September 22, 2024 • 47 mins
I have a confession: I haven't been feeling very creative lately. I've been working on projects behind-the-scenes, but I haven't felt that same creative spark and excitement. I've felt stuck and absorbed in other things, particularly family matters. It made me wonder if you've felt this way at times, too? What can we do to reignite our creativity? Listen in as I share personal stories on why I think we temporarily lose our creativity and how we can try to bring it back.
Want to share your thoughts on this episode or have a question? Email me serena@ thriftdiving.com or on Instagram @ThriftDiving.
MENTIONED & RESOURCES
- Console Table I Built with a Friend! (YouTube)
- My Son Left for College (blog post)
- BEFORE & AFTER: Hakimah's Bathroom Makeover (blog post)
- Workbench Makeover (Youtube)
- Wiring the Electricity in My "She Shed" (Video)
RESOURCES
Subscribe to my email list for 5 ebooks, printable, and checklists: https://thriftdiving.com/subscribe
Subscribe to my YouTube channel:
https://www.youtube.com/user/thriftdiving
Let’s Connect!
WANT TO LEARN TO USE POWER TOOLS? I'm creating an online power tools 101 course to help you get over the fear and intimidating of using tools to become empowered with power tools! Sign up here for more info! https://thriftdiving.com/tools
Subscribe to my email list for 5 ebooks, printable, and checklists: https://thriftdiving.com/subscribe
Subscribe to my YouTube channel:
https://www.youtube.com/user/thriftdiving
Let’s Connect!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Serena (00:00):
Sometimes you just have to give yourself some grace.
I think we hold ourselves toreally high standards of
productivity, right?
We know that we're a creativeperson, so I should be working
on this.
Regardless of the fact that youmight have just lost your job
and maybe you're about to loseyour home, maybe you're
(00:21):
struggling to figure out wherethe next paycheck is coming from
, the last thing that you'regoing to do is sit down with a
piece of furniture and startpainting Like it just doesn't.
It doesn't make sense.
So we have to give ourselvesgrace for where we are in our
life and the things that we'redealing with, and letting
ourselves know that, okay, I'mstill a creative person.
(00:41):
I'm just focused on some otherthings these fires that need to
be put out.
We're gonna make it look flywith some DIY.
We're gonna make it look flywith some DIY.
We're gonna make it look flywith some DIY.
Uh-oh, thrift diving.
Hey, what's up?
It's Serena Pia fromthriftdivingcom, which is a
(01:02):
do-it-yourself blog, youtubechannel and podcast that helps
you decorate, improve andmaintain your home with paint,
power tools and thrift storeswithout sacrificing your budget,
the environment or style.
Welcome to episode 147 of theThrift Diving Podcast, and I
realize it has been an entiremonth and a half since I've
(01:23):
posted an episode.
What is going on?
Well, I will tell you that Iwas inspired tonight to do an
episode about creativity becauseI realized something so
important and I'm going to tellyou all about that story and
what happened with my friend andwhy I felt so compelled to get
(01:43):
back to podcasting.
I know I didn't tell you that Iwas even taking a break, but I
took a break and I was notfeeling very creative and so in
this episode I'm going to dig inand tell you the stories of why
creativity just sort ofdisappears and what is it that's
causing you to be in a creativeslump.
(02:04):
If you're feeling in a creativeslump like I am, what is the
cause of that and how do we getout of it?
So welcome back to the podcast.
I was like I just need to do anepisode because I was so
inspired and let me just kind ofshare with you where I've been
in the last few months andwhat's been going on.
So if you follow my blog,you'll know that my son had left
(02:26):
for college back in July.
He did a summer program, a sixweek summer program, and I was
all in my feels about that.
So, dealing with that and thenjust a lot of personal things
going on.
Now, even though I have all ofthat going on, I still have been
working on some projects behindthe scenes, but they have been
taking so long because they'renot projects that are directly
(02:49):
in my control.
These are projects that I'lltell you about them in just a
moment, but these are projectsthat I've been doing with other
people Because you know, ifyou've been following thrift
diving for any length of time,you'll know that all of my
projects, for the most up untilthis year, have been in my own
home, and so when I'm doing myown projects, I have control
over when it gets done.
(03:10):
If I'm delayed, you know whatmaterials I'm using.
All of that is under mydiscretion.
Well, these last two projects,or these most recent projects, I
should say these are projectsthat I have been doing with
other people and other people'shomes, and when you work with
someone in that capacity, youdon't really have that much
(03:30):
control.
You've you're coordinatingschedules and you know you're
having to travel and it's just alot more work.
So let's talk about what's beengoing on and why I've not been
feeling creative, and I want youto let me know.
Send me an email, because Ineed to know are you feeling
this creative slump like I am?
I've been in a creative slump,even though I've been working on
(03:52):
projects with other people.
I've not been feeling thisdrive to create, and I think I
have some answers as for why ithappens, and I want you to think
about your own life and we'regoing to talk about, I think,
the psychology behind it andwhere we can maybe try to start
pulling ourselves out of thiscreative slump.
(04:14):
So the first project that I'vebeen working on is the bedroom
makeover of my friend who, ifyou remember, back in January I
was doing a bathroom makeoverwith her.
This was for bathroom week, soI don't know if you caught this
on my YouTube channel.
I will leave links down below.
But we completely gutted whysay gutted?
It feels like we got it Hervery small bathroom.
(04:35):
This was the first project thatI'd ever done in somebody
else's home.
She's been my best friend forabout 15 years and the makeover
was amazing.
She didn't think that we wereeven going to be able to turn
this bathroom into a completelynew looking bathroom with just
refinishing things.
We've finished her tub.
We were finished the tilesurrounding her tub, we did the
(04:58):
floors, we painted, and I had areally great friend who donated
a I believe it was a granitecountertop so that we could
replace the sink, and all ofthat.
So the bathroom came outfantastic.
Well, if you remember that video, at the very end she's like
Serena, I think I'm ready towork on my bedroom.
And I said, okay, I promise youwe're going to work on your
(05:19):
bedroom.
Well, we started her bedroom inJune and here to September and
we are just getting done herbedroom.
I kid you not, we started inJune and it wasn't just her and
I, it was actually her friend,who is an attorney but who also
decided later she wanted tostudy interior design.
So when she realized, oh, wedid her bathroom, well, if you
(05:42):
do another project, I want to beinvited as part of that project
.
And so we drew her into thisbedroom makeover and it's been
all three of us trying torecreate this really cozy space,
that eclectic, cozy space thatmy friend Hykema is her name
wanted to create.
So we've been working on thatand because we don't have much
(06:04):
time during the week, we've beenkind of doing it during
weekends and it's.
It's taken a really long time.
Now don't let that timelinescare you.
It should not take that long todo a bedroom makeover.
If you were in your own houseand doing a bedroom makeover, at
the maximum it probably wouldtake you four to six weeks,
depending on what you're doingin there.
Now, we were not likecompletely building new built-in
(06:30):
bookcases or anything like that, but there was just a lot of
work that had to get done and wehad limited amount of time.
So that's one project that I'vebeen working on.
The other project that I've beenworking on is building a
console table with my friend, bj, who is he knows his way around
tools, so it wasn't likeworking with Hikima.
Hikima has been a completenewbie.
When we did her bathroom, shehad never even painted a wall
(06:52):
before.
So this was kind of a coolproject because BJ wanted to
build a console table for hiswife.
He had the insight of okay, Ithink I know how I want to
design this and I know whatparts need to come together, but
, serena, I need your insight.
Like, I think I know how I wantto design this and I know what
parts need to come together, but, serena, I need your insight,
like I don't quite know if I'mgoing to be on the right path, I
think I'm going to have to usea jigsaw.
(07:14):
I don't really know how to usea jigsaw, but I can use a table
saw.
So his experience level was alittle bit higher.
Now his wife wanted this consoletable because she went to
HomeGoods one day.
She saw this console table.
That was I don't know how, itwas modern, but it was just kind
of like a 1970s, looking kindof cool with arches console
table.
And she said, well, hey, I'mgoing to buy this, it's $400.
(07:38):
And he said, no, no, no, no,don't buy that baby, I can make
that for you.
So he made this grandiosepromise and you know, with his
engineering background, he feltlike you know what?
I can sketch this up, I can dothis.
And then that's when he calledme in to kind of help him.
We didn't envision that this wasgoing to be a project where,
okay, I'm going to bring mycamera, we're going to record it
(08:00):
, we're going to paint it, we'regoing to top coat it.
He just thought I was going tocome in and just kind of give
him some pointers.
Or hey, here's how you use thejigsaw to do the arches.
It turned into a whole quoteunquote production and it was
the most fun project I mean.
There we are building thisthing, trying to piecemeal it
together, right?
He had sketched out all theparts based on the pictures that
(08:22):
his wife took from HomeGoods,and he had a general idea of how
it was going to be built.
So we went to Home Depot, wegot all the materials and then I
showed up at his house one dayand his wife's like oh, oh, wait
, you're going to help him build.
Great, because he wants me to.
Like hold this, do that.
I'm not trying to do any ofthat.
So you guys have at it and letme know how it goes.
(08:45):
So we took, I guess, probablythe last month really.
But again, it's one of thoseprojects where you're working on
something in someone else'shouse, so you're not
consistently every day, you know, chipping away at it.
So we had to kind of plan outwhen he was going to be working
from home, when I could come andhelp him and all the parts and
(09:05):
pieces.
But that project looks amazingand we just finished that.
So that was something that wascreative and I did feel like I
was tapping into my creativity alittle bit, but when it came to
my own projects, I couldn'treally muster up the creativity
to move forward with doing myown stuff.
(09:25):
After I did the workbench in myshe shed which you should see
that on my YouTube channel Ididn't really feel like there
was anything that I personallywanted to work on other than,
okay, we started the bedroommakeover, great, we're painting,
we're putting some pictures upon the walls, you know,
fantastic.
But again, those were far andfew between because we're
(09:47):
coordinating schedules.
So all that time in between Ididn't feel like I wanted to
work on anything in my own house.
I didn't feel like I wanted tobuild anything.
I've got a really nice vintagedresser that I moved into my she
shed probably about a month agoand it's just been sitting
there.
I've not wanted to strip it, Iwas not sure if I wanted to
paint it and it's just beensitting there and the creative
(10:09):
spark was just wah, wah, wah.
So, anyway, let me tell you howI came to this podcast episode,
and this is why I like havingpodcast episodes that are kind
of on the fly, because it'ssomething that I'm mulling
around in my brain or somethingthat happens that just sparks me
.
