November 21, 2023 • 29 mins
It's just about Thanksgiving so we have another delicious episode to be thankful for! Have you ever been struck by the strength difference between your left and right arm? We also find ourselves reminiscing about childhood experiences of pilfering balls from ball pits and the shock of static electricity from plastic slides. Plus, we're on the hunt for a title for our podcast series, and we want you to be a part of it.
Diving further into the trombone world, we share a heartwarming story of a septuagenarian who took up the trombone following a dream. Not to mention, we tackle a listener questions and the amazing trombone quora of the week.
As we gear up for Thanksgiving, the conversation turns to the challenges trombone players face in orchestras and our frustrations over conductors failing to make the best use of our time and round it out with new gratitude. Lastly, we bring you up to speed on our podcast updates. Lesssgo!
Also introducing special features with Patreon: www.patreon.com/tromboneretreat
Learn more about the Trombone Retreat and upcoming festival here: linktr.ee/tromboneretreat
Hosted by Sebastian Vera - @js.vera (insta) and Nick Schwartz - @basstrombone444 (insta)
Produced and edited by Sebastian Vera
Music: Firehorse: Mvt 1 - Trot by Steven Verhelst performed live by Brian Santero, Sebastian Vera and Nick Schwartz
Thank you to our season sponsor Houghton Horns: www.houghtonhorns.com
Support the show
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The left arm should get strong of anything.
Yeah, the left arm is the beefyone.
Yeah, the right arm is gettingall the cardio you know.
So it should be like lean andcut, with the left arm being
like New Jack City.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Yeah, so the left arm is like a large man from
Finland named like MagnusFjörsen, that is, in, the
strongest man, and the right armis, like you know, a Kenyan
marathon runner.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Hello there, welcome.
What are you gonna say?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
I thought you're doing your thing, never mind, go
on.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
What were you saying?
Hello?
I was just gonna say hi back.
Oh, you thought I was talkingto you, that's so nice.
Well, I mean, I am talking toyou.
You're the only one I'm talkingto, so you're not wrong.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
That's true, wow.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
We're like we're a well-oiled machine.
Episode like 50 or whatever.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
this is Well you want to do your intro now?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
I mean I don't have an intro for this, that's true.
That's true.
I mean everyone kind of makesfun of me with you know they'll
see me in real life and be likewelcome to the Trombone Retreat
podcast of the third coastTrombone Retreat and they still
call it like the third coastpodcast, brian Hect.
But you know, maybe one daypeople will know what this is
called.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, one can dream a dream, John Sebastian Vera.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Speaking of what this is called, we had a couple more
people message us with ideasfor the title of the show.
For our side, more weekly shortform series that we're doing
now.
This is the third installmentof it.
One person sent in PasoninAround, pasonin Around.
It's cute, it's cute.
(01:45):
I don't know if that's like aplay on words or not.
Pasonin Around Po sauna arelike.
Eight German listeners are likeyeah.
Po sauna, and then one that'slike a little bit influenced by
our first episode aboutTrombone's being the best lovers
, is the slide in.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Hmm, the slide in.
Well, that also makes me thinkof like a really quaint bed and
breakfast that's trombone themed.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Or it's like.
It's like it's like 24 sevenrecess and it's just slides
everywhere.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Oh, dude, remember the, the plastic slides like
McDonald's and stuff, and howmuch static I could give you, oh
my God.
And then you touch one of therivets and it's like zap.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
One time when I was little, I stole one of the balls
from the ball pit and, becauseI don't know, I wanted it and I
got back to the car and halfwayhome my mom realized I had it
and I've never seen her so angryat me before and we promptly
had to go back and return saidball, which was probably
disgusting and full of likecovered in urine.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I mean, yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Those ball pits probably haveso much accidental urine and
poop in them.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
But it was mine for that 10 minutes.
It was mine.
But back to that bed andbreakfast because you could like
put in your hotel room.
It could have like a bunch ofdifferent exits which is just
like a big shoot or slide inlike one's like to breakfast and
one's like to your car, one'sto the front desk.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Now, how do you get back up?
Is there like a fun way to getback up, or is it just stairs?
Yeah, that's kind ofcomplicated.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
There's no way for a slide to go back into your room
unless it's like some sort oflike amazing technology, that's
like an upward slide, like anEscher painting.
Yeah, yep, that's what I wasthinking.
So someone invent that bed andbreakfast and you'll make a
million dollars.
So I don't know, nick, we cantalk about it, but so some of
(03:45):
the main ideas slide in, pass onit around.
Fifth position all things rusty, jones and Furibones, and from
Alexis in the green room, withmy heart, I think the tightest,
the cleanest, the it goes withour history of we used to ask
this question.
I think fifth position solid,I'm just going to say it.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Hmm, you know, I'm not a soul.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
What is there anyone that you're drawn to?
Are you still like I?
Select the idea, we put themall out there and we do a poll
and see when Nick says thesethings, he means Sebastian, make
a poll, put it on social media,because anytime I try to do
anything on social media, Idon't spell words good or use
grammar good.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Hey, you know, I got these big old sausage fingers.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
The thing is, we know trombones.
If we make a poll and theychoose something ridiculous, we
might be stuck with that.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Well, I'm gonna say that only of eternity, only we
get to see the results of thepoll.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
So I don't think that's true again With your.
That's a great expertise.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Well, if it's on Instagram, yes, everyone sees it
.
I mean, but I guess that's theonly way to do it.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Yeah, hmm, what's gonna happen is Alexis is gonna
like share it to her manyfollowers and Just like lobby
everyone to vote for Jones andfor a bones, and then I'm gonna
have to say Jones and for abones and all the time, and that
brings me a lot of joy.
You're gonna have to say it too, that brings me a lot of joy as
well.
Okay, all right, I look forwardto the poll that you're gonna
(05:15):
make on the patreon this month.
Patreoncom slash from ownertreat.
We had a special guest thismonth, brian Wendell, new
principal trombonus of theCleveland Orksha, talking about
Attacking his weaknesses in hisroutine with our trombone advice
video, and we also hung outwith Justin Waller in our live
After-hours hang, which was kindof ridiculous, and he has some
(05:39):
of the best it's.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
I mean, there's people out there that are famous
for a Trump impersonation yeah,like celebrities and stuff,
I've never heard one as good ashis.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
It's unbelievable, ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
We might need to bring him on the show just to
like, just yeah when he does it,it's like it sounds exactly the
cadence, everything it soundsjust like Trump.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
We should like have him on and like ask him trombone
questions.
Ask Donald Trump trombonequestions About how he's gonna
like support trombonus if he'selected.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Oh my god.
