November 25, 2023 • 56 mins
What is travel etiquette?
They say travel turns you into a storyteller... Listen in on this fun conversation between Traveling Black Women, Daniele, Keisha, Lauren and I (Nadine), as we share our purpose for traveling and the kick we get out of expecting the unexpected!
Together, the four of us have been to Guatemala, Guadeloupe, Colombia, and Mozambique!
In this episode, we chat about the do's and don'ts of traveling, researching the cultural norms in unfamiliar destinations, and staying open to how other people experience life.
Not only do we share a few of our own crazy travel stories together, but we offer some advice on how to keep the good vibes going on group trips!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome to the Traveling Black Women podcast.
(00:12):
This is episode two of season two and I have three of my favorite people in the world with
me on the line to talk about travel etiquette today.
So I know recently you've been seeing some things in the news about travelers going to
places like Dubai and not really having the best time, right?
(00:35):
Because things have gone wrong.
They've ended up in jail and everybody and their mama has a comment about who should
go where, what they should be doing and yada yada yada.
So today we're going to jump into that a little bit.
We're going to talk a little bit about what it means to really travel.
What's the purpose of travel?
(00:57):
What kind of travel etiquette we should have when we're moving about the world and what
we should just be aware of when we're outside of our own bubble and actually entering someone
else's bubble.
So I'm going to start off with introducing my three lovely friends.
We've got Danielle from New York.
(01:17):
We've got Keisha from New York.
And we've got Lauren from VA.
So Danielle, I'll let you introduce yourself first.
Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Okay.
Hi, my name is Danielle.
I'm born in Guyana, but raised in Long Island.
Yes, New York.
I love traveling.
(01:37):
I actually met my friend Nadine through our travels in Abu Dhabi.
We're both teachers there and we did some traveling.
Yeah, this was what?
Maybe over 10 years ago.
And we've done some traveling there.
I enjoy traveling and learning languages and learning about other people and cultures.
Yes, I met Danielle in 2010.
(01:58):
It's been 13 years.
Danielle, about to be 14 years.
Can you believe that?
It's a whole future.
I can't believe it.
Yeah, it's been a good run.
It's been a good run.
It has.
Danielle is the first person that I met in the UAE that I was like, she's so awesome.
All right, then I'm going to go over to Miss Kisa Parker.
(02:20):
Hi, everyone.
And thank you, Nadine, for having me on your podcast.
So a little bit about me.
I was born in the most wonderful Caribbean island and all of the Caribbean Sea.
Flag colors are green, black, gold, if you're familiar.
It's a little humble country full of humble country people called Jamaica.
(02:44):
But I was raised in Brooklyn, New York.
And I met Nadine five years ago in Bali.
And ever since then, we've just been hopping for...
Five.
Yes, five.
Yeah, five, right?
Sheesh.
Yeah, yeah.
Yes, it's been five.
But it just doesn't...
It seems like...
(03:04):
Yesterday?
It doesn't seem like it.
It doesn't seem like that long ago, but it seems like that long ago.
So yes, five years.
Wow.
Yeah.
And ever since then, we've been running to catch flights and my passport plate is being
flipped through because I don't look like I look in my visa photo and everything else.
(03:27):
But in my spare time, like Danielle, I don't, you know, the crisis of a black woman changing
her style, you just don't look the same in your visa photo as your passport photo as
you do in person.
But like Danielle, I enjoy learning new languages.
I enjoy fine dining in the New York City streets.
And the best country in the Caribbean is Guyana.
(03:49):
Here we go.
Talking to a Trini.
Talking to a Trini.
Because I can't remember anyone talking about Carnival in Guyana, Jamaica.
Well, we won't go there.
We won't go there.
(04:11):
And then last but not least, we have Miss Lauren.
Miss Lauren Odom, tell us about yourself.
All right.
So I am the only real American on this island.
African American.
Here we go.
I'm not from anyone's island.
(04:35):
You know, even though I tell Nadine's mom all the time, I'm a real Trini now.
Trini, Trini.
And she gets she gets a kick out of that.
But Lauren Odom, I am from Suffolk, Virginia.
We're known for Planters peanuts.
(04:56):
But I'm here in Atlanta.
I met Nadine online five years ago, almost six years ago.
Saw that she was traveling and was like, hey, can you help me get some stamps in my passport?
I think at the time I only had one and that was to the DR.
(05:17):
And now I am 25 countries in.
Oh, wow.
I'm rocking out with Traveling Black Women.
I have branded myself as the assistant brand marketing manager of Traveling Black Women.
So yeah, that's me.
(05:38):
I definitely.
What was the rest of the question?
That was it.
Oh, that's it?
Oh, OK.
Because you know, I'm ready to talk.
You know, here's here's my opportunity.
Give me a microphone and it's on.
So can I just say I'm so impressed.
25 countries in five years.
That's pretty dope.
(05:58):
Yes.
So yes, I let my first passport run out on me with like maybe three stamps in it.
It was just a waste of money.
Yeah.
But now, yeah, 20, 25 countries in, you know, I'm stamped up.
I even even have the tattoos on my on my arm.
(06:23):
I got tattoos in Nicaragua.
You know, my top six places that I visited.
So what's the top six?
I'm a world traveler now.
The top six.
All right.
I've been to Trinidad and Tobago.
Nicaragua was just a cool place to go to.
(06:47):
Like we had an amazing time in Nicaragua.
Antigua and Barbuda.
That was for my 40th Dominican Republic.
I've been there twice.
Aruba, best beach hands down.
So what's that five?
I added Atlanta because that's, you know, I put that stamp up there because I moved from
(07:10):
Suffolk, Virginia to Atlanta.
So I added that one.
So yeah, that's my that's my top six.
I feel like I'm missing one, but it's okay.
And no, Jamaica is not on my list of places to go.
I just feel like, you know, that's that's a place where every like everybody goes.
(07:32):
Like I want to I want to see places that no one on my social media timeline has been to
just so that I could come back and flex, even though I never post photos.
I just share out Nadine's post.
But yeah, Jamaica's not really on my list.
(07:52):
I'm sorry, Keisha.
I think Keisha's going to have to take us.
So that way we don't end up in the touristy areas.
Keisha's going to have to take us and like so.
Yes.
So that's a that's another thing too.
I'm glad you mentioned that, Nadine, because like one thing about like when I travel, like
I like I do I do not care for resorts.
The time that we went to the first time I went to the D.R. was on the resorts.
(08:14):
Only time we left was just to go to, you know, offsite excursions.
And then the second time when we went, I had to find the locals.
I like being in the mix with the locals because that's that's when you know you get to really
know a place and know the culture and they have the best food with the locals.
(08:39):
So I'm not if I can't be with the locals, then I don't want to visit that place.
And Jamaica is not one of those places that you can go on your own.
Yes, you can.
I'll take you to the park.
You'll be fine.
We can go with you.
But could I go and know where to go alone without you?
No.
And know all the little local spots, the little local restaurants and the bars and the clubs.
(09:03):
I think we could just like we figured out Antigua and Nicaragua and everything else.
I think we still could.
We could figure out Jamaica.
I'm not.
No, ma'am.
No, ma'am.
You just have to work in your potwa and you'll be fine.
OK, ma'am.
And then Danielle, Danielle, I take us to Guyana.
I'm going to take you out to Guyana.
(09:23):
We're going to go to go to Guyana for the week and go see the Kitechir Falls.
You know, I do want to go see those waterfalls.
Yes.
Yes.
I'm going to take you.
I'm going to go to Guyana for the Kitechir Falls.
This is sounding like a spring break trip for this year.
It could work.
Sounding like a spring break trip.
(09:46):
Yeah, we can do Guyana.
I'm with it.
I'm always with it.
I'm always with it.
Yeah.
I think that's a great segue to the purpose of travel.
Right.
What would you all say is your personal purpose for traveling?
I think for me, you know what?
Learning about different cultures and just an understanding of different people.
(10:07):
And you know what I find interesting?
You know, when I went to school out in Long Island, you know, I'm from Guyana and I never wanted to say that I was I'm from another place.
I'm from Guyana.
I remember one time we were doing an interview for something and they asked, oh, what school did your mom go to?
And I was like, Craig Government School.
They're like, Craig Government School.
Where's that?
You know, and I and it was like, oh, you're not from here.
You're from somewhere else.
I didn't want to be, you know, different or be the other.
But, you know, I found that from being from somewhere else, I have my culture to share with other people.
(10:32):
And I just like learning about other people's cultures as well.
And so for me, traveling is to learn, you know, learn about different cultures and foods and try different things and just just experience different things that I won't experience here.
You know, sitting in my apartment in New York.
One thing that I enjoy doing with this group always is going to different countries and going to the supermarket and trying the local foods and getting the local snacks.
(10:58):
So for me, you know, traveling is about learning and exploring, learning about different people, different things, learning about yourself.
Yeah. Yeah.
And I know one thing about you is that you're going to find the snacks.
You're going to find all the local snacks.
Then you know, let's go and get the snacks.
And I'm going to find all the local snacks and bring them back in my suitcase and just snack all week and take myself back, you know, to being to being wherever we were last week or, you know, the week before.
(11:24):
And I think that's so dope because it's just like, there's so many things that we do at home that are like our hobbies or interests or whatever.
But then when you take it and you go somewhere else and you're able to kind of like duplicate it or not even necessarily duplicate it, but just kind of figure out, well, what would this hobby look like if I was here?
I think that's really dope. So it's like, I like snacks. So what would this look like if I was eating snacks in Mozambique?
(11:48):
Oh, you know what? I'm going to eat all this popcorn right here. This tastes good.
Yeah, it tastes so good. And just, you know, I don't know. It just brings me, you know, it brings me so much joy. You know, it brings me so much joy.
I love that. I love that.
I think my answer would be the same as Danielle's answer is to learn and to immerse myself in another culture.
(12:09):
So like Lauren said earlier, right? I like to do whatever the locals do. I like to do wherever they go. You know, it's like, no, I live here now. So what am I going to do? What do you do?
Take me to do what you do. You know, we could we can look at the tourist attractions and that's fine. And that's all well and good.
But it's also just saying, OK, here we are on a Friday. If we live in this country on a Friday, what would we do?
And I think we had that experience when we were in Guadalupe, right? With Lauren just whipping the whip all up and down the island.
(12:36):
You know, we look something like, OK, we're going to go do this or, you know, we're going to go to this local wine bar, this local, you know, beer distillery.
We're going to do these things. And so it's just really putting yourself in that in that place and in that culture and just thinking, wow, OK, this is how they live life.