Trust me, this is not howpodcasting is supposed to go.
You're supposed to have aneditorial calendar with maybe
(10:33):
interviews lined up.
You're supposed to have aschedule.
It's not about whether you'reinspired to do it, you just sit
down and you do it.
You work by your schedule.
But with this podcast, I reallyhave not operated that way.
It's really just kind of beenhey, I have this idea or this
thing that happened that I justhave to talk to you about
because it sparks somethinginside of me.
(10:54):
Anyway, that is how it happenedtonight.
So I go to my friend's house,hakima we're just finishing up
this bedroom makeover.
But before I get to her house,we're talking on the phone this
afternoon and she says thecurtain rods came and I got this
piece of artwork and that pieceof artwork and you know we're
ready to hang these curtains.
And and I said Well, I've gotsomething that I'm going to
bring over to you, some pillowsthat some brand had sponsored.
(11:16):
And she said Well, I got asurprise for you.
Well, she didn't really say asurprise for me, but she said
she had a surprise.
And I'm like what is it?
She didn't want to tell me.
And I said to her.
Well, I've got a surprise foryou.
She's like what?
Okay?
So what my surprise was is thatI am currently working on a
video with a heat press.
(11:38):
So there's a company that sentme this really cool heat press.
It's a whole kit like an eightin one heat press.
Really cool heat press.
It's a whole kit like an eightin one heat press.
And I was making some t shirtsand basically it's just just
sort of like an unboxing kind ofvideo and I really like it.
It has a.
You know, I have a Cricut.
I do have the Cricut heatpresses that you hold by, you
know, by your hand.
(11:58):
It's got the timer and all thatand they work great.
But I was really curious aboutmaybe a more professional heat
press.
So the company sent it to me.
I was making some t shirts andI thought I don't really want to
just post t shirts on myYouTube channel, like that's
kind of boring.
I would like to make a pillow.
Well, we're doing this bedroommakeover.
I could make a pillow forHykema.
So I went to the craft store,bought some materials and, if
(12:23):
you remember her bathroommakeover, we had created some
cricket art for the wall and itwas a picture of like a
silhouette of black, of a blackwoman with an afro, and she's
kind of smiling and she's gotthese beautiful bright pink lips
.
This is what Hikima and I hadpicked out and we thought it was
a great pop of color for herbathroom.
So I decided, okay, well, Iknow that she likes that image.
(12:46):
Why don't I do that same imageon a pillow?
And the fabric that I boughtwas like a denim type fabric,
because I know she likes denim,and it was like a black denim, a
faded black denim, and I'mgoing to take some glitter iron
on and I'll do that same imageon a pillow and we'll do that as
part of, you know, thedemonstration for this heat
(13:08):
press Plus it.
You know, you kill two birdswith one stone.
You're making a pillow testingout this heat press and I'm also
making a pillow for her room.
So I went there tonight withthis pillow in a bag and I was
just kind of hiding it behind,you know, the wall and I didn't
want to show her what mysurprise was.
Well, do you know what hersurprise was?
Her surprise was that she hadthis easel set up in her bedroom
(13:30):
.
Now again, her bedroom makeoveris not completely done, but she
had this easel set up with apiece of art that she was
painting.
Now let me tell you how amazingthis is, because my friend
Hakima I've known her for 15years I have never, ever heard
of her creating art.
(13:50):
I've never heard her talk aboutwanting to paint.
I've never heard that she hadcreated artwork and painted in
the past.
It was a part of ourrelationship that we had never
talked about, even though sheknew hey, I'm thrift diving, I'm
creating art and I'm painting,I'm doing all this.
She's never said hey, by theway, serena, I'm creative.
(14:12):
And so when I walked into theroom and I saw this cool piece
of art and she was inspired bythis artist.
I cannot think of his name, Iwill have to find it and leave
it down in the show notes, butit's a.
It's a black artist who haddied at 27 of a cocaine overdose
.
Some of you may know, I think,john Batista or something like
that.
I will find the exact name andput it down below.
(14:33):
She was inspired by his artworkand so she created kind of like
a rendition of of what he wouldhave created.
And it was so cool.
I first of all, not only did.
It look good and the colorswere great.
But the fact that my friend,who I have known for 15 years,
felt inspired enough to put upan easel and a canvas and start
(14:57):
painting, I told her.
I said I am so proud of youLike I couldn't stop telling her
I am so proud of you.
It made me feel like a mamabear, who I don't want to say I
led her to be creative.
But this bedroom makeover thatthat her friend and I that all
three of us are doing inspiredher to pull out these paints
(15:18):
that her sister had gotten her,this set of crafting paints
years ago that she had neverused, and she was inspired to
create this artwork for her wall.
I felt so proud of her.
You have to understand thehistory of of Hikima and she and
I are going to get on a podcastepisode episode soon and talk
about her bedroom makeover andall of that.
(15:40):
But if you had caught herprevious interview that we had
done when we were done herbathroom, we talked about it.
She talked about confidenceissues.
She talked about wanting tomake a change in her life so
that she would tell herself.
You know what?
I can do that?
Because for a lot of a lot ofher life.
She just didn't feel confident.
And the crazy thing is that ifyou talk to her, if you engage
(16:03):
with her, you would never thinkthis is a woman that has
confidence issues.
This is a woman who self esteem, you know, has taken a hit all
of her life due to you know allthese different circumstances.
You would never even imaginethat, because you know, normally
when you think about somebodythat has confidence issues or
self esteem issues, a lot oftimes they put themselves down,
(16:23):
don't they?
I'm sure you have somebody inyour life that you talk to that
you know they have confidenceissues and they'll say things
like I'm fat, or I'm just notcreative, or well, I could never
do that.
I don't know if I'm smartenough to do that Like these are
these self deprecating thingsthat we say to ourselves.
She never says those things,but she says them to herself in
(16:44):
her mind.
So before we started her bedroommakeover, we're actually taking
it back further.
Before we started her bathroommakeover, she was telling me
this was at the beginning of theyear, actually a little bit
before that that she wasstarting to change her mindset
(17:05):
and telling herself you knowwhat I can do things.
I can take on that position.
I can take on moreresponsibility at work, being a
project manager.
I can do that.
And so when I had presented toher hey, we've got this bedroom
or bathroom makeover.
Do you want to do it?
Her first thought was, no, Idon't think it's going to work
out Like.
That's what she wanted to sayto me.
But she said you know what,serena, I think I can, I think
we can do this, let's do it.
I'm not feeling confident aboutit, but I'm trying to move in
(17:26):
that direction.
So that's what we did.
We tackled this bathroommakeover and she's just really
took that project by both hornsand was like oh, I'm painting
walls and I'm scraping floorsand I'm doing all this stuff, I
can do this.
And so it built her confidence.
It was this project that addedto her confidence bucket.
(17:48):
She and I talked about this alot, about building your
confidence bucket and doingthings that just adds to that
bucket instead of doing thingsthat take away right.
So then now we're doing thisbedroom makeover.
It's been since June.
We have painted the walls, wepainted the ceilings.
(18:09):
She picked out the colors right.
So there wasn't a lot of designfrom my endpoint, but I was the
one that was kind of leading it.
Well, we were all leading itreally I don't want to take
credit for that but we were allcoordinating this.
It really I don't want to takecredit for that, but we were all
coordinating this and shereally started to unleash more
of this creativity that she hadlocked inside of her for years
that I had never even witnessed.
And so when she showed me thiseasel with this painting that
(18:30):
she's working on, I was so proudof her and I had to.
I had to ask her well, wheredid this come from?
So she told me that she waswatching some it must have been
like an HGTV type show, andthere was a woman on there I
think it was a realtor who wasat some point talking about how
she used to paint or something,and Hikima was inspired by this.
(18:51):
She's like oh wait, a minute, Iused to paint, I'm going to get
some canvases, I'm going topull out the paints, I'm going
to work on this painting andit's going to be part of the
gallery wall that we're puttingover my bed.
So we're done.
We're about halfway done thegallery wall.
We didn't finish that part yet,but listening to this woman talk
about how she used to paint.
There was something that justsnapped inside of her that was
(19:13):
like I'm going to start paintingagain.
And she pulled out all thesematerials and she just started
painting.
So when I walked into herbedroom tonight and I saw that,
I was like are you kidding me?
I am so proud of you.
Where did this creativity comefrom?
And then she told me about thisand I said to her I said,
hakima, I want you to understandsomething you know.
(19:33):
Yes, you were inspired by thisepisode.
I want you to think about howyou got to this point.
It was that bathroom makeoverthat started unlocking this
creativity inside of you,building this confidence inside
of you.
And then, from there, we wentto your bedroom makeover.
Right, we painted the walls,you're looking at artwork,
(19:54):
you're creating this cozy spacefor yourself that you've always
wanted.
Now, if you were to see thebefore picture and you will see
the before pictures of Hakima'sbedroom you will understand that
in that space, in her bedroom,the way it was, there was no way
that she could have gotten tothis point of expressing this
creativity.
There was no way.
First of all, there was nospace, and when she was
(20:17):
surrounded by I don't even knowthe right word.
I don't even want to sayclutter, but I guess it was
clutter.
When she was surrounded by this, it was hard for her to unlock
that creativity.
Right, the project that we didin her bathroom started to
unlock it.
But I feel like if we had notgotten to her bedroom, that
(20:38):
creativity would not have evenbeen unlocked and I felt proud
of her.
But I felt like, oh my gosh,this is a real life example of
me helping somebody discoverthat creativity.
And even as I talk about itright now, I have goosebumps.
I'm not kidding you.
I wish that.
I wish I was actually recordingvideo, but I'm sitting here in
(20:59):
my pajamas.
My hair looks crazy.
There's no way you can catch meon camera looking like this.
But just imagine if you couldsee me.
I have these goosebumps on myarm, because this is my life's
purpose, right Create, inspireand teach.
And seeing somebody who, for thelast 15 years that I have known
her, her house has remained thesame.
She's always talked aboutthings she's wanted to do in her
(21:21):
house, but she didn't have theability to move that forward.
And I was able to move thatforward with her bathroom
makeover and then her friend andI were able to bring that with
her on this journey of creatingthis cozy, beautiful space.
Her bedroom looks amazing.
We're not done yet.
I mean we still have to put thenew bed on the new.
(21:42):
She's keeping the same bed, butwe still have to put the new
mattress.
We've got sheets coming.
She just got her new comforterin the mail that she ordered.
So the bedding and all thatstuff, all the little fine
pieces, haven't been added, butthey're there, they're ready to
go and we're going to finish itup this week.