Yeah, well, you know, we nowknow the guy that we can do that
with, but cool.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
So Would you like to hear about what's going on the
world in trombone?
Google alerts I.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Want nothing more and expect nothing less.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Well, I know you're wondering.
Trombone shorty is doing stuff.
Oh my god, he is.
He is out there.
Trombone is in his name andthere's news written about him.
Good for him, because we'refans.
He should come on the podcastsometime.
If you know trombone shorty,tell him he should come on the
podcast.
But there's actually a charmingstory from the Guardian.
Was the Guardian the same onethat wrote the article about the
(06:44):
trombones being the best lovers?
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Um, I think that was the.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
The mirror.
That was mirror, because Ican't say that word, yeah Well,
anyways, english journalism isdoing much better about the
trombone world.
So there's a really lovelyarticle written by Amar Kalia
about this woman who at the ageof 72?
Just had this random urge tolearn the trombone.
She's a cafe owner, 72 yearsold, and she just had a dream
(07:12):
that she played the trombone andshe was having the time of her
life.
She said there was a jazzy tuneon on in the background.
I was playing along on atrombone, bending the notes and
having a great time, and so whenshe woke up, she just realized
she had to learn the trombone,and I think that is badass.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
Do you know?
I have a story that's almostidentical to this with us with a
student.
They had a dream.
I had an adult student who, atlike 50-something years old, had
a vivid dream that he couldplay the trombone.
Had never played an instrument.
It was so vivid and so like apleasurable that he woke up,
(07:48):
went straight to Sam Ash andbought, like a student, yamaha
trombone and then startedseeking out trombone lessons.
Well, his sons band director ismarried to the second Tramones
in the ballet and he see, heremembered that for some reason
and so reached out to him and hecouldn't do it.
So he asked if I would teachhim.
So I taught him and he came andfor his first lesson and he was
(08:11):
so excited because in his mindit's gonna be like this dream,
and of course he.
Well, first of all he took openthe trombone case and he, right
, when he's opening up, I waslike no, don't open it that way,
open it upside down.
That's the first lesson in sixthgrade, yeah and so he pulls out
the trombone and realizes oh mygod, this is so much harder
than I thought it was gonna be.
(08:32):
Yeah, we did let.
We had lessons for like sixmonths and he's a great guy.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
But that's crazy that the story is very identical to
that one and in his dream Wasthere a big bearded, formerly
mulleted man teaching him theart and ways of the trombone.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I think that came Later during his daily
meditation.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Oh good yeah cuz Nick makes sure all the students
meditate about his lessons everytime.
Yep, that's good, that's goodabout all the knowledge you're
gonna get from me.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
And and you will.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
So, yeah, check out this article if you want a
little feel-good read.
Her name is Noreen Davies.
It's in the Guardian.
That's just, it's horrible.
We want some more trombonejournalism.
Keep it coming.
All right, so we have a newquestion of the week from our
audience, dan Morris, our friendDan Morris.
Dan Morris, he wrote inresponse to last week's episode
(09:27):
about we found a trombone quoraquestion about how a trombone
would be best used as a weapon.
Right, that's right, okay, andwe tried to cover the best we
could with our vast knowledge oftrombone violence.
But his question titledtrombone violence question was
neither of you talked about howyou can use it as a blowgun.
(09:49):
With poison darts I've shotmany a thumbtack a great
distance with accuracy throughmy slide.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
So okay, that's obviously, you take off the
outer slide and it's like a peashooter at that point.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
then oh so it's like literally how pea shooter.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
Yeah, like a literal pea shooter.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, do you know anyone that's ever shot a pea of
their slide?
Speaker 2 (10:09):
I used to do the spitballs.
I'm sure you did too.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
No, I was learning the instrument.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I shot a lot of spitballs.
That's all I can tell you.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
I don't know, thumbtack, that's kind of like,
that's like a, that's an actualdangerous so that's what I'm
wondering, because you don't getquite a good seal with a
thumbtack.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
It wouldn't fill up the whole slide.
So I bet you he put it intolike a spitball so that you
could jam it in there and thenput engineering yeah, that's a
lot of engineering you inhaletoo much and you inhale the
thumbtack.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Well, that's always the danger with blowdarts.
You know poison darts and youcan, and you can mix up all the
different types of darts becauseyou know you could have the
poison dart.
You could have the put them tosleep dart, you could have the,
the darts that make them likegrow gigantic or really small.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
What is this Alice in Wonderland, all of a sudden?
Speaker 1 (11:09):
I guess you're just not familiar.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Who's your alchemist?
Where do you, where do you get?
Speaker 1 (11:13):
such a tincture.
There's a lot of.
There's a lot of methods.
Okay, I think we covered thatone.
Thank you, dan.
Please send in more questions.
Question to the quer is what'swhat's?
What should our question of theweek be, nick?
Speaker 2 (11:28):
What's your favorite and least favorite dish for
Thanksgiving?
Speaker 1 (11:32):
Okay, all right, and we can tell you if you're right
or wrong.
That's cool, and so emailtrombone retreat at gmailcom or
message us on the Instagrams orthe Facebooks or MySpace.
Yeah, our MySpace account iskilling it.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
Yeah, the custom music we have on our home screen
.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
What if?
What if you decided to likethat was your angle like I'm
just going to dominate MySpacewhile everyone's looking the
other way.
I'm going to create an army onMySpace and just get all the
attention.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Well, first of all, I think we'd have to get MySpace
back up and running.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Is it like?
Not even.
I mean no way it's running.
I actually it's like it's on,but there's it's like doesn't
work very well.
Like I found my old profile.
It's there.
Actually I should not tellpeople to go find that.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Oh my God, I bet you, your MySpace was incredible in
high school.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
I mean, you don't really do anything on it except
have your top 10, which is myspace is up, but it's not really
up.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Oh my God, so weird.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Yeah, it's like kind of there and you can, I couldn't
.
I guess you could write likeyour favorite songs.
I don't even remember what youdid on it.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
You could customize your your home screen where you
had like a like a little snippetof a song and like, yeah, you
could have.
It was kind of like in that waymore customizable than a
Facebook home page, but alsolike there's way less stuff you
could put on there in general.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
You could put all your favorite emo lyrics and emo
songs on it.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Did Sebi have an emo period period?
Speaker 1 (13:08):
That's, that's another, that's for the people
that have known me since college, of course, Let me, let me try
to guess.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Neutral Milk Hotel.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
No, that well, they are pretty great, are they?
Are they emo?
Okay, what about my chemical?
Speaker 2 (13:22):
romance.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
That was that was a little younger than me.
My jam was dashboardconfessional.
I'm not going to lie.