And then you get to see similarities. You get to see where there's some differences. And ultimately, you get to realize that as humans, we're all the same. Right.
(12:59):
Kind of living the same life, one of the same things, having the same desires. And really, the only thing that separates us are the borders that, you know, men kind of put in place to say this island stops here.
This country stops there. Blah, blah, blah, blah. But otherwise, we're just all human and we're all just the same kind of people just living life.
Yeah. Yeah. It's like in Mozambique when like our tour guide came back and took us to that club.
(13:24):
I was like, all right. I mean, everyone. Right. And he just randomly showed up and was like, hey, what's up?
Y'all trying to get these beers? Right. Right. Oh my gosh. It was a good time, though.
We get there and like you're on the dance floor. And I mean, like everybody is nose to toes.
(13:47):
Like the same dancing you see everywhere, you know, it was but it was a really good time and it was a great atmosphere.
And it's just like, this is what I would be doing if I lived here and it was a Friday night and I just wanted to go out and chill and have some drinks and dance a little bit.
You know, that's a really, really good point. Yeah.
(14:10):
And I think the reason for like traveling and you know what I expect when I travel is to one, to be able to disconnect because I'm always on when I'm home
and transitioning from being on site, working directly with kids or whatever to now working from home is just around the clock. You know, I mean, you know, I'm able to step away from my work here and there.
(14:40):
But it's the five o'clock now starts to blend into seven or eight and then it's like, OK, let me close my laptop and then it's time to go to bed.
And it's just it's being able to disconnect from just the work life, the adult life.
It is very ghetto being an adult. I don't know why I wanted to rush this.
(15:04):
You know, sometimes we go places and we have people that will wash our clothes, that will cook our food, that will run errands for us.
You know, I kind of come back home and I feel like I'm living.
I'm living the ghetto life of where is where is my name?
(15:27):
Where is my butler?
You know, yeah. So I mean, it's just to get away from the ghetto of everyday life here in America.
And Lauren, you hit a point of just disconnecting because I know for me, whenever usually when I went away, I'd have my phone with me.
(15:50):
I'm checking emails. I'm like, oh, what am I missing? What's going on?
What you know, what's you know, what's going on? What's going on?
That that that would constantly although, you know, I'm on vacation traveling and gives me a little bit of anxiety.
But this last vacation, you know, my phone wasn't, you know, wasn't able to connect.
And I just had to let it go and just be like, OK, well, whatever is going on, I'll deal with it when I get back.
And that just gave me just a sense of freedom and just peace, you know, like just to enjoy myself and completely just put myself in the experience and not worry about what's what's going on at work.
(16:21):
Because they let me tell you what was funny, though.
The first day or two, you were like, oh, yeah, you know, I'm just going to do work tomorrow.
I'm going to do work tomorrow. Yes.
And every day tomorrow showed up.
You just did not get any work done at all. You sip your wine.
Nothing. You told stories.
(16:43):
Nothing. And I'm just like, Daniel, I don't know why you continue to tell yourself that story.
And you know what, Lauren, when I came back, the emails were still there.
Nothing had, you know, nothing had exploded.
You know, the world. Yes.
Everything was going just fine. So that was a lesson for me.
(17:05):
It's almost like, let me disconnect. Let these people who get paid to do their jobs get paid to do their jobs.
Like, I don't have to step in to fix everybody's problem or to complete whatever task.
But it was just cool to see you disconnect.
Like, for real. No, and it felt it felt, you know, it felt good.
(17:29):
It felt good. Like, like I just felt I felt I think I felt at ease.
You know, I couldn't worry about what was going on in the emails because I couldn't see it.
It's going on. You know, so, you know, I felt at ease.
I felt very at ease this this trip in Mozambique. Right.
That's awesome. That's awesome.
Yeah. You know, one of the things that I think is really interesting about just the purpose
(17:53):
that I think we all have and maybe that's why we travel together so well is that it's that that desire to just learn to see something different.
First of all, the separate ourselves from our day to day and then see something different.
So I think that helps, too. Like, I know Keisha will come, for example, and she'll still do her work life balance thing.
But it's still kind of like I'm disrupting my flow of sitting at my apartment in New York and doing this.
(18:19):
Now I can actually like listen to some birds fly behind me and see some palm trees.
And even though I'm chopping up this email, I'm still in the midst of being in this different place.
Yeah. After the fair. Because Danielle, I think about that fish all the time.
Like the fact that we were on the beach and we asked for a menu like regular American.
Can we have a menu, please? And he brought us a tray of fish like menu.
(18:45):
Pick a fish like which one do you want? Right. Like that was what?
OK, I want that one. The one with the big eyes like.
Now, see, maybe I'm going to tell you what my first thoughts were,
because you were there trying to speak what little bit of Spanish you knew.
(19:06):
And you asked for the menu in Spanish. And when he bought out that tray of fresh fish,
my first thought was, is Nadine one man Nadine did not say, can I see a menu?
I think the correct way. And he shows up with a tray of fish.
(19:29):
That was the menu. I was confused for a moment.
Yeah. But then I realized, yes, that was the menu.
He was like, listen, I don't speak English. She is struggling to speak Spanish.
We just going to do this thing by live pictures.
And he pulled up with a tray of fish. And that was amazing.
Like that was amazing. You know, like you look back and you smile, you know,
(19:54):
and it's just you know what, Nadine, I think it's very important when you kind of equate
traveling to being a guest in someone else's country.
And I kind of look at it as a guest in someone's home.
For example, growing up, when you came into our house, you took your shoes off at the door.
You know what I mean? So when you come in and you see the shoes lined up, you know,
and it's take your shoes off. So, you know, I wouldn't go in someone's house where they're saying,
(20:16):
oh, take your shoes off. I say, no, I'm going to wear my shoes in the house because in my house,
we wear shoes through the house. And this is what I'm going to do in your house.
You know, so that's how I look at it. Like, you know, the rules of, you know, when you visit someone,
the rules of their house, that's their home. So that's how I look at it at travel.
Like that's their country, you know, and these are their rules.
And this is what I'm going to do as a guest in their country.
I think that's a great analogy. That's perfect.
(20:37):
And then also to that and think about it, especially if you're from the Caribbean, right?
And if you go into somebody's house, you get that speech ahead of time.
Don't ask for nothing. You're not thirsty. You're hungry. You're not this.
You know, you have those rules, right? And so you leave knowing that when you go to someone else's house,
you better be on your best behavior and you better not embarrass your parents and you better not do this.
(21:00):
There's these core set of rules that you understand.
And then even when you enter into that other person's space, you're observing enough, right?
We're so hyper village.
Well, you know, we're just in this hyper focus mode that we're like, we're observing.
OK, the dudes are at the door. I leave my shoes at the door.
I'm going to do this too. Oh, this is how you greet someone.
(21:23):
So, OK, I'm going to make that greeting to you.
You know, the aunties I have that are not my aunties, but that was the greeting. Right.
So then you just did the greeting.
So, you know, it's just so apropos to realize that you're a guest.
And then when you're a guest, when you're a guest, you abide by these rules.
You respect you honor.
You know, you want to make sure that those who invited you into their space feel happy that they did and not regret that they extended the invitation for you to come.
(21:48):
Absolutely. Absolutely. And I feel like both of those are such great examples.
You know, so when I see all these things popping up with, you know, people being upset about, you know,
don't go to this place because they don't allow this and don't go to this place because they don't.
I'm like, well, one, yeah, you do have to do your research to see what is your threshold.
Right. Because maybe your threshold, maybe you have funny looking feet and you don't want to take your feet off your shoes off in nobody's house.
(22:10):
Maybe maybe maybe it's your individual problem.
And it's fine. You know what I mean?
Maybe that's your thing. But if that's your individual thing, be aware of it so that you can make your individual decision as to whether or not you are capable of leaving
that part of your comfort zone. It's not a, you know, all these people are so horrible because they make you take off your shoes.
(22:32):
It's like, no, understand, have that self-awareness to know that maybe this is something that you just cannot do.
Right. But at the end of the day, as a guest, you cannot go into somebody's house stomping around just because that's what you do in your house.
Like it just it just does not work. And I think that was a perfect analogy for everything that you all keep saying that this is a Caribbean household type.
(22:54):
No, if you were raised by a black woman in general,
Fair enough, fair enough.
All right. All right.
Keisha, because growing up, my mother would take us to her friend's house and she would tell us, don't do not ask for anything to eat or to drink.
(23:17):
And these people are having a full 12 course meal and my stomach is growling.
But I dare not ask, even if they say you want something to eat, no ma'am.
No, no thank you. No thank you.
No thank you.
Stomach is eating my back. And I knew not to say yes to can I get a plate?
(23:46):
Not at all. So that's hilarious.
But what happens is I feel like instead of people being self aware about their individual needs, they then start spreading these ideals that, oh, this place is a bad place to be or, you know, don't go over to that person's house or whatnot or in the terms of, you know, switching it over to countries.
(24:08):
Don't go to that country. Don't go to this country.
And it's just like, but that was your individual thing. That doesn't mean that this whole population of people are just completely, you know, write them off the map type of people like, oh no, don't ever go over there.
I mean, Danielle and Danielle, you live there longer than I did. I lived there three and a half years, almost four years. Danielle, how long did you live in Abu Dhabi?
(24:31):
I was there four years. Four years. Okay.
Yeah. And I feel like, yeah, there were some things now it's not perfect. Just like America's not perfect. Just like no country is perfect. It wasn't perfect. But just the ways that you see things described to me is just so basic where it's just like, there are just basic things to respect.
Like, hey, you don't do certain things, certain ways. And that's it. That's all it comes down to.
(24:54):
And just respect. As a guest in the country for four years, I respected your rules. Like at the schools, right? Working in the schools, they required you to dress a certain way. Yeah. Okay. This is what's required in your schools.
This is what your teachers do. This is what your teleminators do to work in your schools. Okay. Fine. I used to wear a bias and I liked it. They were free flowing. They were comfortable.
(25:20):
You didn't have to worry, think too much about what I was going to put on in the morning, throw on my abaya and keep it moving.
But that, and it was kind of like a respect for the school. I was a guest in the school. So I'm going to respect your cultures and your way of life. Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, right. So what would y'all say outside of like the whole Dubai and respect debacle that we've been seeing lately? What would y'all say is your number one, I guess, piece of advice for travel etiquette?
(25:55):
One, if I didn't know, I would definitely look to join like online communities such as traveling black women on Facebook. You know, and just pose the question of, hey, I'm looking to travel to such and such place during such and such time.