(22:03):
But I was so inspired by thatthat it got me thinking about
creativity and I'm like I got torecord an episode on this and
that's how I ended up here,because you know, there's a lot
of times when you know I'mthinking about, oh, I should do
a podcast episode, and then Ithink to myself I'm not really
inspired, like what is it that Iwant to talk about?
And it got me thinking aboutsomething that I've been having
(22:25):
offline discussions about,something called Maslow's
hierarchy of needs.
Now, if you are interested inpsychology, if you were a
psychology major, maybe you tookpsych 101 when you were in
college or psych 100.
This wouldn't be newinformation, right?
But I've been pointing this outto a lot of people lately and I
feel like this is the frameworkfor how we get stuck in our
(22:49):
creativity.
I believe there's like fivedifferent levels At the bottom
of this triangle.
The idea is that you have tohave your most basic needs met
before you can even think aboutanything else.
That comes higher on thattriangle, and it's true, right?
So the basic foundation of thisMaslow's hierarchy of needs,
this triangle, is yourphysiological needs, and part of
(23:12):
your physiological needs arethe things like breathing and
food, water, shelter, clothing,sleep, like.
If you don't have these basicneeds met, you can't think about
anything else as part of thistriangle, right?
So let's go through thedifferent sections so that you
know what they are.
So again, these are yourphysiological needs.
That makes up the base.
(23:34):
It kind of looks like a foodpyramid, right?
So you think about the foodpyramid.
And what did they always teachyou in school?
Well, your carbohydrates, yourbreads, pastas.
That kind of makes up thebottom.
Well, for the Maslow's hierarchyof needs, it's the
physiological needs, and then,above that is your safety and
security.
That's your health, it's yourjob, your employment, your
(23:56):
property, your home, your family, but that's your safety and
security, your health, youremployment, your property, your
family, where you fit in withyour friends, and all of that.
And then the next level up islove and belonging, and so
that's your friendships, yourfamily, your intimacy and your
sense of connection with otherpeople, with the world.
And then the next level up isyour self-esteem so we talked
(24:20):
about that with Hikima.
That's your confidence, yourachievement, your need to be a
unique individual and, they say,like, your respect of others.
And then self-actualization isat the very tip of this pyramid,
and so the things that theyhave listed there in the
Maslow's hierarchy of needs isyour morality, your creativity
(24:42):
there's that word yourspontaneity, your sense of
purpose and meaning and innerpotential and all that self
actualization.
So the idea is that you needall of these other things met
before you can actually getself-actualization, which is the
creativity and the purpose andmeaning and all of that good
(25:03):
stuff.
So let's think about Hikima'sexample.
Right, when I look at this, Ithink about those conversations
that she and I had aboutself-esteem early on, before we
even did the bathroom project.
We talked about her confidencelevel being low and how she was
changing her mindset in order tostart feeling more confidence
and doing things that fill herconfidence bucket friendship,
(25:26):
family intimacy, sense ofconnection by us working on
these projects together.
You have no idea how muchconnection that Hakeem and I
created with doing these twoprojects her bathroom and then
her bedroom.
She and I, I told you, we'vebeen friends for 15 years.
She is like my sister fromanother mister right, as the
(25:46):
saying goes, but over the lastnumber of years I think we had
kind of fallen off a bit.
There wasn't any one particularthing.
It's just life gets busy andyou start losing connection.
You go out every now and then,but you're not really hanging
out.
We all have those friendshipsthat, for whatever reason, start
to kind of fade away a littlebit.
Well, these projects reallybrought us together.
(26:09):
The amount of time it takes topaint walls.
You're doing.
You know this is like a weekendproject and then you're sending
text messages back and forth,talking on the doing.
You know this is like a weekendproject and then you're sending
text messages back and forth,talking on the phone, talking
about okay, well, what do weneed to buy?
What bedding did you get?
You're creating this sense ofconnection and that's what those
projects did for her and I.
It really brought us backtogether in a way that I don't
(26:31):
know if we would have come backtogether so closely if it hadn't
been for these two projects.
But when you look at hercreativity, how did she get to
that point of being able to workon that painting, to start to
feel like you know what I can, Ican do that.
I can get back into painting,because I used to do that when I
(26:51):
was younger.
All of these things were met forher her physiological needs,
right.
She's got food, water, herhealth and safety and we'll talk
about this in some upcomingepisodes.
Hikima has had some scares,having to do biopsies and all of
that.
She's a breast cancer survivorand I believe she had been
(27:16):
diagnosed in 2018.
She's been in good health, butthis has been a tough year for
her and we're going to talkabout that.
I'm going to invite her ontothe podcast for October, which
is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
I know it's not anythingrelated to thrift diving.
I love talking about health.
I love talking about being thebest that you can be so that,
once your health is taken careof and you feel good about your
health, you can be creative.
Again, it's this wholehierarchy of needs, with her
(27:37):
going through some of the thingsthat she went through this year
with going to do biopsies andthat fear.
But once she realized, oh, I'mokay, that was checked off.
And then again, as I mentioned,the friendship that we had
rediscovered and the sense ofconnection and then her building
her confidence.
That is how she got to hercreative space.
(27:58):
If you are somebody who isdealing with any number of these
issues, you're not going to beable to be creative.
It's not going to be there foryou.
And this is what I've beengoing through.
My health is okay, but I feellike I'm kind of stuck in the
middle of this pyramid, thisMaslow's hierarchy of need, with
love and belonging, you know,friendship.
(28:20):
I've had some family issuesgoing on.
You know there's some intimacyissues going on, a sense of
connection issues, and so I'venot really been able to move up
this pyramid over the lastcouple of months, and so that's
why I've been feeling so stuck.
That's why you haven't seen anyvideos from me, because I am
(28:40):
not really in that mood tocreate, even though I have been
working on these two projects.
I don't feel that sense of likejoy of creating, because I'm
stuck further down this Maslow'shierarchy of needs.
I feel like I'm so focused onall of those other things that I
can't and haven't been able toreally get to that top pyramid.
(29:01):
So that's kind of where I'vebeen.
You know my mom.
She has been dealing withhealth issues and she is someone
who's always loved to scrapbook.
She's been she.
She loves to do puzzles andthose kind of things, but in the
last year, I mean, her healthhas really taken a hit.
So her physiological needs, hersafety and security, these are
(29:23):
threatened.
And so if you are somebody whois dealing with these kind of
issues, how do you be creative?
How do you get back to beingable to enjoy scrapbooking For
me?
How do I get back to feelingcontent, being in my shed
painting furniture by myself?
I feel like for this year andactually if you remember me
(29:45):
talking about goals and stufflast year, at the beginning of
2023, one of the importantthings that I had said for
myself was the three themes thatI was focusing on was
connection, flow and simplicity.
Themes that I was focusing onwas connection, flow and
simplicity.
Those were the three themes andI think the one that took the I
(30:06):
would say the precedence wasconnection.
I have enjoyed connecting withmy friends, connecting with
people that I love, connectingwith family, and I think that
has taken a lot of my time.
The connection that I've beenbuilding with other people of my
time, the connection that I'vebeen building with other people
and sometimes being in my shedworking by myself and listening
to the Golden Girls, because youknow I love the Golden Girls,
(30:30):
right, you know I love theGolden Girls and I will tell you
also love Family Matters withSteve Urkel.
It's one of those shows thatyou can just put on in the
background and it just feelscozy because you know the
episode, you know what they'regoing to say.
I've watched it a million timesand I will turn on these shows
and just enjoy creating bymyself.
Well, because I'm so focused oncreating connections with people
, I find myself less and lesswanting to work by myself in my
(30:55):
shed and it's hard to admit thatbecause I'm someone that's
always been very well.
I know it's hard to believethis, but I consider myself to
be a extroverted introvert.
I love interacting with people.
I can do it on a stage, I cando it behind a video camera, I
can do it in person.
But if I have too muchinteraction I need that time to
(31:18):
just just breathe and justregroup and get re-energized.
But I find myself lately justwanting to be with other people
and talk to other people andconnect with them.
Even when I'm in like publicand I'm walking, or if I'm
running or going to a store, Iget so much energy out of just
(31:38):
even having an interaction witha stranger.
It just makes me happy andthere's science behind that.
So it's not just me.
Are you somebody?
That's like that too?
My kids they think I'm weird,they're like oh, why are you
talking to that person?
And I say to them because itmakes me feel good, I smile, I
like connecting with people andso, if you notice this theme
(31:59):
that's really taking precedencein my life it's working on the
bedroom makeover with Hikima,it's working with my friend BJ
on building the console table.
I find myself gravitatingtowards projects that allow me
to connect with other people anddo different things but have
that sense of connection.
And so that's the times when Ifeel most creative and happy is
(32:21):
when I'm working with otherpeople.
Working by myself, it feels itjust feels a little lonely and I
think because I'm so focused onconnection and intimacy and
just having that sense ofcommunity that I'm really
gravitating towards thoseprojects.
But then my own individualprojects.
I'm like do I really want to beworking with my headphones on
(32:42):
listening to Dateline podcast,which is what I did and how I
got through the?
You know, the three months ittook took me to wire my entire
she shed.
That was a very lonesomeproject.
I was not lonely, but to thinkof doing that right now I don't
know if I want to work on thosekind of projects.
I want to work with otherpeople and I feel like, even as
(33:04):
I'm saying this, I'm feelinglike that is my truth.
I want that connection.
I want to do projects that aregoing to improve other people's
lives, because seeing how Hykemahas really kind of moved up
that hierarchy of needs andbeing this confident woman and
loving the space that she's inthis oasis that she's building
(33:25):
for herself, that feels reallygood for me and it feels like
I'm actually honoring what mylife's purpose is to help people
create and inspiring them to dothat.
So that's kind of what I'mgoing through and in this
episode I didn't want to justtalk about why I think
creativity can end up in thetoilet.
I also wanted to talk about somestrategies, things that I'm
(33:47):
currently using, things that I'mtrying to use myself or
planning to use.
So let's talk about the firstone.
I think the first suggestionthat I have for you and this is
what I'm trying to keep in mindfor myself is that sometimes you
just have to give yourself somegrace.
I think we hold ourselves toreally high standards of
(34:08):
productivity, right?
We know that we're a creativeperson, so I should be working
on this.
Regardless of the fact that youmight have just lost your job
and maybe you're about to loseyour home, maybe you're
struggling to figure out wherethe next paycheck is coming from
, the last thing that you'regoing to do is sit down with a
piece of furniture and startpainting Like it just doesn't.
(34:30):
It doesn't make sense.
