls you out of that and he
just brings you ashore He givesyou a crown and a robe and a
ring on your finger.
In the mighty name of Jesus, Ipray.
Amen.
Speaker 02 (53:12):
I hear right now there's someone out there named
Kathy.
Kathy, you've been dealing withdepression.
The Lord is setting you freeright now, right where you are.
At his feet, the Son is settingyou free.
Who the Son sets free is freeindeed.
(53:34):
Let all of that wash off ofyou.
There's freedom in the mightyname of Jesus.
I hear Caleb.
Caleb, you've been dealing withsevere illness.
It's in your lungs.
Receive the healing touch ofGod right now over your lungs.
(54:01):
I believe by faith you're beingset free right now.
Anyone dealing with the spiritof suicide, thinking of taking
their own life, that power isbroken.
In the mighty name of Jesus,you don't struggle with it
(54:23):
anymore.
And right now we just thank theLord For this podcast, for
Connor's testimony, for Anniejoining us, Lord, we just thank
you so much for this powerfultestimony to set people free.
We bless each and every one ofyou as you listen.
(54:45):
Yeah, we're just so excited tobe able to record that and push
it out.
Feel free to go on to thetestimonypodcast.com and share
your testimony of how thisimpacted you, if this ministered
to you.
There's a form you can fill outon there.
We've received amazingtestimonies from people being
set free, pulling over on theside of the road and actually
feeling tangibly the power ofGod coming upon them and setting
them free.
(55:05):
I encourage you to submit thosetestimonies, submit those words
of encouragement for Connor,for Annie, if this ministered to
you in any way.
Join us for the next testimonypodcast.
Thanks, Connor and Annie, forjoining us.
Speaker 01 (55:19):
Thanks for having us on.
Welcome to the Testimony Podcast.
My name is Bryan.
What a fantastic episode wehave today.
We have got my friend Connorand his wife Annie.
(00:26):
You want to say hello?
Hey, what's going on?
We are talking about theprodigals today.
The sheep that are lost, thatare wandering, that are alone,
that need to hear the voice ofthe shepherd.
And in fact, that's today'sepisode title.
And it is the voice of theshepherd, a prodigal story.
And I have got a fantasticstory on the hook today for
(00:47):
everyone to listen to out there.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
And we're really excited to bebroadcasting Hey, what's going
on
Speaker 01 (01:03):
everybody?
My name is Connor Rynning.
I'm originally from Worcester,Massachusetts, and I'm now
living in Oklahoma City with mywonderful wife, Annie, who's
sitting to the left of me.
I met Bryan, I want to say liketwo months ago.
at a thing called the jesusgathering my father-in-law met
(01:26):
him and was like man this guy'sgot something on him he's like
you got to go talk to him allright let's see what happens and
uh well here i am sitting todayin this room with him recording
this and uh we've beenfellowshipping a lot i'm just
really excited about all thethings that are going on in our
community
Speaker 02 (01:41):
Yeah, God is so good.
We're really experiencing a lotof personal revival, community
revival, some amazing times offellowship together here in
Oklahoma City.
Just a lot of things happeningin the body of Christ right now,
some unification that'shappening.
I know my last podcast wastalking about unity in the body
of Christ.
We're actually seeing it startto happen all around us.
We're seeing these amazing homegroups gathered together.
(02:03):
They're sort of interweavingand kind of intermingling, and
the body of Christ is reallystarting to flow and function.
And I pray that that is aacross the country, across the
world, wherever this is beinglistened to.
And I'm just really, reallyblessed by what I'm seeing
happen in the body of Christ.
One of the reasons that I'vetaken some time off from the
testimony podcast, in caseyou're wondering, for all of my
(02:24):
faithful listeners out there, isI actually started a YouTube
channel with my wife and myfamily.
And so I'm going to give aquick shout out to the YouTube
channel.
It is called Simplicity in theJourney.
So go ahead and look forSimplicity in the Journey on
YouTube.
Connect with me there.
Check out my videos.
Go ahead and like, subscribeand share and comment on those
(02:45):
videos as well.
If you've been a longtimetestimony podcast listener, but
this is the first time thatyou're reaching out, go ahead
and subscribe to the channelbecause we're going to have some
great content coming up.
We're going to be right back,nose to the grindstone with the
testimony podcast.
It's still a passion of mine,but I wait until the perfect
testimony to record.
And when I hear it, I have toget it recorded.
And so I have brought Connorhere to talk about his story.
(03:07):
And I know that he wants toopen up with a scripture first.
So I'm going to let him getthat I just wanted to open up
with
Speaker 01 (03:30):
Matthew 18, 12.
What do you think if a man hasa hundred sheep and one of them
has gone astray, does he notleave the 99 on the mountains
and go in search of the one thatwent astray?
So that scripture to me isreally, it's my story and it's a
lot of people's stories in thebody of Christ.
And so when I was younger, myfather had gotten saved when I
(03:54):
was maybe 12 years old.
There was a lot of turmoil inmy family before then, a lot of
fighting, a lot of things thathappened.
just really weren't great towitness as a young man.
It kind of shapes how you thinkabout your father.
It shapes how you see yourfather.
My father had made the choiceto follow Christ.
(04:16):
And just one day, you know, hecame home and he was like, yeah,
I follow Jesus now.
And I'm a different man.
And to me, it felt reallysuperficial in the moment.
And I was like, I don't reallybelieve this.
Uh, why, why now are you justbetter than everyone else?
(04:36):
You know, that was kind of howI was thinking.
So, um, he would always bringme to Bible studies and, um,
there was everyone there, youknow, speaking in tongues and
all this other stuff.
And I'm like, I have no ideawhat's going on, but I just
don't buy it.
Um, and when I was maybe 13, I,I gave my life to the Lord, but
(04:58):
in that moment, it really meantnothing to me.
