December 23, 2025 • 26 mins
Dan Fabrizi is a real estate entrepreneur and senior living consultant whose career includes leading one of Florida’s largest and most effective COVID care units for 1,200+ seniors. Despite his success, burnout pushed him toward therapy and a personal reinvention that reshaped both his business and his identity.Now, as founder of Burgh2Bay Partners, Dan brings radical honesty and emotional intelligence to conversations about trauma, leadership, and resilience. Passionate about reaching men, entrepreneurs, and young people under constant pressure to perform, he speaks with a candid, unfiltered voice grounded in lived experience.
In This Episode
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In This Episode
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-trauma-therapist--5739761/support.
You can learn more about what I do here:
The Trauma Therapist Newsletter: celebrates the people and voices in the mental health profession. And it's free! Check it out here: https://bit.ly/4jGBeSa
———
If you’d like to support The Trauma Therapist Podcast and the work I do you can do that here with a monthly donation of $5, $7, or $10: Donate to The Trauma Therapist Podcast.
Click here to join my email list and receive podcast updates and other news.
Thank you to our Sponsors:
Incogni - Use code [traumatherapist] and get 60% off annual plans: https://incogni.com/traumatherapist
Jane App - use code GUY1MO at https://jane.app/book_a_demo
Journey Clinical - visit https://join.journeyclinical/trauma for 1 month off your membership
Therapy Wisdom - https://therapywisdom.com/jan/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Trauma Theverors podcast. My name is Guimiferson
and I interview incredible people who share the story of
how trauma has shaped their lives. And a big thank
you for sponsoring today's episode goes to my guest and
our sponsors. SO five four, three, two and one, Our folks,
(00:25):
welcome back to the podcast. Very excited to have as
my guest today, Dan Frebreezy Dan, Welcome.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Thank you, thanks for having me awesome SO.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Dan is a real estate entrepreneur and senior living consultant
whose career include leading one of Florida's largest and most
effective COVID care units for twelve hundred plus seniors. Despite
his success, burnout pushed him toward therapy and a personal
reinvention that reshaped both his business and his identity. Now,
as founder of burg Debate Partners, Dan brings radical honesty
(00:56):
and emotional intelligence to conversations about trauma, leadership, resilience, passionate
about reaching men, entrepreneurs, and young people under constant pressure
to perform. He speaks with a candid, unfiltered voice, grounded
and lived experience. Well, Jesus, that sounds like we need
a lot of need. We need that right now.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Yeah, and I don't know, I don't know that we'll
have enough time to cover all of that, but I
appreciate the introduction.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Thank you of course, of course. All right, so before
we go in here, share with the listeners where you're
from originally and where you are currently.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
So I'm originally from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I was born and
raised diehard sports fan out of Pittsburgh. And actually tomorrow
is my twelve year anniversary of moving to Tampa, Florida.
So I'm now currently in Tampa, Florida, and I've been
there for tomorrow will be twelve years.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
All right, awesome, So very interesting bio. How did this start?
When I say this, I mean this kind of reinvention
if you will, burnout invention. Yeah, really interesting.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
You know, it's it's funny.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
I feel like I've reinvented myself four times in my life.
And one of the things that wasn't mentioned on the
bio was that I thought my path was going to
be in sports. And I was a co host at
ESPN Radio when I lived in Pittsburgh, and growing up,
I always thought that was going to be, you know,
my ultimate goal to be on the radio. I worked
for the Penguins back in two thousand and eight. I
(02:19):
did a lot of the on ice and in promotion things.
But I had the opportunity to meet the program director
at ESPN, and just through caddying for him at Oakmond
Country Club, he gave me the opportunity to come on
the radio. And you know, me, thinking that was my dream,
was so pumped to do it. And I got about
eight months into and I said, this doesn't feel right,
this doesn't feel like this.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Is the path for me.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
So that was the end of the first you know,
reinvention of myself. And I worked in healthcare for a
bit and then when I moved to Florida, just through
contacts and building relationships, kind of started at the bottom
of senior living and worked my way up to being
a senior vice president of a company. And that came
after running the COVID unit where we took care of
a ton of people and made a ton of great
(03:02):
relationships with all the local hospitals, and you know, we
started to buy up new communities. We started to create
a management company and an ownership group, and like I said,
I got up to senior vice president of the company,
making great money, probably more money than I ever thought
I would make, but again, it didn't feel like that
was my purpose.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
And hold on a second, why why didn't it feel
like it?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
I think what really turned in me was, I think
when I ran that COVID unit and there was so
much pressure to do well, and when I did well,
that made me think, Okay, maybe I do have the
capabilities of doing my own things, starting my own business,
carving my own path. And you know, it was a
tough part because I was doing well and progressing through
my career and making great money, but it still didn't
(03:45):
feel like it was enough. It didn't feel like it
was my path. So I went back to the drawing
board and I really sat down with a therapist and
I was very lucky. I was with the same person
for three and a half years. It was the same
person every other week, and that stability and that ability
to tell my story, and it kind of really dig
in to the things that made me tick, the things
that bothered me, the issues that I had, and the
(04:06):
things that I was good at.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
You know, you really don't know till you inter you.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
Know, until you talk about it with someone that's just
a non bias right down the middle.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
We'll tell you one way or the other what they think.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
And the great thing about my therapist was she was
very much like me, very type A personality, so she
was able to dig through the things that made me
tick and it kind of opened up this whole new
world that I wasn't even paying attention to until I
started going to therapy.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
So let me let me say something here. And this
might be you're type A. Admittedly you're a type A person.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah, dung ho.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Obviously you're a guy. I would say. Not many people
in your position would say, all right, I want to
see a therapist.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, Now that's being a little cliche. I admit that stereotype,
but that's that's real. A lot of guys are like, ah,
how how did that come about for you?
Speaker 2 (05:01):
You know, guy, I don't. I don't even really know, man.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
I just I've always been somebody that has always looked
in the mirror and I when I'm not feeling right
a certain way. You know, that's one thing to talk
to friends, because friends will tell you what you want
to hear, right, your parents will tell you what you
want to hear. And my parents, surprisingly and I love
my parents. My parents have been married forever fifty years.