You know, what can I expect? And there is going to be a few people that will just hop in the comments, you know, just to be able to provide like places to stay, what to eat, what to do, but also be able to provide informational, you know, what not to do, what to expect when you get there.
(26:40):
A lot of times when we when we go out of the country, you know, I'm looking up before even going, I'm looking up.
Will I be able to drive in this country and what do I need to be able to drive and what are the laws around, you know, me renting a car? And so I try to, you know, do the research on all of those things so that way when we get to wherever we're going, not only am I safe, but the people that are with me are safe as well.
(27:12):
So thanks, girl.
But did you die.
You know, I have come back.
(27:33):
And Nadine is always the first one in the first seat, talking about somebody's driving.
I'm very appreciative.
It complains the most but hey we all need a friend like that we all need that one friend.
I just want to say what Lauren said about research. I think that's important, you know, like you said, there's all these so much resources at your disposal, you know, there are these groups, there are these guides, plug traveling black women.
(28:12):
Do your research, know where you're going, what are the rules and you know regulations of the country you're going to.
I don't want to say there's no excuse but you know, the resources are there.
No, but you're right.
(28:33):
And here's the thing while you're doing your research, be curious. Yeah, and not just my soul, because it's so easy to say oh that's what they do. Oh that's how they live. That can never be me. Well okay if you want to go into their country for a particular moment
and period of time that is going to be you.
Also know the authorities right. So be curious, don't be judgmental, ask random questions just just think of it through and especially if you're going to a culture where there's probably a different dominant religion, or a different kind of stance and political
(29:06):
ideology, whether they're more conservative, less conservative, we want to know all these things and you know don't don't don't do these favorite flagrant files like so for example you know a country doesn't appreciate non military members were fatigued.
Don't don't wear that's not the time to wear your army fatigue hoodie through the airport.
(29:27):
It's not a very good welcome. Don't say oh I'm not going to be the one you you you might be the example for the day. And because you spent your money.
Because you got on a plane, because you packed the bag because you did all these things, you want to be able to go there you want people to enjoy yourself have a good time and come back and say you know what this is the great experience I've had this
(29:48):
is what I did. So get curious, not judgmental, learn, you know we're in the information age there's so much information in our fingertips, and just kind of be just resourceful like Lauren said like Danielle said look at the guides, Travel Back
Woman guides. Look at you know the Travel Back Woman Facebook page and you know there's some other Facebook pages which we support you can look at those two, and just do a Google search, ask Siri, ask Alessa.
(30:13):
You know there's so many ways to figure it out.
So true like I feel like there are so many resources out there now like back in 2010, when I was first moving to Abu Dhabi like everybody thought that I was getting ready to be you know swept up in some kind of like sex cult and they were like no this is not real.
But the resources were limited, you know, so it was a valid concern, but me having the same mindset then that I do now was like no I'm gonna go try it and see what happens you know.
(30:46):
And it turned out to be amazing it turned out to be one of the best experiences of my life, right.
And at the same time I did exactly what you say, Keisha, I stay curious right because I had no real knowledge of Islam or Muslim culture outside of Newark, New Jersey, like Newark, New Jersey.
Yeah, you know you heard about American and you heard about all these different things, but it was nation of Islam so it was a very different type of approach to Islam, but I got there.
(31:16):
And of course everyone's like oh you know the Middle East like it's going to be like this and 9-11 just happened and all of this.
And there's this fear that you're you kind of like get stirred up in you and then you get there and it's like oh they're offering me tea.
And they're curious about my hair and you know we're having these conversations, oh Ms. Nadine.
(31:37):
You know and it's just this whole different thing that you just don't you did not know to expect that is nothing like what people have like made you fear.
So that be curious is really really like write that down like be curious you know like really be curious about what it is that you can possibly expect because even if you do the research and you find out you ask the questions and you find out this and you find out that there is still this possibility that you get there.
(32:05):
And what you expect is still not what actually happens for you in that moment and without that curiosity you end up kind of being like oh it's not what I expected it to be well stay curious because maybe you'll see something else stay open maybe you'll see something else.
You know so I like that.
That was good. I'll see you girl. That was good.
(32:32):
I think one of the one of the biggest things for me with travel etiquette.
There's also something that needs to be set for how you show up how you present yourself how you engage with people you know doing little things simple things like learning how to say thank you and please and hello in the local language, like just little things that say hey I'm not just here to observe
culture and go. I'm really here to engage with you and even though I might say to my friends that I want to learn, I want you to know too, that I want to learn from you that I want to be a part of your culture and I feel like when we were in Mozambique, a couple
(33:05):
weeks ago that was last week. We were in Mozambique last week. I feel like we did a really good job of that of being like hey, we're not just here to just, you know, ride on these four wheelers and see what you got and go home like we want to talk, we want to engage
you want to see what you got going on over here we want to have these conversations. And I think that made such an impact you know like people were excited to talk to us excited to connect with us, and that felt really good.
(33:31):
Like I came home like, yeah, really good.
I wanted to put William in my suitcase and bring him.
I wanted to do that. Yes.
There are a lot of successful individuals in our group that are doing amazing things in their day to day lives and I think that,
(34:01):
when we go to these other countries we see like hey we could actually invest in our own properties and tap into the individuals that that live in that community to actually work for us but also make them business people themselves.
(34:22):
And you know it just, it just drops that that idea on me every time that we travel like, I need to come back and buy some land and just move here.
And then just employ the locals.
You know, since I can't bring them home, I just should just move there with them.
(34:45):
You know, you say that, and it reminds me of one day when we were, I guess, going into town to the market. And you know, one person on this on this podcast who shall remain nameless.
There was a young girl on the roadway selling cassava leaves, and she was selling them for 20 in my accounts. And so, you know, the young girl approached, and you know, the person said oh, how much, and she said 20.
(35:10):
She gave her the 20, then the young girl hand over the cassava leaves and she said no no no don't want them.
You know someone someone else, and just the joy. Right that overcame that young lady, just the joy that here here it was someone just gave her 20 bucks, or 20 of your dollars, and just, you know, it was just this.
I hadn't seen joy like that in a long time because sometimes, you know, being the states you don't get your PS five, you angry, you may, you know, you want to light somebody up.
(35:40):
But here it is 20 medicals right which was like a what like a dollar or something for us, or maybe more or less I don't recall, but just the joy and the excitement and then not only that she's with another young lady.
And they were, I know they were making their plans to go buy some chips go buy some something to go do something because they were flying about what they were going to do with this 20 dollars but they were just so overjoyed.
So, you know, right in being immersed in someone's culture. Right and I made this point before maybe and you're not just there to take you're just not there to stop and see and just kind of gone, but you're there to give right you're giving up yourself.
(36:13):
You're giving up your substance you're giving up your resources, and you're in your blessing someone with the memory you're blessing someone with this kind of experience to say wow, this person just gave me this and for them it could have been to us it might seem
insignificant, but for them it was like the most magnanimous thing that you could have done to make their day.
And I think that's also a blessing and a beauty about traveling, not what you could just get from being in that space but also what you can give, and you can leave there for people to remember to hold on to.
(36:44):
So true.
So true.
And in Mozambique in particular because people haven't really been speaking about Mozambique that much like it's still just kind of getting on the map in terms of travel and tourism and things like that. Like, most of the time they see white faces doing this you know they see
white faces coming to be tourists and things like that. So to see like, it almost feels like family like families come in and say hey what's up like you know it's Christmas, I don't know I didn't maybe at Christmas not a great example,
(37:16):
but it's just like, you know, this family is coming to say like what's up, and we're not just there with these expectations about what they can do for us because we're on vacation but it's like, it's a win win it's a mutual situation where I'm looking at y'all and like y'all look like me
and what you need because I want to help you know, you know, and it's, it just feels good it just feels like a impromptu family reunion, you know, and we're going through the airport a couple times and then another guy in our group like,
(37:45):
the guy who was checking the passports I was like, that looked like your cousin, you know what I mean? And he's looking around and he's like oh yeah he does kind of look like me you know, I think those moments are amazing because it's like, it's just connection.
Yeah, yeah.
But it's also the same when we were in Cartagena, when we were going, we were walking out, walking throughout the streets and every now and then you encounter someone. And I forget we're walking down some sidewalk and there was this young black lady looking out through a window and we kind of looked at her and she just smiled like, oh my color, my color.
(38:19):
Yes, so happy to see us and to see that we look the same and, you know, we may not speak the same language but there was kind of just that kind of semblance that look you're like me and I'm like you and, and we share this kind of like this common thing right be our skin tone, but this is what we share
and this is what connects us and it was just you know one of those other like heartwarming feelings of travel and what travel can do. Yeah, I would agree with that.
(38:49):
Absolutely. The guys that were running through rapping like I don't know what they were saying to this day.
They were just so excited to see us and you know they were rapping and talking to us and it was a connection. Yeah, it was pretty neat. It was pretty neat. It was like one of those moments where it's just like, now you're with us physically traveling and physically getting to know one another and just being in different spaces,
(39:15):
whether it be Columbia because Columbia has got plenty of black people speak in Spanish, you know or Panama, or right there in Mozambique like all of these different places where you have opportunities to see yourself mirrored in other cultures I think it's pretty dope.
You know, yeah, exactly. Well y'all. Would anybody have any final thoughts about the purpose of travel travel etiquette, what people should know if they're traveling if they're starting to travel novice travelers season travelers.
(39:49):
So, what people should know is is that it is okay to plan your next trip.
Don't feel like you're, you're, you know, you're not enjoying the moment, it is just that you are looking to continue the moment. Yeah, fair enough, and all the fields that come along with it so it's okay to plan your travel while you are your next vacation while you are on your current vacation.
(40:30):
I'm writing that down. I'm writing that down as a note.
Yeah, well my advice, along with similar to Lawrence and well not similar but, you know, always bring the extra bag to bring back the goodies and
(40:52):
travel with a friend or travel with a friend who has a larger bag.
Inside of it.
And he has a duty free in the airport click click click click.
Yes.
I would second that I would say definitely try the snacks in a different country like wherever you travel like just to double back on what Danielle said like if you go somewhere, you have got to try the snacks like the cheese, the cheese curls may not taste the same
(41:28):
but it's worth a try you know the new get like what did we get it was like a, it was a bar that it's not Snickers but it tastes like a Snickers but it tastes kind of better than Snickers it tastes like Snickers made with brown sugar.
So it's actually pretty good, because I mean I feel like most things that are made abroad are made with natural ingredients as opposed to here where it's just like,
(41:49):
this is right for me. Red number five. Yeah, blue number six.