Um, I was just doing it reallyto please my dad.
And as time went on, myfather's faith really grew
stronger and stronger and I justdrifted further and further and
further away from all of it.
I was always really prideful ineverything that I did.
(05:22):
I always couldn't really bewrong when it came to certain
things.
I just believed what I did andI was gonna do whatever I wanted
to do whenever I wanted to doit and I really felt no
convictions over anything thatwas going on in my life um so it
had been probably you know 15years of me doing that um and I
(05:47):
was this was 2023 um I had justlost a lot of weight and um I
was kind of feeling myself andum I was just really off doing a
lot of stupid things and justdoing really a lot of like
(06:10):
cocaine.
I was drinking a lot.
I just never really couldfigure out why nothing would go
my way.
Just putting all of my faithreally in myself and just
getting so frustrated when Icouldn't figure out why my life
(06:30):
was the way it was.
So, um, things took a prettydrastic turn when I had met this
girl and I was definitely indeep lust in this situation.
And, um, I had gotten herpregnant, she got an abortion
and that just totally, uh,rocked my world.
(06:53):
Um, I just felt horrible aboutthe whole thing.
And, um, I kept me up at night,um, I was just depressed.
I was drinking to the pointwhere I would get in my truck
and I would think in my head,man, I really wouldn't mind if I
just crashed right now anddied.
(07:14):
Just nothing could reallyconsole my soul.
It was just like deep tormentin my heart all the time.
And I just remember it was justeating me up and eating me up
and eating me up.
And one day I just called mydad, and I just confessed it to
(07:37):
him.
And I was so nervous.
I was like, man, he's going torip me a new one.
But I got the complete oppositereaction, actually.
He just told me, son, I loveyou, and everything's going to
be okay.
And that was probably...
I didn't know it at the time,but that was the first time I
(07:59):
really felt the love of thefather through, um, through my
dad.
Like I felt like God's love forme through my father speaking
that.
And, um, I just remember likeit silenced the storm almost
immediately.
Um, so after all that hadhappened, um, I was still
(08:20):
drinking heavily and I was also,um, doing a lot of like
mushrooms and stuff like that totry to get spiritual, I guess
you could call it.
I don't know if that's reallywhat I was.
I mean, that's for sure what Iwas looking for, but I was
looking for it still in thewrong place.
Um, and at the time I was, um,I was a chef for my dad's
(08:41):
business and every year, um, theJesus gathering would come to
Boston and they would put on a,um, a tent revival.
And my dad, um, had met he'snow actually my father-in-law
crazy um but my dad was friendswith um the guy who puts it on
(09:02):
his name is john rutkay um andmy uncle ken was also friends
with him and this other guy mattwhalen um and so they started
coming to boston and i would goevery year and i would cook for
it that would be like the goodthing i did for the year you
know uh
Speaker 02 (09:19):
your penance yeah for your life of sin
Speaker 01 (09:21):
yeah
Speaker 02 (09:22):
You know, and before you continue on really quick,
as you were talking and you weretalking about your father and
like how receiving your father'slove in that moment, like God
loving you through your father,like gave you some peace in that
initial moment.
And you kind of hadn'tprocessed that you're
experiencing God reaching outthrough your father.
You know, I was reminded of thescripture in 1 Peter 4, 8, and
(09:47):
it says, love covers a multitudeof sins.
And like, here you are lost inall of your sin and all of your
shame and all of yourhelplessness and God's love
reaching through.
Like you felt, you felt acovering of your sin
momentarily, you know, becausewe, you know, in order for our
sins to be covered completely,we have to, you know, obviously
(10:08):
accept Jesus Christ and be setfree, but you're, you're feeling
comforted because your, yoursins felt covered in that moment
by God's love.
And you felt that.
And like, I just wanted to,encourage anyone out there
listening, if you're connectingwith Connor's story because
you're lost in that sin, Godloves you.
He's not mad at you.
(10:29):
He wants to cover you with Hislove right now.
And I just believe by theSpirit that you're feeling a
tangible comfort come upon you,like, you're feeling the comfort
that Connor felt from hisfather.
Cause you're, you're hearingthe love of, of the father
through this podcast right now.
So anyways, I had to interruptyou there.
Sorry to interrupt your story,but no, I mean, that was,
Speaker 01 (10:51):
that's totally my prayer for this whole entire
thing is that people realize.
So what, what I really realizedthrough all this, I'll get to
the whole part of it, but I justwant to sum it up right now
quickly, um, was, um, there wasnothing that i could have ever
(11:12):
done to fix my problems and um ibasically just toiled and
toiled and toiled and spiraledand just kept spiraling until i
was radically saved by god andit it just really takes one one
(11:35):
touch really from the father Ibelieve to open your heart to
the reality of Jesus came anddied for our sins.
And it's not just for oneperson.
He didn't do it just for me.
He's doing it for anyone who'shearing this that needs to hear
(11:55):
that.
That he died for you as well.
That you don't need to put on aworldly act for the people
around you for them to love you.
Cause that's something I reallystruggled with was if, uh, you
know, I always had in the backof my head, I always kind of
knew God was real, but I never,uh, had the, um, I was just
(12:18):
afraid.
I was afraid of man.
I was afraid, uh, I'd lose allmy friends.
I was afraid people would thinkI was weird.
Um, and I was just totallydeceived by the devil through
all that.
Um, so back to the story, um,so i'm cooking once a year at
this thing and uh now my he'snow my father-in-law but he's in
(12:41):
the back and i'm in the kitchenand he's throwing body blows at
me you know just prophesying tome um just telling me over and
over you know what are you doingwhy aren't you following jesus
why are you wasting your timehe's like there's uh just you're
just wasting your time and um inever really listened to him i
(13:03):
would just be like yeah allright buddy You know, why don't
you go tell someone else whocares?