I came from a very great family, but a very
(05:24):
non emotional family. When I was growing up, there wasn't
a lot of sharing of feelings within our family. My
dad worked in a maxim security prison. He ran the
dietary service at the maxim security prison in Pittsburgh.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Neither one of them went to college.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
My mom was very successful in the medical business, worked
her way up grinded so our family and my brother,
who just retired from the military today, was military for
twenty some years. We come from a military family. So
I don't know what made me different.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Guy. I wish I knew the answer to that.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
But for me, I've always been someone who's been interested
in my own feelings and why I feel the way
that I do.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
And I'm some as we can.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
See today is I like talking, and I like talking
about the things that make me tick and the things
that I feel.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
So I said, let me try the therapy thing. And
for me, therapy was more.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
About career building and life coaching and also being able
to talk about my feelings. And I found again very
lucky to find somebody that was able to give me
all three of those things for the entire period of time.
So I don't know where it came from, but I've
always been something somebody that's looked in the mirror and
asked questions and tried to find answers to those questions.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Well, I mean, I certainly admire that, and I think that, yeah,
you're welcome, and I think a lot of us could
could use that, follow that example. So when you got
in there, when you started therapy, you said, used it
for like coaching and career building? Yeah, did you What
(06:50):
did you learn? What did you start to find out
about yourself?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
So it's funny.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
The first time that I walked into therapy, I remember
the first thing I said to my therapist was there's
something wrong with me and I don't know what it is.
Like verbatim, that's what I said, There's something wrong with me,
and I don't know what it is. Because again, at
that point in my life, I should have been feeling
much more joy than I was, and I think that
was kind of what sparked me to say, I need
to go talk to somebody about this.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
But you know what I learned about myself?
Speaker 3 (07:17):
That was I guess eye opening was is I think
I was overly hard on myself at all times, and
I never allowed myself to embrace the winds that I
was accomplishing in my career.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
And because I had such a just a straightforward.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Mentality of Okay, what's next on the agenda, what's the
next thing to accomplish, I never allowed myself the ability
to understand and appreciate the things I did do well
and the things I worked to succeed and all the
strides that I made and people that I have helped
along the way.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
So that was very eye opening.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
And it also was eye opening to kind of connect
the dots I like I mentioned before, you know, coming
from an unemotional family and being an emotional person, that's
a tough disconnect to piece together because you don't really
know o where each one of them comes from. So
being able to appreciate and understand who I am as
a person that takes time. And you know, some things
(08:08):
that you deal with as a kid that you really
don't think about until you bring it up in conversation,
Just little tiny things that all started to put the
you know, connect the dots, put the pieces together that
helped me understand more about how the way that I ticked,
and then how can I be better for the people
around me? Because something that's always been a driver for
me is making the people around me better. And I
(08:29):
don't think I realized that I was doing that more
than than I thought.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
So you start therapy, you start learning stuff about you.
How does this shift your thoughts and ideas about the
path you want to take professionally? Yeah, and even.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Personally yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
And going back to something else I thought of was
I was a somewhat reactionary person where I really learned
over the three and a half years how to real
in the emotions right like because for me, again very type,
a very eyes forward, moving one hundred miles an hour.
When you do that, you kind of react to things
in ways that maybe aren't the best ways to do it.
(09:11):
You're not processing emotions as well as you should. And
I think that goes across the board for everything personally
and professionally, that you can't act on emotions, you can't
do the first thing that comes to your head. And
so my theervice was really good about giving me techniques
that when I'm feeling a certain way, hitting the pause
for a second, taking a breath, and then thinking through
(09:32):
why do we feel this way? Let's evaluate the situation.
I think one of the problems I had before was
I was a doomsdayer. So when I thought things could
go wrong, those were thoughts that kind of ruled my
brain a little bit. But then more often than not,
those things didn't happen, and instead of being like you
overestimated the bad thing that was going to happen, it
didn't happen. That allows me to then to kind of
(09:53):
stay in the moment a little bit better. And you know,
I think the worst surrounded by emotions, whether it's from
ourselves or people around us all the time. So to
be able to maybe recognize other people's emotions and understand
why they're going through the things they're doing helps me
understand people emotions better and allows me to have that
conversation or bridge the gap between how I'm feeling and
how other people are feeling. And all people want to
(10:14):
do is be seen and heard, and if you can
do that, that's eighty percent of the battle right there.
So I've learned how to control my emotions and control
the reactions to the emotions.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
What did you start doing differently in terms of your
professional life?
Speaker 3 (10:30):
So on a day to day just trying to slow
down and keep things together.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
I always tell people I work better when I'm doing
ten things at once.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
That may be true from a work stance, but I
don't think anybody emotionally does better the more that they have,
just because brain overload is not good for anybody. But
I think I have been able to compartmentalize a lot
of things in my career, a lot of things that
I'm doing now because I like, for example, I've got
three real estate projects going on. I'm working on a
(10:58):
major deal down in Sea. I'm working on a huge
senior living deal. I have almost twelve Airbnbs short term
rentals that we're managing. So like, there's a lot of
things that I do that require me to be in
a bunch of different directions at one time. But now
I plan it out betther word. Before I would just
get in my car and I'd start driving and figured
it out once we hit the road. Now there is
more of a distinct plan, and it keeps me focused
(11:21):
and it keeps my emotions in check, so I know
where I'm going next, I know what the next objective is,
so that I'm not trying to do ten things at once,
because that's when the emotions go off the track.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
In your bio, it says you're passionate about reaching men,
entrepreneurs and young people under constant pressure to perform. I mean,
obviously the you know this constant pressure to perform is
rampant in our culture. Why why does that matter to you?
Why did what does that get you?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (11:53):
So I think the key thing to focus on here
is the men portion of it. I think women are
much better than men when it saying, hey, there's something
bothered me and I need to figure out what it is.
I think you said it yourself when we first started here,
that the stigma around men going to therapy is that
you're weak or that you know you haven't you can't
figure out your own issues.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
And honestly, I think it's the different. I think it's different.