I went to a dashboardconfessional concert, I'll
confess.
Oh, he did it, folks.
And he actually, at the veryend of the concert he threw his
pick and it frisbee through theair like dramatically in slow
(13:45):
motion.
My arms were crossed.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Of course they were, because you were like whenever.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
Oh yeah, exactly, I was feeling all my feelings at
that point in life.
I kind of looked up for asecond.
I saw this thing whirling inthe air towards me and I was
pretty far back.
I swear to God, it landed on myforearm.
It just like frisbee throughthe air, just landed on my
forearm and I caught it and it'smine.
You were chosen.
I lost it.
I might have it somewhere.
(14:10):
I think I put it somewhere.
Then I cried for a bitScreaming and Fidelity's.
Okay.
So our next segment.
We were talking about havinggripes, but, like the most
obvious thing in the world thata friend pointed out to me is
that obviously the segmentshould be called Bone to Pick.
I know that, I know there's agreat interview series called
that, but this is just focusedon our gripe of the week and I
(14:33):
think, nick, you have a bone topick.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Well, also bone to pick is very on topic for
Thanksgiving.
Coming up, turquibone, thereyou go, turquibones.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Do you have big plans for Thanksgiving?
Speaker 2 (14:45):
I cook every year, have friends over.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Do you have a nutcracker that day?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
No, it starts on Friday, oh nice.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Are you doing all the cooking?
I'm actually going to letsomeone help you.
We're doing all the cooking,but Daniela does the desserts
and you're not going to letanyone bring anything.
Why?
Why would I do that?
Because Thanksgiving is acommunal activity where people
bring things together.
It's not a solo performance.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
I like to cook for people.
It's my love language, okay.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
That's going to be my bone to pick.
Okay, what's yours?
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Okay, turquibone players, we sit around a lot in
orchestra, that's a given Mm.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Hmm, but when conductors oh, you're gearing up
, you're, you're upset, I cantell.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Our ass.
Specifically, are we going toget to such and such section
which is like An hour away orwhatever.
In the music this is reallymuch more exaggerated.
In opera, everything's longerand we play generally less.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
And you're doing that for the reason of like do I
need to be here, Do I need to?
Speaker 2 (15:53):
be here, yeah.
And then you sit around andthey go oh yeah, of course we're
going to get to that section.
Yeah, please, please be here.
Then you sit around for anothertwo hours In rehearsal ends and
you don't play a single noteand they don't use you.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Why it's like, yes, you're getting paid, but and to
be devil's advocate, maybe theydon't know, but when they act,
so sure that they're going toget to your part and they don't.
That's bullshit and it's one ofthose things that A conductor
can easily gain, every point heever needs with a low brass
(16:30):
section, guest conductor orpermanent conductor, by just
like being aware of the factthat often we only play like one
movement and thinking aheadabout how he's going to rehearse
, and maybe like knocking outthat movement at the beginning
or communicating that likeyou'll be like the coolest
conductor ever, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Or letting the whole orchestra go like 10 minutes
early.
Oh, oh, genius, instant genius.
No, it just yeah.
It's like I don't know what itis.
Yes, you're getting paid.
I know it seems like a stupidthing to get all bent out of
shape about, but it's like Idon't know.
It feels kind of close todisrespectful, even though it's.
(17:09):
I don't think it's intentionalat all.
I really don't.
Yeah, and then, akin to that,this has happened I'm sure it's
happened to you too where yousit there forever and then you
come in and it's not like thebest trombone entrance ever,
because we've been sitting therefor an hour plus and then the
conductor is like whoa trombones, and you're like give me, give
me a break, dude.
(17:30):
Like, while you guys have beenout like playing the whole time,
we've just been sitting heregetting cold, you know.
So that's, that's, that's theskill that you have.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
So that's, that's.
That's the skill that peopledon't talk about enough.
Can you just like sit there forhalf an hour and come in on
something incredibly importantthat everyone's going to hear,
whether it be incredibly soft orloud or solo, and just be like
money, Money, money?
Speaker 2 (17:52):
money.
That's the challenge.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Yeah, totally.
I love the challenge.
It's fun, but you know it takessome, some preparation.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
And it takes a little bit of understanding of the why
.
That's of its own form ofdifficult.
It's difficult to sit there asa string player and play all
those notes, of course, butthere's also it's a completely
apples and oranges thing.
It's very difficult to sitthere and jump on the moving
train and but you're.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
But, but a conductor that, like, plays the piano.
I mean, it's just, you justpush the button.
So why don't you just push thebutton on your trombone and make
it sound good?
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
I know Sounded good on MIDI.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
Well, nick, I hope that made you feel better to
talk about that.
Conductors I know so manyconductors listen to this.
I think the only conductor isyour wife, I guarantee she's
probably good about that.
She's very good about it, sostop it All right Now.
Now time for my favoritesegment, nicholas, the trombone
Quora question of the week.
And I have to.
I have to admit, the hardestpart of my job preparing for
(18:52):
this is choosing a Quoraquestion, because the ocean of
great trombone Quora questionsis endless.
Okay, I can't wait.
So our trombone weapon questionlast week was was very helpful
for all trombonist when theyneed to defend themselves in
apocalypse.
So the trombone Quora questiontoday, and I just really like
(19:13):
how this was written.
Why don't professional tromboneplayers develop a big, beefy
right arm even after years ofdaily practice?
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Okay, my literal response would be an obvious
lack of understanding of that.
The right arm doesn't supportanything, so why would it get
strong?
The left arm should get strongof anything.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Yeah, the left arm is the beefy one.
The right arm is getting allthe cardio, you know.
So it should be like lean andcut, with the left arm being
like New Jack City.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, so the left arm is like a large man from
Finland named Magnus Fjörsen,the strongest man, and the right
arm is, like you know, a Kenyanmarathon runner.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Do you name your two biceps?
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Yeah, over here I got Kid Ori and over here You're
stealing.
Yeah, I am, and on the leftside here I got JJ Johnson.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Yeah.
So, guys, one day I realizedthat I don't know if you guys
catch this reference I mean, Ithink it maybe is from Anchorman
when he just refers to his JackO'Leary and something Johnson
like his two arms when he'sabout to get in a fight with
someone and I realized thatnothing works better than naming
your two arms old jazz drumbone player names.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
I mean it does sound intimidating.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Some Bob Brookmeyer and JJ Johnson have to say about
that.
It's just, it's endless, itreally is.
It is Frank Rosalino.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Okay, so I wonder what that would look like if
someone just had one reallystrong arm.
I guess it does happen, right.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
But, like having strength, there's difference
between strength and flexibility.
So like, if you're likeinsanely jacked, I wonder if it
affects your mobility at all.