And, um, it took, so it was thethird year and I had met this
guy.
He lives in Oklahoma now.
Um, and he didn't even talk tome about Jesus.
He just had a bro conversationwith me.
(13:25):
He was just talking to me aboutbow hunting, um, and just
outdoor stuff like that.
And at the time, um, I wastotally obsessed with
Yellowstone, and I wanted to bea cowboy.
Speaker 02 (13:39):
Don't we all?
I used to love spaghettiwesterns back in the day, like
Clint Eastwood movies.
That was me.
Speaker 01 (13:47):
So I was super into that, and he's just like, yeah,
man, why don't you come outhere, and you should bow hunt
with me.
We can go do all this coolstuff.
And I was like, yeah, yeah,yeah, sounds good.
I got to go, though, becauseI'm actually about to go to a
party.
I'm going to go drink.
My sister had met his wife.
I think two years prior to usmeeting in San Diego at a Jesus
(14:08):
gathering.
And his wife reached out to mysister or my sister reached out
to his wife.
I can't remember which one itwas credit to whoever it was.
She sent my sister, his numberand my sister sent it to me and
said, Hey Connor, I feel likeyou need to reach out to him.
Just talk to him about bowhunting or whatever.
(14:30):
So I was like, okay, yeah,sure.
I'll do that.
Just some random guy.
He was very random, yes.
I had met him for five minutes.
And I don't know.
It's just something about him.
I trusted him.
Speaker 02 (14:43):
So just reach out to this random guy that lives in a
different state.
Yes.
See if you can fly out and meetup with him.
Speaker 01 (14:48):
Yes.
Okay.
Just trying to follow you.
Yes, that is what happened.
So, yeah.
So I get this random guy'sphone number from Oklahoma.
And I'm living in Massachusettsat the time.
And I text him.
I'm like, hey, Rob, it's Connorfrom Boston.
Would you still want to bowhunt with me?
(15:10):
And I didn't have a bow.
I had never bow hunted before.
He didn't bow hunt either.
I learned this later.
But he's like, yeah, man.
He's like, get a plane ticket.
Come on out.
And I was like, okay.
You know what?
This feels really crazy.
(15:30):
But for some reason, it feelsreally right.
So I just bought a plane ticketand the next day I saw my dad
at work and I was like, Hey dad,I was like, man, you should
come bow hunt with me.
Like that'd be so cool.
Father, son going bow hunting.
Like not a lot of people can dothat.
Yeah.
My dad's like, no, I'm notgoing to do that.
(15:50):
He doesn't hunt either.
He doesn't own a bow.
And the next day he comes intowork and he goes, you know what,
Connor, I'm going to come withyou.
dude, that's so cool.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
What a good dad.
Yeah.
So shout out dad, if you'relistening.
Yeah.
Shout out Bob.
Um, and I was so stoked.
And I remember my boss who, um,he looked at me and he goes,
(16:11):
Connor, you know, a lot ofpeople would kill for a father
like that.
And I was like, wow, you know,it really put it into
perspective for me.
Um, and, um, so we got theseplans to go.
My dad told me, um, after all,everything went down, but he
wasn't going to go.
(16:31):
But that night the Lord hadspoken to him and said, you need
to be in Oklahoma cause this iswhere your son's going to
surrender to me.
Wow.
So my father, um, in totalfaith and what he had heard, uh,
the Lord say just bought a bowand a plane ticket and he's
trusting me to meet this randomguy in Oklahoma.
(16:51):
So that's where the adventurestarts.
Um, There's like a couple ofweeks before and I'm still doing
the same old things.
I'm drinking.
It was strange.
I was smoking a lot of pot, butI had felt conviction over it
and I wasn't sure what it was.
I would just feel really guiltyabout it.
(17:13):
And I was like, man, I justdon't like this anymore.
But
Speaker 02 (17:17):
it's like you started feeling God's
conviction, you know, thedrawing of the Lord, the, kind
of realization of your sin, theemptiness that you were feeling.
And it was like a drawing thatwas happening.
It's really interesting becauseyou're talking about going bow
hunting and like, you know, yourdad having to buy a bow.
And I was reminded of Psalm 38.
It says, Oh Lord, rebuke me notin your anger, nor discipline
(17:39):
me in your wrath for your arrowshave sunk into me and your hand
has come down on me.
There is no soundness in myflesh because of your
indignation.
There's no health in my bonesbecause of my sin for my
iniquities have gone over myhead like a heavy burden.
They're too heavy for me.
And it's like, that's like whatyou were experiencing.
(17:59):
Yeah.
It's really good.
Speaker 01 (18:01):
Yeah.
It was a hundred percent thatwe're leaving to go.
And this was kind of my lasthurrah.
I remember I had eaten a potgummy on the plane.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, naturally.
I had to do one more bad thing.
And I'm sitting next to my dad,and I'm like, man, why am I
(18:23):
doing this?
I felt pretty guilty about it,but it was what it was.
We get to Oklahoma, probably 3in the morning, and it's pitch
black out.
I can't really see anything.
I see a bunch of cowboystatues, and I'm like, all
right, where am I at?
Yeah, I must be in Oklahoma.
Unknown (18:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (18:41):
So we get to our hotel.
It's probably 2 in the morning,and we're supposed to meet up
with this guy I've known forfive minutes.
Were you like, why are therecars?
I thought they were all horses.
Yeah, I was very confused bythat.
This is not at all what Iexpected.
Yeah, I was like, I want mymoney back.
So...
(19:05):
I'm supposed to meet up withthis guy.
I'm kind of nervous.
I'm like the random strangerthat you flew out to meet.
I'm like, okay.
Um, you know, please don't letme get murdered.
Um, traffic.
I got to Oregon stolen.
I got two guys with me, so itcan't be that bad.
You know, if he tries to getus, we'll get them, you know?