It's the complete opposite.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
And I think if you asked women what they thought
about that, I think they would be more attracted to
men that are open to say, look, I'm not perfect
and I'm willing to go and talk to somebody to
make myself better. I know that speaking personally, my girlfriend,
who were almost on two years now, she said, right,
off the top. It was one of my favorite things
about you that you were very vulnerable to say. Look,
I'm still work in progress still, and at that time
(12:38):
I was still going to therapy. So you know, I
try to encourage men. Look, we have a lot of
weight on our shoulders.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
We kind of have that.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
Unspoken you're supposed to be successful. If you're not, you
get ostracized, and so that that create makes it tough, right,
and men are not supposed to be open with their
feelings and emotions.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
They're not supposed to be open with stuff like this.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
But it's been my experience that when I tell people
about it, there's almost this level of Okay, we respect
that more because I think that also brings transparency that
if I could be transparent with you about my own
personal struggles, I'm gonna be transparent about everything else in
my life.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
So it creates a level of trust too.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
I would say I totally agree. And also I think
it's not just uh a move, you know, seeing a therapist,
not just a move that can be helpful, but it's
just smart. Yeah, you know, if you if we keep
banging our heads up against the wall, we need we
need to do something different. So what are you doing
(13:38):
now in terms of your business? You know, before earlier
on in the conversation with the sports thing, were you athletic?
I mean, obviously we're athletic. Were you into into sports?
Were you like in college and going turning professional type
thing or what? No?
Speaker 2 (13:54):
God, no, so not nothing like that. Like I said,
I came from Pittsburgh. I came from.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
Pittsburgh, which is obviously a very sports rich city, and
my grandfather had season tickets to the Penguins growing up,
so I saw two championships before I was six years old.
My dad was a huge My dad was a huge
Steelers fan. So I played I played hockey, I played golf,
I played baseball. I still play golf and now I'm
actually a pretty decent golfer. But nothing on the level
(14:18):
of like going pro. For me, it was more about
I love to talk about sports, and my personality lended
me to be able to say things maybe in a
little bit of a different way that kind of engages people.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
And I used to talk in.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
Front of large groups of people as early as like
five years old, talking about the Penguins. So talking in
front of people was never an issue for me, and
I genuinely enjoyed talking about sports. I still do now
so but you know, with the career now, you know
I was focusing on real estate.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
But for me, I tend to get into things.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
My kind of claim to fame is I know somebody
for everything, and if I don't, I.
Speaker 2 (14:52):
Know somebody that does.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
So when when I talk about the deal in Seabring,
it's a major, massive real estate development project but also
has a golf course attached to it.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
So through my.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
Contact of knowing people, I was able to get in
touch with the owner. Now I'm helping him facilitate a
buyer on the senior living side. Obviously, I've done a
ton of work in senior living, but I know a
ton of investors that love to put money into senior
living buildings. I know a guy that's selling a building.
I connect the dots. So you know, I'm a real
estate agent, so I love showing homes and doing things
like that. But for me, you know, I'm still a
senior living consultant. I can sull for multiple buildings in
(15:24):
multiple states. I'm kind of a jack of all trades
when it comes to senior living. But the company started
as kind of a real estate you know, renovations, new builds,
real estate investments, things of that nature. To me, it's
a bit too volatile, especially right now with the storms
that happen in Florida. But I'm starting to realize that
my bread and butter is becoming connecting people, so bridging
(15:44):
opportunities with individuals and relationships. So that's probably where the
company's going now. But I still am vary in the forefront.
I mean, I'd love to get I talked to. I've
done a couple of sports podcasts, so I'm really looking
into doing that.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
But for me, I'm just enjoying what I'm doing.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
I'm very involved with a nonprofit that focuses on mental health.
We just had an event in Atlanta last week and
went really well, so.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
I got my hands on a lot of different things
and all that makes me happy.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Oh my god. So this, I mean, you're obviously in
I mean, I don't mean this in a disparaging way,
but it sounds like you're like a connector of people.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Yeah, I am.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
You're entrepreneur, You're a connector this idea of working with
Is it safe to say you're working in the mental
health field to a certain degree.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Of course, honestly, I would say that every most job
professions include mental health in some way.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
But a lot of people don't or want to admit
that is the.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Correct sure and I would absolutely agree with that.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Do you find your how did you get comfortable with that?
Speaker 2 (16:57):
You know?
Speaker 3 (16:58):
The perfect answer guy is that I am, for better
or worse, extremely authentic. I honestly, I don't care what
anybody else thinks, right like, if I know I'm leading
my true path and I'm doing what I know makes
me happy, and I'm true to people, right like, I
treat everybody fairly, for better or worse. Right if you're
not a good person, I'm probably gonna treat you that
you're not a good person. I'm just an authentic person,
(17:21):
and I think I've been able to build and grow
and maintain relationships because people know I'm true to my word.
It's almost impossible for me to lie about anything. I
just don't have the capabilities meant to lead a lot
of people because it would drive me nuts.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
I just can't do it.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
People that know me the best know me that for
better or worse, you're gonna know exactly what Dan is
thinking one hundred percent of the time. So in saying that,
you know, I'm comfortable with that because I know that
if I know that I'm not everybody's cup of tea,
nobody is any everybody's cup of tea. But at least
I know that going into business partnerships, like, if I'm
not gonna be able to work with somebody, that's totally fine.
(17:57):
I'd rather know that off the top than get halfway
through something and be like, Wow, I really don't like
this person.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So that's life though. I mean, I'm not gonna make
everybody happy. Not everyone's gonna love me.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
But if I stay true to myself and I know
my morals and my integrity towards other people, I as
long as.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I can maintain that, I think I'll be okay going forward.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
What has been with this, with this topic of mental
health and authenticity, what's been really challenging for you? One
of the things that's been challenging for you within this topic.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
I don't know, I mean the authenticity thing. Nothing.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
I don't think it's really been challenging because I've just
I made a decision a long time ago this is
who I am, and I think it's it's you know,
it's funny someone brought up an example about if you
were to type out an email okay and send it
to someone who knew you, and then you were to
go to take that email and put it in a
chat GTP and send the same person that email, they
would know that the AI message is not you.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
And so I relate that too.