So we have to give ourselvesgrace for where we are in our
life and the things that we'redealing with, and letting
ourselves know that, okay, I'mstill a creative person.
I'm just focused on some otherthings, these fires that need to
be put out.
Another suggestion that may ormay not work for you is to try
(34:51):
journaling.
I have to admit I love, love,love writing.
I can sit down at my computerand I can journal for a good two
hours.
I tell you that because I'vedone it.
There are days when I'm mullingover.
Well, this happened.
What do I think about that?
How do I feel about this?
It's like my journal is my ownpersonal therapist, right, like
(35:14):
I am my own personal therapistand I get it all out on the
pages.
And you may or may not besomeone who's as prolific with
words.
I did suggest this to a friendrecently who's going through
some issues and he's like, yeah,I'm not gonna do that.
I don't like to write, I'm notgood at it, and I think if
that's you, then why don't youtry suggestion number three,
(35:38):
which is well, you could talk tosomeone, right, you could try
therapy, and I just recently hadI don't know.
It seems like all the peoplethat are in my life right now.
They are very pro-therapy.
Not that I've ever beenanti-therapy, but I love the
idea of talking to someone whois a professional who can give
you some feedback and insight.
Probably in the spring I hadtried, you know, reaching out
(35:58):
with a therapist and I tried afew sessions.
Didn't really care for him toomuch Because of some of the
suggestions he gave me, I didn'tlike it.
I was like I'm gonna findsomebody else and I have not
been able to find somebody else.
But if you're somebody whofeels like you need someone to
talk to, journaling just isn'tcutting it for you.
You're not a writer, you don'thave the insight.
You really need someprofessional help.
(36:19):
Therapy is always an option youcan go to.
I believe the site that peoplehave recommended to me is
psychologytodaycom, and theyhave tons of psychologists,
therapists on there.
I believe they've gotpsychiatrists as well and you
can just email them and see ifthey accept your insurance.
So definitely look into that.
(36:40):
But you know, if you're like Idon't think I want to do therapy
, I think I just need to talk tofriends, I can tell you that I
have been sending so manymessages back and forth with my
friend Nakia.
She and I met about, I want tosay, eight years ago.
She's also into thrifting andthrift diving and all of that
stuff, and so that's how we met.
She was in the creative spaceof thrift diving and she was a
(37:05):
content creator, and so weconnected.
We kind of fell off for a while, but in the last few months, oh
my gosh, we have been sendingmessages back and forth, audio
messages.
We don't even talk on the phone.
We will send like 10 minutemessages and triples have full
conversations with each otherthat we're just listening to as
(37:25):
we clean or as we're on the go.
Or, you know, as I said in myshe shed working on a project or
something, I will send messagesto her.
So you know, you have to findthat person that you can open up
, to find that person who willlisten to you so that you can
express yourself and kind ofwork through that.
It is kind of like therapy, butit's a release, and so I would
(37:46):
tell you to find that personthat you can talk to, like I
have.
Also, too, there's another appthat I like, aside from just
sending audio messages through.
You know, your messengerservice is to try Marco Polo, so
that's a video messaging app.
I love it.
It's a really great way to keepin contact with friends, but
(38:08):
it's so convenient because youcan just listen when it's
convenient.
You can send messages when it'sconvenient.
And back to the audio messages.
My mom, she you know I won'tget into all of the discussion
on that, but she's alone for alot of a lot of the day, and so
I even got her started on audiomessages so that she has a way
to keep in contact with me.
(38:28):
That makes her feel like she'sgot someone there with her
during the day.
So you know, that is reallyimportant.
And another idea, like Imentioned with Hikima and BJ, do
a project with a friend, if youlike being creative, but you
know you're kind of missing outon that connection then suggest
a room makeover with a friend,or find a project that you can
(38:51):
paint together or that you canbuild together can build
together, and it's somethingshared that you can do together.
And so now you've got somethingthat you're focused on outside
of all the other issues that youhave going on.
Another strategy is trying adifferent hobby.
You know it could be thatyou're just bored with the
hobbies that you know how to do,but there's something about
(39:12):
learning something new thatgives you this spark of joy, of
wonder, because now there's thisthing that you want to learn
how to do and you're researchingit and you're excited about
this new thing.
It probably releases dopamine,right, and that's what makes us
happy, that's what allows us tofeel good, and when you start
(39:34):
something new, when you'retrying a new hobby, there's that
rush of dopamine.
I know that there is because Ifeel it when I try something new
, and I'll tell you aboutsomething new that I tried
recently that I had no idea wasas cool as it is.
I went golfing for the firsttime.
Yes, I went on a nine-holecourse and did golfing with my
(39:55):
friend BJ.
So remember the console tablethat he and I just finished up.
We were applying the top coatone day and it needed to dry
anyway.
So I said, okay, well, we'redone, let's go and do golf.
We had gone to the drivingrange twice, so I felt confident
in knowing how to swing a golfclub.
Now would I be able totranslate that to a golf course
(40:19):
to do nine holes?
Let me tell you, the weatherwas perfect.
I guess you could say I didn'tdo very well, right, like if it
was a par four.
I was like par eight, par nine.
So I didn't really do all thatgreat before.
A complete newbie, a completebeginner.
I did pretty good and I feltreally excited over the prospect
(40:39):
of hey, I can get some golfclubs, or maybe not even a whole
set, I can buy something new.
So I'm not investing too muchmoney into this new thing, that
I don't really know how muchtime I'm going to have to invest
in it, but it felt reallyexciting to try something
different and that helped.
I think that helped to kind ofspark me a little bit and I
(40:59):
don't know about sparking mycreativity, but it was because I
don't know if you would call ita creative hobby I guess
probably some people do but itwas something interesting,
something new that I tried.
So if you're kind of bored withsome of the hobbies that you're
used to doing, try something new.
Pick up a new sport, mayberesearch how to do some knitting
(41:19):
, or something that you didn'tthink could be as cool as it was
.
I'll tell you, I had thoughtthat golfing was just something
that old men did.
I had no idea that there are somany young people that are
golfing and it's just, it's kindof cool being introduced to a
whole new world of somethingthat you you just didn't even
(41:39):
know.
So maybe that's what you needis to just try something
different.
Try a new hobby, try a newsport, go to a different place
and see how other people arespending their time doing this
thing that you thought you knew,but you really had no idea.
And the last thing is try not tobe motivated by feeling.
You know, a lot of times wedon't do things because, well, I
(42:03):
just don't feel like it.
I don't feel like exercising,so I'm not going to go today.
I don't feel like beingcreative, so I'm not going to
pull out that piece of furnitureor that paintbrush.
I don't feel like cutting thatwood, so I'm just not going to
start that project.
And when we operate on how wefeel, there's a lot of
opportunity that we waste.
(42:24):
And I would say and this is whatI struggle with as well try to
build a habit of the thing thatyou want to commit to.
So for me, exercising is ahabit, at the very least.
I know that I've got to go fora three mile walk every day.
If I don't walk that day, thenmaybe I'll run.
If I don't run, then I've gotto lift weights.
(42:45):
I've got to do something,because that's the habit that I
established for myself.
So it's not a matter of I don'treally feel like walking today,
or the weather is just it's toohot, it's too cold, too rainy,
too snowy.
I don't let any of thosereasons be a reason why I don't
go and do this exercise that Iknow I need to do.
(43:06):
And the reason why is because Ihave created such a habit that
it's not even based on mymotivation for the day.
And I would like to get to thatpoint where, every day, I'm
doing something creative,whether I'm painting something,
or whether I'm knitting, ormaybe I'm just sitting at the
computer working on somethingfor SketchUp, maybe creating
(43:28):
some plans, project plans forsomething that I want to do in
the future.
It's still part of mycreativity and I would invite
you, like what I'm trying to dois to make it such a habit that
every day, it's just beingcreative, is just part of what
you do.
And it's hard.
Believe me, it's not easy to doand when I look at my exercise
(43:48):
journey, it took me.
This is 2024.
It took me since, I would say,2021.
So it's been three years thatit took me to get to this point
of having exercise be such ahabit that it's not based on
whether I feel like doing it.
I know that I have to do at abare minimum.
So think of and I'm not justtelling you, but I'm going to
(44:08):
think of this myself what is thebare minimum of creativity that
you could do every single dayso that you feel like you're
honoring this thing that'simportant to you, no matter
what's going on in your life.
There's this part of yourselfthat you're able to create and
that could be, maybe, knitting afew rows If you're a knitter,
(44:28):
it could be, you know, openingup a can of paint.
And I know that there arephysiological things, right,
Going back to this Maslow'shierarchy of needs, there's
physiological things that youmight, Going back to this
Maslow's hierarchy of needs,there's physiological things
that you might have going on.
It's your health that could bereally worrying you and
depressing you.
In the case of my mom, like Isaid, she loves scrapbooking.
Maybe it's a matter of sayingyou know what, every day I'm
(44:50):
going to take out thesescrapbooking materials and maybe
I'm going to cut out one littlescrapbooking thing, and if
that's all I can do today, thenthat's all I can do.
But I want to honor thiscreativity so that it doesn't
get lost in this Maslow'shierarchy of need, and that's
what I'm going to try to do formyself.
And I don't know what thatlooks like.
I don't know what thatcreativity looks like, but
(45:13):
that's our homework and that'syour homework.
How can you honor yourcreativity every single day so
that it doesn't fall by thewayside when life gets in the
way?
So that's what I'm going toleave you with and I would love
to hear from you Are youstruggling with being creative?
Are you in a creative slump,like I feel, like I am?
(45:33):
Are you someone who is going todo this homework and think how
can I honor my creativity everysingle day?
You know, maybe that creativitylet me just put this out here
Maybe all you have in you is topull out a, an adult coloring
book, and color for 20 minutes,30 minutes.
Maybe that's all you have inyou today, but guess what?
(45:55):
It's still sparking thatcreativity inside of you Because
you're coloring in the lines.
You're seeing this, this inkpen, stroking the, the page, and
it's feeling very therapeuticand the color is inspiring you
like that is creativity.
So let's think of some ways, andI want to hear what they are.
Let's think of some ways thatwe can start bringing more
(46:16):
creativity into our life.
It could be working on a puzzleand I want to hear what they
are.
Let's think of some ways thatwe can start bringing more
creativity into our life.
It could be working on a puzzle.
So I want to hear from you,serena, at thriftdivingcom.
Email me or hit me up onthriftdivingcom.
You can leave a comment or youcan go to Instagram and look me
up there at thrift diving andlet's talk about how we're going
(46:40):
to honor our creativity everysingle day so that we can find
this joy in us and we cancontinue to honor that and not
get stuck.