Yeah.
That's my thought.
Um, so we wake up at likeprobably four in the morning, so
(19:28):
two hours of sleep and we go tomeet him at a Walmart parking
lot.
Speaker 02 (19:33):
Okay.
Unknown (19:34):
Um,
Speaker 01 (19:34):
And it was probably zero degrees, if not colder,
outside.
And I'm just really wondering,what am I doing here?
Like, really, what am I doinghere?
Am I here to bow hunt, or whyam I here?
This question was really risingin me.
(19:54):
And he was about two hours lateto meeting up with us.
Shout out, Rob.
Oh, nice.
Way to be two hours late, Rob.
Yeah.
Shout out.
He's working on it.
We love him.
Yeah.
Sure do.
And I know where you, I knowwhere you live now.
So it makes me a little moremad that you were two hours
(20:15):
late, but it's besides thepoint.
Cause you said what?
He's like five minutes awayfrom where you're supposed to
be.
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (20:21):
Five, five minutes.
Speaker 01 (20:22):
Yeah.
So, so we meet up, he takes usout to this land and I'm like
just enthralled with the place.
I'm like, man, this isbeautiful.
Super stoked.
It stunk because it was supercold.
We sat out there for a littlewhile.
Nothing really happened.
(20:43):
And then the next day, that'sreally when the fireworks
started going off.
So we get up super early again.
Rob was going to be late.
So he just told us to meet himout there.
So we're out there and I'msitting in this blind by myself.
In the middle of nowhere,Oklahoma.
(21:06):
And that question came back up.
It's like, you know, why am Ihere?
What am I doing here?
And I just remember in thatmoment, all the birds started
chirping.
Everything was just loud in myears, vibrant, beautiful noise.
And like this piece just likefell over my whole entire body
(21:30):
and my being.
And I was like, whoa.
It's like, what is this?
Like, this is, I've never feltlike this much peace before in
my life.
And then Rob showed up and abunch of deer to start flying
around the place and my heart'spumping.
And I really only knew like oneworship song by heart.
(21:56):
And, you know, it's starting todawn on me that God had
something to do with me beingthere.
you know?
Speaker 02 (22:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (22:03):
So I start singing this song and it's, our God is
an awesome God.
And I'm just singing that in myhead for, I'm not joking,
probably two hours straight, um,just over and over and over and
over.
And finally, um, I see threedeer up on this hill and, um,
(22:23):
like the first thing that poppedin my head, you know, not
really being a believer oranything like that, but I was
just like, oh, the Father, Son,and the Holy Spirit.
The trinity of deer appeared.
So I'm watching them come in,and they get close enough where
I draw my bow back, and I'm justsitting there, and my heart is
(22:44):
pounding through my chest.
And they weren't like big deer,but you know if you know, when
you see a deer for the firsttime in your hunting, it's like,
whoa.
It blows your mind how excitedyou can get.
Um, so they got close enoughand I shot and I missed, it went
right under its belly.
And, uh, I ran out to go checkmy arrows.
(23:05):
See, Hey, maybe I did hit it.
Maybe there's blood.
Um, I didn't hit it.
And I guess I've never huntedbefore.
So I didn't know what to do.
You're not supposed to do that.
So if you miss, don't go chaseafter your arrow.
Um, learn from his mistake.
So they all left and I'm kindof disappointed.
I'm like, I don't know when I'mgoing to get this opportunity
(23:26):
again.
But I remember my dad beinglike, it's okay.
I think there's something elsein store for today.
And I was like, all right,whatever.
So a little preface to what I'mabout to say.
The week before we went outthere, I was talking to my
sisters, and I was like, man, Ijust wish a dog would show up
(23:47):
and I could just take it.
And this will make sense.
Yeah.
And my sister's like, yeah,that'd be pretty cool.
I just want
Speaker 02 (23:56):
to steal a dog.
Speaker 01 (23:58):
I didn't steal.
So we come out of the woods.
It's like negative 10.
It got colder.
Kept getting colder, of course.
And I opened the door to get inthe truck to leave.
And I looked down and there'sjust this little dog laying at
my feet.
And I was like, what?
(24:19):
I'm like, this guy needs help.
So I picked him up.
I put him in the truck.
I went and got him like a bunchof donuts or something.
I brought him to the shelter,but I knew that dog was mine.
But looking back on that momentnow, what I see is God was
painting a picture of me comingto his feet and surrendering
(24:46):
just like the dog did.
He was sick.
He was hurting.
He was lost.
And he just needed someone tolove him.
And, um, that was just, it'sjust a powerful picture that God
painted with that dog.
Um, so we had to bring him tothe shelter and I went onto the
(25:06):
shelter and I was like, Hey,listen, like, uh, whatever you
do, do not kill this dog.
Like I promise you, I will beback and I will get this dog.
And they were like, yeah, yeah,get out of here.
They actually startedthreatening me.
with legal stuff saying I waslying about where I got the dog
and all this weird stuff.
But that's besides the point.
(25:27):
But he did not steal the dog,people.
Speaker 02 (25:29):
I didn't steal the dog.
The dog showed up and itcollapsed at his feet like we
need to collapse at the feet ofJesus.
Yes.
Speaker 01 (25:37):
So weird enough, her dad had heard that me and my
dad and my uncle were going tobe in town And they were
scouting a location for theJesus gathering.
So it all worked out that like10 of the best evangelists I
(25:58):
know were in town when I wasthere.
What a coincidence.
And they were happening to havea worship and prayer night.
Wow.
So my dad's like, hey, theyinvited us to come over.
And I'm like, well, I'm here,right?
Can't go anywhere.
(26:18):
Might as well
Speaker 02 (26:20):
go.
Um, and let me just hear fromAnnie really quick.
So like when this is all goingon, like what do you know of
Connor and what, what is yourkind of experience at this
point?