Yes, try the snacks, try all the snacks.
Yeah, yeah, be a good guest, be a good guest in another country. Be a good guest. Yes, absolutely.
(42:11):
When you're packing your swimwear, when you're packing according to Lauren your tourist outfit.
When you're packing for the itinerary, do not forget to pack your patience.
As much as travel can be fun, it also can be a little bit tedious especially when you're trying to enter into someone's country, and your passport photo don't look like your visa photo, and you show up with braids in your hair, but your photo is a curly afro of you from like five years ago.
(42:44):
You know they're going to flip through your passport pages a couple of times and don't get nervous, don't get concerned. Just be cool. Just be gracious and answer whatever questions they have and you know keep the neck rolled to them and just say yes sir, no ma'am and that kind of thing.
Just remember you're going to have this experience, you're going to have this experience. And because you purpose in your heart, you intent in your heart to have this great time, there's going to be obstacles that come up to take away from them.
(43:14):
So pack your patience. To just kind of navigate those moments when you know something, some opposition, force or whatever is just trying to steal the joy that you just had, steal the joy that you're about to have.
And remember, to get through this moment, and I'm going to get to the next moment. So pack lots of patience, a big bag of patience, like a whole big bag.
(43:35):
Right. Yeah, and I want to say I think that's why I enjoy traveling with this group so much, because you know what, traveling, things are going to happen.
And I feel like you have your plans of how things are going to go and you get somewhere or maybe the excursions cancel, the excursions different than you expected, or maybe you know there's going to be something that doesn't go according to your plans.
(43:57):
And I think with this group, like, you know, when that happens, we don't sit around and mope and whine and you know like get, we're just like okay, you know, let's let's regroup, and let's go on to the next thing.
And you know, positive vibes right because when you're, when you're in another country and you know like you're far away from home and you know you don't, I personally don't like traveling with with negative vibes, you know, or with negative.
(44:21):
You want you want positivity, you know, like you're going to be here together for, you know, X amount of days. Let's keep it light, a bit positive, let's keep it moving.
So that's why I, you know, like like Keisha was saying, you know, pack your patience. I love that.
And, you know, like, you know, when we were in, sometimes you're going through customs, you know, the customs agents there, they're all day you know they're seeing people come through and, you know, like, you know, and they have their own stressors probably, but you know if they pull you aside to look at something or ask you a question, like, yes ma'am, no sir.
(44:53):
Keep it moving, keep it moving. Yeah, you're absolutely right about that because making the scene is not going to help. Right. Like we've seen that.
We've seen that in the news now that it's not helping that's putting people in jail, you know, and getting overly upset is going to cloud your vacation. You know, like, the logistics of moving in from airport to airport is is definitely going to be difficult.
(45:15):
Like I would say even in Mozambique, I felt like everyone was super sweet like all the locals like they were just like kind or whatnot, just mild mannered soft spoken, but those last two ladies at the airport that looked at my passport, they were not about that life.
I don't know where they were from, but they were not about that soft spoken life. Yes.
(45:36):
I mean, they grabbed my passport up, stamped it and sent me on my way and I'm over there like, because I mean, we just spent what seven days there so I'm over there like, hey, how are you?
We're not trying to hear that. They were not trying to hear that. What does it do me to be upset by that? I was like, oh, okay, well they're not for it today. Let me get my passport and go.
(46:01):
Okay, thank you. We don't want it to be on your way trying to transit home that your eye roll or you're like pointing finger at someone or you inadvertently or probably very much intentionally tapping someone and you up in prison.
Right.
We don't know their due process laws. Okay, we don't know if they got a bail thing system going on.
(46:23):
So we don't want to find out. And what we definitely want to do is have to go on Instagram talking about, okay, we're going to set up the GoFundMe for so and so because you're in jail and we got to get a foreign attorney and do it.
Right.
You just have to make the experience or you're about to have this amazing experience. Have the experience and check the app too. It's not, it's just not going to help you. It's just not going to get you to where you want to go.
(46:47):
Right. And I think the last thing that I do address because even when things don't go well, we can laugh about it. You know, a week later, a few days later, laughing.
Oh, remember when the experience, you know, like you said, like it's part of the chat part of the travel.
That is so true. That is so true because when Lauren had us end up in a ditch in Antigua and the tire was flat.
(47:17):
And we did not end up in a ditch. Tell me, tell me. The tire went flat and me and Kiesha came home and we was going to have to push. I like my version of the story better.
When I was on the triple, we were pushing Mozambique, pushing that van and we got through the ditch.
(47:39):
Being stuck in the sand like what? We were 30 deep in a 10 passenger van.
And I think three of the four wheels were caught, were buried in the sand. And then we had to walk on a sand silt road.
(48:00):
We had to wait about, I don't know, another 10 minutes to get to our dinner reservation or whatever that was. But immediately we were people of a different disposition.
And they were like, I don't know, I don't know, maybe they can bring us out here. We walking in no sand.
We took out our phones. We turned on the flashlight. We were singing songs. We were doing all sorts of things. And then we had an amazing meal.
(48:26):
Imagine, imagine, we're like thorough faced at that experience. We couldn't enjoy our meal. That's true.
And I'm just having an amazing story to tell. Yes. We enjoyed our meal. We fed some cats. They enjoyed their meal too.
I completely forgot that Daye was trying to feed those cats.
(48:47):
I did think of some food when nobody was looking. I saw a big old piece of chicken.
Daye, it seemed like you need to refund me my money for the food that you fed the cats.
Oh no. Oh no. But no, that's a perfect example of being adaptable and like making everything fun.
(49:12):
Like this is hilarious. I cannot believe we got stuck in the sand.
And now we got to march to this restaurant in the dark with this flashlights.
But they say, you know, travel makes you a storyteller. And that is one of the stories from this trip.
But Nisha, I want you to share your story of going through Dubai with your 18 different hairstyles.
(49:40):
It's an issue that only a black woman can have. Only a black woman can have.
Okay, I'm going to give you the abbreviated version. Okay. So because I traveled with a Jamaican passport, I had to get a visa for Dubai.
And so my visa photo is of my hair right now. You know, like my curly afro with, you know, this like orangey, well not orange, but blondish orangey color hair on top.
(50:09):
Now my passport photo is of me, my face is a little fuller then because I had a couple extra pounds.
So it was me with this like straight bob looking like very Jamaican. And in that photo, you'll know what it means.
You know, you know, when you're an immigrant taking a photo, you just have that look like your face is straight. There's no smile.
Right. Right. A faint, a faint touch of Vaseline on the lips. Not too much. Not too much.
(50:36):
But because you got to be tough in the passport photo, you just have to do it.
So okay, it's something I showed you to buy with the braids in my hair. Right. And I'm going to braids a little up and a little bun.
And I'm walking through like, okay. I think the rest of y'all have already gotten through. You got your badge. You're already shopping and duty free.
So I'm standing in line. And this is always when I know I have to start praying because they look at the first page and they look at me.
(51:02):
Look at the visa photo. They look at me. They flip through a couple more pages. They look at me.
And then someone starts speaking in a different language. I'm like, oh, here it is. Here it is. And so then he was like, who's this?
And I was like, oh, that's me. That's not you. I was like, no, it is me. Then he looked to another photo. Who's this?
And in that photo, I had my short afro curly hair, but it's all black. He's like, well, who's this? That's also me.
(51:28):
He's like, that's not you. And he's like, go to the back. Go to the back.
And I was like, oh my gosh, I'm about to be locked up. I'm about to go to jail. They want to move me back on a plane. I don't know what's going to happen.
So then the line in the back was so long. And I finally got to the front and there was a woman standing next to me.
And so I don't know where her issue was with her passport, but, you know, she says something to the guy and then she started to over talk him.
(51:54):
And he was like, I said, shut up. And I was like, oh, that's a lot of hair.
And he wasn't even talking to me. But I knew that was enough for me.
Like, yes, sir. No, sir. Had not. And they scared my eyes like 50 million times.
And they flipped through the photos again. Who's this? And who's this? And who's this?
So now I have my hair braids up in a bun. I took them out of the bun. I pulled them back.
(52:17):
I did all sorts of things so they can realize it's like it's really me.
And so they scared my ass one last time. They call somebody from the back and I'm like, Lord Jesus, I just need you to come help me right now.
All my friends that left me and I don't want to get on a plane to go back to the States. Just let them know it's me.
(52:39):
So finally, one guy kind of flipped through the photos again. Who's this? It's me.
Who's this? It's also me. And then they stamped something. They made a phone call. They're like, OK, all right.
But then leaving Dubai to come back to the States, I got pulled out of the line because they didn't think it was me.
So clearly, going forward, I decided my passport is about to expire.
(53:02):
So I think I'm getting my hair done with some braids. That's my traveling style. Yes, the braids.
I remember standing at a carousel with your bag like, where's Keisha? Oh my goodness.
Good times. So good times. And like, you know what? By the time you reconnected with all of us, it was like Danielle said,
(53:29):
y'all they cooked me in the back. They didn't believe who I was. All right, let's go on with the vacation. And we just kept it rolling.
You know, it was like, get me home now. I hate it here.
Oh, man. Yeah, I think that's what I love about this group too, Danielle.
(53:51):
Like the travel etiquette. Is that a word? The travel etiquette. Yeah, amongst us all, I feel like is this like par for the course.
It's right on point. So I appreciate it. Yeah, because hollering and getting mad and screaming, it's not going to get you anything.
(54:12):
It's not. Well, guys, I really thank y'all for this conversation today. Like I enjoy talking to you guys on a regular day anyway.
You know, when we go on vacations, we have such a good time. We just laugh and kiki. And you know, half the time it might be other than social media,
(54:33):
maybe weeks or months before we have a full blown conversation like this. And every time we connect, it's just like we never left.
You know what I mean? So I love it. And I'm just grateful for y'all. I'm grateful for y'all travel style.
Thank you. Yeah. Y'all. Thank y'all so much for this amazing conversation. I just absolutely love it. Absolutely love it. Absolutely love y'all. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Any last words?
(55:04):
Thank you for having us. You know, I actually my my sleepy self wanted to go to bed at eight o'clock, but could not miss out on this opportunity to one, catch up with my good people.
But to just talk about our travels and all of the good times that we've had traveling together. So thank you, Nene. Thank you, traveling black women.
(55:32):
Don't forget to follow us on all social media accounts. Traveling black women on Facebook, TikTok, Twitter or X, Instagram, threads everywhere.
Thank you, Brand Manager. Yes, I suck at everything you say. Thank you for, you know, creating this platform for, you know, women, black women to connect and communicate and, you know, get get more of us out there traveling.