All right, I hope you enjoyedthis episode because I enjoyed
recording it for you.
Please come back again and alsopay attention to my YouTube
channel this week, becauseyou're going to get to see
Hykema's bedroom makeover.
You're going to get to see theconsole table that I built with
BJ either this week or next week.
And, yeah, I'm always going tohave something going on for you,
(47:02):
because you know I lovecreativity, even if I'm not
feeling creative in my ownprojects.
Helping other people is whatI'm here to do and I can't wait
to share those projects with you.
All right, I will see you nextepisode.
Hey, hey, thrift diving, findit ugly, make it pretty.
(47:24):
Hey, hey, paint that with tools.
All right, saving money withthose thrift or vibes yeah,
Sometimes you just have to give yourself some grace.
I think we hold ourselves toreally high standards of
productivity, right?
We know that we're a creativeperson, so I should be working
on this.
Regardless of the fact that youmight have just lost your job
and maybe you're about to loseyour home, maybe you're
(00:21):
struggling to figure out wherethe next paycheck is coming from
, the last thing that you'regoing to do is sit down with a
piece of furniture and startpainting Like it just doesn't.
It doesn't make sense.
So we have to give ourselvesgrace for where we are in our
life and the things that we'redealing with, and letting
ourselves know that, okay, I'mstill a creative person.
(00:41):
I'm just focused on some otherthings these fires that need to
be put out.
We're gonna make it look flywith some DIY.
We're gonna make it look flywith some DIY.
We're gonna make it look flywith some DIY.
Uh-oh, thrift diving.
Hey, what's up?
It's Serena Pia fromthriftdivingcom, which is a
(01:02):
do-it-yourself blog, youtubechannel and podcast that helps
you decorate, improve andmaintain your home with paint,
power tools and thrift storeswithout sacrificing your budget,
the environment or style.
Welcome to episode 147 of theThrift Diving Podcast, and I
realize it has been an entiremonth and a half since I've
(01:23):
posted an episode.
What is going on?
Well, I will tell you that Iwas inspired tonight to do an
episode about creativity becauseI realized something so
important and I'm going to tellyou all about that story and
what happened with my friend andwhy I felt so compelled to get
(01:43):
back to podcasting.
I know I didn't tell you that Iwas even taking a break, but I
took a break and I was notfeeling very creative and so in
this episode I'm going to dig inand tell you the stories of why
creativity just sort ofdisappears and what is it that's
causing you to be in a creativeslump.
(02:04):
If you're feeling in a creativeslump like I am, what is the
cause of that and how do we getout of it?
So welcome back to the podcast.
I was like I just need to do anepisode because I was so
inspired and let me just kind ofshare with you where I've been
in the last few months andwhat's been going on.
So if you follow my blog,you'll know that my son had left
(02:26):
for college back in July.
He did a summer program, a sixweek summer program, and I was
all in my feels about that.
So, dealing with that and thenjust a lot of personal things
going on.
Now, even though I have all ofthat going on, I still have been
working on some projects behindthe scenes, but they have been
taking so long because they'renot projects that are directly
(02:49):
in my control.
These are projects that I'lltell you about them in just a
moment, but these are projectsthat I've been doing with other
people Because you know, ifyou've been following thrift
diving for any length of time,you'll know that all of my
projects, for the most up untilthis year, have been in my own
home, and so when I'm doing myown projects, I have control
over when it gets done.
(03:10):
If I'm delayed, you know whatmaterials I'm using.
All of that is under mydiscretion.
Well, these last two projects,or these most recent projects, I
should say these are projectsthat I have been doing with
other people and other people'shomes, and when you work with
someone in that capacity, youdon't really have that much
(03:30):
control.
You've you're coordinatingschedules and you know you're
having to travel and it's just alot more work.
So let's talk about what's beengoing on and why I've not been
feeling creative, and I want youto let me know.
Send me an email, because Ineed to know are you feeling
this creative slump like I am?
I've been in a creative slump,even though I've been working on
(03:52):
projects with other people.
I've not been feeling thisdrive to create, and I think I
have some answers as for why ithappens, and I want you to think
about your own life and we'regoing to talk about, I think,
the psychology behind it andwhere we can maybe try to start
pulling ourselves out of thiscreative slump.
(04:14):
So the first project that I'vebeen working on is the bedroom
makeover of my friend who, ifyou remember, back in January I
was doing a bathroom makeoverwith her.
This was for bathroom week, soI don't know if you caught this
on my YouTube channel.
I will leave links down below.
But we completely gutted whysay gutted?
It feels like we got it Hervery small bathroom.
(04:35):
This was the first project thatI'd ever done in somebody
else's home.
She's been my best friend forabout 15 years and the makeover
was amazing.
She didn't think that we wereeven going to be able to turn
this bathroom into a completelynew looking bathroom with just
refinishing things.
We've finished her tub.
We were finished the tilesurrounding her tub, we did the
(04:58):
floors, we painted, and I had areally great friend who donated
a I believe it was a granitecountertop so that we could
replace the sink, and all ofthat.
So the bathroom came outfantastic.
Well, if you remember that video, at the very end she's like
Serena, I think I'm ready towork on my bedroom.
And I said, okay, I promise youwe're going to work on your
(05:19):
bedroom.
Well, we started her bedroom inJune and here to September and
we are just getting done herbedroom.
I kid you not, we started inJune and it wasn't just her and
I, it was actually her friend,who is an attorney but who also
decided later she wanted tostudy interior design.
So when she realized, oh, wedid her bathroom, well, if you
(05:42):
do another project, I want to beinvited as part of that project
.
And so we drew her into thisbedroom makeover and it's been
all three of us trying torecreate this really cozy space,
that eclectic, cozy space thatmy friend Hykema is her name
wanted to create.
So we've been working on thatand because we don't have much
(06:04):
time during the week, we've beenkind of doing it during
weekends and it's.
It's taken a really long time.
Now don't let that timelinescare you.
It should not take that long todo a bedroom makeover.
If you were in your own houseand doing a bedroom makeover, at
the maximum it probably wouldtake you four to six weeks,
depending on what you're doingin there.
Now, we were not likecompletely building new built-in
(06:30):
bookcases or anything like that, but there was just a lot of
work that had to get done and wehad limited amount of time.
So that's one project that I'vebeen working on.
The other project that I've beenworking on is building a
console table with my friend, bj, who is he knows his way around
tools, so it wasn't likeworking with Hikima.
Hikima has been a completenewbie.
When we did her bathroom, shehad never even painted a wall
(06:52):
before.
So this was kind of a coolproject because BJ wanted to
build a console table for hiswife.
He had the insight of okay, Ithink I know how I want to
design this and I know whatparts need to come together, but
, serena, I need your insight.
Like, I think I know how I wantto design this and I know what
parts need to come together, but, serena, I need your insight,
like I don't quite know if I'mgoing to be on the right path, I
think I'm going to have to usea jigsaw.
(07:14):
I don't really know how to usea jigsaw, but I can use a table
saw.
So his experience level was alittle bit higher.
Now his wife wanted this consoletable because she went to
HomeGoods one day.
She saw this console table.
That was I don't know how, itwas modern, but it was just kind
of like a 1970s, looking kindof cool with arches console
table.
And she said, well, hey, I'mgoing to buy this, it's $400.
(07:38):
And he said, no, no, no, no,don't buy that baby, I can make
that for you.
So he made this grandiosepromise and you know, with his
engineering background, he feltlike you know what?
I can sketch this up, I can dothis.
And then that's when he calledme in to kind of help him.
We didn't envision that this wasgoing to be a project where,
okay, I'm going to bring mycamera, we're going to record it
(08:00):
, we're going to paint it, we'regoing to top coat it.
He just thought I was going tocome in and just kind of give
him some pointers.
Or hey, here's how you use thejigsaw to do the arches.
It turned into a whole quoteunquote production and it was
the most fun project I mean.
There we are building thisthing, trying to piecemeal it
together, right?
He had sketched out all theparts based on the pictures that
(08:22):
his wife took from HomeGoods,and he had a general idea of how
it was going to be built.
So we went to Home Depot, wegot all the materials and then I
showed up at his house one dayand his wife's like oh, oh, wait
, you're going to help him build.
Great, because he wants me to.
Like hold this, do that.
I'm not trying to do any ofthat.
So you guys have at it and letme know how it goes.
(08:45):
So we took, I guess, probablythe last month really.
But again, it's one of thoseprojects where you're working on
something in someone else'shouse, so you're not
consistently every day, you know, chipping away at it.
So we had to kind of plan outwhen he was going to be working
from home, when I could come andhelp him and all the parts and
(09:05):
pieces.
But that project looks amazingand we just finished that.
So that was something that wascreative and I did feel like I
was tapping into my creativity alittle bit, but when it came to
my own projects, I couldn'treally muster up the creativity
to move forward with doing myown stuff.
(09:25):
After I did the workbench in myshe shed which you should see
that on my YouTube channel Ididn't really feel like there
was anything that I personallywanted to work on other than,
okay, we started the bedroommakeover, great, we're painting,
we're putting some pictures upon the walls, you know,
fantastic.
But again, those were far andfew between because we're
(09:47):
coordinating schedules.
So all that time in between Ididn't feel like I wanted to
work on anything in my own house.
I didn't feel like I wanted tobuild anything.
I've got a really nice vintagedresser that I moved into my she
shed probably about a month agoand it's just been sitting
there.
I've not wanted to strip it, Iwas not sure if I wanted to
paint it and it's just beensitting there and the creative
(10:09):
spark was just wah, wah, wah.
So, anyway, let me tell you howI came to this podcast episode,
and this is why I like havingpodcast episodes that are kind
of on the fly, because it'ssomething that I'm mulling
around in my brain or somethingthat happens that just sparks me
.
Trust me, this is not howpodcasting is supposed to go.
You're supposed to have aneditorial calendar with maybe
(10:33):
interviews lined up.
You're supposed to have aschedule.
It's not about whether you'reinspired to do it, you just sit
down and you do it.
You work by your schedule.
But with this podcast, I reallyhave not operated that way.
It's really just kind of beenhey, I have this idea or this
thing that happened that I justhave to talk to you about
because it sparks somethinginside of me.
(10:54):
Anyway, that is how it happenedtonight.
So I go to my friend's house,hakima we're just finishing up
this bedroom makeover.
But before I get to her house,we're talking on the phone this
afternoon and she says thecurtain rods came and I got this
piece of artwork and that pieceof artwork and you know we're
ready to hang these curtains.