We should talk to Ethan Garzaabout this, our friend, who's
the baster most than SeattleSymphony, who's just like a
bodybuilder and ridiculous Ifthat affects anything.
(21:27):
But he'll probably say it justmakes him more awesome, knowing
him.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Well, yeah, I mean, I don't think, I don't think we
we're qualified to answer thisquestion, because what are you
talking about?
We're equally jacked on botharms.
There you go.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
It's not a video pod yet so you can still explain how
ripped we are.
I hope that answers that personout in the universe is Trombone
query Quite.
Even he wrote even after yearsof daily practice.
And you know it is funnylooking at Trombone players
because they often, if you, ifyou just have them stand up
straight with their arms ontheir side, more often than not
(22:07):
you see the left shoulder beinga little bit higher.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
Yep and the right arm being longer.
Speaker 1 (22:12):
Those delts?
Well, cool, I think thatanswers that question.
And so, since we have a bone topick, we should balance it out
with a moment of gratitude.
Absolutely so my moment ofgratitude this week and I don't
know if I've ever talked aboutthis on the pod before so I
think one really special thingand beautiful thing that the
(22:34):
Pittsburgh Symphony does thatI've gotten to play with them
quite a bit as I've lived inhere in Pittsburgh with my
friends Jim Nova and PeteSullivan and Jeff D, doug
Rosenthal and of course, craigKnox on on Tuba.
And, as you know, as many of youknow, murray crew was the
longtime bass trombonist of thePittsburgh Symphony and in his
(22:56):
prime, you know, arguably one ofthe most talented bass
trombonist in the country.
I know Nick was a big fan, healmost came here to study with
him and Anyone that knew Murray.
He was quite a character.
We unfortunately lost him a bitearly in his life a few years
ago, but he was known for justbeing the life of the party, a
pure extrovert.
(23:16):
He'd always close down the barwith you, he'd always have a
funny story, always never beingserious, always making everybody
laugh just larger than lifepersonality, and I see that
personality a lot in his son,ralph, who's one of my best
friends here in Pittsburgh, abrilliant, brilliant person, and
he for some reason in thistotally fits Murray's
(23:37):
personality.
During every tuning note, everytuning A in the orchestra, he
would always play a pedal D.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Classic bass trombone move too.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
And not like Hydenit, pretty like.
Here's my note.
I'm warming up calibratingIntune and something really
amazing that the PittsburghSymphony trombone section does
Not all of them, but at leastone of them every single time
from now on until forever.
As long as they're in theorchestra they play a pedal D.
(24:07):
Now, ever since we lost Murray,and I got to join in on that a
few times.
Sometimes pedal Ds don't wannacome out first thing in the
morning, but I just thought thatwas so neat and so carrying on
his funny legacy.
And you see these violists turnaround, sometimes like what are
they doing back there?
And sometimes Jim Nova willplay it and like this one's for
(24:28):
you, murray, and it's justreally cool.
I got to tell Ralph that oneday, his son, and that like I
saw tears come in his eyes, likethat really meant a lot to him.
So if you ever go to aPittsburgh Symphony concert
which I highly recommend, makesure you're listening during the
tuning note.
You'll most likely hear thatpedal D.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
That is a very.
You told me that recently and Ithought that was a more than
perfect way to memorializesomeone in a very while.
It's not 100% subtle, it'srelatively subtle.
It's kind of an inside storyslash joke.
Yeah, it's just there and it'ssomething quick and something
you can do every day and that'snice.
(25:08):
I like that.
That is a feel good story,sebastian.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
You know, we feel good here, we feel good on the
retreat.
We get our anger out and thenwe feel good, because you know
why.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
You know why why?
Because hurt people hurt people.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
I like, when you really wanna get a message
across, you gotta get reallyclose to the microphone.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Hey, everybody, listen up.
This is Uncle Nick talking toyou.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
Wait, hold on.
This will be.
This segment is called 10Seconds of ASMR with Nick
Schwartz.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Hey kids, just remember, always eat your
vegetables.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
We did talk about I think the very first Trombone
retreat podcast, about how wewould do a Trombone ASMR with
Trombone sounds and spraybottles and stuff.
We should do that sometime.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
The best sound is a really good bell.
When you flick it it's likeboing.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Dude, my students at Duquesne University have gotten
this inside joke thing in thestudio now and they think it's
hilarious and they do it inrehearsals now, where they just
do the cling on the mouthpiece.
All right.
All right, that's a really highpitch and they think one of our
conductors, who's a littleolder, can't hear it and so
they'll just keep doing it.
(26:33):
It's one of those things thatsomeone will do it and you just
kinda do a double take likewhere'd that come from, where'd
they?
Speaker 2 (26:37):
and now they all do it and I'm just like guys,
there's a trumpet player in theMet who has this one straight
mute.
How do you think he uses it toplay?
He just brings it in the pitbecause it has this one feature,
which is when you go to like,you know, kind of screw in the
mute you know I'm talking aboutto like tighten it in the corks
somehow, squeak in his trumpet,and when I tell you it sounds
(27:02):
like a screaming banshee, it isthe loudest freaking sound, and
he'll do it like, right when theapplause starts, he'll just
like twist it once and it's like, just like this really quick
screech that is so freaking loudand it's like the first time
you hear.
It's terrifying.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
He's just doing it to be annoying, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
And he doesn't just want to like that, like real
quick, and then just like putsit down and pretends like
nothing happened.
We also have a horn player thatcan do this.
You know, when you bop themouthpiece with your hand, yeah
He'll.
He'll somehow like pull themouthpiece just out a little bit
and so he's it's kind of in thereceiver, but it's like in his
hand.
And when he does that and popsit on it really hard, the sound
(27:42):
it makes it sounds like apopping a cork, but like at like
a hundred times volume.
It's so freaking loud and I'venever been able to replicate it.
That's how you get yourmouthpiece stuck.
Well, that's why you hold it inyour hands, and it's not quite
in the receiver.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
But if it does, you go to howdandhornscom and you
order that, one of those greatmouthpiece puller outers.
Puller outer, that's what'scalled.
That's, that's the technicalterm.
Well, my mother is herevisiting and we're about to fly
back to Texas.
She's here.
She came to see the last operaand of course I woke up and
she'd like clean my entirekitchen and put up my Christmas
(28:19):
tree with lights and oh my God Iknow and then gave me a lecture
about the state of my kitchen.
So it was like it was a win anda loss at the same time.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
Yeah, you usually don't come out scot-free on
those.
It's never just like oh, I didthis and you're not going to
hear anything about it.
We'll give that lady a hug fromfrom Nicholas Robert Schwartz.