(56:03):
Well, thanks, guys. Thanks for your support. Thanks for always being there. Thanks for always rocking your shirts. Sharing the post, you know, just being present, showing up the way that you guys have. I love you guys.
We love you too. I love you too.
Thanks, guys.
Welcome to the Traveling Black Women podcast.
(00:12):
This is episode two of season two and I have three of my favorite people in the world with
me on the line to talk about travel etiquette today.
So I know recently you've been seeing some things in the news about travelers going to
places like Dubai and not really having the best time, right?
(00:35):
Because things have gone wrong.
They've ended up in jail and everybody and their mama has a comment about who should
go where, what they should be doing and yada yada yada.
So today we're going to jump into that a little bit.
We're going to talk a little bit about what it means to really travel.
What's the purpose of travel?
(00:57):
What kind of travel etiquette we should have when we're moving about the world and what
we should just be aware of when we're outside of our own bubble and actually entering someone
else's bubble.
So I'm going to start off with introducing my three lovely friends.
We've got Danielle from New York.
(01:17):
We've got Keisha from New York.
And we've got Lauren from VA.
So Danielle, I'll let you introduce yourself first.
Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Okay.
Hi, my name is Danielle.
I'm born in Guyana, but raised in Long Island.
Yes, New York.
I love traveling.
(01:37):
I actually met my friend Nadine through our travels in Abu Dhabi.
We're both teachers there and we did some traveling.
Yeah, this was what?
Maybe over 10 years ago.
And we've done some traveling there.
I enjoy traveling and learning languages and learning about other people and cultures.
Yes, I met Danielle in 2010.
(01:58):
It's been 13 years.
Danielle, about to be 14 years.
Can you believe that?
It's a whole future.
I can't believe it.
Yeah, it's been a good run.
It's been a good run.
It has.
Danielle is the first person that I met in the UAE that I was like, she's so awesome.
All right, then I'm going to go over to Miss Kisa Parker.
(02:20):
Hi, everyone.
And thank you, Nadine, for having me on your podcast.
So a little bit about me.
I was born in the most wonderful Caribbean island and all of the Caribbean Sea.
Flag colors are green, black, gold, if you're familiar.
It's a little humble country full of humble country people called Jamaica.
(02:44):
But I was raised in Brooklyn, New York.
And I met Nadine five years ago in Bali.
And ever since then, we've just been hopping for...
Five.
Yes, five.
Yeah, five, right?
Sheesh.
Yeah, yeah.
Yes, it's been five.
But it just doesn't...
It seems like...
(03:04):
Yesterday?
It doesn't seem like it.
It doesn't seem like that long ago, but it seems like that long ago.
So yes, five years.
Wow.
Yeah.
And ever since then, we've been running to catch flights and my passport plate is being
flipped through because I don't look like I look in my visa photo and everything else.
(03:27):
But in my spare time, like Danielle, I don't, you know, the crisis of a black woman changing
her style, you just don't look the same in your visa photo as your passport photo as
you do in person.
But like Danielle, I enjoy learning new languages.
I enjoy fine dining in the New York City streets.
And the best country in the Caribbean is Guyana.
(03:49):
Here we go.
Talking to a Trini.
Talking to a Trini.
Because I can't remember anyone talking about Carnival in Guyana, Jamaica.
Well, we won't go there.
We won't go there.
(04:11):
And then last but not least, we have Miss Lauren.
Miss Lauren Odom, tell us about yourself.
All right.
So I am the only real American on this island.
African American.
Here we go.
I'm not from anyone's island.
(04:35):
You know, even though I tell Nadine's mom all the time, I'm a real Trini now.
Trini, Trini.
And she gets she gets a kick out of that.
But Lauren Odom, I am from Suffolk, Virginia.
We're known for Planters peanuts.
(04:56):
But I'm here in Atlanta.
I met Nadine online five years ago, almost six years ago.
Saw that she was traveling and was like, hey, can you help me get some stamps in my passport?
I think at the time I only had one and that was to the DR.
(05:17):
And now I am 25 countries in.
Oh, wow.
I'm rocking out with Traveling Black Women.
I have branded myself as the assistant brand marketing manager of Traveling Black Women.
So yeah, that's me.
(05:38):
I definitely.
What was the rest of the question?
That was it.
Oh, that's it?
Oh, OK.
Because you know, I'm ready to talk.
You know, here's here's my opportunity.
Give me a microphone and it's on.
So can I just say I'm so impressed.
25 countries in five years.
That's pretty dope.
(05:58):
Yes.
So yes, I let my first passport run out on me with like maybe three stamps in it.
It was just a waste of money.
Yeah.
But now, yeah, 20, 25 countries in, you know, I'm stamped up.
I even even have the tattoos on my on my arm.
(06:23):
I got tattoos in Nicaragua.
You know, my top six places that I visited.
So what's the top six?
I'm a world traveler now.
The top six.
All right.
I've been to Trinidad and Tobago.
Nicaragua was just a cool place to go to.
(06:47):
Like we had an amazing time in Nicaragua.
Antigua and Barbuda.
That was for my 40th Dominican Republic.
I've been there twice.
Aruba, best beach hands down.
So what's that five?
I added Atlanta because that's, you know, I put that stamp up there because I moved from
(07:10):
Suffolk, Virginia to Atlanta.
So I added that one.
So yeah, that's my that's my top six.
I feel like I'm missing one, but it's okay.
And no, Jamaica is not on my list of places to go.
I just feel like, you know, that's that's a place where every like everybody goes.
(07:32):
Like I want to I want to see places that no one on my social media timeline has been to
just so that I could come back and flex, even though I never post photos.
I just share out Nadine's post.
But yeah, Jamaica's not really on my list.
(07:52):
I'm sorry, Keisha.
I think Keisha's going to have to take us.
So that way we don't end up in the touristy areas.
Keisha's going to have to take us and like so.
Yes.
So that's a that's another thing too.
I'm glad you mentioned that, Nadine, because like one thing about like when I travel, like
I like I do I do not care for resorts.
The time that we went to the first time I went to the D.R. was on the resorts.
(08:14):
Only time we left was just to go to, you know, offsite excursions.
And then the second time when we went, I had to find the locals.
I like being in the mix with the locals because that's that's when you know you get to really
know a place and know the culture and they have the best food with the locals.
(08:39):
So I'm not if I can't be with the locals, then I don't want to visit that place.
And Jamaica is not one of those places that you can go on your own.
Yes, you can.
I'll take you to the park.
You'll be fine.
We can go with you.
But could I go and know where to go alone without you?
No.
And know all the little local spots, the little local restaurants and the bars and the clubs.
(09:03):
I think we could just like we figured out Antigua and Nicaragua and everything else.
I think we still could.
We could figure out Jamaica.
I'm not.
No, ma'am.
No, ma'am.
You just have to work in your potwa and you'll be fine.
OK, ma'am.
And then Danielle, Danielle, I take us to Guyana.
I'm going to take you out to Guyana.
(09:23):
We're going to go to go to Guyana for the week and go see the Kitechir Falls.
You know, I do want to go see those waterfalls.
Yes.
Yes.
I'm going to take you.
I'm going to go to Guyana for the Kitechir Falls.
This is sounding like a spring break trip for this year.
It could work.
Sounding like a spring break trip.
(09:46):
Yeah, we can do Guyana.
I'm with it.
I'm always with it.
I'm always with it.
Yeah.
I think that's a great segue to the purpose of travel.
Right.
What would you all say is your personal purpose for traveling?
I think for me, you know what?
Learning about different cultures and just an understanding of different people.
(10:07):
And you know what I find interesting?
You know, when I went to school out in Long Island, you know, I'm from Guyana and I never wanted to say that I was I'm from another place.
I'm from Guyana.
I remember one time we were doing an interview for something and they asked, oh, what school did your mom go to?
And I was like, Craig Government School.
They're like, Craig Government School.
Where's that?
You know, and I and it was like, oh, you're not from here.
You're from somewhere else.
I didn't want to be, you know, different or be the other.
But, you know, I found that from being from somewhere else, I have my culture to share with other people.
(10:32):
And I just like learning about other people's cultures as well.
And so for me, traveling is to learn, you know, learn about different cultures and foods and try different things and just just experience different things that I won't experience here.
You know, sitting in my apartment in New York.
One thing that I enjoy doing with this group always is going to different countries and going to the supermarket and trying the local foods and getting the local snacks.
(10:58):
So for me, you know, traveling is about learning and exploring, learning about different people, different things, learning about yourself.
Yeah. Yeah.
And I know one thing about you is that you're going to find the snacks.
You're going to find all the local snacks.
Then you know, let's go and get the snacks.
And I'm going to find all the local snacks and bring them back in my suitcase and just snack all week and take myself back, you know, to being to being wherever we were last week or, you know, the week before.
(11:24):
And I think that's so dope because it's just like, there's so many things that we do at home that are like our hobbies or interests or whatever.
But then when you take it and you go somewhere else and you're able to kind of like duplicate it or not even necessarily duplicate it, but just kind of figure out, well, what would this hobby look like if I was here?
I think that's really dope. So it's like, I like snacks. So what would this look like if I was eating snacks in Mozambique?
(11:48):
Oh, you know what? I'm going to eat all this popcorn right here. This tastes good.
Yeah, it tastes so good. And just, you know, I don't know. It just brings me, you know, it brings me so much joy. You know, it brings me so much joy.
I love that. I love that.
I think my answer would be the same as Danielle's answer is to learn and to immerse myself in another culture.
(12:09):
So like Lauren said earlier, right? I like to do whatever the locals do. I like to do wherever they go. You know, it's like, no, I live here now. So what am I going to do? What do you do?
Take me to do what you do. You know, we could we can look at the tourist attractions and that's fine. And that's all well and good.
But it's also just saying, OK, here we are on a Friday. If we live in this country on a Friday, what would we do?
And I think we had that experience when we were in Guadalupe, right? With Lauren just whipping the whip all up and down the island.
(12:36):
You know, we look something like, OK, we're going to go do this or, you know, we're going to go to this local wine bar, this local, you know, beer distillery.
We're going to do these things. And so it's just really putting yourself in that in that place and in that culture and just thinking, wow, OK, this is how they live life.
And then you get to see similarities. You get to see where there's some differences. And ultimately, you get to realize that as humans, we're all the same. Right.
(12:59):
Kind of living the same life, one of the same things, having the same desires. And really, the only thing that separates us are the borders that, you know, men kind of put in place to say this island stops here.