And and I said Well, I've gotsomething that I'm going to
bring over to you, some pillowsthat some brand had sponsored.
(11:16):
And she said Well, I got asurprise for you.
Well, she didn't really say asurprise for me, but she said
she had a surprise.
And I'm like what is it?
She didn't want to tell me.
And I said to her.
Well, I've got a surprise foryou.
She's like what?
Okay?
So what my surprise was is thatI am currently working on a
video with a heat press.
(11:38):
So there's a company that sentme this really cool heat press.
It's a whole kit like an eightin one heat press.
Really cool heat press.
It's a whole kit like an eightin one heat press.
And I was making some t shirtsand basically it's just just
sort of like an unboxing kind ofvideo and I really like it.
It has a.
You know, I have a Cricut.
I do have the Cricut heatpresses that you hold by, you
know, by your hand.
(11:58):
It's got the timer and all thatand they work great.
But I was really curious aboutmaybe a more professional heat
press.
So the company sent it to me.
I was making some t shirts andI thought I don't really want to
just post t shirts on myYouTube channel, like that's
kind of boring.
I would like to make a pillow.
Well, we're doing this bedroommakeover.
I could make a pillow forHykema.
So I went to the craft store,bought some materials and, if
(12:23):
you remember her bathroommakeover, we had created some
cricket art for the wall and itwas a picture of like a
silhouette of black, of a blackwoman with an afro, and she's
kind of smiling and she's gotthese beautiful bright pink lips
.
This is what Hikima and I hadpicked out and we thought it was
a great pop of color for herbathroom.
So I decided, okay, well, Iknow that she likes that image.
(12:46):
Why don't I do that same imageon a pillow?
And the fabric that I boughtwas like a denim type fabric,
because I know she likes denim,and it was like a black denim, a
faded black denim, and I'mgoing to take some glitter iron
on and I'll do that same imageon a pillow and we'll do that as
part of, you know, thedemonstration for this heat
(13:08):
press Plus it.
You know, you kill two birdswith one stone.
You're making a pillow testingout this heat press and I'm also
making a pillow for her room.
So I went there tonight withthis pillow in a bag and I was
just kind of hiding it behind,you know, the wall and I didn't
want to show her what mysurprise was.
Well, do you know what hersurprise was?
Her surprise was that she hadthis easel set up in her bedroom
(13:30):
.
Now again, her bedroom makeoveris not completely done, but she
had this easel set up with apiece of art that she was
painting.
Now let me tell you how amazingthis is, because my friend
Hakima I've known her for 15years I have never, ever heard
of her creating art.
(13:50):
I've never heard her talk aboutwanting to paint.
I've never heard that she hadcreated artwork and painted in
the past.
It was a part of ourrelationship that we had never
talked about, even though sheknew hey, I'm thrift diving, I'm
creating art and I'm painting,I'm doing all this.
She's never said hey, by theway, serena, I'm creative.
(14:12):
And so when I walked into theroom and I saw this cool piece
of art and she was inspired bythis artist.
I cannot think of his name, Iwill have to find it and leave
it down in the show notes, butit's a.
It's a black artist who haddied at 27 of a cocaine overdose
.
Some of you may know, I think,john Batista or something like
that.
I will find the exact name andput it down below.
(14:33):
She was inspired by his artworkand so she created kind of like
a rendition of of what he wouldhave created.
And it was so cool.
I first of all, not only did.
It look good and the colorswere great.
But the fact that my friend,who I have known for 15 years,
felt inspired enough to put upan easel and a canvas and start
(14:57):
painting, I told her.
I said I am so proud of youLike I couldn't stop telling her
I am so proud of you.
It made me feel like a mamabear, who I don't want to say I
led her to be creative.
But this bedroom makeover thatthat her friend and I that all
three of us are doing inspiredher to pull out these paints
(15:18):
that her sister had gotten her,this set of crafting paints
years ago that she had neverused, and she was inspired to
create this artwork for her wall.
I felt so proud of her.
You have to understand thehistory of of Hikima and she and
I are going to get on a podcastepisode episode soon and talk
about her bedroom makeover andall of that.
(15:40):
But if you had caught herprevious interview that we had
done when we were done herbathroom, we talked about it.
She talked about confidenceissues.
She talked about wanting tomake a change in her life so
that she would tell herself.
You know what?
I can do that?
Because for a lot of a lot ofher life.
She just didn't feel confident.
And the crazy thing is that ifyou talk to her, if you engage
(16:03):
with her, you would never thinkthis is a woman that has
confidence issues.
This is a woman who self esteem, you know, has taken a hit all
of her life due to you know allthese different circumstances.
You would never even imaginethat, because you know, normally
when you think about somebodythat has confidence issues or
self esteem issues, a lot oftimes they put themselves down,
(16:23):
don't they?
I'm sure you have somebody inyour life that you talk to that
you know they have confidenceissues and they'll say things
like I'm fat, or I'm just notcreative, or well, I could never
do that.
I don't know if I'm smartenough to do that Like these are
these self deprecating thingsthat we say to ourselves.
She never says those things,but she says them to herself in
(16:44):
her mind.
So before we started her bedroommakeover, we're actually taking
it back further.
Before we started her bathroommakeover, she was telling me
this was at the beginning of theyear, actually a little bit
before that that she wasstarting to change her mindset
(17:05):
and telling herself you knowwhat I can do things.
I can take on that position.
I can take on moreresponsibility at work, being a
project manager.
I can do that.
And so when I had presented toher hey, we've got this bedroom
or bathroom makeover.
Do you want to do it?
Her first thought was, no, Idon't think it's going to work
out Like.
That's what she wanted to sayto me.
But she said you know what,serena, I think I can, I think
we can do this, let's do it.
I'm not feeling confident aboutit, but I'm trying to move in
(17:26):
that direction.
So that's what we did.
We tackled this bathroommakeover and she's just really
took that project by both hornsand was like oh, I'm painting
walls and I'm scraping floorsand I'm doing all this stuff, I
can do this.
And so it built her confidence.
It was this project that addedto her confidence bucket.
(17:48):
She and I talked about this alot, about building your
confidence bucket and doingthings that just adds to that
bucket instead of doing thingsthat take away right.
So then now we're doing thisbedroom makeover.
It's been since June.
We have painted the walls, wepainted the ceilings.
(18:09):
She picked out the colors right.
So there wasn't a lot of designfrom my endpoint, but I was the
one that was kind of leading it.
Well, we were all leading itreally I don't want to take
credit for that but we were allcoordinating this.
It really I don't want to takecredit for that, but we were all
coordinating this and shereally started to unleash more
of this creativity that she hadlocked inside of her for years
that I had never even witnessed.
And so when she showed me thiseasel with this painting that
(18:30):
she's working on, I was so proudof her and I had to.
I had to ask her well, wheredid this come from?
So she told me that she waswatching some it must have been
like an HGTV type show, andthere was a woman on there I
think it was a realtor who wasat some point talking about how
she used to paint or something,and Hikima was inspired by this.
(18:51):
She's like oh wait, a minute, Iused to paint, I'm going to get
some canvases, I'm going topull out the paints, I'm going
to work on this painting andit's going to be part of the
gallery wall that we're puttingover my bed.
So we're done.
We're about halfway done thegallery wall.
We didn't finish that part yet,but listening to this woman talk
about how she used to paint.
There was something that justsnapped inside of her that was
(19:13):
like I'm going to start paintingagain.
And she pulled out all thesematerials and she just started
painting.
So when I walked into herbedroom tonight and I saw that,
I was like are you kidding me?
I am so proud of you.
Where did this creativity comefrom?
And then she told me about thisand I said to her I said,
hakima, I want you to understandsomething you know.
(19:33):
Yes, you were inspired by thisepisode.
I want you to think about howyou got to this point.
It was that bathroom makeoverthat started unlocking this
creativity inside of you,building this confidence inside
of you.
And then, from there, we wentto your bedroom makeover.
Right, we painted the walls,you're looking at artwork,
(19:54):
you're creating this cozy spacefor yourself that you've always
wanted.
Now, if you were to see thebefore picture and you will see
the before pictures of Hakima'sbedroom you will understand that
in that space, in her bedroom,the way it was, there was no way
that she could have gotten tothis point of expressing this
creativity.
There was no way.
First of all, there was nospace, and when she was
(20:17):
surrounded by I don't even knowthe right word.
I don't even want to sayclutter, but I guess it was
clutter.
When she was surrounded by this, it was hard for her to unlock
that creativity.
Right, the project that we didin her bathroom started to
unlock it.
But I feel like if we had notgotten to her bedroom, that
(20:38):
creativity would not have evenbeen unlocked and I felt proud
of her.
But I felt like, oh my gosh,this is a real life example of
me helping somebody discoverthat creativity.
And even as I talk about itright now, I have goosebumps.
I'm not kidding you.
I wish that.
I wish I was actually recordingvideo, but I'm sitting here in
(20:59):
my pajamas.
My hair looks crazy.
There's no way you can catch meon camera looking like this.
But just imagine if you couldsee me.
I have these goosebumps on myarm, because this is my life's
purpose, right Create, inspireand teach.
And seeing somebody who, for thelast 15 years that I have known
her, her house has remained thesame.
She's always talked aboutthings she's wanted to do in her
(21:21):
house, but she didn't have theability to move that forward.
And I was able to move thatforward with her bathroom
makeover and then her friend andI were able to bring that with
her on this journey of creatingthis cozy, beautiful space.
Her bedroom looks amazing.
We're not done yet.
I mean we still have to put thenew bed on the new.
(21:42):
She's keeping the same bed, butwe still have to put the new
mattress.
We've got sheets coming.
She just got her new comforterin the mail that she ordered.
So the bedding and all thatstuff, all the little fine
pieces, haven't been added, butthey're there, they're ready to
go and we're going to finish itup this week.
(22:03):
But I was so inspired by thatthat it got me thinking about
creativity and I'm like I got torecord an episode on this and
that's how I ended up here,because you know, there's a lot
of times when you know I'mthinking about, oh, I should do
a podcast episode, and then Ithink to myself I'm not really
inspired, like what is it that Iwant to talk about?
And it got me thinking aboutsomething that I've been having
(22:25):
offline discussions about,something called Maslow's
hierarchy of needs.
Now, if you are interested inpsychology, if you were a
psychology major, maybe you tookpsych 101 when you were in
college or psych 100.
This wouldn't be newinformation, right?
But I've been pointing this outto a lot of people lately and I
feel like this is the frameworkfor how we get stuck in our
(22:49):
creativity.
I believe there's like fivedifferent levels At the bottom
of this triangle.