Did you forget?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
your name for a second I did for a second, it's
okay.
So Make sure you subscribe tothe podcast.
This has been another episode.
Obviously, trumbone retreat.
On the all the social medias,we have a lot of really cool
guests for the short formpodcast coming up and we have
some long form guests coming upsoon that we're really excited
(29:02):
about and let us know what youthink of this new format.
We're not going to do it allthe time, but I'm thinking this
is a nice way to Keep going anddon't forget to subscribe to
everything.
Press that like button,subscribe All those things and
follow Nick at base trumbone 444on the Instagrams and myself at
JS dot vera on the Instagramsand make it a great day.
(29:25):
Bye.
The left arm should get strong of anything.
Yeah, the left arm is the beefyone.
Yeah, the right arm is gettingall the cardio you know.
So it should be like lean andcut, with the left arm being
like New Jack City.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Yeah, so the left arm is like a large man from
Finland named like MagnusFjörsen, that is, in, the
strongest man, and the right armis, like you know, a Kenyan
marathon runner.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Hello there, welcome.
What are you gonna say?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
I thought you're doing your thing, never mind, go
on.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
What were you saying?
Hello?
I was just gonna say hi back.
Oh, you thought I was talkingto you, that's so nice.
Well, I mean, I am talking toyou.
You're the only one I'm talkingto, so you're not wrong.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
That's true, wow.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
We're like we're a well-oiled machine.
Episode like 50 or whatever.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
this is Well you want to do your intro now?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
I mean I don't have an intro for this, that's true.
That's true.
I mean everyone kind of makesfun of me with you know they'll
see me in real life and be likewelcome to the Trombone Retreat
podcast of the third coastTrombone Retreat and they still
call it like the third coastpodcast, brian Hect.
But you know, maybe one daypeople will know what this is
called.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, one can dream a dream, John Sebastian Vera.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Speaking of what this is called, we had a couple more
people message us with ideasfor the title of the show.
For our side, more weekly shortform series that we're doing
now.
This is the third installmentof it.
One person sent in PasoninAround, pasonin Around.
It's cute, it's cute.
(01:45):
I don't know if that's like aplay on words or not.
Pasonin Around Po sauna arelike.
Eight German listeners are likeyeah.
Po sauna, and then one that'slike a little bit influenced by
our first episode aboutTrombone's being the best lovers
, is the slide in.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Hmm, the slide in.
Well, that also makes me thinkof like a really quaint bed and
breakfast that's trombone themed.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Or it's like.
It's like it's like 24 sevenrecess and it's just slides
everywhere.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Oh, dude, remember the, the plastic slides like
McDonald's and stuff, and howmuch static I could give you, oh
my God.
And then you touch one of therivets and it's like zap.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
One time when I was little, I stole one of the balls
from the ball pit and, becauseI don't know, I wanted it and I
got back to the car and halfwayhome my mom realized I had it
and I've never seen her so angryat me before and we promptly
had to go back and return saidball, which was probably
disgusting and full of likecovered in urine.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I mean, yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Those ball pits probably haveso much accidental urine and
poop in them.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
But it was mine for that 10 minutes.
It was mine.
But back to that bed andbreakfast because you could like
put in your hotel room.
It could have like a bunch ofdifferent exits which is just
like a big shoot or slide inlike one's like to breakfast and
one's like to your car, one'sto the front desk.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Now, how do you get back up?
Is there like a fun way to getback up, or is it just stairs?
Yeah, that's kind ofcomplicated.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
There's no way for a slide to go back into your room
unless it's like some sort oflike amazing technology, that's
like an upward slide, like anEscher painting.
Yeah, yep, that's what I wasthinking.
So someone invent that bed andbreakfast and you'll make a
million dollars.
So I don't know, nick, we cantalk about it, but so some of
(03:45):
the main ideas slide in, pass onit around.
Fifth position all things rusty, jones and Furibones, and from
Alexis in the green room, withmy heart, I think the tightest,
the cleanest, the it goes withour history of we used to ask
this question.
I think fifth position solid,I'm just going to say it.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Hmm, you know, I'm not a soul.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
What is there anyone that you're drawn to?
Are you still like I?
Select the idea, we put themall out there and we do a poll
and see when Nick says thesethings, he means Sebastian, make
a poll, put it on social media,because anytime I try to do
anything on social media, Idon't spell words good or use
grammar good.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Hey, you know, I got these big old sausage fingers.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
The thing is, we know trombones.
If we make a poll and theychoose something ridiculous, we
might be stuck with that.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Well, I'm gonna say that only of eternity, only we
get to see the results of thepoll.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
So I don't think that's true again With your.
That's a great expertise.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Well, if it's on Instagram, yes, everyone sees it
.
I mean, but I guess that's theonly way to do it.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Yeah, hmm, what's gonna happen is Alexis is gonna
like share it to her manyfollowers and Just like lobby
everyone to vote for Jones andfor a bones, and then I'm gonna
have to say Jones and for abones and all the time, and that
brings me a lot of joy.
You're gonna have to say it too, that brings me a lot of joy as
well.
Okay, all right, I look forwardto the poll that you're gonna
(05:15):
make on the patreon this month.
Patreoncom slash from ownertreat.
We had a special guest thismonth, brian Wendell, new
principal trombonus of theCleveland Orksha, talking about
Attacking his weaknesses in hisroutine with our trombone advice
video, and we also hung outwith Justin Waller in our live
After-hours hang, which was kindof ridiculous, and he has some
(05:39):
of the best it's.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
I mean, there's people out there that are famous
for a Trump impersonation yeah,like celebrities and stuff,
I've never heard one as good ashis.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
It's unbelievable, ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
We might need to bring him on the show just to
like, just yeah when he does it,it's like it sounds exactly the
cadence, everything it soundsjust like Trump.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
We should like have him on and like ask him trombone
questions.
Ask Donald Trump trombonequestions About how he's gonna
like support trombonus if he'selected.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Oh my god.
Yeah, well, you know, we nowknow the guy that we can do that
with, but cool.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
So Would you like to hear about what's going on the
world in trombone?
Google alerts I.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Want nothing more and expect nothing less.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Well, I know you're wondering.
Trombone shorty is doing stuff.
Oh my god, he is.
He is out there.
Trombone is in his name andthere's news written about him.
Good for him, because we'refans.
He should come on the podcastsometime.
If you know trombone shorty,tell him he should come on the
podcast.
But there's actually a charmingstory from the Guardian.
Was the Guardian the same onethat wrote the article about the
(06:44):
trombones being the best lovers?
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Um, I think that was the.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
The mirror.
That was mirror, because Ican't say that word, yeah Well,
anyways, english journalism isdoing much better about the
trombone world.