This country stops there. Blah, blah, blah, blah. But otherwise, we're just all human and we're all just the same kind of people just living life.
Yeah. Yeah. It's like in Mozambique when like our tour guide came back and took us to that club.
(13:24):
I was like, all right. I mean, everyone. Right. And he just randomly showed up and was like, hey, what's up?
Y'all trying to get these beers? Right. Right. Oh my gosh. It was a good time, though.
We get there and like you're on the dance floor. And I mean, like everybody is nose to toes.
(13:47):
Like the same dancing you see everywhere, you know, it was but it was a really good time and it was a great atmosphere.
And it's just like, this is what I would be doing if I lived here and it was a Friday night and I just wanted to go out and chill and have some drinks and dance a little bit.
You know, that's a really, really good point. Yeah.
(14:10):
And I think the reason for like traveling and you know what I expect when I travel is to one, to be able to disconnect because I'm always on when I'm home
and transitioning from being on site, working directly with kids or whatever to now working from home is just around the clock. You know, I mean, you know, I'm able to step away from my work here and there.
(14:40):
But it's the five o'clock now starts to blend into seven or eight and then it's like, OK, let me close my laptop and then it's time to go to bed.
And it's just it's being able to disconnect from just the work life, the adult life.
It is very ghetto being an adult. I don't know why I wanted to rush this.
(15:04):
You know, sometimes we go places and we have people that will wash our clothes, that will cook our food, that will run errands for us.
You know, I kind of come back home and I feel like I'm living.
I'm living the ghetto life of where is where is my name?
(15:27):
Where is my butler?
You know, yeah. So I mean, it's just to get away from the ghetto of everyday life here in America.
And Lauren, you hit a point of just disconnecting because I know for me, whenever usually when I went away, I'd have my phone with me.
(15:50):
I'm checking emails. I'm like, oh, what am I missing? What's going on?
What you know, what's you know, what's going on? What's going on?
That that that would constantly although, you know, I'm on vacation traveling and gives me a little bit of anxiety.
But this last vacation, you know, my phone wasn't, you know, wasn't able to connect.
And I just had to let it go and just be like, OK, well, whatever is going on, I'll deal with it when I get back.
And that just gave me just a sense of freedom and just peace, you know, like just to enjoy myself and completely just put myself in the experience and not worry about what's what's going on at work.
(16:21):
Because they let me tell you what was funny, though.
The first day or two, you were like, oh, yeah, you know, I'm just going to do work tomorrow.
I'm going to do work tomorrow. Yes.
And every day tomorrow showed up.
You just did not get any work done at all. You sip your wine.
Nothing. You told stories.
(16:43):
Nothing. And I'm just like, Daniel, I don't know why you continue to tell yourself that story.
And you know what, Lauren, when I came back, the emails were still there.
Nothing had, you know, nothing had exploded.
You know, the world. Yes.
Everything was going just fine. So that was a lesson for me.
(17:05):
It's almost like, let me disconnect. Let these people who get paid to do their jobs get paid to do their jobs.
Like, I don't have to step in to fix everybody's problem or to complete whatever task.
But it was just cool to see you disconnect.
Like, for real. No, and it felt it felt, you know, it felt good.
(17:29):
It felt good. Like, like I just felt I felt I think I felt at ease.
You know, I couldn't worry about what was going on in the emails because I couldn't see it.
It's going on. You know, so, you know, I felt at ease.
I felt very at ease this this trip in Mozambique. Right.
That's awesome. That's awesome.
Yeah. You know, one of the things that I think is really interesting about just the purpose
(17:53):
that I think we all have and maybe that's why we travel together so well is that it's that that desire to just learn to see something different.
First of all, the separate ourselves from our day to day and then see something different.
So I think that helps, too. Like, I know Keisha will come, for example, and she'll still do her work life balance thing.
But it's still kind of like I'm disrupting my flow of sitting at my apartment in New York and doing this.
(18:19):
Now I can actually like listen to some birds fly behind me and see some palm trees.
And even though I'm chopping up this email, I'm still in the midst of being in this different place.
Yeah. After the fair. Because Danielle, I think about that fish all the time.
Like the fact that we were on the beach and we asked for a menu like regular American.
Can we have a menu, please? And he brought us a tray of fish like menu.
(18:45):
Pick a fish like which one do you want? Right. Like that was what?
OK, I want that one. The one with the big eyes like.
Now, see, maybe I'm going to tell you what my first thoughts were,
because you were there trying to speak what little bit of Spanish you knew.
(19:06):
And you asked for the menu in Spanish. And when he bought out that tray of fresh fish,
my first thought was, is Nadine one man Nadine did not say, can I see a menu?
I think the correct way. And he shows up with a tray of fish.
(19:29):
That was the menu. I was confused for a moment.
Yeah. But then I realized, yes, that was the menu.
He was like, listen, I don't speak English. She is struggling to speak Spanish.
We just going to do this thing by live pictures.
And he pulled up with a tray of fish. And that was amazing.
Like that was amazing. You know, like you look back and you smile, you know,
(19:54):
and it's just you know what, Nadine, I think it's very important when you kind of equate
traveling to being a guest in someone else's country.
And I kind of look at it as a guest in someone's home.
For example, growing up, when you came into our house, you took your shoes off at the door.
You know what I mean? So when you come in and you see the shoes lined up, you know,
and it's take your shoes off. So, you know, I wouldn't go in someone's house where they're saying,
(20:16):
oh, take your shoes off. I say, no, I'm going to wear my shoes in the house because in my house,
we wear shoes through the house. And this is what I'm going to do in your house.
You know, so that's how I look at it. Like, you know, the rules of, you know, when you visit someone,
the rules of their house, that's their home. So that's how I look at it at travel.
Like that's their country, you know, and these are their rules.
And this is what I'm going to do as a guest in their country.
I think that's a great analogy. That's perfect.
(20:37):
And then also to that and think about it, especially if you're from the Caribbean, right?
And if you go into somebody's house, you get that speech ahead of time.
Don't ask for nothing. You're not thirsty. You're hungry. You're not this.
You know, you have those rules, right? And so you leave knowing that when you go to someone else's house,
you better be on your best behavior and you better not embarrass your parents and you better not do this.
(21:00):
There's these core set of rules that you understand.
And then even when you enter into that other person's space, you're observing enough, right?
We're so hyper village.
Well, you know, we're just in this hyper focus mode that we're like, we're observing.
OK, the dudes are at the door. I leave my shoes at the door.
I'm going to do this too. Oh, this is how you greet someone.
(21:23):
So, OK, I'm going to make that greeting to you.
You know, the aunties I have that are not my aunties, but that was the greeting. Right.
So then you just did the greeting.
So, you know, it's just so apropos to realize that you're a guest.
And then when you're a guest, when you're a guest, you abide by these rules.
You respect you honor.
You know, you want to make sure that those who invited you into their space feel happy that they did and not regret that they extended the invitation for you to come.
(21:48):
Absolutely. Absolutely. And I feel like both of those are such great examples.
You know, so when I see all these things popping up with, you know, people being upset about, you know,
don't go to this place because they don't allow this and don't go to this place because they don't.
I'm like, well, one, yeah, you do have to do your research to see what is your threshold.
Right. Because maybe your threshold, maybe you have funny looking feet and you don't want to take your feet off your shoes off in nobody's house.
(22:10):
Maybe maybe maybe it's your individual problem.
And it's fine. You know what I mean?
Maybe that's your thing. But if that's your individual thing, be aware of it so that you can make your individual decision as to whether or not you are capable of leaving
that part of your comfort zone. It's not a, you know, all these people are so horrible because they make you take off your shoes.
(22:32):
It's like, no, understand, have that self-awareness to know that maybe this is something that you just cannot do.
Right. But at the end of the day, as a guest, you cannot go into somebody's house stomping around just because that's what you do in your house.
Like it just it just does not work. And I think that was a perfect analogy for everything that you all keep saying that this is a Caribbean household type.
(22:54):
No, if you were raised by a black woman in general,
Fair enough, fair enough.
All right. All right.
Keisha, because growing up, my mother would take us to her friend's house and she would tell us, don't do not ask for anything to eat or to drink.
(23:17):
And these people are having a full 12 course meal and my stomach is growling.
But I dare not ask, even if they say you want something to eat, no ma'am.
No, no thank you. No thank you.
No thank you.
Stomach is eating my back. And I knew not to say yes to can I get a plate?
(23:46):
Not at all. So that's hilarious.
But what happens is I feel like instead of people being self aware about their individual needs, they then start spreading these ideals that, oh, this place is a bad place to be or, you know, don't go over to that person's house or whatnot or in the terms of, you know, switching it over to countries.
(24:08):
Don't go to that country. Don't go to this country.
And it's just like, but that was your individual thing. That doesn't mean that this whole population of people are just completely, you know, write them off the map type of people like, oh no, don't ever go over there.
I mean, Danielle and Danielle, you live there longer than I did. I lived there three and a half years, almost four years. Danielle, how long did you live in Abu Dhabi?
(24:31):
I was there four years. Four years. Okay.
Yeah. And I feel like, yeah, there were some things now it's not perfect. Just like America's not perfect. Just like no country is perfect. It wasn't perfect. But just the ways that you see things described to me is just so basic where it's just like, there are just basic things to respect.
Like, hey, you don't do certain things, certain ways. And that's it. That's all it comes down to.
(24:54):
And just respect. As a guest in the country for four years, I respected your rules. Like at the schools, right? Working in the schools, they required you to dress a certain way. Yeah. Okay. This is what's required in your schools.
This is what your teachers do. This is what your teleminators do to work in your schools. Okay. Fine. I used to wear a bias and I liked it. They were free flowing. They were comfortable.
(25:20):
You didn't have to worry, think too much about what I was going to put on in the morning, throw on my abaya and keep it moving.
But that, and it was kind of like a respect for the school. I was a guest in the school. So I'm going to respect your cultures and your way of life. Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, right. So what would y'all say outside of like the whole Dubai and respect debacle that we've been seeing lately? What would y'all say is your number one, I guess, piece of advice for travel etiquette?
(25:55):
One, if I didn't know, I would definitely look to join like online communities such as traveling black women on Facebook. You know, and just pose the question of, hey, I'm looking to travel to such and such place during such and such time.
You know, what can I expect? And there is going to be a few people that will just hop in the comments, you know, just to be able to provide like places to stay, what to eat, what to do, but also be able to provide informational, you know, what not to do, what to expect when you get there.
(26:40):
A lot of times when we when we go out of the country, you know, I'm looking up before even going, I'm looking up.