Speaker 3 (18:59):
If I was trying to be someone that just appeased people,
everybody would know I was faking it. So for me,
I just go back to the authenticity thing is number
one first and foremost with me.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
I try to be very sweet to everybody.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
At the beginning, but I'm also someone that can look
at someone and be like, hey, no offense, but like
I can't work with you, Like it's not gonna work out.
So the authenticity thing is has not really been a
challenge for me because I just every day I get
up and I just stay true to who I am.
And I think I think there was probably a time
guy before I went to therapy, where I maybe did
try to change.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Who I was to appease people. What I learned is
is that never works.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
Ever, So I think going to therapy and understanding that
that tactic never really works was like, Okay, just be
you and if it works, great, and if it doesn't,
you just keep it moving.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
That's hard to do for a lot of us, though,
I mean you talk about it like you just do it,
and I totally admire that. But for a lot of us,
for a lot of maybe for a lot of men,
it's you know, a lot of men have have a
what affront right? You said it, We've got to be successful,
(20:06):
We've got to be strong, blah blah blah blah blah yah.
But how do we cultivate that?
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:12):
What I've learned in my relationships and I'm grateful for
a lot of the relationships have. I have very very
high end guys, very high end people, contacts just good people,
have great families, have a lot of money, super successful
in their careers. And what I kind of realized relatively
early in my career, but more in the last like
four or five years, was that people will do business
(20:35):
with you if they like you. And for me, as
I was building relationships, for me, it was never in
the forefront of like I would look at somebody and
be like, oh, yeah, that's someone that could make me money.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
I never thought that way.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Because again, I know what it's like when people come
up to me and even marketing events or events, and
they immediately start trying to sell me, and it's like,
I want to tell them, buddy, I'm not going to
work with you if I don't know who you are.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
To know me and let me get to know you.
About who you are, what's your family like, what do
you like to do? What sports you into?
Speaker 1 (21:06):
You?
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Are you a golfer? You know? What are your political views? Like?
Speaker 3 (21:10):
For me getting to know somebody and getting to understand them.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
A lot of people advise don't work with.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Family and friends or people you know, and like, I
think the opposite, Like most, if not all, the business
I do is with friends, family, people, I know, people
I trust, people that know and trust me, and it's
worked out great so far.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Finally, how do you work with men? I mean when
you say your interest is men entrepreneurs, is in what
capacity are you doing that? Are you trying to reach them?
Speaker 2 (21:42):
It's great question.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
So I think one of the questions you asked me earlier,
and I wanted to make a point of this, was
I feel like I'm I saw I'll be forty in March,
and so I feel like I am the last generation
that understands social media, but.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
Didn't grow up with it.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
So like when I was in my teens, we were
out playing, we played sports all day. Social media wasn't
really a thing, didn't really start happening. So I became
a freshman in college. So because of that, I think
that it gives it gives me a unique perspective of
what it was like without it and what it's like
with it. And I think a lot of men, a
lot of men, struggle with this perception of no matter
(22:18):
what you do, it's never good enough, because all you
see on your algorithms is somebody doing better than you,
someone with a bigger boat, someone with a nicer car,
like and that is hard.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
It's hard to keep up with always chasing what you
see online.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
And then when you start seeing people with boats, cars,
exotic trips.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
That's all you see. And so a lot of these.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Guys are probably doing pretty well, but then they go
online and they're like, man, I'm not even close to
being where I want to be. So that and I
got that even pre social media, like I was always
pushing myself to be better. So I think bridging the
two generations together, the younger generation to me to say, look,
I get it, like I understand the pressures of social media,
but like I can tell you what it's like without
it too.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
And share that insight with them. You know.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
The nonprofit that I work with, we do a lot
of intergenerational mental health care. So, like you know, working
with seniors and senior living, that's obviously a huge focus
for mental health, but the younger generation too, how it
is with social media and how tough it is to
just be yourself in today's day and age and just
be who you are and accept.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
That and roll with it. It's tough.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
And so we work with also foster kids aging out
of the foster care system.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
What do they do when they become adults. We work
with programs.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
We just took fifty two kids to the New England
Patriots game through Austin Hooper's Foundation. So I mean that's
a life changing event for those kids that they don't
know what's going to happen next. So, and I love
to talk, like I said before, so I would just
love to have somebody come up to me and say, look,
here's where I'm at, here's what I'm struggling with. What's
your advice. You've been there, you've done that. And if
I can help one person say, you know what, maybe
(23:49):
the social media stuff I don't need to pay that
much attention to it, or they can walk away from
the conversation being like, you know what, I feel better
about myself. That's all the world needs, is just one
at a time, one at a time, one at a time.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
What is the name of the mental health nonprofit?
Speaker 3 (24:04):
So so the nonprofit is ardam veil A R T
E M V A L E.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Okay, ardam veil. And is that ardamveail dot com.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
I believe that it is. Yes, I gotta check. I
could check.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
My girlfriend does all the back office stuff and she
they threw an incredible event in Atlanta, raised a bunch
of money, had about one hundred and ten people in
the room. It was a great event and just something
I'm super passionate about. So it's cool. You're actually the
first podcast that I have shared this information with. So congratulations,
and I'm glad to be able to talk about it
now and get this out to a wider audience because
(24:40):
now more than ever, all of us need a little
mental health help.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Well, I just really appreciate you and your approach and
your your willingness to you know, open yourself up. You
don't meet a lot of people like yourself. You don't
meet a lot of men like yourself. I think you're
setting an incredible example for not just people in general,
(25:04):
but certainly for men.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Thank you so much, I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
Welcome Dan. What's the best way for people to learn
more about you and what you're doing?
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Sir?
Speaker 1 (25:13):
So?
Speaker 3 (25:13):
The company's Burg to Bay Partners, So Pittsburgh to Tampa
Bay Burg Debate Partners. I'm on Instagram. We have a
website LinkedIn all that, so you can find me personally.
Just Dan for Breezy on Instagram DJ for Breezy on Instagram.