Speaker 00 (26:31):
Um, we were just friends at that point.
So he, um, a little backstory.
We met that Jesus gathering inBoston, um, couple of months
prior to him coming to
Speaker 02 (26:46):
Oklahoma.
Okay.
The one where he, he texted.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
That random guy, Rob was there.
Okay.
Speaker 00 (26:52):
Yeah.
So I met him there and, um, Iknew of him before I met him
because I was really goodfriends with his two sisters and
I was, I loved his parents.
I just had never met him.
Um,
Speaker 02 (27:08):
had you heard stories about him?
Speaker 00 (27:10):
I heard that his dad approached my dad and was like,
uh, Hey, yeah.
So Annie and Connor's probablyme.
Speaker 02 (27:18):
Really?
Okay.
All right.
Speaker 00 (27:21):
Yeah.
And my dad's response at thetime was absolutely not.
Speaker 02 (27:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 00 (27:30):
So I was there in Boston and I remember my, I
remember seeing Connor.
I'm like, Oh, that's Connor.
Okay.
Well, interesting.
Unknown (27:38):
Um,
Speaker 00 (27:39):
And my dad was like, Annie, go introduce yourself.
Like he's just get back there.
And I just was so nervous.
I'm like,
Speaker 01 (27:46):
Oh, very nervous.
Speaker 00 (27:48):
I don't remember what I said, but we maybe talked
for 20 seconds and I just wordvomited the whole time.
Speaker 01 (27:54):
Yeah.
She scared me.
That's so funny.
I can, I can recount what shesaid.
She looked me in the eyes andgoes, would you ever move to
Oklahoma city?
And I was like,
Speaker 00 (28:04):
Okay.
It's making it sound way morecreepy.
Why would
Speaker 01 (28:07):
you say that?
It's like, what?
And I think I said, no.
Speaker 02 (28:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (28:14):
You said we're moving a
Speaker 02 (28:14):
little fast.
I just
Speaker 01 (28:15):
met
Speaker 00 (28:18):
you.
Speaker 01 (28:19):
No, it was a little prophetic there.
Yeah.
Cool.
Speaker 00 (28:22):
Well, so yeah, he, we ended up following each other
on social media and he hadmessaged me and was like, Hey,
yeah, I'm going to come outthere to Oklahoma to go bow
hunting.
I was like, what the heck?
That's so random.
Um, okay.
Who are you coming with?
And he was like my dad and myuncle Ken.
And so I called up my dad.
(28:43):
I'm like, Hey, like they'recoming out here.
Like, why don't you plan a tripout here?
And that led to my dad callinga whole lot of other people, the
troops and
Speaker 02 (28:54):
the divine setup was on.
Speaker 00 (28:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (28:57):
Okay.
So fast forward.
So you're, you're In the room,you show up with all the
evangelists and the worshipnight and it's all kicking off.
What's happening in your brain?
Speaker 01 (29:06):
So I am thinking, whoa, this is really weird.
To be honest, that was mythought.
I was like, whoa, this isweird, but it's not weird.
It was probably just the evilthings inside of me trying to
make me.
And I started settling in andthe worship music starts getting
(29:29):
more intense and more intense.
And I start kind of singingalong and getting into it.
And then this girl just burstsout at the top of her lungs,
just belting, our God is anawesome God.
And I mean, I guess the songjust got like remixed by Phil
(29:53):
Wickham, but at that point intime, nobody was singing this
song.
Yeah.
So I was, my mind was blown bythat.
And, um, it was cool before itwas cool.
Yeah.
And it just showed, I was like,Whoa, my God knows exactly what
I'm thinking.
You know, like he's making itknown to me that he knows what
I'm thinking.
(30:13):
Yeah.
This random stranger.
Speaker 02 (30:14):
Yeah.
That song was for you
Speaker 01 (30:16):
and it came out of her, her heart.
Yeah.
Um, so in that moment I knewthat Jesus was real, that he
loved me.
I got down on my knees and Igave my life to the Lord right
then and there.
I got baptized in the HolySpirit.
They immediately brought me toMarco.
(30:39):
Marco is my brother-in-law.
They brought me to his houseand they baptized me in his hot
tub.
Nice.
So I could not get away.
Speaker 00 (30:48):
Keep it in the family.
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (30:51):
Go
Speaker 01 (30:52):
to Marco's hot tub.
Speaker 00 (30:54):
Quick.
Speaker 01 (30:56):
That's not something you hear every day.
Yeah.
And Rob capped it all off.
He read the parable of the lostsheep to me.
And it just hit me so hard thatI was truly so lost.
And I tried everything, everyway.
(31:19):
to try and console myself, makemy life work the way I wanted
it to.
I tried everything but followJesus.
And as soon as I said yes toJesus, he started just pouring
out into my life, justabsolutely pouring out into my
(31:40):
life and just redeemedeverything that I had lost.
He redeemed everything so muchtime that was stolen by the
enemy um and he's just been sofaithful through the whole
entire thing so as soon as i gotsaved the lord spoke to me
(32:07):
quite frankly and told me tomove to oklahoma city wow um and
i was like okay through annieNo, I'm just kidding.
I had nothing to do with that.
So I'm like, okay, Lord, ifthis is you, I need witness.
(32:27):
So I went to my parents' housechurch.
I mean, as soon as I got home,I was going to church Wednesday
and twice on Sundays.
I was just going crazy for theLord.
And I went to this house churchand I think six people, had a
word for me that they saw meriding horses in the Midwest and
(32:51):
doing the Lord's work in theMidwest somewhere.
So that's amazing.
I said, okay, I'm like a weekinto this, but sure, let's do
it.
So I told everyone I knew I'mmoving to Oklahoma city.
They're like, what's your plan?
(33:11):
I was like, I don't have one.
My plan is whatever God wantsfor me.