Will I be able to drive in this country and what do I need to be able to drive and what are the laws around, you know, me renting a car? And so I try to, you know, do the research on all of those things so that way when we get to wherever we're going, not only am I safe, but the people that are with me are safe as well.
(27:12):
So thanks, girl.
But did you die.
You know, I have come back.
(27:33):
And Nadine is always the first one in the first seat, talking about somebody's driving.
I'm very appreciative.
It complains the most but hey we all need a friend like that we all need that one friend.
I just want to say what Lauren said about research. I think that's important, you know, like you said, there's all these so much resources at your disposal, you know, there are these groups, there are these guides, plug traveling black women.
(28:12):
Do your research, know where you're going, what are the rules and you know regulations of the country you're going to.
I don't want to say there's no excuse but you know, the resources are there.
No, but you're right.
(28:33):
And here's the thing while you're doing your research, be curious. Yeah, and not just my soul, because it's so easy to say oh that's what they do. Oh that's how they live. That can never be me. Well okay if you want to go into their country for a particular moment
and period of time that is going to be you.
Also know the authorities right. So be curious, don't be judgmental, ask random questions just just think of it through and especially if you're going to a culture where there's probably a different dominant religion, or a different kind of stance and political
(29:06):
ideology, whether they're more conservative, less conservative, we want to know all these things and you know don't don't don't do these favorite flagrant files like so for example you know a country doesn't appreciate non military members were fatigued.
Don't don't wear that's not the time to wear your army fatigue hoodie through the airport.
(29:27):
It's not a very good welcome. Don't say oh I'm not going to be the one you you you might be the example for the day. And because you spent your money.
Because you got on a plane, because you packed the bag because you did all these things, you want to be able to go there you want people to enjoy yourself have a good time and come back and say you know what this is the great experience I've had this
(29:48):
is what I did. So get curious, not judgmental, learn, you know we're in the information age there's so much information in our fingertips, and just kind of be just resourceful like Lauren said like Danielle said look at the guides, Travel Back
Woman guides. Look at you know the Travel Back Woman Facebook page and you know there's some other Facebook pages which we support you can look at those two, and just do a Google search, ask Siri, ask Alessa.
(30:13):
You know there's so many ways to figure it out.
So true like I feel like there are so many resources out there now like back in 2010, when I was first moving to Abu Dhabi like everybody thought that I was getting ready to be you know swept up in some kind of like sex cult and they were like no this is not real.
But the resources were limited, you know, so it was a valid concern, but me having the same mindset then that I do now was like no I'm gonna go try it and see what happens you know.
(30:46):
And it turned out to be amazing it turned out to be one of the best experiences of my life, right.
And at the same time I did exactly what you say, Keisha, I stay curious right because I had no real knowledge of Islam or Muslim culture outside of Newark, New Jersey, like Newark, New Jersey.
Yeah, you know you heard about American and you heard about all these different things, but it was nation of Islam so it was a very different type of approach to Islam, but I got there.
(31:16):
And of course everyone's like oh you know the Middle East like it's going to be like this and 9-11 just happened and all of this.
And there's this fear that you're you kind of like get stirred up in you and then you get there and it's like oh they're offering me tea.
And they're curious about my hair and you know we're having these conversations, oh Ms. Nadine.
(31:37):
You know and it's just this whole different thing that you just don't you did not know to expect that is nothing like what people have like made you fear.
So that be curious is really really like write that down like be curious you know like really be curious about what it is that you can possibly expect because even if you do the research and you find out you ask the questions and you find out this and you find out that there is still this possibility that you get there.
(32:05):
And what you expect is still not what actually happens for you in that moment and without that curiosity you end up kind of being like oh it's not what I expected it to be well stay curious because maybe you'll see something else stay open maybe you'll see something else.
You know so I like that.
That was good. I'll see you girl. That was good.
(32:32):
I think one of the one of the biggest things for me with travel etiquette.
There's also something that needs to be set for how you show up how you present yourself how you engage with people you know doing little things simple things like learning how to say thank you and please and hello in the local language, like just little things that say hey I'm not just here to observe
culture and go. I'm really here to engage with you and even though I might say to my friends that I want to learn, I want you to know too, that I want to learn from you that I want to be a part of your culture and I feel like when we were in Mozambique, a couple
(33:05):
weeks ago that was last week. We were in Mozambique last week. I feel like we did a really good job of that of being like hey, we're not just here to just, you know, ride on these four wheelers and see what you got and go home like we want to talk, we want to engage
you want to see what you got going on over here we want to have these conversations. And I think that made such an impact you know like people were excited to talk to us excited to connect with us, and that felt really good.
(33:31):
Like I came home like, yeah, really good.
I wanted to put William in my suitcase and bring him.
I wanted to do that. Yes.
There are a lot of successful individuals in our group that are doing amazing things in their day to day lives and I think that,
(34:01):
when we go to these other countries we see like hey we could actually invest in our own properties and tap into the individuals that that live in that community to actually work for us but also make them business people themselves.
(34:22):
And you know it just, it just drops that that idea on me every time that we travel like, I need to come back and buy some land and just move here.
And then just employ the locals.
You know, since I can't bring them home, I just should just move there with them.
(34:45):
You know, you say that, and it reminds me of one day when we were, I guess, going into town to the market. And you know, one person on this on this podcast who shall remain nameless.
There was a young girl on the roadway selling cassava leaves, and she was selling them for 20 in my accounts. And so, you know, the young girl approached, and you know, the person said oh, how much, and she said 20.
(35:10):
She gave her the 20, then the young girl hand over the cassava leaves and she said no no no don't want them.
You know someone someone else, and just the joy. Right that overcame that young lady, just the joy that here here it was someone just gave her 20 bucks, or 20 of your dollars, and just, you know, it was just this.
I hadn't seen joy like that in a long time because sometimes, you know, being the states you don't get your PS five, you angry, you may, you know, you want to light somebody up.
(35:40):
But here it is 20 medicals right which was like a what like a dollar or something for us, or maybe more or less I don't recall, but just the joy and the excitement and then not only that she's with another young lady.
And they were, I know they were making their plans to go buy some chips go buy some something to go do something because they were flying about what they were going to do with this 20 dollars but they were just so overjoyed.
So, you know, right in being immersed in someone's culture. Right and I made this point before maybe and you're not just there to take you're just not there to stop and see and just kind of gone, but you're there to give right you're giving up yourself.
(36:13):
You're giving up your substance you're giving up your resources, and you're in your blessing someone with the memory you're blessing someone with this kind of experience to say wow, this person just gave me this and for them it could have been to us it might seem
insignificant, but for them it was like the most magnanimous thing that you could have done to make their day.
And I think that's also a blessing and a beauty about traveling, not what you could just get from being in that space but also what you can give, and you can leave there for people to remember to hold on to.
(36:44):
So true.
So true.
And in Mozambique in particular because people haven't really been speaking about Mozambique that much like it's still just kind of getting on the map in terms of travel and tourism and things like that. Like, most of the time they see white faces doing this you know they see
white faces coming to be tourists and things like that. So to see like, it almost feels like family like families come in and say hey what's up like you know it's Christmas, I don't know I didn't maybe at Christmas not a great example,
(37:16):
but it's just like, you know, this family is coming to say like what's up, and we're not just there with these expectations about what they can do for us because we're on vacation but it's like, it's a win win it's a mutual situation where I'm looking at y'all and like y'all look like me
and what you need because I want to help you know, you know, and it's, it just feels good it just feels like a impromptu family reunion, you know, and we're going through the airport a couple times and then another guy in our group like,
(37:45):
the guy who was checking the passports I was like, that looked like your cousin, you know what I mean? And he's looking around and he's like oh yeah he does kind of look like me you know, I think those moments are amazing because it's like, it's just connection.
Yeah, yeah.
But it's also the same when we were in Cartagena, when we were going, we were walking out, walking throughout the streets and every now and then you encounter someone. And I forget we're walking down some sidewalk and there was this young black lady looking out through a window and we kind of looked at her and she just smiled like, oh my color, my color.
(38:19):
Yes, so happy to see us and to see that we look the same and, you know, we may not speak the same language but there was kind of just that kind of semblance that look you're like me and I'm like you and, and we share this kind of like this common thing right be our skin tone, but this is what we share
and this is what connects us and it was just you know one of those other like heartwarming feelings of travel and what travel can do. Yeah, I would agree with that.
(38:49):
Absolutely. The guys that were running through rapping like I don't know what they were saying to this day.
They were just so excited to see us and you know they were rapping and talking to us and it was a connection. Yeah, it was pretty neat. It was pretty neat. It was like one of those moments where it's just like, now you're with us physically traveling and physically getting to know one another and just being in different spaces,
(39:15):
whether it be Columbia because Columbia has got plenty of black people speak in Spanish, you know or Panama, or right there in Mozambique like all of these different places where you have opportunities to see yourself mirrored in other cultures I think it's pretty dope.
You know, yeah, exactly. Well y'all. Would anybody have any final thoughts about the purpose of travel travel etiquette, what people should know if they're traveling if they're starting to travel novice travelers season travelers.
(39:49):
So, what people should know is is that it is okay to plan your next trip.
Don't feel like you're, you're, you know, you're not enjoying the moment, it is just that you are looking to continue the moment. Yeah, fair enough, and all the fields that come along with it so it's okay to plan your travel while you are your next vacation while you are on your current vacation.
(40:30):
I'm writing that down. I'm writing that down as a note.
Yeah, well my advice, along with similar to Lawrence and well not similar but, you know, always bring the extra bag to bring back the goodies and
(40:52):
travel with a friend or travel with a friend who has a larger bag.
Inside of it.
And he has a duty free in the airport click click click click.
Yes.
I would second that I would say definitely try the snacks in a different country like wherever you travel like just to double back on what Danielle said like if you go somewhere, you have got to try the snacks like the cheese, the cheese curls may not taste the same
(41:28):
but it's worth a try you know the new get like what did we get it was like a, it was a bar that it's not Snickers but it tastes like a Snickers but it tastes kind of better than Snickers it tastes like Snickers made with brown sugar.
So it's actually pretty good, because I mean I feel like most things that are made abroad are made with natural ingredients as opposed to here where it's just like,
(41:49):
this is right for me. Red number five. Yeah, blue number six.
Yes, try the snacks, try all the snacks.
Yeah, yeah, be a good guest, be a good guest in another country. Be a good guest. Yes, absolutely.
(42:11):
When you're packing your swimwear, when you're packing according to Lauren your tourist outfit.
When you're packing for the itinerary, do not forget to pack your patience.