But the business page is Burg Debate Partners and would
love to connect.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
It doesn't matter.
Speaker 3 (25:30):
The beauty again with the beauty of what I do
is it doesn't matter, right like, no matter what industry
you're in, I want to know you. I want to
get to know what you do, what drives you, and
have a conversation. I'm always open to conversations. And again,
I helping people really brings a lot of joy to me.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
So in any capacity that I can do that, I'm
open to it.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
Awesome all right. We'll have each of those linked up
here at the show notes page at the Trauma Therapist
podcast dot com. Dan, thanks so much, Ben for being here,
super inspiring, and we'll be in touch.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
Thank you so much. I appreciate you having me all
right by them. Take care,
Welcome to the Trauma Theverors podcast. My name is Guimiferson
and I interview incredible people who share the story of
how trauma has shaped their lives. And a big thank
you for sponsoring today's episode goes to my guest and
our sponsors. SO five four, three, two and one, Our folks,
(00:25):
welcome back to the podcast. Very excited to have as
my guest today, Dan Frebreezy Dan, Welcome.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Thank you, thanks for having me awesome SO.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Dan is a real estate entrepreneur and senior living consultant
whose career include leading one of Florida's largest and most
effective COVID care units for twelve hundred plus seniors. Despite
his success, burnout pushed him toward therapy and a personal
reinvention that reshaped both his business and his identity. Now,
as founder of burg Debate Partners, Dan brings radical honesty
(00:56):
and emotional intelligence to conversations about trauma, leadership, resilience, passionate
about reaching men, entrepreneurs, and young people under constant pressure
to perform. He speaks with a candid, unfiltered voice, grounded
and lived experience. Well, Jesus, that sounds like we need
a lot of need. We need that right now.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Yeah, and I don't know, I don't know that we'll
have enough time to cover all of that, but I
appreciate the introduction.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Thank you of course, of course. All right, so before
we go in here, share with the listeners where you're
from originally and where you are currently.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
So I'm originally from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I was born and
raised diehard sports fan out of Pittsburgh. And actually tomorrow
is my twelve year anniversary of moving to Tampa, Florida.
So I'm now currently in Tampa, Florida, and I've been
there for tomorrow will be twelve years.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
All right, awesome, So very interesting bio. How did this start?
When I say this, I mean this kind of reinvention
if you will, burnout invention. Yeah, really interesting.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
You know, it's it's funny.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
I feel like I've reinvented myself four times in my life.
And one of the things that wasn't mentioned on the
bio was that I thought my path was going to
be in sports. And I was a co host at
ESPN Radio when I lived in Pittsburgh, and growing up,
I always thought that was going to be, you know,
my ultimate goal to be on the radio. I worked
for the Penguins back in two thousand and eight. I
(02:19):
did a lot of the on ice and in promotion things.
But I had the opportunity to meet the program director
at ESPN, and just through caddying for him at Oakmond
Country Club, he gave me the opportunity to come on
the radio. And you know, me, thinking that was my dream,
was so pumped to do it. And I got about
eight months into and I said, this doesn't feel right,
this doesn't feel like this.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Is the path for me.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
So that was the end of the first you know,
reinvention of myself. And I worked in healthcare for a
bit and then when I moved to Florida, just through
contacts and building relationships, kind of started at the bottom
of senior living and worked my way up to being
a senior vice president of a company. And that came
after running the COVID unit where we took care of
a ton of people and made a ton of great
(03:02):
relationships with all the local hospitals, and you know, we
started to buy up new communities. We started to create
a management company and an ownership group, and like I said,
I got up to senior vice president of the company,
making great money, probably more money than I ever thought
I would make, but again, it didn't feel like that
was my purpose.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
And hold on a second, why why didn't it feel
like it?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
I think what really turned in me was, I think
when I ran that COVID unit and there was so
much pressure to do well, and when I did well,
that made me think, Okay, maybe I do have the
capabilities of doing my own things, starting my own business,
carving my own path. And you know, it was a
tough part because I was doing well and progressing through
my career and making great money, but it still didn't
(03:45):
feel like it was enough. It didn't feel like it
was my path. So I went back to the drawing
board and I really sat down with a therapist and
I was very lucky. I was with the same person
for three and a half years. It was the same
person every other week, and that stability and that ability
to tell my story, and it kind of really dig
in to the things that made me tick, the things
that bothered me, the issues that I had, and the
(04:06):
things that I was good at.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
You know, you really don't know till you inter you.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
Know, until you talk about it with someone that's just
a non bias right down the middle.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
We'll tell you one way or the other what they think.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
And the great thing about my therapist was she was
very much like me, very type A personality, so she
was able to dig through the things that made me
tick and it kind of opened up this whole new
world that I wasn't even paying attention to until I
started going to therapy.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
So let me let me say something here. And this
might be you're type A. Admittedly you're a type A person.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah, dung ho.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Obviously you're a guy. I would say. Not many people
in your position would say, all right, I want to
see a therapist.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, Now that's being a little cliche. I admit that stereotype,
but that's that's real. A lot of guys are like, ah,
how how did that come about for you?
Speaker 2 (05:01):
You know, guy, I don't. I don't even really know, man.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
I just I've always been somebody that has always looked
in the mirror and I when I'm not feeling right
a certain way. You know, that's one thing to talk
to friends, because friends will tell you what you want
to hear, right, your parents will tell you what you
want to hear. And my parents, surprisingly and I love
my parents. My parents have been married forever fifty years.
I came from a very great family, but a very
(05:24):
non emotional family. When I was growing up, there wasn't
a lot of sharing of feelings within our family. My
dad worked in a maxim security prison. He ran the
dietary service at the maxim security prison in Pittsburgh.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Neither one of them went to college.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
My mom was very successful in the medical business, worked
her way up grinded so our family and my brother,
who just retired from the military today, was military for
twenty some years. We come from a military family. So
I don't know what made me different.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Guy. I wish I knew the answer to that.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
But for me, I've always been someone who's been interested
in my own feelings and why I feel the way
that I do.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
And I'm some as we can.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
See today is I like talking, and I like talking
about the things that make me tick and the things
that I feel.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
So I said, let me try the therapy thing. And
for me, therapy was more.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
About career building and life coaching and also being able
to talk about my feelings. And I found again very
lucky to find somebody that was able to give me
all three of those things for the entire period of time.