So there's a really lovelyarticle written by Amar Kalia
about this woman who at the ageof 72?
Just had this random urge tolearn the trombone.
She's a cafe owner, 72 yearsold, and she just had a dream
(07:12):
that she played the trombone andshe was having the time of her
life.
She said there was a jazzy tuneon on in the background.
I was playing along on atrombone, bending the notes and
having a great time, and so whenshe woke up, she just realized
she had to learn the trombone,and I think that is badass.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
Do you know?
I have a story that's almostidentical to this with us with a
student.
They had a dream.
I had an adult student who, atlike 50-something years old, had
a vivid dream that he couldplay the trombone.
Had never played an instrument.
It was so vivid and so like apleasurable that he woke up,
(07:48):
went straight to Sam Ash andbought, like a student, yamaha
trombone and then startedseeking out trombone lessons.
Well, his sons band director ismarried to the second Tramones
in the ballet and he see, heremembered that for some reason
and so reached out to him and hecouldn't do it.
So he asked if I would teachhim.
So I taught him and he came andfor his first lesson and he was
(08:11):
so excited because in his mindit's gonna be like this dream,
and of course he.
Well, first of all he took openthe trombone case and he, right
, when he's opening up, I waslike no, don't open it that way,
open it upside down.
That's the first lesson in sixthgrade, yeah and so he pulls out
the trombone and realizes oh mygod, this is so much harder
than I thought it was gonna be.
(08:32):
Yeah, we did let.
We had lessons for like sixmonths and he's a great guy.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
But that's crazy that the story is very identical to
that one and in his dream Wasthere a big bearded, formerly
mulleted man teaching him theart and ways of the trombone.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
I think that came Later during his daily
meditation.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Oh good yeah cuz Nick makes sure all the students
meditate about his lessons everytime.
Yep, that's good, that's goodabout all the knowledge you're
gonna get from me.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
And and you will.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
So, yeah, check out this article if you want a
little feel-good read.
Her name is Noreen Davies.
It's in the Guardian.
That's just, it's horrible.
We want some more trombonejournalism.
Keep it coming.
All right, so we have a newquestion of the week from our
audience, dan Morris, our friendDan Morris.
Dan Morris, he wrote inresponse to last week's episode
(09:27):
about we found a trombone quoraquestion about how a trombone
would be best used as a weapon.
Right, that's right, okay, andwe tried to cover the best we
could with our vast knowledge oftrombone violence.
But his question titledtrombone violence question was
neither of you talked about howyou can use it as a blowgun.
(09:49):
With poison darts I've shotmany a thumbtack a great
distance with accuracy throughmy slide.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
So okay, that's obviously, you take off the
outer slide and it's like a peashooter at that point.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
then oh so it's like literally how pea shooter.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
Yeah, like a literal pea shooter.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, do you know anyone that's ever shot a pea of
their slide?
Speaker 2 (10:09):
I used to do the spitballs.
I'm sure you did too.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
No, I was learning the instrument.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I shot a lot of spitballs.
That's all I can tell you.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
I don't know, thumbtack, that's kind of like,
that's like a, that's an actualdangerous so that's what I'm
wondering, because you don't getquite a good seal with a
thumbtack.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
It wouldn't fill up the whole slide.
So I bet you he put it intolike a spitball so that you
could jam it in there and thenput engineering yeah, that's a
lot of engineering you inhaletoo much and you inhale the
thumbtack.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Well, that's always the danger with blowdarts.
You know poison darts and youcan, and you can mix up all the
different types of darts becauseyou know you could have the
poison dart.
You could have the put them tosleep dart, you could have the,
the darts that make them likegrow gigantic or really small.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
What is this Alice in Wonderland, all of a sudden?
Speaker 1 (11:09):
I guess you're just not familiar.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Who's your alchemist?
Where do you, where do you get?
Speaker 1 (11:13):
such a tincture.
There's a lot of.
There's a lot of methods.
Okay, I think we covered thatone.
Thank you, dan.
Please send in more questions.
Question to the quer is what'swhat's?
What should our question of theweek be, nick?
Speaker 2 (11:28):
What's your favorite and least favorite dish for
Thanksgiving?
Speaker 1 (11:32):
Okay, all right, and we can tell you if you're right
or wrong.
That's cool, and so emailtrombone retreat at gmailcom or
message us on the Instagrams orthe Facebooks or MySpace.
Yeah, our MySpace account iskilling it.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
Yeah, the custom music we have on our home screen
.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
What if?
What if you decided to likethat was your angle like I'm
just going to dominate MySpacewhile everyone's looking the
other way.
I'm going to create an army onMySpace and just get all the
attention.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Well, first of all, I think we'd have to get MySpace
back up and running.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Is it like?
Not even.
I mean no way it's running.
I actually it's like it's on,but there's it's like doesn't
work very well.
Like I found my old profile.
It's there.
Actually I should not tellpeople to go find that.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Oh my God, I bet you, your MySpace was incredible in
high school.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
I mean, you don't really do anything on it except
have your top 10, which is myspace is up, but it's not really
up.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Oh my God, so weird.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Yeah, it's like kind of there and you can, I couldn't
.
I guess you could write likeyour favorite songs.
I don't even remember what youdid on it.
Speaker 2 (12:43):
You could customize your your home screen where you
had like a like a little snippetof a song and like, yeah, you
could have.
It was kind of like in that waymore customizable than a
Facebook home page, but alsolike there's way less stuff you
could put on there in general.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
You could put all your favorite emo lyrics and emo
songs on it.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Did Sebi have an emo period period?
Speaker 1 (13:08):
That's, that's another, that's for the people
that have known me since college, of course, Let me, let me try
to guess.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Neutral Milk Hotel.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
No, that well, they are pretty great, are they?
Are they emo?
Okay, what about my chemical?
Speaker 2 (13:22):
romance.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
That was that was a little younger than me.
My jam was dashboardconfessional.
I'm not going to lie.
I went to a dashboardconfessional concert, I'll
confess.
Oh, he did it, folks.
And he actually, at the veryend of the concert he threw his
pick and it frisbee through theair like dramatically in slow
(13:45):
motion.
My arms were crossed.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Of course they were, because you were like whenever.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
Oh yeah, exactly, I was feeling all my feelings at
that point in life.
I kind of looked up for asecond.
I saw this thing whirling inthe air towards me and I was
pretty far back.
I swear to God, it landed on myforearm.
It just like frisbee throughthe air, just landed on my
forearm and I caught it and it'smine.
You were chosen.
I lost it.
I might have it somewhere.
(14:10):
I think I put it somewhere.