Um, and I just never strayedfrom that.
Um, I just kept seeking him andseeking him.
Um, I never even made a plan.
I just remember it was abouttwo weeks before I was supposed
(33:32):
to leave and I had nowhere tolive.
And, um, I was just praying andpraying and praying and I'm
like, God, I know you want me todo this.
I just need you to show mewhere to go.
Um, And then my wife, she's nowmy wife, but she wasn't then,
texted me and she said, Connor,why don't you live at Marco's
house?
And I was like, he's got a hottub.
(33:53):
I was like, that's not bad.
I was like, are you sure?
And then he invited me to liveat his house.
Wow.
So Rob actually flew up fromOklahoma City.
Me and him stayed tight.
We still are very tight to thisday.
He's my brother.
He flew up and we...
We're driving down together,and we just decided that we were
(34:16):
going to let God lead us thiswhole entire trip.
So we didn't plan our routewhatsoever.
We just got really quiet andasked the Lord where to go and
what to do.
And he led us to some reallyamazing places throughout the
country.
It was incredible.
(34:37):
One of the places he told us togo...
was um called blue riverkentucky which i was like okay
god if this is real i'll find iton the maps uh and it was so we
get all the way out there andwe're in the middle of
appalachia driving around kindof looking around like okay god
(34:57):
did you really tell us to comehere um and i'm just looking for
something and then i look on myright and i see a civil war
battlefield and he had beenshowing us uh civil war
battlefields all up and down theshenandoah valley I kind of
feel like what he was showing uswas maybe just the status of
(35:19):
the body of Christ.
I think in the time leading upto now, and still really right
now that the body's kind of at acivil war, to be honest,
there's all these denominationsfighting about who's right when
that's really not the point.
The point is that Jesus Christcame and died for us.
And, um, we're to follow himand not any denomination.
(35:41):
Um, but so we pull into thisplace and, I look to my right
and there's a 15 foot tallstatue of Abraham Lincoln.
And I'm like, Oh my gosh.
Okay.
In the middle of nowhere.
Yeah.
So, um, what he was speaking tome about that was the story of
(36:01):
Abraham when he leaves home andhe, he tells him to go where he
tells him to basically.
And he, just follows the Lord'svoice to the land of the
promise and the promised land,the land of milk and honey and
all that.
Yeah.
So it was just really coolconfirmation to see.
And, um, it was just an amazingtrip.
And now I'm here in Oklahomacity.
(36:23):
Uh, I met the love of my life.
She's her name is Annie.
Shout out Annie.
Speaker 00 (36:29):
Hey,
Speaker 02 (36:32):
um, just want to interrupt you really quick.
So, um, You talked about theparable of the lost sheep,
right?
That's what Rob read out loud.
And that concept of the lostsheep, I mean, it's everywhere
in the Bible.
It's not, sometimes we kind oflike parcel it out and we think,
oh, like that's just one storyin the gospels, but it's in like
Matthew 10, Matthew 15, Psalm119, Jeremiah 50, Luke 15,
(36:58):
Matthew 18, Zechariah 10,Ezekiel 34.
I And it basically, like inEzekiel, for example, Ezekiel
34, 12, it says, as a shepherdseeks out his flock when he is
among his sheep that have beenscattered, so I will seek out my
sheep and I will rescue them.
And like, this is back in theOld Testament, prophesying that
there's one that's going tocome, a shepherd that's going to
(37:20):
seek out the ones that are lostand he's going to save them and
find them wherever they're at,right?
And if you guys remember backin testimony podcast numero uno,
my testimony that I shared, Imean, that's my story too,
right?
I was encountered in thewilderness very much like Connor
was.
He had an experience where Godwas moving on him, spoke to him
(37:42):
through song, brought a dog tohis feet, showed him a picture
of his state and needing to comeand surrender, and then brought
a multitude around him andbasically grabbed a hold of him
and saved him.
And that's very much like whathappened to me.
I got grabbed a hold of andrescued.
But sometimes we have atendency to be like, oh yeah,
(38:04):
he's the good shepherd thatseeks out and finds the lost
sheep and grabs the sheep andsaves them.
And then they put a period atthe end of that sentence.
But it's actually the sheep isrestored to the fold so that
then they can listen to theshepherd's voice and be led.
And I love how you launchedright into a week later, you're
being led by the Spirit.
You're being led by the voiceof God.
Because you said yes insurrender, you recognized him as
(38:25):
the shepherd who saves us.
And at that point in time, yousaid, yes, you're the shepherd
that I follow now.
And there's a lot of people outthere that are content to be
saved.
They're content to be rescued.
And then they go, oh, thanks somuch.
I got my ticket.
And now I'm just going to livehowever I want.
I'm going to be kind of justwaiting it out till either Jesus
(38:47):
comes back or I die.
And they don't really realizethat the shepherd is constantly
talking to us and wanting us tocome because he's got a plan for
us, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 01 (38:58):
So one of the biggest scriptures that I always
lean on is Jeremiah 29, 11.
You know, for the Lord knowsthe plans he has for you, plans
to prosper, plans not to harmyou, plans for your welfare.
I don't know if I got that deadon or not.
Give you hope in the future.
Hope in the future.
And like, that's very much thestory that he wants to write for
(39:22):
everybody.
Yeah.
And, and, The story, too, to meof the Bible is just a grand
adventure of following the Lordand doing His will.
It always sticks out to me whenI see people that have faith
(39:45):
and love Jesus, but they're notreally doing much.
They're kind of just sittingaround, and that's totally
not...
what the Lord has for us.
My walk with God has been aconstant adventure.
You know, it's been fun.
It's been the most fun I'veever had in my life.
(40:07):
I actually, I said this tosomeone not too long ago, but my
life really didn't start untilthe day I said yes to God.
Speaker 02 (40:16):
Amen.