As much as travel can be fun, it also can be a little bit tedious especially when you're trying to enter into someone's country, and your passport photo don't look like your visa photo, and you show up with braids in your hair, but your photo is a curly afro of you from like five years ago.
(42:44):
You know they're going to flip through your passport pages a couple of times and don't get nervous, don't get concerned. Just be cool. Just be gracious and answer whatever questions they have and you know keep the neck rolled to them and just say yes sir, no ma'am and that kind of thing.
Just remember you're going to have this experience, you're going to have this experience. And because you purpose in your heart, you intent in your heart to have this great time, there's going to be obstacles that come up to take away from them.
(43:14):
So pack your patience. To just kind of navigate those moments when you know something, some opposition, force or whatever is just trying to steal the joy that you just had, steal the joy that you're about to have.
And remember, to get through this moment, and I'm going to get to the next moment. So pack lots of patience, a big bag of patience, like a whole big bag.
(43:35):
Right. Yeah, and I want to say I think that's why I enjoy traveling with this group so much, because you know what, traveling, things are going to happen.
And I feel like you have your plans of how things are going to go and you get somewhere or maybe the excursions cancel, the excursions different than you expected, or maybe you know there's going to be something that doesn't go according to your plans.
(43:57):
And I think with this group, like, you know, when that happens, we don't sit around and mope and whine and you know like get, we're just like okay, you know, let's let's regroup, and let's go on to the next thing.
And you know, positive vibes right because when you're, when you're in another country and you know like you're far away from home and you know you don't, I personally don't like traveling with with negative vibes, you know, or with negative.
(44:21):
You want you want positivity, you know, like you're going to be here together for, you know, X amount of days. Let's keep it light, a bit positive, let's keep it moving.
So that's why I, you know, like like Keisha was saying, you know, pack your patience. I love that.
And, you know, like, you know, when we were in, sometimes you're going through customs, you know, the customs agents there, they're all day you know they're seeing people come through and, you know, like, you know, and they have their own stressors probably, but you know if they pull you aside to look at something or ask you a question, like, yes ma'am, no sir.
(44:53):
Keep it moving, keep it moving. Yeah, you're absolutely right about that because making the scene is not going to help. Right. Like we've seen that.
We've seen that in the news now that it's not helping that's putting people in jail, you know, and getting overly upset is going to cloud your vacation. You know, like, the logistics of moving in from airport to airport is is definitely going to be difficult.
(45:15):
Like I would say even in Mozambique, I felt like everyone was super sweet like all the locals like they were just like kind or whatnot, just mild mannered soft spoken, but those last two ladies at the airport that looked at my passport, they were not about that life.
I don't know where they were from, but they were not about that soft spoken life. Yes.
(45:36):
I mean, they grabbed my passport up, stamped it and sent me on my way and I'm over there like, because I mean, we just spent what seven days there so I'm over there like, hey, how are you?
We're not trying to hear that. They were not trying to hear that. What does it do me to be upset by that? I was like, oh, okay, well they're not for it today. Let me get my passport and go.
(46:01):
Okay, thank you. We don't want it to be on your way trying to transit home that your eye roll or you're like pointing finger at someone or you inadvertently or probably very much intentionally tapping someone and you up in prison.
Right.
We don't know their due process laws. Okay, we don't know if they got a bail thing system going on.
(46:23):
So we don't want to find out. And what we definitely want to do is have to go on Instagram talking about, okay, we're going to set up the GoFundMe for so and so because you're in jail and we got to get a foreign attorney and do it.
Right.
You just have to make the experience or you're about to have this amazing experience. Have the experience and check the app too. It's not, it's just not going to help you. It's just not going to get you to where you want to go.
(46:47):
Right. And I think the last thing that I do address because even when things don't go well, we can laugh about it. You know, a week later, a few days later, laughing.
Oh, remember when the experience, you know, like you said, like it's part of the chat part of the travel.
That is so true. That is so true because when Lauren had us end up in a ditch in Antigua and the tire was flat.
(47:17):
And we did not end up in a ditch. Tell me, tell me. The tire went flat and me and Kiesha came home and we was going to have to push. I like my version of the story better.
When I was on the triple, we were pushing Mozambique, pushing that van and we got through the ditch.
(47:39):
Being stuck in the sand like what? We were 30 deep in a 10 passenger van.
And I think three of the four wheels were caught, were buried in the sand. And then we had to walk on a sand silt road.
(48:00):
We had to wait about, I don't know, another 10 minutes to get to our dinner reservation or whatever that was. But immediately we were people of a different disposition.
And they were like, I don't know, I don't know, maybe they can bring us out here. We walking in no sand.
We took out our phones. We turned on the flashlight. We were singing songs. We were doing all sorts of things. And then we had an amazing meal.
(48:26):
Imagine, imagine, we're like thorough faced at that experience. We couldn't enjoy our meal. That's true.
And I'm just having an amazing story to tell. Yes. We enjoyed our meal. We fed some cats. They enjoyed their meal too.
I completely forgot that Daye was trying to feed those cats.
(48:47):
I did think of some food when nobody was looking. I saw a big old piece of chicken.
Daye, it seemed like you need to refund me my money for the food that you fed the cats.
Oh no. Oh no. But no, that's a perfect example of being adaptable and like making everything fun.
(49:12):
Like this is hilarious. I cannot believe we got stuck in the sand.
And now we got to march to this restaurant in the dark with this flashlights.
But they say, you know, travel makes you a storyteller. And that is one of the stories from this trip.
But Nisha, I want you to share your story of going through Dubai with your 18 different hairstyles.
(49:40):
It's an issue that only a black woman can have. Only a black woman can have.
Okay, I'm going to give you the abbreviated version. Okay. So because I traveled with a Jamaican passport, I had to get a visa for Dubai.
And so my visa photo is of my hair right now. You know, like my curly afro with, you know, this like orangey, well not orange, but blondish orangey color hair on top.
(50:09):
Now my passport photo is of me, my face is a little fuller then because I had a couple extra pounds.
So it was me with this like straight bob looking like very Jamaican. And in that photo, you'll know what it means.
You know, you know, when you're an immigrant taking a photo, you just have that look like your face is straight. There's no smile.
Right. Right. A faint, a faint touch of Vaseline on the lips. Not too much. Not too much.
(50:36):
But because you got to be tough in the passport photo, you just have to do it.
So okay, it's something I showed you to buy with the braids in my hair. Right. And I'm going to braids a little up and a little bun.
And I'm walking through like, okay. I think the rest of y'all have already gotten through. You got your badge. You're already shopping and duty free.
So I'm standing in line. And this is always when I know I have to start praying because they look at the first page and they look at me.
(51:02):
Look at the visa photo. They look at me. They flip through a couple more pages. They look at me.
And then someone starts speaking in a different language. I'm like, oh, here it is. Here it is. And so then he was like, who's this?
And I was like, oh, that's me. That's not you. I was like, no, it is me. Then he looked to another photo. Who's this?
And in that photo, I had my short afro curly hair, but it's all black. He's like, well, who's this? That's also me.
(51:28):
He's like, that's not you. And he's like, go to the back. Go to the back.
And I was like, oh my gosh, I'm about to be locked up. I'm about to go to jail. They want to move me back on a plane. I don't know what's going to happen.
So then the line in the back was so long. And I finally got to the front and there was a woman standing next to me.
And so I don't know where her issue was with her passport, but, you know, she says something to the guy and then she started to over talk him.
(51:54):
And he was like, I said, shut up. And I was like, oh, that's a lot of hair.
And he wasn't even talking to me. But I knew that was enough for me.
Like, yes, sir. No, sir. Had not. And they scared my eyes like 50 million times.
And they flipped through the photos again. Who's this? And who's this? And who's this?
So now I have my hair braids up in a bun. I took them out of the bun. I pulled them back.
(52:17):
I did all sorts of things so they can realize it's like it's really me.
And so they scared my ass one last time. They call somebody from the back and I'm like, Lord Jesus, I just need you to come help me right now.
All my friends that left me and I don't want to get on a plane to go back to the States. Just let them know it's me.
(52:39):
So finally, one guy kind of flipped through the photos again. Who's this? It's me.
Who's this? It's also me. And then they stamped something. They made a phone call. They're like, OK, all right.
But then leaving Dubai to come back to the States, I got pulled out of the line because they didn't think it was me.
So clearly, going forward, I decided my passport is about to expire.
(53:02):
So I think I'm getting my hair done with some braids. That's my traveling style. Yes, the braids.
I remember standing at a carousel with your bag like, where's Keisha? Oh my goodness.
Good times. So good times. And like, you know what? By the time you reconnected with all of us, it was like Danielle said,
(53:29):
y'all they cooked me in the back. They didn't believe who I was. All right, let's go on with the vacation. And we just kept it rolling.
You know, it was like, get me home now. I hate it here.
Oh, man. Yeah, I think that's what I love about this group too, Danielle.
(53:51):
Like the travel etiquette. Is that a word? The travel etiquette. Yeah, amongst us all, I feel like is this like par for the course.
It's right on point. So I appreciate it. Yeah, because hollering and getting mad and screaming, it's not going to get you anything.
(54:12):
It's not. Well, guys, I really thank y'all for this conversation today. Like I enjoy talking to you guys on a regular day anyway.
You know, when we go on vacations, we have such a good time. We just laugh and kiki. And you know, half the time it might be other than social media,
(54:33):
maybe weeks or months before we have a full blown conversation like this. And every time we connect, it's just like we never left.
You know what I mean? So I love it. And I'm just grateful for y'all. I'm grateful for y'all travel style.
Thank you. Yeah. Y'all. Thank y'all so much for this amazing conversation. I just absolutely love it. Absolutely love it. Absolutely love y'all. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Any last words?
(55:04):
Thank you for having us. You know, I actually my my sleepy self wanted to go to bed at eight o'clock, but could not miss out on this opportunity to one, catch up with my good people.
But to just talk about our travels and all of the good times that we've had traveling together. So thank you, Nene. Thank you, traveling black women.
(55:32):
Don't forget to follow us on all social media accounts. Traveling black women on Facebook, TikTok, Twitter or X, Instagram, threads everywhere.
Thank you, Brand Manager. Yes, I suck at everything you say. Thank you for, you know, creating this platform for, you know, women, black women to connect and communicate and, you know, get get more of us out there traveling.
(56:03):
Well, thanks, guys. Thanks for your support. Thanks for always being there. Thanks for always rocking your shirts. Sharing the post, you know, just being present, showing up the way that you guys have. I love you guys.
We love you too. I love you too.
Thanks, guys.
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