Then I cried for a bitScreaming and Fidelity's.
Okay.
So our next segment.
We were talking about havinggripes, but, like the most
obvious thing in the world thata friend pointed out to me is
that obviously the segmentshould be called Bone to Pick.
I know that, I know there's agreat interview series called
that, but this is just focusedon our gripe of the week and I
(14:33):
think, nick, you have a bone topick.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Well, also bone to pick is very on topic for
Thanksgiving.
Coming up, turquibone, thereyou go, turquibones.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Do you have big plans for Thanksgiving?
Speaker 2 (14:45):
I cook every year, have friends over.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Do you have a nutcracker that day?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
No, it starts on Friday, oh nice.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Are you doing all the cooking?
I'm actually going to letsomeone help you.
We're doing all the cooking,but Daniela does the desserts
and you're not going to letanyone bring anything.
Why?
Why would I do that?
Because Thanksgiving is acommunal activity where people
bring things together.
It's not a solo performance.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
I like to cook for people.
It's my love language, okay.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
That's going to be my bone to pick.
Okay, what's yours?
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Okay, turquibone players, we sit around a lot in
orchestra, that's a given Mm.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Hmm, but when conductors oh, you're gearing up
, you're, you're upset, I cantell.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Our ass.
Specifically, are we going toget to such and such section
which is like An hour away orwhatever.
In the music this is reallymuch more exaggerated.
In opera, everything's longerand we play generally less.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
And you're doing that for the reason of like do I
need to be here, Do I need to?
Speaker 2 (15:53):
be here, yeah.
And then you sit around andthey go oh yeah, of course we're
going to get to that section.
Yeah, please, please be here.
Then you sit around for anothertwo hours In rehearsal ends and
you don't play a single noteand they don't use you.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Why it's like, yes, you're getting paid, but and to
be devil's advocate, maybe theydon't know, but when they act,
so sure that they're going toget to your part and they don't.
That's bullshit and it's one ofthose things that A conductor
can easily gain, every point heever needs with a low brass
(16:30):
section, guest conductor orpermanent conductor, by just
like being aware of the factthat often we only play like one
movement and thinking aheadabout how he's going to rehearse
, and maybe like knocking outthat movement at the beginning
or communicating that likeyou'll be like the coolest
conductor ever, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Or letting the whole orchestra go like 10 minutes
early.
Oh, oh, genius, instant genius.
No, it just yeah.
It's like I don't know what itis.
Yes, you're getting paid.
I know it seems like a stupidthing to get all bent out of
shape about, but it's like Idon't know.
It feels kind of close todisrespectful, even though it's.
(17:09):
I don't think it's intentionalat all.
I really don't.
Yeah, and then, akin to that,this has happened I'm sure it's
happened to you too where yousit there forever and then you
come in and it's not like thebest trombone entrance ever,
because we've been sitting therefor an hour plus and then the
conductor is like whoa trombones, and you're like give me, give
me a break, dude.
(17:30):
Like, while you guys have beenout like playing the whole time,
we've just been sitting heregetting cold, you know.
So that's, that's, that's theskill that you have.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
So that's, that's.
That's the skill that peopledon't talk about enough.
Can you just like sit there forhalf an hour and come in on
something incredibly importantthat everyone's going to hear,
whether it be incredibly soft orloud or solo, and just be like
money, Money, money?
Speaker 2 (17:52):
money.
That's the challenge.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Yeah, totally.
I love the challenge.
It's fun, but you know it takessome, some preparation.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
And it takes a little bit of understanding of the why
.
That's of its own form ofdifficult.
It's difficult to sit there asa string player and play all
those notes, of course, butthere's also it's a completely
apples and oranges thing.
It's very difficult to sitthere and jump on the moving
train and but you're.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
But, but a conductor that, like, plays the piano.
I mean, it's just, you justpush the button.
So why don't you just push thebutton on your trombone and make
it sound good?
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
I know Sounded good on MIDI.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
Well, nick, I hope that made you feel better to
talk about that.
Conductors I know so manyconductors listen to this.
I think the only conductor isyour wife, I guarantee she's
probably good about that.
She's very good about it, sostop it All right Now.
Now time for my favoritesegment, nicholas, the trombone
Quora question of the week.
And I have to.
I have to admit, the hardestpart of my job preparing for
(18:52):
this is choosing a Quoraquestion, because the ocean of
great trombone Quora questionsis endless.
Okay, I can't wait.
So our trombone weapon questionlast week was was very helpful
for all trombonist when theyneed to defend themselves in
apocalypse.
So the trombone Quora questiontoday, and I just really like
(19:13):
how this was written.
Why don't professional tromboneplayers develop a big, beefy
right arm even after years ofdaily practice?
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Okay, my literal response would be an obvious
lack of understanding of that.
The right arm doesn't supportanything, so why would it get
strong?
The left arm should get strongof anything.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Yeah, the left arm is the beefy one.
The right arm is getting allthe cardio, you know.
So it should be like lean andcut, with the left arm being
like New Jack City.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, so the left arm is like a large man from
Finland named Magnus Fjörsen,the strongest man, and the right
arm is, like you know, a Kenyanmarathon runner.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Do you name your two biceps?
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Yeah, over here I got Kid Ori and over here You're
stealing.
Yeah, I am, and on the leftside here I got JJ Johnson.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Yeah.
So, guys, one day I realizedthat I don't know if you guys
catch this reference I mean, Ithink it maybe is from Anchorman
when he just refers to his JackO'Leary and something Johnson
like his two arms when he'sabout to get in a fight with
someone and I realized thatnothing works better than naming
your two arms old jazz drumbone player names.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
I mean it does sound intimidating.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Some Bob Brookmeyer and JJ Johnson have to say about
that.
It's just, it's endless, itreally is.
It is Frank Rosalino.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Okay, so I wonder what that would look like if
someone just had one reallystrong arm.
I guess it does happen, right.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
But, like having strength, there's difference
between strength and flexibility.
So like, if you're likeinsanely jacked, I wonder if it
affects your mobility at all.
We should talk to Ethan Garzaabout this, our friend, who's
the baster most than SeattleSymphony, who's just like a
bodybuilder and ridiculous Ifthat affects anything.
(21:27):
But he'll probably say it justmakes him more awesome, knowing
him.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Well, yeah, I mean, I don't think, I don't think we
we're qualified to answer thisquestion, because what are you
talking about?
We're equally jacked on botharms.
There you go.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
It's not a video pod yet so you can still explain how
ripped we are.
I hope that answers that personout in the universe is Trombone
query Quite.
Even he wrote even after yearsof daily practice.