Yep, 100%.
Speaker 01 (40:18):
That's exactly what happened to me too.
And it just felt like all thoseyears I wasted...
were just burned away, really.
All the guilt I had, all theshame, all that just burned
away.
And there was just one thing onmy mind was how do I seek the
(40:39):
Lord?
And how do I continue to moveforward in what He has for me?
And I just want to encourageanyone that's stuck right now in
the mundaneness of life to...
to ask God, what is the biggerpicture you have for me?
Because I can promise you it'snot sitting in a church pew
(41:03):
saying your Hail Marys and goinghome and turning on the TV.
He has so much more for all ofus.
And it's really, me and Brianwere talking about this earlier
this week, maybe last week, butit's a radical obedience that
(41:24):
God's calling out of us.
He can do so much with yes, buthe can't do really anything
with a no.
He needs your willingness.
He needs your heart.
He needs total surrender onyour end.
And it's not the easiest thingin the world to walk out.
(41:48):
It's really not.
It's actually very hard.
But the Bible tells us that theway to heaven is a thin, narrow
gate.
It's not easy to get through.
And that's for a reason,because God wants us sold out
for Him.
He wants our hearts sold out toHim and Him only.
Speaker 02 (42:09):
Yeah, as you're talking, it's kind of reminding
me of when I first...
gave my life over to Christ, Iwas, um, I was hit with the
reality of the gospel and thereality of what he's, what he's
made available and the salvationand the freedom that he offers.
And I was like, so overwhelmedwith the truth of who God was
like, like the first week, um,after I got saved and baptized,
(42:32):
I like, I started telling thegospel to everyone who would
listen.
I talked to pretty mucheveryone that worked with me.
And there was one guy that Iwas a little bit nervous to
share with.
And, uh, I actually had a dreamthe night before that I was
sharing the gospel with him, andthen he pulled out a gun and
killed me.
And I remember talking withAmy, and I was just so nervous
(42:53):
about going to work that daybecause we woke up in the middle
of the night, and I'm like, Ifeel like I could die tomorrow.
I feel like God maybe warned methat I was going to get shot or
something.
And I remember deciding in thatmoment that I was going to die
to myself, and I was going todie...
to the worry about death.
And so I wrote a note on mykitchen counter and I left it
(43:15):
and I said, I knew what wasgoing to happen to me today and
I chose to go to work anyway.
And I left it on my kitchencounter and we drove to work and
we were running a little bitlate and my wife and I were
driving down the interstate andthere was a vehicle that was
parked out in a parking lot.
It was outside of a brewery andthere was a guy who was kind of
(43:36):
out and he was leaning overlooking at the ground and And he
looked like he was thrown up.
And I was like, well, it's alittle early for like some guy
to be thrown up outside abrewery.
That's a little weird.
And so I just had this littleinclination in my head, like, I
wonder if I should stop and gotalk to him.
And the moment that I had thatthought, our car radio, as we're
driving in a crescendo ofvoices all came together and it
(43:59):
went, ah, stop like queen, youknow, like all that crazy
voices.
And then the radio cut off andI it like startled me.
And I said, we need to turnaround.
We need to turn around.
The Lord is telling us to turnaround.
So, you know, keep in mind thatlike I had a dream.
I died.
I'm on my way to my deathsentence.
And then the Lord stops mehalfway.
(44:20):
And I tell Amy to do U-turn.
We pull into the parking lotand I get out.
And the guy is getting out ofthe side of his car as his wife
is trying to get into thedriver's seat.
And she's like, he doesn't wantto talk to anybody.
We're good.
He doesn't want to talk.
But as she's saying, he doesn'twant to talk.
He's getting out and walkingover to me.
And come to find out that hewas a Christian and he got a
(44:44):
phone call as he was drivingdown the road and took the call
that his brother died.
And his brother was a strongbeliever too.
And he pulled over on the sideof the road and he was crying
and weeping and screaming at thetop of his lungs.
God, I trusted you.
I believe that you are real,but why did you let my brother
die?
I don't believe.
(45:05):
I won't believe unless you sendsomebody right now to tell me.
And as he's screaming out ofthe top of his lungs, God told
me through a car radio to turnaround.
And I told him, I had aknowing, I said, your brother is
with Jesus right now.
And your cries were answered.
He sent me here right now totell you that he loves you, that
he's not done with you, thathe's going to plan a purpose for
(45:27):
you.
And the guy grabbed me in a bigbear hug and he started crying
on my shoulder.
And he told me, I'll rememberthis till the day I die.
And this was right before I wasabout to go and die, right?
So the Lord gave me that.
And I was driving to work therest of the way, just kind of
almost in silence and in awe.
And I said, if that's the way Igo out, then that's the only
(45:50):
way I want to live from now on.
Like that is the perfect way toend this whole life.
And so I remember...
I got in the room with the guyI was a little nervous to share
with that I had dreams about.
He wasn't a bad guy.
He just had a scary dream,right?
And so I share the gospel withhim, and I tell him about my
testimony, but I use the parableof the lost sheep and the good
(46:12):
shepherd.
And I get down to that part inthe dream where he kills me.
And now I'm stringing the storyout a little bit longer.
I'm trying to get a few morebreaths in.
Unknown (46:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 02 (46:24):
And then I kind of like, okay, I don't, I don't
have anything else to say.
So I kind of just stopped and Ijust braced for it, man.
And I really truly believe thatI was going to die.
Um, and instead of pulling outa gun, he sits back and he goes,
you know what?
And he was an atheist and hegoes, I've never told anybody
this story, but like after youtold me that wild story, I feel
(46:44):
fine telling you.
Cause you know, it's not thatcrazy after hearing that.
And, uh, he goes, when I was 12years old, I was walking down
the street and And I was takenup out of my body and I was
hovering above like the earth.