So I don't know where it came from, but I've
always been something somebody that's looked in the mirror and
asked questions and tried to find answers to those questions.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Well, I mean, I certainly admire that, and I think that, yeah,
you're welcome, and I think a lot of us could
could use that, follow that example. So when you got
in there, when you started therapy, you said, used it
for like coaching and career building? Yeah, did you What
(06:50):
did you learn? What did you start to find out
about yourself?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
So it's funny.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
The first time that I walked into therapy, I remember
the first thing I said to my therapist was there's
something wrong with me and I don't know what it is.
Like verbatim, that's what I said, There's something wrong with me,
and I don't know what it is. Because again, at
that point in my life, I should have been feeling
much more joy than I was, and I think that
was kind of what sparked me to say, I need
to go talk to somebody about this.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
But you know what I learned about myself?
Speaker 3 (07:17):
That was I guess eye opening was is I think
I was overly hard on myself at all times, and
I never allowed myself to embrace the winds that I
was accomplishing in my career.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
And because I had such a just a straightforward.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Mentality of Okay, what's next on the agenda, what's the
next thing to accomplish, I never allowed myself the ability
to understand and appreciate the things I did do well
and the things I worked to succeed and all the
strides that I made and people that I have helped
along the way.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
So that was very eye opening.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
And it also was eye opening to kind of connect
the dots I like I mentioned before, you know, coming
from an unemotional family and being an emotional person, that's
a tough disconnect to piece together because you don't really
know o where each one of them comes from. So
being able to appreciate and understand who I am as
a person that takes time. And you know, some things
(08:08):
that you deal with as a kid that you really
don't think about until you bring it up in conversation,
Just little tiny things that all started to put the
you know, connect the dots, put the pieces together that
helped me understand more about how the way that I ticked,
and then how can I be better for the people
around me? Because something that's always been a driver for
me is making the people around me better. And I
(08:29):
don't think I realized that I was doing that more
than than I thought.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
So you start therapy, you start learning stuff about you.
How does this shift your thoughts and ideas about the
path you want to take professionally? Yeah, and even.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Personally yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
And going back to something else I thought of was
I was a somewhat reactionary person where I really learned
over the three and a half years how to real
in the emotions right like because for me, again very type,
a very eyes forward, moving one hundred miles an hour.
When you do that, you kind of react to things
in ways that maybe aren't the best ways to do it.
(09:11):
You're not processing emotions as well as you should. And
I think that goes across the board for everything personally
and professionally, that you can't act on emotions, you can't
do the first thing that comes to your head. And
so my theervice was really good about giving me techniques
that when I'm feeling a certain way, hitting the pause
for a second, taking a breath, and then thinking through
(09:32):
why do we feel this way? Let's evaluate the situation.
I think one of the problems I had before was
I was a doomsdayer. So when I thought things could
go wrong, those were thoughts that kind of ruled my
brain a little bit. But then more often than not,
those things didn't happen, and instead of being like you
overestimated the bad thing that was going to happen, it
didn't happen. That allows me to then to kind of
(09:53):
stay in the moment a little bit better. And you know,
I think the worst surrounded by emotions, whether it's from
ourselves or people around us all the time. So to
be able to maybe recognize other people's emotions and understand
why they're going through the things they're doing helps me
understand people emotions better and allows me to have that
conversation or bridge the gap between how I'm feeling and
how other people are feeling. And all people want to
(10:14):
do is be seen and heard, and if you can
do that, that's eighty percent of the battle right there.
So I've learned how to control my emotions and control
the reactions to the emotions.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
What did you start doing differently in terms of your
professional life?
Speaker 3 (10:30):
So on a day to day just trying to slow
down and keep things together.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
I always tell people I work better when I'm doing
ten things at once.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
That may be true from a work stance, but I
don't think anybody emotionally does better the more that they have,
just because brain overload is not good for anybody. But
I think I have been able to compartmentalize a lot
of things in my career, a lot of things that
I'm doing now because I like, for example, I've got
three real estate projects going on. I'm working on a
(10:58):
major deal down in Sea. I'm working on a huge
senior living deal. I have almost twelve Airbnbs short term
rentals that we're managing. So like, there's a lot of
things that I do that require me to be in
a bunch of different directions at one time. But now
I plan it out betther word. Before I would just
get in my car and I'd start driving and figured
it out once we hit the road. Now there is
more of a distinct plan, and it keeps me focused
(11:21):
and it keeps my emotions in check, so I know
where I'm going next, I know what the next objective is,
so that I'm not trying to do ten things at once,
because that's when the emotions go off the track.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
In your bio, it says you're passionate about reaching men,
entrepreneurs and young people under constant pressure to perform. I mean,
obviously the you know this constant pressure to perform is
rampant in our culture. Why why does that matter to you?
Why did what does that get you?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (11:53):
So I think the key thing to focus on here
is the men portion of it. I think women are
much better than men when it saying, hey, there's something
bothered me and I need to figure out what it is.
I think you said it yourself when we first started here,
that the stigma around men going to therapy is that
you're weak or that you know you haven't you can't
figure out your own issues.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
And honestly, I think it's the different. I think it's different.
It's the complete opposite.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
And I think if you asked women what they thought
about that, I think they would be more attracted to
men that are open to say, look, I'm not perfect
and I'm willing to go and talk to somebody to
make myself better. I know that speaking personally, my girlfriend,
who were almost on two years now, she said, right,
off the top. It was one of my favorite things
about you that you were very vulnerable to say. Look,
I'm still work in progress still, and at that time
(12:38):
I was still going to therapy. So you know, I
try to encourage men. Look, we have a lot of
weight on our shoulders.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
We kind of have that.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
Unspoken you're supposed to be successful. If you're not, you
get ostracized, and so that that create makes it tough, right,
and men are not supposed to be open with their
feelings and emotions.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
They're not supposed to be open with stuff like this.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
But it's been my experience that when I tell people
about it, there's almost this level of Okay, we respect
that more because I think that also brings transparency that
if I could be transparent with you about my own
personal struggles, I'm gonna be transparent about everything else in
my life.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
So it creates a level of trust too.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
I would say I totally agree. And also I think
it's not just uh a move, you know, seeing a therapist,
not just a move that can be helpful, but it's
just smart. Yeah, you know, if you if we keep
banging our heads up against the wall, we need we
need to do something different. So what are you doing
(13:38):
now in terms of your business? You know, before earlier
on in the conversation with the sports thing, were you athletic?