The idea is that you have tohave your most basic needs met
before you can even think aboutanything else.
That comes higher on thattriangle, and it's true, right?
So the basic foundation of thisMaslow's hierarchy of needs,
this triangle, is yourphysiological needs, and part of
(23:12):
your physiological needs arethe things like breathing and
food, water, shelter, clothing,sleep, like.
If you don't have these basicneeds met, you can't think about
anything else as part of thistriangle, right?
So let's go through thedifferent sections so that you
know what they are.
So again, these are yourphysiological needs.
That makes up the base.
(23:34):
It kind of looks like a foodpyramid, right?
So you think about the foodpyramid.
And what did they always teachyou in school?
Well, your carbohydrates, yourbreads, pastas.
That kind of makes up thebottom.
Well, for the Maslow's hierarchyof needs, it's the
physiological needs, and then,above that is your safety and
security.
That's your health, it's yourjob, your employment, your
(23:56):
property, your home, your family, but that's your safety and
security, your health, youremployment, your property, your
family, where you fit in withyour friends, and all of that.
And then the next level up islove and belonging, and so
that's your friendships, yourfamily, your intimacy and your
sense of connection with otherpeople, with the world.
And then the next level up isyour self-esteem so we talked
(24:20):
about that with Hikima.
That's your confidence, yourachievement, your need to be a
unique individual and, they say,like, your respect of others.
And then self-actualization isat the very tip of this pyramid,
and so the things that theyhave listed there in the
Maslow's hierarchy of needs isyour morality, your creativity
(24:42):
there's that word yourspontaneity, your sense of
purpose and meaning and innerpotential and all that self
actualization.
So the idea is that you needall of these other things met
before you can actually getself-actualization, which is the
creativity and the purpose andmeaning and all of that good
(25:03):
stuff.
So let's think about Hikima'sexample.
Right, when I look at this, Ithink about those conversations
that she and I had aboutself-esteem early on, before we
even did the bathroom project.
We talked about her confidencelevel being low and how she was
changing her mindset in order tostart feeling more confidence
and doing things that fill herconfidence bucket friendship,
(25:26):
family intimacy, sense ofconnection by us working on
these projects together.
You have no idea how muchconnection that Hakeem and I
created with doing these twoprojects her bathroom and then
her bedroom.
She and I, I told you, we'vebeen friends for 15 years.
She is like my sister fromanother mister right, as the
(25:46):
saying goes, but over the lastnumber of years I think we had
kind of fallen off a bit.
There wasn't any one particularthing.
It's just life gets busy andyou start losing connection.
You go out every now and then,but you're not really hanging
out.
We all have those friendshipsthat, for whatever reason, start
to kind of fade away a littlebit.
Well, these projects reallybrought us together.
(26:09):
The amount of time it takes topaint walls.
You're doing.
You know this is like a weekendproject and then you're sending
text messages back and forth,talking on the doing.
You know this is like a weekendproject and then you're sending
text messages back and forth,talking on the phone, talking
about okay, well, what do weneed to buy?
What bedding did you get?
You're creating this sense ofconnection and that's what those
projects did for her and I.
It really brought us backtogether in a way that I don't
(26:31):
know if we would have come backtogether so closely if it hadn't
been for these two projects.
But when you look at hercreativity, how did she get to
that point of being able to workon that painting, to start to
feel like you know what I can, Ican do that.
I can get back into painting,because I used to do that when I
(26:51):
was younger.
All of these things were met forher her physiological needs,
right.
She's got food, water, herhealth and safety and we'll talk
about this in some upcomingepisodes.
Hikima has had some scares,having to do biopsies and all of
that.
She's a breast cancer survivorand I believe she had been
(27:16):
diagnosed in 2018.
She's been in good health, butthis has been a tough year for
her and we're going to talkabout that.
I'm going to invite her ontothe podcast for October, which
is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
I know it's not anythingrelated to thrift diving.
I love talking about health.
I love talking about being thebest that you can be so that,
once your health is taken careof and you feel good about your
health, you can be creative.
Again, it's this wholehierarchy of needs, with her
(27:37):
going through some of the thingsthat she went through this year
with going to do biopsies andthat fear.
But once she realized, oh, I'mokay, that was checked off.
And then again, as I mentioned,the friendship that we had
rediscovered and the sense ofconnection and then her building
her confidence.
That is how she got to hercreative space.
(27:58):
If you are somebody who isdealing with any number of these
issues, you're not going to beable to be creative.
It's not going to be there foryou.
And this is what I've beengoing through.
My health is okay, but I feellike I'm kind of stuck in the
middle of this pyramid, thisMaslow's hierarchy of need, with
love and belonging, you know,friendship.
(28:20):
I've had some family issuesgoing on.
You know there's some intimacyissues going on, a sense of
connection issues, and so I'venot really been able to move up
this pyramid over the lastcouple of months, and so that's
why I've been feeling so stuck.
That's why you haven't seen anyvideos from me, because I am
(28:40):
not really in that mood tocreate, even though I have been
working on these two projects.
I don't feel that sense of likejoy of creating, because I'm
stuck further down this Maslow'shierarchy of needs.
I feel like I'm so focused onall of those other things that I
can't and haven't been able toreally get to that top pyramid.
(29:01):
So that's kind of where I'vebeen.
You know my mom.
She has been dealing withhealth issues and she is someone
who's always loved to scrapbook.
She's been she.
She loves to do puzzles andthose kind of things, but in the
last year, I mean, her healthhas really taken a hit.
So her physiological needs, hersafety and security, these are
(29:23):
threatened.
And so if you are somebody whois dealing with these kind of
issues, how do you be creative?
How do you get back to beingable to enjoy scrapbooking For
me?
How do I get back to feelingcontent, being in my shed
painting furniture by myself?
I feel like for this year andactually if you remember me
(29:45):
talking about goals and stufflast year, at the beginning of
2023, one of the importantthings that I had said for
myself was the three themes thatI was focusing on was
connection, flow and simplicity.
Themes that I was focusing onwas connection, flow and
simplicity.
Those were the three themes andI think the one that took the I
(30:06):
would say the precedence wasconnection.
I have enjoyed connecting withmy friends, connecting with
people that I love, connectingwith family, and I think that
has taken a lot of my time.
The connection that I've beenbuilding with other people of my
time, the connection that I'vebeen building with other people
and sometimes being in my shedworking by myself and listening
to the Golden Girls, because youknow I love the Golden Girls,
(30:30):
right, you know I love theGolden Girls and I will tell you
also love Family Matters withSteve Urkel.
It's one of those shows thatyou can just put on in the
background and it just feelscozy because you know the
episode, you know what they'regoing to say.
I've watched it a million timesand I will turn on these shows
and just enjoy creating bymyself.
Well, because I'm so focused oncreating connections with people
, I find myself less and lesswanting to work by myself in my
(30:55):
shed and it's hard to admit thatbecause I'm someone that's
always been very well.
I know it's hard to believethis, but I consider myself to
be a extroverted introvert.
I love interacting with people.
I can do it on a stage, I cando it behind a video camera, I
can do it in person.
But if I have too muchinteraction I need that time to
(31:18):
just just breathe and justregroup and get re-energized.
But I find myself lately justwanting to be with other people
and talk to other people andconnect with them.
Even when I'm in like publicand I'm walking, or if I'm
running or going to a store, Iget so much energy out of just
(31:38):
even having an interaction witha stranger.
It just makes me happy andthere's science behind that.
So it's not just me.
Are you somebody?
That's like that too?
My kids they think I'm weird,they're like oh, why are you
talking to that person?
And I say to them because itmakes me feel good, I smile, I
like connecting with people andso, if you notice this theme
(31:59):
that's really taking precedencein my life it's working on the
bedroom makeover with Hikima,it's working with my friend BJ
on building the console table.
I find myself gravitatingtowards projects that allow me
to connect with other people anddo different things but have
that sense of connection.
And so that's the times when Ifeel most creative and happy is
(32:21):
when I'm working with otherpeople.
Working by myself, it feels itjust feels a little lonely and I
think because I'm so focused onconnection and intimacy and
just having that sense ofcommunity that I'm really
gravitating towards thoseprojects.
But then my own individualprojects.
I'm like do I really want to beworking with my headphones on
(32:42):
listening to Dateline podcast,which is what I did and how I
got through the?
You know, the three months ittook took me to wire my entire
she shed.
That was a very lonesomeproject.
I was not lonely, but to thinkof doing that right now I don't
know if I want to work on thosekind of projects.
I want to work with otherpeople and I feel like, even as
(33:04):
I'm saying this, I'm feelinglike that is my truth.
I want that connection.
I want to do projects that aregoing to improve other people's
lives, because seeing how Hykemahas really kind of moved up
that hierarchy of needs andbeing this confident woman and
loving the space that she's inthis oasis that she's building
(33:25):
for herself, that feels reallygood for me and it feels like
I'm actually honoring what mylife's purpose is to help people
create and inspiring them to dothat.
So that's kind of what I'mgoing through and in this
episode I didn't want to justtalk about why I think
creativity can end up in thetoilet.
I also wanted to talk about somestrategies, things that I'm
(33:47):
currently using, things that I'mtrying to use myself or
planning to use.
So let's talk about the firstone.
I think the first suggestionthat I have for you and this is
what I'm trying to keep in mindfor myself is that sometimes you
just have to give yourself somegrace.
I think we hold ourselves toreally high standards of
(34:08):
productivity, right?
We know that we're a creativeperson, so I should be working
on this.
Regardless of the fact that youmight have just lost your job
and maybe you're about to loseyour home, maybe you're
struggling to figure out wherethe next paycheck is coming from
, the last thing that you'regoing to do is sit down with a
piece of furniture and startpainting Like it just doesn't.
(34:30):
It doesn't make sense.
So we have to give ourselvesgrace for where we are in our
life and the things that we'redealing with, and letting
ourselves know that, okay, I'mstill a creative person.
I'm just focused on some otherthings, these fires that need to
be put out.
Another suggestion that may ormay not work for you is to try
(34:51):
journaling.
I have to admit I love, love,love writing.
I can sit down at my computerand I can journal for a good two
hours.
I tell you that because I'vedone it.
There are days when I'm mullingover.
Well, this happened.
What do I think about that?
How do I feel about this?
It's like my journal is my ownpersonal therapist, right, like
(35:14):
I am my own personal therapistand I get it all out on the
pages.
And you may or may not besomeone who's as prolific with
words.
I did suggest this to a friendrecently who's going through
some issues and he's like, yeah,I'm not gonna do that.