And you know it is funnylooking at Trombone players
because they often, if you, ifyou just have them stand up
straight with their arms ontheir side, more often than not
(22:07):
you see the left shoulder beinga little bit higher.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
Yep and the right arm being longer.
Speaker 1 (22:12):
Those delts?
Well, cool, I think thatanswers that question.
And so, since we have a bone topick, we should balance it out
with a moment of gratitude.
Absolutely so my moment ofgratitude this week and I don't
know if I've ever talked aboutthis on the pod before so I
think one really special thingand beautiful thing that the
(22:34):
Pittsburgh Symphony does thatI've gotten to play with them
quite a bit as I've lived inhere in Pittsburgh with my
friends Jim Nova and PeteSullivan and Jeff D, doug
Rosenthal and of course, craigKnox on on Tuba.
And, as you know, as many of youknow, murray crew was the
longtime bass trombonist of thePittsburgh Symphony and in his
(22:56):
prime, you know, arguably one ofthe most talented bass
trombonist in the country.
I know Nick was a big fan, healmost came here to study with
him and Anyone that knew Murray.
He was quite a character.
We unfortunately lost him a bitearly in his life a few years
ago, but he was known for justbeing the life of the party, a
pure extrovert.
(23:16):
He'd always close down the barwith you, he'd always have a
funny story, always never beingserious, always making everybody
laugh just larger than lifepersonality, and I see that
personality a lot in his son,ralph, who's one of my best
friends here in Pittsburgh, abrilliant, brilliant person, and
he for some reason in thistotally fits Murray's
(23:37):
personality.
During every tuning note, everytuning A in the orchestra, he
would always play a pedal D.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Classic bass trombone move too.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
And not like Hydenit, pretty like.
Here's my note.
I'm warming up calibratingIntune and something really
amazing that the PittsburghSymphony trombone section does
Not all of them, but at leastone of them every single time
from now on until forever.
As long as they're in theorchestra they play a pedal D.
(24:07):
Now, ever since we lost Murray,and I got to join in on that a
few times.
Sometimes pedal Ds don't wannacome out first thing in the
morning, but I just thought thatwas so neat and so carrying on
his funny legacy.
And you see these violists turnaround, sometimes like what are
they doing back there?
And sometimes Jim Nova willplay it and like this one's for
(24:28):
you, murray, and it's justreally cool.
I got to tell Ralph that oneday, his son, and that like I
saw tears come in his eyes, likethat really meant a lot to him.
So if you ever go to aPittsburgh Symphony concert
which I highly recommend, makesure you're listening during the
tuning note.
You'll most likely hear thatpedal D.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
That is a very.
You told me that recently and Ithought that was a more than
perfect way to memorializesomeone in a very while.
It's not 100% subtle, it'srelatively subtle.
It's kind of an inside storyslash joke.
Yeah, it's just there and it'ssomething quick and something
you can do every day and that'snice.
(25:08):
I like that.
That is a feel good story,sebastian.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
You know, we feel good here, we feel good on the
retreat.
We get our anger out and thenwe feel good, because you know
why.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
You know why why?
Because hurt people hurt people.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
I like, when you really wanna get a message
across, you gotta get reallyclose to the microphone.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Hey, everybody, listen up.
This is Uncle Nick talking toyou.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
Wait, hold on.
This will be.
This segment is called 10Seconds of ASMR with Nick
Schwartz.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Hey kids, just remember, always eat your
vegetables.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
We did talk about I think the very first Trombone
retreat podcast, about how wewould do a Trombone ASMR with
Trombone sounds and spraybottles and stuff.
We should do that sometime.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
The best sound is a really good bell.
When you flick it it's likeboing.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Dude, my students at Duquesne University have gotten
this inside joke thing in thestudio now and they think it's
hilarious and they do it inrehearsals now, where they just
do the cling on the mouthpiece.
All right.
All right, that's a really highpitch and they think one of our
conductors, who's a littleolder, can't hear it and so
they'll just keep doing it.
(26:33):
It's one of those things thatsomeone will do it and you just
kinda do a double take likewhere'd that come from, where'd
they?
Speaker 2 (26:37):
and now they all do it and I'm just like guys,
there's a trumpet player in theMet who has this one straight
mute.
How do you think he uses it toplay?
He just brings it in the pitbecause it has this one feature,
which is when you go to like,you know, kind of screw in the
mute you know I'm talking aboutto like tighten it in the corks
somehow, squeak in his trumpet,and when I tell you it sounds
(27:02):
like a screaming banshee, it isthe loudest freaking sound, and
he'll do it like, right when theapplause starts, he'll just
like twist it once and it's like, just like this really quick
screech that is so freaking loudand it's like the first time
you hear.
It's terrifying.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
He's just doing it to be annoying, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
And he doesn't just want to like that, like real
quick, and then just like putsit down and pretends like
nothing happened.
We also have a horn player thatcan do this.
You know, when you bop themouthpiece with your hand, yeah
He'll.
He'll somehow like pull themouthpiece just out a little bit
and so he's it's kind of in thereceiver, but it's like in his
hand.
And when he does that and popsit on it really hard, the sound
(27:42):
it makes it sounds like apopping a cork, but like at like
a hundred times volume.
It's so freaking loud and I'venever been able to replicate it.
That's how you get yourmouthpiece stuck.
Well, that's why you hold it inyour hands, and it's not quite
in the receiver.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
But if it does, you go to howdandhornscom and you
order that, one of those greatmouthpiece puller outers.
Puller outer, that's what'scalled.
That's, that's the technicalterm.
Well, my mother is herevisiting and we're about to fly
back to Texas.
She's here.
She came to see the last operaand of course I woke up and
she'd like clean my entirekitchen and put up my Christmas
(28:19):
tree with lights and oh my God Iknow and then gave me a lecture
about the state of my kitchen.
So it was like it was a win anda loss at the same time.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
Yeah, you usually don't come out scot-free on
those.
It's never just like oh, I didthis and you're not going to
hear anything about it.
We'll give that lady a hug fromfrom Nicholas Robert Schwartz.
Did you forget?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
your name for a second I did for a second, it's
okay.
So Make sure you subscribe tothe podcast.
This has been another episode.
Obviously, trumbone retreat.
On the all the social medias,we have a lot of really cool
guests for the short formpodcast coming up and we have
some long form guests coming upsoon that we're really excited
(29:02):
about and let us know what youthink of this new format.
We're not going to do it allthe time, but I'm thinking this
is a nice way to Keep going anddon't forget to subscribe to
everything.
Press that like button,subscribe All those things and
follow Nick at base trumbone 444on the Instagrams and myself at
JS dot vera on the Instagramsand make it a great day.
(29:25):
Bye.
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