I mean, obviously we're athletic. Were you into into sports?
Were you like in college and going turning professional type
thing or what? No?
Speaker 2 (13:54):
God, no, so not nothing like that. Like I said,
I came from Pittsburgh. I came from.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
Pittsburgh, which is obviously a very sports rich city, and
my grandfather had season tickets to the Penguins growing up,
so I saw two championships before I was six years old.
My dad was a huge My dad was a huge
Steelers fan. So I played I played hockey, I played golf,
I played baseball. I still play golf and now I'm
actually a pretty decent golfer. But nothing on the level
(14:18):
of like going pro. For me, it was more about
I love to talk about sports, and my personality lended
me to be able to say things maybe in a
little bit of a different way that kind of engages people.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
And I used to talk in.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
Front of large groups of people as early as like
five years old, talking about the Penguins. So talking in
front of people was never an issue for me, and
I genuinely enjoyed talking about sports. I still do now
so but you know, with the career now, you know
I was focusing on real estate.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
But for me, I tend to get into things.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
My kind of claim to fame is I know somebody
for everything, and if I don't, I.
Speaker 2 (14:52):
Know somebody that does.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
So when when I talk about the deal in Seabring,
it's a major, massive real estate development project but also
has a golf course attached to it.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
So through my.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
Contact of knowing people, I was able to get in
touch with the owner. Now I'm helping him facilitate a
buyer on the senior living side. Obviously, I've done a
ton of work in senior living, but I know a
ton of investors that love to put money into senior
living buildings. I know a guy that's selling a building.
I connect the dots. So you know, I'm a real
estate agent, so I love showing homes and doing things
like that. But for me, you know, I'm still a
senior living consultant. I can sull for multiple buildings in
(15:24):
multiple states. I'm kind of a jack of all trades
when it comes to senior living. But the company started
as kind of a real estate you know, renovations, new builds,
real estate investments, things of that nature. To me, it's
a bit too volatile, especially right now with the storms
that happen in Florida. But I'm starting to realize that
my bread and butter is becoming connecting people, so bridging
(15:44):
opportunities with individuals and relationships. So that's probably where the
company's going now. But I still am vary in the forefront.
I mean, I'd love to get I talked to. I've
done a couple of sports podcasts, so I'm really looking
into doing that.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
But for me, I'm just enjoying what I'm doing.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
I'm very involved with a nonprofit that focuses on mental health.
We just had an event in Atlanta last week and
went really well, so.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
I got my hands on a lot of different things
and all that makes me happy.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Oh my god. So this, I mean, you're obviously in
I mean, I don't mean this in a disparaging way,
but it sounds like you're like a connector of people.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Yeah, I am.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
You're entrepreneur, You're a connector this idea of working with
Is it safe to say you're working in the mental
health field to a certain degree.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Of course, honestly, I would say that every most job
professions include mental health in some way.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
But a lot of people don't or want to admit
that is the.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Correct sure and I would absolutely agree with that.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Do you find your how did you get comfortable with that?
Speaker 2 (16:57):
You know?
Speaker 3 (16:58):
The perfect answer guy is that I am, for better
or worse, extremely authentic. I honestly, I don't care what
anybody else thinks, right like, if I know I'm leading
my true path and I'm doing what I know makes
me happy, and I'm true to people, right like, I
treat everybody fairly, for better or worse. Right if you're
not a good person, I'm probably gonna treat you that
you're not a good person. I'm just an authentic person,
(17:21):
and I think I've been able to build and grow
and maintain relationships because people know I'm true to my word.
It's almost impossible for me to lie about anything. I
just don't have the capabilities meant to lead a lot
of people because it would drive me nuts.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
I just can't do it.
Speaker 3 (17:36):
People that know me the best know me that for
better or worse, you're gonna know exactly what Dan is
thinking one hundred percent of the time. So in saying that,
you know, I'm comfortable with that because I know that
if I know that I'm not everybody's cup of tea,
nobody is any everybody's cup of tea. But at least
I know that going into business partnerships, like, if I'm
not gonna be able to work with somebody, that's totally fine.
(17:57):
I'd rather know that off the top than get halfway
through something and be like, Wow, I really don't like
this person.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
So that's life though. I mean, I'm not gonna make
everybody happy. Not everyone's gonna love me.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
But if I stay true to myself and I know
my morals and my integrity towards other people, I as
long as.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I can maintain that, I think I'll be okay going forward.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
What has been with this, with this topic of mental
health and authenticity, what's been really challenging for you? One
of the things that's been challenging for you within this topic.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
I don't know, I mean the authenticity thing. Nothing.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
I don't think it's really been challenging because I've just
I made a decision a long time ago this is
who I am, and I think it's it's you know,
it's funny someone brought up an example about if you
were to type out an email okay and send it
to someone who knew you, and then you were to
go to take that email and put it in a
chat GTP and send the same person that email, they
would know that the AI message is not you.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
And so I relate that too.
Speaker 3 (18:59):
If I was trying to be someone that just appeased people,
everybody would know I was faking it. So for me,
I just go back to the authenticity thing is number
one first and foremost with me.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
I try to be very sweet to everybody.
Speaker 3 (19:12):
At the beginning, but I'm also someone that can look
at someone and be like, hey, no offense, but like
I can't work with you, Like it's not gonna work out.
So the authenticity thing is has not really been a
challenge for me because I just every day I get
up and I just stay true to who I am.