I don't like to write, I'm notgood at it, and I think if
that's you, then why don't youtry suggestion number three,
(35:38):
which is well, you could talk tosomeone, right, you could try
therapy, and I just recently hadI don't know.
It seems like all the peoplethat are in my life right now.
They are very pro-therapy.
Not that I've ever beenanti-therapy, but I love the
idea of talking to someone whois a professional who can give
you some feedback and insight.
Probably in the spring I hadtried, you know, reaching out
(35:58):
with a therapist and I tried afew sessions.
Didn't really care for him toomuch Because of some of the
suggestions he gave me, I didn'tlike it.
I was like I'm gonna findsomebody else and I have not
been able to find somebody else.
But if you're somebody whofeels like you need someone to
talk to, journaling just isn'tcutting it for you.
You're not a writer, you don'thave the insight.
You really need someprofessional help.
(36:19):
Therapy is always an option youcan go to.
I believe the site that peoplehave recommended to me is
psychologytodaycom, and theyhave tons of psychologists,
therapists on there.
I believe they've gotpsychiatrists as well and you
can just email them and see ifthey accept your insurance.
So definitely look into that.
(36:40):
But you know, if you're like Idon't think I want to do therapy
, I think I just need to talk tofriends, I can tell you that I
have been sending so manymessages back and forth with my
friend Nakia.
She and I met about, I want tosay, eight years ago.
She's also into thrifting andthrift diving and all of that
stuff, and so that's how we met.
She was in the creative spaceof thrift diving and she was a
(37:05):
content creator, and so weconnected.
We kind of fell off for a while, but in the last few months, oh
my gosh, we have been sendingmessages back and forth, audio
messages.
We don't even talk on the phone.
We will send like 10 minutemessages and triples have full
conversations with each otherthat we're just listening to as
(37:25):
we clean or as we're on the go.
Or, you know, as I said in myshe shed working on a project or
something, I will send messagesto her.
So you know, you have to findthat person that you can open up
, to find that person who willlisten to you so that you can
express yourself and kind ofwork through that.
It is kind of like therapy, butit's a release, and so I would
(37:46):
tell you to find that personthat you can talk to, like I
have.
Also, too, there's another appthat I like, aside from just
sending audio messages through.
You know, your messengerservice is to try Marco Polo, so
that's a video messaging app.
I love it.
It's a really great way to keepin contact with friends, but
(38:08):
it's so convenient because youcan just listen when it's
convenient.
You can send messages when it'sconvenient.
And back to the audio messages.
My mom, she you know I won'tget into all of the discussion
on that, but she's alone for alot of a lot of the day, and so
I even got her started on audiomessages so that she has a way
to keep in contact with me.
(38:28):
That makes her feel like she'sgot someone there with her
during the day.
So you know, that is reallyimportant.
And another idea, like Imentioned with Hikima and BJ, do
a project with a friend, if youlike being creative, but you
know you're kind of missing outon that connection then suggest
a room makeover with a friend,or find a project that you can
(38:51):
paint together or that you canbuild together can build
together, and it's somethingshared that you can do together.
And so now you've got somethingthat you're focused on outside
of all the other issues that youhave going on.
Another strategy is trying adifferent hobby.
You know it could be thatyou're just bored with the
hobbies that you know how to do,but there's something about
(39:12):
learning something new thatgives you this spark of joy, of
wonder, because now there's thisthing that you want to learn
how to do and you're researchingit and you're excited about
this new thing.
It probably releases dopamine,right, and that's what makes us
happy, that's what allows us tofeel good, and when you start
(39:34):
something new, when you'retrying a new hobby, there's that
rush of dopamine.
I know that there is because Ifeel it when I try something new
, and I'll tell you aboutsomething new that I tried
recently that I had no idea wasas cool as it is.
I went golfing for the firsttime.
Yes, I went on a nine-holecourse and did golfing with my
(39:55):
friend BJ.
So remember the console tablethat he and I just finished up.
We were applying the top coatone day and it needed to dry
anyway.
So I said, okay, well, we'redone, let's go and do golf.
We had gone to the drivingrange twice, so I felt confident
in knowing how to swing a golfclub.
Now would I be able totranslate that to a golf course
(40:19):
to do nine holes?
Let me tell you, the weatherwas perfect.
I guess you could say I didn'tdo very well, right, like if it
was a par four.
I was like par eight, par nine.
So I didn't really do all thatgreat before.
A complete newbie, a completebeginner.
I did pretty good and I feltreally excited over the prospect
(40:39):
of hey, I can get some golfclubs, or maybe not even a whole
set, I can buy something new.
So I'm not investing too muchmoney into this new thing, that
I don't really know how muchtime I'm going to have to invest
in it, but it felt reallyexciting to try something
different and that helped.
I think that helped to kind ofspark me a little bit and I
(40:59):
don't know about sparking mycreativity, but it was because I
don't know if you would call ita creative hobby I guess
probably some people do but itwas something interesting,
something new that I tried.
So if you're kind of bored withsome of the hobbies that you're
used to doing, try something new.
Pick up a new sport, mayberesearch how to do some knitting
(41:19):
, or something that you didn'tthink could be as cool as it was
.
I'll tell you, I had thoughtthat golfing was just something
that old men did.
I had no idea that there are somany young people that are
golfing and it's just, it's kindof cool being introduced to a
whole new world of somethingthat you you just didn't even
(41:39):
know.
So maybe that's what you needis to just try something
different.
Try a new hobby, try a newsport, go to a different place
and see how other people arespending their time doing this
thing that you thought you knew,but you really had no idea.
And the last thing is try not tobe motivated by feeling.
You know, a lot of times wedon't do things because, well, I
(42:03):
just don't feel like it.
I don't feel like exercising,so I'm not going to go today.
I don't feel like beingcreative, so I'm not going to
pull out that piece of furnitureor that paintbrush.
I don't feel like cutting thatwood, so I'm just not going to
start that project.
And when we operate on how wefeel, there's a lot of
opportunity that we waste.
(42:24):
And I would say and this is whatI struggle with as well try to
build a habit of the thing thatyou want to commit to.
So for me, exercising is ahabit, at the very least.
I know that I've got to go fora three mile walk every day.
If I don't walk that day, thenmaybe I'll run.
If I don't run, then I've gotto lift weights.
(42:45):
I've got to do something,because that's the habit that I
established for myself.
So it's not a matter of I don'treally feel like walking today,
or the weather is just it's toohot, it's too cold, too rainy,
too snowy.
I don't let any of thosereasons be a reason why I don't
go and do this exercise that Iknow I need to do.
(43:06):
And the reason why is because Ihave created such a habit that
it's not even based on mymotivation for the day.
And I would like to get to thatpoint where, every day, I'm
doing something creative,whether I'm painting something,
or whether I'm knitting, ormaybe I'm just sitting at the
computer working on somethingfor SketchUp, maybe creating
(43:28):
some plans, project plans forsomething that I want to do in
the future.
It's still part of mycreativity and I would invite
you, like what I'm trying to dois to make it such a habit that
every day, it's just beingcreative, is just part of what
you do.
And it's hard.
Believe me, it's not easy to doand when I look at my exercise
(43:48):
journey, it took me.
This is 2024.
It took me since, I would say,2021.
So it's been three years thatit took me to get to this point
of having exercise be such ahabit that it's not based on
whether I feel like doing it.
I know that I have to do at abare minimum.
So think of and I'm not justtelling you, but I'm going to
(44:08):
think of this myself what is thebare minimum of creativity that
you could do every single dayso that you feel like you're
honoring this thing that'simportant to you, no matter
what's going on in your life.
There's this part of yourselfthat you're able to create and
that could be, maybe, knitting afew rows If you're a knitter,
(44:28):
it could be, you know, openingup a can of paint.
And I know that there arephysiological things, right,
Going back to this Maslow'shierarchy of needs, there's
physiological things that youmight, Going back to this
Maslow's hierarchy of needs,there's physiological things
that you might have going on.
It's your health that could bereally worrying you and
depressing you.
In the case of my mom, like Isaid, she loves scrapbooking.
Maybe it's a matter of sayingyou know what, every day I'm
(44:50):
going to take out thesescrapbooking materials and maybe
I'm going to cut out one littlescrapbooking thing, and if
that's all I can do today, thenthat's all I can do.
But I want to honor thiscreativity so that it doesn't
get lost in this Maslow'shierarchy of need, and that's
what I'm going to try to do formyself.
And I don't know what thatlooks like.
I don't know what thatcreativity looks like, but
(45:13):
that's our homework and that'syour homework.
How can you honor yourcreativity every single day so
that it doesn't fall by thewayside when life gets in the
way?
So that's what I'm going toleave you with and I would love
to hear from you Are youstruggling with being creative?
Are you in a creative slump,like I feel, like I am?
(45:33):
Are you someone who is going todo this homework and think how
can I honor my creativity everysingle day?
You know, maybe that creativitylet me just put this out here
Maybe all you have in you is topull out a, an adult coloring
book, and color for 20 minutes,30 minutes.
Maybe that's all you have inyou today, but guess what?
(45:55):
It's still sparking thatcreativity inside of you Because
you're coloring in the lines.
You're seeing this, this inkpen, stroking the, the page, and
it's feeling very therapeuticand the color is inspiring you
like that is creativity.
So let's think of some ways, andI want to hear what they are.
Let's think of some ways thatwe can start bringing more
(46:16):
creativity into our life.
It could be working on a puzzleand I want to hear what they
are.
Let's think of some ways thatwe can start bringing more
creativity into our life.
It could be working on a puzzle.
So I want to hear from you,serena, at thriftdivingcom.
Email me or hit me up onthriftdivingcom.
You can leave a comment or youcan go to Instagram and look me
up there at thrift diving andlet's talk about how we're going
(46:40):
to honor our creativity everysingle day so that we can find
this joy in us and we cancontinue to honor that and not
get stuck.
All right, I hope you enjoyedthis episode because I enjoyed
recording it for you.
Please come back again and alsopay attention to my YouTube
channel this week, becauseyou're going to get to see
Hykema's bedroom makeover.
You're going to get to see theconsole table that I built with
BJ either this week or next week.
And, yeah, I'm always going tohave something going on for you,
(47:02):
because you know I lovecreativity, even if I'm not
feeling creative in my ownprojects.
Helping other people is whatI'm here to do and I can't wait
to share those projects with you.
All right, I will see you nextepisode.
Hey, hey, thrift diving, findit ugly, make it pretty.
(47:24):
Hey, hey, paint that with tools.
All right, saving money withthose thrift or vibes yeah,
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