And he said, this being cameover to me and said, ask me
anything.
And he said to the being,what's the meaning of life?
(47:05):
And the being said to be ashepherd.
Wow.
And he was instantly back inhis body and he goes, you know
what?
I've never looked intoChristianity and I've actually
never heard the story aboutJesus being a good shepherd.
But the moment that you told meabout that, it connected with
that moment that I had when Iwas 12 that I've never told
anybody about.
And he said, thank you, stoodup, walked out of my office.
(47:30):
And I didn't die, but that wasthe moment that I resigned my
job and I died to myself anddecided I was going to be spirit
led from then on and onlylisten to the Lord and where he
tells me to go.
But in that moment, I realizedthat when we're saved as a sheep
and we begin to follow theshepherd and we become many
shepherds for others.
And so we actually, in stepwith the shepherd, lose our
(47:53):
identity as a sheep and webecome walking with the shepherd
and so much like him that welead the others behind us in.
And that's what he's called youto.
And in a radical, quick way,over a short amount of time,
He's raised you up to be ashepherd of others.
And even this podcast is yourstart because there's people
that are listening right nowthat are in the same exact
(48:14):
place.
They're lost.
They're broken.
They're empty.
They need help.
They're like a busted andbruised dog.
They need the feet of JesusChrist.
And they need to hear atestimony of someone who's
walked it out and surrenderedand the power that exists on the
other side.
And so you carry that.
And I'm going to let you kindof share your final thoughts or
whatever.
And then I want you to pray.
(48:35):
I'm in that manner for thepeople listening that that might
be lost or maybe the peoplethat are stuck in religion,
stuck in, in the powerlessnessand they're kind of just a sheet
maybe stuck in the, in the, inthe pen.
Speaker 01 (48:47):
So to speak.
Amen.
Amen.
I guess what I want to leaveeveryone with is no matter what
you are telling yourself everyday, No matter how good your
(49:12):
life looks on the outside, Iwant you to take a deep look at
your heart.
I want you to ask yourself, amI really doing this?
Why am I doing this?
Why am I doing these things?
Am I doing it?
(49:33):
to fit in?
Am I doing it because I'mafraid of who people really
might think I am?
Am I doing it because I don'tknow any better?
But really take a look atyourself and ask yourself, is
this really what I want my lifeto look like?
(49:54):
Or is there something more outthere for me?
Because I can promise you, thatwhen I said yes to Jesus and I
put both of my feet in the waterand when I started floating
away, I was taken in immediatelyby the strongest current I've
(50:17):
ever felt in my life that haspushed me into some of the
greatest things I've everwitnessed in my life.
Some of the sweetest momentsI've ever had in my life The
biggest desires of my heart havebeen fulfilled.
And I know that there's so muchmore.
(50:39):
Literally anything is possiblewith our Lord Jesus Christ.
Put down all the fear you haveof losing what you perceive that
you have right now because Ipromise you, you have nothing if
you don't have Jesus in yourheart.
You are literally losingnothing but the world and the
world dies.
(51:00):
But God is eternal, and so isour salvation.
Father, we just lift up all ofthe lost people right now that
are listening to this podcast.
Father, we ask that you justcome down, God, and you just
(51:21):
bear your arm of witness tothem.
Lord, we just ask for yourfavor.
over those who are lost, God,that you wouldn't allow them to
continue to tumble, that youwould pick them up like you
picked me up, God.
God, we just humbly ask you,Lord, to just start revealing
(51:46):
yourself to people that needyour love.
God, if you have to drag someof these people out of the holes
they're in, Lord, I just praythat you drag them out God, I
just know how good you are.
I've seen your goodness in myown life.
(52:07):
God, I just pray for yourgoodness over everybody right
now that's listening to thispodcast that needs it.
You are so good, Lord.
You are so, so good.
And you pulled me out of theriptide right when I needed you
(52:27):
to.
And Lord, I just...
i just see someone right now inthe riptide they're flailing
their arms and they're scaredand they don't know what to do
and they're just begging forhelp lord and i just see you
putting your hand down andpulling them out i just pray
(52:53):
whoever that is that the lordpulls you out of that and he
just brings you ashore He givesyou a crown and a robe and a
ring on your finger.
In the mighty name of Jesus, Ipray.
Amen.
Speaker 02 (53:12):
I hear right now there's someone out there named
Kathy.
Kathy, you've been dealing withdepression.
The Lord is setting you freeright now, right where you are.
At his feet, the Son is settingyou free.
Who the Son sets free is freeindeed.
(53:34):
Let all of that wash off ofyou.
There's freedom in the mightyname of Jesus.
I hear Caleb.
Caleb, you've been dealing withsevere illness.
It's in your lungs.
Receive the healing touch ofGod right now over your lungs.
(54:01):
I believe by faith you're beingset free right now.
Anyone dealing with the spiritof suicide, thinking of taking
their own life, that power isbroken.
In the mighty name of Jesus,you don't struggle with it
(54:23):
anymore.
And right now we just thank theLord For this podcast, for
Connor's testimony, for Anniejoining us, Lord, we just thank
you so much for this powerfultestimony to set people free.
We bless each and every one ofyou as you listen.
(54:45):
Yeah, we're just so excited tobe able to record that and push
it out.
Feel free to go on to thetestimonypodcast.com and share
your testimony of how thisimpacted you, if this ministered
to you.
There's a form you can fill outon there.
We've received amazingtestimonies from people being
set free, pulling over on theside of the road and actually
feeling tangibly the power ofGod coming upon them and setting
them free.
(55:05):
I encourage you to submit thosetestimonies, submit those words
of encouragement for Connor,for Annie, if this ministered to
you in any way.
Join us for the next testimonypodcast.
Thanks, Connor and Annie, forjoining us.
Speaker 01 (55:19):
Thanks for having us on.
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.