And I think I think there was probably a time
guy before I went to therapy, where I maybe did
try to change.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Who I was to appease people. What I learned is
is that never works.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
Ever, So I think going to therapy and understanding that
that tactic never really works was like, Okay, just be
you and if it works, great, and if it doesn't,
you just keep it moving.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
That's hard to do for a lot of us, though,
I mean you talk about it like you just do it,
and I totally admire that. But for a lot of us,
for a lot of maybe for a lot of men,
it's you know, a lot of men have have a
what affront right? You said it, We've got to be successful,
(20:06):
We've got to be strong, blah blah blah blah blah yah.
But how do we cultivate that?
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:12):
What I've learned in my relationships and I'm grateful for
a lot of the relationships have. I have very very
high end guys, very high end people, contacts just good people,
have great families, have a lot of money, super successful
in their careers. And what I kind of realized relatively
early in my career, but more in the last like
four or five years, was that people will do business
(20:35):
with you if they like you. And for me, as
I was building relationships, for me, it was never in
the forefront of like I would look at somebody and
be like, oh, yeah, that's someone that could make me money.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
I never thought that way.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Because again, I know what it's like when people come
up to me and even marketing events or events, and
they immediately start trying to sell me, and it's like,
I want to tell them, buddy, I'm not going to
work with you if I don't know who you are.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
To know me and let me get to know you.
About who you are, what's your family like, what do
you like to do? What sports you into?
Speaker 1 (21:06):
You?
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Are you a golfer? You know? What are your political views? Like?
Speaker 3 (21:10):
For me getting to know somebody and getting to understand them.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
A lot of people advise don't work with.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Family and friends or people you know, and like, I
think the opposite, Like most, if not all, the business
I do is with friends, family, people, I know, people
I trust, people that know and trust me, and it's
worked out great so far.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Finally, how do you work with men? I mean when
you say your interest is men entrepreneurs, is in what
capacity are you doing that? Are you trying to reach them?
Speaker 2 (21:42):
It's great question.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
So I think one of the questions you asked me earlier,
and I wanted to make a point of this, was
I feel like I'm I saw I'll be forty in March,
and so I feel like I am the last generation
that understands social media, but.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
Didn't grow up with it.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
So like when I was in my teens, we were
out playing, we played sports all day. Social media wasn't
really a thing, didn't really start happening. So I became
a freshman in college. So because of that, I think
that it gives it gives me a unique perspective of
what it was like without it and what it's like
with it. And I think a lot of men, a
lot of men, struggle with this perception of no matter
(22:18):
what you do, it's never good enough, because all you
see on your algorithms is somebody doing better than you,
someone with a bigger boat, someone with a nicer car,
like and that is hard.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
It's hard to keep up with always chasing what you
see online.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
And then when you start seeing people with boats, cars,
exotic trips.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
That's all you see. And so a lot of these.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Guys are probably doing pretty well, but then they go
online and they're like, man, I'm not even close to
being where I want to be. So that and I
got that even pre social media, like I was always
pushing myself to be better. So I think bridging the
two generations together, the younger generation to me to say, look,
I get it, like I understand the pressures of social media,
but like I can tell you what it's like without
it too.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
And share that insight with them. You know.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
The nonprofit that I work with, we do a lot
of intergenerational mental health care. So, like you know, working
with seniors and senior living, that's obviously a huge focus
for mental health, but the younger generation too, how it
is with social media and how tough it is to
just be yourself in today's day and age and just
be who you are and accept.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
That and roll with it. It's tough.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
And so we work with also foster kids aging out
of the foster care system.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
What do they do when they become adults. We work
with programs.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
We just took fifty two kids to the New England
Patriots game through Austin Hooper's Foundation. So I mean that's
a life changing event for those kids that they don't
know what's going to happen next. So, and I love
to talk, like I said before, so I would just
love to have somebody come up to me and say, look,
here's where I'm at, here's what I'm struggling with. What's
your advice. You've been there, you've done that. And if
I can help one person say, you know what, maybe
(23:49):
the social media stuff I don't need to pay that
much attention to it, or they can walk away from
the conversation being like, you know what, I feel better
about myself. That's all the world needs, is just one
at a time, one at a time, one at a time.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
What is the name of the mental health nonprofit?
Speaker 3 (24:04):
So so the nonprofit is ardam veil A R T
E M V A L E.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Okay, ardam veil. And is that ardamveail dot com.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
I believe that it is. Yes, I gotta check. I
could check.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
My girlfriend does all the back office stuff and she
they threw an incredible event in Atlanta, raised a bunch
of money, had about one hundred and ten people in
the room. It was a great event and just something
I'm super passionate about. So it's cool. You're actually the
first podcast that I have shared this information with. So congratulations,
and I'm glad to be able to talk about it
now and get this out to a wider audience because
(24:40):
now more than ever, all of us need a little
mental health help.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Well, I just really appreciate you and your approach and
your your willingness to you know, open yourself up. You
don't meet a lot of people like yourself. You don't
meet a lot of men like yourself. I think you're
setting an incredible example for not just people in general,
(25:04):
but certainly for men.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Thank you so much, I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
Welcome Dan. What's the best way for people to learn
more about you and what you're doing?
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Sir?
Speaker 1 (25:13):
So?
Speaker 3 (25:13):
The company's Burg to Bay Partners, So Pittsburgh to Tampa
Bay Burg Debate Partners. I'm on Instagram. We have a
website LinkedIn all that, so you can find me personally.
Just Dan for Breezy on Instagram DJ for Breezy on Instagram.
But the business page is Burg Debate Partners and would
love to connect.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
It doesn't matter.
Speaker 3 (25:30):
The beauty again with the beauty of what I do
is it doesn't matter, right like, no matter what industry
you're in, I want to know you. I want to
get to know what you do, what drives you, and
have a conversation. I'm always open to conversations. And again,
I helping people really brings a lot of joy to me.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
So in any capacity that I can do that, I'm
open to it.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
Awesome all right. We'll have each of those linked up
here at the show notes page at the Trauma Therapist
podcast dot com. Dan, thanks so much, Ben for being here,
super inspiring, and we'll be in touch.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
Thank you so much. I appreciate you having me all
right by them. Take care,
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